am i allowed to be happy about this

if the fates allow

on the longest night of the year, some cozy holiday fic

(p.s. ONE MORE DAY OF SCHOOL, I am for sure more excited than the students)


through the years we all will be together
if the fates allow
until then we’ll have to muddle through somehow


December 23rd, 1993

“Got any big plans for Christmas?” he asks as Scully starts to pack up. It’s just about closing time. Mulder doesn’t like being between cases - there’s nothing good about going home at five o’clock.

Scully continues loading files into her briefcase. She can’t seriously be planning to tackle all of that shit over the holiday - she’s only taken off Friday and Monday.

Of course, that’s two more days than he’s taking off. Possibly four more, if he comes in over the weekend. Mulder spent last Christmas in his basement office. He’d snapped a branch off an evergreen tree in front of the Bureau and given the finger to the security camera. His office smelled good for days.

“My parents are coming over,” she says, and there’s this little twinge of anxiety in her voice that reassures him, somehow. He’s always imagined the Scullys as a perfect television family: the captain and his wife and their four red-headed children running around the lawn. It’s nice to think that even her family is nerve-wracking. “And my brother and his wife are flying in. Usually my parents host it, but they weren’t up to it this year, so…”

“Yeah?”

She glances at him and sighs. “It’ll be nice,” she says, like she’s trying to convince herself. “I just have to do a lot of cleaning before they get here.”

While he hasn’t spent all that much time at Scully’s apartment, this assertion seems wildly unlikely. Her books are alphabetized. He’s sure her underwear drawer is color-coded. Do not think about her underwear drawer, he reminds himself. That’s definitely one of the Ten Commandments of Platonic Partnerships.

She asks, “How about you?”

He aims for nonchalance, but doesn’t quite get there. “Drinking expired eggnog. Watching ‘Close Encounters of the Third Kind.’ The usual.”

“By yourself?”

The surprise in her voice touches him. He’d assumed it was obvious.

“Yeah, the Mulders don’t really go in for big family gatherings.”

“Well, you could come over to my place.” She’s not looking at him when she says it, so he’s not sure how seriously to take the invitation.

“Nah. The fish would miss me. Thanks, though.”

Finally she stops moving paper around and looks at him. “Seriously, Mulder. You shouldn’t have to be alone on Christmas. My family is…well, I’m sure they’d be glad to meet you.”

This, too, strikes him as highly unlikely, but he keeps his mouth shut. “I appreciate the offer. Enjoy your holiday.” He pats her on the shoulder as he leaves, but her gaze follows him out.

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i was sitting in the car today and thinking about my sadness and how i wanted to just go home and cry and be miserable and then i realized, why? why would i do that? why would i allow myself to spend today miserable and sad when a tomorrow is never even promised? and i know damn well i wouldn’t want to spend my last day here on earth, as sad. so i try and live my best, make it through the days with happiness coursing through my veins and a smile on my face for those i love. and that’s okay. it’s so okay if all that’s all you did today. it’s okay if all you did today was force a smile, got out of bed, or picked yourself up. sometimes that’s all you need to do.

anonymous asked:

I'm at a point where I'm tired of being fake happy, but understand that being sad/mad/depressed will not make things better. I'm mentally/physically drained.Do you have any recommendations that helps calm the mind/soul I don't want to head into the new year feeling like this.

It’s okay to not be happy. Embrace your sadness, madness, and depression; accept them. Flow with your emotions, but don’t allow them to constantly dictate your actions, because they are fleeting like ocean waves - they come and go. How can you ever truly heal if you keep sweeping your “negative” emotions under the rug instead of face them? They must be examined, touch, and felt to find the root or triggers. So sometimes we have to admit it like “Fuck it - yes I am unhappy. I am not feeling good. What is causing this feeling, and what can I do about it?” Just by welcoming your truth of unhappiness will lighten you up, because pretending will only drain your soul as you stated.

If we observe social media alone, we can see how we’ve been programmed to believe that we’re supposed to feel happy 100% of the time, but no one does. Most of us proudly only post our smiles, accomplishments, and goals, but when it comes to our sadness or failures it isn’t anyone’s business… and this is where the imbalance seeps in - neglecting and hiding.

“Happiness comes and goes. You have to do what brings you peace of mind.”

How To Free Yourself From Repressed Emotions 

How To Remain In Balance With Your Emotions

Why We Have To Feel To Heal

How To Use Pain To Raise Your Vibration 

I JUST MET SHADOWHUNTERS CAST TODAY!!!

I’ll just share my experience because I am beyond happy it happened. So, I attended the autograph session hosted by Netflix and unfortunately they didn’t allow us to take pictures. I’ll tell my impressions and what happened in order of how they were sitting.

Matt: His smile is just unbelievable, trust me, and he doesn’t stop smiling. He was the first in line and he was surprised about how tall I am and wouldn’t stop talking about it, saying I was just like him. Yeah, we bonded over our height haha #teamtol. I asked for a hug and he nicely hugged me (I didn’t ask it to the others bc the staff said it wasn’t allowed and Matt was the only one placed where they wouldn’t yell at me lol). He is even more sweet and charismatic than I thought. And again, his smile is insane.

Dom: Dom saw my tattoo (a key on my forearm) and was like “oh, let me see it” and I showed him. He was super surprised and then the most weird and fun thing happened. He said “Oh my God, my ex-girlfriend has the exact same tattoo on the exact same place.” He was so surprised that he told Alberto about it and showed him my tattoo.

Alberto: He listened to Dom and saw the tattoo as well, then we shook hands and he was laughing about what Dom told him. He asked me if I knew Dom’s ex-girlfriend and if I was secretly her haha. The three of us talked about it and it was definitely an unusual conversation, but it was fun. Domberto is the best friendship and I saw it with my own eyes haha.

Kat: She saw what was going on and she basically interrupted Alberto so we could shake hands even before it was her time to sign my poster. I told her we were super excited about season 2 and she was super happy to hear it and told me she is super excited for us to see it. She is the sweetest small cinannamon roll to ever live, seriously. She is so small, smiley and pretty.

Eme: She was the last one and the staff was rushing me to leave, so we just quickly talked about how much she was enjoying Brazil and she is super adorable as well, and the beauty queen you all know she is. Actually I just got surprised bc she is as small as Kat in real life.

So it was what happened. I’m so happy about everything and so grateful for the chance to meet them. ALL of them are the most friendly, sweet and beautiful people to ever exist and deserve all the love and support. 

I refuse to answer any dumb or mean anonymous (or even not anon) comments and asks about the way I look, why I look this way, and any other ignorant questions. I was just born this way, no reason for it. Don’t feel bad for me, don’t pity me or look down on me. I have a condition, but it does not affect my daily living. I have a normal, amazing life with a wonderful family, thankful and appreciative friends, and the ONLY way I will allow for sympathy is for when rude, ignorant, hurtful people decide to publicly humiliate me. I am human just like everyone else, I live, I breathe, I eat, I laugh, I LOVE. And whoever cannot accept that can stay out of my way of living a happy and healthy life. I would really appreciate it if this gets reblogged to raise awareness to bullying as well as the condition I was diagnosed with- I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE!!

here is a bit about my diagnosis..
I was born with lymphatic malformations. For me, it affects my face but this can occur anywhere on the body. There are lymph vessels that are enlarged and extra lymphatic fluid in those surrounding areas. It is not due to any food, medicine, or activity during pregnancy. It just happened. If you have any other questions, just ask. Like I said, curiosity is OKAY. Cruelness is NOT.

The First Annual Newschannel 6 Secret Santa

Summary:  Killian Jones is a sports anchor who has always played the field, until a few months ago, when a stunning blonde walks through the doors of Newschannel 6 WBOK as the new lead anchor. Emma Swan entered the doors of Newschannel 6 looking for a fresh start after an awful break-up, but one look at Killian Jones, and it throws a wrench in her plan. 

Rating: T (some language)  

Word Count: ~5100

Author’s Note: Merry Christmas, @notdonewithyou! I am your CS Secret Santa! I am so happy to have gotten to know you and that you have allowed me to create this. For those who don’t know, my husband is a sports anchor, so it’s about time I did this AU. I also created a banner for it :) Also: there’s a reference to one of my favorite modern AUs in this fic ;)

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badwolf83  asked:

Hey! I'm pretty disappointed with tonight's episode, but you seem to be getting a lot of crap for enjoying it and I just wanted to say that I am genuinely happy that you (and anyone else) are able to enjoy it. I hope you continue to do so. I hope after some time and distance I will be able to enjoy it, at least in part, as well. I think I'll feel better about it if they commit to doing a series 5 so that I know it doesn't end like this. Anyway, I hope you have a good night and people back off.

Thanks for your nice words, the fact is I don’t think TFP was terrible and I like some parts very much, maybe I am not quite happy with the ending but we can’t have everything :-) I don’t mind getting hate for it, ,that’s what immature people are like, they just don’t allow others to have different opinions than theirs. That’s tolerance, according to them, you’re right when you think like they think. Well, I’m above that, so it’s better they’ll go far away from me, at least until they grow up enough to let other people feel differently.

As for series 5, I very much hope they’re going to confirm it. I need it so much.

Thursday Truth:

I am an incredibly selfish person, and I’m mostly unapologetic about it. Every once in a while I feel about ten seconds of guilt about it, but those attacks of conscience don’t happen often. 

I am mostly selfish with my time. I need a lot of time to myself.  That’s who I am and I won’t apologize for it.  Having quiet time to read, linger over tea or coffee, write a post here, go for a bike ride or walk on my own–whatever the case, it makes me happy.  It keeps me at peace.  It allows me to restore my energy so that I can be fully present, supportive, and open in my other moments.

I don’t multi-task well in relationships.  When I’m with you, I’m with you.  My friends and family know that I’m not a caller or a texter.  If you have something you just have to tell me right then, ok, but make it quick.  When I get home each day, it’s family time or personal time.  As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a cactus friend.  I literally have to schedule phone time with my close friends who live far away because I’m not the kind of person who can half-ass listen to a phone call while I’m doing something else.  Nope.  If I’m talking to you, let’s get right into something meaningful, and you’ll have my whole focus.  And, when I’m with you, just BE YOU.

I also am ruthless about dropping “responsibilities” that I don’t want or prioritize.  For example, I don’t send Christmas cards because this time of year is always hectic and I allow myself to drop that from my to-do list. The other day, I didn’t go visit my father because I wanted more time with my brother and niece and I simply would not have been in the right frame of mind after rushing through a visit with them and then driving an hour each way.  I often send gifts late because I either refuse to spend an hour of my time in line at the post office or I don’t go shopping until I have the right amount of time to get the perfect gift. I used to apologize all the time for these and a MILLION other ways that I’m not “perfect,” but I don’t bother with that anymore.  I am who I am, and I’m a BETTER version of who I am if I’m not trying to live up to a standard I find too overwhelming. I have zero intention of being supermom, superwife, superwoman, whatever. No thanks. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯  
2

My nipples are just skin. There is nothing sexual about them. On most social media outlets, television, movies, etc. you’re allowed to show everything but the nipple. The curved parts of the breast that supposedly makes them feminine and sexual? Yeah, you can show those. But not the nipple, even though it’s the same tissue as male nipples which are completely allowed, even in many public settings. This is me, happy, loving myself and my body. I am not trying to be “sexy.” These photos are not sexual. There is nothing inappropriate about them. I think they’re beautiful.

I notice our post about platonic relationships between boys has gotten a lot of traction, and there are a few things I would like to add:

1. There is absolutely nothing wrong with boys desiring other boys in a romantic or sexual context
2. I am SO HAPPY to see that many of you don’t feel any societal pressure to abstain from physical affection between yourselves and other boys!
3. I made that post for those who do, and for those who enforce as much.
4. All people of all genders and orientations should be allowed to feel comfortable with showing whatever amount of affection they wish towards their friends as long as all parties are consenting.

– Mod Duck

10

“I’m in the first string now and I’ve been able to play alongside everyone. I was even allowed to experience victory. This goes beyond happiness. It’s like a dream, I can hardly believe it. And as I was thinking about this, the person who was the cause of all of this appeared before me. So I’d like to take this opportunity to say, it’s all thanks to you, Akashi-kun. Thank you very much. It’s because you extended your hand to me then, I am who I am today.

“…I didn’t do anything. It’s true that I called out to you on that day because I sensed that you had potential. But from that point, you made your way with your own strength. In fact, it was because of your strength that we won this year. I should be the one thanking you.”

KNB END ft. Akakuro

MIRAFREED WEEK 2017

  • BANNER COMMISSIONED TO: @beaglecakes (full art credit to her!)

In order to commemorate another year in this fandom and Mirafreed as a ship, certain event many love is about to take place soon; I am glad to anounce MIRAFREED WEEK 2017! It will take place from February 1st to the 7th!

The prompts are the following ones!

  • Day 1: Angels & Demons
  • Day 2: Raijinshūu & Strauss Siblings
  • Day 3: Modeling
  • Day 4: Flowers
  • Day 5: Lipstick
  • Day 6: Babies
  • Day 7: Happiness

Rules and more information under the cut!

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Only Mine

Requests: “Could you make a one shot where the reader and klaus are married and they go out dinner and the entire time the Waiter is flirting with the reader causing klaus to become really jealous and angry so when they get home he fucks her in order to claim her and show her who she belongs too. Thank you I really love your blog”

“Order anything you like, Love.” Klaus grinned at you from across the table. You nodded and picked up your menu. You were married to Klaus, and he decided it would be best to take you out tonight. 

“The steak looks really good.” You pointed out and Klaus nodded. He was in a surprisingly good mood. “You seem really happy today.” You smiled to him. 

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I’ve talked a little bit about this before (can’t find the post tho RIP), but I think it’s just another example of Nate’s streak of idealism.

The game tells us plainly that Nate and Elena made a verbal commitment to one another not to take dangerous (or illegal) jobs anymore - that means no more warlords for Elena and no more heists or thefts or obsessive tracking for Nate. Elena takes this as “we will do things that keep us happy and safe.” Nate takes this as “I am literally never allowed to think about or talk to anyone who says something dangerous or mentions illegal activity.”

One of the people who now fall into Nate’s definition of “regular life” is Sully. He can’t make jokes about Sully scamming anyone, or chat about his latest jobs, or give him advice about artefacts or historic pieces he comes across without Nate thinking that he’s breaking his promise. Nate’s so scared to fuck up (callback to: “everything I touch turns to shit”) that even enjoying the company of someone he loves and waxing nostalgia about the Good Old Days might tempt him, and that Will Not Do. Nate doesn’t want to risk even daydreaming about his old line of work because he doesn’t have enough faith in himself to keep himself safe and be happy with Elena.

Important to note that again, Nate is entirely putting this pressure on himself. Sully’s not calling Nate and begging him to do jobs with him, and Elena actively encourages him to let loose once and a while (“I really think you should take [the Malaysia Job]”; “you should call Sullivan. You haven’t seen him in what, two years?”) because all of these things still fall under her definition of “regular life” (which is a closer and more healthy way to approach it, I think).

Nate’s got a long history of self-esteem and identity issues, with some obsessive tendencies thrown in for good measure. Him not seeing Sully for two years is just another product of this; Elena is one of the best things to ever happen to him and he *so* doesn’t trust himself to not fuck up their relationship (as he’s done in the past) that he’s willing to avoid Sully and force himself to never think about anything slightly illegal or dangerous—even at the cost of his own mental wellbeing, inner peace and relationship with his adoptive father.

tl;dr is that Nate tries waaaaay too hard to Adult properly that he thinks never talking to Sully again and lying to his wife is the Right Thing To Do.

Good and earnest intentions with a shitty outcome, which I think sums up Nate’s character pretty well.

Miyuki is shocked/lowkey jealous/sulky about Mura's skinship with his friends in Nagano

I mean Eijun’s is naturally touchy feely in Seidou but when they visited Nagano this one time, the skinship was on a different level and Miyuki iS JUST

UMMMMMM?!?!?!?!?

He’s conflicted like sHOULD I ALLOW THIS?!?!

As his boyfriend, aM I ALLOWED TO BE WHINY ABOUT THIS!?!?!?!?

lmao give him a scarf eijun

I need someone who needs me. I need someone who is positive and will put effort into everything. I need a girl who will let me be the one to explore her mind. I need a girl who will know my thoughts and know me better than myself. Who will spoil me sometimes and show me her passion. I need a girl who is strong but is brave enough to be honest and vulnerable. I need a girl with lots of energy and patience because I am everywhere. I need a girl who will go places with me but always knows at the end of the day I am home. I need structure and someone to keep me in line. I need a girl who is a hopeless romantic, someone who will sweep me off my feet. But I just want a girl who is going to prove to me that there is such thing as love
—  I need

As an Indian, not even Indian American, who watches agents of shield, I am thrilled that Vijay and Ellen Nadeer are a major part of the plot in this half of the season. Both actors are of Indian origin (it is SO GREAT to see Parminder Nagra on my screen again) and they don’t have weird-ass American accents when they say Indian names and words, because no Indian settled in America worth their salt would allow their kid to not be able to speak their mother tongue properly. (okay this is probably an exaggeration, but I’M JUST SO HAPPY OKAY.) I DIDN’T THINK I’D HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS ABOUT THIS

misc. text message starters ( nsfw + tw )

[ text ]: i’m bleeding
[ text ]: you whole ass
[ text ]: i hate the youth
[ text ]: satan is an alien
[ text ]: i cant even kill myself
[ text ]: i’m such a bag of dicks
[ text ]: why am i allowed near things
[ text ]: i’m stealing my neighbor’s car
[ text ]: you shit all over my happiness
[ text ]: i think someone’s in my house
[ text ]: can u give me a reason not to die
[ text ]: i’m still gonna masturbate though
[ text ]: brb i’m about to get my face fucked
[ text ]: peroxide gets blood out of clothes right
[ text ]: if you don’t get here within 20 mins, i’ll die.
[ text ]: why do i have 37 missed calls from you???
[ text ]: are you really breaking up with me through text?
[ text ]: i just wanna get rawed so hard by a giant dude that i die
[ text ]: ur such a stupid cunt [ text ]: im sorry that was really uncalled for
[ text ]: i thought there was a bug on my arm but it turns out i’m just black

2

A YEAR!!! It’s been one year since I’ve decided to start my vegan journey. going vegan has helped me in so many ways, nourishing my body, mind and spirit. Veganism has also allowed me to raise my consciousness and shift my perspectives. I’ve never been so at peace with myself, physically and mentally. I’m finding new things to love about myself everyday. Not only am I helping myself, but I’m saving countless animals, and the planet!! Practicing love and compassion for every living thing, every single day, brings such a rewarding sense of happiness. I am way happier this year than I have ever been, and I will continue to find contentment in every aspect of my life. Here’s to all the animals I’ll save and the self goals I’ll exceed this year. #BeKindToYourBody #BeKindToYourEarth #SaveTheAnimale
🌍💓🐮💓🐷💓🐔💓🐣💓🐟💓🐰💓🌍