also its a buck because starbuck

“Turn your scars into Starbucks.”
- Robert H. Schuller

This Starbucks has a black logo, instead of their usual iconic-green†, so the first question I asked the barista was naturally: “Why?!”

She said it’s because they’re a concept store, and when I asked her what The Concept was, she, unable to answer, turned to two other coworkers who both also kind of stuttered and shrugged. She then pointed me to the “bird nest chandeliers” and the weird book-page-wallpaper as examples. There’s also a table outside under a canopy, near some ferns, I think to emulate a rainforest.

Apparently it had been a rocky unprofitable relationship with the now-forgotten concept, because people come to Starbucks because they want the familiar, not the conceptual. And thus only the black logo remains, a reminder of their shameful divergence.

Speaking of the familiar, just to test the boundaries of things, I brought a Subway Sandwich into this Concept. Like I suspected, no one said a thing, even as I ate it all in plain sight. Don’t worry, I’m not going to go to Every Single Subway Sandwiches.‡ I just wanted to start down a weird path of social experiments.

Where the Buck?: 15th Ave and E Thomas St
Order: Tall Peru (Bagua Grande (Not Amazonas (Reserve® Flavor))) Over Ice ⁂
Bathroom Code: 12457§
Starbucks Count: 8

† Iconic Seattle-based coffeehouse chain, to be precise, according to Google Maps:

‡ Can you even imagine? I bet they’re all nearly identical. What a waste of time and effort a project like that would be.

⁂ The Concept is also Reserve® so I was recommended this drink because of its “light, lemon notes.” Who can say no to that kind of descriptor?

§ I actually have a five-year habit of collecting bathroom codes across all coffee chains on my phone, but they change so frequently they are hardly relevant. I wonder, though, if I document these, if I can discern some sort of bathroom-code-pattern for future hacking opportunities? Or just in case any of you want to follow in my exact footsteps like some sort of pilgrimage and also use the restroom.