“Where do you think I would have been all these years, if I had not known how to act?”
I think it is a very interesting statement, and its honest. He is indeed acting. But when is he acting, to whom? And when is he really himself….only Severus Snape? Sometimes I got the feeling he confused himself with that…..
In all those discussions about Snape beeing bad or good or evil or anything between….there is always one word that bothers me. Its that: yes, but he did everything out of selfish reasons. What the h…? Yes, there are his own interests- his wish for forgiveness and redemption in it. Nothing bad here, quite the opposite, I think. To have the wish for that means, you are not completely lost to the dark side. But what they really try to say is, I think, “yeah, he made some good deeds, but not to help others, because he is bad and so he is automatically selfish”. But his good deeds, to try to protect and rescue others do help others. Usually we say, those are really great and good deeds. So why degrade what he did by calling him selfish? I think there is no real fair reason for that. Not to forget for that he is risking his own neck over years. Again and again. All he could gain by that is in his own head. Redemption, forgiveness.
His worst war is inside him.
( selfishness: caring only for oneself, concerned primarily with ones owns interests,benefits,wellfare, regardless of others)