Today wasn't bad
So I have been a lazy bones the past two days because yesterday classes were canceled from the snow, and I don’t have class on fridays. I’ve been trying to work on some homework for this week currently and I am on the neuro chapter for my board exam prep course. I keep typing brian instead of brain and i find it annoyingly hilarious. Like brain ok i know you’re up there, stop making my hands type brian. Does my brain want to be called brian? I am unsure of this, I mean I now lovingly call it my brian out of jest and humor. Also continuing on typing stuff, my fingernails haven’t been this long in a really long time and honestly, they’ve only ever been this long two or three times in my life. Anyway, it feels weird typing for a while with longer nails so I have to take more breaks to give my fingers a break. I’m getting used to having longer nails but it’s unusual for me, so it’s just strange. I joke that I measure my anxiety with a negative correlation to how long my nails are, the longer my nails are the less anxious I am because I have been a compulsive nail biter for as long as I can remember. But I am really happy right now that I am able to paint my nails dark colors and not feel like its drawing attention to short nubby nails but instead longer, somewhat healthier nails. It’s hard trying to explain compulsive habits to people who’ve never had one because sometimes I can actively stop myself from biting my nails, but sometimes I can’t stop and it really sucks. I thought going back to school would give me a lot of anxiety but it hasn’t been nearly as bad as I expected. My brain, or brian, has been ok recently and yeah I have bad days, but it’s relieving to know that maybe, just maybe I’m doing better for now.
I hope you’re having a good night! And I’ll talk to you all next wednesday!