americas player

COOKOUT
  • America: Hey Allen I'm having a cookout! you should come!
  • 2p!America: Love to. I'm a vegetarian though, can i bring veggie burgers? Will the grill have a non meat side? and will there be vegetarian baked beans?
  • America: ... Cookouts cancelled.
  • 2p!America: Seriously?
  • America: Death in the fam.

The unquestioned Black classics in cinema:

Boyz N Da Hood
Menace II Society
Poetic Justice
Friday
Do The Right Thing
Love & Basketball
How High
How Stella Got Her Groove Back
Coming To America
The Wiz
Dolemite
Players Club
Don’t Be A Menace To South Central While Drinking Your Juice In the Hood
Juice
Set It Off
Cooley High
Lean On Me
What’s Love Got To Do With It
Class Act
Lady Sings The Blues
Soul Food
Roots
Waiting To Exhale

The underrated but actually better than all the previously mentioned Black classics in cinema:

X
Fresh
Love Jones
Crooklyn
School Daze
Squeeze
Brown Sugar
South Central
Why Did I Get Married
Eve’s Bayou
The Inkwell
Boomerang
Higher Learning
Jason’s Lyric
The Wood
The Five Heartbeats
Above The Rim
House Party 3
Dead Presidents
Sugar Hill
In Too Deep
Sunset Park
Akeelah & The Bee
New Jersey Drive
He Got Game
Thin Line Between Love And Hate
American Gangster
Amistad
Django Unchained

The hilariously overrated Black classics in cinema:

Belly
Best Man
EVERY OTHER TYLER PERRY MOVIE
ATL
You Got Stomped On The Drumline
Vampire In Brooklyn
Baps
Bad Boys
Tales From the Hood
Pootie Tang
The Barbershop
Hollywood Shuffle
Precious
Get Rich Or Die Tryin
Hustle & Flow
Notorious
Idlewild
Life
Training Day

Feel free to categorize and add any I missed…


…and I’m blocking anybody that mentions Big Mama’s House and/or Soul Plane

APH Canada: Aw, what?! I wanted to be player one!

APH America: Dude, I’m player one. You’re player two.

APH Canada: I don’t wanna be player two! He just digs with the sucky pickaxe. I want the one with the shovel.

APH America: Dude, they’re exactly the same!

APH Canada: Then why don’t you be player two?

APH America: [scoffs] I’m not usin’ that stinky pickaxe.

APH Canada: HAH! SEE?!

Dear Hetalia Fans

This is a plea from me to the rest of the fandom. Please do not bring up today’s political climate in America up to America cosplayers or role-players..or just don’t bring it up period in the fandom. I know there are people who have already done this but please reconsider this, it is not right at all and is most likely going to offend someone. My friend who cosplays America is already fearful of hosting the Hetalia panel she wanted to out of fear of these type of things being brought up. I have seen politics almost tear apart my cosplay group, it was not good. 

So finally for the good of everyone in the Hetalia fandom.  

DO NOT BRING POLITICS INTO HETALIA, ESPECIALLY WITH HOW THE CLIMATE IS NOW IN AMERICA

CHAIR
  • 2p!America: Here he comes! *slaps 2p!Russia* Take that sir! Behold a grown man weeping like a-
  • 2p!Russia: *hits him with a chair*
  • 2p!America: *groans*
  • 2p!Canada: That?! That was your plan?!
  • 2p!America: *sniffles*
  • 2p!Canada: Are you crying?
  • 2p!America: Yes im crying he hit me with a chair!
youtube

“tell mommy i’m sorry this life is a party” 

TEAM MUM
  • 2p!England: You’re not my mum and you are not their mum! *Points to America, Canada, Australia, New Zealand and Sealand*
  • England: I never said I was! Also I'm the wrong gender! *Looks at Australia* Jett, do you think I’m motherly?
  • Australia: Hey, I’m staying out of this one.
  • England: *Looks at America* What do you think, Alfred? Do I act like a mum?
  • America: *Rubs his eye* uh... iggy...
  • England: Stop rubbing your eye and speak clearly when you talk!
  • America: Did you call the doctor and schedule my appointment yet?
  • England: Yes I did but, why do you still want to go to a pediatrician?
  • America: Because a regular doctor doesn’t give me candy at the end. Duh.
  • England: I cant keep doing this, I’m not your mum!
  • America: Well...
  • Canada: You do exhibit rather motherly behavior.
  • New Zealand: So you’re like our mum. Our team mum. Team mum! Team mum! Team mum!
  • England: I’m not the team mum!
  • America, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, Sealand and 2p!England: Team mum! Team mum! Team mum!
  • England: Oliver, why are you chanting?
  • 2p!England: It is a rather catchy chant.
  • *Silence*
  • America: ...Team m-
  • England: One more chant and I will force feed you a scone