always feel overwhelmed

Do you know...

I haven’t read a book in days? I haven’t listened to music in days. I don’t even remember when I last even ate a meal alone. Went to a museum. Saw a concert. I can’t even recall the last movie I saw in the theater.

I love all those things.

Haven’t been able to do any of them. It is starting to kick in like a kind of withdrawal. I’m not happy. I don’t know that I want to be. If that makes any sense. People around me just annoy me. I like the spawn well enough, but always feel entirely overwhelmed by the notion of how I fit into their minds.

It’s all just…blah.

I suppose that makes me depressed. Stupid to be depressed when I have so much goodness and abundance at my disposal. When I was poor and miserable I would tell myself, “You won’t be like this when you’re better situated.” That was a foolish thing to think.

Today I sewed something by hand for the first time in literally five years. With an actual needle and thread. Turns out I can still thread a needle with quadruple and tie a quilters know with my eyes shut. That fast. You’d think I was directing a symphony, but there’s the thread waiting. It’s built into me now. And even when I am miserable and ache…things like that are there. Even when I can’t go backward or feel anything, I can still chop celery. Or stare into magnified precision, or work a simple screwdriver. Wandering around fixing things, tending things, cleaning things. An automata. Till everything rights itself and I have the capacity to feel things again.


He’s, doing his best , 

When you're in love with a....
  • Aries Venus ♈: You'll never have a second to breathe, but that will feel amazing; it'll be like you're always on your toes, always learning new things about this amazing, wonderful human being. Yes, they will test you, they'll push your buttons and let you push theirs, but you will never feel so excited as you are when you're around them.
  • Taurus Venus ♉: This love will truly behold the definition of bliss, pure bliss in fact. "Love goggles" have never been so true when you are in love with a Taurus Venus because you will forgive all of their flaws as they will be so truthful and apologetic. A love truly mesmerising.
  • Gemini Venus ♊: This person puts the fun in your life. When you are without them you can't do anything but feel bored. This can cause you to feel incomplete without them at times too. This love will be like lightening roaring through your veins.
  • Cancer Venus ♋ : This kind of love is a hurricane; Cancer Venus are unpredictable in love but you'll love it. Nothing will fail to surprise you and you will have never felt so loved. Be prepared to give everything you've got, because they'll be expecting it. This love is a triumphant one.
  • Leo Venus ♌: This kind of love will feel effortless at time, almost like you're floating along with the biggest smile across your face at all times. You will find yourself dumbfounded by their presence and absolutely defensfless by their words, this can lead to some embarrassing moments, but it's a love you couldn't recreate.
  • Virgo Venus ♍: This seems to be what real love feels like. This love quickly consumes all of your waking days and becomes the air in which you breathe. It gives you energy and a spark in your eyes, but be careful not to disappoint this lover as second chances are rare. This love will send you into second heaven but will still feel like you're standing firmly on the ground with both feet.
  • Libra Venus ♎: You will almost always feel an overwhelming happiness. Your heart will feel like it's beating out of your chest at times and you might want to throw yourself at them arms open, more than you want to admit. You might struggle to always agree with their abstract opinions but your burning love will sort itself out in the end.
  • Scorpio Venus ♏: This love feels full, there is nothing more indulgent and crave-worthy than this love; you won't be able to get enough. When you look into their eyes you'll feel a connection, a fierce, true connection. You fault might be not trusting them even when they've only told the truth. This is a love that truly satisfies the heart but tests the mind.
  • Sagittarius Venus ♐: As cliché as it sounds for stereotypes this love is an adventure; you might feel like you never get a chance to sit down. Its not just physical adventure that you'll experience but an adventure to learn more about you.The grass seems greener, the water colder and the air fresher with them, it's a love you'll never want to leave.
  • Capricorn Venus ♑: A fairytale, not an old one with a princess or prince charming but a new one, where you don't exactly understand where the point was that you fell in love but now you're so deep you can't swim to the surface. A love that event the very last moment you'll come running back for. Be weary of how many times you might have to be forgiving, but this is a love you've dreamed of before.
  • Aquarius Venus ♒: This is a sweet love. Like have a best friend who you can hug and kiss and do whatever you wish with. An exciting experience as you slowly but surely become each others entire universe. This is a love where you will always feel complete even when they aren't with you physically because you know that you have more than just love; the bond of a friend or family.
  • Pisces Venus ♓: This is a certain love; you will never have to doubt their feeling for you and you know they'll never fail to pull of the most romantic, heart melting gestures without even realising. Understand they will put you edited them,and this is a hurdle you must face together. This is a love that you never want to leave as you never felt so loved in your entire life.

or: Four Times Moana and Maui Surprised the Crowd, and One Time They Did Not

My first shot at a 4-and-1 type gig! I tried to keep these short, but you know my writing, that didn’t end up happening. I think this is like seven thousand words total. Look, my hand just slipped for four hours straight. 

Happy, happy birthday to my dear friend @paperjam-bipper! You’re so old now, you shmuck. Congratulations. Hope you enjoy the gratuitous amounts of fluff I stuck in here, just for you. :) 

Fandom: Moana
Words: 7,400
Category: Gen
Relationship: Moana & Maui

Summary: Four times Moana and Maui surprised the crowd, and one time they did not. 


It’s when the first wave breaks on the deck of their ship that Aronui decides, quite firmly, that she does not like storms.

Even shielded as she is from the worst of the rain by her mother’s sturdy legs and swollen belly, there pellets of water sting against her eyelids, and Aronui has to squint to see the deck of the boat mere feet in front of her. Her hairband was lost long ago to the frenzy of the wind, which whips her hair around her face. When Aronui spares a hand to try and tame it, she ends up nearly ripping off the right half of her head.

“Hard about to port!” shouts a familiar voice, commanding against the fury of the storm.

Aronui looks over to see Moana astride the canoe. Despite the writhing waves that tower around her Moana looks at ease, balanced perfectly atop the edge of her canoe while wrestling with the halyard in both hands. She’s planted at one end of her tiny craft, which sways dangerously in the water, and is somehow using the boat’s instability to clamber up the side and look intently at Kara.

Keep reading

Yamaguchi doesn’t really like to read minds. He always feels as if he’s invading people’s privacy. But, sometimes, he simply has to do it. What happens, when he tunes into some random person’s mind on a crowded train, though?

The poll is rather popular, here goes the winner (32%). The second fic was really close behind it.

Also - this is my 50th work published!

SFW, TsukiYama
Words: 1286
Also on ao3.

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Guys there is definitely something wrong with my body. My mental state has been getting worse and worse despite my improvements in my self care. I’m taking the supplements for the deficiencies I know I have and I’ve been eating better and spending more time outside and.. admittedly not sleeping on a better schedule but I’m getting *more* sleep than I used to.

And my brain is getting worse. Like noticeably worse. Day to day I can feel my mental state declining. My brain fog is rapidly worsening, focusing is somehow even more difficult, my memory is failing me more and more, I’m finding it increasingly impossible to process new information…

My body feels awful too. I have a constant headache and muscle weakness and I feel constantly fatigued.

And I don’t think this is because of my mental illnesses. My actual emotional symptoms have been more manageable than they’ve ever been. I don’t think this is directly related to my illnesses.

There’s something wrong. This is a noticeable difference from what my head and body felt like a year ago, even six months ago. Something is wrong and I’m afraid it’s going to prevent me from being able to finish school or hold a good job.

Reunion Scrapyard Makeout

I will never get over the reunion scrapyard scene. Its just the way they’re sat together in labourers clothes, far more alike then they’ve ever been, putting in some hard graft. Sitting impossibly close despite the stretches of space, just having casual banter, back and forth conversation. Its slightly out of character the amount Aaron talks, almost as if its Danny delivering lines, but its actually putting up a facade for Andy and Paddy. The constant stream of words continues as they walk away together with a natural sway to their strides mimicking one another like animals two by two. 

Then as soon as they enter the scrapyard portacabin both of them visibly relax as Robert leans against the door sexily and Aaron’s shoulders come down to rest with a sigh. Robert’s voice drops an octave and fills the room with a lightness and soft tone that’s both entrancing and soothing. Aaron seems entirely consumed by his presence, his body naturally leaning towards Robert. Robert too is thrusting his hips, his body begging for Aaron. 

When Aaron takes charge and totally engulfs Robert’s space I always feel so overwhelmed. Aaron’s dominance is charged with an urgency and aggression that is sexy and so Aaron. The way he attacks Robert’s jacket and tight white top pulling them off him is so desperate, like he needs Rob’s bare skin now. Robert’s eagerness is bordering on adorable, the way he helps Aaron get rid of his own clothes is strangely cute, like they’re sharing the workload again. The way Robert is grinning so cheekily, like he;s absolutely chuffed just to be in Aaron’s company again. When they do actually get their kit off Aaron presses his hand against Robert’s bare waist, his hand looks massive on Rob’s little tummy. My favourite thing though is through that whole manouvering they refuse to remove their lips off each other. They continue kissing repeatedly, mercilessly, like they’re making up for lost time. Even once Rob’s white top gets pulled over his head there’s not even half a second before they reconnect and reattatch themselves to one another. 

Then we see them getting redressed. I was surprised to see Aaron putting his jacket back on, I kinda presumed he only ever took his top off in really private moments when they’re in bed and Robert begs him. so I’m guessing Robert just pulled his jacket off him so he can appreciate those muscled biceps in his t-shirt. Robert is so much more blase about getting everything back on, taking his time, letting Aaron memorize his body. 

I’m not even going to get in the territory of Robert asking Paddy so kindly “not to give Aaron a hard time, because he doesn’t deserve it”, because that officially killed me and revived me. 

anonymous asked:

Is this your first job? I'm 22 and I haven't had a job at all and now I feel like I've waited too long and it's going to be harder for me and idk what to do. I have really bad depression & anxiety and I'm also in college

kinda sorta, my first job is at a daycare a few days a week that i still work. the theater i work at too, but i just started working there in february. i was really nervous when i got both of them, i’m 22 too and i always feel an overwhelming sense of being behind everyone my age. i’m not even in college. but i quickly took to both jobs, and at the theater especially, everyone has a different situation and there’s no judgment. try not to feel like it’s too late, because it really isn’t. if you want a job and think you can handle it, then just
try and apply to some places and go from there. the initial anxiety i had when starting work is gone now, i’m used to work and it’s a really nice feeling. it’s not too late for you, it’s never too late to try. good luck!

leejinklies  asked:

first impression: unattainable super cool and SUPER nice talented shawol who's Professional with the blog and all that jazz; current impression: pun dad who loves to torture her children with those #receipts whenever the opportunity arises, also rick rolls, but mostly receipts (still nice and cool but pun dad always comes first in my heart) ✨

OH GOD, SOAPS PLS. UNATTAINABLE? in what world would i be unattainably super cool, i’m like that one flyer that’s always being handed out that everyone ignores on the streets bc it doesn’t say anything useful HAHAHAHA. but the current impression, i’m proud to have cultivated. listen, rick rolls bring relationships together, look at what it did to ana and jae?? also, these receipts are the only way i stay hip with you young’uns. b l e a se, y are you the actual sweetest sophie, you’re always so cute and wonderful and just all around nice what the heck, ily

what was your first impression of me VS your current impression of me

Before this girl came into my life I wasn’t a huge fan of animals. I was neither a dog nor a cat person, in fact both kind of scared me. Then my mum and sister found this girl at the dogs home and a month later (we had to agonisingly wait because she was on heat at the time and needed to be desexed before coming home) she was part of the family, and suddenly this furry dog was my best friend. She helped me find my love for animals, made me laugh more than anything else in the world, and has given me so many good memories over our 12 years together. Best friends come in all shapes and sizes, and often they aren’t even human. I have to say goodbye to this girl soon, but I will always feel an overwhelming love for her and hold the memories of her closely to my heart.

Being in a relationship with Calum would include...
  • first things first…so many and i mean SO many philosophical talks at 3 AM
  • fight me on that one
  • hearing his raspy morning voice fUCK
  • lots of experimenting
  • lots of nudes
  • making a sex tape its bound to happen alright
  • praying it doesn’t get leaked
  • ‘can we get a dog?’
  • ‘cal we already have one’
  • ‘but y/nnnnnn’
  • ending up with 3 dogs before you’re even married
  • ‘who needs kids our puppies are cuter’
  • having kids anyway
  • him asking you for feedback on songs
  • you watching calum write and being so in awe of what he comes up with
  • asking him to go with you to get a tattoo
  • him getting one while you’re there just for the hell of it
  • netflix n chill
  • bc duh
  • him being shy in public but so fun and happy when alone with you
  • being there for him always even when he feels overwhelmed by all the fame n shit
  • ultimately being his home and where he feels safest
  • you two literally being so in love and just so damn adorable everyone wishes they ended up as happy as you

Luke  Ashton  Michael