also some of the writing is really bad but i just had to get it done with

Okay listen up losers I'm about to prove a fucking point.

So my presentation will be about proving season 3 Shiro is a clone and why DreamWorks made it too easy. I rewatched a crapton on episodes to make this, I need to sleep. 

If you guys didn’t notice the first thing Clone Shiro, umm wait imma call him Kuro Kuro looks at is his hand and a Galra symbol.

And that in and of itself is a big clue because there’s already a lot of meaning behind that since season 2. In which, Hunk and that team discussed how the arm can be used against them.

Memory is key! How could Galra have Shiro’s memories? The arm! Like Hunk said, if it could create memories than it’s pretty safe to say it can record them too.

Linking that with the shot of the Galra emblem is a huge deal in symbolism. Trust me I’m an English major, I deal with this shit all the time.

(I’m writing this on my laptop and phone at the same time, godspeed)


Speaking of symbolism, Ulaz made an appearance when Kuro was dazed



(Is that even Ulaz? I can’t tell I’m bad with faces)

This does two things. Reaffirm Kuro’s undying trust with his arm, and make a connection with Galra as a comrade. Lemme explain;

During Shiro’s ‘I can suddenly remember shit’ scene in season 2? He die-hard believes the memories are his and not a [insert dream here] from Galra, by showing him Ulaz they are trying to recreate that same feeling.

By showing him a Galra (regardless of being evil or not) you’re connecting the dots with trust.

That could be a good reason why the Galra decided to give Shiro a weaponized arm in the first place. Why would they power him up for shits and giggles? Haggard herself even said this:

(Bitch, no thanks.) They wouldn’t have given him a cool fighting arm just so he could be cooler in the arena. That’s fucking idiotic to arm a prisoner. (sorry)

This wouldn’t even be the first time Haggard had some evil version of Shiro

Remember this scene from season 1? Cuz I sure fucking do.

Speaking of that arm, why would they take it in the first place? Listen, it’s already pretty fishy they gave him a super arm but why would they take it at all? Dare I say, D N A ?

This leads me back to this scene here:

Why would Kuro hurt himself? A French term can explain this, ‘L’appel du vide’ translation: The call of the void. Basically, your brain is telling you to self-destruct in order to take control of a situation.  Now we already discussed how the Galra controls his brain sort of so that’s that.

Now I know what you’re saying: Oh! But that’s so he could close the wound!!

Listen, man, I did training with an Army doctor on quick fixes for medical emergencies. Now I’m not saying I’m an expert cuz I’m not, but if Kuro did that do it to heal himself up it wasn’t done correctly. Or at least done accurately…. Especially with an unknown power. This might be wrong, it was a brief training,  so don’t take this part too seriously.

Adding to this point:

If you’ve ever seen anyone wake up from a long coma, and I mean  l o n g  coma, they don’t have full feeling in their muscles and tend to fall because they do not have full control of their limbs. I’m assuming by the hair this hasn’t been up and about for enough time to get that effect.

Speaking of hair, yes guys, Kuro’s hair is WAY too long to be Shiro.

(Lmao, Shiro/Kuro w/ long hair; hit or miss??)


Kuro’s hair shows that he hasn’t cut it in at least 1 ½ years. There might not be much context of how long he was missing but I’m sure as hell it’s couldn’t be more than a few months since Keith was searching through the Glara rubble.

<Man, all these analytical essays are finally paying off>

This scene here:

Is a big clue. For real why would the Black Lion do that? Send him into more danger? That’s not right.

Well, guess what, she didn’t.

Remeber this gem? I sure fucking do.

She sent him with someone he trusts, Matt. This really makes sense cuz mATT JUST HASN’T SHOWED UP BUT IS OBVIOUSLY REALLY IMPORTANT *cough* sorry, I don’t know what came over me….

Not only does Shiro trust him but so does Pidge, and I know those two never really had a connection but they kinda all share a state of thought while forming Voltron…

So the Black Lion theoretically has seen Pidge’s thoughts and stuff. Theoretically Black has two reasons why to trust Matt.

The Black Lion has so many reasons to send Shiro to Matt and not some Galra base.

This can also help understand why the Black Lion didn’t trust Kuro.

From what I’ve seen (or remember seeing at 4 AM, I haven’t slept in 45ish hours guys, help) all of you guys think that Black knows that’s not Shiro from the Connection they have but that might not be it!

Kuro thinks he’s Shiro, he has the same memories, the same body, the same scar on the face! So the Connection can still be there, what he doesn’t have is Matt with him.

Which wouldn’t make sense because Black sent him there, so it’s ridiculous cuz “hey I sent you to be with your buddy? Why didn’t you bring him along to see his sister who has been searching for him like crazy???”

That could be why the Black Lion found Kuro and trusted that was the OG but then changed its mind and was like ‘no thanks’ when she saw Matt wasnt with him.

I mean look how….happy?? She looks when they find him!

Why would that change after the fact? The Connection had to be there in order to sense him in the first place. It just makes sense.

Also look at the symbolism here again:


Kuro is in a Galra ship, it’s so subtle you might not even catch it (unless you’re used to over analyzing everything in order to fit 3 more pages into a term paper like me)

Instead of animating Kuro getting physically off the fighter they show them apart, separated from Black. They show him in enemy weaponry.  

As an enemy kinda…


(I’m getting too into this…)


This is Kuro while he’s being cloned

This is Kuro after he’s ‘escaping’

Sounds like the plan was a success, but all that happened was Kuro getting away? I don’t know about you but prisoners stay locked up, unless they aren’t.

They even say Kuro’s is approved for Operation Kuron!


Also from that scene:

Kuro was given that codename ‘Subject Y0XT39′

But Shiro already had a codename, and it wasnt that.

Its ‘Prisoner 117-9875′

Subject and Prisoner are two different things and two different codes.


Kuron is already a huge fucking clue. I donno know if you seen this yet but,

Shiro’s name is literally White and the opposite is Black or Kuro which sounds a lot like Kuron


If you think that’s just a coincidence then try this:

Just try telling me this isn’t legit?


To add just a bit more, Kuro and Keith clashed a lot while both trying to lead Voltron.

He also made it so Keith looked like a weak leader, which he was not once he got more use to the role.


Appearance wise, Kuro is different from Shiro in a low key way. First off both haircuts he has where different from Shiro’s. They’re all horrible but that’s a different story.

His cloths is different too, it shows more skin. The sleeve shows his arm and he took off his glove. Symbolically this means he trying to be more open, more free, more approachable.

This would make it easier to give the wrong feeling of trust to the team, which is the plan Kuro was given


*searching through my notes* okay did I miss anything…? Ah Yes!!


When Shiro first meets those two freedom fighters the transmission radio picks of two things; something less important about Lotor and Voltron.

Which one was ignored and which one was heard?

Yes guys, Kuro didn’t even pay attention to Lotor cuz that’s not what he was told to do. He was told to find out about Voltron which, he did.

Also with those freedom fighters, we learn this:


It wouldn’t have been easy to escape injured and tired. When he escaped the first time it was with the help of Ulaz. They didn’t even try keeping him there, he wasn’t restrained and didn’t have any guards. The only thing trying to stop him were those androids they know Kuro/Shiro could easily defeat.

And last thing.


And I think this is the most important thing.







He didn’t finish that sentence.


He didn’t say he wasn’t a traitor.


He didn’t have too.



This concludes my presentation on ‘Proving That’s not Shiro but Kuro the Clone’

Thank you for your time.

For my next presentation, I will talk about why we should save Kuro and love him indefinitely

Some hilarious writing prompts

Alright so a few days ago I decided to look for some hilarious text posts on tumblr and I laughed so much I just had to write some prompts! (is possible to be customized)
(Send me requests with 1/1+ prompt/s. I write about a lot of fandoms and also a lot of different things : one shots/scenarios/imagines/headcanons/chats/conversations/aesthetics/alomst anything) REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

*1. Do I look like I give a fuck?
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*2. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on you again for taking advantage of my compassionate and forgiving nature! HOw dare you.
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*3. Me? Overreacting? Probably.
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4. I used to be passive aggressive, but now I’m aggressively passive. Don’t mess with me kiddo. I’ll be right here. I’ll fucking forgive you.
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5. A: Whar are you doing?
B: Avoiding.
A: Avoiding what?
B: Everything.
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*6. This was impulsive. Probably shouldn’t have done it. WHO CARES?
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*7. You’re really cute and it’s ruining my life because I think about kissing you all the time.
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8. A: It’s okay, I’m not mad.
    A (5 mins later): Actually? You can go to Hell.
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9. I hate people who get personally offended when I’m in a bad mood, likeI’m not mad at you Susan (name), I’m mad at the world!
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10. A to A: Bitch, if you actually applied yourself in like…anything, you’d be dangerous ,damn my lazy ass.
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11. I don’t know what I’m feeling, but there’s a lot of it.
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12. Not to dictate your life, but drop your shitty friends.
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13. That sounds like responsibility and I want no part in it.
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14. Why am I better than everyone? Jesus, life’s hard.
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15. A: How do you make someone holy?
B: You beat the hell out of them.
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16. A: I’m amazed of how insignificant we actually are.
B: Not me, I’m important.
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17. If anyone can do it, then someone who isn’t me can do it.
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18. In the old days of one week ago things were different. Now look at us - slightly older than we were back then, other clothes and such.
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19. I’m not going to claim that I know everything, I’m simply going to act like it.
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*20. You have to “see it to believe it”, so as long as I’m not looking I don’t have to believe in anything.
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21. I’m visualising a powerful mystical energy at the moment.
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22. If I don’t learn anything from my mistakes then I don’t have to consider them mistakes in the first place.
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23. Why the hell is there always this one weak bitch in the group that isn’t down with murder? No offence though.
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24. A: If you ever feel stupid, or weak, or powerless, just remember that I, am not.
B: THanks.
A: You’re welcome.
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25. I wanna do dirty stuff with you like farming.
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26. A: What are you reading?
B: 10 tips for beutiful hair the Government doesn’t want you to know.
A: wHAT the fuck?
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27. A: I’m tired of these constant near-death experiences.
B: (opinional) don’t be a whiny bitch, bitch.
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28. Man, how many eye contact until date?
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29. God has a favourite comedy tv series and it’s called “my life”.
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30. Sometimes all you can say is “yikes” and then just on the fuck on.
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31. Why is everyone having their mid-life crisis at like 19?
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32. It’s a beutiful day to give me money, honey.
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33. Women aren’t complicated, you’re just dumb.
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34. Well this social situation isn’t going the way I acted it out in the shower.
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35. No offence, but my favourite hobby is staying hydrated and beautiful.
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36. I’m actually pretty cool if you give me like 5 tries to get it right.
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37. Today I’m feeling cloudy with a chance of sarcastic.
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38. Be prapared to add a cute emoji next to my name in your contacts list because you’re gonna love me.
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*39.A: Babe, I’m not grabbing your boob, I’m grabbing your heart.
B: That’s my right boob though.
A: Babe.
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40.Every machine is a smoke machine if you operate it wrong enough.
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41.What makes me feel like a failure the most is when I can’t remember the answet to a Harry Potter trivia question.
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42.I hate it when I’m really nice…And then people are just not that nice? Like what the fuck.
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43.Don’t look at me in that tone of voice.
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*44.Is your name candle? Because I wanna blow you.
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*45. So, was that just awkward eye contact, or were we checking eachother out?-

46.You know, having feelings is ruining my reputation of being a heartless bitch.
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47.My turn ons? Well I don’t know, maybe some fucking common sense.
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48.I may seem like an angry person on the surface, but deep inside I’m actually angrier.
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49.I ship me and that boat.
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50.Listen. I did mean to make you upset and I do think your opinions are shit. But you’re still my friend so it’s okay.
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51.Because my two moods are like glitter and death.
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*52.My kink is closing the fucking bathroom door, because no one wants to see you fucking pee!
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53.If I go to Hell I’m gonna constantly torture everyone by continuously asking if it’s hot in here or is it just me.
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54.Oh my God are you seeing this shit?
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55.Graduated top of my class from Hogwarts school of bitchcraft and misery.

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56.A (shows up at your door 10 years after we had an argument): aND ANOTHER THING

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57.I’ll betray all of you in the Hunger Games.

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58.Well, well, well, if it isn’t my old friend, the dawing realization that I fucked up real bad.

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59.I’m a screamer. Not sexually, just life in general.

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60.I’m not racist, I hate everyone equally.

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61.Tell me I’m cute or something, so I can roll my eyes at you, but then blush when I think about it later.

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62.You know when your hair is greasy and it makes you feel so bad about yourself? And your entire life. Everything is awful because my hair is greasy.

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63.True love is having a crush even when he got a haircut you know.

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64.Emotions? You know, I just push my tear back into my eye and tell it “Not now, you little bastard!”.

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65.Are we gonna hold hands, or what?

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66.My soul leaving my body, but with one of those slide whistle sound effects.

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67.A: I love you.

B: What if I got a bowl cut?

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68.I should really stop planning my future around being rich or famous…but I can’t.

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69.I’m aggressively thibking about having sex with you and trying to keep a straight face at the same time. Do you know hOW hard that is?

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70.My opinion is no.

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71.Did you fall from heaven, because so did Satan.

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72.What to hear a fairytale? Once upon a time you weren’t such a little bitch.

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73.Which is messier - my life or my hair?

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74.How can you face the problem when the problem is your face?

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75.Sometimes I wonder what it feels like to know wHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON.

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76.Read a girl who dates books.

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77.My hands are cold let me put them in your pants.

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78.I’m sorry, you must be at least level 4 friend to unlock my tragic backstory.

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79.My therapist once told me that I have this obsession with seeking revenge…we’ll see about that.

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80.You have lips, I have lips…interesting.

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81.Do my dark undereye circles and unwashed hair turn you on?

/PART TWO/ PART THREE /

anonymous asked:

I need the story of the Underground Shakespearian Ring

Okay, so the school I went to for 9th grade had this really bizarre grading setup that I still don’t understand- for some reason, instead of the teachers writing up and grading tests and exams and the like, all the work was sent to an unknown third party for them to grade??? It made no sense.

Now, for the most part, the school had decent teachers, and they would just teach the curriculum correctly and then you wouldn’t run into problems with the grading. My English teacher was not one of those teachers.

So like, she hated me pretty early on- she was my homeroom teacher and thought it was disrespectful that I slept in homeroom in the mornings (I was on sleeping pills and they never wore off completely until around 10am), I never had the vocab homework in on time (someone kept breaking into my locker and stealing my vocab books I had to buy a new one like five times), she thought it was “inherently pessimistic and stuck up” when she caught me reading a book called ‘Ninth Grade Slays’ (it was about vampires, not her?), and during our Greek Mythology unit I kept correcting her about the name pronunciations of the gods (she pronounced Hephaestus as Hepatitis one time holy shit). 

Anyway, her feelings on me aside, her teaching skills were shoddy at best. But I had had way worse teachers, so had the rest of the class, and Greek myths are pretty straight-up in what’s going on, so no one really had trouble with the third-party tests.

Then we get to the Romeo and Juliet unit.

Now, fun fact: Shakespeare has always come pretty easily to me. Like, to the point where I sometimes forget/fail to understand that other people have an incredibly hard time translating his works. (I told this whole story to my friends in the school I went to for 10th/11th/12th grade and when the drama department put on ‘Midsummers Night Dream’ one year, more than half the cast tried to get me to translate their scripts and monologues for them lmao).

So, anyway, I’m just a girl, reading Romeo and Juliet and digging how it’s going…and then the teacher starts ‘translating’ it.

Um.

I cannot sift through all the bullshit this woman was spewing, but let’s just say that my favorite part is during Romeo’s spew about Rosaline, there’s one part where he says something like ‘with cupid’s arrow/she hath diane’s will’, and the teacher was taking this to mean Rosaline was a Super Lesbian who was breaking the law or something and running away with her lover Diane, which would be a rad storyline, sure, but like…I’m just raising my hand like “Um Ma’am, Diana is the Roman goddess of chastity. What Romeo meant is that she told him she’s sworn off love and is probably becoming a nun?” and this woman just got. So angry. Like, excuse me, you are a student, you’re here to learn, so you clearly don’t know anything about this (I read Romeo and Juliet for the first time in like preschool whoops). Anyway, she continues on making up her own plot to the play, and I…well I was basically Hermione Fucking Granger at this point I couldn’t just sit there and listen to someone be this wrong about something omfg??? She just got angrier and angrier and stopped calling on me after a while.

So for a couple lessons I’m just left to seethe quietly, but one day after class this girl I knew since grade school came up to me and was like “Could you…? Tell me what the hell we’re supposed to be learning?” and I didn’t even like her but I liked the validation of being someone’s Chosen Teacher so I wrote out a summary for her of everything we had covered so far so she could actually write a comprehendible essay for our homework that night.

But THEN the during the class when we got our essays back, she made a HUGE DEAL, like ‘oh Molly, it wasn’t bad enough that you’ve been failing this course material, now you have to drag your friends into it by trying to re-write the play?’ (l m a o). Like this bitch had literally tried to fight me on ‘Paris is the guy Juliet’s father wants her to marry’ and she didn’t even put a grade on my essay where I said the play only ended in tragedy because of how young and naïve the kids were, that if they had taken a breather and thought things through it probably would’ve been fine (it was a damn good essay and I stand by it). But anyway, she’s trying to make me out to my classmate’s as someone who’s trying to sabotage their education for laughs.

This backfired on her.

See, it dawned on people one by one, that she was only teaching the wrong material -> so they wouldn’t know the right material -> so when they eventually would take the exams they would only have her crazy answers -> which the third party graders wouldn’t know about -> everyone fails this course that’s like half the overall grade of the year.

Most students consider that a problem.

So suddenly the class has decided I’m the fucking Shakespeare Whisperer or something, and one by one start begging me for help. At first I was confused, because as I said, it’s so easy for me that I didn’t realize literally the entire class was lost out of their asses here. omfg. So I was really getting hassled here but I didn’t want my entire class to fail you know???? So I started meeting with people during study halls or texting them after school so they knew what was going on. And then they started telling people in this teacher’s other classes, including upperclassmen who were lost as fuck, so this was quickly spiraling out of control on my end, but overall people were really starting to understand the plays better!! So I was feeling really great.

But then, the teacher noticed that none of the homework getting handed in to her matched up with her crazy translations, and knew I was the sole person to blame (naturally). She literally tried to get me suspended over this, she went to the school’s disciplinarian!

Note: This guy, Mr. C, knew I was a God damn angel- my science class was off the charts, inappropriately awful, so every time one of our science teacher’s wanted to give the entire class detention, instead of calling Mr. C up to the class room as was the rule, they’d send me down to get him so he’d know to write up every student except for me. So when my English teacher dragged me in there he was looking her like “What on Earth could this girl have possibly done to piss you off?” 😂😂

And when she explained he looked at her for a very long moment, glanced at me with a signature ‘Office’ Reaction Face™ , turned back to her and was like “You want her suspended…for starting a study group?” and I was CHOKING.

So that really pissed her off and they started fighting and this was a very overworked and Done man so at some point he gave up and was like “I’m not suspending her but fine we can put a ban on the study group if you leave my office” omfg. So all the other students get notified and now they’re back to freaking out about the upcoming exams.

So like two days later, I’m at lunch, complaining about this to one of my friends who had a different English teacher and thus no problem, and I’m on this whole angry rant (Because I’m pissed, a bunch of kid’s grades are gonna get fucked up because of this! They just wanted to do well! I just wanted to help them!) and my friends staring at me quietly the whole time and when I finish I’m like “What?” and she’s just like “…Molly did you literally start up Dumbledore’s Army in our fucking school?” and I died on scene.

But then I started thinking about the comparison and I was like? You know fucking what? If Harry Potter can get those kids to pass their fucking DADA test I can help kids pass their fucking English Exam. Bring it the fuck on, Umbridge.

So I started Spreading The Word that anyone who needs help with their Shakespeare course can still get help, we just all need to meet up once to hash out the details. After some back and forth notes and deliberations, we ended up meeting in the school library, which was hilarious for a few reasons:

1) It was directly across the hall from this teacher’s classroom.

2) It was actually a converted janitors closet, way smaller than all the other classrooms, and there were like 50 people shoved in there; Not exactly an ideal Room of Requirement

3) The library carried no Shakespeare texts, but had the entire Harry Potter series on display to see when you first walked in

But anyway, despite the fact that we were literally three feet away from her door while we were doing this, our teacher was none the wiser of the meeting. We worked out a game plan- everyone writes out bullshit essays that align with what the teacher’s expecting. After she grades those and gives them back, they get them to me- slipping them in my locker, handing it to me discreetly in the halls or in another class, what have you. I then try to power through the dizzying amount of confusion radiating out of the teacher’s mouth and onto these papers, and more or less write out better translation of what was going on in whatever scene they covered, what the highlights they needed to know were, stuff like that, and then slip it back to them in similar discreet fashion (so the teacher/disciplinarian wouldn’t see me and get suspicious ; also because I was like 15 and wanted to feel like a super cool secret agent). They would then keep my copies and use them as study guides for the upcoming exams, where they would then answer all the questions correctly, the way the third party graders would mark correctly, and pass the exams + the bullshit essays would get them high marks in the teacher’s homework grades. The teacher never caught on to what was happening, just thought her students finally started paying attention to her.

All in all, it was a complicated mess, but it fucking worked. I don’t think anyone failed their exams that year. Will I ever be cooler? No. I think I fucking peaked when I was 15.

The Dos and Don’ts of Beginning a Novel:  An Illustrated Guide

I’ve had a lot of asks lately for how to begin a book (or how not to), so here’s a post on my general rules of thumb for story openers and first chapters!  

Please note, these are incredibly broad generalizations;  if you think an opener is right for you, and your beta readers like it, there’s a good chance it’s A-OK.  When it comes to writing, one size does not fit all.  (Also note that this is for serious writers who are interested in improving their craft and/or professional publication, so kindly refrain from the obligatory handful of comments saying “umm, screw this, write however you want!!”)

So without further ado, let’s jump into it!

Don’t: 

1.  Open with a dream. 

“Just when Mary Sue was sure she’d disappear down the gullet of the monstrous, winged pig, she woke up bathed in sweat in her own bedroom.”

What?  So that entire winged pig confrontation took place in a dream and amounts to nothing?  I feel so cheated! 

Okay, not too many people open their novels with monstrous swine, but you get the idea:  false openings of any kind tend to make the reader feel as though you’ve wasted their time, and don’t usually jump into more meaty action of the story quickly enough.  It makes your opening feel lethargic and can leave your audience yawning.

Speaking of… 

2.  Open with a character waking up.  

This feels familiar to most of us, but unless your character is waking up to a zombie attack or an alien invasion, it’s generally a pretty easy recipe to get your story to drag.

No one picks a book to hear how your character brushes their teeth in the morning or what they’d like to have for dinner.  As a general rule of thumb, we read to explore things we wouldn’t otherwise get to experience.  And cussing out the alarm clock is not one of them.  

Granted, there are exceptions if your writing is exceptionally engaging, but in most cases it just sets a slow pace that will bore you and your reader to death and probably cause you to lose interest in your book within the first ten pages.  

3.  Bombard with exposition.  

Literary characters aren’t DeviantArt OCs.  And the best way to convey a character is not, in my experience, to devote the first ten pages to describing their physical appearance, personality, and backstory.  Develop your characters, and make sure their fully fleshed out – my tips on how to do so here – but you don’t need to dump all that on the reader before they have any reason to care about them.  Let the reader get to know the character gradually, learn about them, and fall in love with them as they would a person:  a little bit at a time.   

This is iffy when world building is involved, but even then it works best when the delivery feels organic and in tune with the book’s overall tone.  Think the opening of the Hobbit or Good Omens.

4.  Take yourself too seriously.

Your opener (and your novel in general) doesn’t need to be intellectually pretentious, nor is intellectual pretense the hallmark of good literature.  Good literature is, generally speaking, engaging, well-written, and enjoyable.  That’s it.  

So don’t concern yourself with creating a poetic masterpiece of an opening line/first chapter.  Just make one that’s – you guessed it – engaging, well-written, and enjoyable. 

5.  Be unintentionally hilarious.

Utilizing humor in your opening line is awesome, but check yourself to make sure your readers aren’t laughing for all the wrong reasons (this is another reason why betas are important.)  

These examples of the worst opening lines in published literature will show you what I mean – and possibly serve as a pleasant confidence booster as well: 

“As the dark and mysterious stranger approached, Angela bit her lip anxiously, hoping with every nerve, cell, and fiber of her being that this would be the one man who would understand – who would take her away from all this – and who would not just squeeze her boob and make a loud honking noise, as all the others had.”

– Ali Kawashima

“She sipped her latte gracefully, unaware of the milk foam droplets building on her mustache, which was not the peachy-fine baby fuzz that Nordic girls might have, but a really dense, dark, hirsute lip-lining row of fur common to southern Mediterranean ladies nearing menopause, and winked at the obviously charmed Spaniard at the next table.”

– Jeanne Villa

“As I gardened, gazing towards the autumnal sky, I longed to run my finger through the trail of mucus left by a single speckled slug – innocuously thrusting past my rhododendrons – and in feeling that warm slime, be swept back to planet Alderon, back into the tentacles of the alien who loved me.”

– Mary E. Patrick

“Before they met, his heart was a frozen block of ice, scarred by the skate blades of broken relationships, then she came along and like a beautiful Zamboni flooded his heart with warmth, scraped away the ugly slushy bits, and dumped them in the empty parking lot of his soul.”

– Howie McClennon

If these can get published, so can you.

Do:

1.  You know that one really interesting scene you’re itching to write?  Start with that.

Momentum is an important thing in storytelling.  If you set a fast, infectious beat, you and your reader will be itching to dance along with it.  

Similarly, slow, drowsy openers tend to lead to slow, drowsy stories that will put you both to sleep.

I see a lot of posts joking about “that awkward moment when you sit down to write but don’t know how to get to that one scene you actually wanted to write about.”  Write that scene!  If it’s at all possible, start off with it.  If not, there are still ways you can build your story around the scenes you actually want to write.

Keep in mind:  if you’re bored, your reader will almost certainly be bored as well.  So write what you want to write.  Write what makes you excited.  Don’t hold off until later, when it “really gets good.”  Odds are, the reader will not wait around that long, and you’re way more likely to become disillusioned with your story and quit.  If a scene is dragging, cut it out.  Burn bridges, find a way around.  Live, dammit. 

2.  Engage the reader.

There are several ways to go about this.  You can use wit and levity, you can present a question, and you can immerse the reader into the world you’ve created.  Just remember to do so with subtlety, and don’t try too hard;  believe me, it shows.  

Here are some of my personal favorite examples of engaging opening lines: 

“In the beginning, the universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move." 

– Douglas Adams, the Restaurant at the End of the Universe.

"It was the day my grandmother exploded.”

– Iain Banks, Crow Road.

“A white Pomeranian named Fluffy flew out of the a fifth-floor window in Panna, which was a grand-new building with the painter’s scaffolding still around it. Fluffy screamed.”

– Vikram Chandra, Sacred Games.

See what I’m saying?  They pull you in and do not let go.

3.  Introduce us to a main character (but do it right.)

“Shadow had done three years in prison. He was big enough and looked don’t-fuck-with-me enough that his biggest problem was killing time. So he kept himself in shape, and taught himself coin tricks, and thought a lot about how much he loved his wife.”

– Neil Gaiman, American Gods.

This is one of my favorite literary openings of all time, because right off the bat we know almost everything we need to know about Shadow’s character (i.e. that he’s rugged, pragmatic, and loving.)   

Also note that it doesn’t tell us everything about Shadow:  it presents questions that make us want to read more.  How did Shadow get into prison?  When will he get out?  Will he reunite with his wife?  There’s also more details about Shadow slowly sprinkled in throughout the book, about his past, personality, and physical appearance.  This makes him feel more real and rounded as a character, and doesn’t pull the reader out of the story.

Obviously, I’m not saying you should rip off American Gods.  You don’t even need to include a hooker eating a guy with her cooch if you don’t want to.  

But this, and other successful openers, will give you just enough information about the main character to get the story started;  rarely any good comes from infodumping, and allowing your reader to get to know your character gradually will make them feel more real.   

4.  Learn from the greats.

My list of my favorite opening lines (and why I love them) is right here.

5.  Keep moving.  

The toughest part of being a writer is that it’s a rare and glorious occasion when you’re actually satisfied with something you write.  And to add another layer of complication, what you like best probably won’t be what your readers will like best. 

If you refuse to keep moving until you have the perfect first chapter, you will never write anything beyond your first chapter.  

Set a plan, and stick to it:  having a daily/weekly word or page goal can be extremely helpful, especially when you’re starting out.  Plotting is a lifesaver (some of my favorite posts on how to do so here, here, and here.)

Keep writing, keep moving, and rewrite later.  If you stay in one place for too long, you’ll never keep going. 

Best of luck, and happy writing.  <3

The signs and how I have experienced them

This is in no way supposed to be accurate to the usual description of signs, i just write down how i have experienced them. I don’t really know why either.


Aries: very quiet at first but will bloom up if they trust you. indecisive, understanding, and sweet. loyal friend who will never judge you. doesn’t have a lot of opinions on things. likes to just chill and let it all happen. likes hugs a lot!

Taurus: loud and super ambitious. wants things done and wants it now. risk taker. gets angry quickly. very intense. cares about you but shows it in unusual ways. super prideful. enthusiastic!! loves buying new things. loves talking.

Gemini: super nice?? how do you do it. very touchy and wants everybody to like them.  always comes up with great ideas. insecure but really rocks. great team worker and always listens to you. trouble standing up for themselves sometimes.

Cancer: will do everything with you. always up for having fun, but also loves staying in and chilling. hyper wow. doesn’t take shit from anyone.  you insult their friend? you’re going down, they do not play. doesn’t care about other peoples opinions. kinda aggressive?

Leo: the person that everybody admires and loves and honestly?  so cool and such a good person. kind of an ego issue but it’s okay. honest and loves it. tends to be dramatic but if you push that aside very sweet and has some issues. loyal friend and a good leader.

Virgo: super quirky but everyone loves it. has a certain dry humor that just makes you crack up. bad with people. really insecure but such a nice person. artsy. nervous, really talented. works hard for everything. zooms in on their face in pictures. stop you’re beautiful. super fun clothing!

Libra: super chill on the outside but is actually great at sensing emotions and gets overwhelmed sometimes. fun and spontaneous. sporty!! great at making friends. hits your butt.pats your head when they pass you. mom tendencies, but also get super drunk and do stupid stuff tendencies. 

Scorpio: laughs so much. everybody loves them it’s unreal. makes everything seem chill and cool. supportive friend. kind of mean sometimes. likes to mess around and have fun, but still manages their grades. Scorpios are some of the best friends i’ve ever had. 

Sagittarius:  wants all the information!! plans everything and wants to read about everything. loves books so much. super supportive and honest. will always admit it when they are wrong and apologize. gets overwhelmed sometimes but it’s okay we still love you. afraid of failure. 

Capricorn: cold at first but is actually a nice bean who laughs very quickly. very responsible and mature. people always ask them for advice. sarcastic humor. just wants to be loved. will never judge you. will rant about absolutely nothing to you. such big dreams that i know you will achieve. doesn’t like sharing their emotions and that’s okay. a little mean sometimes

Aquarius:  loves everything unique and aesthetic. cares for fashion and rocks it. honestly very sweet but can be shady. gives people too many chances. always putting others first. has a lot of crushes on people. innocent and pure. doesn’t deserve the shit life gives them. confident yet insecure.

Pisces: such a good comforter? knows exactly what to say. good listener. has a lot of ideas for the future that i fully support. dreams about their perfect partner. positive. there’s something so wise and old about them it fascinates me. so many thoughts. kind of clingy sometimes but we love it.

We’ve talked a lot about the repeated deaths, but that’s not all that can happen in this kind of situation. What kind of injuries do you think the IPRE dealt with until the year was up and they were reset?

Magnus loses an arm. It’s an early cycle and he shouldn’t have had to make that kind of sacrifice, but he did it to help someone else and no one is really surprised. No one knows what to do - should they offer to help him with things? Would that be insulting? When Magnus comes far too close to losing his other arm in the same year, he learns to ask for help when he needs it.

Merle is too close to an explosion and loses his hearing. Lucretia offers him one of her notebooks, and it’s both a wonderful idea and a mistake because he uses it both to communicate and to leave notes all over the ship. They’re very dad-like notes, commanding various crew members to pick up this mess or go do some chore. When they try to argue Merle just shakes his head and motions helplessly at his ears, even though they are writing him a note in return. It’s not long afterwards that they reach a world that has sign language and everyone learns the basics. 

Lup has been burned, badly, but it takes a while before she lets anyone help her manage the pain because she doesn’t want to feel better when she can’t do that for Taako because he died in a fucking fire. It’s Barry who finally catches her with her guard down late one night, and he and Merle find a combination of cooling spells and herbs that make the pain (the physical pain) more bearable.

Davenport is blinded, and for a while he won’t accept any help. He’s the captain, he’ll figure it out on his own. He tries to pilot the ship with muscle memory and crashes it somewhere remote, and he just screams in frustration at losing the one thing he’s the best at, even if it’s only for a year. He’s quiet for a while, not interacting and going through the motions as well as he can, until Magnus wanders into the cockpit and asks what the big, red button is for. Davenport explains, more of the crew wander in, and he ends telling all of them about the ins and outs of their vessel. It’s a good day, and after that (both that year and after) he spends less time in the cockpit and more time with his family.

Lucretia can’t walk anymore, not easily and then not at all, so Magnus offers to give her piggyback rides everywhere she wants to go whenever she wants. Lup and Barry make her a chair (permanently levitating so that stairs aren’t an issue), but she finds she likes the company while exploring the new towns. She takes up Magnus’s offer more often than anyone expects her to.

A landslide that takes Lup catches Taako, too; he takes a serious blow to the head. When he wakes up he doesn’t speak, and doesn’t really look at anyone. But he listens to them, he can hear them, and eventually Lucretia picks up some journals and sits with him. At first she reads, but eventually she just shares interesting things that happened that day and gossip; even though his expression doesn’t change she can tell he’s enjoying the conversation from the way his ears flick around with as much movement as always. When the year is done they still gossip, but it’s never one-sided. (Except when it is, years and years later. Taako has a bad day and Lucretia offers to read to him, and he lets her. It’s a little sign that things are… better. Improving.)

One year there are days Barry hurts too much to walk on his own, and Lucretia’s chair makes a second appearance. Lup isn’t there, or Magnus or Merle, so the ship is quiet more often than not… until Taako and Barry go barreling down the hallway together clinging to the chair and targeting Davenport of Lucretia. It shouldn’t be funny but it is - one light and fun moment during a particularly bad cycle.

hello and welcome to my first studyblr post!! i’ve seen a ton of these around, but not many have all the tips i’ve learned throughout high school. i go to a private preparatory school and i’m top 5 in my class and i lead many extracurriculars. last year was the CRAZIEST year of my life, but with a certain mindset & only a few all nighters, i managed all A’s in all advanced courses. So, here are the tips i’ve learned!!

  • write stuff down!!!! i know it is the most obvious thing, but writing down anything you need to remember, whether that be homework, tests, quizzes, events, due dates, reminders…anything! checking off these things at night is so satisfying and you won’t forget anything important. when i’m in the #zone, my mind often thinks of stupid questions/thoughts. I’ll jot these questions/misc. thoughts unrelated to what i’m focusing on to come back to later and explore!! (for example, i was doing an frq for econ and i thought of doing this post, so i wrote it down in my journal.)
  • organization. there are so many masterposts out there to help you with organization. my method included binders & comp. notebooks.. that’s about it! i’m not very organized
  • get to know teachers. this is probably what helped a lot my junior year. not only is maintaining good relationships with teachers good for you, it can be beneficial to your grade as well. when you make friends with teachers you always have someone to talk/rant to & they always give you the inside gossip about teachers/other students. have coffee/lunch w them, or talk about theories from the class they teach. they give you a lot of perspectives on the course and cool ideas!
  • manage your time. again, another broad statement. but what i did every night kept me sane. my schedule every day after classes (including saturday) was: 
    • practice until 5 
    • extracurriculars until dinner (6:30-7) 
    • minimal homework until done (usually 1-2 hours)
    • study for 1+ hours if needed (8-9 pm)
    • enjoyment time (at least 30 min)

while this may not be a lot for most people, it was a lot for me and i needed time to make myself happy. school and friends make me happy, but so does alone time. putting this minimum of 30 min a day (if i don’t fall asleep before that) really helped me get through demanding courses because i had an incentive. this schedule also helped me avoid procrastination!! ALSO, I prioritized like hell. Honestly, if homework was a completion grade, I wouldn’t try at all unless i needed the practice. Same goes with classes. the ones i had high A’s in, i would sometimes sacrifice a homework grade in order to get enough sleep or study for another test. while this is not the most ethical way of doing it, it helped.

  • Avoid procrastination. procrastination is your worst enemy. I used to be so bad, but now i’m getting better. this is key. in order to beat procrastination, you have to have self discipline. simple as that. get inspired. for many of you, it’s your studyblr community, for me it was for personal pride and competition. you must execute to get the job done. it will be worth it in the end.
  • do the little things. put away the phone. put music on if it helps. stretch a little. get some water. get as content and comfortable as you can when you study.
  • SLEEP!!!! that’s all i can say. sleep sleep sleep. it’s important. i know life is busy, but make time for sleep if you can. mental illness is a bitch, and sometimes it can make falling asleep hard. i know. just try your best & that’s enough. anytime i had free time during the day, i slept. nothing is more important than sleep, and if i didn’t get at least 8 hours of sleep the night before, i tried to catch up as best as i could. your brain needs a break to refuel and you will feel refreshed the next day. 
  • Eating healthy. i rarely see this tip around (maybe i’m not searching hard enough) but i think it’s important. eating healthy is excellent for your brain function & body function. it’s hard, especially in college, to have to motivation (or money) to make your own dinner, lunch & breakfast everyday. but. it’s. worth. it. i can’t stress this enough. i feel more awake and energized at school and workouts and your body has to have these nutrients to keep functioning well. 
  • Exercise. gross i know, please don’t hurt me, but exercise goes right with eating healthy. the better you feel about yourself, the better you will do in school. simple enough. you will have more motivation, energy, and happiness with a good diet and exercise. running daily and occasionally swimming gets me though the week, and while sometimes i don’t want to workout, i always feel good in the end. find something you like doing and stick to it. try to work out 3 times a week. after every workout, i am always motivated to study
  • UNDERSTAND THE MATERIAL. it’s so obvious, but so many people just memorize. while you have to memorize any new thing you learn in the beginning, there is a time when you must apply what you memorized. you must actually think about why this term/concept is what it is based on memorized facts. you must see the whole picture and how little things relate and why they do. last year i realized this and it worked wonders. for me, if i understood the big picture, i knew the facts by heart. it dawned on me that you must train the mind to think. when going through notes, quizzes, tests, and studying i always asked myself why is this important and what it relates to. retention. is. key. understanding, and not memorizing facts will help so so much!!
  • STUDY BUDDIES. i can’t stress enough how much this helped me. coming from a boarding school, it’s easy to work on homework with friends all the time. to review for a test, my friends in the class would all meet and discuss the material. i’m an auditory learner, so this worked 10x better. what i’ve learned is that if you can teach it, you know it. when i could explain concepts to my friends, i knew i didn’t have to study that. if questions came up when i was trying to discuss my line of thinking, i revisited my notes and tried to understand why i didn’t get it. if we had study guides, we would all do the question and discuss why we got our answers after. for me, discussion is the best way to get new perspectives and ideas as well as understanding the topic better. (i also love talking so).
  • ask questions. even if its stupid. even if you’re just curious. always ask them. 
  • study environment. outside (if it wasn’t terrible weather) is where i love to study with friends. if it is snowing or raining, i go to the library or a local coffee shop. it really just depends on my mood. find an area where you feel the most productive!

anonymous asked:

"crazy detention stories"...go

They’re really not that crazy I don’t think but fine- but as I had detention at least once a week for 3 years you’re only getting the highlights here:

  • So again, I only ever got detentions because I was late to school basically every day. Every single day, the office wrote me a late slip with my name spelled horrendously wrong. Different spelling every day. The most famous butchering was writing my name as “Millie Hoagie”. On my very last day of high school, I was predictably late, and they spelled my name perfectly correctly.
  • So listen my ‘reputation’ in school was basically “quiet good girl who’s never done anything wrong, ever, in her life” and “teacher’s pet” and the like. And despite the fact I was there every time all the ‘Bad Kids™’ who were also always in detention were always incredibly surprised to see me??? Like they never got over it. Every time I walked into the damn room at least half the class would be like “MOLLY YOU DON’T BELONG HERE YOU’RE INNOCENT!!” 😂
  • Also despite the fact I was basically invisible in the school as a whole all the trouble makers knew me by name because, and I quote a kid from my 10th grade Spanish class who was trying to hook up with me at the time here, “Guys like me are afraid of you, Girl, we’re just plain out scared that we gonna corrupt you!” and I still don’t know what he actually meant by that???
  • Bu anyway, this apparent rep usually gave me an upper hand with the teachers monitoring the detentions. Because, you know, some were fine, some were bitchy, some were insane. But all of them were pissed about the fact they had to be there instead of heading home.
  • The rules of detention were literally just ‘stare at the wall and don’t talk’, depending on which teacher they might let the students do homework. But since I was apparently a great person and always had the class’ incredulous response to me being in the room, they usually let me get away with sleeping or reading a book lol.
  • Of course…no one said any of the other kids were inclined to following the rules lmao. These were like, all the class clowns™ shoved into one room. Things always got real funny real fast.
  • It would always start off with the coughing game. If you’ve ever stepped into a school you should know what that is.
  • It would then escalate to everyone in the room playing catch whenever the teacher looked away for a brief moment
  • Detention was always in the health classroom so someone always tried to steal a limb off the skeleton without being to obvious
  • Some teachers would let people talk ‘quietly’ so jokes were fucking abound
  • One time I was minding my own damn business and a kid slides me a note saying ‘in like five minutes ask to go to the bathroom but head downstairs to the English wing’ before he snuck out without the teacher noticing. I get down there and he’s at one end of the hallway and another boy is at the other end. Upon seeing me, these boys run full speed down the hall at each other, leap up in the air when they get to the direct center, high five with full force, both scream in pain, and then hit the floor, clutching their hands. I was cracking the fuck up and trying to convince them to go to the nurse but they wouldn’t listen. I asked the guy why the hell they did that. He told me ‘because we wanted a witness and no one will ever believe you’ 😂😂
  • One time my sorta-neighbor Mike comes in and the teacher asked why he had detention and apparently, the principal had asked him where to find his friend Jose, and Mike responded “he’s out picking cotton” and the principal flipped out at what he perceived to be a racist joke and gave him a month detention. But the thing was, Jose was in an agriculture class and he was literally outside picking cotton that they had planted there earlier. Jose found it fucking hilarious and refused to tell the principal to get his friend out of trouble.
  • As I haven’t been inside a school building for quite some time now I don’t know if turtling is still a thing but it was…quite an epidemic for my senior class.
  • It’s when you turn someone’s backpack inside out right? But it was a full blown war with these kids. Trust no one. Never leave the room. Never look away. Holy shit. One of the best moments of this occurred in detention, when a boy reached to get a book out of his backpack to find it was gone. After 15 minutes of searching the room, he found it, turtled, hidden in a filing cabinet in the front of the room. Everyone, including the teacher, was loosing their shit, because how did someone pull that off so quietly and invisibly without someone noticing??? No one fessed up. The class was in fear of the turtle ninja for the rest of the month, but they never struck again. No one ever discovered who it was.
  • Guys: It was me.
  • One time it was raining and the teacher was in a bad mood so he insisted all the windows stay open. He left for a bathroom break or something and this one poor kid, who was now completely soaked as he was stuck with a window seat, just said “fucking bye” and just…climbed out the damn window. Left his backpack and everything. Didn’t see him again for at least a month.
  • There was one guy who always sold ice cream out of his bag when the teachers weren’t looking. Where he was getting it from and how it stayed frozen is beyond me.
  • Oh my God sometimes all the indie singer kids would just come and sit on the floor outside the classroom and talk loudly to annoy us??? The hell were they trying to accomplish??? Your singing ain’t special and you won’t be famous, please let us die in peace.
  • One kid had detention because when we were running laps in gym class he jumped up to hit the arch of the ceiling and accidentally set off the fire alarm. The teacher that day insisted on continuously referring to him as ‘the delinquent’, as if no one else in the room had broken the rules or something
  • One time one of the gym teachers was in charge of it and long story short he started doing the jersey turnpike. True horror.
  • One time the teacher got a call and she had to go down to the office and the second she was gone this one kid’s friend runs in with a huge tray going “Y’ALL I STOLE THE LASAGNE CUPCAKES FROM THE FOOD AND NUTRITION CLASSROOM” and we dined like kings.
  • Everyone would sometimes just break out in song for no God damn reason
  • One time one of the guys in charge of the detention was A) Not someone anyone recognized as a teacher and B) Potentially Stanley Tucci. Like…I was about 80% certain that this guy was Stanley Tucci.
  • He refused to confirm or deny or even give a name
  • One time I was really absorbed in my book when all the sudden a letter flew onto my desk, an anonymous sender that just said “You have a soft, sexy voice.” Neither of which is true, I’m pretty sure, and I could not for the life of me figure out who sent it omfg
  • One time a teacher was freaking out because he went to a psychic over the weekend and was told there was a lot of activity around him so I looked him straight in the eyes and told him I’m a medium and I can see that the devil had marked his soul and he threw me out of the room and refused to take that class for detention ever again😂
  • It was a hot summers day. The ceiling fans were on their highest setting. A boy nudges me, with a small carton of ice cream in his hands under his desk. “What do you think would happen if I scooped out a huge chunk of this and threw it at the fan?” he whispered. “Jamil, no.” I pleaded, but it fell on deaf ears. Soon, the room was filled with confused screams.
  • Apparently all the other regulars™ had bought me candy grams around Christmas time so they were confused when I showed up to detention with no candy and apparently the student council member sent them all to the other Molly in the grade because she was the popular one and this lead to about 12 boys grumbling for two and a half hours like “The one damn time I attempt to be a gentleman” and “I know where she lives” and “Gonna gingerbread her fucking locker” I could not stop laughing
  • Oh God okay one time the teacher we had was literally. Off the charts.
  • Like there’s the chill teachers, and then the bitchy teachers. And then this lady. She literally reminded me of Stubel
  • So I didn’t even know who she was but I walk in and do my shy smile/quiet ‘hello’ thing and take out my book so she immediately zeros in on me as ‘the good kid’ as usual
  • But she literally seemed to think every other person in this class was a hardened criminal holy shit. She was all over the place barking orders and yelling. And of course, you’ve got a room full of class clowns, like they feed off teachers like this. So the madder she got the more ridiculous they got. I was literally almost in tears trying to force myself not to laugh because I didn’t want to risk her turning on me omfg
  • So she yelled and flailed about the room and they kept going with jokes and paper wasps and lying about their names and just doing literally every thing they could possibly do so this woman wouldn’t have the chance to rest
  • This escalated with every minute and came to a resounding end when the teacher decided the Australian Kid™ was chewing gum and picked up the trashcan and shoved his face in it, screaming at him to spit it out as he yelled back “YOU’RE ONLY DOING THIS BECAUSE IM AN IMMIGRANT
  • he was in charge of all the bullshit that day and it was hysterical but he wasn’t the one chewing gum loudly that was me
  • The vp came in to see what all the yelling was about to find a teacher shoving a boy’s head in the trash, one boy shirtless as another drew tattoos on him, the phone off the line with it’s cord wrapped around a kid’s neck, two boys dueling with skeleton arms, one kid with her leg out the window, a kid tying a skeleton foot to the ceiling fan, rubber bands and paper wasps flying from every angle, three people turtling backpacks, someone brandishing an epi-pen, sexual hangman being played on the chalkboard, someone eating ice cream and fanning himself with money, and me, crying into my book with my hand literally bleeding from all my efforts to not laugh at what I was witnessing
  • We never saw her in detention again😂
  • My one younger friend got a detention for being late and was really shaken up about it and I tried to tell her she’d be fine but then she got caught sliding me chocolate animal crackers during it, and subsequently got another detention because of this; somehow I was not viewed as an equally guilty party and didn’t get in trouble
  • This one guy came in complaining “You guys all told me to get a twitter and I get thrown in twitter jail my first day!” “That’s like a thousand tweets in one day, how the fuck did you mange that?” “Bitch I had a lot to say about McDonalds!”
  • One teacher came in and was like “I don’t feel like helping with homework but does anyone wanna learn how to hack a computer?”
  • Someone got caught pouring water out the window but when the teacher looked to see why she saw the youngest of the goats™ standing under the window with it’s mouth open waiting for more
  • One time the teacher wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom and after I asked for like the 5th time he said “It can’t be that important!” so I just pulled a pad out of my backpack and silently sat it on my desk while glaring at him and this 40 year old man looked like he was about to pass out and he finally let me go
  • I remember our final detention of senior year we were told that if we skip it we can’t graduate so everyone went into that room with a ridiculously nostalgic attitude and one guy finally stole the skull off the skeleton and we fucking tossed it around the entire time while singing and blatantly ignoring the teacher’s complaining lmao
  • I know there’s more but it’s 7am and this is long so all in all like…I do not miss high school but some memories are bearable lmao
Adding to canon is not the same thing as destroying canon

At San Diego Comic Con, we learned that Sonequa Martin-Green’s character, Michael Burnham, is Sarek’s adoptive daughter. The second I heard the news, all I could think was, “Let the hate begin.” And boy, did it ever.

I understand the disappointment, particularly with fan fic writers who invested a lot of time and effort into crafting stories that fit neatly into canon. Amazing how one sound bite can bulldoze right through decades of widely accepted fanon, huh?

Keep reading

Canceled Date (Steve Harrington x Female Reader)

Summary: After you had to cancel your date with Steve because you have to babysit your sister, Steve invites himself over and manages to show you a completely different side to him.

Word Count: 2512

Warnings: none, maybe just OOC Steve

Note: First time writing for Steve but ay whatever. I hope you all enjoy! Feel free to tell me what ya think! :)

Originally posted by ilovenarcisse

It wasn’t every night your parents would leave you to take care of your 8 month old sister, but after your father got a promotion at his job, they wanted to celebrate. You really didn’t want to ruin their celebration, so you offered to take care of little Anna for as long as they needed you to.

The only bad part was that you had to cancel your date with your boyfriend. You were dating Steve Harrington, the “King” of the school. He had told he really didn’t care about that title, and it was a bit stupid. You have been dating for at least 3 months, and your parents absolutely adored him, and you like to think his parents adore you too.

Anyway, Steve had been a bit upset when you told him you had to cancel. You were both going to watch a movie at his house since you worked at the theater and didn’t want to be there any longer than you needed to.

“Come on (y/n), we’ve been planning this for a week,” Steve said over the phone, you sighed.

“I know, I know- maybe tomorrow I can come over,” you said, feeling bad. Steve was silent for a moment.

“I’ll let it slide this time, but you have to promise me that we’ll spend the whole day together.” You furrowed your eyebrows.

“The whole day?” you asked, you can see him nodding.

“Yup! To make up for all the other times you had to cancel!” You scoffed.

“I only canceled once before this!” you claimed, he hummed.

“All day tomorrow so clear your schedule, babe,” You were silent for a moment, before a smile grew on your lips.

“I’ll get to that…I’m really sorry, Steve,” you apologized again.

“It’s alright (y/n), what are you doing anyway, I didn’t even ask,”

“I have to watch Anna, my parents are going out to celebrate or something,” you shrugged, moving on your stomach, holding your phone against your ear.

“You have to babysit?” he asked, his voice changing suddenly, like he was excited. You nodded as if he could see you.

“Yeah- I’m not canceling on you for no reason,” you laughed, Steve laughed as well. Your heart sped up because you really loved hearing his laugh.

“You know what- our date is not being canceled, tell your parents I’ll be there in 10 minutes,” Your smile fell, and you tilted your head.

“What?”

“You heard me! I’ll be there in ten minutes,” You could just hear him get up, and grab his car keys. You sat up.

“Steve! My parents aren’t going to like it if my boyfriend comes over while they’re gone- they might think-”

“Come on- we’re going to babysit, that’s all! I’ll see you in ten minutes! Love you!” Your jaw dropped. Was he seriously going to come over?

“(y/n)?” his voice broke you out of your thoughts and you shook off.

“I love you too, but if my parents turn you away at the door- don’t blame me!” He laughed, and you did too, before the line went dead.

Keep reading

School can be exhausting so these are my ways of dealing with stress and I’m, obviously, not an expert, but it helped me.

Take a bath

Get a bath bomb, shave your legs, and just relax in the warm water

Get an adult coloring book

I can’t tell you how much getting a coloring book helped me with stress. When I have free time, or a free class, or I just feel like coloring, I get my coloring book and just start.

Draw / doodle

Have a sketchbook where you can draw little things, or even big things. Draw random stuff that comes to your mind to free your thoughts. If you are bad at drawing, don’t worry cause it’s your private thing and you don’t have to show this to anyone.

Paint 

Same as drawing but this time instead of just a pencil, use watercolors or ink or markers, whatever you want and have. Create a masterpiece and if you like it pin it on your wall to remind you that you can do great things!

Do some origami

You have a ton of YouTube videos of how to do some basic origami. Fold your paper and enjoy your finished work.

Stretch 

After a study session, stretch from head to toe. You will feel better because blood will easily come to your brain and you won’t have any back pain for sitting too long.

Exercise

Every day, at morning or at night (or both if you are available) do some exercises for 20-30 minutes. If you are not that into exercising, you could dance with some up-beat music like nobody is watching.

Go for a quick run or ride a bike for 5 minutes

It will boost your energy and you will go outside and see the actual sun, or even clouds. Fresh air is really important for your health, so are little things that boost your energy. 

Listen to music

Maybe you are listening to music while studying, but listening to music while doing nothing else is also great. On the ride on the bus/train or whatever you’re taking, get some headphones and jam to your favourite music.

Take a nap

You come from school exhausted and you know you need to study, but it’s really hard for you to focus, just take a nap. Or if you are studying for 3-4 hours straight for that test tomorrow or writing a extra long essay - take a nap. 15-20 minutes is enough.

Get a diary or journal and write it down

Recently I started again writing into a diary (I haven’t done that since I was 12-13) and I can’t tell you how much better I feel after writing my thoughts down on paper. For me, writing with a pen/pencil instead of typing had me more focused on actually freeing my thoughts, but if you want to type you can. Also, it is funny to read some of your daily entries after a couple of years.

Meditate

Lay on your back, or sit on a comfortable chair, close your eyes and just breathe. Try not to think of your work, or problems and just breathe. If you are religious, you can also pray.

Clean your room

Clear room = clear mind. Having a nice and tidy room helps me more to focus and not to think of the mess surrounding me. Also, cleaning can be calming and stress relieving, if you focus on cleaning instead of your thoughts.

Drink a glass of water

You will be more hydrated and feel much better. So just drink your water.

Eat a fruit

It’s healthy and sweet, what else is there to say about?

I hope some of those help you. Keep in mind that you, obviously, don’t have to everything everyday. Doing a few of these will really be beneficial for your mental health and your body.

Sending much love to you all, V. ❤

anonymous asked:

I wish you would write an outsider POV Sterek, maybe from their neighbor's POV?

This is embarrassing.

Holy, fuckmuffins, this is embarrassing. She should not do this. She should turn around and go back home. She should just be at home. Forever. She can order groceries from Amazon and socialize with people over the internet and she thinks she could be very happy to just live at home. It would be fun. 

Also, she would be alive. Because she is not sure she will be after all is said and done. 

She gets to their door and then seriously considers just turning around. It would make her a fundamentally bad person but she could be okay with that. 

Ugh.

No she can’t.

She takes a deep breath, wishes that Jenny wasn’t at her father’s this weekend because maybe a cute little four year old would help, and then knocks anyway. On her next door neighbor’s door. 

It had to be her next dooor neighbor. Someone who she will probably have to see again. 

And, of course, Murder Man opens it. He is already glaring at her.

He is going to kill her

“Hello?” he asks and she realizes she has just been standing there. Staring. Which, like fair, he is gorgeous but mostly she’s staring because it is just now occurring to her that she should have told someone where she is going before just coming over to share this bad news. 

“H-hi,” she says finally. “My name is Tammy and I live in number 406–right next door actually and I-I’m so sorry but I’ve just… I’ve just scratched your car.”

Keep reading

OKAY KIDS LEMME SIT YOU TF DOWN AND TELL YOU ABOUT DAMIEN FRICKIN BLOODMARCH

(SPOILERS!!!!!!!! IF YOU HAVE NOT PLAYED HIS ROUTE AND DON’T WANNA BE SPOILED DO NOT READ)

OKAY, FIRST OF ALL 

DAT HAIR, DAT MAKEUP, DAT SWEET OUTFIT 

MY ACNE IS CURED, MY GRADES HAVE GONE UP, LIFE IS A DAMN DREAM AND IT’S ALL BECAUSE OF THIS GOTH PRINCE

HE’S V. PASSIONATE ABOUT EVERYTHING, LIKE ONE OF THE MOST ATTRACTIVE THINGS IN THE WORLD IS WHEN SOMEONE IS PASSIONATE ABOUT WHAT THEY LOVE AND HIS HEART IS FULL OF LOVE AND WONDER LET ME TELL YOU

This dude renovated his whole house by himself. 

HIS HOUSE IS SO BEAUTIFUL I  ACTUALLY HAD THE AUDACITY TO FEEL SLIGHTLY JEALOUS OF THIS FALLEN ANGEL

I WANTED TO STEAL HIS HOUSE FROM HIM

DID I MENTION THAT HE HAS NARUTO FANFIC IN HIS VICTORIAN LIBRARY? 

NARUTO X SASUKE SMUT NO LESS

TRULY A MAN OF TASTE

And this dude has A+++++++ parenting AND gardening skills. 

He is an expert on everything Victorian, including the language of flowers and arranging bouquets and writing beautiful letters. 

INSTEAD OF SENDING YOU A MESSAGE ON DADBOOK LIKE SOME PEASANT, HE WRITES YOU GORGEOUS HEARTFELT LETTERS IN FINE CALLIGRAPHY SEALED WITH HIS OWN SIGIL

HE OFFERS TO GIVE YOU A PERSONALIZED BOUQUET WITH YOUR FAVORITE FLOWER ON YOUR FIRST HANGOUT

GIVES YOU HIS HANDKERCHIEF LIKE SOME VAMPIRIC KNIGHT OF OLD

THIS DUDE IS EXTRA AF WITH EVERYTHING HE DOES AND I AM 10000% FOR IT, YES THAT’S SOME GOOOOOOOOOOOOD SHIT, SIGN ME UP

But he also has a sweet and joking side. Despite his Gothic persona, he is actually really scared by horror movies. He takes you out for a date in a graveyard and somehow makes it comforting, enchanting even. He’s always making jokes about things the Victorians COULD have done. 

Damien manages to handle his rebellious teen JUST FINE without making his son feel like he’s being patronized or controlled. He is diplomatic, calm, and loving. He’s a cool dad. 

AND WHEN YOU FINALLY GO ON YOUR THIRD DATE, OH YES YOU ARE IN FOR A SURPRISE. 

DAMIEN BLOODMARCH, MR. BEAUTIFUL PRINCE OF DARKNESS, IS ACTUALLY AN IT GUY WHO VOLUNTEERS AT AN ANIMAL SHELTER IN HIS OFF TIME. 

AND. HE. LOVES. DOGS. 

BLESSED IMAGE, REBLOG FOR GOOD FORTUNE

IF YOU WEREN’T SOLD ON HIM ALREADY, OOOOOOOOOO BABY, OOOOOOOOOO YES THIS IS THE KICKER RIGHT HERE

GOD WHAT AN ADORABLE DORK

IT TURNS OUT HE WAS ACTUALLY SCARED THAT YOU WOULDN’T LIKE THE FACT THAT HE’S NOT JUST A GOTH 24/7. THAT HE’S ACTUALLY A THREE DIMENSIONAL PERSON

AND THE REASON WHY HE DOESN’T FEAR DEATH IS BECAUSE HE BELIEVES THAT IT GIVES LIFE MEANING, THAT YOU SHOULDN’T LET GRIEF CONTROL YOU FOREVER

HERE IS A WONDERFUL, GORGEOUS PARENT WITH UNIQUE INTERESTS AND HE IS JUST FULL OF SO MANY SWEET THOUGHTS AND IDEAS AAGHHGHGHGH

Damien has lost people dear to him. Yet he keeps moving. He keeps finding ways to make his life interesting and beautiful. He is good with animals and kids, everyone really (except the cashier at Hot Topic). He has not let life make him bitter. I love that about his character. I think his connection with the Player Dad is really special because people judge him so quickly and the Player Dad helps show him that he’s more than just an archetype and he can be his own person. The pressure to be only a small part of himself 100% of the time was making it hard for him to enjoy his hobbies, or to feel free. And I relate to that, I really do. We all have something people expect us to be. 

And don’t even get me started on the GRADUATION PARTY

DAMIEN’S SON THANKS YOU FOR MAKING HIS DAD HAPPY

AND DAMIEN SHOWS UP IN HIS IT GUY CLOTHES 

HE HAS FINALLY ACCEPTED HIMSELF AND GAINED CONFIDENCE AND IT FEELS AMAZING

And then there is this

I have nothing to say. 

I think I almost cried when i SAW THIS GIFT FROM THE GODS

MMMMMMMMMM YESSSSSSSSSS THIS IS THE PUREST CINNAMON ROLL, 70% SUGAR, 20% GOTH, 10% BAD JOKES

I FEEL LIKE I HAVE BEEN CLEANSED AFTER PLAYING HIS ROUTE 

AND THIS IS MY INADEQUATE ESTIMATION OF DAMIEN MOTHERTRUCKING BLOODMARCH, MAY HE REIGN AS THE BEAUTIFUL DORK KING OF DARKNESS FOREVER

some things people need to get straight

Don’t buy puppies from pet stores to “save the puppies from being mistreated!!” While this is done with the best of intentions, the puppy mill problem isn’t really about the puppies- the actual puppies are usually treated okay, it’s the parents that are kept in horrible conditions and forced to breed until they die. While you may be giving a home to one dog if you buy from a pet store, you’re supporting the misery of hundreds of other dogs with your money.

USDA certification isn’t a sign of a reputable breeder. It’s actually the mark of a puppy mill and if you see this, run fast in the opposite direction. CKC registration (Continental Kennel Club, not Canadian) is also a huge red flag.

But having AKC registered puppies doesn’t mean they’re reputable, either. While most good breeders (in the US) will have AKC registration, AKC isn’t picky about which dogs they register, so plenty of bad breeders do too. Also, “champion bloodlines” means nothing unless they’re at least in the second or third generations of a pedigree. 

Stereotyping breeds is not “like racism for dogs”. Humans weren’t strategically bred for hundreds of years to develop traits to assist them in specific tasks. Dogs were, so retrievers retrieve, greyhounds run, shepherds herd, and terriers fight. It’s not “all in how you raise them”. Genetics. They do stuff. Science. And hey could we maybe not compare the systemic oppression of minorities to people saying chihuahuas are barky? Thanks

Designer breeds i.e. labradoodles, maltipoos, cavachons etc. are not “the best of both worlds!” Again, genetics…that’s not how they work. Also realize that most of these dogs (especially since they are common products of puppy mills) don’t come from well-bred parents because reputable breeders generally don’t allow their dogs to be used to breed crosses. Like I’ve seen poodle breeders literally write it in their puppy contracts that they will take back the dog if they find out it’s being used to create “doodles”. 

If you support importing foreign rescue dogs but use the “overpopulation of shelter dogs in the US” factoid to protest dog breeding you’re a fucking hypocrite.

Don’t tell people “you can find any breed in a shelter!” Like ??? Yeah lemme just go find Cesky Terrier at my local humane society! I genuinely have no idea why people say this when it’s obviously not true?

Puppies aren’t a blank slate, and adult dogs don’t all come with awful baggage. If a puppy is genetically predisposed to aggression, all the early socialization in the world might not help at all. And while any adult dog will be shaped by its past, not all rescue dogs are abused and many are there because of circumstances completely unrelated to them and have had perfectly normal lives. You also have the advantage of already knowing their temperament, energy level, and any behavioral issues. 

CASTIEL AND HIS SACRED OATH - 12x10, 12x12, 12x23

This scene here. This split second glance is so so important. I don’t know why people aren’t talking about it (I couldn’t even find any gifs of it and had to take pictures coz I’m computerly incompitent). But I wanted to give my own analytical response to this millisecond glance, because I think it demonstrates properly why Cas has never done anything about his feelings for Dean. 

First, some context from my behalf: I always assumed Cas had never admitted his love for Dean for one of two reasons, 1) he was an angel, therefore not quite understanding his feelings himself - perhaps confusing them with familial love, Dean style. Or 2) he was afraid his love may not be reciprocated. But after watching 12x10, 12x12 and 12x23, I can thoroughly rule out reason 1. 

Now, I’ll be talking a lot about 12x10 as that ENTIRE EPISODE and THIS LOOK are so closely correlated. 

Keep reading

What I Learned From University

FIRST YEAR

  • Everyone is super friendly, especially in the first few weeks → Introduce yourself to the people sitting near you for the first few weeks of lectures. Everyone is looking for a friend or at least someone to talk to!!
  • If you commute, make that time productive → My bus ride was an hour there and back each day. It sucks but I would try to be productive for at least half of the commute. I have a post about being productive on public transport here.
  • On that note, stay on campus as long as possible each day → As soon as I got back home I would procrastinate every little thing. Stay in an already productive environment for as long as possible.
  • Maybe don’t buy your textbooks used → I thought I was being smart by buying used textbooks (most schools will have a buy and sell facebook page for textbooks). I ended up having to pay for access codes in order to do my online homework – access codes that cost ~$70 separately and came included with new textbooks anyways. Email your prof or talk to someone who has recently taken the class to find out if you need an access code. If you do, your best bet is to buy a new version of the textbook (unless you can get a seriously cheap used textbook).
  • Print off your timetable and find all of your classes before the first day → This helped me so much! I found exactly where all my classes were before the first day of class. I wrote down little tricks to help me remember where everything was (i.e. my calc lecture is in the arts and science building which is also where the only subway on campus is).
  • Don’t knock living at home to save money → If you’re lucky enough to have a college or university close to home at least consider living at home. Getting your own place or living in dorms is expensive. (But if you have to find off campus housing on your own, don’t leave it too late or you might not find a place)
  • Figure out the best way to take notes for each class → You have to customize the way you study for each class, all depending on the prof and the content. I hand-wrote notes for some classes (chem, calc, and physics), but not others (psych and bio). If you’re writing by hand you can always just annotate your textbook notes or lecture slides (if they’re posted before class). If you fall behind while taking notes, just leave a gap and check out a friend’s notes after class.
  • Adjust your expectations → Don’t expect to get straight A’s, like you might have in high school. You can strive for straight A’s but be realistic as time goes on. For classes I struggled with, I expected to be near the class average. If I was a lot lower than the class average then I would know to invest more time.
  • Make time for physical activity → If we’re being honest I hardly exercised during uni. Go for at least a half hour walk each day and try to start a physical activity routine. Get a friend and join a sports team, go to a fitness class, or commit to some form of a daily workout with them! You’ll feel bad bailing on someone else, plus working out is more fun with other people.
  • Review content throughout the semester → Reviewing little bits of content will save you a massive content review right before finals! Look through old notes while you wait for your daily coffee or take 15 minutes to watch some khan academy videos on stuff you learned in the first month of classes.
  • Think seriously about how much you can handle → Don’t take on too many responsibilities at once and consider all of your options! I worked weekends and some week nights throughout the school year. Looking back I should have worked less because my stress levels were way too high. Also, quite a few people I talked to took 4 classes instead of 5, for their first semester of university. I don’t think I would have done it, in the end, but it’s always something to consider.
  • Have fun but be responsible at parties → Always go to parties with people you trust!! If you didn’t do much partying/drinking during high school (like me), remember to pace yourself when drinking! Eat before you go out and have some water between each drink, till you find your limit. Don’t let yourself be peer-pressured into anything but also don’t be afraid to have fun! And check out if your uni has a safe walk program (someone will come and walk you back to your dorm or your car if you feel unsafe or nervous for any reason)
  • When procrastination hits, aim to be productive in some way → The only reason my biology mark was so high was because I would study biology whenever I got sick of studying for physics and calculus. If you know you need to study but just can’t do it, start by being productive in some other way – study a subject you do like, do your laundry, organize your study area, etc. Get your brain to start thinking productively.
  • Labs are difficult so be prepared → I had so many labs first year. Some tips: eat and hydrate before labs, never assume you can finish your prelab last minute, be nice to your lab partner, always remember lab safety (don’t be the person trying to wear shorts in the lab, TAs will not hesitate to kick you out), don’t rush through an experiment but be efficient, and ask for help (even if you feel like you’re bothering your TA).
  • Please go to bed early. Sleep affects everything → I was so dumb and would never go to bed early even though I had to be up at 6 am almost every day to catch the bus. Lack of sleep will catch up to you eventually!! Also, all nighters are not necessary, unless you make them necessary. I prioritized and never had to stay awake too late. And never pull an all nighter the night before an exam (you’re better off getting sleep and resting your brain).
  • Bring a water bottle everywhere → Buy a decent water bottle and always carry it with you. Even though my uni is small there are still tons of spots around campus where I can refill my water bottle!! Stay hydrated my friends!
  • A practice problem a day keeps the F away → This saying probably works best for science classes, but I guess a reading a day will get you somewhere too. Do something for every class each day, even if it’s just a practice problem or a quick reading. Develop a routine!
  • You’ll have lots of midterms → I was under the impression that midterms happened just once a semester (I thought I would have one week where I had a midterm for each class). That was not my reality. I had 2 or 3 midterms for each of my classes scattered throughout the semester. Study really hard for your first set of midterms till you get used to the high expectations!
  • Don’t worry about what other people are doing or thinking → This is mostly in regards to social media. I was bummed when I looked back on my first year of university, because I felt like I hadn’t done anything fun compared to other people. You only see the image that other people want you to see. You don’t know how hard someone worked or how hard they didn’t work. Just focus on you and how you can affect positive results in your life.
  • Other people literally don’t care about your appearance → My friend’s little sister visited campus and asked us “Why is everyone wearing sweatpants?” People literally don’t care. Dress nice and put lots of makeup on one day, because you feel like it, and wear sweats the next day.
  • Start essays and reports as soon as possible → You never know what might come up so be prepared for the worst! Outline your essay or graph your data as soon as you can.
  • Eat healthy and do meal prep → You can eat healthy during university! Set aside a couple of nights each week to do meal prep. Cook food in bulk to save money and don’t eat out too much. Try to have at least 1 serving of fruits or veggies with each meal or snack you eat!
  • Find a good study spot on campus → Explore your campus and figure out your favourite places to study. I had a couple of spots where I would always meet my friends to study and quiet spots where no one would bother me. Studying outside or in an area with natural light is always good.
  • Don’t be afraid to talk to your profs and TAs → This is the number one thing I’m going to try to do more of in my second year. TAs are chill to talk to and they can tell you tons of useful information on what upper year classes are like, which professors are good, why they chose to go to grad school, etc. If you’re struggling in lectures or labs, talk to your prof or TA! Make an appointment and be sure you can tell them exactly which concepts you’re struggling with or at least where you got lost. One of my profs told us he just waits hopefully during office hours for someone to come in. (Also profs love it if you ask them about their research or any topics they seem passionate about during lectures.)
  • Explore all the resources your university has to offer → My university has a program that is basically people bringing their dogs around for students to pet, in order to relieve stress. It actually works and gave me something to look forward to! Just be aware of your options so that if something in your life changes you know where you can go to ask for help.
  • Get a planner and utilize it → There’s no excuse not to have a planner of some sort. Use your phone, get a bullet journal, or buy a cheap planner. Have somewhere where you can record important deadlines and make to do lists. I also recommend back planning all of your studying at the beginning of the semester. Write down your midterms and finals dates and write down how much you’re going to study each day leading up to the exam. This way you’ll be able to look ahead at each month and figure out what needs to be done (i.e. getting an essay done early because the due date falls during a busy week of midterms)

This post ended up being a lot longer than I expected whoops. Take the things I said into consideration but remember that everyone’s experience will be different. Good luck to everyone heading to university!


My Other Posts:

37 Mistakes I Made As A New Tarot Reader

I’d be lying if I said that I woke up one day and just knew all that there was to know about Tarot. During my journey as a new Tarot reader, I made a lot of “mistakes” and some fails. I’m putting mistakes in quotation marks because if it weren’t for these things I probably wouldn’t be the Tarot reader that I am today. I like to think that each one of these “mistakes” helped me gain a better insight into the type of reader I am. Along the way, I learned that my journey is mine and mine alone and no matter how authoritative the source of advice provided by someone else, I must ultimately do what feels right to me. I am not a perfect Tarot reader or learner by any means, and I believe this post shows a clear example of that.

Following The Rules

In the beginning, I read so many books and talked to many different readers who each had their own idea of the “right way” to read Tarot. I also had a huge fear that I was somehow using my deck the wrong way. I wish I would have known that there is no right or wrong way to read Tarot. What may work for one person may not work for the other and vice versa. I think that the amazing thing about divination is that each reader brings a little special part of themselves and their unique flavor to Tarot and that is incredible. I wish I would have been a more informed learner and allowed myself to form my own opinions instead of trying to follow someone else’s. No two readers are ever alike and they do not need to be either.

Meaning And Memorization Overload

I tried to learn and memorize all the Tarot card meanings overnight. While this may help some readers learn, I was not one of them. I quickly became frustrated and discouraged and it made learning Tarot into a chore. I set unrealistic goals for myself and I had such a difficult few months. I wish I would have taken my time to enjoy the experience of bonding with my cards and allowing the process of learning Tarot to develop and grow with me organically instead of trying to force it.

Lack Of Learning Plan

As I mentioned above, trying to memorize all the cards didn’t work for me. I was all over the place with my Tarot learning. I had several books all with competing ideas. Now when I go forward to learn a new aspect of Tarot I have a learning plan. It is something I wish I had done when I first started my Tarot journey as it would have kept me organized and left me with the ability to track my progress.

The Self Doubt Monster

I started off my Tarot journey excited and open to the possibility of growing as a person and learning about my life. As I mentioned above, I started feeling like I wasn’t good enough or that I would never truly grasp learning the cards. I had a lot of self-doubts and it led me to be depressed because Tarot was my first outlet of expression for me and I felt like I was bad at it. I wish I would have known that learning anything, especially Tarot takes time. I now know that my learning with Tarot will be a life long experience and I am okay with taking it one step at a time.

Do The Shuffle

One of my Tarot mentors told me that I had to shuffle my deck overhand four times, riffle shuffle three and cut the deck with my left hand three times so that my deck could be fully charged before a reading. It never really resonated with me but I still did it because I was told that was the way to do it. I wish I would have shuffled however and how many times I felt energetically pulled to do so. I now just riffle shuffle until I feel called to stop. Nothing fancy but it works.

Bonding

I never really resonated with sleeping with my Tarot deck but it seemed like that was what I was constantly being told to do when I started learning Tarot. I did it for a few night and felt like a failure because it just didn’t feel right. I wish I would have known that I could just talk to my deck, write poetry with it and even read for some of my favorite book characters as a way to bond with it. I wish I would have known that bonding is a personal practice and there is no one size fits all.

My Inner Skeptic

My uncles are very religious and when I started reading Tarot they made lots of negative comments that I was stupid for believing in a deck of cards. This negatively affected how I saw divination for a few months and led me to be skeptical of my findings no matter how helpful they were. I wish I would have kept an equal level of skepticism and belief when learning Tarot before others tried to discredit them.

Rituals And Sacred Spaces Oh My

I thought that in order to give the best possible readings to myself or to someone else I needed to perform an elaborate ritual before the reading started and after the reading ended. I also thought I needed a beautifully adorned space with lots of crystals, incense, and candles. It’s funny because I now read in places like coffee shops and bars and I do not really incorporate any set rituals into my practice because I don’t feel like I need to. I wish I would have just focused on the basics and then experimented with creating my own rituals if I felt called to do so instead of feeling like I needed to.

Readings On Repeat

Something that I would do early on was read for a single situation over and over again. I wanted to know all aspect of that particular subject but by pulling various cards. By doing that, the information either didn’t make sense anymore or it became extremely watered down. I wish I would have taken the time to read about one situation straight through and then come back at a later date and ask again if I still wanted more information.

Emotional Readings

I was told early on that I shouldn’t read Tarot when I was sad or depressed. One day I did just that and it helped me more than I knew it would. I wish I would have started to use Tarot more when I had a depression episode to help calm me down and aid me in my healing journey rather than putting my cards away when I needed them the most.

Fancy Schmancy Tools

I thought I needed a fancy silk scarf to wrap my cards in, an elaborate wooden box and expensive incense to purify my cards. Looking back now I want to slap myself. I wish I would have known that those things are all unnecessary in my practice and are just extras not must have’s. I now keep my decks in their original boxes or pencil cases which are both functional and cost effective.

Tarot System Overload

I thought that in order to be a true Tarot reader, whatever that means, I had to learn all the different systems. Imagine me, not fully able to comprehend one deck yet still trying to learn Thoth, Marseille, and Rider Waite Smith all at the same time. Needless to say, it was a disaster. Although I would have still explored the different systems, I would have chosen one to start with exclusively and get to know well before delving deep into another. This would have helped me to achieve a better handle on my Tarot learning.

Mirroring Other Readings

I really looked up to the way my mother and grandmothers read cards that I wanted to mirror how they read. I felt by doing so, I was honoring our family traditions. I quickly found that their style just wasn’t for me. I wish I would have just trusted that my own way of reading Tarot would develop over time instead of trying to mirror theirs.

The Waiting Game

Something that I think held me back was my decision to wait before reading for other people that weren’t my immediate family and friends. I had this mindset that I needed to be studying Tarot for so many years or be a resident reader at a metaphysical shop to be able to read Tarot for other people. I wish I would have allowed myself to take the chance earlier and start reading for strangers. I think this would have helped me become more comfortable in my reading ability and also provide me with the feedback I needed to become better. When I did finally take that plunge and start reading for others, it became the best decision I could have possibly made.

Tarot Certification

When I started learning Tarot, a few of my mentors and people I looked up to talked about Tarot certifications and that every reader should aspire to be “Tarot certified” whatever that meant. I wanted to become certified not because I wanted to learn but because I felt it was what everyone else was doing. I thought having a shiny certificate with my name on it was fancy and somehow would prove that I was an amazing Tarot reader. Looking back now, I am glad I never went through with a certification. It isn’t that I do not think it is valuable because for some readers it may very well be but for me personally it never resonated with me and me wanting it back then was for all the wrong reasons. I wish I would have known that I could still be a great Tarot reader with or without a certificate.

Oracle Deck Allowance

At the beginning of my Tarot journey, I never gave myself a chance to use Oracle cards. I think using oracle cards alongside Tarot readings adds such a fabulous new dimension and layer to an already insightful message. If I could go back, I would give myself permission to enjoy oracle cards as well.

Defining Myself

When I started my Tarot journey I allowed other people’s opinions and judgments to define me as a reader and how I viewed and utilized my Tarot cards. For some reason, I wanted other Tarot readers approval but that wasn’t me at all. I wish that I would have silenced all those things and just remained authentic to myself. The many opinions others had of me influenced how I read the cards and that is something I still am actively letting go of today.

Burning Out

When I started out with Tarot, I tried to learn as much as I could. I did Tarot reading after reading for myself and even offered some practice readings on free forums. Long story short, I ended up burning myself out. I wish I would have given myself the time to take a break from Tarot and allow my mind to process the information instead of tiring myself out.

The Comparison Game

When starting on my Tarot journey, I used to compare myself to other Tarot readers. Comparing yourself to other people is never a good feeling and I wish I could go back and focus on the skills and good qualities that I had as a reader instead of those that others had, that I lacked.

Being A Solo Reader

At the beginning of my Tarot journey, I didn’t really have a lot of friends. This wasn’t by choice as there weren’t lots of local metaphysical shops as there are now but I wish I tried harder to find people who were of a like mind. I connected with a lot of my Tarot peers through online forums like tarotforum.net and it helped me shape who I was as a reader. I didn’t stick with it though and continued most of my study solo.  The accessibility of social media that we have today is something that I do not take for granted because back then, connecting with other Tarot readers was so difficult, especially if you were a beginner.

Those Darn Book Meanings

When I would start reading for myself with the cards I heavily relied on the book meanings. I would go through either the little white book or one of my many Tarot books I had from the library and try to decipher the message. I wish I would have learned to trust my own intuition and create my own meanings of the cards.

Fear Of Being Wrong

When I first started reading for others I had this huge anxiety of steering people in the wrong direction when using the cards. I wish I would have been honest with myself and my reading style and instead of trying to focus on concrete predictions, I would have made the client feel empowered and provided choices and avenues they could consider so that they could ultimately make the choices instead of me trying to make the choices for them.

Meaning Fluidity

When I started learning the meanings of the cards I was rigid in how I interpreted them. I thought The Fool always meant new beginnings and Death was a drastic change no matter where it was in a Tarot spread. I wish I would have known that each Tarot card has a myriad of meanings and that one card can mean something completely different in the context of one reading versus another.  

Recording My First Readings

When I started out in my Tarot journey I did lots of readings for myself, my favorite book and television characters. I wish I would have written down or recorded my first readings so that I could now be able to see how much I have grown as a reader.

All Work, No Play

I took my Tarot study very seriously that I never allowed myself any time to just enjoy the process. I wish I would have given myself permission to experiment, have fun and be silly with my cards as I am now.

The Celtic Cross

I know, I know. There are some readers who swear by the Celtic cross as a great beginner Tarot spread. I, however, am not one of them. The Celtic cross was so intimidating to me when I first started out. There are ten spread positions and as a beginner, I felt like that was the only true spread I could use. I wish I would have stuck with pulling one to three cards to become more comfortable with reading before I jumped into a large spread like the Celtic Cross.

Cleansing The Deck

As a beginner Tarot reader, I thought I needed to cleanse my deck every time I gave someone else a reading because it is what so many other people told me was the “right” thing to do. I don’t ever cleanse my decks anymore. I mean okay that is a lie… I’ve cleansed one deck, in the last year because that deck was being a total buttface but other than that I don’t feel like I need to. I wish I would have known that how many times I cleansed my deck was personal to me and doing so should be my choice and how I felt instead of following other people and their way of doing things.

Living The Daily Tarot Life

After I consumed myself with Tarot for the first year I put it away and I quickly forgot everything I learned. I wish I would have incorporated Tarot into my daily life like I do now. Something as easy as pulling a card of the day for myself would have helped me still keep Tarot in the forefront without taking lots of time and energy.

Wrong First Deck

I felt like I had to read with the Rider Waite Smith, Thoth or Marseille because that is what the majority of what other readers were using. I wish I would have allowed myself the permission to choose my own deck based on what I liked and what felt right instead of succumbing to what I felt I needed to start with.

Those Darn Scary Cards

I admit, when I started learning Tarot I dreaded pulling the Death card, the Tower or even The Devil cards. They scared the crap out of me. I wish I would have known that each card within the Tarot has both a shadow and illuminated aspect and that there aren’t inherently “bad” cards within the deck. Knowing this early on would have helped me see that there can be empowerment in the tower and sadness in the sun card.

Reading Boundaries

One of the biggest mistakes I made when starting reading for others was to not set clear boundaries of the types of readings I was comfortable doing and the ones I wanted to stay clear from. I learned quickly to be upfront with anyone who wanted a reading from me about what type of reader I was, what type of questions I do not answer and what my ethics were. During my first year of reading for others, I did a lot of free practice readings. I made it a habit to let those know that I was still learning and that the reading provided was to help me grow as a reader while giving them insight but for them to take it with a grain of salt.

Fear Of Success

Once I was comfortable using Tarot to help myself and others, I began to somehow fear and sometimes even sabotaged my own successes. I doubted if what I was doing was even real and if I was indeed helping others, despite the glowing reviews and acknowledgments from others. I wish that I would have taken the time to sit with myself and understand my feelings of success and why it scared me so much.

Saying No No No

Once I started opening up to read for other people, my close friends and family members started asking for readings on an everyday basis. It got to the point that people only wanted to hang out with me so that I could read their cards. I wish I would have been firm and said no to my family and friends who abused my kindness and generosity while I was still learning.

Feedback And Criticism

I wish I would have known the difference between someone bullying me and giving constructive criticism. While I did face times where people discouraged, bullied and belittle me, I wish I would have taken the advice from those who provided constructive criticism and genuinely wanted to better me as a reader instead of seeing it as a personal attack.

Life Answers

During my first few tries with Tarot, I thought the cards held all the answers to my problems and would be able to tell me what to do with complete clarity. I learned rather quickly that Tarot was a guide and it was my choices and the commitment to those choices that made up my life. I wish I would have known to not rely on Tarot as an all-knowing oracle and instead use it as a tool for guidance in regards to me making my own decisions within my life.  

Using The Wrong Spread

When I wanted to expand my Tarot arsenal, I tried many different Tarot spreads. Because of the sheer amount of spreads I used to read for myself, it proved very difficult in keeping track of what Tarot spreads worked for me and what didn’t.  I wish I would have tested out spreads more thoroughly before using them to give myself readings instead of just assuming that it was going to answer my question perfectly. I also wish that I was selective in what spreads I used for certain question and had the courage to tweak them to fit my specific situation. I learned quickly that there are some spreads created for one specific purpose that may not necessarily work for another purpose and can give confusing results.

Wrong Questions

Throughout my early years of Tarot, I would sometimes dance around the issue I wanted to know about when performing a reading for myself. In the same respect, I would often ask questions that were disempowering to me and lead to me feeling anxiety with the question I was seeking insight for. I wish I would have taken the time to really focus my questions before starting a reading. I now know the importance of doing a reading that empowers and uplifts instead of leaving me to feel hopeless and defeated no matter what the answer is.


Post Notes:
Please do not remove the captions.
Title: Thirty-Seven Mistakes I Made As A New Tarot Reader
Copyright:  © Ivan Ambrose 2017
Disclaimer: I use the term mistake very loosely in this post as I am a firm believer that each one of my mistakes has helped shape me into the reader that I am today. What I may consider a mistake in my practice and as a Tarot reader may be something that is totally acceptable in your practice. Just because I viewed something as a mistake in my personal practice does not mean that that particular topic should not hold or cannot hold a place of validity and acceptance in yours. The premise of this post is to showcase some of the mistakes I believed I have made as a new Tarot reader. This may be different from your own and that is okay. This post in no way, shape, or form is intended to tell you how you must go about being a new Tarot reader but as a reflection of myself as someone who was once a new Tarot reader. The intention of this post is to share my experiences and my growth as a Tarot reader.  I encourage and open up this conversation to respectful debate and added commentary to supplement this post of any kind.
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Baseball (M)

(I can’t get over baseball Jungkook so I had to write something)

╳ Pairing: Jungkook x Reader 

╳ Genre: smut | One shot

╳ Summary: You hated being dragged to baseball games because your best friends boyfriend was on the team. But maybe this time wasn’t going to be so bad.


“You know I hate baseball” You said, your arm being dragged as your friend pulled you across your lawn.

“Yes, and basically any sport” Your friend Rylee said, unlocking her car door. “But today is his big game and I really want you to come along!”

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It seems lately that, more often than not, any fic I open with even the teeniest bit of kink spends about half the fic being excruciatingly boring and samey about making sure everyone is on the same page when it comes to consent and who is spanking who in bed. As an Actual Real Live Kinky Person, let me tell you about some things that are seriously pissing me off.

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Anonymous asked: “Any advice for the crippling self-doubt with writing? I do short stories and I never think they’re good enough.”

Get ready for probably one of the worst pep-talks ever written. The first time I heard someone say (and not to me actually), “No one asked you to be a writer,” was probably the first time I realized I didn’t actually have to write. 

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