amblack

the constant changing state of us

HOSEOK / J-HOPE / HOBI | BTS
5,176 words | A TRIFECTA (comedy/drama/romance)
featuring bff yoongi
warnings for language

notes: this was supposed to be a short drabble. oops. I hope you enjoy this plebeian way of writing, I can’t bring myself to wax poetic.

Originally posted by nnochu

To everyone, Hoseok smiles and out-shines the sun, his laughter more beautiful than a choir of angels, he carries that spark within, lifting the mood of all around him.

Except me.

To me, Hoseok smiles too easily, as if everything is a comedy show, his laughter shrill and sharp, a terrible cackle akin to nails on a chalkboard. His spark is more like firecrackers–annoying, loud, and not very pretty to look at.

Yeah, fuck that guy.

I spent most of my time avoiding his company like the plague, and the most unfortunate aspect of my life–and there were many of those–had to be the fact that we shared a best friend. How Min Yoongi, all round grumpy-guss and sleepy baby, got along with the human equivalent of microphone feedback, the world may never know.

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New Rules

Word count: 3,452

Warning: smut

Request: Based on ‘New Rules by Dua Lipa’

Another night at the club. Kai has been visiting the same club over and over again, sometimes alone, sometimes with Damon and the rest of the crew, but every night was the same. Coming to the club, drinking until he couldn’t think and then going back home, torturing himself with his own thoughts until he finally managed to fall asleep. Of all the girls that Damon offered Kai to meet them, he rejected almost every single one of them. The ones he agreed to meet, he left alone eventually. He didn’t care about anyone else  because you were the only person he cared about and he let you go, which makes it the biggest mistake in his entire life. He thought he wasn’t worth it and as much as you tried to convince him that he was, he didn’t listen. 

He twirled his fingers around the glass filled with bourbon placed in front of him and his gaze focused on the brown transparent liquid, the light above his head shining down onto his drink.

‘Dude, come and join us! Unless you’re too wasted to do anything right now.’ Damon yelled, trying to overcome the loud music blasting in the club. Kai shook his head and pointed at his glass, smiling for a split second before his face expression went serious again. He was left alone again and for some reason, he looked up and there he saw you, standing with your friends, wearing the dress that he liked the most on you, the one that made you look like his queen and kissed every part of your body perfectly. His face lit up instantly, a big smile illuminating on his face. After two years, his heart still skipped a beat just as the first time he met you. Seeing you had only reminded him what a fool he has been for breaking up with you. To him, you were the most beautiful girl in the world and when you and him were together, he made sure that you knew that. He couldn’t take his eyes off you and has been gathering the courage to approach you, tell you how sorry he was, but when he stood up off the stool, ready to approach you, a guy appeared right beside you, his arm wrapping around your waist and not even a second later, his lips locked with yours. Smile disappeared from Kai’s face, his heart aching from the sight of another man being able to do what he wanted. He ran his fingers furiously through his hair and threw the money on a black bar before he stormed out of the club and back home.

He was sitting in the dark room, curtains closed. The only light in the room was a small lamp, its lightbulb flickering. A glass was resting casually in his hand while his other hand rested under his chin, his thumb brushing his bottom lip. A scene of a different guy having you in his arms felt like torture to him and he couldn’t stop thinking about that or how beautiful you looked everytime you laughed, your dimples becoming more visible or the way you flipped or tucked your hair behind your ear. He drank everything he had in his glass and tapped his fingers on the mahagony table, thinking if it’s the right thing to do, but it didn’t take him too reach out his hand, pick up his laptop as he opened an email and started writing.

3 am

Black heels laying on the bedroom floor, scattered, while the dress was placed neatly on the chair next to your closet. Dimmed light in the bathroom was enough for you, not causing you any headaches, a couple of drinks you had at the club haven’t helped at all either. You wiped your mouth with a towel when you heard a beeping sound on your computer. You peeked from the bathroom, rushing to your laptop as you opened it, new email waiting for you right there. Your eyes went wide as you gasped when you saw who was it from. Malachai Parker. Hesitation took over your body, but somehow, you couldn’t stop yourself from opening it. You swallowed hard and started reading it.

‘Why do you have to be so fucking perfect? I- I saw you tonight. With that guy. I can’t tell you how fucking mad I am. That was supposed to be me, there next to you. I love you and I will always love you. Maybe it’s the alcohol talking, but I love you. It was nice seeing how you became such an independent woman and how after two years, I still have feelings for you. I can’t stop myself from thinking about you and I’ll do anything to get you back.
          - Kai’

Fuck. That was the first thing that popped into your head. You had been thinking about Kai a lot as well. He was your first true love and he was your first in everything. Years you have spent with him were completely magical and it showed you what being in love meant and how can you love someone so much it makes your heart ache. He was your whole world, but for some reason he decided to end it all. You wiped away a single tear that rolled down your cheek, pulling yourself together.

One, don’t pick up the phone
You know he’s only calling 'cause he’s drunk and alone

You jumped at the sound of your phone ringing. The number was familiar and it only made your body shake, but at the same time, you wanted to answer it. You swallowed hard when you figured out who it was and just when you wanted to pick up, your phone stopped ringing but after a few moments, you heard a knock on your front doors. You slowly walked towards the front doors and opened them, only to be faced with your ex lover, looking wasted and with a bottle in his hand.

'Kai? What are you doing here?’ You whispered and hid your body behind the doors, your head the only thing visible to Kai.

'Well, you weren’t answering my calls or my email so I decided to visit you. Can I come in?’ He asked, leaning on the door frame, his breath reeking of alcohol.

Two, don’t let him in
You’ll have to kick him out again

'I don’t think that’s a good idea. I-’

'Please. I- I really need to talk to you. Please, I won’t do anything stupid.’

You hesitated at first, but you had to let him in. It’s not like anything would have happened besides a decent conversation. He plopped himself on the couch, his gaze following your every movement. You sat down next to him and cleared your throat, unsure as to how to start a conversation with him after so long.

'You can’t even look at me, can you?’ His voice cracked as you could hear pain in his voice. He brought the bottle close to his lips, ready to empty it right there. You stopped him and took the bottle from his hands, placing it on the coffee table in front of you. You lifted your head up and locked your eyes with his, earning a small smile from him.

'Of course I can. Why wouldn’t I? No matter how our relationship ended, you are still the only man I have ever loved in my life, but-’

'But not anymore. Got it. Look-’ he cupped your face and came closer, your nose almost touching. You furrowed your brows at his actions, but refused to push him away. Having him so close to your body after a long time felt so calming and so familiar, his hands as warm as you remembered. 'I will never forgive myself for hurting you. I- I was a jerk who couldn’t see farther from his own nose and I hate myself because of it, but you- I need you. You’re mine and I can’t- I can’t just let you go.’ He pressed his forehead on yours and after a few moments, he kissed you deeply, your lips in sync with his just as before. It felt so good to kiss him, his tongue massaging yours so beautifully. It made your heart skip a beat and shivers run down your spine. You were returning the kiss, but not for long as it hit you.

Three, don’t be his friend
You know you’re gonna wake up in his bed in the morning
And if you’re under him, you ain’t getting over him

'Kai.’ You pushed him away, his eyes staring deeply into yours. 'I have a boyfriend. I- I can’t do this, I shouldn’t be doing this!’ You stated and got up as you ran your fingers through your hair, paving around the living room. 'You need to go.’

'Why?’ He asked so innocently, looking like a small child.

'Because- isn’t it obvious? I can’t control myself when I’m around you.’

I keep pushin’ forwards, but he keeps pullin’ me backwards
Now I’m standing back from it, I finally see the pattern
But my love, he doesn’t love me, so I tell myself, I tell myself

'That’s what I wanted to hear.’ He muttered and swiftly got up, alcohol that was running through his body making him trip over his own feet but it didn’t stop him from reaching your body, pushing you against the front door as he placed his knee between your legs, his warm breath washing over your face. You moaned out when you felt his hips pushing forward, locking your body firmly with his, unable to move. Your knees felt like jello and you were dying to kiss him, to feel him again, to memorize every part of his body one more time. He cupped your face with his both hands and smashed his lips with yours, kissing you like his life depended on it. From the moment he kissed you, you knew you wouldn’t be able to resist him but small amount of particles in your body kept pushing you away from him. You pulled away and locked your eyes with his blue ones, showing him a sympathetic look. He sighed deeply and looked down at his feet as he stepped back and shoved his hands into his pockets.

'I understand. Don’t worry, I- I won’t bother you anymore.’ He reached behind you, ready to grab the door knob and let himself out when you grabbed his arm, not wanting him to leave.

'Kai. Please stay with me tonight.’ You whispered, your voice barely audible as if you were scared that he would reject you.

'You don’t have to ask twice.’ A smile flashed on his face, somehow the tension in his shoulders leaving. You intertwined your fingers with his and led him straight to your bedroom and not too far away, you both stepped into the dark room, only moonlight shining through the window and illuminating the dark room. You looked at him and smiled before you laid down under the covers, Kai following you, but before he did, he took his shirt off and his jeans. You swallowed at the sight of seeing him shirtless again, his toned torso completely exposed to your eyes. He climbed onto your bed and covered himself up, his strong arms wrapping around your body and after a long time, you finally felt as if you were home.

'Thanks for staying with me.’ You whispered.

'I’ll always be here if you need me.’ He muttered and kissed your forehead gently as you both drifted off to sleep just like you used to.

One, don’t pick up the phone
You know he’s only calling 'cause he’s drunk and alone
Two, don’t let him in
You’ll have to kick him out again
Three, don’t be his friend
You know you’re gonna wake up in his bed in the morning
And if you’re under him, you ain’t getting over him

6:24 am

Your eyes fluttered open, sun shining through the window as you looked around the room and finally your eyes landed on the one person you have been longing for. You turned around to your side and propped yourself up to get a better look. Kai was facing you, his eyes still closed. He looked so peaceful when he was asleep. He looked so vulnerable and beautiful at the same. You couldn’t stop staring at him and the way a single ray of sunshine shone down on his face. You ran your fingers through his hair softly, remembering how soft his hair felt under your fingertips. You smiled and at that time, your eyes fell down to his lips, admiring how full and pink they looked and you couldn’t stop yourself as you pressed your lips on his. You suddenly felt him returning the kiss as his hands cupped your face and started kissing you deeply and passionately. He pulled away and tucked a lock of hair behind your ear, admiring you.

'You’re just as beautiful as I remember.’ He traced his thumb over your bottom lip, making you close your eyes. His hands found their way to your thighs, lifting you up and placing your right on his crotch, your knees on each side of his body. He caressed your thighs with his hands and stopping on your ass, pushing your hips down even more, earning a quiet moan from you when you felt his lenght underneath you even more. 'I would do anything to make you mine just one more time.’ He trailed off, desperation in his voice. Your started grinding your hips in slow figure eights, Kai’s hands squeezing your waist tightly and pressing you down, following your movements. You didn’t say anything or nod, you only leaned in and kissed his lips passionately, your hips grinding at the same pace, a moan leaving Kai’s body. He reached behind you and tugged at your shirt as he pushed his hands under it, his hands caressing your back before he lifted it up and took your shirt off, throwing it down on the floor.

'I love it when you’re not wearing anything under your shirt.’ He brought his lips closer to your chest and planted dozens of kisses around your breasts before he pinched your nipples, feeling them getting harder under his touch. You threw your head back, your hips grinding on Kai’s crotch faster. 'I can’t wait to be inside you.’ He grabbed your panties and ripped them in two pieces as he traced his fingers through your folds. You moaned out quietly and jolted your hips forward, pushing them against Kai’s hand. You grabbed his hand and roughly pressed his fingers on your clit, circling them around in figure eights. He pushed your hands away, holding them behind your back with his one hand while he kept making circle motions on your clit, picking up his pace gradually. You threw your head back and moaned out loudly, Kai’s lips pressing on your nipple as he started twisting it with his tongue, grazing his teeth against it.

Malachai.’ You moaned out his name as you felt his mouth pulling away from your body and his fingers stopped moving. You swiftly opened your eyes and looked at him, his eyes wide and his breathing turned shallow and fast.

'What?’ You asked befuddledly.

'You know what that does to me.’ He whispered and picked you up with ease and threw you down on the bed. You did know it, but when his full name slipped out, you haven’t thought about it much. Kai always loved when you said his full name during sex. It was a big turn on for him for some reason. He grinded his clothed crotch on your exposed heat, his hard lenght brushing against your clit perfectly.

'Kai, please.’ You begged him, feeling weak and too frustrated. You needed him more than anything, craving for him as your mind went blank, the only thing inside your mind and in front of you was him. He pushed his boxers down his legs, kicking them off on the floor. He pushed your legs further apart, his gaze falling down to your clit. You propped yourself up on your elbows, looking directly at his manhood. You bit your lip at the sight of his hard lenght, just as you remembered. He grabbed his thick shaft with his hand and pumped a couple of times, his pre-cum visible on his tip. He came closer and lifted your hips up, your back now off the bed. He placed his tip between your folds and started circling it around before pressing it on your clit.

'So wet. And all mine.’ He pushed in quickly, filling you up to the hilt. You almost screamed out, his thick shaft streching you out so perfectly. You arched your back and grabbed onto his shoulders, diging your nails into his skin.

'I’ve missed you so much!’ Kai moaned out and placed his head in the crook of your neck, placing a gentle kiss on your collar bone. He slowly withdrew himself and then went back in at the same pace when he first entered you. You could feel his every inch slowly leaving your body and then filling you up again, your walls wrapped tightly around him. His every thrust felt so good but at the same time it felt like torture. His thrusts were rough ad fast, hitting your spot every time as you felt yourself getting closer to your orgasm and Kai knew it when you started clenching around him more frequently as seconds passed.

'Oh fuck!’ You screamed out and felt your body shaking, your orgasm tearing through your body as you grabbed onto the bed sheets tightly, your knuckles turning white. You got down from your high but Kai had no intentions of stopping. He grabbed onto the headboard behind you with both of his hands, thrusting so fast into you that your breath hitched everytime he hit your spot. Suddenly, he pulled out and flipped you over, pressing you harshly down on his hips. You wanted to move but he kept your hips in place with his hands as he started thrusting from underneath you, his length going as deep as possible, your arousal dripping down his shaft and on the bed, his thick shaft sliding easily in and out of you. You bit your lip so hard that it almost started bleeding, trying to suppress your screams but with Kai’s sudden rough thrust, a loud scream escaped your mouth.

'That’s right. Don’t hold back your screams. I love it when you scream my name.’ He groaned out, his hips meeting yours perfectly, an orgasm slowly but so sweetly approaching. You placed your hands on his chest for support and reached down to your clit, rubbing rough circles on your clit as the familiar feeling in the pit of your stomach took over your body one more time. Your limbs went numb and you felt tired, but you knew Kai was far from being done with you. He flipped you over again and climbed on top of you, entering you again swiftly.

'I forgot how good you feel wrapped so nicely around me.’ He whispered in your ear and hooked your leg onto his hip and grabbed the headboard again. 'Fuck.’ Your walls unintentionally clenched around him, triggering his release as he came inside you in a few hot spurts, his grip on the heaboard had gotten so strong that the wood snapped under his grip. He rode out his orgasm and quickly pulled out, his hands lifting you up and placing you on his face, his tongue flickering on your clit, getting your closer and closer to your third orgasm. A small tear rolled down your cheek when you felt yourself coming, your body uncontrollably shaking. You collapsed on the bed, unable to move. Panting was the only sound echoing through the room at that moment, sweat beads visible on your foreheads. Kai looked at you and saw another tear rolling down your cheek.

'Hey.’ He placed a finger on your chin, turning your head to face him. 'Did I hurt you?’ You shook your head and wiped away your tears with the back of your hand.

'You regret this?’ He asked but you shook your head again. You pulled yourself up and locked your lips with his shortly before you wrapped your arms around his body, your head resting on his chest, listening to his heartbeat.

'Just stay with me. Don’t go.’ You whispered and closed your eyes, Kai’s fingers gently drawing invisible patterns on your bare back.

I’m here.

love is coal | the missing pieces

or, an entirely un-necessary  companion in Hobi’s perspective to “the constant changing state of us.” perhaps read that first.

HOSEOK / J-HOPE / HOBI | BTS
3,006 words | A TRIFECTA (comedy/drama/romance)
featuring bff yoongi
warnings for language

in case u wanted more dialogue idk sorry guys

Originally posted by sweaterpawsjimin

Hoseok blinks at Yoongi, the cogs in his head unmoving.

“But she hates me,” he finally says after a long silence.

Yoongi sighs. “No, she doesn’t hate you. I think she thinks she does, but I know she doesn’t. She hates that stupid shit from high school and she holds a grudge like no one else. If she hated you, she’d never even do me the favor of being in your presence when I want to hang out with both of you.”

“She told me my laugh sounds like two pieces of styrofoam squeaking against one another.”

The simile makes Yoongi laugh and roll his eyes. “She’s dramatic.”

“She should have majored in theatre instead of business,” Hoseok responds dryly. “If she doesn’t hate me, I’ll eat my hat.”

“Well, let it be one of your bucket hats, then, you’ve got too many of those.”

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Also just going to put this out there, so you all stop sending me pretty ignorant shit (like asking for a straight perspective on something, I kid you not guys this happened)

I am

  • Black (Biracial)
  • A Genderfluid Dude (They/Them, He/Him)
  • Pansexual (and probably somewhere on the ace-spec)
  • Sex and BDSM/Kink positive, for the most part (I have my squicks and then I have hard nos)
  • Here for my brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers, aunts, and uncles
  • A decent person unless you attack any of the above
  • and still learning to be a better person, always.