amber has no life

dan’s a person that has a rosy patch on his cheek for when he gets excited and a dream journal and slept with a stuffed bear for the majority of his life and has a cool amber lamp and makes self deprecating jokes and spends all his time with the most important person in his life and tries to be vegan for a few weeks at a time and likes boys and wants people to be hydrated and can recite shakespeare and is so very happy

{Special} College!AU Amber
  • major: film production 
  • minor: visual arts
  • sports: she’s on the uni’s women’s basketball team but outside of school she teaches taekwondo to kids !!
  • clubs: aspiring filmmakers society, girls who skate (all female skateboarding team), big brother big sister (she’s the big sister to a 6th grade girl who cut her hair short because amber inspired her), actually amber is in a lot of clubs because she has 4546932 friends and they invite her to all their clubs and she can never say no rofl
  • amber,,,,to put it bluntly is the most popular person on the college campus. like,,,,,,everyone knows who she is everyone from newly entered freshmen to people who graduated like three years ago 
  • why? because she’s so damn bright and positive that it’s hard not to notice her and well,,,,she’s probably the first person to befriend you because she’s just so outgoing and she loves loves LOVES making friends
  • and like amber is friends with jackson who is the other most popular person on campus and the two of them are always outside shooting hoops or being dumb on the quad and like ,,, everyone wants to be their friend because they always look like they’re having fun
  • but amber is also friends with the queen of the campus aka krystal who seems so cold and unapproachable from far away but somehow she’s always managing to smile and laugh around amber
  • and amber,,,,she just has a way of pulling everyone in towards her with an addicting laugh and an adorable smile and just this dorky, lovable personality 
  • she’s a film productions major and like she became passionate about making movies after spending time filming skate videos and vlogs for her youtube channel (which btw is still a thing she does. her vlog ‘ranting monkey’ is insanely popular like she has like 4 million subs and her instagram + twitter is always blowing up and everyone on campus is like HOLY SHIT YOU’RE INTERNET FAMOUS and amber’s like LOL NO IM NOT)
  • but yeah she thought about doing music as a career and learning to become a producer, but she decided that something about film was just more invigorating 
  • and she always has a camera on her and she’s always filming and uploading things
  • like it can go from her just using her phone to film her having lunch with her friends, to her using the gopro to film her and her friends skating, to her lugging around a huge camcorder for a movie she’s making for a class
  • but she’s always alWAYS bustling with energy to film something or take photos of something like she can never stop
  • and everyone she hangs out with somehow inevitably become actors in all her skits and movies 
  • and she’s always posting in the facebook group for the screenwriting majors if anyone wants to work with her for projects and she’s always like juggling 495342 things
  • people are sometimes like “amber, when do you sleep?” and she just shrugs like “i ????? don’t”
  • luna and victoria are always nagging her about staying healthy and amber’s like “ok ok ok ill eat!!!” and then she takes a bite of like luna’s salad and drinks some of victoria’s coffee and is like “see? i just had breakfast!” and they’re like aMBER
  • but it’s too late she’s skated off to her next class
  • she took visual arts as a minor mostly because she wants to be able to create more things on her own for her films because she’s basically a broke college student
  • plus all the friends she made in class all offer to like help her draw sets or make props and through visual art she became close with people in the fashion major 
  • and all of them aDORE her and are always like “if you need help with a movie!!!!! tell us!!!!”
  • and amber only gets shy about things like that, when people are so straightforward with giving her help she’s like you gUYS,,,,,you’re the best but i can’t even pay you???? and they’re like no no we want to do it because you’re amazing
  • and amber like pulls her hood over her face like iM NOT 
  • and it’s like the only time she gets flustered but it is sooooooo adorable
  • also she’s the certified girl crush of literally everyone on campus and it is hilarious because when the uni’s basketball teams have games
  • more girls show up to the women’s game with banners with ambers face on it and poster boards with ‘i love you unnie’ written on them and amber ,,,,,, like,,,,she looks so good in the uniform like ,,,,,, it’s heavenly
  • everyone always takes pics and a freshman even confessed to amber that they had made a photo of amber jumping to dunk their phone background and amber was like DUDE REALLY and they showed her and she like ruffled their hair like IM HONORED
  • that freshmen nearly Died because holyshit amber blessed them with a hair ruffle 
  • the women’s teams coach was like ‘amber we’re going to put your face on the university’s sports homepage ok?’ and amber was like ‘what why’ and everyone was like pointing at her fanclub sitting in the bleachers like thats WHY 
  • some people will sometimes talk about her behind her back because of her easygoing personality around boys and how she dresses and chooses to express herself
  • but like the rumors never go far because anyone that hears someone badmouthing amber will literally stand up for her on the spot because she’s been helpful to so many people and has become friends with even those who have a hard time being social
  • and like literally 99% of the campus has her back
  • and it’s cute she’s kind of oblivious to it because everyone does their best to make sure she doesn’t have to hear any bullshit for the way she lives her life
  • so when someone’s like “god, she’s such a fox hanging around with guys all the time” and amber’s like “who are they talking about?” literally the 10 people around her will be like “oh no one” and then proceed to be like @ the people who were rude like “get a life perhaps?”
  • once amber came into school not wearing her usual skinny jeans, vans, loose shirt combo but came in like a Suit because she was having an important dinner @ the big brother big sister program later
  • and everyone lost their shit. she wore that suit once but she got featured in the school newspaper
  • and amber has a special spot for making films that are like about life and growing up and like learning something about yourself because she really wants to make films that inspire people to be better
  • so all her professional work is always about like,,,,,,,people overcoming tough situations,,,,,,,,and she’s just a sweetheart because she finds people who are quietly struggling and says she wants to make a film about them because their struggle - and their hard work should be recognized and used as motivation for others
  • and for most people hearing someone say that, let alone offer to make a film about it, is really,,,,,,,is really touching because you realize that someone notices your efforts
  • and amber is that person. no matter what - she sees that people are trying, even when it isn’t their best, they’re trying in her eyes
  • but she hardly ever notices that she’s trying 
  • and it’s that about her that you wish you could tell her,,,,,
  • and you do,,,,just not to her face???
  • instead you kinda just comment on her posts with ‘hope you’re eating well!’ ‘i appreciate everything you do!’ and of course ‘i’ll always know you’ll do your best!’
  • and tbh you don’t think much of it,,,because like other people flood her instagram and twitter with comments all the time
  • like as humble as amber is, it’s beyond obvious that she’s famous online and like,,,,,,,the only thing that makes you different from the other 40k comments is the fact that you go to uni with her
  • and you’ve actually spoken to her quite a few times because you work part-time in the uni’s gym so you see amber during basketball practice and she’s always be asking you to help her find her locker key (she has a habit of losing it)
  • and you always help,,,,,,,even if it meant staying 30-40 minutes after your shift was over because like,,,,it’s amber
  • her glowing smile and the cute way she jumps up and down when finally finding the key,,,,,it’s something that would warm your heart for hours after
  • and like most people, developing a crush on amber is pretty much a given,,,,,like it’s impossible not to fall some bit in love with her because she’s all around,,,,,an angel
  • but your crush didn’t even come from the fact that she’s so silly and adorable
  • it came from the moment you saw her sitting in the locker room, drinking energy drinks and obviously fighting to stay awake, talking on the phone and going “yeah im fine, don’t worry i slept!! ill come after practice to help you out - no no i promise im totally awake, ill see you at 9!”
  • and you couldn’t hear what the person on the other line was saying, but amber was telling them over and over that she’d be there after practice
  • and when she’d finished the call, getting up you could see her stumble a bit,,,drained of energy and when she’d walked past you you could even catch the coming in of dark circles under her eyes
  • but when she went back out onto the court, no one else seemed to notice. they all just laughed and patted her on the back and somehow amber managed to smile back and crack jokes
  • and you had wondered to yourself is there was a point that even the most sunny, vibrant people could break and get tired
  • and so,,,,in a way,,,,,you just wanted to support her. even if commenting ‘i hope you get some rest’ on a photo was all you could really do
  • but then,,,,,somehow,,,,,,amber’s finding you after your shift in the gym one day and going 
  • “i see you always working here and i was wondering if i could film you a bit for a movie im doing, it’s about kids who work on campus so im also filming jinyoung from the campus bookstore and jin from the campus new channel, would you be ok with being in it?”
  • and tbh you stand there dumbfounded for like 5 min and amber’s like “heeeey helllloooooo are you listening???” and waving her hand in your face and you’re like UH
  • and you kind of don’t know how to respond because one) you haven’t ever really thought of ever being on camera especially not for something as mundane as working at your uni’s gym two) amber ,,,,, noticed you enough to ask you to be in a film of hers??? and three) being filmed by her,,,,of all people,,,,,,would you even be able to control your blushing face????
  • and you stutter a bit because you’re like “it,,,,,it’s going to be b-boring?” 
  • and amber laughs like “well, that’s kinda the point!! that uni jobs are boring, but like you guys perceiver and pull through to do a job that helps a lot of other students! so dude, are you up for it?”
  • and you don’t even think you say /yes/ but amber is smiling so wide and her eyes are sparkling like stars
  • and you’re sold. you’re done. you’ll do anything for her just about then
  • and you nod 
  • and amber grins and tells you she’ll be back with her camera next week
  • and you stand there for a moment, thinking to yourself,,,,,,,,
  • amber is going to film,,,,,,,,,me,,,,,
  • and for a couple days you think you must have like ???? daydreamed it
  • how could someone so popular, so sociable, and so,,,,,,,,,,so far above you decide suddenly that you - some person who’d just been in the background all the time - be worthy enough to film??/
  • and you know amber loves motivational things and whatnot but your job isn’t anything like that. you work at the gym and do stuff like get towels clean for the athletes and make sure the basketballs are inflated and sometimes clean up garbage off the bleachers 
  • there’s nothing really motivational, you just need the money
  • but then - much to your surprise - amber is there just like she said she would be with a camcorder and a mic and a couple of other people all holding light equipment 
  • and when she sees you, she waves and runs over
  • and it’s like you’re watching it in slow-mo, her bangs brush out of her face as she runs, her smile with the upturned corners of her lips is so distinct and radiant, and most of all her eyes,,,,,pretty big bright pools of brown,,,,,
  • all happy because of you and god your heart would break right there if it wasn’t for the fact that you were scared to death all of a sudden because of everyone else there
  • amber, the least bit bothered by the crowd of her friends, grabs your hand and is like “are you ready?? i want to shoot a short interview with you and ask some questions so i got some people together to help with lighting and one of them is from the fashion dept she can help do your makeup. we’re gonna shoot it here in the locker room, is that cool beans with you?”
  • and you’re like “uhhhhhhh”
  • and amber senses that you’re a Bit shocked and she like slaps your back playfully like “hey, i know it’s all intimidating because woooooah cameras and lights and makeup blah blah blah but it’ll be easy, just trust me ok! i never make things awkward!”
  • with a wink she nudges you forward and you’re like swallowing the lump in your throat like oK ,,,,,
  • and you sit down and suddenly there’s someone putting a mic on you and another person arranging your hair from your face and a voice asking you to close your eyes and your head is spinning but before you close your eyes you see amber from the corner of your eye
  • enthusiastically speaking to someone and she sees you, smiling again
  • and just with that you think - you can do this!!! whatever,,,,,this is ,,,,,,
  • and the interview is pretty short amber just asks how you started working here / why do you work here / and your duties
  • and you’re like “i did it for the money, i need to pay for my own books and stuff so,,,,,”
  • and amber goes “is there any other reason? like once you started working here, did something about helping out all the athletes feel gratifying? like when you hand someone a towel after practice or help the mascot into their costume?”
  • for a second you think you want to just come out and say “no” because this job is what you said before, it’s boring. there’s not big reward, nothing like working at the library or working as a TA
  • but then you look at amber again,,,,,and the moments where you stayed behind with just her to help her find the keys to her locker,,,,the moments where you’d search every corner diligently until you could find the keys that would make the girl you had the biggest crush on jump up and down in happiness
  • and before you know it you go, “there is another reason.”
  • amber’s expression gets bright and she follows up with “what’s that reason?”
  • and now you can’t help but replay all the times you got to be with her in your mind, hearing her complain about how clumsy she is, telling her that it was ok when she apologized for keeping you behind
  • and you,,,,,,,you bite your tongue because you almost say “you’re the reason”
  • but instead you go “someone special,,,,,,someone special is my reason”
  • and amber gives you a thumbs up from behind the camera and claps, saying that that’s the best answer - so touching and that the camera can stop recording and your first shoot is over
  • you sit there, as the hands reappear to take off your mic and clean off the light makeup
  • and amber comes over to tell you you did great, but her voice is fuzzy in your ears and you get up and excuse yourself
  • and as you run from the gym to the dorms you think that,,,,what’s the reason you still work at the gym? what’s the reason you keep cleaning that huge court, picking up garbage from the athletes and from the spectators 
  • you already paid for all your books, you already have your scholarships 
  • “amber” you say outloud,,,,,,and you can’t believe it but maybe your little crush wasn’t so little after all and you recall all the times you would stop to watch her practice, stay behind just in case she lost her keys again, feel sad if she didn’t and then get happy if she did
  • and you squat down in front of the dorm, clutching your hands to your ears and you tell yourself
  • “no, don’t do this. you can’t like her. she’s,,,,,,she’s,,,,,,,,impossible to reach.”
  • “whose impossible to reach?”
  • the voice comes from behind you and were so busy arguing w/yourself in your head that you didn’t even hear someone running after you
  • and you turn around and there’s amber,,,,,this time her smile is faltering into a frown and her eyes are filled with worry and you’re like 
  • oh shit oh shit i didn’t mean to make her worried oh shit oh man oh no
  • and amber gives you a pout that basically lodges a knife into your heart and she’s like “dude you just ran off like the flash and we were all so confused, did something happen? did i do something wrong?”
  • and you’re like “n-no that’s not it it’s just-”
  • and amber steps closer and suddenly she’s only inches away, leaning toward your face and grinning, going “c’mon, tell me. don’t lie too, ill know if you’re lying i have spidey senses”
  • you don’t want to tell her but at the same time you don’t have a choice, if you don’t you’ll just end up being a mess the whole time and ruin her movie so you take a breathe and go
  • “the person who’s impossible to reach is you. the reason i still work at the gym is you. i lik-”
  • you choke a bit on the last word and look down at the ground instead of at amber’s face
  • “i like you.”
  •  it’s silent and you can basically hear yourself screaming in your brain because HERE WE GO MAKING THINGS AWKWARD JUST WHEN THE PERSON OF YOUR DREAMS ACTUALLY MAKES AN ATTEMPT TO BE YOUR FRIEND AND YOU GOTTA GO CONFESS YOUR FEELINGS WOW 
  • but then you hear amber’s laugh
  • the intoxicating, contagious laugh and your eyes widen because it’s even worse than her rejecting you,,,,,she’s straight up making fun of you,,,,,,,
  • and tears start to well up in your eyes because you can’t take this,,,,but then you hear her go “im sorry- im so- sorry i didn’t mean to laugh but you ,,,,,,you looked so scared,,,,like your eyeballs might pop out of your skull and,,,,,oh wait give me a second”
  • and she wipes at her face with the sleeve of her hoodie and she’s like “ok ok, i can talk now phew. ok. well it’s a good thing you like me because guess what?”
  • you don’t look up but amber tilts your chin so you’re forced to
  • and the next thing you know there are soft lips on yours and you’re like HOLY MOTHER OF
  • and amber pulls back before you can actually Faint and proceeds to run around in a circle, crinkling her nose and going “i DID that,,,,,ok ok,,,,,,,,,,,,,,AHHHHHH”
  • and you’re like ???? why are you screaming im the one who just got spontaneously kissed
  • and amber sticks her tongue out and is like yeAH BUT I DID IT I DIDNT THINK I WOULD GOD WE K I S S E D 
  • and you’re like ?????? yeah,,,,,w,,,we kissed?????
  • and amber is like,,,,,,,, still jittering and you’re like ?????? and she’s just like sORRY i just,,,,that was our first kiss it was corny right???? i shouldn’t do that right?????? should i do it again???? let’s do it again ok 3-2-1-
  • and once again there are lips on yours except this time it’s not as shocking, i mean it still is because THE AMBER LIU is kissing you,,,,,,but also like,,,,,
  • she is so cute and embarrassed and it’s obvious she’s still flustered because she isn’t doing anything but pressing her lips  to yours and you’re like,,,,,,,,,ok fine
  • and you tilt your head a bit and move closer
  • and now you’re ACTUALLY kissing
  • but when you pull back amber is red as a cherry,,,,,like more red than you’ve ever seen her and you’re like ??????? are you ok
  • and amber is like iM,,,,,,new,,,,,,to this
  • and you’re like what how you’re so popular haven’t you dated like a bunch of people and she’s like,,,,,,,no,,,,,im not even popular what im just me,,,,,,,,
  • and you’re like omg don’t be cute right now im dying but you’re also like “wait - do you like me too?”
  • and amber looks at you and then pushes your shoulder playfully like DONT MAKE ME SAY IT OUTLOUD,,,,,but yes
  • and you’re like wait hold up wait a minute since when
  • and amber’s like cringing, making noises and she’s like “can we not talk about it,,,,,,,,,it’s so corny,,,,,”
  • and you’re like “i want to know!!!!” and she’s like fiNE
  • so she explains that ever since you first helped her out at the gym,,,,actually ever since she saw you cleaning the bleachers after everyone left she’d always thought it was really cool how hardworking and loyal you were to such like a boring job 
  • and she’s like “you’re really dense, i lost my keys like 10 times in two weeks like that’s humanly impossible i was just trying to find excuses to stay behind with you” and you’re like ihdfglff WHAT
  • and amber is like YEAH DUDE HOW COULD YOU NOT FIGURE THAT OUT
  • and you’re like i just thought you were that clumsy and amber’s like no one is that clumsy not even kids,,,,,and you’re like ok good point but go on
  • and she’s just shrugging like “you’re different from most people, you never make a big show out of like being forced to clean up other peoples messes and you always helped me even when you could say no and i don’t know your face it’s like attractive,,,,like i like it,,,,,,,,i bet my dog and cat would like it too so ,,,,,,,,you know,,,,,,whatever i like you there i said it”
  • and you can’t help but break out into a grin and amber is like 
  • “also maybe i uh made up this film proposition just to get more time with you” 
  • you’re like wait what there isn’t an actual film??? and amber’s like no there IS but,,,,,,it’s all about you im not filming anyone else and you’re like WHaT that’s going to be so boring-
  • and amber is like STOP SAYING YOU’RE BORING YOU’RE NOT
  • but you’re like seriously though,,,,i don’t think there’s enough about my job for a whole movie and amber’s like you’re right,,,,,,i guess the rest of the movie can be about,,,,,,,,,
  • and she steps closer again and you feel her hand on your neck pulling you in again and you’re like,,,,,,,you know what let me just kiss her for now and we’ll figure this out later
  • in the end,,,,,you and amber end up together in your bed,,,,
  • cuddling and watching netflix and amber shows you pics of her pets 
  • and it’s an impromptu first date and amber gets calls from all the people back at the gym and she’s like no im not coming back, leave the footage at my place!!!
  • and then you and her kiss some more and then fall asleep binge watching some anime she couldn’t stop talking about
  • amber decides that she’ll make the movie after all, but instead of it being about you she also does film other on campus student workers
  • but she keeps grumbling about how she could have totally found some way for it to be just about you and you’re like no,,,,you can’t and she’s like trust in my skillz and you’re like why do i like you again and she’s like because i got skillz
  • you actually tell amber that you used to comment on her instagram posts and she’s like SERIOUSLY NO WAY and you’re like “amber, i was your number one fan” and she’s like SHUT UP NOOOOO and you’re like yeah i can show you
  • and she somehow gets so embarrassed by the fact that you like ??? di that and you’re like why and she’s like,,,,,,,,,it’s cheesy don’t and you’re like you know what’s cheesy you still getting up after we kiss and running around because you’re so embarrassed like we’re dating now amber-
  • and she’s like LALALAL I CAN’T HEAR YOU
  • sometimes it is so childish of her but you put up with it because she makes everything better, like your life is just ,,,,,so much more brighter because of her
  • and when she introduces you to everyone as her significant other everyone is in disbelief because they never thought amber would actually like date someone
  • she always seemed so uninterested in relationship like everyone just tells you she concentrated on her work and on hanging out with friends so it’s just ,,,,,,,wild
  • but everyone is nice to you (minus the fanclub who’s like no one is good enough for amber even though you agree with this tbh you’re in shock this is happening, you’ll never be out of shock)
  • but best of all amber is like “no i get to post some couple photos, come here let’s take a photo of us holding hands-”
  • and you’re like “for someone who gets worked up after just kissing, you sure are into romantic stuff aren’t you?” and amber is like STOP ITS FOR THE AESTHETIC
  • and you’re like UHUH
  • all you talk about with each other is memes. you send vines to each other. you also send photos of like you guys doing random crap like squatting in a starbucks or trying to pet a random dog while the owner isn’t looking
  • amber starts a vlog answering questions and there’s so many about you that she does a ‘ask my s/o questions’ tag video and you’re like,,,,,awkwardly there but then someone is like “what do you love most about amber?”
  • and you talk for like a good 30 min while amber flails her arms in the back and rolls around on the bed and runs in and out of the room in embarrassment 
  • and pda for her is like a,,,,,,,it’s like she cannot do it
  • like you kissed her cheek while you were out w some of her film friends and she dropped the taco she was eating
  • and that’s like,,,,,,,crazy because amber lives for tacos,,,,,,yet she just dropped it right all over her lap and you were like ,,,,,,,oh no and the entire table broke out into laughter until amber came to her sense and threatened to delete editing softwares off their laptops if they didn’t stop 
  • she skates everywhere and sometimes she’ll skate away and make you jog to keep up and you’re like i swear im just going to buy a scooter one day or something
  • (for your first anniversary she gets you a freakin scooter)
  • she has a horrible habit of taking photos of you sleeping and posting them like everywhere with captions about how you’re not getting any work done
  • you get revenge by taking photos of her drooling in her sleep
  • you go with her to get another tattoo and she’s like trying to get you to get one and you’re like iffy about it and then the artist is like “you should get ambers name in a heart” and both you and amber are like WAHGTGGF
  • you once were like getting really into it with her in the locker rooms when everyone was gone but then,,,,,her phone rang and it was,,,,,the goddamn trolololo song and you were like AMBER THIS ISNT 2006 and she was like GOOD MEMES NEVER DIE 
  • after learning she teaches taekwondo to kids and meeting her little sister from the big brother/big sister program and just seeing how well she does with kids you were like 
  • ‘mom amber is a cute concept’ and she was like ‘what’ and you were like (———: you heard me
  • tries to deny the fact that she’s great with kids but like,,,,,,,how can you deny it she’s literally an excitable five year old sometimes it’s not wonder she’s so good with them
  • finally finishes editing the film about you and the other uni student workers and you guys watch it on her laptop at like 3 am via skype because you’re the first person she wanted to show it to
  • and when she’s like “is it ok????”
  • you’re like, half asleep and like “why do i have pimple in the beginning of the movie” and she’s like “THAT DOESN’T HELP ME” and you’re like “i loved it, you’re amazing id kiss you to prove it if you were here” and she rolls her eyes like don’t
  • but she’s really really proud that you liked it
  • you befriend luna, krystal, and victoria really fast because you’re always worried about ambers health and you tell them about that time in the locker room when you though amber was going to pass out but she still agreed to help her friend
  • and you four are like “we need to protect her. she’s too nice for her own good”
  • krystal: more like she’s too airheaded for her own good
  • amber: i AM NOT AIR- OMG look a dog,,,,,im gonna go pet it
  • jokes but honestly she really does need you guys to keep her in check because she always has so much on her plate with all her friends and all her schoolwork
  • that sometimes you have to be like ‘amber, we’re going on a date’ and she’s like omg we are and you’re like yeah a nap date come over and get some SLEEP 
5

Max Caulfield - DAISY sympathy, rememberance, and success

Chloe Price - ANEMONE fading hope and a feeling of having been forsaken

Victoria Chase - BLACK ROSE hatred, beauty and insecurity

Kate Marsh - PEONIES bashfulnes, compassion, refinement and femininity

Rachel Amber - MOON FLOWER anticipation, represents the two moon

The ladies of Arcadia Bay.

I’m tagging the ships just so its filled with positive vibe instead of hate :*
6
HOLY SHIT WE CAN SAVE RACHEL AMBER.

DID ANYBODY POINT THIS OUT YET??

So it’s not confirmed that the doe is Rachel Amber/Rachel’s spirit animal/etc, but people are speculating that it /is/ based on the clues given. The fact that it disappears after they find Rachel’s body, and the fact that it’s standing where Rachel is buried when you see it in Episode 2 is making lots of people believe that the deer is a spirit of Rachel in some way.

In episodes 2-4, whenever you see the deer, it’s a ghost. You can’t take a photo of it, and only Max can see it. It’s not actually there.If you take the Rachel being the doe theory, it makes sense that the deer is a ghost because Rachel is already dead.

HOWEVER.

At the end of episode 1, right at the beginning of the cutscene when you follow Chloe up to the lighthouse, what do we see?

A deer.

An alive deer.

It’s solid. It doesn’t have a ghostly fade. It makes the leaves rustle so we know it’s alive.

What if that means Rachel is still alive when Episode 1 takes place?

What if we can go back to that day and save her from being killed since we know where she’s being held now??

  • chloe: *takes a deep breath*
  • chloe: i wi-
  • anyone who has spent five seconds around chloe ever: yes, you wish rachel was here, we know, you wish rachel was here so much, she's the light of your life, you want her here so much, you just want rachel- we KNOW, you wish rachel was here you fucking wish rachel was here ok we know, we get it, YOU WISH RACHEL WAS HERE. WE GET IT.

i don’t think you will understand how much i love amber liu of f(x). she is my queen and all i want for her is happiness and contentment in life. pls love and protect amber. she has the kindest heart, with such a selfless and humble soul. she loves her sunbaes and hoobaes equally, and is so welcoming to everyone. she is proud of her friends achievements and you can be damn sure she’s their biggest fan. she breaks korean norms and is praised and loved for it because people genuinely like and care for her. she’s funny, silly, and playful. she can be serious and honest. honestly this woman is so beautiful on the inside it radiates out from her and is so contagious. pls protect my queen.

Okay. But can we just take a moment to appreciate Brittany Snow in Hairspray... There's something I wanna analyse.

See Amber is this mega bitch, right? But maybe she really wasn’t. We can see how much her mom influences her, right? She controls her life and her career and Amber has to go along with it because she never truly has a say in anything. We don’t see a father, so her mom is the only person who is capable of bringing her up. There are no siblings in the picture either.

What if Amber wasn’t always bitch? What if she was as open and loving as Chloe Beale, but the loss of her father, (I’m assuming that part in the film was accurate), physically broke her and her mom was the only person who could pick up the pieces? She closed off her heart and built walls around it because perhaps her father was the only person who accepted her for who she was.

See, Amber is actually nothing like her mother. Her mother insults people because it brings her great pleasure to be the dominant person and see that people know that they are inferior to her. And yet, when Amber was next to her mother when insulting Tracey and her own mother, she constantly looked towards her mother… as if reassuring herself that this is the person her mother wished her to be and that this is what would make her mother proud of her. She was not taught to stand up for herself, only to guarantee her superiority to others.

See, you’re asking yourself “but what about her reaction to Tracey’s desire of ‘Integration of colour’ or her reaction to Tracey or anyone else deemed not worthy to be on the show”, right? It’s simple. That’s how her mother would have reacted, and in fact, how she did react. Her mother would have brought to her up to standards and beliefs, and here is someone who has gone against everything her mother taught her… of course she will be shocked. No one has defied her mother before, how is she supposed to know that she is in the wrong?

She’s popular, yes; she was on the arm of the most popular guy, yes… but she, unlike her mom, was capable of changing towards the end. She stood up for herself. She was sick of being controlled.

And that is the difference. Her mother will never be able to change; Amber was and did. And that is why I think Britt was perfect for the role, it shows how much people can overcome to see and do what is right over what is easy.

‘in the name of my uncle and the sort of mafia that i swear i assembled completely by accident i will punish you’

did somebody say magical girl hank

its 4am ok dont judge me

  • Chloe: *takes a deep breath*
  • Chloe: i wi-
  • Max: yes, you wish rachel amber was here, we know, you wish rachel amber was here so much, she's the light of your life, you wish she was here so much, you just wish rachel amber was here- we KNOW, you wish rachel amber was here you fucking wish Rachel Amber was here ok we know, we get it, YOU WISH RACHEL AMBER WAS HERE. WE GET IT.

at their wedding, chloe gives this extremely passionate, heartfelt, sarcastic and sassy speech about what it’s like to have max in her life. she’s got the audience laughing, and max is beside her, holding her hand and laughing too, but also crying bc they’ve been through so much shit to get to this point.

then at the end of her speech chloe goes, “i just wish rachel were here to see this… the happiest moment of my life. i know she would’ve wanted to.. she never told me but.. i think it was her dream to see me find a real reason to smile.”

she breaks down after that and the whole audience goes quiet as max wraps her new bride in a tight hug. chloe’s cries echo into the microphone before kate comes and leads people in a time of silence for rachel amber.