among other scenes

me: *wrote a meta about victor a few days ago*

me: *writes another meta about victor fucking immediately*  

me: ok 

I’ve been on a hell of a writing kick lately so here we are. I addressed this sort of in my last post about Victor, but I REALLY want to give it it’s own post so without further ado, let’s get into this.

The topic today is self-worth. Or, how Victor’s and Yuuri’s concept of themselves is the same yet drastically different. 

Yuuri is incredibly easy to address because his expression of anxiety and self doubt is incredibly stark. Also, we get to be privy to his thoughts more than any other character’s, so pretty much everything that directly bothers him we already know about. Yuuri is a perfectionist, he doubts his choices, his abilities, his worth (not just as a skater but as a person), I think he believes himself to be plain and not particularly attractive, but that’s more speculation on my part based on his chronic anxiety. It’s an Anxiety Thing™. 

(If you’d like to see more extensive thoughts and evidence about Yuuri’s anxiety, I wrote a thing here to backup my statements)

Yuuri is also rather expressive, while Victor just, isn’t really. 

Sure, he’s goofy and bubbly, but he hides behind walls of pleasantness and restraint. I’m sure it has to do with media training, considering how long Victor has been in the public eye. 


What I mean to say here is that Yuuri and Victor experience two different facets of self doubt. Yuuri can’t recognize his abilities, doesn’t believe in his own potential, can’t accept his achievements, etc etc. But I think Victor can do all those things. Victor knows his skills, he knows he’s essentially the best around, he knows he’s attractive and sought after. Victor knows this and can accept it. Victor’s biggest issue is his belief that if he doesn’t keep up a mask, he’s unlovable. 

I think it’s been implied that Victor isn’t close to many people at all. When the video of Yuuri skating his routine went up, Victor seemed to easily jump on the next plane to Japan. He had no qualms and was clearly excited to leave. It’s been suggested in multiple fics (one off the top of my head being pt3 of Even Ice Gods Can Melt…what a fucking amazing little series, please go read it) that the only things in Russia Victor felt truly attached to were Yakov and Makkachin and Victor took Makkachin with him…

He interacts with several people in the skating community friendly enough (Stephane in ep12, those 3 girls in Russia Jackets in ep4), but the only person he seems to be friends with is Chris. They seem to know each other well and clearly get along wonderfully. 

We don’t really see Victor interact closely with others other than Yuuri, Yuri, and Yakov. Yakov seems to be a father figure while I think Victor views Yuri as sort of a younger brother. However, he still runs out of the country, essentially forgetting about Yuri, so there you go. 

Right, so. Victor isn’t close to many people. Humans are social animals, we need to have frequent, positive interaction with others to maintain mental–and, subsequently, physical–health. If you don’t get these interactions, it’s easy to form misconceptions about yourself. Such as, if I can’t get close to or speak to others, there must be something wrong with me, right? Or, no one knows what I’m actually like, and that’s probably for the better. 

Both Yuuri and Victor struggle with the idea of love and support. Yuuri, as he says in ep5, couldn’t feel the love and support around him for a very long time. Victor, as he says in ep12, felt that he had to work completely alone to advance himself. I think this implies that Victor deliberately pushed people away by keeping up this pleasant mask and never allowing them to see in any deeper. 

Yuuri’s distancing is incredibly physical (actually avoiding people, literal pushing, curling up, etc.) while Victor’s is more emotional (he doesn’t physically avoid but exclusively emotionally walls off).

I keep coming back to this mask of publicity pleasantness. It’s what got me thinking about this idea in the first place. In that Victor meta I linked to up there, I talked a bit about the beach scene, among other things. Victor names off a ton of options to gage what Yuuri wants him to be. It doesn’t occur to Victor to be himself until Yuuri asks him to. It doesn’t occur to Victor that he could be desired as himself. 

He has this media image that people are accustomed to: handsome, elegant, playboy, pleasant, a gentleman, etc. This is what Victor is liked for. He probably hasn’t dropped that persona–at least for an extensive amount of time–in front of others for a very long time. It occurs to Victor to be whatever Yuuri would like, and it doesn’t cross his mind that Yuuri just likes him

I love Victor and his character arc so damn much. Really looking forward to this movie–whenever it’s coming out–to see if they look further into this insecure side of Victor. 

(I feel like this post is just me rehashing stuff but like I really adore how Victor is written and idk how to shut up)

Hi guys! It’s lovely to see the 13 Reasons Why fandom growing, but let’s keep in mind not to trivialize the themes the show portrays. Let’s not glorify the suicide and rape scenes in edits/gifs/icons and it would be better if trigger warnings were properly tagged when one of these scenes are present.

Frankly, posting edits of the suicide and rape scenes (among others) which are already very graphic in nature is very insensitive. Let’s not continue this practice and make our fandom a safe space for survivors and people who may be triggered by such content.


I know i post this a bit late, but, I just missed this scene, when the first time ever he was in crowd, without his mask, and he covered his face because he thought he was ugly but in fact he wasn’t. This was among other happy scene he had, before everything went south… poor prince… another week to go for new episode, I can’t wait!!!

Maybe the People Would Be the Times or Between Clark and Hilldale
Maybe the People Would Be the Times or Between Clark and Hilldale

Love - Maybe the People Would Be the Times or Between Clark and Hilldale (1967)

This song doesn’t get as much attention as other songs on Forever Changes, and maybe it doesn’t reach the heights of Alone Again Or, or You Set the Scene among others. Besides describing the LA scene in 1967,  I enjoy Arthur Lee’s playful lyrical idea - starting the next verse with the missing word from the last verse.

look. we got jonas being a precious pup, eva looking happy af, sana and noora talking and being friends again and YOUSANA BEING CONFIRMED, mahdi dancing with elias which was literally a PRECIOUS sequence, magnus and vilde not being gross, vilde and linn talking, chris lookin’ fresh as always, everyone being happy and festive, ESKILD BEING LITERALLY THE BEST HUMAN BEING AND willhelm & p chris reappearence which was not necessary at all but at least it was SO FUNNY I COULDN’T STOP LAUGHING, among other hilarious scenes/moments. so please. just for a small moment: stop talking about even!!!! we all now that this season’s terribly written but there’s still a lot of stuff to get solved and it can’t happen all at once!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ASOIAF Minor Characters Meme - 2/9 Scenes

Lady Smallwood gave her breeches, belt, and tunic to wear, and a brown doeskin jerkin dotted with iron studs. “They were my son’s things,” she said. “He died when he was seven.”

“I’m sorry, my lady.” Arya suddenly felt bad for her, and ashamed.


Many a tears were shed as that smile broke through the blurry veil of his lost identity, despite the pain he endured, despite the demons of his past that shall forever haunt him, despite the broken and bloody memories that make him loathe himself. May be he smiled for Steve, ‘cause he sensed how much Steve had wanted assurance. He wanted Steve to know that it was alright, that it was the right thing to do. Had he not assured him, Steve might have stopped him from going through it all again. So may be the smile was to convey the definitive decision in the form of a plea or an explanation: “It’s alright, Steve. I’ll be alright. Let me do this. So I am no more a burden to you. So I am no more a burden to me. Let me slip back to slumber so I do not see those haunting faces again. Please do not be hurt. I know that you have done all for me. And I could ask of you no more.”

This, of all the Stucky scenes before, had been the first peaceful moment between the two, where they are not rushing to a fight or running from someone. The emotions, of decades, finally settle in, and words left unsaid thrashes within their minds without an outlet. We then see Steve, who stands unmoving, looking at Bucky in an almost reverent manner, as though if he were to reach out and touch his fingers would slip through the vision. He recalls the innumerable moments he had spent, in war-damaged camps, hoping his Bucky would walk in through the battered tent’s entryway, hoping to see that dirt-smeared face and that lopsided smile again, hoping for his presence that gave Steve the strength to fight any force of greatness, hoping for his very life to return to him. And here in this moment, it felt like some unknown power had heard his silent prayers, and he was afraid that if he were to blink the image before him would disappear into nothingness again. He calmly listens to Bucky without the slightest interference, allowing Bucky his decision without a protest; he would do all and more for him. “You are here, that is enough for me. I waited for you, despite believing that you will never come back. So can I not wait another lifetime, when now, I know that you will return to me.”

Love and Breadcrumbs (John and Sherlock's relationship arc): His Last Vow

MASTER POST on John and Sherlock’s relationship beats in S03:03 His Last Vow.

WITH THANKS to mid0nz, ivyblossom, loudest-subtext-in-television and arcfanmom, among others.

A note about “Beats”: A beat is a moment in a story when something new happens to change the dynamic (or reinforce the dynamic). A screenplay typically has a rhythm of positive and negative beats. This creates tension (I love you/I hate you). My judgments of beats here is strictly related to the John/Sherlock relationship plotline. So, for instance, Sherlock dying and resurrecting himself for John is ‘positive’ because it shows how much Sherlock cares about John, even though the same scene might be a negative beat on the CAM mystery case plotline.

SCENE:    John dreams of Sherlock and goes off to look for the neighbor’s kid at a crack den

  • John is bored in his “safe” marriage and dreams of Sherlock and danger.
  • When talking to Isaac’s mother, John is role-playing Sherlock – the blue robe, the cruel questions, etc.  Source post: uberchunks.
  • John is irritable with Mary he goes to a crack den to rescue Isaac and resists her coming along. She does anyway. 
  • Positive beat (+)

Sub-text: John misses life with Sherlock. The safe suburban life is not for him. 

SCENE:    At the crack den, BAMF!John beats up a guy

  • Positive beat (+)

Sub-text: John craves the danger Sherlock provided, acts out to get his fix. 

SCENE:   John finds Sherlock at the crack den and takes him to the lab to have his blood tested. Molly confirms Sherlock is high.

  • They haven’t seen each other for a month, but it’s unclear who avoided whom. My bets on both–Sherlock because he’s defensively withdrawing; John because he’s not sure how to handle his renewed attraction from TSoT when Sherlock was being so nice. (with a nod to loudest-subtext-in-television)
  • John yells at Sherlock - “If you felt this (drugs) coming on, why didn’t you call me?”  Anti-social Sherlock says its for a case, dismissing everyone’s concern. 
  • Molly slaps Sherlock for “wasting his gifts”. Sherlock comments on her lack of engagement ring. Molly confirms that her relationship with Tom is off.  In S3 Molly/Tom mirror (and predict) John/Mary.  Both Molly and John tried to get over Sherlock by dating someone similar. Neither will find it satisfactory.  (Source: leandraholmes)
  • Wiggy deduces in the lab that John has been biking to work. Sherlock mentions it too. Sherlock mentions the attack on Wiggy was a fix for John. This is tying John’s biking and attacking Wiggy to Sherlock’s drugs–coping mechanisms.
  • Negative beat (-)

Sherlock subtext: I can’t deal with John getting married and eased the pain with drugs. I’m withdrawing from him and everyone else.

John subtext: See? Sherlock is self-destructive and can’t be trusted. 

SCENE:   At Baker Street, Mycroft is running a drugs bust

  • John called Mycroft about the drugs.

Subtext:  John is really worried and needs help dealing with this. He’s putting Sherlock in a child’s position here (not undeservedly).

  • Mycroft says Sherlock is “back on the sauce” and compares his drug use to “Uncle Rudy’s cross-dressing.”

Subtext:  Possible dig from Mycroft about Sherlock’s attraction to 'straight’ John.  (Source: nibsandink)

SCENE:   At Baker Street, John discovers Janine

gif by holmeswatsn

  • God!  The look on Martin’s face above with that fake smile and absolutely unhappy and confused eyes!
  • John discovers a nearly naked Janine in Sherlock’s bedroom. An astonished John confronts Sherlock about this and Sherlock plays it up, saying they’re in a relationship.  John displays strong jealousy and is fixated on Janine no matter how Sherlock tries to change the subject.

Subtext:  John is still in love with Sherlock.

Possible subtext:  Sherlock is enjoying making John jealous.

  • John tells Janine Sherlock is in the bath – “I’m sure he’ll be out in a minute.” And Janine says “Oh, like he ever is.” Possible reference to not “being out” as a gay man?  (Source: il0vedaydreaming)
  • ASiB callback– John keeps asking Sherlock about “dinner”.  In ASiB Irene keeps inviting Sherlock to 'dinner’, meaning sex. (Source: 221beemine/anon). 

Subtext:  Are you having sex with Janine?  I need to understand this. I need to know if you’re a) not asexual and b) heterosexual, because I NEED to know if I ever have a shot.

  • Also, at the flat, Sherlock has moved John’s chair out.  

Subtext: Sherlock can’t bear losing John and is trying to avoid all reminders.  Also, possibly, Sherlock couldn’t bear for Janine to sit in it.

  • Negative beat (-)

John thinks Janine is confirmation that, if Sherlock sleeps with anyone, it’s women (Janine, Irene).

SCENE:  Sherlock proposes to Janine in order to get her to let them into CAM’s private office

  • When John sees the ring, he is aghast.  He has just heard it is Janine up there, and in this moment he puts it together–that Sherlock has used Janine and that he’s now even proposing to her to manipulate her into letting them in.
  • John as they get in the elevator: “Sherlock, she loves you!” Sherlock: “As I said, human error.” The visual language here says it all.

Subtext (Sherlock): I loved you and got crushed so I’m going back to my cold, sociopathic facade.

Subtext (John):  I was right, you’re incapable of feeling for anyone. You crushed and discarded me just as you are doing to Janine (the fall).  Do I really even know you and what you’re capable of (the Moriarty mirror shot).

  • Negative beat. This is the MOST DESTRUCTIVE beat in this entire episode.  It reinforces the “Big Misunderstanding” that Sherlock doesn’t care for John.

SCENE:  Mary shoots Sherlock in Magnussen’s office

  • This is a crucial moment for the John/Sherlock arc because Mary is currently the obstacle between them.  At this moment, we know she’s a villain. Though she seems to recover in John’s eyes, and maybe even Sherlock’s in this episode, she will never recover in the eyes of the audience.  Nor, ultimately, can she prevail in any half-sane story.

Subtext:  Sooner or later Mary will pay dearly for this. She won’t ultimately win.

  • The above shot as Mary shoots Sherlock is likely foreshadowing. We see three Marys here. We’ve already seen two–the charming Mary of TEH and TSoT and now the blackmailed ex-assassin of HLV. Also, in TSoT John tries to interest Sherlock in a case– “My husband is three people.” Could there be yet another aspect of Mary still to come in S4?  (Source:  anybannannie)
  • Mary shoots Sherlock in the chest, a wound almost certain to kill but not instantly (see Pocket Owl’s comments on the wound). She calls for an ambulance – her way of giving Sherlock a slim chance and avoiding guilt? Good discussion here. (source: Mycroft Holmes Fan)  

  • We also have the obvious symbolism of Mary shooting Sherlock in the chest.  She’s the one who has broken his heart by marrying John. We even see her, for a moment, shoot him while wearing her wedding dress. This shot comes immediately before the Sherlock-Redbeard bit, tying them together. Mary is why Sherlock lost John.
  • Positive beat (Mary is doomed). 

SCENE: Sherlock dies and fights his way back from the dead for John’s sake.

  • Sherlock descends into his mind palace.  The stairways and hall look like the ones in ASiP (showing how deeply meeting John influenced him).

  • In order to 'calm himself’ and keep from going into shock, Sherlock remembers Redbeard, his dog. Mycroft warned Sherlock to not be too attached to John by comparing the situation to Redbeard.  Sherlock tells Redbeard “They’re putting me down too.  It’s no fun, is it?”

Subtext:  Sherlock is capable of deep attachment, but got his heart broken as a child when his beloved dog was put down. He probably determined not to care after that. Paralleling his loss of John.

Subtext:  I’m no longer needed, because John has moved on.

  • In the cell with chained Moriarty, Sherlock asks Moriarty how he manages to avoid feeling.  Moriarty says you have to feel, you just don’t have to fear it.  Even loss is 'good’.

Sub-text:  Part of Sherlock wants to eradicate his painful, frustrated feelings for John, but part of him knows that even pain and loss should be borne but not feared.

  • Sherlock literally dies, but pulls himself back FROM FLATLINE (by pounding the floor of the cell and restarting his own heart)  to ‘save John’ from Mary’s evil influence.

Subtext (Sherlock): I love you (John) in an extraordinarily powerful way.  

  • Very positive beat

SCENE:  John discovers Sherlock shot and calls an ambulance

  • We don’t see a lot of John during the shooting or at bedside in hospital. This episode keeps John remote. It’s more about Sherlock’s sacrifice and his POV.  Let’s just say John is very, very not happy here.  He sticks with Sherlock in the ambulance and keeps close tabs on him in hospital (though this is all kept off screen and veiled to the viewer).  This is really the minimum they could show of John’s reaction and keep him in character.

Sub-text:  John is incredibly upset about anyone daring to harm Sherlock, but we’re deliberately being kept away from much of his POV, probably because he’s still guarding his heart and the writers don’t intend that to shift until S4.

  • Neutral beat

SCENE:  Janine visits Sherlock in the hospital and discusses their sex life

  • First, let’s just contemplate the fact that they show both Mary and Janine bedside with Sherlock in hospital but never John.  John was there, we’re just not shown those moments with Sherlock. Why? John is being kept at a distance from us. We’re not sure what’s going through his mind. Showing him bedside would reveal too much, one way or the other.
  • Also in hospital, John tells Mary that Sherlock’s first word when he woke up was “Mary”. John looks a bit confused at that.

Sub text:  Wow, now he actually likes you more than me. Confirms John’s confusion over what Sherlock feels for him. (Source: thescienceofarticulation)

  • Janine has sold her story to the tabloids, making up wild sex stories about Sherlock. Alone, she tells him she wishes they had done it “at least once.”  Sherlock says he was waiting until after they were married.  Janine says ” I know what kind of man you are. We could have been friends.”
  • Positive beat

Subtext (and text): Blatant confirmation that Sherlock is gay (which we were told in TSoT). He never had sex with Janine or Irene.

(hmmm moment)  On the other hand, if John sees the stories and believes them, will he be more convinced Sherlock is straight? Or will he know they are false? 

SCENE:  Sherlock drags himself out of the hospital bed and confronts Mary at The Empty House.

  • Sherlock drags himself out of the hospital bed in order to confront Mary.

Subtext: Again, Sherlock is going through extraordinary, life-threatening measures, and physical pain, for John.

  • Sherlock sets up a scenario at the Empty House in which Mary confesses in front of John.  John now knows what Mary is and that she shot Sherlock. He’s PISSED.
  • Positive beat. 

Subtext:  Sherlock has beaten Mary. There’s no way John can go back to her now.

  • Sherlock is deducing here. He tests hypothesis #1 by getting Mary to shoot the coin. She’s a crack shot. He says he could have given him a kill shot if she’d wanted to. No, that shot was 'surgery’.  [we know Sherlock did die, and die quckly, so there are problems with this. But for now let’s accept that, yes, she could have shot him in the brain or heart.]
  • Mary tells Sherlock if John knew “It would break him. And I would lose him forever.  And I will never let that happen.”  She also seems about to shoot Sherlock again when he’s in the shadows, before he reminds her that her face is projected on the building.

Subtext:  Mary’s love is selfish. She wants to keep John for her own sake and is willing to kill Sherlock to achieve that.  This is set up to contrast with Sherlock, whose love is unselfish.  (Source: loudest-subtext-in-television)

Shot analysis:  The shot below shows that John (on the right) has a narrow path with no escape. His path will lead him to Sherlock, but first he has to get past Mary.  (Source:  madcapped)

SCENE:  At the flat, Sherlock talks John into listening to Mary (and ultimately returning to her).

  • Sherlock tells John that he choose Mary because he is “abnormally attracted to dangerous situations and people”.  John, devastated, replies “Yeah, but she wasn’t supposed to be like that.”  (ouch, the heartbreak)
  • Positive beat.  This is the biggest johnlock signpost this episode.  

Subtext:  John was 'abnormally attracted’ to Sherlock. Mary was unconsciously chosen as a Sherlock substitute. But John did not recognize this. He thought he’d chosen Mary because she was a safe place to put his heart whereas Sherlock broke it. So now John has a wife who is just as dangerous as Sherlock AND he doesn’t get to have Sherlock himself (which is what he wants) in exchange for that risk.  Question: does Sherlock realize what he’s implying about John? I don’t think he does. He was astonished John considered him his 'best friend’. He didn’t realize Molly was in love with him. He knows John is attracted to danger and thus life with him, but I believe he still thinks John is straight sexually.

Also:  John had trust issues from S1.E1. What is this further betrayal going to do to his ability to ever trust again?

  • John tells Mary to take a seat like a client and he and Sherlock will decide her fate.
  • Positive beat. 

Subtext:  Now it’s me and Sherlock against you (vs the wedding where Sherlock was the 3rd wheel). We’re a team who will figure out what’s to be done.

  • Mary asks Sherlock “What do you know already” and Sherlock says: “By your skill set, you are or were an intelligence agent. Your accent is currently English but I suspect you are not. You’re on the run from something. You’ve used your skills to disappear, Magnussen knows your secret, which is why you were going to kill him, and I assume you befriended Janine in order to get close to him.”  Note that none of these things are unforgivable by themselves.
  • Sherlock then tests hypothesis #2: he times how long it takes for an ambulance to get to his flat.  It takes 8 minutes and John didn’t find him for five = thirteen minutes. The ambulance got there well before that. He thus concludes that Mary called the ambulance immediately after shooting him. This seems to be the last bit that turns Sherlock’s attitude around.

Subtext: Mary was being blackmailed by Magnussen and she was trying to protect John. She behaved like a cornered rat. She didn’t give me an immediately lethal gunshot and sentiment made her call the ambulance. She does care about me.

Analysis: Mary did not, in fact, call the ambulance, which I suspect we’ll learn in S4. Others have posited it was Magnussen. A dead Sherlock means he’s lost his hold on Mycroft, and we saw Magnussen awake when John found Sherlock.  In addition, we know the shot she gave him was lethal as he began to die almost immediately. Sherlock wants to believe in Mary. Moffat said in an interview that Sherlock was told Redbeard “went to live in a big meadow” and he chose to believe it because he could not handle the emotion otherwise. We’re seeing this here. It’s he himself who is blinded by sentiment.

  • Mary neither confirms nor denies Sherlock’s excuses on her behalf. Sherlock is giving John a reason to forgive Mary. 
  • When Sherlock collapses after the paramedics arrive, his last words to John are these:  “John, Magnussen is all that matters now.  You can trust Mary. She saved my life.” He then collapses.  So his final words to John, while again at death’s door are– Trust Mary.
  • Negative beat.

Further Reference:  Did Mary mean to kill Sherlock? post  and The Problem with Mary.

  • Shot analysis:  In the scene where Mary is being 'judged’ by John and Sherlock she is all in neutral colors.  She is not the dominant one here; her future is unknown. Later, once she has won John back, she is in bright red.


  • There is a the time gap of “several months” in which John is not speaking to Mary. Surely there would have been development on the John/Sherlock line in 2 months he’s not speaking to his wife. We can assume the gap was put there because a) they wanted Mary to be more pregnant when Moriarty shows up and b) they wanted the Magnussen denouement scene to happen at Christmas. So like the writers, we’ll ignore the gap.  
  • Alternative interpretation – there is something significant that happens here, perhaps 'plans put in place’ by Sherlock, Mycroft and/or John, that won’t be revealed until S4.

SCENE:  John forgives Mary and reconciles with her

  • Holmes parents mirror.  At the Christmas party, Sherlock’s dad (the ‘ordinary’ guy who dresses like John) tells Mary he always found Sherlock’s mom (the ‘genius’ who dresses like Sherlock) ‘unbelievably hot’.  Source: 221behavior.

Subtext:  John has always found Sherlock 'unbelievably hot’.  And yes, Martin always played it like that IMHO. Can we blame him?  

Also see this post on how the show sexualizes Sherock visually when he’s shown from John’s POV. (Source professorfangirl)

  • Positive beat (+).
  • Mycroft tells Sherlock that Magnussen is “not a dragon for you to slay”.  Setting up an analogy.
  • John forgives a very pregnant Mary and takes her back. He says he never looked at the USB that held all her secrets. He doesn’t want to know.

Sub-text: Sherlock broke my heart (in the fall) and is incapable of feeling genuinely for someone else (confirmed by Janine), so I’m throwing my lot in with you.  Maybe you really can be my Sherlock substitute since now I know you’re dangerous. And, you know, we actually have sex. And you’re carrying my child.  

I do believe John loves Mary, though I don’t think it will ever be the “soul bond” he has with Sherlock (and also, Mary is really much worse that he’s given her credit for). He’s still redirecting.

  • Very negative beat.
  • Shot analysis:  Note Mary in bright red.  She’s dominant in this scene. She’s getting her way.

CLIMATIC SCENE:  Sherlock sacrifices himself by shooting CAM in front of government agents to protect Mary (but really John).

  • Magnussen says here that Sherlock’s pressure point is John and John’s is Mary.  

Subtext:  Mary is John’s priority now. He’s still distancing himself from Sherlock over the broken heart/trust issue.

  • John tells Magnussen he 'doesn’t understand’ and Magnussen tells him to put it on a T-shirt–and then 'still don’t understand’ on the back. This is funny, however it serves another purpose…

Subtext:  John doesn’t understand what’s going on in this whole scene. He won’t understand why Sherlock kills Magnussen.

  • Magnussen calls John, while watching the bonfire footage, a “damel in distress.”  This ties with with Mycroft’s dragon metaphor.

Subtext:  We’re being told clearly who Sherlock kills Magnussen (the dragon) for. John is the 'damsel in distress’, not Mary. Sherlock slays the dragon for John. (and in the end, the damsel goes home with someone else, but we all know it’s not supposed to end like that).

ALT READ:  Mary is ultimately the 'dragon’ that Sherock will save John from. RE: Mycroft’s “Magnussen is not a dragon for you to slay”

  • Sherlock, realizing, Magnussen has the dirt on Mary only in his own head, shoots him in front of approaching government agents and Mycoft, stealing John’s gun to do so.  He tells John “Give Mary my love. Tell her she’s safe now”.  Indicating, again, that Sherlock has really forgiven Mary.
  • He does this to protect Mary and John, fulfilling the vow he made at their wedding.
  • IMHO, he also does it in sheer rage from watching Magnussen flick John’s face, humiliating John.  Don’t touch John Watson, MoFo!
  • Positive beat.

Subtext (Sherlock): I love you so much, I’m giving up my life and my work so you can be happy with Mary and safe from the people that would harm you and Mary and the baby.

Subtext (John):  John is pretty much in shock here, but when Sherlock says “Give Mary my love,” I think John processes Sherlock actions as a) sociopathic and dangerous (Sherlock being Sherlock) and b) for Mary. He doesn’t recognize that Sherlock did it out of love for him. This is underscored by Magnussen’s jokes about John not understanding and the T-shirt.  This is a call back to Mary telling John to put “I don’t shave for Sherlock Holmes” on a T-shirt. John was equally in denial about what was really going on there.

WRAP UP SCENE:  Sherlock is being sent into permanent exile (and to his death).  He says good-bye to John at the plane.

  • Sherlock is being sent into exile, never to see John again. As they say goodbye, Sherlock tells John his full name (William Sherlock Scott Holmes).

Subtext:  I’m giving you something no one else has of me. (source: mid0nz!)

Also a callback to ASiB, the episode where John realizes his feelings for Sherlock.

Analysis: Sherlock uses his one extraordinary name and hides the ordinary ones. He has a need to be seen as extraordinary. John is the opposite. He hides his odder name (Hamish) and goes by his plain names. He has a need to be seen as/and or disguises himself as ordinary. (Source: oldgrimalkin)

  • Sherlock says he has something to tell John he’s never said before and then tells a joke. 

Subtext option #1:  Sherlock is going to tell John he loves him but chickens out at the last minute.

Subtext option #2:  Sherlock is letting John go and he doesn’t want to burden him with guilt or remorse so he jokes like it’s not big deal. (self-sacrificing).  

Subtext option #3: Sherlock wants to see John smile one last time.

IMHO – 2 & 3

  • They shake hands and part.  John seems a bit moved but not overly unconcerned about losing Sherlock forever.

Subtext (John): I’ll miss you, but you’re really not capable of caring for me in any meaningful way (the Fall, confirmed by Janine), so maybe it’s for the best.  I have Mary and the baby to care for now.  This is John’s cracks showing and his serious trust issues.

  • In this scene, Mary is wearing red.  She tells Sherlock she’ll “keep John in trouble.”

Subtext (Mary):  You can leave him with me. I can keep him satisfied. Buh-bye.

  • Very negative beat

Shot Analysis:  Mary is glaringly wearing red in this shot. She is the dominant one. She is the one getting her way here.  She’s won. (Source: me and 221BeeMine)

  • After they find out Moriarty is still alive, Mary seems oddly upset “You said he was dead, Moriarty.”  

Tentative Subtext:  Moriarty’s return threatens Mary in some way (beyond the obvious that he’s a known master criminal)?

SUMMATION of HLV and Season 3: 

As I wrote in my post “Penance: Sherlock in S3”, the overwhelming theme of S3 is that Sherlock returns to a shattered John Watson and spends all of S3 trying to atone for what he’s done. Sherlock does not offer John a good reason why he faked his own death and disappeared. He’s flippant and even cruel in the subway in TEH. So while John tentatively ‘forgives him’, in reality, John has decided never to trust Sherlock with his heart again. He will give that to Mary.  There are moments in TSoT where Sherlock shows John he really does care. But in HLV, the situation with Janine reinforces to John that Sherlock is heartless to those who love him.  Finding out Mary has lied to him the entire time further breaks John down and undermines his ability to trust anyone. 

Sherlock, on the other hand, goes through tremendous growth in S3. He has a sexual awakening and comes to a conscious recognition that he is in love with John Watson, but he realizes this too late. He subsequently buries the pain by going back to drugs. But when John is in danger again, Sherlock sacrifices everything for John, showing that he has learned to love selflessly.  John, unfortunately, does not know how Sherlock feels.  This is the “big misunderstanding”.

At the end of S3, Mary has won John back, and Sherlock is left out in the cold.  The season ends on a negative beat in the John/Sherlock plotline (then again, S2 did as well).

Other Resources: 

Shots that parallel shots in “A Study in Pink” by the-sherlocked-avatar

Ivyblossom on John’s state of mind in S3 (hasn’t forgiven Sherlock)

Marsdaydream on how John substitutes Mary for Sherlock

Indy “T-Bone” Falcon on why John blames himself

acafanmom on the same

Speculation on the future of johnlock by loudest-subtext-in-television

Good medical discussion on the gunshot wound by Pocket Owl and kate221b. Thank God for smart fans.

Theory on Sherlock and Mycroft plotting to take Mary down later due to the baby by obscure affection.

A theory that Sherlock is placating Mary until the baby is born from wsswatson. (I don’t subscribe to this theory.  See my response here.  But it’s an interesting counter argument.)

I’ll update this post as I discover more, so please PM me if you have something to add.


Whenever someone talks about ‘agency’ and ‘freedom’ as a ‘very critical difference’ between Jun and Akechi I have to sigh and wave my hand at Shido’s Palace and all the implications therein, place flashing neon signs over the Death Threat scene, among other things like the TV station trying to incite shit (that audience poll, much?) and jab fingers at the conversations Shido had with his lackeys heavily implying that even slacking off = death

That’s not to mention the matter of him being forced into the media constantly and only having one place, one, where he can actually be his unguarded self in front of another human being

Yeah… total freedom am I right

Agency is distorted at the very least and you cannot say there isn’t a problem with it after the narrative explicitly denotes him as both a victim and an unknowing puppet- yes actually, a tool - which by definition, does not have fullest agency to begin with even if he believed himself to be in control (y’know, due to his ‘I gotta be an adult’ complex). He did have some of his own chains on him, yes, but the fact that he even HAD any to begin with was down to Shido. That’s. The Point.

Also Yaldabaoth is literally the god of control. Try again

@madchen  griffith always looks so solemn in flashbacks post eclipse… i guess thats the kind of face he always held when golden age/guts perspective griff emoted a lot more. or maybe im reading too much into it idk. but i agree casca also found an adopted family with the band its very sweet                            

hmm good point. I don’t remember all of them but in general post eclipse flashbacks do seem a lot more… generic than flashbacks during the golden age did? like pre-eclipse guts thought about the “do I need a reason” scene like a million times, among other emotional scenes, but post eclipse there’s a lot of griffith facing away and/or being on a horse.

idk. it’d be nice to see more closeness in flashbacks to highlight Guts’ feelings of loss, but it’s a minor thing

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me - Film Review

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me is a 1992 psychological horror film, directed by the legendary David Lynch. It serves not only as a prequel to the events that take place in the cult show Twin Peaks, but also as a sequel, narrating the last seven days of Laura Palmer and giving insight in the murder of Teresa Banks (Pamela Gidley), as well as explaining the fate of Agent Cooper after he ends up trapped inside the Black Lodge. It stars Sheryl Lee, Moira Kelly, Chris Isaak, David Bowie, Ray Wise and Kyle MacLachlan. It didn’t do well, commercially speaking, and it wasn’t well-received by critics either, mainly because Twin Peaks had been cancelled a year before the movie came out and it had lost its momentum. People had lost interest in the world of Twin Peaks, and when the film was out they expected to see what they had seen for two years on the show, and they didn’t. The film didn’t have a lot to do with the series, basically because things were different before Laura Palmer (Sheryl Lee) died, and also because the plot is focused on her story, not on the stories of the surrounding characters in town. People missed the humour of the show, and don’t get me wrong, I kind of did too, but at the same time, I understood that most of it had to be cut out, because it wouldn’t have blended well with the terrible events surrounding Laura’s character.

I became a fan of the show last year, and I first watched the film this Spring. I think I’ve seen it three or four times now, and the more times I watch it, the more I enjoy and appreciate it. That is what happens with a David Lynch film, you have to watch it more than once. Because his films are complex. They make you think. He manages to fit a piece of art into a two-hour-long feature film. I like Fire Walk With Me. The reason why is because I love Laura, and Sheryl Lee’s brilliant performance.

For the first half an hour we see FBI agent Chester Desmond (Chris Isaak) investigating the murder of Teresa Banks. His character was created for the movie (it was Cooper who was going to investigate the case, but MacLachlan initially refused to appear in the film, and ended up only shooting footage for five days) and so we knew nothing about him before the film came out, but I think his on-screen time was very enjoyable. We then see Cooper on the FBI headquarters in Philadelphia, predicting that Teresa’s killer will kill again, and it will be a ‘blonde, sexually active high-school girl’, and we also see him in the Black Lodge.

Oddly, David Bowie appears briefly on the movie as FBI agent Phillip Jeffries. I don’t understand why he appears as one of the main actors on the credits for publicity of the film when he only appears in one scene. He’s David freaking Bowie, but Dana Ashbrook for instance, who is not featured as one of the main actors, appears in more scenes that him and plays an important role on the film.

Then, we get to the town of Twin Peaks. Everybody in Twin Peaks knows Laura, the homecoming queen, but only on the surface: no one really knows what she is going through inside. On the outside she is a high-school student and helps Norma Jennings (Peggy Lipton) and Shelly Johnson (Madchen Amick) on Meals on Wheels. She also dates Bobby Briggs (Dana Ashbrook). But what people don’t know is that she is a cocaine addict and a prostitute, and that she is cheating on Bobby with James Hurley. They also don’t know that she’s been a victim of incest since the age of twelve. Other actors that appear on film that we saw in the show are Heather Graham as Annie Blackburn, Catherine Coulson as the Log Lady, Peggy Lipton and Madchen Amick, among others.

There are two scenes on the film that blow my mind: one of them is the one in which Laura arrives at the Roadhouse to meet two clients, where singer Julie Cruise is performing ‘Questions In A World Of Blue’. At the door she runs into the Log Lady, who warns her of her fate, and Laura breaks down in tears seconds after. When she finds out that her best friend Donna Hayward (Moira Kelly) has chased her to the Roadhouse, it only makes things worse. Though strong, Laura is broken inside. Another one is the ending, in which Cooper comforts a depressed Laura in the Black Lodge, right after her death. All of a sudden, an angel appears and she weeps with joy, like Donna’s father had predicted in a deleted scene from the film. The music, the lightning, the colours, the look in Laura’s face and Sheryl Lee’s acting make it a memorable ending scene. But I would say that the most remarkable scene from the film is probably the one in which Donna asks Laura that if she were falling down in space, would she stop after a while or go faster and faster, to which Laura responds 'Faster and faster. And for a while you wouldn’t feel anything. And you’d burst into fire forever. And the angels wouldn’t help you, because they’ve all gone away.’

It is true that the success of the film was against all odds with Twin Peaks falling down and the plot containing incest and murder, but that doesn’t mean the film lacks quality. Sheryl Lee and Ray Wise’s performances are magnificent, and so is the soundtrack. I didn’t know what to expect the first time I watched it. A friend of mine, who was a fan of the show, had hated it, and told me that it was a waste of time. The friend I was gonna watch it with told me that it was really worth it because it was very cool to see how Laura was so ahead of the rest of the characters. And I knew the film had been a commercial and critical flop, but I was very interested in knowing how Laura really was. And I was not disappointed when I watched it. By the beginning of the second season of the show I had made my mind up that Twin Peaks had become scary. And the film could only be scarier. I was very focused on Laura’s story and so I didn’t feel like something was missing. Even though Sherilyn Fenn’s character Audrey and Lara Flynn Boyle did not appear on the film, Sheryl Lee alone made up for it. And I personally liked Moira Kelly’s portrayal of Donna. I think she encapsulated the innocence of the character before she lost her best friend. We see a very different Donna from the one on the show, she doesn’t smoke, she doesn’t wear Laura’s glasses and she doesn’t bite James’ finger.

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me is a hard film to watch. It is disturbing, depressing and violent. But as everything Lynch does, it’s also beautiful. It’s a piece of art that has been created with a lot of care and detail. I think it was Naomi Watts that said in an interview that when you watch a David Lynch film, you take it with you when it ends, it remains in your head and it takes you to another place when you watch it. And I couldn’t agree more. Everytime I watch Fire Walk With Me, I keep on thinking of Laura after the movie finishes, or I feel like her. I feel tremendous empathy and simpathy for her character. And while I don’t snort cocaine nor do I sell my body to strangers, I feel identified with her to an extent because of some personal experiences and I think that is the main reason why I am a big fan of it. Because I can see a piece of myself in Laura.

I invite you to watch this work of art with an open mind.


THE BLACKLIST cast talk – among other – about their action scenes

…why, Hojo, whomever could you be referring to?

This scene (among others) always makes me smirk because Hojo will disrespect Gast anytime he can.

On one hand, it’s like…come now, you were the cause of his demise. He’s dead. You can let it go.

But on the other, he just won’t die, will he? Because dead men don’t cast shadows.

And yet you just can’t get out of his, can you?

Excuse me, but why isn’t this scene in the show? I need it. 

“She shivered again, and Bellamy slowly unlocked his lips from hers.

"You must be freezing,” he said, rubbing his hands up and down her back.

She cocked her head to the side. “You’re wearing even less clothing than I am.”

Bellamy ran his finger up her arm, then tugged playfully at her damp bra strap. “We can fix that, if it bothers you.”“

- Page 22 of The 100 Day 21. 


This is completely delightful from beginning to end. 

Have a great weekend! 

PS. Our interview with Mark Ronson about Uptown Funk (among other things) 


McSwarek Appreciation Week - Day 2: favorite innuendo

1x12: [Putting on the uniform to get away from your life, makes it a lot harder to take off.] Well, thank you for your concern, but, I have no problem taking it off. I mean… you know what I mean.

Catherine E. Coulson - better known as the Log Lady from Twin Peaks - passed away this morning from cancer. She was 71.

Coulson first worked with David Lynch on Eraserhead, on which she worked as  assistant director, among other behind-the-scenes duties. Lynch then cast her in her most well-known role, The Log Lady, on Twin Peaks.

She played the part again in the prequel film, Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me, and was set to reprise the role in the Twin Peaks revival, which is currently in production. No word on if/how this will effect the series.

Outside of her work with Lynch, Coulson served as assistant camera operator on such films as Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, Opening Night and The Toolbox Murders, and appeared on episodes of Portlandia and Psych.

 I saw someone write in a meta that Sansa misses Winterfest because to her, it symbolises her “lost social status as a lady of an ancient house, her noble blood, not the bastard Alayne that she is forced to pass herself off as” and I feel like the writer of that meta fundamentally misunderstood something about Sansa there.

In the meta, it sounds as if Sansa only starts longing for Winterfell and only longing for her family, the Starks, when she is forced to pass herself of as a bastard girl because she resents the lower social status that this comes with, but I don’t think that’s true at all. When she is forced to marry Tyrion Lannister, for example, she thinks that she is a Stark of Winterfell and can be brave, drawing her strength from her origin.

The meta also uses these lines from AFFC: “I am not your daughter. I am Lord Eddard’s and Lady Catelyn’s. The blood of Winterfell.” to make the point that Sansa wishes to be able to be a noble born woman rather than a bastard and that she secretly resents having to pretend, but these lines are taken out of context. What Sansa resents in this scene is not that she has to pretend to be a bastard daughter, but that she has to pretend to be Littlefinger’s bastard daughter - something that leaves her in Littlefinger’s power and thus, vulnerable to his abusiveness. She doesn’t think of her parents because she resents being treated like a lowborn girl.

Of course, there are other scenes when Sansa thinks of Winterfell and the other Starks, for example when she contemplates whether she should go to the Godswood or not in ACOK or when she remembers the snowfight she and her siblings had while watching the Snow fall in the Eyrie in AFFC. In both cases, when she thinks of Winterfell, the image she produces are that of carelessness:

By now, Arya was safe back in Winterfell, dancing and sewing, playing with Bran and baby Rickon, even riding through the winter town if she liked. Sansa was allowed to go riding, too, but only in the bailey, and it got boring going round in a circle all day. - Sansa, ACOK

She remembered a summer’s snow in Winterfell when Arya and Bran had ambushed her as she had emerged from the keep one morning.  They’d each had a dozen snowballs to hand, and she’d had none. Bran had been perched on the roof of the covered bridge, out of reach, but Sansa had chased Arya through the stables and around the kitchen until both of them were breathless.  She might even have caught her, but she’d slipped on some ice.  Her sister came back to see if she was hurt.  When she said she wasn’t, Arya hit her in the face with another snowball, but Sansa grabbed her leg and pulled her down and was rubbing snow in her hair when Jory came along and pulled them apart, laughing. - Sansa, ASOS

In both of these scenes, Winterfell is presented as a place of carelessness, of laughter and fun and happiness, where children are still allowed to behave like and be children. And in both cases, the situation that Sansa is in is vastly different from the ones she remembers/imagines when thinking of Winterfell - situations that are vastly more complicated.

In the scene from A Clash of Kings, Sansa is lying in bed, trying to decide whether or not she should go to the Godswood of the Red Keep, to which a note has summoned her. She is carefully weighing her options and considering if this could be a trap for her, engineered by Joffrey and/or Cersei, or if there truly is someone wanting to help her escape. In A Storm of Swords, Sansa has already escaped, with the help of Littlefinger, and is now pretending to be Alayne Stone, something that means that she carefully has to consider how she and each and every of her actions could be perceived. The situation in the Vale is also complicated, as Lysa Arryn’s bannermen do not accept Baelish’s marriage and new status as Lord Protector of the Vale, the mountain clans are attacking and some of the older noble families are fighting among each other. In both scenes, Sansa also has no friends, no one she can trust or look to for advice.

This is a stark contrast to how she remembers and imagines Winterfell. In her memories and imaginations, her siblings (and she herself) are safe, protected and happy in their own home. In her own memories of her home, especially in those in A Storm of Swords, Sansa is happy and protected as well, but she is also naive, inexperienced and still convinced that the world is like she was raised to believe it to be. In the same chapter in A Storm of Swords in which Sansa thinks of the snowball fight she had with her siblings, she thinks of this:

She had last seen snow the day she’d left Winterfell. That was a lighter fall than this, she remembered.  Robb had melting flakes in his hair when he hugged me, and the snowball Arya tried to make kept coming apart in her hands. It hurt to remember how happy she had been that morning. Hullen had helped her mount, and she’d ridden out with the snowflakes swirling around her, off to see the great wide world. I thought my song was beginning that day, but it was almost done. - Sansa, ASOS

Again, her memories of Winterfell contrast her current situation - in the Eyrie, Sansa is all alone, her family and most of the Stark men are dead and she has been thorougly disillusioned; in Winterfell, she had her siblings and the Stark men around her, she was happy and she still believed in stories and songs. I personally think that this is what Sansa is longing for, too, when she longs for Winterfell: Not the status of nobility and it’s comforts that it offered her, but the protection and happiness that she experienced there, and the naive view of the world she used to have.