although it's only my imagination ;.;

A proper addition to the #BeThe5thChallenge

Chapter 28: Rowaelin Reunion (Rowan’s P.O.V.)

For the wonderful @delaneyjanuzzi ! She asked for the Rowaelin reunion in Queen of Shadows. I hope you like it!

This is my first time writing in first person point of view, so please bare with me if it’s a bit iffy. Thank you @acowar for beta reading my stuff :D

Characters and dialogue are not mine. All copyright of Sarah J. Maas.


After much consideration, I have come to the conclusion that I absolutely hate ships.

Well, specifically cargo ships.

It was only a few days ago that I had stowed myself away in the hold of a vessel bound for Adarlan. It was easier than I had thought, considering my size. Although it did come with much frustration. After half an hour of shifting around and repositioning myself in the confined space of the cargo area, I finally settled as the ship made its way towards Adarlan, more importantly, towards Aelin.

Time slowly became a figment of my imagination on this blasted ship. The only thing keeping me sane as a stowaway was the thought of Aelin, how she would react upon seeing me- upon realising I had disobeyed her first command to me and come to her, and what she would do if she knew that her absence had been a weight on my heart since I had last seen her. Whatever I did she always found a way to occupy my thoughts once more. This was unsurprising, of course, considering that there were absolutely no windows or entertainment in the cargo area. The only thing feeding me light were the small holes from the deck above. A senseless decision on my part to stow myself away, but what can a Fae do when he knows he would be unwelcomed at the destination.

The ringing of bells from above suddenly resonated through the cramped space, pulling me away from my thoughts. Thank the Gods. That meant the ship was finally docking into Adarlan.

Finally. Finally. Finally.

While unfurling my legs as much as possible into the tiny space in front of me, I debated what my next move should be upon leaving this damned ship. Aelin had mentioned multiple times that there was no magic in Adarlan, therefore my steps had to be formed properly, with no defence mechanism other than the weapons I had strapped to my body.

It was the loud clamouring from above that pulled me away from my thoughts this time as I realised that I had to leave before someone found me. That means I would just have to make my plan as I go. Crawling through the narrow space between the bulky shipments scattered around the lower deck, I unlatched the hook of the trap door that I used to first enter the lower deck back in Wendlyn and pulled myself out swiftly. The shouting of the men assaulted my ears further as they move frantically from one side to another, trying to arrange where everything should go. Taking this as an opportunity, I quickly made work of shifting into my other form, only for my breathe to be taken away from me and my vision to blur. Only then did I remember once more the one thing that made Adarlan stand out amongst other continents.

Adarlan had no magic.

My limbs suddenly felt lighter as I stumbled through my steps before finding my balance. Everything was still blurry around me as my sharp vision was turned dull. It took me a few seconds, or was it minutes, to finally reorientate my eyes to the area around me. The men were still running around on deck, unknowing of my presence.

Get out. Get out. Get out!

Taking in my surroundings once more, I made quick work to leave this damned ship as I leaped off the front edge and onto the planks that made up the dock. Walking as fast as I could away from the ship, I tugged my pale grey hood over my face, looking down at my boots as I neared the edge of the dock where it merged with the city.

Faster. Faster.

The dock led to a market which I hurriedly pushed myself into, shouldering the people that were going the opposite direction. Only when I thought there was enough distance between the dock and myself did I relax- slightly. This was a new area after all, a continent I barely know about. There was only so much I can relax without caution.

The lack of magic within my body was something I knew would take me awhile to get use to. My body was lighter, my vision and hearing duller than it has ever been, and my shifting abilities taken away from me. All these things I have grown to live with since I was young was stripped away from me in a matter of seconds.

For Aelin. You’re doing this for Aelin.

The thought that it was all for her put me easily at ease. For Aelin, I’d be willing to do almost anything; even if we didn’t have the blood oath between us.

The market area was just as loud as the docks, even louder if I could say so myself. My hood remained over my face, concealing me from the public’s eyes and, more importantly, my ears. If anyone here were to know I was Fae, they’d send me right to the King of Adarlan before I could find Aelin.

Gods, please let Aelin be safe. Please let me survive her wrath upon disobeying her orders.

Setting down the path in front of me, I continued to push through the crowd of the Adarlan market and towards the slums. Aelin had proudly mentioned back in Wendlyn that she had- has, a home in the slums. One she used often when she was still Celaena Sardothien.

It was ridiculous to think how long ago that was.

Asking for directions was already out of the question. It was best to keep to myself as much as possible. The less people know, the better. I’d just have to rely on my senses now, no matter how dull, on picking up the scents of the slums.

Finally breaking through the crowd and into a more secluded area, I rushed my steps further before it became too dark to travel. It wouldn’t be such a complicated feat for me to travel in the dark, but after being confined in that blasted ship for so long in the partial dark I’d like to see something brighter for once. Inhaling the air around me, I noticed how the once sweet smell of pastries from the market was turning more and more putrid by the second.

Good. I’m closer to the slums.

The slums weren’t exactly like one would imagine once I entered the area. It still had buildings like the rest of Adarlan, it was just simply more degraded; and more filthy, to be honest. Pleasure houses littered the streets, the bright lights outside the building flickering on and off from overuse. Taverns and gambling houses were next placed in between the pleasure houses like they’ve been there for far longer. The previously rancid smell of the slums was replace almost immediately with opium upon going deeper within the area. They seemed to be coming from the taverns. Opium dens underground, I’m guessing then. A loud ruckus came from the buildings as doors open and closed while people enter and leave. Shouting and cheers combined together as one resonated through the night air of the slums, either from winning or losing their bets in the gamble houses. Men and women stumbled around the streets, either dressed in expensive garb or in cheap clothing. But they were all looking for the same thing in the slums: a release.

Pulling my hood farther down my face, I tried to catch Aelin’s scent as I walk. Of course, this took longer than it would’ve been if magic was permitted in Adarlan. My senses were duller than ever and the smell of opium seemed to overtake any other scents lingering around.

Damned opium dens.

For once in my life, I felt more exhausted than I ever was. Being crammed on the lower deck of a cargo ship then being stripped of my magic was something that was bound to take a toll on me at one point. I just wanted to find Aelin, to make sure she was alright, to help her in whatever she needed here in Adarlan despite her anger at me for disobeying her.

I hope she doesn’t get too angry.

You’re over a century years old, Rowan. And you’re afraid of a mortal girl? My mind seemed to mock me for my thoughts.

Shut up.

While trying to pick up a scent, I thought of the many ways Aelin might react. Of course I came to Adarlan for a reason, but it was more on my part wanting to see her above everything. I just hoped she would listen to me before lashing out. But at the same time, her anger would be reasonable as I did directly disobey her orders.

After an hour of wandering between the streets and alleyways, trying to form what I was going to say once I found her, a familiar scent finally hit me- Aelin’s scent. It was something I could never mistake: jasmine, and lemon verbena, and crackling embers. A scent that fit her so well in so many ways. Rushing my steps, I followed the sweet smell as it led me towards a more secluded area of the slums. The streets were finally quiet as less and less people were present as Aelin’s scent strengthened with each step.

Find her.

Find her.

Find her.

Fog from the, now, starless night air grew all around me as I slinked through alleyways and shortcuts. Nonetheless, I kept my hood over my face, determined to pull through without having to expose my face. Aelin’s scent grew as I walked through an alley near a tattered apartment building.

I paused. Faintly, I could hear her voice approaching, closer and closer towards the alley I was hidden in. It was mixed with another voice- two voices to be specific: a male and a female. The fog concealed my view of what’s in front of me so I couldn’t see who she was with. I was relying entirely on my hearing.

Then, suddenly, silence. The scrape of their boots stopped and the sounds of their voices disappeared.

Did she notice? Did she scent me?

Did she scent herself on me? She had to.

Even with my dull senses, I could hear one of them, probably the male, pull out a knife from his pockets. A male. The Fae inside of me growled at the thought that there was an unknown male with Aelin. From my sense, he seemed to be a demi-Fae. A warrior, maybe. That only eased eased my frustration slightly.

Go to her.

Go to her.

Straightening myself, I walked out of the fog that concealed me while my hood remained over my face. My steps were confident, assured as I tried to upstage the male with Aelin, but cautious at the same time. I prepared the dialogue of what I was going to say in my head, making sure that I had all my reasons in check to explain to my queen.

But, apparently, I didn’t need to.

Before I could utter a single word, a small sob sounded through the night before a familiar body crashed against me, her arms wrapping themselves around my neck as tears ran down my surcoat. My arms wrapped themselves around her automatically, missing the feeling of her against me. I buried my hooded face in her neck, breathing in her sweet, sweet, scent that I had missed so much in Wendlyn.




It could’ve been minutes, or it could’ve been days, but I stood there in the slums, holding her up as she cried quietly against me. I revelled in the feeling of her, finally having Aelin near me once more- being able to hold her at night, tease her, train her, worship her.

My Queen.

Aelin was shaking, her arms only tightening around me rather than loosening. I didn’t let her go either, I didn’t want to let her go.

“How did you get here? How did you find me?” Aelin pulled away farther enough to face me, her face tear streaked but her expression, Gods her expression.

She was happy. She was happy.

I gave her a smile, the ones that I reserved only for her and no one else.

“You made it clear my kind wouldn’t be welcome on your continent. So I stowed away on a ship. You’d mentioned a home in the slums, so when I arrived this evening, I wandered until I picked up your scent.”

I’ve missed you so much, I wanted to tell her, I should have gone with you from the start. You should have let me stayed with you.

Every day without you was agony for me.

But I didn’t voice any of my thoughts. Instead, I glanced around the area as my smile slowly turned into a frown.

“You have a lot to tell me.”

Aelin only nodded, her grip on my shoulders tightening as more tears left her eyes. Reaching up, I brushed a loose strand of her red hair that escaped her hood before gently cupping her cheek and caressing it with my thumb. She had a lot of explaining to do, first and foremost as to why her hair was red, but I couldn’t be bothered to ask her for specifics now. My queen was in my arms, and happy to see me.

“But you’re not hurt?” I asked softly, my eyes wandering over her face to check for anything different, “You’re safe?”

She nodded once more, burying her face in my chest as her arms went around me. My heart thudded faster as I wrapped my arms around her just like before. I gently buried my face on the top of her hood, breathing in her scent like it was a drug.

“I thought I gave you an order to stay in Wendlyn.”

My heart stopped for a second before I realised she was teasing me.

“I had my reasons, best spoken somewhere secure,” I mumbled against the fabric of her surcoat, “Your friends at the fortress say hello, by the way. I think they miss having an extra scullery maid. Especially Luca—especially in the mornings.”

She laughed. Oh, her laugh. I’d sail across every continent and kill everyone in the way if I could keep her this happy every single day. Aelin squeezed me tighter with her arms, crying once again.

“Why are you crying?” I tried to push her away, to see what was wrong, only for her to tighten her arms further.

Gods. This woman is strong.

“I’m crying,” she sniffled, “because you smell so rutting bad my eyes are watering.”

I let out a loud laugh, a real one that I haven’t had ever since she left. Finally, Aelin pulled away from my chest, flashing her grin at me.

She’s happy.

“Bathing isn’t an option as a stowaway,” I muttered, releasing her only to flick her nose. She shoved me, although I knew it was a joke from the grin that was still on her face. Glancing down the alleyway, I finally noticed the male and female behind Aelin as they waited for us. My eyes immediately assessed the male, realizing that he must have been monitoring my interaction with Aelin. Probably to see if I was deemed safe to her or a threat.

“Are you just going to make them stand there all night?” I asked Aelin.

“Since when were you a stickler for manners?” Aelin slung an arm around my waist, her grip on me unusually tight. But I wasn’t complaining. Why would I? Instead, I slung my own arm around her shoulder, pulling her close against my body.

I’ve missed you. I’ve missed you so much, I wanted to say but decided that it would be better said later when we were alone.

The closer we got to her two companions, the harder my stare became to the male as his stare became equivalent to mine. It looked as if he was challenging me to a duel. For once, I was in doubt which of us would win considering his build and size. But then again, my skills may be better than his so I may just win. I like to think I would.

Stopping in front of them, I continued to give the male a hard stare as we both refused to look away. I could practically feel Aelin rolling her eyes beside me.

Suddenly, I was forced out of the stare as Aelin squeezed my side. Hard. I hissed, pinching her shoulder right back for what she did.

“Let’s get inside,” she broke the silence, leading me away towards her apartment, I’m guessing. I vaguely remember the female saying her goodbyes and the male following us but my mind only thought of the woman beside me.

And, for now, that’s all I could ask for.

anonymous asked:

Is maladaptive daydreaming considered a mental disorder?? I read abuse in childhood is a major cause but idk can you talk about it from an astrological pov

I minor in psychology and I’ve never come across maladaptive daydreaming in the dsm or in my classes…it has only been acknowledged recently and there is caution in naming MD as a disorder because it can possibly be a symptom of another disorder or mental illness working as a coping mechanism. For example, it’s been linked with OCD and ADHD. There is also dispute that naming it as an official disorder stigmatizes natural creative thought; children normally daydream often for imaginative play and this helps with brain development. There is a currently an MD Scale released, so perhaps looking it up may help (although I hear it’s not public or its still being developed). As far as I know, MD is still being questioned and I think it needs a lot of consideration before being named as a serious disorder in such a short amount of time and with little research to back it up as such.

Someone with a lot of 12th house/neptune or Pisces influence are prone to using daydreaming as a form of escapism. A way to “cope” with reality. A lot of 4th house/moon and Cancer influence has the same effect…both houses are linked to the concept of dreaming and sleeping; the 12th house and the moon which rules the house of midnight (4th) are all the workings of the subconscious & inner depths of a person. So then one can conclude that Neptune aspects to the inner planets (especially moon or mercury) can daydream excessively, lots of fantasies of the mind.

Jupiter contacting mercury can cause grandiose thoughts, words and ideas. To a lesser extent then, the Gemini/Sagittarius axis may develop a “problem” with daydreaming. Although with the element of water, there’s a stronger and emotional connection with this pattern that makes it “worse” so to speak, and thus difficult to break from. No surprise, as Pisces/Neptune rules over addictions and Cancer/moon rules over psychologically ingrained habit…


Carl + You

Warnings:Swearing, Teasing

Carl POV:

Its been a month since I broke up with Enid. I told her I broke up with her because I thought she was cheating but really I only broke up with her because ever since y/n moved into our house 2 months ago I couldn’t keep my eyes of her. Although I knew Enid and y/n are best friends but i had to have y/n.

Enid is still avoiding me, I don’t blame her, I did accuse her of doing something she didn’t do and it was a pretty dick move but I did not want to tell her the truth, then y/n and I would be in trouble.

One night, I walk down the stairs to see y/n reading one of my comics and my dad (Rick) sitting on the couch watching tv.

“Hey” I say moving y/n’s legs to sit in between them both. Y/n moved her legs back up but on top of my lap.

“Hey what were you doing upstairs” My dad yawned. Y/n kept fidgeting her legs on my thighs making me go hard.

“Uh ju- just sh-showering” I choked on my words trying to keep in my moans.

“Are you alright kid?” Dad asked concerned looking me dead straight in the eye.

“Yeah, f- fine” I replied quietly while y/n still fidgeted. I could feel my pants get tighter, it was getting so hard to stay quiet.

“Well i’m going to bed and you guys should be going to sleep soon as well, Goodnight” he yawned again while lifting himself off the couch to make his way up the stairs.

As soon as my dad shut the door I let out a moan forgetting my surrounding. I felt eyes staring at me, I turned to y/n where she stared at me. She looked completely surprised.

“Uh I’m so sor- sorry, I didn’t mea-” I apologised before she cut me off.

“I’m going to sleep, thanks for the comic” She said standing up handing me my comic.

Shit. I’m an idiot, now she probably won’t even be my friend anymore. Fuck.

“Carl? Your comic” She said raising an eyebrow while holding the comic out waiting for me to take it.

“Oh uh th- thanks” I replied taking the comic.

Fuck, she’s going to tell Enid. As I turned around she was heading for the stairs. “Please don’t tell Enid” I panicked.

“Tell Enid what?” She smirked demanding for an answer.

“What I did” I answered looking down at my lap. I heard her come closer and felt her hand lift my chin up, forcing me to look her in the eye.

“What did you do….Carl?” She said tensely. kneeling down so we were face to face.

“I I mo- moaned” I muttered quietly.

“I can’t hear you Carl” She said glaring at me with her beautiful y/e/c eyes.

“I moaned” I answered more clearly falling deep into her pretty eyes.

“Yeah, I won’t tell her” She whispered into my ear. I felt as if she was trying to tease me on purpose now. She turned around on the heel of her boot and stood up aiming to go towards the stairs. I grabbed her wrist.

“Don’t go” I demanded pulling her closer to the couch. She smiled and put her hands on my shoulders as I grabbed her waist to lift her onto the couch. I lay her down on her back while kissing her soft lips. It felt as if i was in a dream, this was my dream, a dream come true.

Harry’s Twin


prompt; You’re Harry’s twin and date Draco behind his back

Being the twin sister of the ‘chosen one’, had both its perks and its downsides. For one, Harry loved me and would protect me no matter what, but at the same time, Harry can be slightly overbearing and well..overprotective. He insists it’s because he’s my “older brother” and that’s his job, but I insist that it was only by a few minutes, and that I could handle myself. Although I love Harry, his overprotective nature has made it extremely hard for me to keep my secret relationship with Draco Malfoy a secret. “Hey babe.” My boyfriend of one year, Draco whispers in my ear, while snaking his arms around my waist, pulling my back into his chest. I engulf his minty scent and his strong arms around me never fail to give me a feeling of comfort and security, but upon realising that we were in a hallway, I quickly pull myself from his grasp. He gives me his sad puppy-dog look that he always gives me whenever I react to his affection like this, which makes me want to run into his arms and kiss him passionately. Yet I refrain from doing so, knowing Harry-or anyone for that matter-could walk by and see us. “Draco..” I sigh exasperated, for this being the umpteenth time this week he’s almost gotten us caught. “You know we can’t do this here, Harry might see us.” I scold. He gives me a sad, heartbroken look, causing me to sigh, feeling bad that we have to sneak around like this in fear of being caught. I look around, before grabbing his arm and pulling him into an empty corridor. “Babe, you know that this is hard for me too but-” I begin before I’m cut off by my boyfriends soft lips on mine. “That’s all I wanted baby, and to see my beautiful girlfriend of course.” He smirks, as he slowly pulls away. I giggle and feel the butterflies in my stomach that I would always get when we started dating like during our first kiss, first date, and well-erm- other firsts.. but they never seemed to go away. “Skip class with me today, we can spend it cuddling in my room.” He insists, with a suggestive grin. I playfully hit his arm, but think cuddling with my very handsome boyfriend doesn’t sound so bad. “Okay.” I quickly say, before I can change my mind. His face lights up and he kisses my forehead, “meet my outside the common room doors in 5.” I smile and make my way down a separate corridor, in hopes of avoiding Harry. I successfully reach the Slytherin common room and Draco says the password, guiding us in. He wraps his arms around my waist, assuming our previous position, a habit I’ve noticed he likes to do. I rest my head on his chest and enjoy our moment alone-something we don’t get enough of. He ends the peaceful silence by moving his hands to my sides and tickling me mercilessly. ‘Dr-Draco st-stop!” I giggle out of breath, trying to free myself from his grasp. After a few more agonising seconds I manage to get free. I stick my tongue out at a laughing Draco, before running off to his room. He follows suit and runs after me catching me just as I enter his room. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me down onto his bed with a flop. We just lay beside each other while laughing and trying to catch our breath, enjoying the perfect moment. After awhile, he gets up and hands me one of his shirts, which ends just above my knee. I gladly accept it and change stripping myself of my uniform. He’s already removed his and changed into something more comfortable, motioning for me to join him in bed. He pulls the blanket back and once I’m in, drapes it over us both. I cuddle up to him, with my head on his chest and his arm wrapped tightly around my body holding me close. “I love you Y/N” are the last words I hear as I drift off into a peaceful slumber. 


I can tell you, 

with almost absolute certainty, 

that the boiling point of ethanol is 78℃

so we use fractional distillation to separate it from water,

with which it is miscible. 

But I can’t tell you precisely how missable

you are

so we’ll discuss the chemistry thing.

It’s easier that way.


perhaps it’s not.

Imagine you were water and I ethanol 

and the only way to get us—

no, to pull us apart 

was to turn up the heat,

to push me to my boundary

until I had to flee, 

in a vapour of incapability to resist

whilst you sat by, watching me literally


But, and I’m not sure if you knew this 

(you never did chemistry),

some of the water clings, clings to the seventy-eight degree fumes,

boiled before its time, 

the process isn’t called sublimation but it’s sublime 

to think that molecules — two H’s and one O —

refuse to let go

and then, in the column packed with glass beads,

return to liquid form, forced to flow free

flow free of love’s constraint

down and back to the rest of themself 

whilst the ethanol rises, 

lighter than air,

condenses in a beaker somewhere

and thus the two are pure. 

And purely alone.

I said it was easier to discuss chemistry. 

It’s not. 

@ ror-fucking-ry // via (@new-poets-society)

Um… it’s quite difficult to choose a highlight. But maybe it’s “From the Doctor to my son Thomas”: the short YouTube video that Peter Capaldi made for a little boy called Thomas Goodall who’d just lost his grandmother.
Quite apart from the fact that it illustrates the tremendous kindness of Peter Capaldi (although I know that all of the other Doctors have done similar things), it reminds me that Doctor Who exists not only to be entertaining, but to help children understand the world and its difficulties, and by extension, to remind us all to be a bit kinder, more imaginative and more human.
—  Peter Harness on his Doctor Who highlight.