amanda burnham

Signs as shit my roommate has said
  • Aries: Why are potatoes so good?
  • Taurus: Great pickup line, Troy. 10/10 would bang.
  • Gemini: Go fuck a goomba.
  • Cancer: This school needs assigned seating in the dining halls. WE ARE INDECISIVE PEOPLE. WE DON'T CARE. GIVE US SEATS TO SIT.
  • Leo: I'm just a mess today.
  • Virgo: Amanda- *talking about grammar* I never remember the propagandas. Or whatever they're called.
  • Me- propositions?
  • Libra: This just in, the votes for Hillary Clinton are going down because she is...... A cow.
  • Scorpio: Did you put your phone in cheese again?
  • Sagittarius: Me- Is that a salad of just black olives?
  • Amanda- No..... There's cucumbers in there, too.
  • Capricorn: Amanda- *listening to Bo Burnham through headphones*
  • Room- *silent*
  • Amanda- *quoting quietly* their tasty dicks.
  • Aquarius: *sits down* Wait there's a cat under my butt.
  • Pisces: Is that Starbra Coship?