also how beyond late this is

My Life as a Cartoon Network Intern (and how I think you can Intern in Animation too!)

Over this past summer, I was given the amazing opportunity to be a Production Intern at Cartoon Network (I worked on Clarence; woo!)

Every once in a while I get people who either come up to me in person, or who message me on Facebook, Tumblr, Instagram etc. and ask me how I got the opportunity, and how they can intern in animation as well. Recently (Over the course of the last week or so) I’ve been asked a bunch, so I decided to create this massive master post in an attempt to get the information out to as many artists (and non-artists) as possible! 

I know a lot of people who feel like getting into the animation industry is completely impossible, (I should know, I felt the exact same way not too long ago) and I also know just how LITTLE references there actually are on finding an internship, and beyond that, the type of experiences that people who gotten the chance to intern have had. I told myself that if I got the internship, I would try to change that, and here we are! (A little late, but I really want to make this as helpful as possible)

If you all could please Reblog this to your followers I would love it! You never know who’s looking and hopefully, I can help people with my experiences! 

So to make it easier for people who don’t have the time to read all of my ramblings, AND for the sake of ease/reference; I’m going to break this post up into different sections: My Internship search My initial excitement/rejections - How I got the internship - My experience as an Intern and How Interning has helped me as an artist

My Internship search: 

Halfway through last year (My Sophomore year of college) I had decided that I would take a leap of faith and apply for some internships. I didn’t expect much of it, but my hopes were high because I thought I had at least a halfway decent portfolio, and my resume had some pretty okay animation experience on it (I’m the head of the only Animation organization on campus) and I’m majoring in animation so I had some 3D experience and 2D experience (which I’ve worked on on my own time, since it’s what I want to do) 

One of my biggest worries was the fact that I go to a state school: Southern Illinois University. The school is great, and I love it there, but I couldn’t afford art school, so I was very worried about how many opportunities there would be for me in Southern Illinois. Especially with the amount of amazing art that I see coming from people who go to schools like CalArs, Sheridan and the like. I was frustrated because I wasn’t there and felt like I would never get the opportunity to work in animation, which has been my dream since I could hold a pencil. Cartoons have changed my life, and they still do; but I was genuinely afraid that because I couldn’t afford a more art-related education, that I wouldn’t get the opportunity to tell stories like I’ve always dreamed. (But I digress) 

As I was saying: I was doing all of your standard (I want/need a job) searches to try to find something in animation: Glassdoor,,; stuff like that. FUN FACT: I’ve read every single Glassdoor review for both Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon. Every Job. All of them.

Some internships are a lot easier to find: Nickelodeon, Disney, Titmouse

While some are WAAAAAY more elusive: Cartoon Network… 

This narrowed my search down from a bunch of animation studios.. to a handful. My candidates were: Nickelodeon, Dreamworks and Titmouse. (All wonderful animation studios!) Now here’s where it gets interesting:

 My initial excitement/Rejections:

I didn’t hear back from any of them! NOT ONE. Which I learned after a very long, VERY stressful waiting period. (At this time it was early to mid April) Now; I knew that I was really too young to be applying for the internships, (I’m young for my grade so I was 19 at the time) And I knew that all of these internships specified that they wanted a Junior or above, but I figured since the year was almost over and I had good grades that MAYBE, they would let me slide. But I had no real experience working in animation, and although my hopes were high, they were also reeeeeeeal low. 

After waiting for the few weeks that I did, and not hearing a peep, I was dejected, frustrated, and I felt like there was no hope for me… Which leads us to…


When it comes to how I actually GOT the job: The answer I want to give you guys is that it was complete luck, and that by a series of random occurrences, somehow I was offered the position…. BUT, that’s only half true. Honestly, I worked really hard on making sure that I had as good a résumé as I possibly could: 

By that, I mean that I’ve worked really hard in school to get good grades/dean’s list/honors program, etc.; and I also started an animation organization on campus. (There’s a major, but there was a huge lack of enthusiasm and community within the program at SIU so I wanted to help to bring other artists and myself closer, and make great art while we’re at it) 

On top of that, I wrote (what I think was) a really good cover letter. But… Even with all three of those things, I don’t know if I would have gotten the position if it wasn’t for the internship coordinator at my school. I go to Southern Illinois University, and she pointed me in the direction of the Cartoon Network internship. (The Turner website isn’t like Nickelodeon, they only post internships when there’s a position to be filled)

LUCKILY for me, the Producer of Clarence (The wonderful Keith Mack) is an alum from SIU, so he connected with the internship coordinator (bless her heart) and I learned exactly when the position opened up. My resume and things got sent straight to him. I got a Skype interview a couple of weeks later, and I got accepted the day of the interview!

So I mean… Looking back, it was half luck, half hard work. 

It’s not like the grades and stuff really matter outside of college; Grades are just arbitrary letters, after all. But, I say that to say that I’ve tried to work hard in college even though I’m not at an art school, and that if you’re focused, it doesn’t really matter WHAT you’re good at; but how hard you work and the type of person you are. You can never go to college but be an amazing artist and an amazing person, and if you meet that ONE right person, or if you’re at that ONE correct place at the correct time; amazing things can happen; and I FIRMLY believe that. 

While I was at CN I was talking to someone (I don’t know if it’s best to call her out by name?..) But anyway she was telling me about how some of the artists are found at CN and she told me that Tumblr, YES TUMBLR. Is a HUUUUUUUUGE factor in the hiring of some people! So if you can… POST POST POST! Putting your art out there is the absolute best way to get seen. You NEVER know who’s looking at your artwork, and this website is an amazing platform for sharing, and learning about art. (And as a shameless plug: The blog Artists-Everyday is actually meant for just that ;) check it ouuuuut)

But moving forward; let’s talk about: 


The interview to be an intern at CN was both really intimidating, and really comfortable at the same time. I love animation pretty much more than anything, so the idea that a single interview could determine whether or not I got a life-changing opportunity was pretty much one of the most daunting things that I could think of. The fact that I was in southern Illinois RIGHT at the time that I would have had to interview really didn’t help either… It was really scary to me, because it meant that I wasn’t going to be able to interview in person. It was a Skype interview, (a group one at that) and it was my first time ever interviewing for a position online. 

Once I got past all of the initial fear, the interview was smooth sailing. They had already seen my resume and cover letter; so we really just spent a lot of time talking about casual things: my favorite animated movie, what my favorite episode of Clarence was, etc. It wasn’t like your usual interview where they ask “why would we hire you” or “what is your greatest weakness” and I really appreciated that. They weren’t robots, they weren’t the ANIMATION GODS like I was imagining in my head – they were actual people, who happen to love animation, and the interview reflected that. 

I learned that I had gotten the position the day that I interviewed, and I’m SO GLAD I didn’t have to wait any more days, because at that point I was on fire on the inside. II don’t know what the hiring process was like for interns on different shows, so don’t take my word for how long it’ll take if you make it this far) 


There is no one word to describe how amazing it is to work at Cartoon Network. A lot of CN stuff is “hush hush” high security, and they don’t allow you to take pictures of the inside of the buildings - So I’m not going to say much, other than: It’s magic. Pure magic. But I will say one thing: Free food. AT ALL TIMES. EVERY DAY. 

Working there is one of the most creatively satisfying things I’ve ever done in my life. The people, the atmosphere… it was all so inspiring. I’ve learned more in those past three months than I have in the last two years, and It’s all because I was surrounded by so many people who are better than me. People, who I might add, are some of the greatest, nicest, and most helpful people I’ve met in a long time. Plus, Cartoon Network really goes out on a limb to take care of their employees. 

I got to sit in on voice actors doing their recordings, I got to see storyboard pitches, I got to see animatics and assets for episodes that were unaired, and it was all being created right in front of me by such PASSIONATE people. 

I EVEN GOT TO MEET TOM KENNY. He remembered my name… 

As a production intern you get to see the logistic side of things: and you really grow to appreciate Production and that side of the industry, because without the production team, there would be no show! Even though I want to be a storyboard artist, I now know more about the industry and Cartoon Network as a whole, and it makes me feel much more connected to the shows that I watch on television.

One of the other biggest things about the program is the fact that I got to take storyboard/character design tests for practice, and I got the chance to pitch a show to the studio, in front of the Clarence Crew and even some really important executives! which was an AMAZING opportunity that I learned a TON from. I got amazing feedback, and I had to push myself harder than I’ve ever pushed myself before. Mentally, artistically, and personally. 


It’s possible. Being an intern at an animation studio is possible. Getting a job in animation is possible. Making friends in animation, and actually feeling like you belong to something you’ve dreamed about since you were a child is POSSIBLE. It doesn’t matter where you go to school, it doesn’t matter if you’re afraid, and it doesn’t matter what you look like. People are drawn to people who are genuine; and if you love animation, or production, or storyboarding or character design, and you work hard and try to really open yourself up artistically; you CAN do it. Take it from the 20 year old black guy who loves anime, video games and cartoons. You can do it. 

I don’t know how many people will see this or how helpful it actually is; but PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE feel free to share this info with your followers, and on top of that if you guys EVER have any questions about my experiences or need me to clarify anything for ANY reason you’re absolutely welcome to contact me! 

I know how many people would love to intern, and I know (from experience) how DREADFUL It is to find conducive information about how the process works and how YOU can get an internship. 

Hope you guys stuck with this post till the end, and like I said if you ever have any more questions, (hell, or if you even want to share YOUR art with me… I’m always open!) 

TL;DR:                  This Gif Sums it Up 


Yuri snorted, trying to keep from laughing. Otabek looked up from his book curiously.
“What’s so funny?” He asked.
It took Yuri far longer than it should’ve to respond, breaking out into full on laughter. He rolled closer to Otabek, the comfort of the bed suddenly forgotten.
“I found fan art,” Yuri replied in between giggles.
“You. But you’re completely naked.”
Otabek’s face turned approximately six shades of red. “W- what?!”
“…I’m responding to it.”
“What are you saying?” Otabek made a grab for the phone in his boyfriend’s hand, but Yuri was quick to dodge.
“I’m only pointing out the inaccuracies!” He insisted. He hummed thoughtfully, examining the drawing. He began typing, speaking every word as he went, “Good, but inaccurate. His six-pack is not that defined, neither is his v-line.”
Otabek looked as if he were about to self destruct. Yuri reveled in this newfound side of the older boy. He smirked mischievously before adding, “Also, his dick is bigger-”
This time, the Kazakh boy managed to grab the phone, but it was too late. The damage had already been done.
“Oops,” Yuri said in a way that definitely held no apologetic tones. Otabek groaned, embarrassed beyond belief. “I’m sorry, Beka, but they needed these details for future drawings.”
“How would you feel if you found a naked drawing of you online?” Otabek challenged.
“How would you?” Yuri shot back defiantly.
The older boy had no idea how to respond. He was finished.


ART STYLE CHALLENGE!! FT. my favorite ham artists (with honorable mention of birdloaf, unfortunately i could not find a sufficient ref of philip in a sketchier format :///) I tried to emulate everyone’s styles down to the brushes!! did I do it okay? i think i did!! Honestly I’m a little terrified at my style malleability, and also disappointed because i’m drawing like this when i obv have the ability to go beyond that?? and yet…

(can you see who influenced me && how lol)

@me wyd

@spibbles YOU…. YOU. You freaking astound me, your style is fantastic and lately it’s been so warm and nice and all your shapes are a-fucking-plus, and your color usage is gorgeous and your shading is On Point and your rate of improvement is 10,000 penstrokes per hour, you’ve left me in the goddamn dust and i just….. go d

@raythrill you and @huitality are the only blogs I follow as closely as I follow you two and honestly it’s so great to see your styles bounce off of each other and I adore you guys’ style okay?? Ray I love your color usage and shading and I’m pretty sure I already sent you an ask that’s just me gushing but Hui you’re also really great and your anatomy and proportions and posing is (100 OK emojis) and the thick lines are a good reminder that I can make thick lines, not go lineless, and still be a good artist

@terror-in-the-dream GOD………….. YOUR SHAPES AND SHADING AND E Y E S… GORGEOUS i can’t believe you exist. also i adore the way you draw plants and flowers too and your blocky shading is lovely. i’d love to see intense expressions from you tho, most of em seem v calm???

@lauwurens tbh i probably have no right to tag you but Gosh, I haven’t seen anyone else who adores philip to such a degree and also your style is absolutely lovely I adore it so much what the fuck,, philip’s curls and and your eyes and GOD, everything is like, perfect

@eightmonkeys your usage of shapes and your flow of figure is the most unique and absolutely amazing thing i’ve ever seen i love it ok… and it’s also a really good reminder for me that things don’t have to look v realistic to look fantastic

@pia-soleildiddle MMMM GOD I’VE SEEN YOUR ANIMATICS AND YOU’RE SO FUCKING C R E A T I V E THAT IT HURTS MY SOUL, WHAT IN HELL, your interpretations have FLOORED me, also I adore the little unique things you put on all the characters, like ham’s double cowlick and jeff/laf’s forehead lock, and philip’s also double cowlick, and jfc, why are you so good

@kei-pai i……… you…,,, god i don’t know i guess the simplicity just attracts me, and also just the pure stylistic factor is great I can’t name why I like your style in particular, it’s probably the fluidity, but honest to god i like yours a lot but I can’t name why (edit: 3 days later and only now i realize I’ve left out the freckles oops)

B99 + Cooking Class AU: in which Kevin is a renowned but jaded food critic, who starts teaching a cooking class in an attempt to rediscover his love for food. 

Kevin had been chief food critic for The New York Times for over a decade, had published four best-selling cookbooks, and had appeared as a guest judge in hundreds of Iron Chef episodes. He had attained everything he once wanted as a culinary student (and more), yet he found himself unhappy; eating was no longer a joy, reviewing restaurants seemed like a chore, and appearing on TV felt unbearably fake. 

After a great deal of coaxing from his husband, he finally decides to take a sabbatical from the Times. He spends the first couple months of this break vacationing in Paris with Raymond and returns to New York considerably less burnt out. 

It takes another few weeks of soul searching, but he finally settles on starting a small beginner/intermediate cooking class for adults outside of the culinary arts field. (He isn’t quite ready to face pretentious aspiring professionals just yet, and he knows there’s a special sort of joy in helping someone make a perfect soft boiled egg for the first time.) 

The students of his class all sign up for different reasons:

  • Charles had been following Kevin’s career since his grandmother had given him a Times subscription for his twelfth birthday. 
  • Terry just wants to learn how to make healthy, delicious meals for his babies.
  • Amy’s convinced taking this class will help her get to know her boss, Kevin’s husband.  
  • Gina saw Kevin on Food Network once and is convinced this is her in for meeting celebrities. 
  • Jake had been dragged there by Gina and “wasn’t interested in this stupid cooking class at all” – until he saw Amy from outside the kitchen doors.
  •  No one knows why Rosa is there.

Keep reading

Late Night Snacks and Underwear - 5

Fandom: Marvel’s Avengers

Summary: Y/N and Peter run into each other late one night. After, she is beyond confused about how she sees Peter. And Peter? Well he was already in love with her, but it takes advice, teasing, and another surprise encounter for them to face their feelings.

Words: 1,100+

Pairing/Characters: PeterParkerxStark!Reader, Bucky, the whole fam

Warning: More awkwardness. Partial nudity.

Author’s Note: I love Bucky acting like a big brother. I really hope you guys like this… I kinda worry every time I post a new part tbh. But, here goes nothing! Take a look lil ones. (Also, I think there’s only going to be one more part after this…..)

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

Originally posted by koenigreus

Contrary to popular belief, Bucky Barnes was one of the kindest and most thoughtful people you’d ever met. Sure, he had a metal arm and a forced-murderous past, but you felt unfathomably comforted when he gently prodded you to tell him about Peter.

Keep reading

Gag Reel (Chris Pine x Reader)

Imagine: You are a famous actor and in a relationship with your co-star Chris.

Pairing: Chris Pine x Reader

Warnings: none, just fluffff (because Chris ia a adorable human beeing and i love him more than i love life itself)

A/N: I truly belive that there should be more imagines about this beautifull and amazing actor, with wicked blue eyes. But thats a problem i am going to solve, starting with this imagine.

Originally posted by pinerage

“So,Chris..”,James says, as soon as the screams of the audience disappeared,and the host of the Late Late Show gives him a welcoming smile:“Star Trek Beyond was released yesterday, and I have to say it’s a pretty awesome movie!”

Chris, who sat infront of him also smiles:“You’re right, I am very lucky to have the- the opportunity to work together with so many amazing actors and people on a movie like this.”

On the small screen infront of them appears a picture of Chris and you, his fiancée:“Your future wife is also in the movie, how is the “engagement life”? Because I can remember for me and my wife it was very stressful.“

The blue eyed man just laughs:"Oh man, it’s great . Sometimes stressful, of course. But at the end I am going to marry her, I mean that’s pretty awesome-”

The crowd “awws” and the face of Chris goes slightly red.

“So, you and Y/N met 2009, am I right?”,James asks, of course he knows that hes right but the story of how you two met is both beautiful and hilarious.

“That’s right!”,Chris answers and nods:“We were filming the first Star Trek movie, and she was sitting at the same table as Zachary and Karl, because she already met Zachary on the set of American Horror Story, and when we first made eye contact I was so confused about the whole situation that I tripped and fell onto her.”,the whole crowd and James are now laughing:“And instead of saying sorry, or something like that I just stood up and walked into my trailer.”

James smiles:“And then?”

“She knocked at the door of my trailer, and when I let her in she just smiled and introduced herself to me.”,Chris sigh’s:“She was so nice, even though I am the reason why her clothes were ruined.”

“I don’t think that she thought it was too bad!”,James says and looks directly into the camera:“Now here’s a small clip of Star Trek Beyond.”

“Where is Kay?”,James Kirk, who is looking at Scotty with a scared impression takes a step up to his friend:“Tell me she’s with you.”

“Jim!”,the voice of your Character,Kay, is loud but yet you can’t see her.
But as soon as Jim is turning around, you are jumping right into his arms:“Oh god, you’re alive.”

“Of course I am, Kay!”,Kirk says and smirks, before he gives you a deep kiss:“ I am not planning on leaving you.”

“I hope so..”

“Romantic!”,James says, and Chris smiles:“Is this star trek or a new version of Titanic?”

“No no -”,Chris laughs:“ Not the whole movie is like this, there is a lot of action, and also drama -”

“So I met Y/N a couple of weeks ago, when she was on my show let’s see what she has to say-”,James says and points to the screen.

“My favorite Bloopers with Chris?”,you giggle and raise your eyebrows:“There are a few, because you know, everyone on set is often playing with lines and that leads to the outtakes. I truly enjoy seeing how the fans react to all these clips-”

“Oh your fans love them!”,James says and the audience starts to scream a little bit.

“Yeah, yeah.”,you say and your Y/H/C falls into your face, before you run a hand through your hair:“And you know, Chris is always so clever with it, sometime he’s so sneaky that you won’t realize that the line changed, till he starts laughing! So one day, we were all filming and after I said something like "you know we have to make this quick!” he says out of nowhere “This is something you’re not saying in a few hours!”-“

The whole audience starts to laugh and a few woman start to scream hysterical, James on the other hand is just laughing:"Oh my god that’s amazing!”

“I just realized what he said after one minute..the rest of the cast didn’t realized as well, and when I looked into Karls eyes I immediately understood that that’s not his normal line-”

“You really thought that this was his normal line-?”,James asks and laughs again, now tears are forming in his eyes and he wipes a few away, still laughing.

“He just said it with such a professionalism- that I didn’t really paid attention to the actual line..just to my own one and my own expression!”,you answer and the crowd starts laughing.

“So when you two get married!”,James says as soon as the videoclip ends:“Youre only saying stuff like that?”

“You bet!”

anonymous asked:

Hello dear! Your blog brings me lotsa happiness just so you know! :) also, can I ask for scenarios of how the chocobros would react to their s/o dawning their respective outfits (nsfw if you're up to it!)? Thank you so much!

Hi Sweetie! I’m so happy you like coming here! I love when couples exchange/ take over the others wardrobe.



Noctis muttered,  he had missed three of his  daily naps and it was beyond midnight, he needed sleep! But he couldn’t!

He was even in a comfy hotel bed, away from the others! He made Ignis buy you two a single room, and tossed them down the hallway, not to be seen until the late check out tomorrow. AND the reason the Prince couldn’t sleep was because you decided you wanted to take the longest shower in the world tonight of all nights!

He’d go to sleep, than would wake up to you not being in the bed! Only to doze again for about 4 minutes before waking up again, and you still weren’t there! So when he finally heard the water shut off, the Prince was ready! He was gonna cuddle you so hard, and then just sleep, he didn’t care if you prodded him or stated that he was making your arm go to sleep, this was your punishment!

So when you stepped into the dim room, in one of his clean shirts, that reached your hips and thighs. Those beautiful thighs, those pillow thighs, the shirt raising high at the chest, not use to the extra there he found himself awake.

“Mm, that was worth it. Camping really makes you appreciate a nice shower.” You pur, sitting on your edge of the bed, as Noctis took a good amount of the other side of the Queen. Shrieking as you were pulled back to the bed, to rest against Noctis’s chest. “Noct.”

Noctis muttered softly, as he nuzzled against you, the scent of him from his clothes that you had on, but the scent of you underneath was amazing! He loved it! You two mingled together perfectly, and it turns out he had a little more energy to give.

“Hey, so uhh, what’s under the shirt?”  He asked hands wandering.

“Why don’t you figure it out.” You purred, only to be thrown to your back, as your once sleepy time Prince was now fully awake, and reaching underneath the shirt on your body, which currently had nothing underneath it.

And if that boner rutting against your leg meant anything, it was that Noctis had figured that out.



Prompto sat within your apartment, you had invited him over stating you had a rather interesting photo opportunity for him, so to bring his camera. He sat on your couch, where he had set up a small little studio for the two of you.

“You ready, Prompto?” You called from your bedroom, where you had been getting ready for the last 20 minutes.

Prompto turned, as he quickly jumped to his feet. You stood in his “digital” shirt, his vest, and a pair of cheetah printed shorts with knee high black boots.

“How do I look?”

“You look…you look, OMG bae you look fucking hot.”

You giggled stepping forward pressing a kiss to the tip of his nose, “I take that as you’re ready to start?”

Prompto automatically rose his camera, the item typically glued to his hand, as he put the viewfinder to his eye. Snapping again and again, as you posed for him. The both of you seeming on the same wavelength as you often modeled for the man when he got a new filter or lens.

You smiled, noticing that Prompto had begun to go into photographer mode, just like you expected, he was so busy trying to get the perfect angle. So time to turn up the heat, first just lowering the vest down to your shoulders, than losing it all together. Next you gripped at the bottom of the shirt, flashing your stomach and even a few peek-a-boo of the ribs, before ripping it off your body, to show the matching printed bra underneath.

You sacrificed a $30 bra for this, it had better work!

Yet judging by the tent in those light blue cargo pants it was working, just one more thing.

“You know, sweetie, I’m not wearing any underwear.”

That always got Prompto’s attention, and the blonde lowered his camera, you quickly reached out taking the camera, placing it on the side table. Taking his hand, as you pulled at the slight elastic band of the shorts, before placing his hand down the front.

The second his fingers touched you, and only you, Prompto’s mouth was on your own, and that photoshoot was over.



“You gonna be any longer?” Gladiolus groaned tapping his knee, waiting for you to exit the bedroom.

It was suppose to be movie night, which was suppose to have started 10 minutes ago, but you still hadn’t come out the back. After stating you had been confined to a bra and pants long enough you rushed to the back to change. The popcorn was ready and so was the beer, but you were taking your sweet time.

“Sorry to make you wait, baby.”

“About damn tim…Fuck babe.” Gladiolus chuckled, his words falling on his lips, as you stood there, wearing his button down and underwear alone. The top open, yet due his barrel chest, it didn’t hang open to wide, covering just your nipples, but gave him plenty of cleavage, and view of your cute bellybutton. “Isn’t this a nice treat.”

“Glad you like it.” You giggled, moving to sit beside the man on the couch, gasping as he grabbed your arm, pulling you into his lap.

“Excuse me Miss, but I believe this is your seat this evening.” He chuckled, arms wrapping around you, as you grew settled into his lap, as he placed kisses against your neck.

You didn’t even get beyond the previews before you found yourself, between the beers and popcorn on the coffee table. Shrieking above the repeating main menu repeating it’s title music, you large boyfriend pounding away at you from behind.

Maybe you could try for the movie again tomorrow, since tonight, you already knew that the man wasn’t going to let you free anytime soon.



“There she is.” Prompto called waving you over.

You made your way over to the table at the restaurant inside of the hotel that you all were currently resting out. Having unfortunately got into town, during the end of rainy season. So you were stuck here for another couple of days, when the weather let up, and you could continue on.

“Sorry, I’m late, unfortunately the front desk seems to have misplaced all of my blouses.” You apologize, always one on time, just like your boyfriend, who had stood to pull your chair out for you. “Thank you, Ignis.”

“My pleasure.” Ignis stated, a familiar song and dance for the two of you. Yet it made Ignis falter, you were wearing his purple button down, tucked with a mauve tulip skirt, with your black kitten heels. The buttons of the shirt were undone to the fourth button, showing off quite a bit of cleavage as the shirt wasn’t tailored to a woman’s figure.

You smiled to your companions as Ignis pushed your chair in, before moving to sit down next to you. Almost immediately his hand was placed on your thigh, which was rather bold for the man, yet as it was covered by the tablecloth you thought nothing of it. Even Ignis could get starved for attention from time to time.

“We have already order, My Dear. I hope you do not mind that I placed an order for you.”

You giggled softly leaning into him, “You know me better than I know myself, Ignis.”

You found it rather strange that all throughout dinner, Ignis hand remained firmly on your thigh, even while you ate. You knew that Ignis was a man of many talents but to eat with his least dominant hand was a feat you had just learned that he could do.

After dinner, both Prompto and Noctis had scurried off to see the awesome arcade they had spotted coming in, while Gladiolus stated he was going to go check out the sauna and gym. While you had mentioned that you wanted to check in on the room, to see if your items had return to the room, or else you’d be spending money on a few blouses, or wearing your Citadel uniform for the rest of the trip.

“They are luckily giving us a discount for the little confusion.” You explained to Ignis as you opened the hotel room door, yet no sooner had you both stepped through the threshold, did you feel a large hand cup your ass. “Ignis!”

“I do apologize, my love, yet you look rather ravishing. Had I know that you looked so wonderful within my shirt, I would have done away with your blouses long ago.”  Ignis purred against your ear, as he spun you around.

You didn’t have time to retort as Ignis pressed his lips against, your own, leading you to the bed. You hadn’t even noticed that all of your blouses were returned, and pressed free of charge.

Remember when you asked me why I love you and I couldn’t exactly explain? Of course you’re beautiful, even far beyond beautiful. And you’re a good kisser, too. Also you’re a passionate lover, and our minds are quite alike. But I think… I think it’s the little things that made me fall for you, and still do, every day, over and over again. I think it’s hidden in the way you talk about your friends, or how you’re late for work every morning, but never forget to kiss me before you leave. I think it’s because we both know I cook like shit and often my dishes taste like baked air with salt and pepper, but you shove it in until the very last bite and look at me and say “Thank you darling”, and be genuinely grateful for it. Or maybe it’s because you know that certain simple things that seem so easy for other people, require so much effort for me. You see through me and allow me to grow. It’s in your kind attitude towards strangers, it’s in the graceful and peaceful manner you approach my family with. You fill up a room with your bubbly spirit, yet never demand too much space. It’s how your voice floods into a high pitch when you’re finally able to play with your cats again. It’s not only your body, but the elegance you move it with. Not just your beautiful face, but the way in which it exposes the depths of your soul by just a subtle twitch or a hurting smile. It’s in the way your hand seeks mine at night, after a long silence, when we turned our back towards each other. Or maybe… Maybe I just love all those things because someway, somehow we just found one another and it really just doesn’t matter, because darling I love you, and literally nothing in the world could change my mind.
The Shadows Under the Window

This came from a little half-dream I had, when I’d started to wake up but was kind of dozing off again.  (Also I don’t know how formatting works for submissions so if you need to add a ‘keep reading’ somewhere feel free)

It happens to so many of us.

Perhaps you’re up late studying or putting the final touches on a paper; perhaps it’s the weekend, your friends are out of town and your roommate has already gone to bed, leaving you to your own thoughts.  Some nights the shadows collecting like dust in the corners of your dorm room beyond the pale glow of your laptop screen will seem to press a little closer, the branches swaying in the fog outside your window will sound a little more like fingernails on the glass.  For some, those are the nights you leave an extra cup of milk outside your door and double-check the clasp of your iron chain before you go to bed.    But for others, those are the nights you find yourself thinking: “I wonder…”

Don’t break the salt line in the doorway as you leave; leave a note for your roommate, just in case.

In the older history building, some of the first floor has been renovated, but the second floor never has.  The classrooms up there are always faintly musty and the blackboards never seem to get clean no matter how much you try and erase them.  The one in the far eastern corner of the building, the least used of any on that floor,  is crowded with too many of those old wooden chairs with the desks attached.  Classes held there sometimes find handprints on the blackboard in the mornings.  Whoever comes in first erases them and leaves a packet of butter or coffee creamer on their chair when they leave.  The main entrance is the only door to stay unlocked at night.  Make sure the salt packets are still in your pockets before you go inside; say a polite hello to the slender cat-shaped shadow sitting under the streetlight as you pass.

Bring a pen and paper with you, and an offering– depending on your request, you may need more than dining-hall butter or cream cheese packets.  A bottle of Bailey’s, heavy cream, even a pint of good vanilla ice cream could earn you a bit of extra favor.  

Move quietly once you’re inside; don’t let the front door slam behind you when you come in, don’t run up the stairs.  Take your time down the second-floor hallway.  Stay aware of your surroundings, but don’t look too closely into the shadows or the windows in the doors of the other rooms.  

Open the door of the eastern classroom slowly.  There will be a deep shadow in the farthest corner from the door, just under the windows where the light of the streetlamp doesn’t quite clear the sill.  Sit down in the light, on the floor near the corner.  Face into the shadows, but leave a few feet between you and them.  Be still.  Don’t turn around.  You may feel someone watching you, hear a creak like someone settling into a chair; don’t turn around.

The eyes-crawling-up-your-back feeling will fade if you sit and wait.  The door might open and click softly closed again behind you.  They will leave you be if you leave Them be.

If you wait long enough, she will come, should it please her to.  The corner will be empty.  You will blink, and she will be there.  Try not to jump.  

A small, slight figure, slender and pale. Round dark china-doll eyes will study you from the shadows as long cornsilk-blonde hair drapes around her head and shoulders.  Set your offering on the floor between you, and when she nods her approval write your question down and hold the paper out to her.  Don’t let your hand cross into the shadows.  You may feel, for just a moment as she takes it from you, a faint cool touch like fingertips across your wrist, though her child-sized hand does not leave the shadow under the window.  Keep your hands in your lap, out of reach, while she reads.

If you request a favor, remember the rules: be polite, choose your words carefully, gamble with nothing you can’t afford to lose.  If she accepts, she will look up at you and nod.  If she refuses, she will give you back the paper.  Bow politely where you sit before rising to leave.  

She may grant the occasional favor, but most come to her for questions.  The sort of questions with answers hinted at in whispers in dark dorm rooms and notes of caution left on study room desks, that make students who have Seen touch their iron and walk a little faster.  There are risks to asking too much, of course, and every answer has its price, but if you want to Know, she will tell you.  Her voice will sound like a whisper into a porcelain teapot, muted and echoing at the same time; her lips will never seem to move.

(You may notice, as she speaks, that you have yet to see her blink)

When she has answered your question, tell her you appreciate her time– keep your voice low– and that you will remember your agreement.  She will nod, and as you bow and rise to leave you will hear the hiss of tearing paper.  Don’t turn around; keep your pace even as you walk to the door.  As you open the door, you may glimpse from the corner of your eye the movement as she brings her hands to her mouth, or hear the sound of someone chewing as you step into the hall.  If you glance back into the room the reflected light from the window, moving as you close the door, may momentarily cast a shadow on the wall in the far back corner; a shadow seven feet high with deer-like branching horns and long hands with too many fingers.  Don’t stare; doesn’t matter what it looked like, you saw nothing.  Shut your eyes if you have to.  Close the door softly and walk out of the building the same way you came in.  Walk with purpose, but don’t rush; keep your wits about you, as always.

Should you glance back up at the window of the eastern classroom (don’t) you might see a white face in the window for just a moment, a small hand pressed against the glass.

Eyes forward.  Walk back to your dorm; be polite to the shadows but don’t linger.  Make sure the door latches behind you when you enter the building.  Watch the salt line by your door when you get back to your room.  If the milk or butter is gone, set out more before you lock the door for the night.  Put the note aside out of sight (no need to worry your roommate, and you never know when you might need it again).  Check your iron chain again before you go to bed.

Don’t forget where you heard what you learned.  She won’t.  


Kuroshitsuji Chapter 129 Analysis: Gaging the Morality and Possible Lack of Self of R!Ciel

Now that we’ve got the twins, many recent posts within the Kuro fandom have debated whether or not R!Ciel can be classified as the “evil twin,” following the event of Agni’s death and in comparison with O!Ciel.  While it is possible to generalize him as such and it is most likely that he was one of the two killers that had attempted to murder Soma and killed Agni, it also opens up a lot of questions in how we might interpret his behavior and why he is the way he is. 

For now, let us start with the most recent chapter and the true introduction to
R!Ciel’s character.  As O!Ciel and Sebastian enter the manor, we find that R!Ciel is already inside and has already interacted with the other servants: Finnie, Meyrin, and Baldroy.  He greets his brother calmly, and even shows concern regarding O!Ciel possibly suffering from his illness as a result of being out in the rain knowing the latter’s weak constitution.  He also tells O!Ciel that, “There is no need to worry anymore.  I will never leave your side again."    

Based on this, if we don’t assume he’s faking, we can interpret that he truly does care for O!Ciel, his brother.  There’s no telling how much he knows as of yet in regards to what Ciel has been doing over the past three years, but he’s not surprised and doesn’t seem to care if he does know that O!Ciel has been posing as him.  He’s acting almost as if everything is perfectly normal.

So what constitutes as ‘normal’ for R!Ciel?  First off, the obvious: He loves his brother.  If we reflect on R!Ciel’s appearances throughout the manga prior to his reveal in this chapter, O!Ciel has always depicted him as this protective, comforting figure that he was always able to turn to.  During the Green Witch Arc when he was suffering and basically trapped within the confines of his own mind, it was his twin–out of all people–that he envisioned being there to console him beyond the guilt O!Ciel carries as a result of the other being sacrificed.  Now, while we can’t fully trust those flashbacks due to the possibility of O!Ciel placing his brother in high regard as a result of familial love and as a result of his fragile state of mind, Chapter 129 would also support that R!Ciel is more of the protecting, loving sort where it concerns O!Ciel.     

Now, stepping into the Phantomhive manor, R!Ciel shouldn’t have had any idea who Meyrin, Finnie, and Baldroy were as only Tanaka was among the original staff before the attack on the Phantomhives.  However, based on the fact that the three had no idea about the case of their being twins until the very end of the chapter, R!Ciel just accepted the fact that they were there and already knew who he was.  If he knew about O!Ciel posing as him, that just makes it worse, because then that means he purposefully led them to believe he was O!Ciel instead of explaining things to them before O!Ciel’s arrival to the manor.  Why is this important?  Because he’s the aristocrat: They’re the servants.  As Tanaka had said during Book of Murder, "The head of the Phantomhive household should not be shaken by something as trivial as the death of a servant.  I never once saw the master lose his composure due to such trifles."  Now, we’re talking about a human life here.  Being called "trivial” and “a trifle."  On top of that, they’re servants of a dangerous family–always left at the risk of getting killed and being replaced.  This is how R!Ciel views Finnie, Meyrin, and Baldroy: Another trio of replacements for their last batch of servants.  Their presence is just something he accepts as a grim result of the attack.  This shuffle is normal to him.

Take that note to how the Victorian society placed a strong focus on social class, and it gets worse.  Even well into the Edwardian period following the Victorians, your class dictated your education, your social behavior, the places you were to go, the people you were to spend time with, and everything in-between.  For example, on the Titanic, its maiden voyage was celebrated by allowing 2nd class passengers to get a taste of the luxury of 1st class passengers by allowing them within certain areas of the ship for a short while that would normally have been excluded to them.  3rd class passengers were not allowed in these areas and the differences between the three of them were striking.  There was an African-American family on board that, while having enough money to purchase a 1st class room, was only allowed to purchase a 2nd class room because of their heritage–which leads me to my second point of what I’m about to say later.  Victorians, as a result of international colonization, also strictly differentiated each other by culture and heritage: They actually tried to come up with studies that dictated how human a human being was based on where they came from.  The elites of this era always tended to try to dehumanize others globally and among their own society.  They were elitists. 

R!Ciel shows strong hints of following that elitist mindset–in part, because he’s a Phantomhive and then also because he’s an aristocrat.  It’s strongly hinted that he views himself as being better, or more human, than the Phantomhive servants–as well as with Soma and Agni due to their being from India.  That’s why, if that’s him from the previous chapter (which it’s a guarantee, I just don’t want to call it that since we didn’t actually see a face) he says to Soma, "Don’t you presume to touch me.”  Soma may be a prince, Soma might’ve been living at the townhouse, but Soma's a stranger and is Indian to R!Ciel, and the latter doesn’t view him as an equal.  He doesn’t seem to be affected and even smiles when he’s called out as an imposter, but he glares at Finnie when Finnie speaks up.  Because Finnie is a servant, who in his mind shouldn’t have a place to voice himself: He just works there and should know his place. 

O!Ciel is a brat, but even so he treats the servants more like his family.  He tries to help Soma and protected Agni’s identity when he could’ve just thrown him to the Yard.  He spares Sullivan instead of killing her and trusts her enough to be his ally while helping her in London–all while making sure the Queen doesn’t get that deadly gas she has the ability to create despite it giving him more work and leaving him to be forced to rely on her faith and good nature.  He let Snake into his house, just the other servants, despite the attempt on his life and the possibility of Snake finding out the truth–because then Snake would really have to die.  He could’ve had Sebastian kill Doll right as soon as she showed up, but he didn’t give the order until she attacked.  He’s an Evil Noblemen and will sacrifice innocent people, but more often than not he does what he can to avoid it and he doesn’t judge others solely by their origins.  The only time he’s ever really killed someone for the sake of destruction was when he killed the children in Book of Circus–and I personally largely blame that on PTSD rather than an actual judgment call of "yeah, they couldn’t be saved" made with complete sanity because he wasn’t in his right mind at that moment and he himself is a living example of moving forward beyond tragedy, whether he believes it or not.   

“We’re strangers, so of course we’re different.  What is there to be ashamed of?  In any case, I’m free to choose my companions.” –Ciel to Snake, in Chapter 52

R!Ciel though… He might take to the title of an Evil Noble far more than his brother.  He doesn’t have to force people away, because it doesn’t seem like he cares for them anyway.  He cares for O!Ciel because their aristocrats and their family.  If we take it that R!Ciel was also the one who said “I don’t need any fake brothers,” in the chapter Yana Toboso created in the second fan doujinshi, we can also assume that he likely even views other aristocrats as being less than him–highly possible considering the Phantomhive family’s strong ties to the Queen and the amount of betrayal among the elites. (Who could you trust?)

This elitist mindset, this idea of “I must look after my brother,” and the numbness to the deaths of others and the willingness to kill should be perfectly normal for a member of a family of Evil Nobles.  It fits well with R!Ciel’s character, because this is what he probably grew up being taught to believe and act upon.  “I'm likely going to take up the work of a dangerous family that is involved in horrible things. Tragedy is going to happen both ways: Better get used to it."   He also fits well for the mantra of advice that the Undertaker claims to have been telling each generation of Phantomhives:

 "Even though I told him to hold each and every soul dear.  Because you hold great power you gradually fail to understand the importance of things that cannot be recovered.  You will realize that once it’s too late.  How many times have I told you and others the same warning?” –Undertaker, Chapter 35      

The problem is, R!Ciel clearly has not learned that lesson yet. Granted, Undertaker is a hypocrite, but he basically is saying to cherish life.  R!Ciel shows no signs of doing that beyond a select few.  And that’s jarring for multiple reasons: One because it reflects on the kind of person he was prior to his being sacrificed, and two because it can also reflect on the fact that he isn’t human anymore.  What would he care about the precious fragility of life if either A.) He doesn’t even have a soul to guide him and is truly just another puppet like all of the other Bizarre Dolls, or B.) Undertaker did by some miracle manage to save his soul, but he was revived anyway so what could it matter?  He’s alive and so is O!Ciel.  I prefer A, however, because B would allude to him not caring for his parent’s deaths either. 

Going off all of that… Let's get back to talking about how R!Ciel greets O!Ciel.  There’s no talk of the tragedy or of their loss.  There’s no warm, cherishing reunion of “I’m alive!  I’m alive and I’m here for you: I’m so glad you’re alive!  Demon, get the heck out before I shoot a harpoon through your face: You’re not touching the little cinnabon muffin that is my twin!"  Instead, it’s just, "Oh, your back!  Welcome home!  You shouldn’t be the rain,” as if nothing that they went through happened.  A normal person does not act this way.  There should be emotion.  There should be an acknowledgment of what happened.  There isn’t.  R!Ciel treats the situation as business as usual.

This hints very well to the fact that R!Ciel isn’t human anymore and likely doesn’t have a soul.  He’s more like Agares, and is just another mindless doll under Undertaker’s command.  You can’t fake humanity.  You can try to recreate a person, but once they’re gone, that’s it.  Even if you cloned them perfectly, or saved the body, with a copy of their memories, it’s just as Undertaker said: There’s only one immortal soul.  One of them in the entire world.  Without it, everything else is just parts of a machine.  R!Ciel, this doll, remembers how it used to be before his death, and clings to that: It doesn’t have the power to learn and change its morals beyond that.  (And I’m calling R!Ciel an 'it’ now because of the high chances that 'it’ is no longer a person.)  Really, it probably doesn’t have any true essence of freewill.  If there’s any actions done on its own accord, it’s because it knows was the true R!Ciel would do and acts on that, or else what Undertaker–and maybe even O!Ciel–would want for it to do. 

I’m going to bring up the anime just for the sake of comparison: Drocell/Drossel Keinz.  Drocell was the anime equivalent of the Bizarre Dolls before they showed up.  The difference was though was that he didn’t need to directly be fed commands as the others need.  Both of the Bizarre Dolls on the Campania and at Weston, while gradually being advanced, had to be basically kept on a leash whenever Undertaker didn’t want them to go after a soul.  They knew some part of them was missing.  The first batch were like mindless beasts.  The second batch could talk so long as Undertaker fed them them right words, or they repeated words that their former selves would say and still attacked without otherwise being restrained.  This time, however, R!Ciel is likely a doll like Drocell, convinced that it’s human and it’s alive.  That it has a soul.    

“To think all this time I thought I was human.” –Drocell, Kuroshitsuji anime

Unless Undertaker actually thinks he’s giving O!Ciel more than just a walking, empty corpse, unless he’s lost his sanity that badly due to his pain, returning R!Ciel like this… I can barely even begin to imagine how tortured and torn a person–O!Ciel–would be over that.  That a doll, a figment of someone you once cherished, could look and act exactly like the person you lost without ever being more than a husk.  Seeing that, knowing that it’s a problem, and being faced with a sudden choice: “Do I accept this even though this isn’t real or do I kill this lookalike? Do I destroy the one essence left of someone I cared about, or do I let this continue for my emotional benefit?"  People grieve after a loss and then they move on.  They heal.  Bringing R!Ciel back like this does not allow that for O!Ciel, Lizzie, or Undertaker. I don’t know what is going through Undertaker’s head right now, but this is the beginning of a downhill spiral of pain and misery…                        


Then and now: Still just as cute.


I feel like there’s more throwbacks out there for this post, but I couldn’t think of any, so feel free to chime in if you think you know who’s missing.

***EDIT***: I just remembered another! Kerry Washington, DUH. She was in the first season of Boston Legal, as Chelina, the co-worker that took Alan to Texas for a last-minute execution appeal… AKA ‘the episode in which I BAWLED like a baby and stared at my screen with total disbelief, utterly devastated, as the credits rolled’. On a happier note, it’s also ‘the one in which Alan looks hot in a cowboy hat and kisses Chelina and rides a freaking mechanical bull’.And I was thankful beyond words for being so late to the Boston Legal party, 'cause I didn’t have to sit on that ending during the long, between-season months. I just hastily jumped to s02. ANYWAY, I digress. After Boston Legal ended, James and Kerry did Race, a Mamet play.

I’ll concede that Kerry isn’t exactly a distant throwback, but I’m lumping her in there anyway.

And right now I’m annoyed 'cause I can’t seem to figure out how to edit a post in order to add a photo. If anyone can assist, I’d be tremendously thankful.


the dads in this game are very cute but if im being honest i mostly got it so i could make a very gay trans dad u feel me

so here’s ahab (i literally only played like 10 minutes so idk how much room the game gives you for backstory beyond the late spouse stuff lmao) he’s a former model and currently owns a thrift store. he has bad memory problems and is also not very….smart…………..he’s got amanda’s bday tattooed on his arm so he never ever forgets it (its just kind of an arbitrary number cuz idk if she has a canon one) also in his post-modeling life he really values being able to look like an unattractive garbage can

idk who he’s gonna kiss i dont really have a preference lol (idek if im gonna draw more than this we’ll see)

While I was originally (and still sort of am) rather irked, for lack of a better word, over Akira’s approach to Kaneki/Haise this chapter, being a complete turn-around on what her previous stance seemed to be, I honestly think that this hypocracy was intentional in the story.

Lately, we’ve been seeing a lot of stuff in the narration that shows us that maybe the characters really haven’t grown as much as we assumed, and they are still stuck in a lot of their old faulty ways. In my opinion, I believe this to be another instance of that.

While finding out that so many characters have yet to better themselves when it comes to certain things is beyond frustrating, I can’t help but also note how much on an impact this all will probably have on the plot. If many key characters still have their old mindsets about so many matters, having a human/ghoul alliance is going to be near possible.

Progression in societies require individuals to make their own progress. If this theme of hypocritical actions does keep up, :re following the path of being a tragicomedy, as opposed to straight-up tragedy like TG, seems more and more likely. If I had to put my money on the most likely result for the alliance between ghouls and humankind, and ultimately the ending of :re, I’d have to say it’d be failure due to the lack of progression in mindset. I think it’d be pure irony, along the lines of “Well, we tried and failed to unite, and in the end it was our own faults we didn’t succeed. We really never do change!”

My predictions/wishes for The Future, and beyond.

The next episode is nearly upon us, and because like many of us who appreciate and care about Castiel, are casually wandering what is next for him. I want to write about what I want to happen on thursday. This is a complete gut feeling, mixed with some “research” that I need to do to make some sense so this doesn’t looks like one of my usual ramblings. This is serious, I want this to happen, even if it hurts a little.

First, some context. I just noticed that the first time we meet Cas on “Lazarus Rising” SPN 04x01 , (I personally named it “The First Blind Date”) while been interrogated by Dean, Cas starts to rummaging on a book that I assume Boby brought to the barn for the sigils that they used all over the place. This becomes a kind of trade of Cas when he meets with the boys, or while is questioned about something that he can be completely honest to discuss, he start to check papers of a current case or opens a book like trying to read it, I interpreted this as a kind of gimmick to avoid confrontation.

I know I saw this several times in other scenes, but other concrete episode was the “The Third Man” SPN 06x03 when he is being questioned about Sam’s return from hell and the civil war in heaven. So, my point is, we have come to know the traits of how Lucifer interacts with almost every other character that Mark Pellegrino uses constantly and Misha Collins portrayed very well in every detail.

As research, I review the interaction of Chuck and supposedly Lucifer inside Cas on the bunker in “We happy Few” SPN 11x22. He is holding a book while Chuck tries to start a sort of conversation with him, asking the mandatory questions about how he was and how he had changed. I believe that in this particular scene, Lucifer let Cas talk directly to Chuck, because both felt the same about how he left them. I can’t avoid to think about how in “Dark side of the moon” SPN 05X16, Cas was broken and disappointed with Chuck and the way he talked to him. You can say, maybe later when he brought him back to life he understood that he was making a kind of amendment, and forgave his words. And also later is the I ignore Chuck issue, when Lucifer is expelled by Amara from Castiel’s vessel, and when Chuck is dying Cas makes no effort on taking care of him or offered any company or assistance.

But this brought me to the prediction/wish that I been cooking lately about the next episode and the rest of the season. I believe that Joshua by Chuck’s orders made him or will upgrade Castiel to an Archangel. I think Chuck saw Castiel in that interaction, and how he stood in front of him without fear and told him in his face “screw you” from Lucifer and the second “screw all of you” from Castiel. Chuck knows that Cas has evolved beyond an Seraphim by his own means and will to serve humanity, his most precious creation, that he also learned to love trough Dean Winchester. I think he choose this time as perfect opportunity to give him the chance to stand alone in front of Lucifer and the Nephilim. And also, as you know in Jewish lore Cassiel the angel in which Cas is based was an Archangel.


Now, As I can´t avoid to look through the spoilers, I think this will happen along the next episodes, and “The future” will be the point where Cas decides to accept the actual change from Seraph to Archangel, in order to protect The Winchesters, to find Kelly and the Nephilim, that I’m not sure if he will end up protecting or have the guts to kill because of this change.

Here comes the “but”. At first you can say its great news for we the fans of Cas and how much we miss to see him with his wings and with full celestial powers. But, I have to remind you how he reacts when he is given power, exactly like Lucifer. Anyone remembers Godstiel? And also the probability that in the process of this significant change that it has to be made to evolve Castiel into an Archangel, explained by Chuck himself: “stuff of primordial creation” they probably had to reset him to factory settings.

Yes, probably forgetting everything he lived in this past 8 years with Dean and Sam Winchester. Maybe he will remember all but with a “different point of view”, as an Archangel, specifically about “humanity. I hope I’m wrong about this gloomy possibility, and right about the perspective of this mayor evolution for Castiel because of the need for a matching power against Lucifer. I will love to see him full of grace with all his powers and celestial capabilities like in season 4, and also as a shiper I want to believe that Cas will choose this, and the first thing that he will have in mind when he accept this, will be the possibility of becoming a stronger and better ally in the protection of “humanity” (cleans a little tear of feels about this).

To finish this delirant and desperate “prediction”. I want to believe, (oh X files, you taught me well about paranoia and speculation) that Cas will protect Kelly and Lucifer´s spawn because of “Lilly sunder has some Regrets” SPN 12x10. For the way Cas said: “Ignorance is no excuse” and how bad he felt in being part of the killing of a supposed Nephilim at that time. For this he needs redemption. Thru all the episodes centered on Cas of this season the same doubts and questions are presented about how he looks at himself. Is he an angel of the lord? Part of the Winchester family? A useful tool for his brothers when they need someone who do the job?

 How about Castiel the Archangel decides to ignore, first heaven that sees him as a incarnated blasphemy for his love to “humanity”. Second, he could take some time apart and away from his love for the Winchesters, whom I believe are taking him for granted. And finally he can ignore the ancient beliefs of what exactly an abomination like Lucifer’s child could bring to the world. As it supposedly never happened, how they can be sure that such creature will surely became something evil/negative? Let Castiel the Archangel to decide.

Thoughts on the love ban rule : the philosopher’s bride

If you have watched this year sousenkyo, you probably have witnessed one of the biggest surprise of the 48group : an idol announcing her marriage. Sutou Ririka from NMB48, amidst the chaos, took 10 minutes to explain how serious she is about this, leaving the audience speechless. This is once again an opportunity to talk about the love ban rule : was Riripon right on announcing her marriage like that? What is interesting lie in the context : Sutou ririka is no ordinary idol. (you can also read a more general article about love ban rule here)

Ririka after the sousenkyo. Her T-shirt got sold out soon after.

We have to split our thoughts on two parts : Style and substance. Substance would be “why she did it” and style would be “how she did it”. First of all, people need to know that Shunkan Bunshun, famous tabloid for taking down many idol with scandals, was involved with her announcement. Few weeks before, they were already hinting to make a huge reveal on one of AKB members. It’s now obvious that this idol was none other than Sutou Ririka. We can’t really be sure when they “caught” Riripon dating her boyfriend. But what sure is, she knew she was the target and decided to not give the tabloid the upper hand and announced it in sousenkyo.

Sutou Ririka is quite the eccentric one. She reads a lot of philosophical books, has even wrote one (which was sold out soon after her announcement) and is someone very straightforward, to the point she answered in a showroom (or a stage performance) that she was indeed a virgin. Because such personality is rare, she gained a lot of fans and raised to 20th place in sousenkyo ranking. People implied she wanted to shock people, or was an attention seeker. I don’t think it was her purpose. She just wanted to be honest with fans, as deep inside her she doesn’t think she’s in the wrong doing so. We can quote few Nietzsche quote to grasp a little bit of Riripon’s supposed way of thinking :

“ There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.”

- “ One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star.

-  “Whatever is done for love always occurs beyond good and evil." 

Riripon was most of the time edgy/politically wrong simply because she doesn’t differentiate her as an idol and herself. Stereotypes of an idol would be someone pure, cute and innocent; and many girls created a character to get as close as they could to this definition. But having so much girls reaching the same type of character, it’s actually those who stand out that are getting attention, like riripon. Sutou Ririka is an idol because she is true to herself.

I feel that she is an artist. She’s the kind of person that instead of following rules, she’s creating them. Idol rules were seen as a restriction to her personality. It also come to her perception of love: this is something that goes beyond everything, reason can’t tame feelings. Love doesn’t have to be justified, nor excuse itself to exist.

So in order to reach the bliss, she dived completely into love. One could question how quickly things happened. After her most recent interview, she explained she met him 1.5 years ago but only dated him late 2016, and the proposal was early 2017. Things went really fast, and it cast away the facts that Ririka was trying to be an idol and married at the same time. Actually, Cameron (NMB manager) said they were consulted before everything happened and testify of her sincerity. That’s why they support her until the end of her graduation.

Not only fans, but many 48group members were confused and surprised

Probably what was problematic was the style. By announcing this during sousenkyo, she sank into oblivion everything that happened afterwards, including Mayu’s graduation. She dynamited the sousenkyo, and it’s purpose : to be a special moment between idol and fans. What’s bugging is once again the timing: you can’t help but think what would happen if she didn’t got caught by bunshun. Was she going to continue being an idol despite dating? After all, she accepted being in NMB senbatsu despite dating her boyfriend late 2016. If she was serious about her relationship, she would already decided to withdraw from activities.

The reason comes from substance again : in her interview, she said she worked hard as an idol and still wanted to go to sousenkyo to get her ranking. She pushed her way of thinking so far that she thought that her relationship wouldn’t affect the work she done as an idol to get her ranking. This is her first mistake : Sousenkyo is not a place to drop such a bomb. It was the same situation as Oshima Yuko announcing her sotsugyo in kouhaku : she was criticized because she was shadowing other artist performance because of this. Those who defend the no love ban rule often mistake style and substance. But both are different. Simply put, she has the right to love (substance) but she failed to do it without harming others (style).

We’re not talking about delusional wota who want their oshimen pure and innocent (substance), we’re talking about 48 members (Takayanagi Akane, Oshima Yuko, Takahashi Juri, Okada Nana) who have seen her announcement as inappropriate to those who have tried to rank for many years, or to the kouhai/new members. It is quite unfair to have so many members leave the 48group being punished for being in a relationship and seeing such bold statement from a popular member right during the sousenkyo.

It’s even more irritable because Management are being super ambiguous about this. What the hell, is there a love ban rule or not? To have a flexible love ban rule between unpopular and popular members is unacceptable. Owada Nana and Nishino miki have soon graduated after being caught going out at 2AM with ex johnny’s, but Aki-p offer Ririka to stay? It’s disrespectful to those who try so hard to maintain a good example and self discipline, like Okada Nana. Management can’t claim to damage control what happened when they’ve never fixed a situation that can allow such things.

Friedrich Nietzsche is Riripon’s favourite philosopher

To have Yamamoto Sayaka apologize on behalf of NMB48 for all this ruckus tells pretty much that this situation has gone way beyond Ririka’s only persona. It concerns not only ririka, but NMB image, 48group image, management and fans. She should have taken into account everyone before taking her decision. And because things went so fast because of bunshun, she had no choice but to announce it during sousenkyo. My humble opinion would be that she didn’t act selfishly (she apologized to her senior for troubling the sousenkyo) but it expressed some sort of immaturity to not think the impact of her action to others. She’s young, and to decide to graduate and leave the idol world that she loved in few weeks apart was too difficult. I can understand cameron whe he said Riripon didn’t try to betray fans (and get it both ways).

So probably the biggest culprit would be management (they are too happy to have fan’s attention discarded from the okinawa failure) that let this situation goes on even after being aware of this. I said above that Riripon’s responsability was not engaged from a moral point of view, but i’m not sure many fans would be as apologetic toward riripon as me. What’s scary, is that management allow Riripon to participate in handshake? To face all those probable insult, criticism, all on her own? Isn’t management supposed to protect her? This is quite the ironic situation.

I will never blame her for being human, too human. 

Been Too LOOOOONG!!.... and my fan account of B.A.P Party Boom LA! *it’s LOOOOOONG*

Hello everyone!!! Hope you’re all doing well. Sorry, it’s been so crazy, that I haven’t really been able to do much if anything at all on Tumblr. Things are starting to slow down & I missed ya’ll…. If you still remember me :) I had to catch ya’ll up on what happened. I’ve changed jobs & moved all for the better, much, much happier with all of that, but it’s had me busy!!!!

Ok, so I HAVE to give my fan account of Party Boom LA, most in the chatrooms for @mjupnet already know. So my bestie Hana & I are checking into our hotel Sat around 3pm, I see a black mercedes sprinter van pull up & I tapped her shoulder thinking, could this be B.A.P? But I noticed that on the side it said tours, so I turned back around & told her never mind, as she was checking in. Less than what felt like a min later, I turned back around for kicks & I noticed the 1st person off the sprinter because of his bucket hat, it was BANG YONGGUK!!!!!! So my heart skips & I try to get my friends attention (without looking crazy) she keeps telling me hold on.  she FINALLY turns around & just nods her head & bugs her eyes a bit, but we’re trying SO hard to stay composed! By this point, now Zelo & Himchan have come in, while Yongguk & Jongup stood outside talking, then their manager & about 3 staff come in and stand right behind us for the check in counter. At this time, we haven’t seen Youngjae or Daehyun, but we’re DYING inside B.A.P IS IN OUR HOTEL!!!!! We’re trying to stay calm & not freak out (until we got to our room) The clerk couldn’t take ANY longer than he did, asking us about all of these upgrades!

Himchan, Zelo & 2 of their staff were headed towards the elevator, at the same point that we had to go up as well, but I was tooooo chicken to take the same elevator, sadly (what a fail) Hana still picks on me for this! I’m pretty sure if it was Yongguk & Jongup, I would’ve no hesitation, but they were still outside talking. We go to our room & SCREAM freaking out that we’re in the same hotel. There was a pool party & we raced to change & go chill, hoping that B.A.P would also be there. In the elevator, some of who we later learner where their staff were in their too & asked where we were going, we spoke of the pool party & they said they wished they could join, we told them they should, but they had to take care of some things for a special event the next day (we knew what it was ^_^) so we REALLY thought B.A.P would be there now. We lounged, the DJ was awesome, tons of ppl were there, but NO B.A.P, but we made an agreement, that since we fly to LA, this isn’t just for B.A.P, but also for us to have a vacation! SO we still enjoyed ourselves, had a yummy cocktail & then decided to go eat after about 2.5hrs. We head out to valet to get our rental car & as we’re sitting there, Youngjae walks right past us, I tapped Hana and then we see a few staff, there all headed to their van parked on the side. Then my eyes were blessed, Jongup walks past, a few times actually! it was pretty funny, he seemed so lost, yet adorable! I think after the 3rd time, I giggled, so he looked over, then smiled & waved. LOL! Hana had to go in & ask how late the pool & office would stay open, when she turned around, Himchan was just sitting in the lobby. So she greeted him in Korean, told him that we’d be at their concert the next night & hope they enjoyed their time & get to relax. He thanked her & was so kind, even when he walked out the door he greeted me & said thank you. Out walked Jongup again yelling HYUNG!! and Himchan happily waited for Jongup to catch up.

We were hoping our car would take longer, as Yongguk & Daehyun hadn’t come out. But NOPE, our car came & we didn’t want to just sit there, as we had to get food, etc… So as we drove off we waved & they waved back. We finished up what we were doing, came back changed again to go out at night, the lobby turns into a cool lounge w/ an awesome dj! So we chilled there, but my friend loves AOMG, and was like Bound LA is lit, we need to try that out & we can always come back. As we finished up our drink we were walking out, I see this guy sitting on the lounge chair & I said to Hana, wow, now HE’S beautiful, he looks up & smiles & it’s JUNG DAEHYUN, I wanted to die, but just smiled, but my heald down & walk faster to Bound LA (popular Korean club) But was annoyed, thinking he was going to chill in the lounge & possibly w/ other members… ie Yongguk & Jongup. But Hana was like I REALLY want to go & we can always come back. Well, thanks to coachella, what usually is LIT was not at all, there were probably 10ppl ttl inside. But we were like, more dance floor for us, met some cool ppl, had a drink & then decided after more dancing we’d leave & head back. We decided on another drink, as the bartender was really good & were just chilling there enjoying the music, Hana was facing the door & my back was towards it, but I saw her face & I knew….. we weren’t alone. Himchan, Jongup, Daehyun & Yongguk walk in & immediately go to a booth, they were probably as shocked as we were w/ how empty it was! But we knew then, WE WERE NOT LEAVING!!!!!! So we went back on the dance floor, now with about 5 other ppl & just had fun, not caring who was watching, (it’s was so empty, it was hard not to notice, but we ust had fun) But soon we once again got hungry, haha & after a few hours left & headed to BCD tofu house. We changed into comfy clothes, were chilling there & in walks Daehyun & their manager. A few min later Jongup and another staff member, no Yongguk or Himchan. And they were seated 1 table away, behind us on the right. because of a couple guys near us getting a little annoying, their Manager positioned himself to see & watch us (so nice) and made eyes w/ Hana (she was facing them) to make sure we were ok. They also alerted the waiters as well that were helping us all. The night calmed down & soon they left and us about 30 min later. 

By this point, if you’ve even read to this point, you’re wondering why we haven’t approached them more. Well, there were girls that stayed at our hotel ALL DAY for a glimpse of them. We didn’t want to be clumped into that group as those type of fans, in fact if we got stopped by some to ask if we saw them, we’d give opposite directions! Some of the staff (we didn’t know at the time) we’re in the elevator & some young girls asked if we’ve seen B.A.P… We told them, no (even thought we had JUST saw Himchan walk in) Soon we heard thank you, turned around & it was their staff, appreciative of how we handled it, we explained while we’re fans, we want them to enjoy & relax, they seemed shocked! 

Ok, so on to Sunday, still reading? almost done…. We assumed the boys were doing soundcheck in the am, blah blah blah & decided to just do our thing per usual, I was craving neng myun & we went to our fav place, as we waited for the car Himchan & one of the photographers walked up from getting juice (nope, not coffee) At this pt, we’ve bumped into him the most, Jongup 2nd, Daehyun 3rd Yongguk 4th, And only 1 time saw Youngjae and Zelo when we 1st checked in. Zelo had posted the brunch at our hotel & we assumed after that they left. We came back to the hotel after eating, changed & decided to chill by the pool. Hana wanted to in the sun & I wanted to chill in the shade, so I laid on the chairs. The music was really chill, had a nice summer vibe going (pineapple vodka in my hand) I was grooving & then an old school song came on & ppl starting reacting. In particular, me & a guy next to me, so we looked at each other & smiled, I kept my cool, but that guy was ZELO!!! I smiled back and laid back down, then texted my friend saying Zelo was 2 chairs away from me, so she made her way over! LOL but we still left him alone, he had 1 staff member with him, it was their translator for the US leg of the tour. We just wanted him to enjoy, so we left him alone.Even at one pt, his staff left & Zelo was just by himself about ½ hr, we almost felt protective of him, HE IS A PRECIOUS GUMDROP and sooo adorable, tall 7 very pale, ppl they are NOT whitewashing him…. the others, YES!!!. We did get to meet Yongguk, Himchan & Jongup last year, we even got to talk a bit more to them then honestly.    While we didn’t get a photo w/them, this meant the world to both of us, we saw them & saw them A LOT, but as THEMSELVES, not B.A.P! Let me tell you, They’re beyond beautiful w/out makeup & beyond nice, they also were very appreciative with how we let them be & even shielded them from some fans. But I think they thought we really weren’t fans, since we didn’t “act” like normal ones….. so when High touch came & we were in the last 10ppl to do high touch, the look on their faces… O_O…  & their reactions PRICELESS… We knew, they knew then we were fans & it all clicked! They wen’t to another spot for dinner after the concert & left in the afternoon the next day (Mon, we left Tues)they actually did late check out, due to the amount of fans waiting in the lobby :(.. and just probably tired. 

This was a trip we’ll NEVER forget & I hope they’ll remember it as fondly was we do & that we get to see them again next year!!!

IF you read this, you deserve a medal!!!! <3

anonymous asked:

Would you mind explaining why you see Ouma as "definitely, undeniably confirmed gay"? The only evidence I know of is him saying he "likes" Saihara after he leaves the VR world, but that's in the context of strangling people to keep their eyes on him, which may be a dark joke about Miu's death. Additionally, I've been told the word he uses could also mean "interested in/fascinated with" as well as "like". Could you clarify? Thank you!

Ouma is confirmed gay because his line about Saihara is pretty undeniably romantically inclined, regardless of context. It’s also completely unskippable in the plot. Unlike bonus mode content such as the RPG or love hotel scenes, or even FTEs which are also optional, Ouma’s interest in Saihara comes up canonically in Chapter 4 no matter what the player does.

It’s also something he says on screen without anyone else around, even Saihara himself. Without any other characters around to listen in, there was no point of the scene other than to illuminate the fact that Ouma was clearly interested in Saihara beyond the point of just “casual” or “friendly” interest. 

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Let's get away

Summary - His smile has never looked so gradient before. Chanyeol has always looked alive, but now he looks like he’s living.

Originally posted by beautyeol

A/N - Just something I came up with while listening to a bunch of Halsey songs.

Reader x Chanyeol


Word Count - 1,988

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anonymous asked:

Hai!!! So first I wanna say how much I love your blog like seriously please never stop. Second can you pretty please with them erwin nudies ontop do Eren, Armin and Mikasa headcanons (separately) with a cute and soft s/o?? Thank you sooo much!!!

+ Super duper protective over his soft s/o.
+ He always seems to have his s/o close to his body, massing their scalp with his fingertips.
+ Always whispering sweet things into their ear about how cute they are.
+ Kisses 24/7.

Originally posted by youtubersandothers


+ Reading and telling stories to his s/o.
+ Interlocking fingers when holding hands. Also pinky holding.
+ Late night talks that turn into midnight adventures.

Originally posted by perfectfeelings

+ She’s very content with just hearing her s/o speak. She’s a good listener.
+ Not jealous, but she’s the protective type of girlfriend.
+ Always trying to go above and beyond for her s/o.
+ Hugs hugs hugs

Originally posted by isiyamor