Countries as stuff people have said to me at school.
America: When I die, bury me holding a burrito instead of a bouquet.
England: You’re the only person I respect here, everyone else is a thot.
France: This is [name], my bestie! *leans in and whispers* We’re secretly gay for each other, though.
Canada: (Said to him) On the first week of school I thought you were mute!
Russia: Talk. Say something. I want to hear you speak for once.
China: This kid saw some Chinese girl and immediately assumed it was me. I wasn’t even there. Like, bitch, we don’t all look alike.
Germany: Ignore him, he’s just having a stroke.
Italy: In this school, if you’re not gay you’re a minority!
Japan: I set my notification ringtone to “oof” so the Roblox gods will bless me.
Romano: Don’t look at me, we’re not friends anymore! I’m just kidding! No, seriously, we’re not friends anymore, don’t talk to me.