i really hope that in general they do something more interesting with book five. i think they have a lot of time to fill with that book so i’d be keen to see a way bigger vfd plotline while they’re with the quagmires (and obviously they’ll fit their spyglass pieces together, so there’s that)
i hope they do what the books did and keep you guessing about esme’s intentions - although i appreciate it might be difficult, i really think it could be great if you’re really not sure about her until the elevator moment
what i really want in book 6 is for jerome to be given a personality. i don’t really mind what it is. anything will do
please can they discover a spyglass and loads of other weird vfd memorabilia and photographs while they’re searching the squalor penthouse? they could assume jerome is a volunteer as a result. i’ve got such a clear image of them trying to talk to him about it and he’s like ‘yeah….;) ;) ;) volunteer…totally get it, yeah’ but actually he’s 100% confused and just playing along
sunny. climbing. the. elevator shaft. i’m really dedicated to this one, more than the swordfight with orwell. this could be a real moment of independence for sunny. i really hope they keep it
the discovery of the secret tunnel should be way more played up than in the books? i feel like the original book didn’t actually have time to explore some things, and that’s one of them. they popped up in the ashes of their old house. like. it was a big deal
i’d love the series to follow jacques snicket for a brief period before he’s in front of the villagers, like just little snippets. i just want to see more of him
in general, i’d like some explanation of why olaf persistently hides the quagmires in random places for seemingly no good reason, eg. the elevator shaft, the red herring, the fountain. it has never made any sense to me so i’d love it if they work that up a bit
lemony swallows when he narrates jacques’ death, and takes a long pause to maintain his composure
the whole scene that is the baudelaires running around the hospital library while esme tries to kill them with filing cabinets or her knife heels. that whole thing is going to be 10/10
i hope they keep the scene where violet phones the operator at the start of tcc, in desperation, still wearing a hospital gown. if anything i hope we see her get angrier over this than in the books, and actually say what everyone’s thinking: why won’t anyone help us?
esme’s jealous girlfriend routine would be the best piece of television. the ferocious lions cowering in the face of the woman scorned, the bit where she brings them all presents, the bit where she pretends she knew nothing about this, at all, who are you, who am i? i’m just sitting here, i haven’t even been listening, oh someone’s dead? bummer
i seriously hope they do a bit more with the freaks’ low self-worth and how it drives them towards villainy when presented with the opportunity to be considered ‘normal’ and treated with the most basic levels of respect for five minutes. i know it’s a family show, but i’d like them to be a bit upfront about the points they are making in the writing.
Here’s the thing about the “get your own community” bullshit. Here’s the thing about the keeping the community segregated and stagnant.
The reason the community thrives is because there are so many of us. We are all there to support each other. When one gets attacked, we all can rise to defend.
But when you push away one group? Its alienating. Even with others like them together, they are going to be pushed to the fringes of society. With no one to fight for them if they get attacked, they are a thousand times more vulnerable and alone.
Its not a fair thing to say “go form your own community you don’t need ours.” If there is space for all of us to have each others backs (which there always is,) we DO NOT need to be shutting people out. We do not need to be driving groups to the edges of society, ostracizing them and leaving them to fend for themselves.
Not only are we going to be just as guilty for their oppression and abuse as those enacting it on them, we weaken our own ranks by turning away allies and other marginalized groups that could have our backs as we have theirs.
So when I see, say, perisex people ganging up on intersex people, I don’t have much hope for protection these days. I feel lonely and defenseless in that area, because we are forgotten and shunned in the community. I feel alone. Other intersex people are few and far between. I can’t count on hardly any so called allies of the community to protect me because I don’t know which ones are going to insist next that I don’t actually need help or don’t share interests with the rest of the community.
And every one of the people who say that do just as much harm as actual pericishet oppressors. Saying “form your own community” is no help, is no support, is not just “having a different opinion.” Its a fucking act of aggression. Its telling me that I am not worth your support, your protection, not even with mine in return, against the same fucking people.
That doesn’t speak of “protecting the community.” That speaks of mindless prejudice. That speaks of a mindset of purity that is an absolute detriment to the community.
Any marginalized community facing the same oppressors has a shared interest, and a battle that needs unified fighters. Selecting segments of all of them to stand alone because…..you somehow value a strictly defined community over strength in solidarity, you’re a bigot and you’re more detrimental to the community than anything. You weaken the force against those that come at all of us, and leave smaller groups to be easily taken down first, then a smaller overall community left for last.
Its selfish, and foolish, and there is nothing good for ANYONE to be derived from this behavior. You have to be IGNORANT to think you can survive throwing others to the wolves.
Bisexuals, trans people, pansexuals, polysexuals, nonbinary people, aces, aros, intersex people, and all the other groups like that this applies to.
Who: Tom Holland What: Tom receives a slurred text that doesn’t make sense, so he goes to investigate and finds you drunk off your ass.
A/N : This so rough, I just threw it together. Hopefully, it’s okay.
“Bloody Hell, [Y/N].”
Tom stood at [Y/N]’s doorway, shocked to see her sprawled out on the floor with two empty wine bottles lying next to her. She looked an absolute mess. Her hair was disheveled, makeup smeared around her eyes, and her flannel buttoned wrong. Quickly shoving the spare key he had to her apartment into his pocket, he shut the door and waltzed over to her. Picking her up from the ground, “What the fuck are you doing?”
“Tom!”[Y/N] slurred happily, she clawed after him when he propped her against the couch. “Where you going?” She frowned as he walked away from her. Swaying, she put her hands on either side of her to keep her from toppling over, “I’m so glad you’re here, Tom. I missed you!”
Shaking his head, he grabbed both bottles and showed them to her, “Did you drink both of these by yourself?” His voice was stern, he had never seen [Y/N] like this before. She was always so well composed. He could only ever recall one or two times when [Y/N] was drunk and even then she was completely coherent to answer questions.
Shrugging, [Y/N] hiccuped. “Give or take a few glasses.” She waved one hand towards the wall that Tom now noticed had stains of red with broken glass on the floor. “I may or may not have, not have, thrown a few glasses.” [Y/N] giggled but it wasn’t anywhere near the kind of giggle, Tom was used to hearing. “I’m so fucking stupid.”
Sighing, Tom decided that he’d deal with one thing at a time. Setting the wine bottles far from her reach, he sat down in front of her. Crossing his legs under him, he held her shoulders, forcing her to stare into his eyes. “What happened?”
She inhaled, “Well,” [Y/N] started, hiccuping again. “[Ex’s Name] broke up with me after three years of being together and get this,” she hiccuped once more, “you ready for this? Over text. Over text, Tom. Who the fuck does that?” Running both hands over her face, she groaned. “You were right.” She stated, “I never should have dated him.”
Tom frowned, “I’m sorry, [Y/N].”
Shrugging, she laughed but not in a happy way. “I’m an idiot.” Pointing downward at herself, she shook her head at her flannel. “I’m a fucking mess. Always a fucking mess.” She tore at the buttons, getting frustrated, she yanked on them causing it to fly open and expose her bra and mid-section. “You know what he told me, Tom?” Running both hands through her hair, she laughed again. “That I’m, I’m clingy. And I expect too much from him.” Throwing her hand in the air, she leaned forward, “Well no shit! I only just spent three years wasting my fucking time on him. Of course, I’d be, be clingy and expect things from him. That’s what youdo in relationships.”
Tom tried really hard to ignore the fact that his really good friend was sitting looking pitiful as ever with her upper body on display. Running his own hand through his hair, he cleared his throat. “I think you’ve had enough to drink and it’s time that you go to bed, yeah?”
“Pfft.” Waving Tom off, she turned around against the couch and dug in between the cushions and pulled out a fifth of Jack.
“Did you? Did you hide alcohol in your couch?” Tom asked in disbelief.
“Uh duh.” [Y/N] snapped. “I’m treated like shit, might as well act like it too. And I’m going to start by finishing this whole entire thing.”
Tom lunged forward, yanking it from her hands. “No, [Y/N].” He snapped.
“Give. Me. Back. My. Booze. Holland.”
He couldn’t believe this. Out of all his friends, [Y/N] was nothing like this. She would occasionally have a glass of wine or perhaps a beer if someone could convince her. She was so proper and sophisticated. It blew his mind to see her a complete and total wreck. “You are not doing this to yourself. I refuse to take you to the bloody ER to get your stomach pumped. You’re fucking insane, [Y/N].”
Tears started to fall down her cheeks, “You don’t understand, Tom.” She squeaked. “It hurts. I want it to stop. I’ve never felt this broken before.”
Tom felt like an asshole for snapping at her. Of course she was hurting, she had been madly in love with the bloke. Tom hated [Ex’s Name]. He was moody, incredibly cocky, and always talked down to [Y/N] as if she was a piece of gum on the bottom of his shoe. She deserved much better and he thought he had gotten through to her a few months ago but even he knew deep down inside he couldn’t fight the feelings that had already settled in her bones.
“Come on,” Tom quietly spoke, ushering her to take his hands.
Frowning, she shook her head. “Just give me the bottle and let me drink myself into-”
“-death?” Tom snapped.
Squinting her eyes, she looked away from him. “I was going to say oblivion but that could work too.”
“Oh for fucks sake!” Tom half way yelled. He stepped forward, yanking her up gently but firm enough for her to be unable to fight back. He looked her dead in the eyes, “I understand you’re hurting, I can see it written all over your face but he’s not worth it, [Y/N]. No one is worth this,” he started to speak softer. “I can’t stand to see you like this, you’re an absolute wreck, it’s breaking my-it’s upsetting.”
“What else am I supposed to do?” She cried.
Letting go of her wrists, his hand quickly buttoned her shirt. Pulling her into a hug, he held her tight. He half smiled when she hugged him back tighter. He pressed his cheek to her head as she cried into his chest. Tom had never thought of [Y/N] anything more than just a friend until she started to date [Ex’s Name]. It opened his eyes that the reason he didn’t see her as anything more was because he had just gotten into the habit of always being with her and enjoying her presence. It was a weird battle he had with himself on whether or not he should express how he felt for [Y/N]. But, he wanted her to be happy and if happy meant being with that arrogant asshole, then so be it. He would just be there when it came tumbling down. And now that it was happening, it made him feel like an asshole because looking at her now with tear streaked cheeks and puffy eyes, he could have avoided all of this.
She wouldn’t be feeling like it was necessary to drink herself into the grave or feel so broken. Tom would never make her feel that way if he would have just sucked it up and told her how he felt. Even he could read behind her joke of always saying that the two of them should just get married and live their lives happy whenever she’d get into a fight with [Ex’s Name]. It could have worked out between him and her. But, again, Tom couldn’t bring himself to admit his feelings when she’d seem so happy. Because he could never admit his feelings when she was crying on his shoulder, it was never the right moment and Tom was all about the right moment.
“Let’s get you in bed, watch a movie, and get you to sleep.” Tom guided her to her bedroom. He watched as she climbed into her bed, “I promise it’ll get better.”
[Y/N] felt so empty, it was a feeling she couldn’t explain. “Will you stay, Tom? I’m afraid once you leave, I’ll go back out there looking for something to numb me.”
Tom nodded, “Of course, [Y/N]. You know I’ll always stay.” He kicked off his shoes and climbed in after her.
If you think you’re worthless, stop scrolling right now and read.
I’m writing this for a specific mutual, but it isn’t only true for one person, so read on.
You know those inspirational posts you see people reblog every day?
Stuff about people all throughout history who failed and went bankrupt and were depressed and were told they weren’t good enough - and yet somehow they rose above it and defied all those notions to become heroes and legends and history makers and culture movers. And the post always ends with “so don’t be hard on yourself when you mess up” and it’s all nice and sweet and pretty. Maybe you scroll past them. Maybe you hardly ever see them on your dash at all.
Maybe you’re among those who reblogs these posts.
But maybe every time you hit the reblog or the like button, your brain is whispering “this isn’t about you” and “yes people can do amazing things, but not you” and “ah yes amazing stories, too bad it will never happen to you” and you listen to these whisperings and you laugh and shake your head…
Because you know exactly where you stand: worthless. irredeemable. a loser. a lost cause.
Listen to me.
As your friend.
As a stranger who doesn’t know you. Who doesn’t have to know you, or your failings, or your depression, or your anxiety, or your embarrassments, or your deepest darkest most heinous crimes.
Look up. Look around you. Open. Your. Eyes. Are they open? Good. Keep them open. Don’t ever close them again. See the world. See you: a human being, valid, flawed, journeying, changing, growing, scraping, failing, rising, a masterpiece that will never be made again.
You are beautiful. You who think you are overweight and lazy. You are beautiful. You who think you are stupid and uneducated. You are beautiful. You who think you are a loser, and amount to nothing. You are beautiful. You who bleed and ache and never rest. You are beautiful.
You have worth.
Want to know a secret? If you wake up in the morning and tell yourself you’re not going to amount to anything that day, then you aren’t going to. If you go to bed at night thinking nothing will change tomorrow, then you are going to change nothing.
Because you’ve resigned yourself to that lie. And it is a lie, friend. A straight-out, soul-condemning, out-of-the-pit, self-deprecating, self-pitying lie. A lie you don’t have to believe. A lie you should not believe.
If you stand in the corner and bow your head and stare at the ground, you’ve already lost the battle without fighting. This is a surrender in which there is no honor, and in it there is no hope.
Life isn’t easy, friend. Life isn’t fair. It’s hard. And getting things done is hard. Some days, just getting up out of bed is hard. Just breathing. Just doing homework. Just going to work. Just trying to keep the dishes and trash from overflowing.
But we do it anyway.
Why? Because there’s life to live. There are choices to be made. Jokes to laugh at. Awkward conversations to be had. Art to mess up and start over on. Jobs to work. Pizza to be eaten.
We do it anyway.
So guess what?
You do it anyway too.
Why? Because of this:
You are special.
Right now, this second, turn off the voice that hears these Disney-fied words and scoffs and ignores them. Listen.
There is not a human being who has ever lived or ever will live on this planet that is not important, that is not here for a reason. No life is worthless, and most certainly not yours. My God doesn’t make worthless things, and he doesn’t make mistakes. There are no extra pieces in this universe, no spare parts. He made you. And he made you for a purpose, and that purpose is not to sit in your room, afraid to try, afraid to love, afraid to hope, afraid to climb and fall and hurt and get back up again.
Want to know another secret? You aren’t alone. Every single human being in the history of everything has struggled with feeling worthless at some point in their life. Every single one. That is not a lie. Your feelings of worthlessness are not what is special about you. You are what is special about you. The God who created you is what is special about you.
No matter what you’re going through, no matter what you’ve done, no matter what you have failed to do, someone else has gone through worse. Sometimes, a lot worse.
Oh, now you feel invalidated. “Why can’t I just believe in myself? Other people have it worse, I shouldn’t complain, I should just try harder, but I know trying harder isn’t going to help, so what’s the point.”
Stop that too.
Stop it dead in its tracks.
Kill that thought. Every day. Every morning. Every minute it shows its ugly lying face. Kill it and put it to rest. Stack headstones on top of it and move away, far far way, friend.
Don’t tell me I don’t know what I’m talking about. I don’t know where you’ve been, but you don’t know where I’ve been either. Don’t ignore hope because you think it’s for other people. Don’t keep yourself from making an effort, and pushing yourself forward. Bury the lie. You have worth. You are loved. You are important. God does not make worthless things.
One of my favorite lyrics says “How does it end when the war that you’re in is just you against you against you? You’ve got to learn to love, learn to love your enemies too.”
Learn to love.
Start learning to see you the way God sees you.
See you the way I see you.
Just at the very beginning.
Every single day you wake up is a brand new start.
A bright new chance. Every. Single. One. You will never stop getting chances for as long as you are here, so why dismiss them? Isn’t that the most beautiful thing there is? You get to keep trying. Every single day. You have the gift to go again, try again, start again, live again, breathe again, hope again.
Guess what. When the morning is wasted, the afternoon is still there. When the afternoon is wasted, the evening is still there. When the evening is wasted, the night is still there. And then morning comes again.
So the next time you see a motivational post, an inspiring reblog, a story about how someone overcame something horrible, and turned it into something amazing, look long and hard and take courage, find hope in that. Stop dismissing it as being from a universe you have no part in. Stop putting yourself to that measuring stick and turning away because you’re not there yet.
You’re looking at the end result. At some point, they were standing in your shoes. They couldn’t see the end. They couldn’t see what they might or might not amount to. They had no idea, just like you now. Just exactly like you.
Hope, my friend. Every time you start to think “I can/will never” do this or that or amount to anything or accomplish anything… Hope. Stop those thoughts immediately. Kill them. Bury them. Never stop burying them. They are lies and you are better than them.
Drive them out. Open your eyes. Look around. Pick yourself up. Brush away the tears. “I will try. My God doesn’t make worthless things, so I am not worthless. My God does not create without meaning, so I have meaning. I am here for a reason. Today I will live to find out what that reason is for today. And tomorrow I will hope again.”
Life is hard, my friend. Stop beating yourself up. You are worth more and capable of more than you can ever imagine or hope or dream. Don’t let your past or present failures stop you or beat you down. Keep going, keep hoping, keep killing the lies.
You are bigger than them, you go beyond them. And God is greater, and he
knows your heart. Trust him. Wake up. Open your eyes. Move forward. Keep your eyes open.
“You’ve got all that emotion that’s heaving like an ocean And you’re drowning in a deep, dark well I can hear it in your voice that if you only had a choice You would rather be anyone else
I love you just the way that you are I love the way He made your precious heart
Be kind to yourself Be kind to yourself
I know it’s hard to hear it when that anger in your spirit Is pointed like an arrow at your chest When the voices in your mind are anything but kind And you can’t believe your Father knows best
I love you just the way that you are I love the way He’s shaping your heart
Be kind to yourself Be kind to yourself
Well how does it end when the war that you’re in Is just you against you against you Gotta learn to love, learn to love Learn to love your enemies too
You can’t expect to be perfect It’s a fight you’ve gotta forfeit You belong to me whatever you do So lay down your weapon, darling Take a deep breath and believe that I love you
Be kind to yourself Be kind to yourself Be kind to yourself
Gotta learn to love, learn to love Learn to love your enemies Gotta learn to love, learn to love Learn to love your enemies too
Tips for dealing with perfectionism + overcompetitiveness + anxiety?
Hello!! I’ll divide this up into the three different areas. These are just a couple of points or links that might be helpful!
I know the feeling of perfectionism! It is an irritating trait to have! The quote “perfectionism doesn’t make you feel perfect, it makes you feel inadequate” is really true. Here are a couple of other things:
try to determine what drives your perfectionism - is it teachers who are overly demanding? Is it your parents setting extremely high standards? Is it yourself trying to control yourself into seeming perfect? Then remind yourself that no-one is bound to be perfect. We live, learn and make mistakes. Life is an experience and the journey through it isn’t going to be smooth. Realising that not all expectations can be reached will help to lower the pressure you’re putting on yourself.
understand that perfectionism isn’t about excellence - your perfectionist tendencies aren’t about your achievements or growth. In reality, they’re hindering your capabilities since you might be shying away from trying something out of fear it won’t be good enough. Remember that perfectionism doesn’t promote self-improvement but self-doubt.
lower your expectations and set realistic goals - when you think about it, does setting yourself with unattainable standards do any good? Generally the answer is no. Give yourself goals that are actually attainable like instead of getting 100% on a test, aim for anything about 85%. Figure out what you’re currently achievements are and aim a little higher. You’ll be much more satisfied if you can see small improvements, rather than a lack of achievement.
remember some things are out of your control - you cannot control everything in an attempt to satisfy your perfectionist ways. Sometimes things in life just happen. Learning to accept that will help to settle your mind.
put things in perspective - remember that not everything can be perfect and if it isn’t, does it really matter? Does a mistake in your notes matter? Does getting a lower mark on a test matter? As long as you’re trying, giving things your best and learning from your experiences there is nothing wrong with that.
know that mistakes are part of the road to success - similar to the above but everybody makes mistakes (if you didn’t sing this as Hannah Montana I’ll be a little sad). Mistakes help you learn. You haven’t failed or let anyone down. You’ve learnt that that won’t work and that changing something will help!
surround yourself with positivity - if things, people, events are making you conscious or feel inadequate, try removing them from your life. Think of all the positive, supportive people you can be around. Learn to love your quirks, flaws and mistakes.
For overcompetiveness here are a couple of things:
don’t let the idea of competition take over your life - life isn’t a competition and people aren’t completing with you in everything. Turning everything into a competition can either make you feel more self-confident or kind of inadequate.
keep it friendly - if you’re having a little competition with a friend, keep it that way. Don’t let it get nasty or about pulling each other down.
consider other people - admittedly beating someone who is bragging about their marks is truly thrilling however that is best kept to yourself (I had a super competitive year in high school and knowing that I did get higher marks than people who were rude to me/my friends and bragged constantly about getting the highest grades is quite pleasing, but I kept it to myself). But anyway, try to focus less on other people and their marks. Does it really matter if they beat you or you beat them?
remember not everyone is the same - Not everyone has the same standards or goals as you. Whilst you might want to beat 90%, you might have a friend who really struggles in the class and wants to get 60%.
avoid comparing yourself to others to your detriment - seeing your friends or people you know doing being successful, doesn’t mean you aren’t!
think that scores don’t really define anything about you - it is cool if you do well in a class, there is no denying it. When you’ve worked hard it is great to see scores that reflect it. But a test grade doesn’t really make you a better person than anyone else. A score isn’t going to recognise more important traits you or other people have. So in the grand scheme of things, competitiveness in a school environment isn’t worth consuming your thoughts!
And finally for anxiety, I am not going to pretend to be an expert with it. I’ve experienced small bits of anxiety but my advice probably wouldn’t be fantastic. Instead I’ll link some useful posts written by people who’ve experienced it first-hand and have applied such things. Here are some links:
2D + Murdoc night walks with s/o?? Where would they go, would they stop and stare at the stars w/ s/o, etc. (💗💗💗 lots of love for th blog)
(Thank you, dear!)
~ 2D loves spending time
with you. He loves doing everything with you, so when you suggest going for a
midnight walk he’s all over it. You two walk around town and see what kind of
shops are open this late. 2D spots a music store from across the street and
points like an excited child. You giggle and pull him towards the shop. You
walk in first and look around. It’s an older shop with aisles of vinyl records,
shelves of CDs, and instruments displayed on the back wall. 2D’s eyes grow wide
in amazement. He instantly starts looking for keyboards. You watch him dart
around before turning to look at some of the records. You dig through and find
some you like. You started to make a pile on the counter where the register
was. The cashier had been chuckling at you and 2D. “You folks havin’ a nice
time?” You giggled and nodded your head.
~ You looked around for
your boyfriend but you couldn’t find him. “Where did he run off to?” You
suddenly heard a keyboard playing in the back. You stepped forward and
following the sound. You found 2D sitting on the floor playing some random
notes on a black keyboard. He was so intrigued by the sound, he didn’t even
look up at you. “I’m guessing you’re really enjoying yourself?” You squatted down
to his level. 2D giggled and kissed you. “I fink I’m gonna get it!” He stood up
and pulled you to the register. You pulled out your wallet to pay for your
records but 2D put his hand over your wallet. “I got dis, love.” You jumped up
to kiss his cheek as he paid the nice man. “Have a goodnight!” You yelled as
you exited the store with 2D.
~ 2D was looking up at
the sky as you two started walking again. “2D, you’re going to end up running
into a pole or something.” You laughed at his silliness. He looked at you and
smiled. “Sorry, it’s jus’ da stars ar’ da only fing dat remin’ me of ya eyes.”
You blushed at his comment and he pulled you close. “I love ya.” He said before
kissing you with so much passion you felt your heart skip a beat.
~ Murdoc doesn’t sleep
much anyway so when you ask him to go on a midnight walk, he eagerly agrees.
You giggle and pull him out of the door. You two decide to take a walk through
the woods instead of through town. Neither of you wanted to deal with the night
life of the city. You wrapped your arm through his and snuggled closer to him.
He chuckled and pulled out a cigarette. He removed his arm from yours to light
it. He took a deep breath and took in the smoke. He puffed it out away from you
so it wouldn’t hit your face.
~ He kissed your cheek
and found a rock to sit on. Murdoc patted the spot next to him, indicating you
to sit down. You sat next to him and looked up at the sky. The mix of the trees
and the stars painted a beautiful site above you. You didn’t noticed Murdoc
staring you. He watched your features as you observed the sky. He sighed and asked,
“Have I ever told you how much I love you?” You looked back at him, confused. “No?” Murdoc
took another puff of smoke before speaking again. “You mean the world to me. I
never thought I’d be the one to fall in love. You’re the only who has ever shown
me how much you care. My biggest fear is showing you how much of a monster I
actually am and you running away forever. I’m not good enough for you, yet you stay.
You give my life a new meaning, one I’ve never known before. I love you more
than anything. You make me feel like I’m worth something. I can never repay you
for that.” He looked back up at your face and noticed the tears flowing down
your face. Murdoc felt bad for saying anything. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have
said anything…” He looked at the ground again and you tackled him with a hug. “Don’t
you dare be sorry! That was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard you say.
Murdoc, you owe me nothing except your love. You loving me back is all I could
ask for. You make me so happy and I couldn’t image life with anyone else.” You
placed a hand on his cheek and kissed him. Now Murdoc was crying. You kissed
him again and wiped away his tears. “I will always love.” He whispered as he
wrapped his arms around you.
“I am not worth it. I’m so fucking sorry. I am so fucking sorry I hurt you. I know that won’t do anything. There are other people more worth than me. You will find someone better than me. I’m sorry for being like this.”
Characters: Y/N Sanders (reader), Misha Collins, Benjamin Sanders (OMC), Jared Padalecki, Jensen Ackles,
Pairing: Benjamin x Reader, Misha x Reader
Warnings: Cheating (not Misha), it is flangst nothing too bad.
Word Count: 1300ish
A/N: This is 1 out of my 13 entries for @mamapeterson / @mrs-squirrel-chester’s Album Fanfiction Challenge where I chose the album “Smoke and Mirrors” by Imagine Dragons. The song prompt for this fic is: Gold
Thanks to the amazinly sweet and talented @blacktithe7 for betaing this one for me
This life had been all you had ever dreamed about since you were a small child. You had always wanted to be a singer. You wanted to perform in big stadiums with an band behind you and people screaming your name. You had loved watching your idols at the Grammys wearing pretty dresses on TV and dreamed of being there yourself one day. This was your life now. Designers was begging you to wear their products, like some sort of walking commercial. You did it because it was required , not because you enjoyed it. Not anymore atleast.
Everyone around you seemed to want something from you. They never seemed interested in getting to know the girl behind the facade. They never seemed like they really cared about you. They only wanted what your name could get them. You had thought Benjamin had been different, but at it turned out your judgement wasn’t what it used to be. When you had found him in bed with his assistant, all he talked about when you were throwing his clothes out of your shared house, was how this was going to look to the public. He didn’t tell you that he loved or that he had made a mistake. He only cared about losing the star power having you on his arm had provided and what that loss would mean to his career.
You're not anorexic, you're just managing enough control on a very low calorie diet (YOUR WORDS. anorexia is NOT a diet) to lose weight. I'm so scared of peanut butter and sugar that I consider it an achievement if I DO manage to get it down. Anorexics are never proud of themselves. So knock it off with boastful intake posts and pseudosomber replies about the "reality" of your weight loss. Your body doesn't even look good.
If my blog annoys you, you are welcome to not follow it.
But before you go I’ll let you in on a little secret. Every anorexic is a person.
(yup, EVERY. SINGLE. ONE.)
That means every one of us is different, your fear foods might be peanut butter and sugar, mine might be chips and Yogurt covered raisins. (hint: I pulled those examples off the list that I keep on my phone of foods I won’t eat, foods I won’t buy.)
That means that you might not be able to eat peanut butter at all, whereas I eat a spoonful, consider it a binge, cry, become severly depressed and consider KILLING myself over 50 calories of a snack that most people won’t even blink that.
Every one being a human being also means we feel things differently. Some people might genuinely never feel good about themselves, never have a proud moment. And maybe that is you. And maybe that’s why you’re so bitter that you feel the need to send incredibly mean and hurtful messages to people you have never otherwise said two words to.
But some of us can be proud at losing over 40 pounds in 7 months. Some of us can be proud about getting into the double digits.
Some of us can have a moment where we’re like “Yay, look how far I’ve come!” and be proud of that progress. It doesn’t mean I’m done and it does not mean I’m happy with my body. I know I look terrible. I feel it every morning when I lift up my shirt to look in the mirror and see if my bones stand out any more than they did yesterday. I feel it every time I drag my tired, depressed body out of bed at 630 am to spend an hour on the treadmill before anything else. I feel it every time I look at my huge thighs or giant love handles. You have to have an incredible level of depression, self hate, low self worth to do the things I do. But instead of bottling up my hate and sending it to strangers online, like some, I take my depression and try to use it to be that much kinder to EVERYONE I know because you never know if your smile might be the one that gives someone a tomorrow they would not otherwise have had. Seriously.
Finally, my whole point with the “anorexics are human” thing is that we all have feelings. Waking up to your lovely message was a FANTASTIC way to start my day (insert sarcasm font). I was angry at first, then pretty depressed. But you know what? I really honestly feel sorry for you. I hope you can get better, I hope you can not be so mean and bitter. I hope you can find it in you to love yourself and everyone around you.
You sent me hate this morning. I’m stopping that hate right here and sending you back some love. ❤❤❤
Sorry for the rant, feel absolutly free to scroll right on by. Just had to say that.
Jughead sat on Archies bed with his head in his hands while Archie and Betty were attempting to comfort him while he cried. They sat there like that for an hour, Jughead frantically texting and calling Y/N, trying to get any response out of her and Archie and Betty sitting on the sidelines, rushing over anytime the tears began to fall any harder than they were. Finally, Archie took Jugheads phone and put it on the desk, and Jughead collapsed backwards, shielding his red and splotchy face from his two worried friends.
“I’m actually kind of relieved Veronica told her.” Betty mumbled, and Archie nodded his head.
“I feel like an ass for keeping it from her.” Archie admitted, and Betty hummed in agreement.
“We are the worst friends ever.” Betty said, and again Archie nodded in agreement. Jughead slowly sat up, looking between his friends and sighing.
“You guys are fine, I made you hide it. I’m the worst boyfriend and worst friend.” He sulked, and the other two remained quiet. “I’m glad Veronica told her. Veronica was the only decent one out of us, and I’m happy we have at least one.”
“You aren’t the worst ever. I mean there is a lot worse people out there who have done a lot more…” Betty trailed off, not knowing where to take that sentence without making him feel bad. “This is just as much my fault as it is yours, Jughead. Don’t put all the blame on yourself.” Jughead shook his head.
“No, this is all my fault. I came onto you even though I knew I had a girlfriend-“
“You had a lot to drink, you were very much intoxicated.” Betty argued.
“That doesn’t matter. Drunk or not drunk I should have realized that what we did was wrong. I have-had an amazing and beautiful girlfriend who loved me more than I could ever dream about someone loving me, and I messed it up. She practically hates me now, what am I supposed to do? I don’t think I’ll ever find someone who loved me as much as she did. I ruin everything, my happiness, her happiness, our relationship-“
“Woah, Jughead. Slow down there. You don’t know for sure if your relationship with her is over. Just give it some time.” Archie said, walking over to the raven-haired boy sitting on his bed, and pat his back. Just then, Jugheads phone vibrated, signaling he got a text message. Jughead practically jumped off the bed and rushed over to the phone, looking down at the screen to see who it was from. He ran his hand through his hair and turned to face his friends.
From Princess <3 – We need to talk, face to face. I’ve made my decision.
“Oh thank god!” Jughead exclaimed, typing a text and turning to find his beanie and the small box he had been keeping for months.
Y/N sat on the couch, wrapped up in a blanket, leaning her head on Veronicas shoulder with Veronicas head resting on hers. They had eaten all the ice cream and watched two movies already. Veronica had fallen asleep and Y/N was getting there, but then she remembered she was expecting a text from Jughead so they could talk. As quickly and nicely as she could, she made it so Veronica was laying on the couch and she crept upstairs, picking her phone back up from the desk chair. She opened her messages and saw a text from Jughead that was sent two hours before.
From Juggie <3 :) – I’ll be at Pops, meet me when you can so we can talk.
To Juggie <3 :) – I’m sorry, I just got your text, I was watching a movie with Veronica. I’ll be there in 15.
Y/N pulled a random sweatshirt off the ground and a pair of leggings from her drawer. She quickly got dressed and made her way to the bathroom, brushing her hair and teeth, and (put on minimal makeup/decided she wasn’t going to bother with makeup). She ran back to her room, put on some socks and then some (low-heeled booties/sneakers) and made her way out the door. The walk to Pops was a cold one, even though it was spring and the middle of the afternoon, she brought her arms to her chest, huddling up to keep warm.
She walked into the brightly lit diner and looked around, spotting Jughead playing with his hands. He didn’t even have his laptop with him today, what had he been doing the past two hours? She slowly made her way over to the booth, and Jughead looked up, smiling softly. Y/N felt herself crumble inside, how could he be smiling at her, he hurt her. She felt as tears started stinging her eyes, threatening to spill, before she had a chance to think about her next action she turned and stormed out of Pops. She stopped in the parking lot and turned, facing the building and Jughead who had followed her out.
“Y/N…” he said softly, but she refused to look at his face. “Please-“
“Please what? What do you want from me Jughead, I’m hurting. You hurt me!” she yelled, and he felt as his heart dropped.
“I know, I’m an ass, I am the worst boyfriend to ever exist, and I wouldn’t blame you if you hated me for the rest of your life, because I would. I do. I hate myself because I hurt you, I pushed away the one thing in my life that made everything else worth it. And I know you’re tired of hearing it, and I know it doesn’t do anything, but I’m sorry Y/N. I am so incredibly sorry, I would do anything to take it all back. Anything at all.” He said, his head falling and tears spilling. Y/N looked at the ground as well, she wanted nothing more than to run up to him and stop his crying, to make him feel better and to make him smile, but her feet wouldn’t move. “I love you, Y/N. I love you so much.” He whispered.
“I love you too, Jughead. I still do, and frankly I don’t think I’ll ever not love you.” She whispered as well. She looked up, and saw Jughead staring at her. He gave a tight smile, and she tried to return it. “I have to tell you my decision.” She said, and he nodded, expecting the worst. He braced himself for it, this is when she was going to say goodbye.
“Jughead I feel absolutely broken by what you did. It hurts me, physically and mentally that you cheated on me.” She started, and another tear fell down his face. Anyone could tell she was internally struggling with what to do. “With that being said, I don’t-I can’t imagine a life where I wasn’t with you. It’s impossible, and I don’t know why because trust me, when I found out what you did this morning I tried. I tried so hard to imagine what my life would be like but I couldn’t. Forsythe Pendleton, I love you so much, and I’m going to give you one more chance. Only one more because this is the first serious thing you’ve done to me. You’ve hardly done anything minor to me, you’ve been great, and I think you deserve one more chance.” She concluded.
“Thank you.” Jughead said, relief washing through him. He wasn’t going to lose her, he was the happiest he had been in months. Y/N walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him into her. He happily embraced her as well, the two of them hanging onto each other for dear life. After a few minutes, Jughead decided exactly what he was going to do. “Y/N?” he mumbled in the crook of her neck.
“Jughead.” She said, and he pulled away slightly, just so he could look her in the eyes. Both of their faces were blotchy and red, eyes swollen and tinted red from crying.
“I know, that we just made it so we were officially still together and all, and this might be way too rushed and soon, but I can think of no other way to make this up to you but by doing this. What I’m about to give you, I’ve had way before Betty, and I feel there is no other time but the present to do this. I am in love with you Y/N Y/L/N, I’ve been in love with you from our first date. You’re my princess…” he reached for the silver crown charmed necklace he gave to her months before for her birthday, brushing it ever so slightly. “And I’m your prince.” He said, nodding his head a bit, referring to his beanie.
“You’re such a dork.” Y/N giggled, beaming at him. Jughead playfully rolled his eyes and kissed her on the forehead, pulling back again to finish the rest of his speech.
“Y/N will you make me the happiest sixteen-year-old to ever live and…” he kneeled and pulled out a small box with a beautifully simple ring in it. “Take on the world with me? ” he asked, and she stood speechless.
“I-Uh…Jughead. Of course!” she exclaimed, taking his hand and pulling him to his feet. He smiled brightly and pulled her into a kiss, grabbing her left hand and slipping the ring on. “Jughead, where’d you get this?” she asked.
“My mom, she had old nice rings from earlier on in her life and I asked to have one.” He admitted, and Y/N smiled down at the band.
“Its beautiful.” She gushed, and he chuckled. He wasn’t going to mess this up, there was no way he was going to let her slip from him again. “You and me Juggie.” she whispered, capturing his lips with hers again.
So I watched the last four episodes of the upcoming Steven Bomb and I have to say, it’s actually pretty good. Let me go episode by episode of the Bomb past Lion 4 (which was pretty bad).
This is an example of a filler episode that’s actually good. People might think I’m anti filler because I made this post, but I’m not really anti filler as much as I’m anti boring episodes and this one wasn’t boring. It’s got good atmosphere, an entertaining story, some actual suspense, and gives character development to a character that didn’t have any before. You could say they retconned Doug’s personality a bit, before he seemed very snobby but now is a bit of a goof, but I’m fine with that. It’s a good thing that Connie’s parents aren’t as unlikable as they were in Fusion Cuisine. The episode also has a ending that will come into play later in the bomb. Though if I had one minor complaint about this episode, it’s that it pretends that Steven Universe has been exciting lately, which is pretty delusional.
The Good Lars:
This is definitely a filler episode, but I didn’t mind it as much as I thought I would. It told a decent slice of life episode that featured good character development for Lars and Sadie. One thing that I liked about the episode was that it wasn’t a Larsadie episode, it was Lars and Sadie episode. Though there was some Larsadie stuff like a line where it seems Lars is going to say he loves Sadie to which I went “Aw! The show thinks I give a crap. How cute.” This episode did probably benefit from bar lowering both by Season 4′s drop in quality and the previous Larsadie venture, but I would say it was decent. It at least felt like an old SU episode while many of the bad episodes of season 4 felt like they came from a different show. A show that didn’t care if it was entertaining and didn’t respect its audience.
Are you My Dad/ I am My Mom:
These two episodes are pretty good, not as good as some other big episodes like Jailbreak and Earthlings, but still pretty good. These episodes had a great mystery element to it, and pretty good payoff. There’s a reveal that I feel was brilliant. I unfortunately saw it coming because I saw somebody theorize it in a Tumblr post. For some reason, the person who posted about this was pissed off about it, but I completely disagree. I felt like the reveal was a very good use of continuity. The writing for the bomb overall is pretty strong. These episodes introduce two new gems, Aquamarine and Topaz. I do enjoy their personalities, well I enjoy Aquamarine personality since Topaz is just a voiceless henchgem. I was worried they were going to be Peridot and Jasper 2.0, but they’re really not. I wasn’t really the biggest fans of their designs at first, and I’m still not, but their designs did grow on me a little while watching these episodes. What makes these episodes worth it was the ending. I’m not spoiling anything, but it makes certain that Season 5 will at least be more interesting than Season 4.
Overall I would say that Season 4 ended strong despite being the weakest season of Steven Universe. I’m glad I was able to see these episodes and I’m definitely going to make a Mellow Frames on Doug Out, Are you My Dad, and I am My Mom. I’m probably going to make a list of my least favorite to favorite episodes of Season 4 shortly after these episodes officially air. I will admit that the list will be mostly negative, but hey, that’s what Season 4 has been like. I do think the show will bounce back in Season 5.
Gakuen Bungou Stray Dogs 2017 Character Profile and Q&A
i’m so excited for this new anime! the visuals look great and i can’t wait uwu
(i’m not an active part of bungou fandom, but i saw this on twitter and i decided to try my hand at it! also can someone please let this grandma know how to put this all under a read more, that would be much appreciated)
Our spring is still young and a little painful! The return of Bungou Seishun Graffitti!
A very normal high school student except for the fact that his white hair stands out. He became a member of the Armed School Council (as an assistant) due to certain reasons and helps solve fights at school. According to Dazai, he’s “a man of love and justice”.
Dazai Osamu A mysterious young man who’s tall and has disheveled hair. He’s the secretary of the Armed Student Council, but never does any paperwork. His hobby is committing suicide. Because he keeps going in and out of the hospital, his real age is unknown.
Oda Sakunosuke A student teacher who was assigned to the school. It seems like he’s acquainted with Dazai, but the details are a mystery. His usual breakfast is Canadian bacon and scrambled eggs. His favorite food is mixed curry.
Akutagawa Ryuunosuke Known as “Prince of the Infirmary”. He wears a frilly piece of cloth around his neck, but even he doesn’t know what it’s called. Since he coughs often, he’s frequently in the infirmary.
Nakahara Chuuya A delinquent transfer student who wears a black hat and knows about Dazai’s past. His hat was confiscated on the first day of his transfer because it was against the school’s dress code. Short.
Sakaguchi Ango A prefect who’s trademark is his glasses. He doubts if Atsushi’s white hair is natural. Known as “Professor[-like] Glasses”.
Question 1 - Please introduce yourself.
My name is Nakajima Atsushi. Other than the fact that my white hair stands out, I’m just another normal high schooler. I became a member of the Armed Student Council because of certain reasons. My favorite food is chazuke! Being alive is such a wonderful thing. It’s another new day after you sleep and wake up, and you get to eat!
… Um, my hair is actually natural?
Introduce myself? A self introduction… what do you want to know about me? My name? It’s Dazai Osamu. I’m the secretary of the Armed Student Council, though paperwork is rather annoying. I spend my days looking for good ways to commit suicide. Since I’m always in and out of the hospital, I’ve had to repeat the school year for a number of times…
Hmm? What is it? So… you’re curious about my age. I’ll leave that to your imagination.
I am Akutagawa. I am a mere high school student who learns at school and lives on the streets. I suffer from a respiratorial disease, so I unwittingly spend half of my time at the school infirmary. I know more about the arrangement of the medicine cabinet than the school nurse. I am greatly troubled by the fact that someone has started calling me by the nickname “Prince of the Infirmary”. I would like to ruthlessly get rid of useless hindrances and people who create needless havoc, but at this point in time there are no such people for me to get rid of at school.
… That frilly thing on my lapel? I know not of it’s name.
Aa? Why the hell do I have to introduce myself. It’s damn annoying.
… Ugh! Fine! I just gotta do it, right?! I’m Nakahara Chuuya. It pains me to say this, but I have something like an unfortunate acquintance with that asshole Dazai. That hat that I like… is at home right now. Like hell I’m letting the school confiscate it because it goes against the dress code!
My height…? If you treasure your life then you sure as hell better not say any more than that.
I’m Sakaguchi Ango from Class 3B. My height is 178cm, and my weight is 62kg. I am currently appointed as a school prefect. It seems like the recent transfer student has a very striking hair color. He claims that it’s natural, but whether or not that’s true…
Pardon me? … Wait, this is a mole. It’s not dirt.
A self-introduction? My name’s Oda Sakunosuke. My friends call me Odasaku. I’ve been assigned to this school as a student teacher, and I teach Literature. I don’t think it’s anything particularly worth mentioning… Is this enough [for a self-introduction]? Ah right, I eat curry rice three times a week. It’s not that I like it specifically, it’s just a habit of mine. The curry rice that I eat has vegtables that would melt in your mouth and beef tendon that’s been stir-fried with garlic. It tastes light. I cook that with an excellent blend of spices, then mix it all up with a lot of rice. I eat it with eggs and sauce.
… Hmm? Dazai? Dazai is…
Aa, sorry looks like it’s time for the staff meeting. We’ll talk more about that later.
Question 2 - Tell us your favorite class.
My best subject is Physical Education! Today we had a joint-PE class with Dazai-san and the others, but Akutagawa had to leave for the infirmary in the middle, and Nakahara-san picked a fight with Dazai-san, then Dazai-san disappeared all of a sudden… It’s a pity it didn’t seem like a Physical Education class anymore. It’d be great if I could do sports properly next time…
My favorite subject is probably Literature. I don’t really understand some of the more difficult things, but I’m happy that I get to read a lot of books!
I don’t particularly like class. I already know these things without having to be taught, so why do I have to go out of my way to be locked up in a small room just for that. It’s not even a good way to kill time. Especially Physical Education, since it’s still so cold during this time of the year that I’d rather sleep in the infirmary. But Akutagawa-kun’s there in the infirmary… and Yosano-sensei would find out that I’m skipping class. Kunikida-kun would start nagging at me too.
But during joint-PE class today I passed by Odasaku. That wasn’t bad.
Due to the fact that I spend half of the school year in the infirmary, I lack enough information to form a proper opinion of my likes and dislikes of the classes. In general, I don’t dislike any of the classes. Though I’m rather stumped over the calculation of definite integrals [in mathematics], I’m satisfied with the classes overall.
I would like to join swimming classes once.
… Class? Not interested. It’s just that I can’t stand to be worse than that asshole Dazai. Even though that jerk’s literally just a bandage attachment, his brains piss me off…
That’s why it’s not a matter of liking or disliking it. This is a showdown between me and Dazai. And if it’s a fight then there’s no way I’m falling behind. That’s all there is to it.
I don’t really understand the point of this question. To like or dislike it, I’ve never thought of class from that point of view. It’s because class is something you’re always supposed to attend. It’d be troublesome to constantly skip class the way Dazai does. Ah yes… to be good or bad at it, if it’s from that perspective then I understand. Anyone would have a tendency to score well or score badly in particular subjects.
Naturally I don’t have any subjects that I’m bad at.
My favorite class? I’ve never thought about it. I don’t decide to do things based on whether I like something or not. For most things in general at least. I’m a teacher, and since teaching is a job where it’s required for me to conduct classes, then that applies even more. If we’re just talking about likes and dislikes, then I don’t dislike my job as a teacher. Though I don’t look like it.
Speaking of, I passed by Dazai on campus today. It seemed like he’s actually attending class for once, though I wonder how long he intends on staying a high schooler.
Question 3 - Please tell us what you had for dinner tonight.
I had chicken chazuke today! Umeboshi topped with shredded nori, and also yesterday’s leftover chicken. When you take a bite of that together with hot soup and the little strips of konbu floating on top… that’s the best! Every day I get to eat, go to school, and work for the Armed Student Council even though it’s a little tough. I’ll work hard tomorrow as well!
Ah… um, I really have to go talk to Sakaguchi-san… He probably won’t believe me even if I tell him that my hair’s natural. I’ll go ask Dazai-san for advice…
Hm…. How annoying. If Odasaku’s there then I’ll have to properly go to school, so I might as well go to sleep. But I’m hungry… But since we had Physical Education today I’m exhausted… And I hate having to boil water. I want my food to come to me…
Hey fooooood – cooooooome –
Western-style food. I designed a menu that considers nuitritional value and prioritizes nourishment to the respiratorial system. However, as I do not have a large appetite, I do not consume very much.
I hate mikans, but I occasionally crave some after meals.
Boiled spinach with mitsuba and miso soup. The ingredients [for the miso soup] are tofu and green onion. And grilled fish. And rice. Then I might as well make the side dishes for tomorrow’s bento. That fucking Dazai always steals from my bento…
I’ll definitely make him cry tomorrow.
Since I have to prepare the paperwork that’s due for submission, I don’t really have time to cook. When this happens I eat energy bars that I bought from the drugstore with other nuitritional suppliments…
Haa… I’d like to have a warm meal.
Also, Nakajima Atsushi-kun. Let’s have a proper talk tomorrow.
I was gonna go with curry but I’ve already had that yesterday. I made nikujaga today. I was thinking about things while making it so I made a bit too much. There are a lot of things to think about in this world, and whatever you think about wouldn’t necessarily come to a good conclusion. Since it can’t be helped, I brought the extras to Dazai’s place. He probably thought that preparing a meal was too troublesome and was rolling around on his bed anyway. Dazai’s been living next door for a while now. Hopefully he found the food before it got cold.
I’ll see you tomorrow then. Don’t be late because you stayed up all night.
if you thought akutagawa’s answers sound weird, it was deliberate because he is literally an old man and hey, it’s april fool’s. hope y’all enjoyed this and lmk if i messed up anything o/
A/N: Hey guys! I really enjoyed writing this and I have some more imagines coming you way!!
Warnings: protected sex (I forgot last time 😬)
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader
Prompt: the reader is a virgin but spence doesn’t know and it’s her first time and she gets really nervous but he helps guide her
Upcoming Imagine: Part 2 for…
You and Spencer laid on the couch, enjoying the second movie night in a row.
“I’m so glad criminals have days off so we can have ones like these.” You said snuggling into Spencer’s chest.
“Me too.” He said kissing your forehead.
You turned around and faced your back towards his chest and he pulled you closer.
His hands gently rubbed up and down your side, trailing from your ribs to your hips, slowly lifting your shirt.
“That tickles.” You said as his hands slid up your bare skin.
He smirked and started tickling you again.
“Spencer stoooop.” You barely made out through all of the laughing.
You kicked and tried to push him off but he turned to lay on top of you so you couldn’t struggle anymore.
“What do you want?” You asked still laughing as his fingers teased your sides some more.
“Mmm a kiss.” He said thinking and then leaving his lips centimeters apart from yours.
You sat up a little and kissed him sweetly.
“You got your kiss now get off of me so I can breathe.” You said squirming underneath him.
A small smirk played across his lips, turning your mood from cute and silly to daring and lustful.
“Are we going to play this game?” You asked biting your lower lip as his hands moved hair from your face.
You remembered how your last movie night went and how it ended in a heated make out session.
“Mhm.” He said slowly kissing your neck.
Your fingers instantly were instantly lost in his hair, making him moan into your neck.
He kissed your lips quickly and got off of you, making you desperate for him to come back.
He picked you up and carried you to your bedroom and lied you on the bed.
You started to take off his cardigan as his hands wandered to your sweatpants, slowly pulling them down.
You rolled over so you were on top of him and kissed his lips as you unbuttoned his shirt, leaving the tie on.
He sat up, making you sit on his lap, and pulled your shirt over your head.
Your hands wandered lower and lower and his breathe hitched in his throat.
“I want you.” He whispered looking into your eyes.
You stopped what you were doing in fear.
“I mean - sorry I that was really straightforward. I can wait trust me. Your worth waiting for.” He said awkwardly as you sat on him.
“No I… I want to. I’m ready I’m just a little nervous.” You said as he played with your hair.
“I am too but trust me I’m pretty sure you’ll do great.” He said trying to boost your confidence.
The only thing he doesn’t know is that your a virgin.
You know he is too, but he seems a lot more confident than you do right now.
You, of course, love Spencer but you don’t want to mess anything up.
“Y/N?” He said turning your attention to him again.
“Sorry umm… Spencer I'm… I’m a virgin. Like I haven’t done this before.” You said gluing your eyes to your hands.
“Hey Y/N.” he said tilting your chin up to look into your eyes. “If you don’t want to…”
“But I do Spencer.” You said interrupting him.
“Well I haven’t done it either but I have an idea so… let me guide you.” He said turning you over to lay on your back.
He slowly leant down to kiss your lips, starting slow and soft and shortly aggressing.
You felt your core tighten as his hands wandered lower and play with the strap of your panties.
“Spencer.” You moaned scratching down his back.
“Can I take this off?” Spencer asked hooking his finger in the middle of your bra.
You hesitantly nodded and he lightly kissed your lips, giving you more time in case you changed your mind.
His hands slowly went to the back of your bra and unhooked it.
Before pulling it from your body, he kissed a trail from your shoulder to your jaw.
Once he threw the bra on the ground his eyes wandered to your chest.
“Your so beautiful Y/N.” he said gently massaging your breasts.
You threw your head back in pleasure as his cold hands made contact with your sensitive skin.
Slowly, the anxious worry started to disappear as he appreciated every inch of your body.
Your hands roamed down his body, making his hips thrust against yours.
Your hands went lower to his boxers and you palmed his hard erection, earning a load moan to escape his lips.
You reached over to your end table and picked up a condom and put it in his hand.
“Now? I mean are you sure your okay with this?” He asked taking the little package from your hand.
“Yes I’m positive.” You said looking up at his gorgeous face.
You pulled down his boxers slowly for him and he put the condom on.
Then he returned the favor and pulled your underwear off as well.
His hand ghosted the insides of your thighs making your shudder underneath his touch.
He positioned himself at your opening and looked you in the eyes.
“Don’t worry. If there is anything you don’t like just tell me and I’ll stop.” He said brushing hair out of your eyes.
You nodded, desperate for him to be inside of you.
Then you felt his tip slowly enter you.
There was a little pain but once he was fully inside of you, you realized the pleasure of feeling full by the man you love.
He started thrusting slowly, easing in and out of you.
“S-Spencer… faster please.” You said pulling his hair.
You saw a smirk play across his lips as he started quickening his pace.
You wrapped your legs around his back, giving a new, orgasmic angle.
“Oh god Spencer…” you moaned as he hit your gspot multiple times, sending waves of pleasure throughout your whole body.
Your walls started closing around him making him moan your name.
“Y/N I’m going to…” you felt him shudder as he came inside of you, then throwing you over the edge.
He pulled out and practically fell on top of you, making you laugh.
“That was so… great.” He said out of breathe.
“I know. I can’t wait for round two.” You said playing with his hair.
His head shot up, his mouth open in excitement.
“Round two?” He asked taking the condom off and throwing it away.
“Round two.” You said as he laid on top of you, kissing your lips before breaking it with a cute laugh.
You had a best friend you met when you were eight years old. Emily was her name. But when she moved away to the same little town her second cousin lived in nearly two years ago, you hadn’t seen each other. Scarce were the calls between the two of you. So you decided to give her a surprise visit.
To celebrate Supernatural’s 15th season, the producers have decided to hold a contest to cast an unknown in a recurring role as Sam’s rumored love interest. They are doing open casting calls all over the country. Your best friend Nikki wants to go and she drags you along.
A/N: My inspiration for Nikki is the one and only red, @oriona75. So I am actually telling two stories here, Jared and Readers, and Sam and Gemini’s. It flips back and forth, so try and keep up! :)
Characters: Jared Padalecki, Reader, Best friend Nikki(OC) Jensen Ackles, Misha Collins, Mark Sheppard, PA Emily (OC) Cliff, Other Supernatural cast and crew
❛ We have to ask the Gods for their help ❜ ❛ We have to prepare sacrifices ❜ ❛ What shall we sacrifice? ❜ ❛ If the army fails; If they are defeated by ____ our people might never recover ❜ ❛ I think ____ mean(s) ‘who shall we sacrifice?’ ❜ ❛ I want to ask you something ❜ ❛ Are you saying he wanted you to be our leader? ❜ ❛ What? What? ❜ ❛ That was the woman who made me believe I have to be King of all ____ in order to marry me ❜ ❛ I think of ____ everyday of my life ❜ ❛ ____ wants to lead the army ❜ ❛ ____ should lead the army! ❜ ❛ What did you say to ____ ? ❜ ❛ I told ____ that I’ve always loved ____ ❜ ❛ I’m surprised to see you ❜ ❛ You saw me but you didn’t bother come to say hello ❜ ❛ I wanted to marry you. You turned me down. I wasn’t important enough for you ❜ ❛ Everything I have done, I have done for you, and the Gods! ❜ ❛ Please don’t kill me. Please ❜ ❛ You know the rules of the race, ____ , you have to serve the feast ❜ ❛ It is you that is not happy, ____ ❜ ❛ Something happened to you in ____ and you have not been the same ❜ ❛ It’s a truth. I just don’t know what the truth is ❜ ❛ You have seen all you needed to? ❜ ❛ They are not as safe and secure as they think they are ❜ ❛ Go and make your plans. We wait to hear of your success ❜ ❛ You should have killed ____ when you had the chance ❜ ❛ I love all of our Gods. All of them. But I only love two people; you, my ____, and ____ ❜ ❛ If I decide not to kill ____ then no one can ❜ ❛ I don’t think it’s fair that I should keep ____ to myself. It doesn’t seem right ❜ ❛ I know you two like each other. I can see ❜ ❛ You are talking about sharing me. How can you not be jealous? ❜ ❛ Tonight you will die and feast with the Gods ❜ ❛ I hope that was enjoyable, otherwise is not worth it ❜ ❛ This is my decision! ❜ ❛ We are all equally ____, but we are not equal in battle. So I will take the lead. I will establish the battle plans and I will give the orders, do you understand that? ❜ ❛ You don’t agree ____ ? ❜ ❛ I didn’t say anything ❜ ❛ Your age makes you believe you know more than you do ❜ ❛ What have you done? ❜ ❛ What battles have you won? And what battles have you lost? ❜ ❛ It is in failure, my ____, that is when we learn the most ❜ ❛ You don’t want to listen, that is your choice ❜ ❛ I am the leader of this great army. Me! And you will obey me! ❜ ❛ I was about to receive the body and blood from Christ, our savior ❜ ❛ Thank you. Now get out! ❜ ❛ You should have listened to me ❜ ❛ Most of my life you’ve either manipulated, or humiliated me. You used me to fulfill your ambition ❜ ❛ What kind of a father are you? ❜ ❛ You’re not behaving like a King anymore ❜ ❛ How the little pigs will grunt when they hear how the old boar suffered ❜ ❛ How much gold and silver do you want to spare my life? ❜ ❛ Name your price. Anything ❜ ❛ My father was worth more than gold and silver. That is not the price you must pay ❜ ❛ I’ve been told your God is a carpenter and guess what? So am I ❜