Before it gets to midnight! I’ve been working and it just occurred to me that I ought to do this. Day 23 of BelieveInRecovery's 30-day recovery challenge!
Today’s prompt asks how I’d deal if my future child had PTSD. Well, I believe I would prevent it at all cost by being involved in his or her education, PTA meetings, advocacy. I would also see to it that my home is a safe environment and my child is comfortable talking to me and won’t be scared if s/he has to come home and say, “Mom, my teacher hit me today.” I couldn’t do that because I didn’t have the social strength, I guess. But if for some reason somebody fucks up my kid, I will…do basically what my mom does because it’s kept me alive since about fourth grade when I started getting suicidal, but I would also go to court. I would spend the time and energy making sure that this doesn’t happen again to anybody else. It’s too late for me to file a grievance or something because I’m long, long gone. If someone at my kid’s school pulled anything like what my public school teachers did, I’d give them hell. This cannot happen again to anyone, and I will do everything in my power to prevent it.
But what would I say to my kid? That’s the second part of my question. I don’t know, it depends on the situation and circumstance. I guess the usual motivating stuff I say to my friends if s/he’s not too upset to need some nurturing, like, “If I can do it for x amount of time, so can you!” and “You’re good enough, you’re smart enough, and doggone it, people like you!” But if s/he’s in a crisis or something, my future kid can count on me to drop everything to help because I might just save her life. Usually when I’m helping people who are really upset and crying, I make it up as I go along. Sometimes being quiet, holding their hand and rubbing their back with their permission just lets them know that they’re safe and loved. I believe in myself. I haven’t fucked anyone up yet and I’ve been working with children for a really long time, so I think my future is bright.