always on my mind

Everyday, in the back of my mind you’re there. Some days, you’re the only thing I think of and I search desperately for something else to take my focus. Sometimes I can distract myself and somedays I stay in bed going between crying and laughing as I’m overwhelmed by memories of who we used to be. You’re there constantly, even when I don’t contact you for weeks and it seems as though maybe, just maybe I’ve moved on… I haven’t. You’re always on some part of my mind.
—  Excerpt of a book I’ll never write #180
Sometimes I forget my own name.
I forget the numbers in my address.
I forget the names of friends and family.
My brain is fuzzy, it’s moving so fast.
Words spill from my mouth with little control from me.
I forget their meaning as they leave, half aware of my own thoughts.
But always in my mind: stamped; burned; inscribed; written; echoed; carved; over and over, your face.name.smell.touch.taste.voice.
No matter what I forget, it’ll never be you.
—  K.wills