Law and Order: SVU
Olivia Benson: U have to testify
Fin Tutuola: I came from narcotics
Amanda Rollins: Back in Atlanta…
Elliot Stabler: I hate pedophiles
John Munch: The government has been keeping tabs
Captain Cragen: Liv, Elliot, my office. Now.
Melinda Warner: blunt force trauma to the head
Rafael Barba: Not enough evidence
Nick Amaro: Hola
Victim: Im not testifying

An Updated SVU Drinking Game

(just for funsies)

Take a sip when
the dun-dun plays
Barba’s tie is a different pattern from his shirt
Carisi smiles at someone
Carisi gets emotional
Barba has a pocket handkerchief that’s coordinated with the rest of his outfit
Someone asks Rollins about her baby (x2 if they point out that “motherhood should have her mellowed out” and x3 if the comment is work-related)
Catholics
Carisi mentions one of his sisters
You remember that Amaro isn’t there and you miss him

Take a shot when
statutory
a prominent political figure is the perp
Barba talks really fast for a really long time and you don’t quite know what’s going on
Benson and Rollins side with the female rape victim (take another shot when the boys are finally convinced)
Ice-T is shocked by the depravity of a crime even though he’s been in SVU for centuries (x2 if he says “that’s messed up”)
Carisi tries to be a lawyer
One of the gang has a “when I lived in the projects” moment
The crime is taken straight from the headlines (but totally fictional, right?)

Finish your drink when
Barba speaks Spanish
the perp is a priest
Carisi brings everyone Italian food
Barba admits that Carisi is right
Dick joke
Rollins goes rogue
Benson is held hostage
the entire SVU department is investigated
“That’s why I joined SVU.“
someone accidentally shoots an unarmed black man

6

“I always say each character in SVU is a chess piece on a board and you have to know how to play us. We have specific skills that our characters are really good at doing for a story. It was about making moves in the best possible way.” -  Raúl Esparza (x)

What I want to happen on season 18 of SVU:

In season 1, a psychiatrist came in to evaluate the squad, to see if any of them were close to having a mental breakdown (Det. Jefferies). They do that this season, since the squad recently lost one of their own (Dodds), they’re short-staffed, and there’s two single (new) mothers.  

We get to see each squad members’ session. Amanda is struggling with her sister and being a new mom. Carisi is struggling with his near-death experience, and with his sexuality (him being Catholic). Fin is struggling with being the only detective without a ‘life’, since his son’s surrogate had a miscarriage. Liv’s we don’t see. 

The psychiatrist says that there is someone that needs to take time off until a psychiatrist says they are ready to go back. Amanda and Sonny panic. Fin doesn’t show his panic. The three of them sit in the break room, and try to figure out who’s getting kicked out. They end up telling each other what they talked about in their sessions. They support and validate each other.  

Which squad member is the one getting forced time off? Benson. Because she has developed an alcohol dependency and still has PTSD, and can’t seem to form a boundary between work and home life. The squad is shocked. Declan Murphy takes Benson’s place. There’s a showdown being Murphy and Carisi, Carisi is pissed at Declan for pistol-whipping him. Murphy is pissed because he knows more about Jesse. Barba gets his spine back and doesn’t take every single case to court. He goes back to teasing Carisi. 

Mike Dodds comes back from the dead. The guy they thought was Mike Dodds was a UC, because Dodds was doing some secret anti-terrorism thing. Nick Amaro moves back to NYC because California ran out of water. 

NBC should just hire me. (Should I write the fanfic???)