also this is might be the only additional round thing i do

So about those space orcs...

I’ve seen a lot of posts about humans pack-bonding with frankly everything, no matter how big, scary, threatening, lethal or oozy.

But you know what I haven’t seen?

Humans entrusting their young to their pack-bonded friends. Because that’s a thing we do. We entrust our children to our friends. We entrust our children to our dogs. We befriend the biggest, meanest, scariest shit, and then we dump our defenseless, hasn’t-even-got-a-fully-fused-skull-yet offspring on them. Half for shits-and-giggles, half because it’s cute, mostly because children are exhausting and we need a nanny.

Keep reading

The Domestic Garden Witch: Gardening Without Plants!

So maybe you’re a college witch with limited space and money, limited to the one window in your dorm. Or, maybe you’re a witch without extensive backyard space who wants to start up a magical garden. Perhaps you’re a kitchen witch who wants the freshest herbs right at her fingertips.

For many witches, having a garden seems to be a bit of a no-brainer. After all, plants and magic go hand-in-hand. Plus, when thinking of a witch, it’s hard not to think of a cottage in the woods with a little vegetable garden out front. Unfortunately for the majority of us, our cottage in the woods is a tiny flat, and our garden out front is a windowsill with limited space.

This is when it comes time to embrace your craftiness and bring your garden indoors! Not only does it place your garden in a convenient location, it also allows you to freshen the air, recycle what would otherwise harm the earth, and embrace your witchy green thumb!

Sand and Meditation

Something that often does not cross an individual’s mind when they hear the word “garden” is the thought of a garden without plants, especially where witches are concerned. After all, witches are sometimes known for the sheer amount of herbs and plants they collect (hell, my boyfriend sometimes criticizes the quantity of herbs I have - not my practice, mind you, just the fact that I have over thirty varieties of herbs in large quantities in my witchy drawers). But gardens take all sorts of shapes and sizes, including that of the zen garden, Japanese rock garden, or meditation garden.

Unlike planted gardens, these are minimalist creations designed to help induce meditative thought and relaxation through the use of flowing patterns and stone placement which often are likened to mountains or islands rising up from the sea. They are generally designed as large features which are raked into different patterns each day, but are easily adaptable for the small amount of room our domestic garden witch might have!

Creating Your Garden

As with any indoor garden, perhaps the first thing to look into is the type of container in which you’d like to keep it. In this case, a dish that is wider than it is tall is recommended. Choose either rounded shapes or rectangular shaped dishes that are shallow yet deep enough to hold sand.

Fill this dish with sand - white is traditional, though colored sands can be found in local craft stores or dollar stores - until it is about half full. Select visually appealing stones and set them on the sand.

With a utensil, trace ripples into the sand - flowing lines reminiscent of water are traditional.

If you feel that you want a bit of plant life, small air plants are definitely helpful. Remember to design your garden based on simplicity. Use natural themes and variations in your design to provide an aesthetic that you find appealing.

Tools of the Rock Garden

Typically when you think of a desktop zen garden, you might envision one of the little kits that you can get as a novelty gift at Barnes and Noble. In these kits, there is of course a couple of little rakes - one for smoothing out the sand and one for providing the patterns.

We’re witches on a budget, though, so let’s take a different approach - one similar to what’s pictured above. While it is completely reasonable to use a fork or a pen to make the patterns, you can take bamboo skewers or chopsticks and turn them into rakes using wire. Using these, you can smooth out the sand and rake patterns into it each day or as often as the whim takes you.

How Can I Witch This?

Unlike all of the gardens I’ve written about thus far, this is a garden whose only maintenance depends upon what you need from a meditative standpoint. Its design is not only decorative, but spiritually functional. If you’re a witch who is still fairly closeted and can’t have an altar, gardens such as these make for excellent substitutions, as they can form a sort of sacred space in which you can meditate and focus your intent.

If you’re a crystal witch, these sand gardens are a dream come true! Instead of placing stones, arrange your grids in the sand and use the rake or skewer to draw patterns in the sand to help focus the energy of the stones in your grid!

Draw sigils in the sand based on your intent and either wipe them away with the rake, or incorporate those sigils into the design of the ripples!

Sands come in various colors and grades. Play around with options for your sand! For cleansing, use a fine black sand. For empowerment, use a fiery orange or red. For healing, use white or light blue! The possibilities are near endless!

Of course, I can’t leave out my fellow kitchen witches! Salt is a key feature of the kitchen witch’s lifestyle. So much so, in fact, that in some circles it is believed that it is bad luck to run out of salt. For this reason, you can replace the sand with salt! This has a couple of benefits: first, it’s inexpensive. Second, it acts as a constant cleanser - much like a quartz cluster or a rod of selenite. When the salt has become to crusty to rake into appealing patterns, it has done its work! Dispose of the old salt and replace it with a new batch! (Do not pour the salt outside! This is harmful to the environment! Instead, find a safer way to dispose of the salt - I usually use the salt to clean out my mortar and pestle, then dissolve it in the sink to drain away).

If you use salt in place of sand, you can take the crystal grid concept a step further! Place the crystals in your “salt garden” and rake as you would if it were sand. This provides a way to cleanse your crystals in a way that is also visually appealing!

Consider different ways to make this plant-less garden a magical addition to the dorm or coffee table!

And may your harvests always be bountiful!
Blessed Be! )O(

sonnetscrewdriver  asked:

Am I right in thinking some Celtic peoples practiced something akin to tattooing? I'm sure I've read stuff by Roman historians about it, so obviously grain of salt and all that.

They did, yes. Most likely body painting rather than tattooing, but then, it might have been tattooed in.

The common misconception is that they used woad, which, unusually, isn’t actually Caesar’s fault for once. Instead, it’s the fucking English, of all people. In the 1600s there was obviously that big mad scramble to colonnise the “New World” i.e. cyfe everything not nailed down, and England wanted to justify why it should get the indigo plantations instead of the Spanish on Moral Grounds (OH MY GOD I KNOW). So, Queen Lizzie One went ‘Hey, my granddad was Slightly Welsh, and that’s Celtic, and they used woad and also did tattooing, maybe that’ll work.” And so, they put about that woad - a relative of indigo - was what her ancestors had used culturally, and therefore indgo was part of her heritage.

It was not true.

The Insular Celts did use woad, that much is true, but they used it as an antiseptic, mostly. While it is a relative of indigo, it doesn’t produce anything close to the dyes you get from that one; the colour is similar, but not remotely as strong, and even with the best mordants it washes easily out of cloth. It was a medicinal plant, basically. There’s a theory that they would bathe in the stuff before battle as part of a ritual, but that was probably because it you’ve basted yourself in Savlon before running at swords and other pointy things, you’re much less likely to die of secondary infection (or, as you might perceive it, it means the gods have lent you protection.) And, of course, woad is an astringent. If you tried tattooing in an astringent, the best you could ever really hope for was semi-permanent bruising.

But, there are accounts of Pretty Blue Patterns on the skin, so PREPARE FOR TEDIOUS HISTORICAL CITATIONS

So first up we’ve got our boy Caesar, of course. Exhibit A, taken from De Bellum Gallico:

Omnes vero se Britanni vitro inficiunt, quod caeruleum efficit colorem/All the British colour themselves with {glass}, which produces a blue colour.

More on that in a bit. Next, Exhibit B, Claudius Claudianus:

Venit et extremis legio praetenta Britannis, Quae Scotto dat frena truci ferronque notatas/[This legion], which curbs the savage Scot and studies designs marked in iron on the face of the dying Pict.

Again, I’ll come back to that. Exhibit C is this sexy motherfucker:

Lindow Man! The most complete bog body found in Britain. I shan’t go into the debate surrounding how he died. That’s a rant for another time. The important thing here is the copper found on his skin.

So, let’s kick off. Caesar there is doing some Classic Caesar Bullshit, look - the only time the man ever came to Britain was to briefly do a meet-and-greet with a single south-eastern tribe in, like, Kent, before fucking off back to Rome, but he always was very good at ascribing the actions of one person to an entire people because Caesar was a massive fucking tool; so yeah, grain-of-salt. But it’s probably fair to say he was giving a good overview of a common practice in the south-east of Britain, at least.

And what’s interesting is the word he used for the colouring substance, which I have here translated as ‘glass’; but the word was ‘vitro’. Vitro was a contemporary-to-Caesar Roman blue-green glass, ver’ ver pretty:

- and, crucially, the major additive to create that colour was, in fact, iron(II) oxide. Let’s revisit Exhibit B: Claudianus’ Picts, who ‘marked their faces with iron’. For ages, historians interpretted that very literally, and thought they were practising facial scarification; but there’s a whole host of reasons why that’s unlikely, not limited to the potential to kill yourself with sepsis when you live in an arse-frozen Scottish highland with no NHS.

What seems more likely, it seems to me (and others, this isn’t just my theory)… Is that the Picts, much like the Insular Celts, were of course highly skilled metal workers, and therefore produced a lot of useful compounds in their forges that they realised could be used for pigments. Because these people were incredible metal workers, as we know:

If you’re that good, you have an extensive and highly skilled cultural knowledge bank around the raw materials you’re using, you know? You know what iron and copper and tin can do, though admittedly, I don’t think they worked out that copper poisoning was a thing.

We’ve found Romano-British cosmetics, incidentally, that back this up. In 2004, they found a villa that contained a half-used pot of Romano-British foundation made of animal fat, starch and, crucially, tin oxide. When rubbed onto the skin it makes you pale while leaving a light, powdery texture. It also, unlike the lead-based continental equivalents, didn’t corrode the skin like wax under a fucking candle.

So, step in Lindow Man! Copper deposits were found on his skin, and although decomposition has meant it’s not possible to see them exactly, they did tests to see it the copper was in the places you’d expect painting vs places you wouldn’t, and the results certainly supported the theory. I believe other bog bodies have just about had visible blue swirls, too.

And, unlike woad, you can tattoo iron oxides into the skin without issue. Technically you can tattoo copper in, but Lindow Man was most likely painted. I’d say that was just as well, since tattooing copper would kill you - but Lindow Man died horribly and violently and got chucked in a bog for two millennia, so ultimately, I doubt it made much difference to him. Though, a bonus fact: he had excellent white teeth, perfectly manicured nails, and his hair and beard had been trimmed with scissors, giving us concrete evidence of hygiene practices and tools among the Celts.

To round off: it seems likely they did something, though whether it was painting or tattooing, we don’t really know. It was probably done with metal compounds, and certainly not with woad. Queen Lizzie One lost the indigo plantations to the Spanish anyway. Lindow Man’s life was fabulous if riddled with parasites, right up to the point it very abruptly wasn’t, somewhere in his 20s.

And the Celts made exquisite metal stuff.

The New Guy - Peter Parker Imagine

Originally posted by fuckyeahtonystark

Warnings: None but I might as well put this here: this is reader dad!Tony so if you don’t like those skip this.

Words: 1k

A/N: I’m going to use this opportunity as a shameless shout out to my fan account on Instagram as I’m so close to 1k and so want to get 1k before Homecoming because I will just be so happy. So follow me ‘hotdamnholland’ (I make Tom memes haha ;) )

“He’s my age?!” You exclaimed as your father, Tony Stark, told you for the first time that he’d got a new recruit for the team.

“Yes.”

“He’s a kid and you - a grown man - have basically come into his life and said 'Oh yeah I’ll make you a new super suit and yeah you might be able to be part of my group of people who fight aliens for a living’.” You folded your arms and looked right at him. You left a pause to let Tony think about it.

“Oh and 'Here’s my daughter, she’s your age therefore it should all be alright.’” You added.

“Your point?” Tony asked, his tone completely neutral.

“Change a few words and that could be made into a underage rape porn video.”

“Don’t make me ground you.”

You smirked but that quickly died. “I’m being serious. What do his parents think?”

“He doesn’t have any.” Tony stated.

This time you had no witty retort. “Who does he live with?”

“His Aunt. She’s nice.”

“And so she’s fine with this?”

“Technically, she doesn’t know this.” Tony said referring to the whole Avenging business.

“Let me guess, internship?”

“Exactly.” Tony gave you the classic smirk that someone seemed to show the end to the conversation. You had no intention of stopping yet.

“Okay fine. Is he an Avenger then?”

“Not exactly.”

You frowned. “Wait so it is an internship?”

“No - it’s more of a slight addition, but not real Avenging.”

“You’re waving it in front of his face like an out of reach carrot.”

“I am not!”

“Is he an Avenger?”

“Not yet.”

“Will he ever be?”

“Depends.” Tony said. He said it as if this kid had to prove his worth.

“When will I meet him?” You were curious now. He had to be special or your Dad wouldn’t take an interest in him. And your age? So he was high school age, and probably going to school unlike you. You wondered how time worked out for him then. Unfortunately, the world ending doesn’t wait for you to finish your Maths homework. So no high school for you.

“In a few minutes hopefully.”

“You’re kidding?” So you got this bombshell, and you would be meeting said 'bombshell’ a few minutes after knowing about it.

“Nope, he’s coming to the Tower.” Tony seemed very calm and chilled. “I’ve upgraded his suit and I want you to be there.”

“What when he’s putting it on?”

“No, testing Y/N.”

“Right…” You agreed.

Tony got a ping on his phone. Well it wasn’t really a phone. It was something of his own invention and unfairly he would not make one for you.

“Looks like Happy’s got him.” He said and gestured for you to follow him to elevator.

“Happy’s taking him to the labs?” You asked as you trailed along behind.

“Yes.” Tony said as you got into the elevator. “Now, Y/N, play nice. Don’t scare him off and he’s off limits.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

“I’m just saying it now…” Tony muttered as the elevator came to the right level and the doors opened.

Tony stepped out and you saw Happy waiting with a kid that did look your age.

“Parker meet my daughter Y/N.” Tony said. “Y/N this is Peter Parker.”

“Hey.” You said and he gave you a nervous smile.

“Peter I’ve got your suit this way.” Tony started off through the lab door.

Peter followed without having to be told twice and you just followed him.

“Y/N wait here.” Tony ordered and you did as he took Peter further into the lab supposedly to get him to put the suit on.

You perched on a chair and waited. Honestly, you were interested in seeing what this kid could do, and also sort of thrilled that their was another super kid your age. You were feeling a bit out numbered being a kid. And he was cute… that was a bonus.

About 10 minutes later Tony paraded Peter out to you in a red and blue suit that even from the outside looked really high tech.

“I present Spiderman.” Tony said in his usually charismatic tone. “Well Y/N what do you think?”

“Well it leaves nothing to the imagination.” You stated. You imagined Peter going a darker shade of red than the suit under the mask.

“Apart from that.” Tony warned shooting you a 'behave nicely’ look.

“I think it looks cool.” You said sincerely. You walked wrong Peter trying to not look like you were 'checking him out’ but that was literally your job here.

“Right well he needs to move in it so I need you two to spar for me.” Tony said completely nonchalantly.

“Here right now?” You said well aware that you were in a lab with various dangerous chemicals.

“Yeah just go over there and throw a few punches at each other.” Tony said pointing to the only bit of the lab that didn’t have a bench. You had about 5 meters in radius before you would have knocked over something you wished you hadn’t.

Tony pointed again as if he hadn’t got all day and you and Peter did what you were told.

“Y-You want me to fight her?” Peter said as if that was the last thing he wanted to do.

“Yes but don’t actually hurt each other,” Tony answered, “but Y/N get him to move. I need to see how flexible this thing is on someone.”

“I can do that…” You muttered before feigning a right jab to Peter’s head so he moved to the left and blocked it with the back of his arm. This kid was quick.

You brought you right arm up like Peter had done to block your face as you brought your right hand down to punch him in the chest.

It was just like a training fight.

You both continued like this for a minute getting each other to dodge and block and occasionally actually hitting each other.

“Okay.” Tony said indicating for you two to stop. “Peter how does it feel?”

“Good. Thanks Mr Stark.”

“Mr Stark?!” You scoffed trying not to laugh but then stopped when Tony gave you a look again.

Tony walked round Peter once more.

“So Y/N what do you think?” Tony asked again.

“Hmm… He can stay.” You said with a smirk.

Masterlist

Team Voltron themed drinks!

In light of season 3 releasing soon and planning a viewing party with some of my friends, I recently started thinking about making themed drinks after certain characters and what-not (seeing as I’m the designated bartender of my friend group lol). There’s obviously TONS of different drinks you can make to fit a character, but I took a bit of liberty to fantasize what drinks I’d love to make (had I the time and money); these aren’t arbitrary choices either. I primarily chose drinks that I thought reflected certain character aspects, so I’ve included a small analysis along with each drink choice.

note: for practical reasons (like if ppl actually wanted to make themed drinks) I’ve included both a simplified mixed drink alternative (which, let’s be real, that’s what I’m actually making) AND a non-alcoholic alternative (which are super basic im sorry but it’s the best i could do)

Let’s get mixing!


Shiro – “Boulevardier”

This is one of the few drinks I chose based more on personality than appearance. Most purple cocktails just didn’t quite ring true for Shiro’s full-bodied character, so I went with my gut feeling and started browsing some bourbon based drinks. After going through a few classic recipes, I settled on a Boulevardier. What it contains:

  • 1.5 oz Bourbon
  • ¾ oz Sweet vermouth
  • ¾ oz Campari
  • Orange or cherry as a garnish
  • Served over ice optional

Shiro, as a character, radiates a sense of maturity and warmth. He is kind and caring, but knows when to take charge of his team and push harder. The subtle sweet undertones in bourbon and the warmth of dark liquor, I feel, reflect these aspects of his character very well. Sweet vermouth, like bourbon, has those husky, herbal undertones; it’s basically a wine spiked with brandy and slightly sweetened. Campari is a liqueur made from infused herbs and fruit, a sweet and spicy flavor. This is, in essence, a darker drink, and one that is probably an acquired taste; aka, this is not a beginner or casual drink. It’s a drink I think is well suited to our beloved enigmatic leader, the Head of Voltron, pilot of the Black Lion. It has warmth and depth, a complexity of flavors that matches Shiro’s nuances in character.

Practical party alternative: any type of whiskey and coke (though I still recommend bourbon, it tastes better imo); you can also do a spiced rum and coke if you’re not a whiskey person.

Non-alcoholic alternative: honestly? cherry coke or like…diet coke with lime strike me as very Shiro for some reason lol.

Keep reading

10 Things They Don’t Tell You about Finding Your First Teaching Position

Congratulations on graduating you teacher/educator! Wrapping up your student teaching and walking across that stage is a validation of four long years of work. Now all that’s left is to find your first teaching job.

1.) You will not have a job in May. Breathe.

Especially if you’re not math, science, or SPED expect not to have a job in May. This can be an incredibly scary and daunting position to be headed towards, but it is also completely normal. Schools do not even start thinking about the next school year until late June/early July. This isn’t to say you shouldn’t even start your search until then, but don’t panic until August 1st. Perhaps you’re a self-driven “go-getter” who just knows in your heart you’re going to be one of the few with a job. That’s great, be determined, but know that the system you’re headed towards does not really reward go-getters, and often you’ll feel like you’re constantly speeding up to a red light. The people who are graduating with a job are either: student teaching at a school that has an opening, their CT is head of the department, or they return to the high school they themselves attended. There is nothing wrong with using connections, but if you’re not in the one of the above three categories, it is a tough process to get your foot in the door. Thousands of teachers just like you go through this process every year. Breathe, and you will be fine.

2.) There will be peaks and valleys

There will be days that you are nailing it; there will be days where you are wallowing in self-pity on the carpet blubbering about how you’re un-hirable (and maybe un-lovable) and should crawl under a rock and die. As with any job search, the journey is a long one and is filled with peaks and valleys. This is something that your education prep courses notoriously under-prepared you for. To start with, they do not give you a real scope of just how much time the search itself is going to take you and the courses, (no matter how many resume building classes you attend) can’t prepare you for how personal it feels when you never get a call back, or a reply email. The valleys are so long and so deep and the peaks are so short that you may accidentally trip over one on the way to another valley. You present the best version of yourself for so long and seem to still face rejection at every corner. There will be days where you get that email or a principal will leave a voicemail and you will feel as if you have vanquished a monster every time. Those are glorious times in the kingdom. Know this: it is not personal, there is nothing wrong with you, keep up the good fight.

3.) Take Sundays for you

Obviously being determined is important and you want to start early and have your application materials (resume, letters of rec…etc) as soon as you can get them together. However, nothing ever gets accomplished on a Sunday. It’s rare for any principals to be in their office, district offices certainly aren’t open, and everything shuts down on a Sunday. In the mad, stressful search that is finding your first teaching position, take Sundays for you. Go to the movies, hang out with friends, go swimming. Whatever the case may be you will never get anything accomplished on a Sunday, so you might as well take the day to unwind and enjoy what little of a summer you have. A lot of your search is going to be about balance and not stressing yourself out into a panic. Taking one day a week is a very manageable way to organize your time and make sure you’re not going to get burned out too early.

4.) Everyone’s a critic

Teaching is a unique profession in the sense that everyone around you, teachers or not, will think they know how to do it and will give you advice on your job search. Random people will ask “well, did you call any principals yet?” and you’re supposed to act shocked at this revelation that is going to single-handedly turn your career around. Your friends and family will mean well, which it makes it very difficult to get upset with them when they turn to you in May wondering why you haven’t found work. You have done your research; you know when districts start hiring or when they have career fairs…etc, just hold your head up high. It’s difficult when you feel you’re doing every little thing you can to find a job and your family and friends are breathing down your neck and offering patronizing advice like “make sure you have extra copies of your resume.” Extra copies? WHAT? Slow down, let me get a pen, I want to get all of this written down! The best advice is to smile and nod and don’t let their ignorance of our profession get under your skin.

 5.) Learn to love the hoops

Contrary to what movies (and your family) will tell you, teaching is not a one “30-minute-interview-handshake” sort of thing anymore (see #2). A very plausible scenario: you to attend a career fair and give a 5-minute meet and greet, to which they will schedule another follow-up interview (usually lasting about 30-40 minutes) after that interview you would make it to the second round, which is a 20 minute teaching demonstration lesson, followed by an hour-long debrief on your lesson’s strengths and weaknesses. Finally they’d narrow it down to two candidates, and you would have to interview an additional time for the position, then wait a week and a half while the principal/admin team makes their decision for which you have a 50/50 shot at. That is roughly 4-5 hoops to jump through. Urban districts, rural districts, and every district in between have a lengthy screening process that, (unless you’re in one of the three categories mentioned in #1) will take some time to complete. There is no way around this process, and the only way to win the game is to play it. You will have to love the process, because if you don’t life will become a meaningless abyss and you’ll end up like one of those teaching majors who take some desk job somewhere and convince themselves they’re happier not being in a classroom. Stick with it! It is what everyone else is doing and you will make it out alive.

6.) There aren’t always right answers

So congrats, you landed the interview! That is a feat in and of itself because principals and assistant principals have to sort through so many different resumes and qualified applications that making the cut that first time is a success. When looking for your first teaching job out of college, it is hard to get out of that “right/wrong, black/white, yes/no” mentality. In your education classes there were right or wrong answers. However, in interviews with principals (especially the earlier ones) they are just looking for how you think or how you shape your ideas/philosophy over time. Answer the questions as succinctly and honestly as you can. Sometimes they may ask a question you know nothing about, such as a specific theory or score-reporting software. In these cases, just admit you’re unfamiliar with whatever concept they are asking you about, but are willing to do some independent research. Hundreds of applicants will be b.s.-ing answers all day to their faces, and most principals will thank you for your honesty. Get out of that “right/wrong” dichotomy because it’s going to put a lot more stress on you when speaking with the principal. There is, of course, the possibility that whomever is interviewing you will hate all your answers, and that’s fine (see #7) that just means it’s somewhere you don’t want to be, or wouldn’t “gel” well with the rest of the staff.

7.) Go to every interview

This sounds like common sense, and the angry skeptic might read this point as “oh yeah, let me turn down all the NOTHING I’m getting offered.” Hold tight. After working your way through May and June and maybe even early July you will finally start to get some traction. Schools will start calling you back slowly, but surely. Think of it as the first snowflake of an avalanche, or the first drop in a rainstorm, or whatever various “more will come” metaphor you’d prefer. You start to hack your way through the jungle of hoops and a few schools tell you you’re being “highly considered” or “you’re the favorite candidate for this position.” That is great news! However, be wary of ever assuming you’ve got a job in the bag. There may be a point where you’re so sure one school wants to hire you, and then you’ll get another call. Go to that interview. Until your signature is ink on paper, keep jumping through the hoops. Sometimes the best school will contact you later in the year and might be the best thing for you. The universe is a random and chaotic thing, so keep as many options open as possible and be careful about shutting doors too quickly.  

8.) Don’t kid yourself on where you want to be

In line with #6, be honest about what kind of environment, and what kind of student body you want to teach. Some of your peers will opt for the more rural areas where you have to drive 30 minutes to get to a Wal-Mart; the class sizes are smaller and the kids have a lot of parental involvement. However, some of your peers will opt for more urban areas, some of your peers will opt for a suburb area or a private school; they all have pros and cons. At any rate, make sure you know what kind of area you want to be in, and make those a top priority in your search for a job. Spending a year in an environment you hate will drive you nuts and, frankly, it will rub off on your students and will be a bad situation all around. When you feel like you’re drowning, you might be quick to accept “any port in a storm,” and this is entirely natural. However, fight this urge. Your students will sense it, your administration will sense it, and that’s bad news. You may be waiting a bit longer, and other jobs might pass you up in the meantime, but it is better to wait for a position you could really see yourself in rather than taking the first offer that comes along.

 9.) Your resume will never matter as much as your personality

Over the years you may have added many fellow education majors to Facebook (through classes, for projects, whatever.) You will have seen these peers teach in classes, and through four years you’ll have a rough idea of how these men and women are in a classroom. These peers will forget to turn on projectors, refuse to accept any criticisms of their lesson plans, or speak so softly they couldn’t command an army of ants let alone a classroom. Every other day you will see someone post a status announcing their new position of gainful employment. Some of these people you will remark “oh, good for them!” and for others your jaw will drop in disbelief that some district out there in the world gave that person a job. It’s rude, it’s petty, but you will think it. Bottom line: be prepared to see bad teachers get jobs before you. That’s because they met with a principal who, more than likely, just felt like that applicant would be a “good fit” for their building. Often they are correct. Your resume is incredibly important to getting your foot in the door, but at the end of the day that personality has to shine through because that is what’s going to clinch you the job.

10.) We are all on the same ship

There are some who believe that finding your first teaching job is a zero-sum game. (Your loss is their win.) These people will commonly say things like “I’m not sharing any of my resources!” or “Why would I tell people about openings I know about? Then someone else could get them!” Do not, under any circumstances, choose to be one of those people. Teaching is a profession built on collaboration and the people who respond to the stress of searching for a job by lashing out and treating everyone like the enemy make this process practically unbearable. Sometimes a friend will get a call from an urban school, and she’ll pass your name along to them instead because she’d prefer something more rural. Sometimes it is just that easy. We, as educators, have enough to deal with trying to find that first job without worrying about our peers stabbing us in the back.  We are all passengers on the same ship just trying to get into classrooms to inspire and foster students. Rest assured you will get into a classroom, and all the effort will be worth it. Once you finally secure that job, do you really want to turn around and see that no one’s behind you because you were more interested in stepping on necks than helping people out?

One day your grandkids will ask “what was the best day of your life?” and having kids and grandkids and winning the lottery and solving the world’s problems will pale in comparison to the day a principal calls you to offer you the position. That moment is coming; be prepared and try to relax.

7.27.17 // 1:30pm // beginner’s adobe illustrator pt 1

hey friends! as you might have noticed, i’ve gotten really into adobe illustrator (ai) recently and i wanted to share some of my newfound knowledge with you. i literally had no exposure to anything like photoshop or ai until about 3 weeks ago so here’s a guide for beginners written by a beginner! (this is also partially a compilation of things i wish i knew when i started) xoxo, m

ok this is super long so if you’re interested, the tips are under the cut!

Keep reading

(A table of contents is available. This series will remain open for additional posts and the table of contents up-to-date as new posts are added.)

Part Seven: Writing Siblings

Luckily for me, and all the stories I want to see, siblings tend to appear in stories quite a bit more than parents, but still not as often as a group of friends or acquaintances that come together to work as a team. Siblings are another tether to your character’s family–to their past and their roots, to all the secrets in their past you may have built into plot devices for later. They’re cut from the story as easy pressure points for evoking emotion; in a similar way to how significant others and date-mates may be killed off to serve the story, siblings often find themselves in a similar fate. Siblings are a fantastic resource for stories and provide an opportunity for intense relationships to your character if you bother to let them stay in the narrative.

Shared history: 

This is one of my favorite things about sibling characters: They share a special history. If they grew up together, they have many of the same experiences: holiday traditions and family trips, opinions about a family member and all the remember-when moments. They know the tics of their parents, know what happened when a certain button got pushed one too many times. They know what each other went through, and they know each others strengths and weaknesses; they know how to support each other with that shared history. Friends can come to develop that over time, but siblings come with it inherently if they were lucky enough to grow up together.

If a character didn’t grow up with their siblings, there’s a beautiful opportunity when/if they do meet to begin building that shared history they missed out on. You get to watch as two people not only come to be friends, but also realize that their friendship could become something deeper if they wanted it to: a true family relationship. If both characters accept the family tie and are interested in pursuing a connection between them, there’s so much story depth that can be added through scenes watching them go from laughing at the same joke to realizing that losing the other would tear them apart.

Shared history also extends to family background, too, so if your main character discovers something about their lineage, their sibling is also affected. This is an important thing to remember since you can spin more complex tales using it–all of a sudden, it’s not just your character dealing with the discovery, it’s also the sibling, and it’s not just how your character’s relationship to their family changes, but also how their relationship with their sibling changes, too. Your plot devices like prophecies and chosen heroes and go-it-alone-only-you-can quests and no-one-understands-the-struggle dilemmas all of a sudden get a lot more interesting, much more faceted, and provide lots of nooks and crannies of emotion and character development to explore.

Relationship with their sibling: 

We know that siblings share a connection deeper than just friendship–they’re family. Portraying that part of their relationship to your character is vital to making them feel right and real. There are a couple of things you can use to help get that across.

Using that shared history is going to help no matter what. Your siblings are going to be able to reach each other easier because they can bring up things they both experienced and relate those emotions back to what they’re going through currently. They’re more likely to be able to coach each other through situations and more likely to have things to say or remember that are poignant, relevant, or impactful in some way for your character. Because of this, an added side effect is that emotional reactions that are instinctual when it comes to other people may not be the same toward a sibling. For example, an acquaintance may say something that sends your character into a rage, however if a sibling had said something similar, it might have been funny instead. Our relationships with others slowly change our emotional reactions the more familiar and comfortable we become.

Take into consideration personality, as well. Do these siblings get along with each other? What contributed to that? My family moved a lot, so my sister and I wound up very close because we were our only constants in our lives; we knew we’d both be there to face new places, and we lived in cars and hotels together for weeks at a time, so we had to get along or we’d kill each other. It helped that we liked a lot of the same things, some of which were shared by our parents as well. Remember that while you want to have well-rounded characters that are capable of standing on their own as full individuals, it doesn’t mean that your siblings have to embody completely separate, opposite personalities in order to be effective characters. Maybe they’re both quiet and smart, which allows them to ping ideas off each other and solve super complex problems; maybe they’re both defensive and it causes them to butt heads because of it. Don’t lock yourself into the idea that they need to be juxtaposed against each other to create interesting dynamics between them.

Narrative Impact: 

Your siblings will provide an opportunity to portray a relationship full of familial love–just as deep as romantic love, but without any pressure from readers for it to get sexual. (And if you were planning that really common foster sibling or separated sibling love relationship, please don’t. It’s very awkward for literally everyone involved and there are 1,000 more conflict and emotional growth opportunities out there than that. Ugh.) That positive portrayal will go a long way toward not only reestablishing siblings in literature but also showing real-world siblings a reflection of themselves.

Think about your plot and whether their sibling status has any kind of impact toward the plot or whether it’s simply a minor detail. How will your siblings’ connection change how they react to certain situations by shading their goals? What are those goals for each sibling and are there ways they connect and interact? There should be some that each sibling doesn’t share–goals that are specific to each individual as a person, not solely joint goals as a functioning unit together. After all, these are not one person, but two people who care about each other. How can those goals feed into your plot or into the character development of either and serve to escalate or resolve other conflicts?

Do they like to stay in communication with each other? Is their communication mostly long-distance, or face-to-face? How often do they see each other? What are a couple of key memories and the emotional reactions that go with them? How do their personalities interact and how can you take advantage of that with the plot? Would manipulation of one bring out the best or worst in the other? What would happen to your character’s mental state if one of their siblings was to be put in danger or injured? How protective are they of each other, and how much would one sacrifice for the other? How well do they handle being apart, and how much do they respect each other’s space when it’s self-initiated vs. circumstance-initiated?

Next up: Immediate extended family!

Imagine you and your wife want a baby...

Note: This is a lesbian semi rapid pregnancy fluff story. I love rapid pregnancy stories but I only like fluffy, sweet stories where the growth is noticeable, but not violent or taking place over the span of a few seconds. I also like set up and some sweet character interactions. This is my first short story like this so I hope everyone enjoys, but please leave criticism if you feel like it is needed.

—–

You and your wife Sarah are dropped off by the taxi, and you unload your bags. The sunrise has just started, the sky is a light purple that the orange is just starting to fade in. The salty beach air rushes by you; it has been 7 years since your honeymoon you went to the beach. You’re here over the 4 day weekend at The Agency for Parenthood. You saw advertised that over the span of 4 days all the proper arrangements can be made to where you can go home with a healthy baby. Over the phone there wasn’t information given, just the travel arrangements were made. You and your wife had always wanted to raise a family, but it is harder to do so naturally being a lesbian couple. But in only 4 days? Maybe it’s an adoption agency where you meet with the expectant mother and get matched over the weekend. They figured they would go along, it was a beach resort and if they didn’t like it they could get a hotel and just have a relaxing weekend together away from the bustling city. You see other couples getting their stuff together to go inside.

An employee rushes over and helps to gather your belongings. Your items are taken to the suite where you will be staying in, you have been instructed to go to the auditorium to await further instructions. The facility is top notch, 5 stars. The building was alabaster white, marble floors, and wide windows facing the glistening, emerald green ocean and sandy shores. Immediately upon entering you smell savory food, assuming an open buffet must be nearby. This place looks fantastic! You do see several pregnant women waddling around in various stages of pregnancy. Some are in their swimsuits, their swollen, glowing bodies are barely contained by the fabric, leaving through the glass large doors to enjoy the beach. You whisper to Sarah how exciting it will be to get to know these ladies and hopefully be matched. You brought a scrapbook with photos of their life at home just in case they needed to present themselves.

You both find your seats in the auditorium, there is about 50 or so seats. Other couples find their way in and after an hour the room is filled with small chatter. The doors close, the lights dim, and just the small stage has light. After a few moments a middle aged woman, walks into the stage, wearing a large white lab coat over her black pants suit.

“Good morning everyone! I am Dr. Abagail Harris, founder of The Agency of Parenthood. I hope you find our accommodations acceptable during your stay here.” She continues to go over some basic rules of the facility, like where certain locations are on the campus, services provided, and emergency protocol. The audience grows restless.

“Now, the question you all have: how does all over this work? You all have one thing in common, you all want to start a family.” You and the audience start to quiet down to listen carefully.

“You might think upon seeing our other clients here that this is an adoption agency. That is not the case, your children will be biologically yours. The medical technology I have here is highly coveted by certain unscrupulous groups, so please understand the secrecy up to this point.” While there was background chatter during the other parts of the presentation, the audience is now deathly quiet, awaiting to hear what will happen.

Dr. Harris pauses for dramatic effect, smiling wide. “I know we have several same sex couples here, and the child will be biological from both of you as well” Sarah squeezes your hand, you look over and she has a grin as big as the moment you proposed to her all those years ago. You squeeze back, feeling the engagement ring on her finger you gave her and continue to listen.

“This is a type of fertility treatment we have here. But we know a lot of you are busy business men and women. You have planes to catch, meetings to secure multi million dollar deals across the globe next week. Do not fear, your busy lives will not be on hold the next 9 months. You can leave with a biological child of your own in 4 days. I have pioneered technology to expedite the pregnancy, to better accommodate the lifestyle of the 21st century family.” You and the audience gasps in awe at the news.

Dr. Harris starts to giggle a little bit. “Don’t worry, it is completely safe. You saw our other clients as you entered, they are enjoying the sugar sand beaches, splashing in the cool ocean. We have only the best doctors medical staff the world has to offer. If there was a medical emergency, which hasn’t happened in the 10 years we have been open…” She knocks on a wooden support beam for the stage for comedic effect “…we do have a full operatory room that our staff is trained to handle any emergency. In fact, our first patient is yours truely.” Behind her on the projection screen is a collage of photos, a younger Dr. Harris in various stages of pregnancy, then a group photo of her family that includes 6 children. “I did not open this facility until I had proof of the technology. I found out I was infertile when I first got married and I feared I could never have a family. My lifes work has been bringing children into the world that otherwise could not be here. No medical condition can hold you back from having a family.”

The audience is now beyond excited, you can hear all the couples whispering to each other, smiles across the audience. You give Sarah a peck on the cheek. You feel her cheek wet from tears of joy. You wrap your arm around her shoulders, holding her firm.

“My staff will answer more specific questions you may have during the medical exam, which is where you will be going next. It’s going to be a busy next few days, so no time to waste!“ She waved to the audience and the back doors opened on cue.

During her presentation the white lab coat seemed to unbutton. As she was walking off stage, the jacket swept to her sides and behind her. You notice the pale skin of her round stomach peek out from under her black blouse, obviously not meant as a maternity shirt. She hurriedly tucked it back down a few moments later when she realized it. You giggle to yourself, it seems that Dr. Harris isn’t even done adding to her family. You hold Sarah hand as you make your way out.

As everyone leaves the auditorium, there are medical staff with signs each having a different surname on them. You find your family name and are greeted by Mary, your personal nurse and guide over the weekend. She is young, no older than 25. She is just about your height, 5'1”. Her black, long hair and dark skin contrasts with the white lab coat she is wearing. She walks the both of you into a small medical room down a branching hallway and begins to go over each of your health history.

As she concludes the basic medical exam, Mary starts going over the fertility treatment: DNA will be collected from the couple and a zygote will be created using the medical technology at hand. She continues “…and as both of you are women, you have an unique situation. If you want, you can have twins that each of you carry.” You look at Sarahs big brown eyes in excitement. You both have always wanted to have the experience of pregnancy. “The advantage of this is that you can carry one of the twins without the additional bodily stresses that having multiples cause.” That also sounded good.

You have a twin brother and you did always hope to replicate the experience of being a twin with your own child. After some discussion, you both decide that this might be the only time you will be able to do this and agree to each carry a child.

“And like Dr. Harris said, this is completely safe.” Mary pulls out her cell phone and shows you photos of her heavily pregnant, the photo dated just last weekend! The next photo she shows is of her 3 beautiful children, one of them a little girl only a few days old. “Each and every medical staff member is required to have completed the treatment as well, so we can best answer your questions. And yes, my lovely little Emily there was brought into the world last week!” You would of never guessed that she would recover physically so quickly. But then again Dr. Harris is working on child number 7, the process must be easy.

Mary continues “Each of the 40 weeks of pregnancy have been reduced to 40 hours. Within 2 days the fertilized egg will form into a fully formed baby. The 3rd day must stay at the last stage of pregnancy, this stage helps decelerate the fetal growth so they don’t continue to grow rapidly after they are born. The final day here after birth is preparing for the journey home and making vital purchases for the new family member. We will provide  what you will need for the first month. Tomorrow morning you will have an ultrasound to determine the gender of the children, then you will meet with our nursery specialists to have a fully stocked nursery installed in your home while you are here…well…” Mary pats at her currently slim stomach. “…becoming fully stocked yourself.” You all giggle at the joke, but it is also a little nervous sounding as the two of you are slowly taking in the reality of the situation.

There are two medical exam tables in this room. Mary instructs you both to get on one after you disrobe. She leaves the room gather equipment. You both start to take off your clothes and place them in the basket provided. You take an extra long glance at Sarah, she is just as beautiful as the day you met 10 years ago. She is about 4 inches taller than you and is dark as midnight. People tease that the two of you are like night and day since you look polar opposites. The bright lights from the lamps reflect off her skin like shooting stars across the night sky. Sarah has always been a little self conscious of carrying an extra 20 pounds than what she would like, but you find her curves soft and lovely. You have been jealous, yourself always small and petite, always struggling to keep weight on. You try to imagine her with child; her chubby belly that you love to play with, instead full and tight, her belly button popped out from the growing child. Her breasts swelling past their modest handful, you imagine them spilling out the sides of your hands as you gently tease her enlarged, even darker nipples. You then realize that you too would be full figured in every way soon, no longer small and frail. Your heart races, you cannot control your imagination. Firm, swollen round bellys rubbing against each other as you try to hug each other. The only thing that snaps you out of it is the knock on the door. Mary is announcing her return to start the process. You look at Sarah and she seems flustered too, blushing.

“It seems we were having simular thoughts…” She walks over to you and gives you a gentle kiss as she helps you finish undressing, slipping the loose jeggings and tank top off. She slowly rubs your bare stomach, then kisses you on the cheek. Sarah and you hop on the tables and cover yourself with the thin paper blankets provides. Sarah shouts that you both are ready for her to enter.

Mary wheels in various equipment and about 3 other medical staff follow behind. Mary is starting up the equipment as she proceeds to discuss the next steps. “For this part of proceedure you must be placed under general anesthesia for the next 6 hours, the DNA samples can be uncomfortable to gather. Once we place the fertilized eggs in your womb, any movement can disrupt impregnation since this is such a delicate process. You will awaken when we confirm that impregnation was successful. At that point you can proceed to enjoy the next 3 days at your leasure.” You see various other medical equipment being wheeled all around you, the staff placing the sensors on you and Sarah. You feel the pinches of multiple needles being placed in your arms, attached to multiple IV bags. Your heart is now racing from being nervous. This is happening. You see Sarah hand reach out to hold yours, also connected to IV bags. You grasp her hand firmly, feeling with her engagement ring again.  Mary starts counting backwards as you both go under.

“I love you Sarah.” You say shakily. You look into her eyes, wet from tears of excitement. Her full lips start to open to respond but the darkness of sleep pulls you under before you can hear her response.

—–6:34 PM——

You awaken slowly, blinking in and out on consciousness for what seems forever. The bright lights are like staring into the sun, you rub your eyes as you come to. You gain enough awareness to look around for Sarah. She is putting on her sundress, appearing to have awoken much sooner than you. You see that the IV needles are gone, replaced with band aids. You notice a watch on your left wrist. It says 4:41, but that can’t be right if you were under for 6 hours…

Mary speaks from behind you. “Good evening! Everything was a stunning success!” You struggle to sit up, but manage to do so with help from Mary. You look down at your belly, still flat. You then realize the paper blanket has been removed and you curl up, embarrassed from being stark naked.

“Oh, don’t worry about that, we see naked women all the time. But I understand how you feel.” She reaches for the clothes basket and hands you the floral tank top and denim jeggings you wore in. She turns around to let you clothe yourself. She continues to explain while turned around.

“You both have been pregnant for 4 hours at this point. So this is just like the fourth week of pregnancy. You each have a watch, timed to the exact moment when the pregnancy started.” You look at the watch just after slipping on your tank top and just as she said, it says 4:42. Makes sense now. The tank top has a built in bra shelf that for your small, just barely there breasts fit into. Honestly if anything it’s still too big and the shirt is an extra small already. “This will count up to 40 hours, when gestation will suspend for a whole day to stop the accellerated growth. Wouldn’t want your bouncing babies to grow up too fast, they already do at a natural pace!”

You finish zipping up your jeans, which you do notice are a tiny little tighter than usual. Before if anything stuck out it was your hip bones. Now the hip bones are hidden away like you have always wanted them to be. You do finally realize that you are absolutely famished! You hear Sarah stomach growl from the other side of the room. Laughing, you walk over and reach for your wife’s hand. You both are grinning from ear to ear.

“Now, you will be growing at an unnatural pace, so I would recommend heading up to your rooms and slipping into something more..accommodating. The buffet is open 24/7, so feel free to eat up! The typical week that you start to show is around 12, so around 2 in the morning is when you’ll actually start filling out in the middle. You’ll be a whole different person when you wake up tomorrow morning!”

Mary opens the door and gives you your room  key, room 245. She gives you directions on how to get there, the resort being so huge. Hand in hand, you both walk out and enter the main lobby area where people are heading for dinner. It smells so wonderful, your mouth starts to fill with saliva.

“Since our room is at the other end of the resort, let’s go ahead and grab some chow!” Sarah pats her soft tummy “Afterall, we are eating for 4 now.”

You enter the dining room and immediately taken back at the sheer amount of food. A huge buffet line with every kind of food you can think of, staff restocking the popular items. You see all around couples having dinner. The women early in their pregnancy are all along the buffet line getting their food, while you see all the women very full with child sitting down at the tables, their husbands and  not pregnant spouses getting them probably their third plate of food. You look over at each others bodies and realize this will be us in just a day! You both make your way to the buffet line and fill up your plates.

You find a table with a couple you sat next to during the presentation. They wave you down and you both take a seat. As you are seated, your jeans dig into your sides and stomach. You do your best to adjust them to make yourself comfortable.

You spend hours talking and eating with the couple. Their names are Justin and Darlene, a husband and wife CEO team for a business software company. Over the years they could never concieve a child naturally, but 2 years ago they had their first child thanks to The Agency for Parenthood. They hired a babysitter for their son and they hope for a daughter to complete their family. Sarah, being the more social one, fills them in on your story. You add in important details as needed, but between the bites you gaze on Sarah and are reminded of why beyond her beauty you fell in love with her; her ability to start a conversation with anyone is how she met you. You wish you had the gift of the gab like her, but you also just love the melody of her voice as she spins tales of their adventurous early years of your marriage.

The hours passes by, eating plate and plate of delicious food: mac and cheese, glazed ham, steak, biscuts, nearly everything at least once! You wish you thought ahead like Sarah and worn a dress, your pants are just aching to be off at this point, you feel the b pants digging in. You try to adjust them and now there is a quite noticeable, but small still, fat spilling out all around the belt of jeggings. You reach your hand feel your skin over your belt line, its soft, just fat; not the firm, small round belly you hope to be sporting when you wake up tomorrow morning. But this is the most you ever filled out any item of clothing. You guess you might actually fit a size 1 currently instead of the 00 you typical have to wear. After laughs and sharing stories, photos on your phone of your pets and family, it is nearly 9pm and you both figure it is time to get ready for bed. You both ate so much food, your body is busy digesting it and is begging for sleep. You all give hugs and look forward to seeing them on campus tomorrow, excited to share upcoming baby bumps!

You leave the dining hall and make it to your room. It’s a solid 10 minute walk, you paid extra for a suite that overlooks the ocean, but with that comes extra walking to get such a remote room. You hold your wife’s hand and head down the hallways. You pass by some night owl couples who prefer moonlight to sunlight and making their way out now. You see one couple, both of them probably 30 hours into their pregnancies, heading out to the beach, hand on the smalls of their back for support, for what little of a moonlight beach waddle they can do. Their swimsuits can barely contain their newly formed bodies, breasts overflowing the bikini tops, the bottoms barely covering the nessary parts, being stretched as their hips obviously has widened signifigantly to house their evergrowing children. Their sway backwards to accomodate the new center of gravity matches the palm trees against the ocean wind, bending back as well. Their free hand is rubbing each other’s swollen tummys. Even though it is night, those women are glowing like the sun. You smile and make a mental note to take Sarah out on a night walk while here.

You do notice as you walk that there is a little bit more of jiggle to your breasts as you take your steps. Your breasts before were barely a size A cup, not even enough to jiggle even if you jumped. The built in bra for your top is struggling to support your breasts, now easily large enough where they have their own independent movement. You have never experienced this before and now understand why large breasted women are always complaining about bras with no support. As you walk, the skin of your swollen breasts tug down slightly with each step, causing some discomfort. Not as uncomfortable as the jeans though, they have to get off the moment you enter the room! All the buttered crab legs and thick lobster bisque you ate is finding their place on your body quicker than you expected. Your free hand goes to your hips; you now have what they jokingly call a muffin top. As you walk your breasts jiggle with your new expanded waist.

Your room is finally found and you enter. Sarah barely closes the door behind her before you take off your top. You feel the bounce of your breasts as the bra frees them, you feel them move for a small moment before they settle. You start to unbutton your pants and work your fingers to the zipper, but immediately forces itself open before you could even begin. You let out a sigh of relief. You brushed against your belly while your hand was undoing the button. Is it just you or does your belly already feel a bit firmer, a little more rounded? Can’t be, you look a your watch and it’s only hour 7, way sooner than the typical week you start to show. Sarah walks over to help you undress, she rubs her fingers along the red imprints from where your jeans were digging in.

“Hmm, you always thought you were too skinny, now you know how I feel after pizza night! I always thought…you….are just perfect…but you might be a different kind of perfect like this…” She gently rubs the indention lines, using them to guide her fingers. She continues to explore your expanding hips and beyond, slightly pressing on your tummy to see if it feels different. It is a little firmer, gives more resistance when she presses. You both notice and exchange smiles. Sarah leans over, gives your belly button a kiss and helps to remove the rest of the pants. She leans over in a way that purposefully shows her cleavage. Her breasts slightly overfilled the top of her bra, she is obviously going though the same changes as you are. You feel warm, you cannot wait to get her to the bed. You start to unbutton her dress when you both are caught off guard by your jeans. This was the only pair of jeans you owned that you didn’t need a belt to keep them up, even with that the extra fabric in the legs previously swished when walking. Sarah is having to tug rather hard on your jeans to remove them. Your breasts and midsection were not the only thing that has grown, but your legs have additional weight on them too.

“I need you to get on the bed so I can help get these off of you, you have grown so much already!” You lay down, noticing your breasts flattening out and to the side a bit as they do when they are of a larger cup size. With Sarahs help you shimmy the jeggings off. You lean back on the bed with relief when they finally let loose of your legs. The uncomfortable pressure of the waist band digging into your sides must have prevented you from noticing how tight the legs were. You see on your pale legs more red indention marks from where the pant seems were pressing against your growing thighs, but as you rub the indention marks you also feel other lines…you see them almost purple and along your hips and inside of your thighs, the most growth so far. Stretch marks. You are 31 but you finally got them! Sarah proceeds to quickly unbutton her dress and tosses it and your pants next to the luggage the staff left by the door. She jumps on bed with you, you and your new bodies all bounce with the bed springs up and down. You both hug and kiss each other, rolling on the bed, skin touching skin. You don’t notice as much changes on Sarah other than her slightly larger breasts, but you know that will come. You caress her breast with one hand, the other placing the other nipple to your lips, kissing them softly. She sharply gasps and moans, the sudden sensitivity freezing her in pure pleasure. The new changes to each of your bodies has opened a new world for sexual exploration. At this point you both planned on circumnavigating the expanding globes that are your tummys and elsewhere, leaving no area of skin untouched.

The night is simply magical, even better than your honeymoon 7 years ago, if that was possible. The hours pass and you both eventually fall asleep, her spooning you, a hand absently on your new breast, sending shivers over your bidy when her fingertips brush against your enlarged nipple. You realize this is the first time it can actually be cupped a little bit by hand, something Sarah especially made her aware of tonight. You curl up, your favorite sleeping position, and you feel a definite bulge from your swelling tummy when you bring your thighs up close to your body, it being called the fetal position just being ironic in this case. You bring your hand to feel it, and now you have a definate pregnant belly, firm and warm as you rub it slowly. You see is the watch on your wrist, reading hour 10 of the pregnancy.

Your dreams are of your new family: 4 toddler aged children running around playing tag. In your dream you look over to Sarah on your porch swing, heavily pregnant, swollen breasts resting on top of her belly that has spread her legs so wide apart. She has a shirt on, but it barely covers her enlarged popped out belly button that stretches the shirt to its limit. She white skirt she is wearing is nearly hidden by her belly that extends to the middle of her dark thighs.  You are holding the small of your back, taking your time to lean back into the swing, as to not fall over due to your own even larger belly that when you finally seat almost extends to your knees, breasts bounce and then settle to the sides of your firm, almost oblong shaped stomach under a loose sundress. The dream ends with the two of you hopelessly squeezed together, each of your thighs pressing and taking up the empty space under arm rest of the swing. The two person swing didn’t take into account women carrying each a set of twins, making it 6 people. Sarah, you and your four children laughs as they struggle to help you both out of the swing. While dreaming you hold the small swell of your growing child with your hand.

As the sleeping hours pass, it taking up more and more of your hand. You wake up once in the middle of the night due to something pushing against the small of your back, tickling as it creeps up your spine. As you turn over to get more comfortable, sleep still in your eyes, the moonlight reflects off of Sarahs now noticable baby bump, her soft belly you love now taught, the softness that was once there now have been used for your child. You start to find a new comfortable position, but not before you notice Sarahs hand move to her tummy, rubbing it now in her sleep too. You end up sleeping on your back, enjoying the weight you feel between your hips as your belly takes on more of a dome shape against the moon light. You cup one hand under your enlarged bump, the other on Sarahs firm and very warm belly.

Yes Sir

Jackson Wang x Reader

Word Count: 5.135

Be Warned: Sexual Content

A/N. I never really found any Ceo!Wang fics that I liked so I wrote one:D

Sup. This moodboard was made by me. None of the pictures belong to me though so credit to the owners:)

It’s always the same old, same old. Piles of paperwork, boring meetings, and overtime. Overtime was never your favorite. Was it anyone’s? The office was quiet and the only sound was that of papers flipping on both your desk and about two others. It was supposed to be about time you got home with your wine and your pizza for the weekend but of course, people were depending on you. The only upside to this crappy night was the view. Your office had a clear view of CEO Jackson Wang’s office if he chose to keep his blinds open. When he didn’t it was your loss but when he did, you couldn’t be happier. You observed how intently he worked. His jaw clenching when he was deep in thought and letting go when he found a solution. He was often fidgeting with his sleek black pen when he wasn’t writing with it. His office seemed pretty spacious so he often stood up and would pace back and forth behind his desk, talking to himself it seems. It was a wonderful view indeed and you were grateful that although he had the same view of you, he never looked your way.

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(A table of contents is available. This series will remain open for additional posts and the table of contents up-to-date as new posts are added.)

Part Four: The Birth of Planets

Last time, we talked about how when a nebula–a cloud of gas and dust in space–gets moving, the center starts to burn, thus birthing a star. While all that’s happening, the nebula is swirling, and in a way similar to how the air currents of your house push dust and particles together to form dust bunnies, so too do bits and pieces within the nebula start to bump into each other, forming globs that get bigger as they travel around the central star. And of course, as they get bigger, these clumps begin to weigh more, drawing in other clumps around it, and eventually you get the beginnings of a planet.

Now, if you might recall, the star at the center of the nebula is burning and what’s it’s fuel? Gas! Usually hydrogen. This, in addition to the heat being let off by the star, results in the center portions of the dust cloud to mostly be bits of rock and dust–the star has accumulated most of the gas around itself, and burned off any of the ice particles. Further out in the disc, however, the gases and ice chunks remain.

So as planets begin to form, generally the pattern that emerges is that the closer to the star a planet is, the more rocky it is, and the further out it is, the more gas and/or ice it’s likely to have. Not only that, but following the logic that the star has accumulated quite a bit already, the planets forming closer to the star have less to scoop up–less gases, less ice, just… less. So the planets forming in the outer portion of the nebula are more likely to be larger (not necessarily more weight, remember. A cloud is quite large, and paperclip isn’t, but the paperclip has more weight than the cloud; it is more massive.).

The Habitable Zone:

Now, assuming your star can exist long enough to life to develop on its planets, and assuming that we actually have any understanding of what’s required for life to exist, your planet needs to be in the Habitable Zone. We currently work under the assumption that habitability of a planet requires liquid water to be available year round. Whether that’s a truth for all life in the universe is a different question that I can’t answer, but for now, that’s our definition of a habitable planet. This also assumes that we’re talking about planets on which life develops on its own, rather than planets where life can be brought and find ways to exist.

The distance from the star at which liquid water is available for the duration of the planet’s orbit depends on the life stage of the star. Remember that older stars, burning red, are starting to exhaust their fuel supply. They burn cooler, so in order for a planet to stay within a comfortable range of the star where it would be neither too hot nor too cold, a planet would need to be closer than if it were orbiting a young, hot, bright star. Take a look:

In this diagram, you can see what I’m talking about. Earth sits comfortably within the habitable zone for our yellow sun, but when our sun begins to die, the habitable zone will shift.Venus and Mercury may eventually come to land smack-dab in the middle of that zone. If the star remains stable in that temperature/age range for long enough (billions of years), then it’s possible that the planet in the adjusted habitable zone, now that it has better conditions, might be able to spark its own life–maybe. Of course, the planet that was in the habitable zone before, has already died a painful and freezing death.

One more illustration. This one shows the habitable zone as the green ring, with blue being too cold and red being too warm.

What Does All This Mean For a Writer?

It’s unlikely that creatures or life forms would be able to evolve into anything on planets outside the habitable zone. Those places too close to and too far from the star aren’t going to be harboring life. Make sure that you’re placing your planet at an appropriate distance for the type of star you have. If your star is red, your planet needs to be closer, with the star large on the horizon. If your star is blue, your planet needs to be further out with the star smaller on the horizon.

One more thing, which is mostly hypothetical. Throughout the lifetime of your star, the planets that had life on them could conceivably have been farther from the star, with life possible on planets closer to the star as the star continues to age and cool off. Who cares, though, right?

Well, if your race is space-faring, there’s a possibility that remnants of life could be in evidence on planets further from the sun. Of course, this depends entirely on what kind of core the planet has and what “life” and “remnants of life” your characters are looking for. There’s not likely to be the foundations of houses on gaseous stars, since life forms of a gaseous star would need to exist in a very different way than, say, humans. But places like Mars, that used to be in the habitable zone and are also rocky places? Who knows. I’m just saying maybe, and if there were books written with that, I wouldn’t throw it out a window.

Next up: More than one star!

Snowbound

Here it is. The big Dad Harold fic, and the sandbox in which I usually play in when H has a kid. Or, at least, I loosely borrow from it. This one is my favorite, although it was only the 3rd or 4th thing I ever wrote, and… he’s my favorite? I love him? Be gentle? Treat him well? Also: I hope he accepts my sincerest apologies. 

A word: each thing with this sandbox could be the endpoint. But each thing… will likely not be the endpoint. There’s a part two of the official two part installment, and then after that… well, you’ll see. Enjoy! x.

P.S. I’m not from London and I’ve never bene, but I think this is how snowstorms go in a lot of places with public transit, so….

This is the storm of the season. At least, that’s what the weatherman kept saying when you left home that afternoon. And, navigating the winding streets, you have to agree that this was the nastiest one you can remember in awhile. You have slipped three times from the exit of the tube to the front door of Harry’s building and your knuckles are white from clenching fists so tightly to steel your nerves. You stomp your boots inside the lobby and nod to the concierge who is quite used to you popping in and out every other weekend.

The elevator ride to the thirteenth floor is short, if ear-popping, and you rap with icy fingers on his door. A few moments later there was a click of the lock and the door opens to reveal Harry.

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Someday Your Child May Cry

Previous: Question | Preparations | Irrational | Confession | Collateral | Thoughtless | Interrupted | Recovering | Irresponsible | Possibility | Devastation | Confrontation




13. Generous

To Mulder’s intense relief, the Gunmen are exactly as sympathetic and supportive as he had promised. They’re happy for Scully, thrilled she might not be denied a shot at motherhood after all, and awed by Mulder’s decision to try and help her conceive.

“Way cool, man,” is all that Frohike has to say, and the other two nod enthusiastically.

They set up the bank account immediately, under the names Joshua and Alicia Lowell, since Mulder is relatively convinced that his George Hale alias has probably been overused to the point of longer being an option. The fake identifications will take longer, but since Scully needs to finish recovering before they can take their next shot, the wait is not an issue.

Langley volunteers some additional, unexpected information: his younger sister, who also lives in DC, had undergone fertility treatments two years ago. She’s now the mother to a set of healthy twin girls. Langley retreats to another room to call her, and returns with the contact information for a Dr. Nyana Sabarwal, for whom his sister nothing but praise.

And so, weeks later, they’re back on the roller coaster, only this time everything seems a thousand times more intense, because it’s their last shot at this. Or, at least, Scully believes that it is, because Mulder is very determinedly not mentioning his plans to pay for all future attempts, should this one not pan out. He’d gone alone to pick their fake identification up from the Gunmen, and while there, he had given them instructions to transfer a significant chunk of his father’s money into the new account. He sees no need to begin the conversation with Scully unless it becomes necessary though; he doesn’t want her dwelling on the idea of this round not working.

With Scully still recovering from her gunshot wound, they aren’t sent back into the field even after she returns to work. The dull routine of background checks is helpful when she’s still in pain, but once she’s better, once the embryo transfer is complete and the waiting game has begun, the lack of distraction quickly becomes a problem. Scully is jumpy and irritable with the other agents in the bullpen, who thankfully put it down to physical discomfort from having been forced to come back to work before she had fully healed.

At noon on the day before Scully’s appointment to take a pregnancy test, Diana Fowley stops by the bullpen.

“Agent Scully,” she says, an enormous, sappy (and clearly fake) smile on her face as she looks down at Scully, who watches her distrustfully. “It’s so good to see you back! How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine, thank you,” says Scully stiffly. Diana exchanges the fake smile for a genuinely warm one as she turns to Mulder.

“Fox,” she says, “I just stopped by to see if you’d like to join me for lunch.” Behind Diana, Mulder catches sight of Scully hunching her shoulders slightly. 

“Actually, Scully and I were about to go out to eat in a few minutes,” he replies. Diana waits, probably for Mulder to invite her to go along, which would probably be the polite thing to do. But right now Mulder is in the business of keeping Scully’s stress levels as low as possible, and while he’s not entirely sure why, Diana Fowley clearly pushes his partner’s buttons. Forcing Scully to sit across from her while she’s trying to eat- something he’s had to cajole her into doing, thanks how nervous she’s been- seems like cruel and unusual punishment.

 “Well… maybe later this week,” then,” says Diana uncertainly, clearly confused by the lack of invitation from Mulder. He doesn’t miss the brief glower that flashes across her face as she watches him helping Scully with her coat, but he can’t dwell on it now. He’ll apologize later, but for now, he’s more concerned with getting Scully out of here before Diana asks some awkward question about how the IVF is going, just to get back at him for excluding her.

Wait a second, he thinks to himself as he walks out of the bullpen, hand at the small of Scully’s back. Diana wouldn’t do that, would she?

He realizes that he’s not sure, not anymore. Six years is a long time to be completely out of touch with someone. And as is evidenced by Mulder’s excitement over the idea of having a child with Scully, a person can change a great deal in six years.

————————————

Mulder had been planning on leaving early to accompany Scully to find out whether or not the last round of IVF had taken, but less than five minutes before they’re due to leave, Kersh strides into the bullpen to place an assignment on Mulder’s desk, to be completed by the end of the day.

“I can just blow it off,” he hisses to Scully, once Kersh has left, but she shakes her head adamantly.

“He’s already pissed at you for running off to New York without permission when I got shot,” Scully whispers back as she gathers up her things. “We can’t afford for you to be any further from his good graces now, when there could be all sorts of awkward questions flying around in a few months.” He gives her a tight grin.

“Let’s hope so,” he says. “I’ll head to your place as soon as I’m done here, okay?” Scully nods, doing her best to make it seem as though she’s not nervous, trying to hide how badly she wants to change her mind and tell Mulder to forget about the assignment and come with her, because she doesn’t think she can take sitting in that office without him by her side if it’s bad news again.

And, of course, it is. She tells herself, the entire drive home, in the elevator up to her apartment, and while Mulder tries his best to comfort her, that it was foolish to hope for this, that it’s for the best, really, that her life is ill suited for motherhood, that at least now she won’t have to worry about this destroying her partnership with Mulder.

Mulder, however, is nowhere near as ready to let this go as Scully is pretending to be.

“Never give up on a miracle,” he says gently, holding her to his chest. She tries to kiss him, but with the tears obscuring her vision, she misses, and her lips hit the corner of his mouth, instead.

“Mulder,” she says, leaning against him, “it’s not that I don’t appreciate the sentiment… but this is it. I can’t afford another attempt.” He draws back and leans his forehead against hers.

“Let me pay for it this time, Scully,” he says. “I have the money. In fact, I have enough money to try as many times as you want.” Her eyes widen.

“I can’t ask you to do that,” she says.

“You’re not asking me to do it,” he says. “I’m asking you to let me. It’s my father’s money, Scully, the money I inherited when he died. And considering its possible origins… I don’t feel right spending it, not unless I’m using it to somehow undo the damage caused by the people who helped him earn it.” Understanding dawns on Scully’s face.

“Would that include private planes to Antarctica and Sno-Cat rentals?” she asks. 

“Absolutely,” he says. “Please. I really want this, Scully.”

“I know you wanted to do this for me, but Mulder, you’re not under any obligation to-”

“You’re not hearing me, Scully,” he says. “I know I’m not obligated. I want to do this. I want it to work so badly and I’m not willing to give up yet.” He cups her face in his hands. “Just one more, Scully. Please? If you decide it’s too much after that, if you don’t feel like you can go through it again, then fine, we’ll stop… but Scully, please don’t let money be the reason you let go of this dream.”

He is her partner in this, as he is in everything else, Scully thinks to herself. He’s completely sincere in his willingness to do this, she can tell… and with a sigh, she decides, for once, to allow herself to accept his help.

“All right, Mulder,” she says. “One more time.”

She thinks that the smile that lights up his face will stay with her for the rest of her life.

LOGAN: EASTER EGGS, TRIVIA, AND THINGS YOU MIGHT HAVE MISSED

DISCLAIMER: I haven;’t found any of these easter eggs on my own, I did a bit of research and gathered the many easter eggs I found from multiple sites. I know there are definitely more easter eggs that I didn’t include because I either didn’t spot/know about them or didn’t think they were important enough. If you noticed that I missed an easter egg that you would like me to include, please feel free to tell me and I’d gladly add it! I also apologize that this list isn’t as long as my other easter egg posts, it’s just been a hectic few days and I haven’t had much time to do more research. Also please let me know if i made any mistakes.

AVALANCHE

Rictor, the leader of the children from the X-23 program, had the power to move rocks and earth with his mind. When Logan looked over Rictor’s file, Dominikos Patrakis was listed as his DNA source. That name is the alter ego of the classic villain, Avalanche.

ALKALI 

Logan referred to Transigen by another name - Alkali. Alkali Lake was the location of the original Weapon X Program, and that same company is the one that eventually became Transigen. The carryover is the reason the company had Logan’s DNA in the first place.

OLD MAN LOGAN

The fourth song on the soundtrack is titled ‘Old Man Logan’. The 'Old Man Logan’ storyline from the comics was the original source for Logan’s story.

GREENWOOD CEMETERY

At the beginning of the movie, when Logan picks some people up at the funeral at Greenwood Cemetery, which has been used throughout Marvel comics. Captain America’s memorial is in Greenwood in the Ultimates storyline, and Sue Storm was buried there after her death. There are also the names “Rogers” and “Peters” on tombstones, which are references to Captain America and Quicksilver. 

CALIBAN

We’ve already seen the character of Caliban in X-Men: Apocalypse! When asked about it, James Mangold said “It’s a funny, messy story of how so often these things are not as coordinated as everyone thinks,” director James Mangold told us at a recent press event for 20th Century Fox. “I actually had written him into our movie, and they didn’t know [he was] in Apocalypse, and then they kind of wrote it in their movie, and they cast someone in their movie and I had not seen it and was working away on mine.” So it was just a big coincidence! Stephen Merchant plays Caliban in Logan, and Tómas Lemarquis plays him in Apocalypse. 

WOLVERINE’S MUTTON CHOPS

At the end of the movie, the children decided to shave of a part of Logan’s beard, which resulted in him having his classic Wolverine mutton chop look.

WOLVERINE’S KATANA

In the movie we see that Logan has a samurai sword (katana), which is a callback The Wolverine and Logan’s many other adventures in Japan.

STATUE OF LIBERTY AND OTHER CALLBACKS

There were many many callbacks to the previous X-Men movies in the dialogue of this movie such as Professor X talking about discovering Logan as a cage fighter, Logan still smoking cigars, the battle at the Statue of Liberty, and Adamantium bullets.

PROFESSOR X’S NEW HOME

Charles’ round home thing is sort of the exact opposite of Cerebro. Its inside mirror the inside of Cerebro, but it acts as a method of surprising his telekinesis.

CHRISTOPHER BRADLEY

Another mutant whose DNA samples were used for the clones was Christopher Bradley, a.k.a. Bolt/Maverick, and we do see a kid who has electricity powers! We last saw Christopher Bradley/Bolt/Maverick in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, but due to the events of X-Men: Days of Future Past, none of the events in X-Men Origins: Wolverine happened (not going to even try explaining the timeline, I don’t even get it completely). (Anyone else recognize the actor, Dominic Monaghan, as Merry from LOTR?)

SHANE

James Mangold has said that he views Logan to be sort of a Western movie and he was inspired by the 1953 movie Shane, which follows an aging, reluctant hero attempting to escape his old life only to be dragged back in, which is a clear parallel to Wolverine’s storyline in this movie. We even see Professor X & Laura watching the movie in the hotel room!

WOLVERINE’S CLASSIC COMICS SUIT

Sadly, Hugh Jackman is done with the Wolverine role, and we never got to see him wear the classic yellow Wolverine costume from the comics (I’m not too upset about him not wearing the costume, in my opinion he looks cooler without it). Anyways, in addition to seeing it in Laura’s comicbook, we see one of the mutant kids holding a doll wearing the classic Wolverine suit.

DEADPOOL 2 TEASER

By now we’ve all seen he teaser trailer for Deadpool 2, and this short little teaser is filled with easter eggs itself!

  • While Deadpool is in the phone booth, the words “Nathan Summers Coming Soon” are written on the frame. Nathan Summers is the real name of the character Cable, who is going to be in the Deadpool sequel.
  • In addition to the very obvious Logan posters in the background, there’s also a Firefly poster. Firefly is a tv show created by Joss Wheadon, who also directed The Avengers (note: Deadpool & Logan & the rest of the X-Men universe movies don’t take place in the same universe as The Avengers, aka the MCU) Anyways, some fans have theorized that the Firefly poster could be a hint that we could see Nathan Fillion in Deadpool 2. 
  • UPDATE: The Firefly poster could also be a reference to Morena Baccarin - she plays Inara in Firefly and was Vanessa in Deadpool (she will reprise her role in the sequel). 
  • The huge chunk of text at the end of the trailer is an actual book report for The Old Man and the Sea. I don’t know the connection or why it was done (I’m presuming it’s just a joke) but if anyone knows, feel free to let me know and I’ll update this post.

i’m opening commissions for the first time in 7+ years. yikes lol. this is to help fund me going to SDCC with my buds. since my wrist behaves better with pencil and paper, i’m only opening 1 digital slot [full colour or b/w ] this round. the rest will be traditional pencil art

[i am not offering inked/colours at this time.]

more examples and prices under the cut, cos long post is long.

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ptw30  asked:

Hihi! You mentioned on AO3 you have no prompts for Ulaz and Shiro right now, so...if you're still taking prompts, would you mind writing one about Ulaz and Shiro - maybe at the Blade headquarters? Thanks!

Ohhhh I do not mind. I do not mind at all.

Technically they aren’t at the Blade headquarters here, but. Um. I’m not sorry. 

:D

Kolivan is not pleased when Ulaz calls him from halfway across the galaxy.

“There were no other options,” Ulaz repeats, for the third time. Kolivan stares back at him from the communication screen, silent and impassive. His mask is down, but it’s no improvement: Kolivan’s face is nearly as stoic and unreadable as if he had the mask up.

Nearly. Ulaz isn’t fooled. The tick in the corner of Kolivan’s eye and the small flare of his nostrils give him away.

“Be that as it may,” Kolivan says. His tone speaks volumes, too: brusque, blunt, syllables sharper and harsher than usual. ‘Not pleased’ is an understatement. “I cannot permit you to come blindly back to headquarters after such a foolish sacrifice.”

“My actions were not foolish,” Ulaz insists, defensive and heated. The comm unit in the stolen Galra ship is small, made smaller by the tracking devices Ulaz ripped out and dismantled with his bare hands. The ship was intended for short journeys; it was never meant to make the long trek Ulaz faces now. “Against your timing, perhaps, but not foolish. Thace is still on board. He will remain as informant for as long as physically and feasibly possible.”

“The choice was not yours to make.”

“And yet I have made it.”

“At what cost?” Kolivan asks. The comm image blurs for a tick before it steadies, stable. “Your plan has failed. This was your alternative?”

Ulaz casts a glance over his shoulder. Shiro’s asleep, propped up against the far wall - ‘far’ is a generous statement. This ship is too small. Shiro’s tucked his back into a corner, his arm cradled to his chest. He’s sleeping off the drug and what Ulaz is fairly certain is a concussion.

“No,” Ulaz admits, quietly, “This was not part of my plan.”

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S2 Talk Time wrap-up

As something of a well-known post might have told you, the middle of Season 2 definitely lost its way – by both subjective evaluation of content and also by looking at its statistics.

Contrary to popular belief, the powers that be *were* paying attention to everyone’s displeasure, because 2C veered sharply into recovery mode, racking up an average for female talk time that exceeded 2A and gave us the only talk time outlier – a high one! – once the whole season was accounted for.

Quick & Dirty S2 Stats:

  • A single episode averaged about 41 minutes of airtime.
  • Speaking took up an average of 28 minutes and 12 seconds per episode.
  • Of this, women spoke for an average of 17 minutes, 26 seconds per episode– 61.8% of the time.
  • Men spoke for an average of 10 minutes, 47 seconds per episode– 38.2% of the time.
  • Average talk time for men didn’t change much between the midpoint of the season and the end, but the average time for women dropped by over a minute.

Season 2 splits for additional analysis:

  • 2A = episodes 1-8
  • 2B = episodes 9-17
  • 2C = episodes 18-22

Other notes:

  • MIA regulars & recurring characters
    • Maggie – 18 total episodes
    • James – 16 total episodes
    • Lena Luthor – 12 total episodes
    • Lillian Luthor – 8 total episodes
    • Snapper Carr – 8 total episodes
    • M’gann M’orzz – 7 total episodes
    • Cat Grant – 4 total episodes

  • Gender distribution of background voices
    They came so close to doing well:
    • 2A: 1 female : 1.67 male voices
    • 2B: 1 female : 1.64 male voices
    • 2C: 1 female : 4.00 male voices

Other interesting thing that happened: talk times across the whole season spawned a normal distribution curve.

Here’s how the episodes were distributed:

  • 40-49.9% women speaking – 4 episodes (2A - 0; 2B - 3; 2C - 1)
  • 50-59.9% women speaking – 6 episodes (2A - 1; 2B - 4; 2C - 1)
  • 60-69.9% women speaking – 7 episodes (2A - 5; 2B - 1; 2C - 1)
  • 70-79.9% women speaking – 4 episodes (2A - 2; 2B - 1; 2C - 1)
  • 80-89.9% women speaking – 1 episode   (2A - 0; 2B - 0; 2C - 1)

Basically: 2A had a narrower, but still normal distribution, 2B skewed low (7/9 episodes at 59.9% or less), and 2C was evenly distributed across the whole range.

This will make a lot more sense when you see it spread out:

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