Dear Lois, Fuck You, Love Cat: Part 4

It continues.  The aftermath of their weekend together in National City.

If you want to start from the top, go here



July 2, 1:02 am

I’m writing this now in case we wake up in the morning and it all goes out of my head or else one of us finds a way to ruin everything, which I’d give fifty-fifty odds.  

I’m sitting here on my laptop in the dark, looking at you while you sleep, outlined with the gold of the streetlamps, and I want to remember it.  Just in case this is all I get.  

This was a long day full of strange moments and I’m so exhausted I can’t believe I’m still awake but I feel like if I don’t get some of this out, it’s going to rattle around in my head till the sun comes up.

I’ve never been with someone where it started off so wrong and ended up so right, or where it started off so rough and ended up so tender.  We started with preconceived ideas of what we were supposed to give each other (setting expectations??) and ended understanding what we actually needed, but we had to let go of everything first.  I never took much time before this to consider the distinction between what’s fun to fantasize about versus what I might actually want.  So strange how sometimes they’re not the same thing at all.

So, all those things we said to each other about doing it up against a wall and tearing each other’s clothes off?  God, they were hot.  But having you, actual you, there and breathing and real in front of me, I was surprised to find I didn’t want those things.  And it seems neither did you.  I’m glad we pushed through the head-butting and the awkwardness, and stopped trying to prove something, because what we found on the other side was worth it.  I would trade every minute of those hot, rough fantasies for you the way you were tonight, giving me soft looks, holding my hand while you did those sweet, delicious, gentle things to me.  And the way you whispered my name when you were coming, and you called me “Lo,” …even if it was just for those few moments, you felt open and honest.

I don’t know what’s going to happen and I don’t want to jinx it.

All I know is it was worth the seven hour trip.

But so far, the best part of this trip hasn’t even been the sex.  It was the minute you opened the door and I saw you and realized exactly how much I’d missed your stupid face.

Show me everything, Cat.  Show me National City.  Show me you.  Send me home with a hundred more memories like today.  Yeah, I’m greedy and I don’t care.  I want more, if you’re at all interested in giving it.

Keep reading

5am adventures

Yahabae 5:14 AM

You (kyou) 5:16 AM
Why /the fuck/ are u awake

Yahabae 5:17 AM
Cat woke me up
Why are YOU awake

You 5:17 AM
I’m nocturnal I get a free pass on this
You 5:18 AM
Also insomnia is a bitch

Yahabae 5:18 AM
Wait so you haven’t gone to sleep yet??? Are you going to be okay for morning practice

You 5:20 AM
Stop being such a mom
not like it’s the first time its happened

Yahabae 5:20 AM
We both know Watari is the mom friend but still dude
Yahaba 5:21 AM
At least that explains why you always look tired and pissed off

You 5:22 AM
Fuck off

Yahabae 5:22 AM
Just being honest

You 5:22 AM
Your honesty is not welcome at this time
You 5:23 AM
Anyway why’d you text me instead of going back to sleep? What do you want

Yahabae 5:23 AM
Why do you assume I want something

You 5:23 AM
I know you value your beauty sleep

Yahabae 5:24 AM
well I know something I want that would help me get to sleep faster….
Yahaba 5:24 AM
A pair of big strong arms to hold me tight ;)

You 5:24 AM
do I even want to know
You 5:24 AM
You 5:24 AM
I’m too tired for your sexting nonsense

Yahabae 5:25 AM
Yahabae 5:25 AM
Yahabae 5:26 AM
Yahabae 5:27 AM
but seriously though I kind of do feel like cuddling a bit

You 5:27 AM
you texted me at 5am because you’re lonely and want to be spooned

Yahabae 5:29 AM

Incoming call from “Kentar-Hoe♡”

So,  @my-mind-palace-blog tagged all trans followers so here u go:

Nickname: None

Gender: Male 
Star sign: Taurus

Height: 5′6″

Sexual Orientation: technically pansexual but?? idc
Hogwarts house: Hufflepuff
Favorite colors: All
Favorite animals: oh god don’t make me choose
Time right now: 2:15 am
Cat or dog person: both but I’m allergic to cats
Favorite Fictional Characters: Everyone on Skam and the walking dead 
Number of blankets I sleep with: 2
Favorite Singer/Band: …………………..
Dream trip: I really just want to stay living in New York forever but i guess Norway
Dream job: Artist or someone who helps children out of abusive situations
Current number of followers: 384
When did your blog reach its peak: Idk
Date: 1/14/17
How many blogs do I follow: 1,916
Do I get asks regularly: NOPE 
I tag: @flowerkid-do @softooth @isak-skam-even ummmidk @every-cool-username-is-taken @rykerzanef @cerebellumpunk 

Tag 9 people you want to get to know better

I was tagged by @76bloodytrombones. Thank you!

Relationship status: Single.

Favorite color: Red.

Pets: Two cats: Ned Stark and Luke Skywalker, but I’ve been looking after my nephew’s Jack Russell named Daryl. I’m not sure when my sister’s going to pick him up. It’s been over a year :/

Wake up time: 6:00 AM

Cats or dogs: Cats. Definitely a cat person.

Coke or Pepsi: Neither.

Text or call: Text. But I am lazy with texts.  

Chapstick or lipstick: Lipstick.  

Last song I listened to: On the Bible by Tech N9ne.

I’m tagging: @take94; @atelosx; @stronglikemusic; @itblackgirls; @liberiangirl85; @snakevenom; @infiniteimperfectperfection; @armygirl2003; and @jenashpee-blog