amanda is the cutest

I remember being really worried when the Rowdy 3 broke into Todd’s apartment and stole the picture of Amanda, when I saw Martin staring at the picture I remember literally saying ‘Oh shit’ out loud because I was very unsure of them as characters. I had no idea what they were going to do. All I knew was that they liked to destroy stuff and attack the precious ray of sunshine that is Dirk Gently. So my immediate reaction to them being outside Amanda’s house was fear based on their actions and what normally happens to females on TV shows - they become plot points to further a male’s pain. But then you find out that all they want is to be her friend and protect her. And like now when I re-watch those scenes I’m like look at how cute they all are wrecking up Todd’s apartment! And Martin looking at the picture is like ‘awww he thinks she’s cute’. And don’t get me started on the brick that say’s ‘hi’. Like that is the cutest, slightly threatening shit ever. 

New Girl - Ten (FINAL)

One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight | Nine


I stretched out in the bed, my toes peeking out of the blanket and my fingers brushing against the headboard. I tilted my head slightly to the left, feeling an arm tighten around my waist. I let out a small yawn and scooted a little bit closer to the warmer body. “Hey,” I whispered, poking his cheek. Nothing. “Hey,” I tried again, dragging the word a little longer. This time, I got a hint of a smile, causing a smile to appear on my face, too. “Wake up,” he shook his head, pulling me closer. “C’mon, I miss those pretty brown eyes.” He let out a chuckle and opened one eye. “You’re getting closer.” He moved his head away from the pillow slightly, opening the other eye, his smile widening.

“Happy?” Tom teased, pulling up the blanket and wrapping it tighter around us, forcing me to shift so my chin was resting on his chest, so I could look up at him.

“Hm,” I brought a hand up to his cheek, “ecstatic.” He shook his head, leaning in and kissing my forehead.

“Nerd,” he murmured, his lips still pressed to my forehead. He groaned after seeing the clock on my bedside table. “It’s so early.” I rolled my eyes.

“Tom, it’s almost eleven.”

Only?” He laughed at my expression, pinching my cheek lightly. “I guess since I’m up, I’ll go shower.” He sat up and stretched, I pinched my nose playfully and fanned my hand in between us.

“Good, I wasn’t gonna say anything, but,” he turned to look at me, a feigned shocked expression on his face.

“You’re so fucking rude,” he lifted his shirt off and threw it at me, causing me to laugh. “Hey,” I removed the shirt from my head and tried to pat down the strands sticking out before looking up at him.

“Yeah?” He leaned on the bed, his arms supporting his weight as he hovered over me.

“Good morning,” he whispered, kissing me softly. When he pulled away we smiled at each other. He pulled away completely and walked toward the door, sending me a wink on his way out. When I heard the bathroom door close down the hall, I let out a content sigh, getting out of bed and pulling on the pair of shorts I tossed on the floor last night. I walked out of my room and into the kitchen, catching Zendaya walking out of Harrison’s room at the same time. She hadn’t heard me walk in yet, seeing as she still thought she was successfully sneaking out.

“When did this happen again?” She jumped slightly, placing a hand on her chest and tried to regulate her breathing.

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Okay, TBH Dirk Gently has the most awesome depictions of friendship and people in general I’ve ever seen, and here’s why -
They show us that Bart kills people and doesn’t care, by movie/tv law she should “logically” be the bad guy, and ditto for Ken. But they’re not. They’re both super cute and sweet (*cough* and totally shippable *cough*), but that doesn’t stop Bart from killing, she doesn’t end the series a reformed person. She’s just better.

Amanda is the character who could easily be pitiable, her whole struggle is battling her disease. But she gets rid of her scary hallucinations in a couple episodes, and her real development is that she learns that just because someone is family, doesn’t make them worth your time and just because someone isn’t traditionally nice or because they’re not an angel on your shoulder doesn’t mean they won’t look out for you or that you can’t make your own choices. The Rowdy Three are the cutest lil shits too. Not just with Amanda, but they are overprotective and close - not family, again. In DGHDA, ohana doesn’t mean jack. It’s the people you choose who’re important.

Farah, Dirk and Todd are also such great characters. None of them are perfect, and you could even say, as with Bart and Ken, that they’re objectively bad. But they’re all still standing, and they all feel real. It’s a testament to the actors and the writing that these characters, despite being very flawed, are likeable. They are sweet, they are funny, they are the sort of people we would love to know in real life. This is why I love Dirk Gently, because it can show how important friendships are and how unimportant what you’ve done in the past is to that, and I think that this will forever hold a place in my heart for that.

more baby Amanda because baby Amanda is adorable.

So, some facts:

  • Her full name is S'chn T'gai Amanda Uhura
  • her favorite uncle is Uncle Jim, because he sneaks her candy under the table sometimes and tells the best stories
  • she refuses to call Dr. Mccoy “uncle”, for reasons unknown (much to his chagrin), but she does end up calling him “Dr. Bones” and he’s mostly okay with that because he thinks she’s the cutest thing since peach pie and would probably give up a limb for her, but don’t you dare tell Spock I said that, Jim.
  • She speaks Swahili with her Mama and Vulcan with her Baba and Standard with Uncle Jim and Doctor Bones, but Mr. Chekov is teaching her bits of Russian and Mr. Sulu is teaching her bits of Japanese so that’s pretty cool
  • She is a veritable fountain of quirky little facts and figures and will follow you around telling you them, like “were you aware that the Klingon Revolution of the stardate 1344.57 was instigated by Major General Khor Ta because of an insufficient distribution of Fillenese melons on the Klingon capital?” or “the consecutive sum of the numbers 233490945 through 495684564564 is …” or “if you stand upside-down and suddenly sneeze, your retinas may tear out of your occipital region”
  • She takes to following different members of the crew around to learn about their professions and one time she spends a whole afternoon in sick bay with Bones, sorting all the hypos with colour coded glitterly stickers
  • It’s actually supremely useful
  • Bones lets her help with little things like that around sick bay all the time from then on
  • the nurses adore her
  • Her favorite subject is mathematics
  • Her second favorite subject is history (of mathematics)
  • One time she challenged Uncle Jim to a chess game
  • he won, but she still had lots of fun
  • “Uncle Jim” she said afterwards, “you did not use a conventional approach to obtaining a checkmate against my king”. “No,” says Jim, amused. “I bluffed.” Amanda purses her lips and stares at the chessboard. “I see.” “Hey, kiddo,” says Jim. “You’ll win next time.” “No,” disagrees Amanda. “You are at a higher skill level than I am due to years of experience.” she pauses. “could you teach me how to bluff?”
  • Jim grins
  • Amanda frequently partakes in Jim and Nyota’s ultimate scrabble battles by sitting in her father’s lap and suggesting words.
  • She’s on Uncle Jim’s team, and Baba is on Mama’s team.
  • One time, they actually beat Mama and Baba
  • Uncle JIm gloated about it for weeks
  • It was kind of funny
  • Also her hair is always done up in cute little braids because her mother is a whiz with braiding hair

(whispers thanks to Psi for headcanoning with me xoxo)

Girl’s talk boy’s! Calum

Words: 2.4k

Warning: smut

Lyric: Do you say that I’m a sweetheart?
Do you say that I’m a freak?

Masterlist

“How do you even afford this type of wine, Y/N?!” My friend, Amanda scoffs throwing her head back to drink the last of her wine.

“Because she works her ass off, unlike you.” Grace, my best friend smiled sarcastically at her. Amanda opened her mouth to spit something back at her but backed out when Grace cocked her eyebrow with a ‘don’t even try me bitch’ look.

“Just drink the bloody wine,” I laughed, shaking my head at them as Yasmine dropped her legs in my lap. Me and my three best friends did this once a month just a girly night. We didn’t get to see each other much due to work and priorities. Amanda had a small child, Liam he was the cutest. Me and Grace met when we were 8 and I’ve watched her grown from a nerdy chubby girl who was insecure about herself to a beautiful curvy woman with a husband, Chae he was good to her and a nice man. Yasmin became friends with me and Grace when we were 12 and starting high school. She had bright pink hair and no friends from her junior school. So me and Grace took her under our wing and became great friends, now her pink hair was blonde and had grown out, she wasn’t married but her girlfriend Becky and her are off to travel the world.

Amanda and I met when we were 16, she had moved schools coming from a very posh family. She was by far the bitchiest and snobbiest. Although we loved her very much when she was being nice(which is very rare). Today though it seemed Amanda was cranky, maybe Liam had kept her up all night. Who knows, she’s not a very feelings person.

“So, Miss Y/L/N, what’s going on in the land of Calum and Y/N?” Yasmine smiled sweetly, putting her wine glass on the coffee table. Grace tucked her feet under herself and Amanda muffled her groan and leaning back on the worn out sofa across from the three of us.

“It’s amazing he’s the sweetest” I smiled my mind wandering to Calum, he was the best boyfriend I could have asked for. We had been dating three years and he was my first and only love. I was a stubborn bitch back then, when it came down to things and I had my walls up. But as soon as I met Calum I let him in and it was the best decision of my life. Currently he was probably working out down in the basement, he had his own mini gym. 

“When are you getting married?” Yasmin laughed. I shook my head knowing that Calum didn’t believe in marriage and that it would never happen no matter how much I wanted these three girls to be my bridesmaids. I smiled at Grace, she knew why I wouldn’t answer I told her everything. 

“What’s the sex like? That man is gorgeous” Grace half moaned, rolling her eyes back. Yasmin laughed along with her, giving her a gentle push to her shoulder and looked at me.

“That’s none of your business” I grinned, drinking down some of the wine. The bitter taste bubbling on my tongue. I heard Amanda laugh half heartedly and her hair was being flicked over her shoulder. 

“Calum’s too sweet, does he even satisfy you? You look like you haven’t been fucked in a couple of years” Amanda chuckled, holding her bony hand to her chest and giving me a fake sympathetic look. I puckered my lip and furrowed my eyebrows. 

“No he’s a freak in the sheet’s. Trust me I’ve been fucked thoroughly in every part of this house. Even the seat you’re sitting on.” I snarled. Yasmin and Grace both choked on there wine, spluttering it all over there shirts. Amanda gave me a glare, standing up from the chair and sipping on her wine. I looked over to the door seeing Calum appear. He was wearing his black sweats low against his hip, showing off his slight v-line. His muscular arms were folded against his chest. His toned body was covered in sweat probably due to him been working out, the shininess making his body glimmer. His hair was all ruffled, curls hanging loose over his forehead and there was a massive smirk plastered on his lips. His eyes landed on mine as he sent a wink in my direction. 

“Hello ladies” Calum said, smiling at them. The three girls all said hello back politely and Amanda awkwardly sat on the corner of the chair she was sitting on. Calum tucked his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants and walked forward slyly. 

“Sorry to cut this short girls, but I think me and Y/N need some alone time” He said shrugging his shoulders. Grace and Yasmin stood up giggling placing there glasses on the table. Amanda did the same but with a scowl on her face then walking past me pushing past Grace. She just laughed as Yasmin winked at me following Amanda out the house. 

“Have fun” Grace whispered walking away. I waited a few seconds before hearing the front door slam. I turned my head towards Calum who was now stood over me. I sat up straight pulling my top back down as it had risen up. I turned my body round so I was facing him. He placed both of his hands either side of me and leant down close to my ear, his breath fanning against my neck. His tender lips kissed the spot directly under my lobe which made me smile contently, the innocent kiss turned into his biting roughly onto my flesh. I whined placing my hands on his sweaty shoulders, he sucked roughly on the mark he made swirling his tongue around and his lips squeezing my skin. 

“Calum” I moaned. He lifted his head taking his lips off me, them being wet and a small bit puffy. His thumb stroked over the mark collecting the wetness drying off my skin. He looked at me with his big brown eye’s 

“So I’m a freak in the sheets you say?” Calum smirked, pulling me up from the sofa. He picked me up over his shoulder as I let out a small scream. I laughed, my stomach being pressed right against his shoulder as it dug into me every time I breathed out. He carried me up the stairs, every step my tummy bouncing on his shoulder. We got to the top of the stairs, he kicked open our door walking over to our bed and throwing me onto it. I let out a laugh as he pounced onto me. I ran my hands through his hair the softness running through my fingers. He smiled showing off his beautiful white teeth, he playfully bit onto my cheek pulling onto it. I pushed his face away from me, leaving little bite marks on my cheeks as they faded away slowly. 

“You know, I don’t like it when you talk about me like that” Calum groaned, he pushed my leg the other side of his body so he was situated between my legs. He grinded into me, placing his hands either side of my face. I leant up, pushing my lips to his. I instantly moaned loving the feeling of his lips against mine. Calum pushed me roughly back onto the bed by my shoulders, tearing my lips off of his. I looked up at him pouting, he just raised an eyebrow grinding his bulge into me. I moaned in pleasure, pushing my head into the pillow. Calum’s hands ran over my thin white t-shirt and over my boobs.

“You’re not wearing a bra?” He questioned squeezing my breasts in his hand. I shook my head no, I was pretty comfortable wearing my chill clothes around my friends so I didn’t feel the need in wearing underwear. Calum flicked my nipple under my shirt watching it go hard at the sensation. He leant down and licked over my white top, the texture of it made it see through when wet so you could see my nipple fully as he licked over it. He kissed it one last time before taking off my shirt pulling it over my head, my hair flung forward as he held it in his hand. He rolled it up and with his other hand he placed one of my hands above my head. I rested it there as he got my other hand placing it against my wrist. He tied my shirt around both my hands, tying the together. 

“This is for being a bad girl and telling your friends about our sex life” he growled, he pecked my lips and sat up straight. He was still situated between my legs as he pulled my body closer. He placed both his hands on my waist as my legs were flung over his hips. He grinded into me, his hands stroking over my bare waist. I moaned interlacing my hands together so that I wasn’t uncomfortable. He placed one of his hand through his hair as he sexily rotated his hips into me. Calum looked me in the eye and I saw an abundance of lust in them. 

“God you’re so sexy” He moaned

“Not so bad yourself handsome” I grinned. Calum slid his hands down my waist pulling my sweats along with them, he sat back pulling them slowly down my legs. I whined bending my legs as he moved forward again. He leant all the way down so his face was above mine. He softly moved his bugle against my naked core, I felt the whole length move against me. 

“You’re going to be the death of me” I mumbled tilting my head towards him. He laughed tucking his head into my neck and kissing over it. He continued his assault on my neck sucking on the same mark from earlier. 

“Calum c’mon I need you” I complained, kicking my feet around like a 5 year old. 

“Fine” he grumbled kissing over my neck one last time and sitting up. He looked down at his sweats untying the bow. 

“Look you got my sweats wet” He smirked. I rolled my eye’s as he pulled them down. His cock sprung up as he shuffled the clothing down his legs. He stroked his long thin cock, coming back towards me. He parted my legs sliding his cock along my folds. Calum pushed his length into me not giving me time to adjust as he rolled his hip’s into me. When Calum entered me I always felt full, his cock would always fill me up. I watched as his tummy clenched every time his cock drove into me. 

“You feel so tight and warm” he groaned. He ran his fingers through his hair, brushing it out of his sweating forehead. I was so hypnotised by his flexed arms and his golden hips moving in such a way inside my pussy. His cock was disappearing inside me making a wet sound as my juices ran along his cock. I circled my finger over my clit, feeling the pleasure all at once. 

I looked up at Calum, a small bead of sweat running down his cheek which could easily mistaken for a tear if it wasn’t so hot in the room. Not only did I have so much lust for this man I loved him, I’m willing to give him my everything for the rest of my life. He must have sensed something was up as he leant down grinding his cock into me. His brown eye’s flickered from my lips to my eyes and I saw so much love in them.

“I love you” he groaned, pumping his hard cock into me. His lips hovered over mine as his breath fanned against my lips. I fluttered my eyelashes against my cheeks and being as cute as possible. The butterflies erupted in my stomach from feels and from his tip grazing my g-spot. 

“I love you more” I whimpered looking up at him and smiling, loving this view of him above me. He pushed his lips to mine kissing me passionately, he was smiling into my lips. Calum’s lips were so smooth against mine and they slotted into mine like a puzzle piece. He reached up blindly untying my hands from the restraint, my hand’s instantly flew to his face pulling his cheeks closer to me. His tongue massaged mine, sucking onto it. He pulled away kissing the side of my mouth leaving me a mess benching him wanting his mouth back on mine. He rammed his cock into me, speeding up his movements as he hit my g-spot. His hands stroked down my body as he grabbed my breasts thrusting into me. I moved my legs so they were around him and he hit me at a deeper angle. I felt my high approach as Calum kneaded my ass in his hands thrusting into me.

“Cal” I whimpered. I came around him, tightening my leg grip around his waist. My vision went blurry for a second before looking up at Calum. His head thrown all the way back, if it was back any further it would fall off his body. His juicy pink lips parted as he inhaled the air around us. I felt him cum shoot inside me as he pulled out last minute, the last drops of cum dribbling down his cock. He fell beside me his body heaving from his orgasm, I was still catching up on my breath too. I turned to the side looking at Calum, he was staring up at the ceiling smiling to himself. He moved up on his elbows so he was sitting up and opened up his bedside draw, moving his hand around in the drawer. I sat up and wrapped my arm around his waist.

“Y/N” he whispered stopping his movements in the drawer. I looked up at him, his beautiful jaw line and his brown eyes looking down at me. I took in the moment leaning up and kissing him sweetly. He pulled his hand out the drawer with a velvet black box, I looked down at it and my heart skipped a beat.

“I was going to do this as a big thing and have you family and my family come over and have a party. But I can’t think of a better moment to do this and honestly I can’t wait a week without having you by my side. Before I met you I never believed in marriage and it being a thing to show how much you love someone. But when I met you that changed, I get dreams of you walking down the isle and I want my dream to become a reality. So Y/N, will you marry me, Sweetheart?”