always dresses in style

I alternate between drawing the Batter with hair and without as the picture demands and I was talking to my sister about it once and she’s pretty sure he’s bald and while that makes sense I still picture what he’d look like if you removed his hat then and I’m just like

Put it back.

Ryder Character Questions

Just some fun character development/get-to-know-them questions! Warning, there are some basic spoilers.

  1. The basics! Whats their full name, gender, and sexuality? Describe their general appearance and/or include a picture. Is there anything you canon beyond what the game allows?
  2. Can’t always wear Initiative whites and blues, Whats their dress style like? Do they prefer casual wear, or being in armor? Is it the same as it was in the Milky Way? How, if applicable, has it changed since arriving in Helius?
  3. Do they have piercings, tattoos, or notable scars? Do they dye their hair, or is it a gene mod?
  4. What’s their personality like? How do they feel about being Pathfinder? How do they change, if at all, over the course of the story?
  5. What’s their preferred profile, or class? Were they naturally inclined towards combat or technical skills? Were they a developed biotic, or did they first experience it with SAM?
  6. Canon says they served in the Alliance before joining the Initiative, do you keep this canon, or have you made some changes? Explain their backstory either way.  
  7. Everyone’s got one… List their (or your) favorite powers, weapons, and armor sets. Any special reason for these choices?
  8. Its all in the family. Explain their relationship with Alec, Ellen, and their sibling. If you changed anyone’s names or added a different sibling in your canon, explain why.
  9. What’s their favorite memory they have of their sibling? Of their parents?
  10. How have they dealt with the aftermath of Habitat 7? How deeply does this effect them?
  11. As they unlock the memories, how does this change, if at all, their view of their parents?
  12. Explain the way they feel about their squadmates, both initially and over the course of the story.
  13. Explain the way they feel about the rest of the Tempest crew?
  14. How about Nexus leadership and the people on the Nexus in general?
  15. What were their reactions to the Angara and the Exiles? How did learning there was a whole new species in Helius affect them? How did news of the rebellion affect them?
  16. What about their interactions with the Kett?
  17. Did Ryder fall in love? If so, with whom? What drew them to that person? Would their sibling approve?
  18. What does Ryder do in their spare time? What are their hobbies and interests? Do they share these with their friends, or are they more private?
  19. How do they feel being in command of the Tempest? Whats their favorite part of the ship? Least favorite?
  20. How about driving the Nomad? Are they a good or terrible driver?
  21. How do they feel about their connection with SAM? What’s their views on AI in general? Knowing Milky Way history and the attack on Eden Prime and the Citadel a recent memory, did the Geth influence this view? Does their view on SAM change?
  22. Favorite world they landed on? How do they feel getting to be the first human to step in many of these places?
  23. How do they feel about the Remnant? Are they worried? Curious? Simply accepting of what they can do with it?
  24. Do they ever wish they could just return to the Milky Way? Do they miss anything in particular about their old home? Did they bring anything special with them? 
  25. How do they feel about what they’ve accomplished in Helius? Are they proud? Worried? Do they feel positive about the chances for a cluster-wide unity? If they could change anything that had happened since everyone arrived in the cluster, what would it be and why?

Feel free to reblog, but do your fellows a solid and shoot them a number to answer first. 

compliment sentence starters.

’ you always know how to find that silver lining. ’
’ has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are? ’
’ you have the whitest teeth! you’ve got a hollywood smile! ’
’ you have the most beautiful eyes i’ve seen before. ’
’ i love your hair so much, it’s so pretty. ’
’ you have the best laugh in the universe. ’
’ you always dress so fabulous! you’ve got so much style! ’
’ you’re the best at anything and everything you do. ’
’ you are the smartest person i know! ’
’ sometimes i wonder why you’re my friend. ’
’ you’re the best friend anyone could ever ask for. ’
’ you always seem to have a solution for any problem. ’
’ you are the most attractive person i’ve had as a friend. ’
’ anything looks good on you! you’re perfect! ’
’ you always make the days a little brighter for people. ’
’ you’re like, really loved and adored, despite what you think. ’
’ anyone would be lucky to have you as a girl/boyfriend. ’
’ you’re going to make the best parent one day. ’
’ one day, you’re going to make someone so happy. ’
’ ever since i met you, i’d been the happiest i’ve ever been. ’
’ you are the perfect role model. ’
’ you deserve an award or something, you’re that great. ’
’ you did so good on that art work the other day! ’
’ that speech was phenomenal, left me speechless. ’
’ you’ve got an amazing face and i just want to stare at it all. ’
’ i could stare at you all day and never get tired. ’
’ you are the better looking out of the two of us. ’
’ you’re the smarter one out of the two of us. ’
’ you always smell so good. what perfume is that? ’
’ i’ll only get a make over, if you’re the one who does it. ’
’ i’d trust you with my life any day. ’
’ you have the biggest heart out of everyone i’ve ever met. ’
’ you are just the sweetest person ever. ’
’ you are so creative! i could never be that original. ’
’ your ideas are so beautiful and original, i love them. ’
’ you really do make a fantastic meal, the best i’ve ever had. ’
’ this is so delicious, oh my god, you’re amazing. ’
’ you do not need make up to look beautiful, you were blessed. ’
’ why does everything you buy fit you so well? ugh. ’
’ you give me so much inspiration. ’
’ you inspire me so much, i’ve always looked up to you. ’
Toothbrush - L.H.

Okay…so I (obviously) got this idea from listening to Toothbrush from DNCE. I’ve also decided I want to update every Friday so every time I finish something, I’m just going to queue it up. Enjoy

Also…I know I said no more Luke pieces for awhile, but this literally came to me in class and I wrote it in fifty minutes so….

Luke woke up early from the sunlight pouring in through the window on the other side of the room, body still bare from the night before, the only thing covering him being the stupid little close to nothing sheet resting on his hips. His bright blue eyes fluttered open slightly, heart sinking as he sat up confused as to why the body next to him had disappeared at such an early hour of the day, the clock reading a mere 6:17 in the morning, no longer confused when he heard the toilet flush from the bathroom just down the hall…unless it was Ashton of course since he was the usual prospect that would be up this early in the morning.

He ran a hand through his tousled hair, bringing his palms down over his face rubbing the tiredness from them slightly as he waited for his lover to return to the room.

“You’re up early,” she mumbled seeing him awake as she leaned up against the door frame, arms crossed over her chest as she looked over the tired man’s features, a lazy smile gracing his perfectly pouted lips. She had on his torn Nirvana tee, the fabric falling to the tops of her thighs, and with the way she was leaning against the frame, he could see her favorite pair of navy blue panties from Victoria’s Secret. Her feet were still bare, probably having lost her socks in his sheets through the night, as she always did, even though she refused to take them off before falling asleep. He’d always loved her sense of style, but he always thought she looked best dressed in his shirt with no pants on laying in his bed.

Her hair was still a mess, sticking up slightly in awkward directions, most likely extremely tangled and in desperate need of a pound of his conditioner to comb out the knots before she left. Her eyeliner had run across the side of her face lightly and he was sure there was glitter on his pillows from her eye shadow as well, small love bites gracing the length of her neck, small enough for him to miss if she had her hair styled the right way covering them perfectly. It was a sight he always loved, even if she did look like a hot mess. She was his hot mess.

“Luke, are you listening to me?” she asked smirking slightly knowing he wasn’t. He never was when he was looking at her like that…not that she knew exactly what that look on his face was, but she knew it enough to know he was lost in his train of thought.

“Not at all, sweetheart,” he hummed leaning back against his pillows, arms making their way behind his bed as his muscles shifted slightly, eyes daring her to make her way back to bed with him, and she knew she would. “Close the door love.”

She did as she was told, feet padding softly against the dark, hardwood floors as she climbed into bed right over to him, swinging her leg over his hip so she was straddling him, as placed strategically against his pelvis, knowing damn well if she wanted to at any point in time she could change the entire mood.

“What were you saying?” he asked, hands making their way to her thighs rubbing the soft, bare skin lightly leaving goosebumps behind.

“I said I can’t stay long. I’m working at eleven,” she said running her nails down his chest lightly, up and down, over and over, Luke shivering slightly at the feeling.

“That reminds me..I need to talk to you,” he mumbled, hands slowly making their way to her hips as he ran his thumbs in small circles under the fabric of his shirt along her bare skin.

“What about, rock star?” she asked, brows furrowing together confused, not sure if she should be worried or not. Usually he’d just come out and say it, not making it a big deal unless it was something important.

“Well…I mean…we’ve been doing this for what…five months now…?” he asked stumbling over his words as she giggled slightly.

“Six,” she she said smirking slightly. “Where are you going with this Lu?”

“Well, I was thinking…that maybe you could like…leave some of your stuff here so when you do have to go in the morning you don’t have to leave so early…” he suggested making her heart melt as she smiled softly at him. “Like..maybe that coconut shampoo you have or your toothbrush…”

“And maybe some clothes considering I can’t really work in your tee and panties,” she teased as he blushed more. “You’re too cute, you know.”

“Are you going to answer me or just make fun of me?” he pouted as she leaned in pecking his lips quickly.

“I’ll bring them over when I see you tonight.”

The Bad Guy (Thomas Jefferson x Reader)

Originally posted by diggstrash

Pairing: Thomas Jefferson x Reader

Requested?: ‘Tjeff with #45 “everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy"’ (@predomina-buna)

Prompt: "Everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy”

Words: 3200+

Warnings: Southern Motherfucking Democratic-Republicans, Fluff, High school setting, Prom



“Stay away from Thomas Jefferson. He’s nothing but trouble for a sweet girl like you.”

That’s all you’ve been hearing from your new friends at Monticello High. You transferred there because of your old school upstate was shut down because of sanitary violations. Your family moved from Albany to New York City in order for you to go to school here. You knew your cousins were attending here so you knew you were going to be safe. You didn’t have many friends so your cousins, the Schuyler sisters, introduced you to their friends and you connected with them. You were really good friends with Eliza’s boyfriend Alexander and Alexander’s gay friend John. The rest of the group were cool and really nice to you. You always talked with them regularly and sat with them at lunch. You were all a big happy family.

That is until you met the Southern Democratic-Republicans.

The Virginian duo and upstate New Yorker that made this trio of chaos were the first things Alexander decided to educate you on once you entered the group. Alexander had a really hostile past with the trio of Juniors that ran the school Debate team and Government class. He would pinpoint each individual member and speaks about them in a hushed tone.

Keep reading


i had a dream about the pastel edits… @d&p i’m begging u pls… (follow my ig: @shoujodan)

As a trans nonbinary, I always wonder how to dress to make myself look more androgynous. What clothing styles should I avoid, what shoes will make my feet look less delicate, how do I hold my self in these clothes. And as I thought harder about these things I realised that my concept of androgyny was a very masculine concept. That you could only look and be androgynous if you wore men’s clothes and dressed like a male would.

So when trans day of visibility came along, I wanted to dress to show my androgyny. So I put on my button up, suspenders, and bowtie, and didn’t even put on moisturiser. But then I saw another nonbinary friend starting their first dose of T (testosterone) (second friend this month. I’m really happy for them!). And I felt rather odd.

You see, so many nonbinary people who are AFAB (assigned female at birth) go on T so they look more androgynous. And I started to feel kind of obligated to go on T. I felt guilty that I didn’t want to go on T. I started to feel guilty that I liked wearing clothes that are assigned to females. And it just crashed on me.

But I think it’s wrong to believe that the only way to look androgynous is to look more masculine.

I enjoy wearing more feminine defined clothes and my they/them button. I like wearing dresses with my sports bra (only thing I have as a binder) and wearing no makeup and big shoes. I like wearing a button up and bowties with bright lipstick. I like switching everything up.

I’ve been struggling with this all month. Did this make me a bad nonbinary? Why didn’t I always dress to the societal expectations of androgyny? It started to really weigh on my mind and I started to feel really awful.

But then I met a fellow nonbinary like me. They look androgynous but sometimes wear more feminine clothes. Or their androgyny looks like a mesh of feminine clothes to create their comfort. It was like a breath of fresh air.

So for today’s TDOV (even though this is being posted on April first, I have been writing it since around 11. Words are hard), I am visibly accepting myself as a valid nonbinary human that has both a masculine and feminine androgynous appearance.

Be whatever kind of androgynous you wish to be. Either way, you’re valid.

unhappyhemmo  asked:

i was wondering the main differences between INTP (which the test gave me) and INFP because i've done a lot of research and i'm very much both???

Alrighty so I think I actually have 20 asks about this same topic. It’s time to do some explaining.


*Quick summary at the ending*

So at first glance, the INTP and INFP are basically the same person. Both are intelligent, creative, and somewhat shy. They’re the quiet geniuses behind so many things in our society.

First thing’s first: Cognitive Functions. If you’ve been reading about MBTI for more than a day or two, you’ve probably seen all the little “Ni, Fe, Ti…” things, and, yes, that’s a key player here. 

INTPs have Ti > Ne > Si > Fe 

INFPs have Fi > Ne > Si > Te

If you have no idea what those are, please direct yourself here. 

Anyway, once you have a basic understanding of each cognitive function, you will realize Fi and Ti (the dominant functions of each type) are different because…well, one is thinking and one is feeling. But it’s surprisingly hard to differentiate between these when analyzing yourself and others. 

So how to tell the difference? Here we go.

Ti vs Fi

  • Users with Ti seek straight facts and logic for their internal thinking system, whereas Fi users seek “what is right” for themselves for their internal harmony (i.e. personal values). Ti users will likely be book worms and Wikipedia addicts whereas Fi users will be more into drawing and fiction (books, cartoons, movies). That’s not to say there’s no overlap, but picture the nerd in class who researches physics for fun vs the kid who’s always doodling cute cartoons and flowers.
  • Users with Ti will often be more apt to be “weird” in the eyes of society; they care little about social norms and will thus wear clothes that may not be popular or fashionable (or acceptable…I mean who else wears a neon mario shirt with olive green cargo pants?). Fi users will often have their own sort of personal style or fashion; they are nearly always the notorious “hipsters” or “emo kids” because of the dress styles they use. Other varieties exist, of course.
  • Ti users are logical and suck at emotional processing. Fi users are emotional and affectionate but may suck at explaining their feelings verbally, but they understand them perfectly. Ti users just…..don’t…..

How They Are Similar

  • So we established Ti vs Fi, so how are they similar? All the similarities are from Ne.
  • Ne makes both types creative and funny. Both like art and learning, videogames and books, and cartoons and movies. A lot.
  • But don’t get caught up here! Focus on the differences to differentiate.

Fe vs Te

  • There are the inferior functions of the two types, with Fe belonging to INTP and Te belonging to INFP. These are the “achilles heel” of the types; their ultimate weakness (Kryptonite!!)
  • INTP struggles with Fe in that they, like aforementioned, they are not super keen to social norms or what is socially acceptable. They are not very good at expressing emotion or feeling emotion except for in extreme outbursts. That’s not to say they cannot feel emotions, but they do have trouble with them. 
  • INFP struggles with Te in that they often stress out a LOT. And it’s often about their own character. When Fi, which makes personal values of the utmost importance, fails, Te overrides sometimes and “tells” the INFP that they’re a failure, that they can’t do anything right. 

So you have to ask yourself the question…which are you? Ne>Si as the interior functions make it hard to differentiate at times, so you have to take the most dramatic examples of each type–the stereotypes–and decide which you are most like. If you lean towards being the moody hipster who writes poetry and cries a lot, you’re likely an INFP. If you lean towards the kid who cannot stop playing League of Legends, cannot stop memeing, and cannot stop wearing the same Hogwarts/Mario shirt, then you’re likely an INTP. 


Zijun Li, Le diable matou || 2016 Cup of Russia (x)

I’m just gonna say it: I love Emma’s wedding dress. (x)

Aside from the fact that I’ve always adored that style (both my grandma’s wore similar dresses for their weddings) but also because of the inspiration.  Grace Kelly is famous for many things but one thing that people may immediately know her for, alongside her Hollywood career, is her marriage to Prince Rainier III of Monaco.  She had no ambitions to be royalty (Hollywood royalty perhaps) but the woman from Philadelphia became just that because she fell in love.  Princess Grace was the fairy tale that little girls dreamed about.

Now we know full well that Emma has no desire to be a princess of any kind.  She got a taste of that life in the Wish Realm and found it lacking, for many reasons.  We also have an idea that she’s not the biggest fan of the clothes from the Enchanted Forest if her wrestling with that corset is any indication.  What she does seem to enjoy though is dressing up for the occasions that warrant it.  The main example is her first date with Killian.  For the first time we saw her really opening herself up to the romance and the potential of what could be and her dress reflected that.  It was soft, in both color and design, and showed that she really cared about how she presented herself to someone she could truly see a future with.

Which brings me to her wedding dress.  Emma, growing up in the world without magic, wouldn’t have had many encounters with princesses and elaborate gowns outside of movies and television.  Even then, with her upbringing in and out of foster homes, the shine and romance of them might have worn off long before she could romanticize them for her own hopes and dreams.  It’s only because of Henry finding her, reuniting with her parents, loving and being loved by Killian that she’s opening herself up to the dreams and fantasies that many have had for years.

Emma would probably reject anything that even closely resembled the dresses she’d seen in movies, especially ones of the Disney persuasion.  She also probably wouldn’t consider anything that reminded her of the dresses in either the Wish Realm or the Enchanted Forest.  They aren’t her worlds, even if she was born in the latter.  It wouldn’t be far off to say, though, that she would want to look like a princess.  Just not one that you could find in a story book.

For her, the first princess to jump into her mind would be Princess Diana.  Look how quickly she jumped to use the name Prince Charles during her and Killian’s trip to the past.  Princess Diana was and is still known as a fashion icon and her wedding dress is iconic.  Yet, even if Emma didn’t remember the dress in exact detail she would most likely almost immediately dismiss the possibility of it being her dress.  I mean look at that thing:

Originally posted by rememberdiana

A quick Google search would have been enough for her to decide that there was no way she was getting near a dress like that.  Then, maybe in the results of that search or from some distant memory she might remember a princess named Grace.  One or two clicks later and she would find this:

Simple yet elegant.  Beautiful and soft.  Regal and modern.  A princess but not a spectacle.  Perfect.

Emma Swan has found a wedding dress that not only embodies the grace and bearing of a princess but one that doesn’t overwhelm or overbear the strength of the woman wearing it.  It’s a dress that somehow encapsulates the magic and romance of a woman who became a princess not because she wanted it but because it was meant to be.  A dress perfect for a woman who is marrying the man she loves.

I know this dress is sparking up a lot of debates, sneers or smiles, and probably a lot of dissections like this.  I didn’t write this to bully people into falling in line with me.  I just had a lot of thoughts about how I feel about it and I wanted get it down.  I love the dress, I love Emma in the dress, and I’m sure I’ll be a mess when the episode airs.  The Savior Princess is marrying her Pirate Hero and I couldn’t be more elated.  Even if they were both wearing potato sacks.


It is time for the next series, which I’m really excited for bc this is so different from what I believe BTS is like, it’s gonna be a player/fuckboy type of series bc that series won the poll so without further ado, to start us off as he always does is one member of the hyung line, a total sweetheart with such a goofy personality, I love that Jin has come out of his shell so much recently, I love the flying kiss bit he does all the time, I love seeing him be loud and not be afraid to make weird faces I just love him, Kim Seokjin aka Jin (also happy Transgender Day of Visibility!!)

  • This is gonna include a bit of college!Jin (here) just to set the scene a bit more
  • Okay so I gotta do some visuals first bc I’m so ready for this shit
  • Choppy fringe!Jin is cute as fuck but I’m gonna throw the war of hormone look into this bc it is such a good look, it was fluffy haired!Jin, it was puppy!Jin, it looked so cute on him
  • He has a stage where he dyes his hair blonde and everyone is super heart eyes and then he dyes his hair gray and everyone !!!! bc have you ever seen gray haired!Jin that’s some good shit
  • Jin is such boyfriend material, from the way he acts to the way he dresses
  • He’s got a super cute style, he’s always in these really comfy looking clothes but when Jin wear black jeans mmhmm that’s some top quality shit but then again, anything Jin is top quality
  • He can make any outfit look niCE that should be considered a talent at this point bc he could probably wear neon pink and still look adorable and boyfriend as fuck
  • There’s this one airport outfit that he wore that i s fuckboy!Jin, it looks like it may be from the Danger era?? idk but he’s in these black jeans and a white t-shirt with what I assume is the brand name on it and he has a black snapback and some black sneakers and he even had a lil backpack and it’s just wow 10000/10
  • Typically he does for the sweater and jeans look but occasionally, the snapbacks come out and
  • I don’t think Jin would ever purposely play with people’s emotions just for the hell of it so he’s not the type of fuckboy that just wants to hit it and quit it or drag people along
  • He likes to date, that’s his thing
  • He has a different date almost every time and things never get serious bc he’s got his major to focus on
  • He mainly goes on dates to help de-stress bc he gets to go sit down and talk and get to know people but things never go past the third date bc that’s when his dates tend to start asking the “are we together” question and he hates having to say no
  • Typically, what happens is he spends a week with his dates, he’ll take them out on one or two dates within the week and then try to dial it back to friendship again or sometimes have to cut it off if they don’t wanna be friends
  • He’s never been in a serious relationship, all of his relationships have been just casual, we’re kinda together but we’re kinda not type of relationships
  • He’s the type of player that you don’t realize is a player at first
  • Like he’s so friendly and sweet and he really is genuine about his interest in his dates but it’s just he doesn’t want anything serious and he’s not afraid to make that clear in the nicest way he possibly can
  • He doesn’t enjoy the “breaking up” part, sometimes he’ll even do his best to keep things friendly so his dates can’t even fully tell if it’s a date or if it’s just two friends hanging out 
  • No one seems to hate him despite knowing very well he’s got another date already planned and he builds a reputation of casual dating so typically, people going on dates with him know that it’s not gonna go far
  • Of course, he’s had a couple of people who are less than happy with him for disappearing after the second or third date
  • He is a sweetheart, he’s always such a gentleman about everything, he opens every door, pulls out every chair, always brings a flower for his date, he just doesn’t take things very seriously
  • He’s a really friendly kid so it doesn’t take long for people to grow interested in him and start flirting and he joins in and things just go from there
  • A bit of a flirt tbh
  • Loves winking when he notices someone looking at him, blows kisses at his dates, super affectionate all the time
  • Jin is such an affectionate person, he loves having his arm around someone, he loves hand holding, he loves giving their cheeks lil kisses, he’s a really charming person naturally so when he actually tries to be flirty it’s game over, they’re head over heels at that point
  • He’s a cooking major so he uses that to his advantage and will prepare picnics for his dates or make dinner/lunch bc there’s something really romantic about a home cooked meal on a date
  • You two are friends, he’s not your best friend in the entire world but he’s always fun to sit next to in classes, you’ve had more than a few together and he always seems to end up in the seat next to or behind you
  • You’ve heard about his reputation, that he doesn’t really call back after a couple dates and that he’s always got something planned with someone
  • So when he starts acting a bit more flirty in one of your classes, you don’t think much of it and ignore it for the most part bc you already know if you do go out with him, you’re gonna really really like him and it’s gonna sting when he cuts it off
  • But it’s also really hard to not develop a crush on him when he’s so goofy and sweet and gentle with everything he does, he grabbed your hand to help you out of your seat once and his hands were so warm and soft and he squeezed your fingers before letting go and all you could think about was holding his hand bc that’s a really nice thought
  • It’s the day of finals and Jin offers to make you some dinner to celebrate making it through finals season and you figure since summer’s coming up and there’s not a hu ge chance that you’ll get another class with him next term, you might as well go for it
  • He’d been flirting with you all term, which he’s not fully used to, normally people are pretty quick to say yes to the date so he does get a bit flustered when you say yes and that’s actually really cute to see Mr. I have a different date every week blush and get this huge smile on his face when you say yes
  • He sets up this cute lil date area on the rooftop of his apartment complex, he has some fairy lights lighting the area up, he has a big warm blanket with tons of pillows, he has dinner all ready to go and he’s actually kinda nervous??? since when does he get nervous he does this shit all the time this is nothing new to him
  • He’s s o sweet the entire date and it’s really personal bc it’s just you two and the view with the blanket and pillows to cuddle with and you find him really funny and you say yes without hesitation when he offers a second date and then that turns into a third date
  • After that third date, he finds himself still texting you, which is also v e ry new, he doesn’t try to be platonic, he doesn’t try to cut things off, he just keeps flirting and planning more and more dates and it turns into a summer romance and now it’s his turn to ask the infamous “what are we” question
  • “If you promise I’ll be your only date, I’d say you’re my boyfriend”
  • “I can definitely do that”
The Wedding Dress

Title: The Wedding Dress

Author: @jensen-jarpad

Characters: Jensen x Reader, Gen, Brianna and Kim

Word Count: 526 - sorry :(

Warnings: None

A/N: This was written for Ash and Jill’s Birthday Challenge ( @eyes-of-a-disney-princess and @sis-tafics ). My prompt was “The one with all the wedding dresses”. I hope you guys enjoy it!

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

What's the meanest nickname you ever gave someone?

Okay, so I’m gonna tell you the nicknames plural, but first I need to tell you about the guy I used them on because if you don’t understand what he’s like, you might think he didn’t deserve every horrible thing anyone ever said to him. 

There was this guy I hated at my college. The first time we met, he saw that my messenger bag had a picture of Mandy Patinkin as “Che” in Evita made to look like the iconic Che Guevara image. When he asked why it wasn’t actually Che, I said it was because I’m a huge Mandy Patinkin fan and then said “plus Mandy is way less controversial.” He literally screamed at me for implying Che Guevara had done something to be controversial and asked “are you even a communist?!

He dressed “steampunk” but this mostly involved wearing a tweed jacket and and bowler hat everywhere. Sometimes the jacket would be lime green instead, and sometimes the hat would be a stetson or a civil war style hat. He always wore dress shoes specifically because he liked seeing people straighten up in their seats when he walked in the classroom because they made him sound like a professor approaching. Note: there’s nothing wrong with this aesthetic, but he could not pull it off. 

One time, I was hanging out with some cool folks I knew and one of them happened to be dating the only person who could stand to be his friend for more than two months, and earlier in the day a security guard gave me a nice umbrella from the lost and found, with like a wooden hook handle. He asked me if he could have it, for free, and I told him no, I needed it to get home, and he ONCE AGAIN screamed at me “come on, man, you know that’s totally my style.” Later, he pulled me aside and told me the rest of the group was too polite to say it but they all hated me and wanted me to leave them alone. A few months later all the folks at the table told me they were actually all thinking that about him

He was also horrifically racist, often advocating for ethnic cleansing in classes. He was a raging misogynist, openly expressing his hatred of women and ending every argument with “are you on your period?” He kept a photograph of his own penis on his phone so that, whenever someone questioned his manhood, he could show them. That part always confused me, because like, he was willing to sexually harass people by exposing his genitals to them without consent, but apparently didn’t bring his actual penis with him because he had to show them an easily-doctored digital photograph? I’m not saying he should have whipped out his actual dick but I’m surprised he didn’t

He was in my World War II class and on the first day he told one girl his plan was to “only show up on days with quizzes, tests, and papers, leaving once he turns them in, and getting straight A’s anyway.” Anyone following this strategy might not have read the part of our syllabus saying our professor’s attendance policy, which was that you don’t get credit for a quiz, test, or paper if you leave right after you hand them in, and after a certain number of unexcused absences you lose the entire 20% attendance and participation grade, meaning at the end of the semester he had an average grade of 0%. 

For the final paper of the class, we had to write a paper on one of the books from a list provided by the professor, and the syllabus said it had to be a book IN ADDITION TO our assigned textbook and collateral texts. Because some of our class texts were on the list of acceptable books, I accidentally wrote a paper on one of them without realizing it wasn’t allowed. About a week before the paper was due, I asked the professor just to be sure, and he made an announcement clarifying that it wasn’t allowed, and reiterated it in the remaining class sessions. Guess who we hadn’t seen since the last test and wouldn’t see again until the next paper? 

Dude turned in a paper on the main class textbook. The professor gave everyone who made this mistake a week’s extension to fix it, but this dude sent the professor an angry email stating that he would not be rewriting his paper and would gladly “rather take a zero” because he felt the professor shouldn’t have said the main text was allowed (he actually explicitly said it wasn’t allowed) and that he “hadn’t learned a thing about World War II” in the class, which we all pointed out was probably because he’d never been to the class. The professor was actually so shocked by the email that he removed this dude’s name and sent it out to the class and explained to us that he doesn’t actually need the papers and he gave us extensions because he wants us to pass, so not turning it in isn’t hurting anyone but us. 

Anyone who disagreed with him would, without fail, result in no less than five minutes of sulking. He would literally stay in the area so he could give you dirty looks while he was upset at you. My personal favorite was the time people were debating with the religious zealots shouting on campus and he kept shouting unfunny jokes, and the bible-shouters were using him as an example, and finally I heard a bunch of guys saying “he’s worse than the bible dudes” and “if that dude says one more thing I’m gonna kick his ass” and I finally told him to shut up, that no one thought he was funny, and that he was hurting more than he was helping. He sat down and sulked on a bench for twenty minutes while glaring at me and telling his friends I’d been mean to him for no reason. 

Okay, so now that you know about this person I had the displeasure of crossing paths with so many times, here’s some of the many mean nicknames I came up with for him:

  1. The Victorian Error
  2. Sweeney Toddler
  3. Jack the Ripper’s Amish Cousin
  4. Beadle Bamford (I know this is two Sweeney Todd references but he really looked like Beadle Bamford)
  5. Professor Dickpic
  6. Guy who wears your granddad’s clothes but doesn’t look incredible
  7. Greasy Beardmouth
  8. Captain Pube-beard
  9. Beardface the Hostile Leprechaun
  10. That pile of sweaty hats that hangs around Chris

Bonus: After the final for that World War II class I was talking to that professor and three of my classmates (who are women) and I told them about that dude’s tendency to end arguments with “are you on your period” and my classmates spent five minutes describing and miming how much they wanted to punch this guy in the testicles. In front of our grinning World War II professor. Who was holding the final exams we just finished taking under his arm. 

Venus in Scorpio

You will be incredibly sexually magnetic. You may not necessarily be “pretty” or commercially attractive but you will draw people in with your raw sexual power.  You tend to keep a very natural look and usually don’t wear a lot of makeup.  You may dress in dark clothing. You may cover your whole body with clothes just to keep people guessing what you look like under there. You may also dress in form fitting clothing that accentuates all of your sexy parts.  You can be many body types but your figure will always scream SEX! You look great in black and dark reds and blues.  You can also look great in white. You usually have a very cool and unique style of dress. Your style is always very original and uniquely “you”.   You will usually have deep watery eyes and a flirtatious smile.  You do not always have many friends. You will stick to yourself and the people you trust the most.  It takes a lot to win your trust.  And it will be extremely difficult for you to forgive if anyone ever violates your trust.  You are very loyal to your friends. You are always honest and will always have their back in a caring and supportive way.  You are extremely perceptive and always see into the heart of every situation, so you usually give great advice. As a friend, you are insightful and able to understand your friends as plain as day. You may appear to be off in your own little world, but with a single comment, you can let them know that you notice every detail and you most certainly can keep your secrets. In relationships, you are extremely loyal and passionate. You have very high standards and are very selective.  Your passion is not “showy”. You don’t open up and show affection easily. Your passion is a silent, deep well of never-ending commitment and loyalty. But even if you love them, you will not open up to them easily. You remain mysteriously reserved until you decide to trust them. If they earned your trust, you are capable of deep tenderness and open intimacy. If you love someone, you will risk anything, even your own life, for them. You are extremely protective of those you love. You express love on an emotional level.  Nice talks, activities and even physical satisfaction are all very pleasant, but without emotional depth, you will lose interest. If you’re truly interested in someone, you will try your best to get inside their head, and know them completely. However, it won’t be quite as easy for you to reveal everything about yourself. You want intimacy, and yes, you like sex because sex can be the ultimate in emotional closeness, possession, and bonding. But, even more than a physical, sexual relationship, you want to know they are really yours. For you to be sure of their commitment to you, you need to understand them. This isn’t an intellectual understanding. It’s an understanding based on feeling. Words can lie, and physical acts can be performed in a hollow fashion. Feelings are much more accurate, and once you understand theirs, you have the intimacy you desire. You want to be able to look in their eyes and understand what kind of day they had. You want to be able to read their soul without using words. Your desire to be close on an emotional level makes you vulnerable. It’s the unfortunate side effect of getting close, and you don’t like it. Generally, your recourse is to try to control them to avoid getting hurt.  If you can steer the ship, it won’t crash. Control makes you feel safe from harm. Of course, this doesn’t always work out in your favor. It’s impossible to really control anyone, and when people are intimate, feelings do get hurt. It’s inevitable. Your love is not lighthearted, nor playful, but rather heavy and serious. For you, it’s all or nothing. Many potential partners are turned off by such a heavy type of love. You feel in extremes: you either love them deeply or hate them deeply, never anything in the middle. You never forgive. You are capable of hating them with the same level of passion as you once loved. You are capable of cold-hearted, bloody vengeance if they cross your invisible, psychological line.  You do not blow up like other people; rather, you silently premeditate your vengeance. They will never see it coming. After that, reconciliation will never be possible because you never forgive. They will be “dead” to you. You never feel guilty because you believe they deserve any pain you inflict on them. You can leave them for dead without looking back if they break your trust. Since trusting is a problem for you, you may stay single and lonely by choice. You may even choose to stay single until you find your soulmate. You can wait a lifetime for the one you want; you don’t change your mind often when it comes to love. You are not tempted by pleasure because you don’t mind a little pain. You are not attracted to flirting or casual hookups. This makes you probably the most faithful one. You want to love only one person your whole life. You can be obsessive about this. However, you will cheat on your partner without flinching if they are not “the one.” It’s important for you to know if you can deal with your partner sexually before you can proceed to any deeper emotions with them.  You love sex at a very instinctive level. You are very natural at sex and your partner has to have a lot of natural sexual ability too. You don’t like anything fake in bed and you can tell if someone is not really into it. Your love-life will always be scarred with a touch of pain or death. You may even literally have a fetish for pain or death; you can be a masochist, sadist, suicidal, and/or antisocial. Sex and relationships with you can have the power to heal, or at least transform, both partners in some way. This can only happen after some form of death or loss in your relationship.