can you show me how to get to sesame Street?
wait until 11:11, Close your eyes, spin around five times, hit the pinata, and when all the candy comes pouring out just run straight through it.
once you're through, you'll meet a Llama named Amber. Give Amber $20 and a apple and she'll take you to Narnia, where you'll find $5 on the ground.
use this money to get to hogwarts express where you will meet up with Skrillex who will give you a map which will lead you to a year with journey through the Australian outback and once you're completely lost, you will stumble upon good old sesame street. Good luck and have fun!
Gryffindor: staring at the ceiling in the middle of the night when you can’t sleep. Going one mile above the speed limit. Just barely breaking the law. Cold showers. Damp hair. waking up 3 minutes before your alarm goes off. torn up sneakers. cracked sidewalks. driving up the hill at 11 pm at night, all the windows down, blasting music. scratch marks.
Ravenclaw: Ink-stained hands. Sitting in bed wearing nothing but an oversized t-shirt and underwear. Mint toothpaste. Drinking orange juice after brushing your teeth. Stubbed toes. Ballet flats that just barely pinch your feet. the feeling that you need to sneeze but can’t. Lemon juice. paper cuts. chapstick. chipped nail polish.
Hufflepuff: Dressing like a badass so no one thinks they can walk all over you. Doc Martens, Dark hair, Dark makeup. Flannels. Fuzzy socks. Only wearing one sock. Hot coffee with cold milk. Records that are covered in dust. Earbuds with one side broken. Airplanes. Cussing to look tough. Skinned knees. Rug burns.
Slytherin: Warm showers. Conditioner running between your fingers. the smell of curling irons and hair spray. Deflated playground balls. giggles. winged eyeliner. light lipsticks. arm wrestling matches. the cold floors of public schools. Morning breathe. Apple cider. ambers slowly dying in the ashes of a fire. lake water. freshly painted toes.
I feel like American social conservatives used to sell a certain trade-off to justify bigotry. It wasn’t one I agreed with, but it was one I could kind of understand.
There was this ideal of a Mayberry America–a land of prosperous small towns where everyone lives in 2.7-child families with a skilled-tradesman father and stay-at-home mother, every family in town turns up to the 4th of July barbecue, and Jesus Flag Apple Pie Amber Waves Of Grain.
Mayberry America isn’t a good thing; the whole image is conspicuously and intentionally exclusive of LGBTQ people, non-white people, non-Christian people, disabled people, and anyone who doesn’t want a social role so prescriptive that Brave New World seems like anarchy. But you can kind of see the appeal. You can see how for a certain type of person how it might give them warm and fuzzy feelings, how it might be their hope for the country.
But now I feel like even that hope has disappeared. The pretext of “we have to be cruel because Mayberry only works if everyone fits in” is gone and replaced with cruelty in a vacuum. People who have no interest in a traditional nuclear family are still homophobic anyway. People who have no Christian faith or community still hate Muslims and Jews. “A women’s place is in the home” misogyny has given way to “grab them by the pussy” misogyny.
Even as someone who had no place in Mayberry to begin with, I find this disheartening.
I…did a thing. A silly thing. I came up with perfume concepts based on WoW lore characters. AHEM. I would wear the heck out of some of these (mostly Deathwing, Nozdormu, and Lady Liadrin)
Varian Wrynn - Polished steel, brown leather, animalic skin musk, and the faint memory of lost innocence - a drop of white honey.
Thrall - Wind, water, earth, and fire: Lightning-charged wind and salty sea water, aged patchouli, and campfire smoke.
Garrosh Hellscream - Self-righteous anger: Red musk, rough leather, and bitter clove with smoky vetiver, dragon’s blood, and the blackened, murky corruption of opium.
The Dark Lady, Sylvanas Windrunner - Ghost-white grave blooms, melancholy indigo musk, worn leather, wooden arrow shafts, and a drop of red-hot cinnamon.
Vol'jin - Lush, tropical blooms and warm seawater, with a touch of burning pitch, hemp-infused patchouli, and oily war paint.
Tyrande Whisperwind - Ancient oak forests and green moss, blue lotus, and delicate white gardenia.
Illidan Stormrage - Corrupted, mutated, and exceedingly sensual: swirling opium, black anise, and black musk shot through with electrically-charged lime.
Khadgar - A sassy, gentlemanly lilac and bergamot fougere atop magical frankincense and red wine.
The Lich King, Arthas Menethil - Freezing sleet and thick snow atop black stone, black leather, and cold, blood-spattered metal.
Lady Liadrin - Warm, honeyed amber, bourbon vanilla, earthy fig, and a touch of penitent church incense.
The Naaru - Golden light: crystalline white musk, sugared lemon, white lilies, white honey, vanillic sandalwood, golden amber, and a little zing of mint.
Chen Stormstout - A barrel of ale, a straw hat, a bamboo staff, fuzzy musk, and raw sugarcane.
Brann Bronzebeard - Aged Dwarven whiskey, thick musk, raw ginger, brown leather, earthy vetiver, and hot stone.
Murloc - Slimy green kelp, green vegetal musk, cold, salty seawater, and briny driftwood.
Queen Azshara - Unmatched beauty marred by fathomless hedonism, cruelty, and corruption: Night-blooming cereus and honeysuckle, black lotus, myrrh, pinot noir, indigo musk, blackened opium, ambergris accord, black plum, and deep red rose.
Jaina Proudmoore - Pink tea rose, sweet cream, crisp white linen, white pepper, and razor-sharp slivers of ice.
The Dragon Aspects
Deathwing, The Destroyer - Anger, insanity, and hatred: Fire and brimstone, hot leather, charred wood ash, clove-infused dragon’s blood, red musk, and the maddeningly sweet whispers of long-buried ancient things: touches of cocoa and wispy incense.
Ysera, Guardian of the Emerald Dream - Fir needles, pine pitch, oakmoss, myrtle leaf, jasmine leaf, hyacinth blooms, blue musk, mushroom caps, and aged patchouli.
Alexstrasza, the Life Binder - Warm, comforting red leather, golden amber, apple blossom, dragon’s blood resin, red rose, blood orange, and juicy pomegranate.
Nozdormu, the Keeper of Time - Swirling, hot desert sand, soft brown leather, tobacco, ancient sandalwood incense, black pepper, smoky vetiver, and glittering white musk and lime.
Today’s lunch (vegan, high carb, low fat): 3 fresh local organic apples topped with a bit of fresh lemon juice and cinnamon for some xmas-holidays-winter-mood. Keeps me energized the whole day because of the high amount of vitamin A, B and C. There’s a reason why “An apple a day keeps the doctor away” exists - so why not 3 apples for lunch? Have a wonderful day, don’t forget to eat nature’s medicine today to strengthen your immune system, xx Amber
Cataglottism - Kissing with tongue, FenHawke (please make it super fluffy and a bit smutty after Act 3? I love your fic, I hope you'll finish it! )
Thanks! I probably will finish it. sometimes? eh.
Amber Orange, six dwarves, one elf and a prince nobody asked for.
“Hawke, wake up,” said Fenris’ voice softly into her ear.
“Nrgh,”she growled without waking up and confrontationally bumped her cheek against his, as his chin rested on her shoulder.
“Eloquent as always,” she could feel his lips grinning against her skin.
“Mhm, please”, she pleaded, turned around and curved against him, hiding her face in the crook of his neck.
“I would comply gladly,” he said against her temple, voice soft and deep, his arms circling around her, so she felt herself melting in the warmth and drifting into the dreams again, when he raised his voice with the tone of amusement, “but this evening you told me in no uncertain terms that I, - and I quote here, - “should not be such a softie” and stop listening to your pleas.”
Still mostly asleep, she found a familiar hollow of his throat with her lips and kissed it softly, feeling the steady pulse under his skin. “Darling, just a little longer…”
“You also told me to remove the blanket if you don’t react.”
What a betrayal, she thought, waking up. I kiss his collarbones and he threatens to take away my blanket. This calls for a retribution.