talk to me about dean teaching sammy about sex and things that feel really goood but maybe should be kept secret
it started off as innocent little things, ya know. or at least seemingly innocent things.
sam walked up to dean one day and tucked his head underneath dean’s arm and stayed there because dean felt like safety. he felt like home. and whenever sam would come home with homework, dean would always be the one to help him, to teach him. it’s how it’s always been.
so it only seemed natural for sam to come to dean one day, crawl up next to dean while he was lounging out on the bed watching some rerun of “the twilight zone” and sam asked him, in that sugar sweet voice of his, if dean would teach him how to kiss. of course, that first time dean said no because what else was he supposed to say? it wasn’t like he was going to agree to kiss his little brother, no matter how much he wanted to.
sam didn’t really understand why it was wrong or if he did, he didn’t show it. instead he just shrugged his shoulders and nestled into dean’s side and was content on watching whatever black and white film was currently playing. he said “it’s okay dean, we don’t have to do it now if you don’t want to. you can show me later.”
and dean knew, that no matter how wrong it was and that if he were to do this then he would be burning in hell, that one day he was going to show his brother.
it happened much sooner than he thought, actually. they had to go to the library because dean had to pick up this book for this research paper that he had to write that was worth 20% of his english grade (not like he cared but dad at least pretended to so he had to turn something in) and he dragged sam along with him (not that sam minded. the kid loved libraries). so dean let sam wander off to the kid book section while dean went to go look for some book that was remotely close to the topic that he was writing about.
when he found sam some thirty minutes later, he was chatting away with the very nice, very elderly librarian and before they left, she handed sam this cherry red lollipop that sam immediately started licking on.
dean watched, the entire walk back to the motel, the way that sam’s pick little tongue would snake out past those perfect, pink lips and lick at the sugary treat and the way that every now and then sam would moan around it like it was the best thing that he had ever tasted and all at once dean wanted to taste the lollipop on sam’s tongue.
they get back to the motel and sam is still sucking on the lollipop, making all these little happy sounds because they don’t normally get candy and dean is trying his best to ignore his little brother but he can’t.
suddenly he’s in front of sam and sam is staring at him with these wide, hazel doe eyes, still planting little kitten licks to the red candy.
“you still wanna learn how to kiss, sammy?” dean asked, all breathy because quite frankly he was out of breath. he was propositioning his baby brother who was too young, too innocent, too naive for something like this, using his childhood nickname.
sam’s eyes only seemed to get wider when he processed what dean said, head bobbing up and down, mouth still wrapped around the lollipop and the first time that dean tasted his brother was with that sickly sweet taste of that cherry lollipop.
after that, sam came to dean to learn more stuff. and dean, having already seen the hellfire and walked past those gates with his head held high, taught sam everything he knew.