also harry is still a pillow

tangled up in you 45k

by missandrogyny (paynner on tumblr) 

Harry blinks once. And blinks again. And says, his voice dangerous: “Niall, did you get me a mail-order bride?”

Because what the actual fuck. It kind of looks like Niall’s just purchased a person. For Harry.

Niall blinks back at him for a few moments, before throwing his head back and howling with laughter. Harry throws a pillow at him. Hard. “No, what the fuck, Harry.”

“A prostitute then?” Harry also doesn’t want a prostitute.

“Of course not!”

“A stripper?”

“No!”

Damn, he’s running out of ideas. He settles for launching another pillow at Niall’s head. Niall bats it away easily, still laughing. “Stop!”

“What did you get me, then?!” Niall must hear the tinge of hysteria in his voice, because he’s pulling himself together, trying to stop himself from laughing.

There’s still a big grin on his face, though, when he says, “I got you a professional cuddler.”

A professional…what. “What?”

Harry Potter can’t sleep (and neither can Draco Malfoy)

prompt: pillow covers (thanks @miniemcgee)
<5k

Fuck this, Harry thinks, listening to the rustle of Malfoy’s sheets as the insufferable git rolls over for what has to be the fifth time in as many minutes. And fuck McGonagall for assigning Draco Malfoy, of all people, to be his roommate. No wait, Harry immediately takes this back. Even in his internal monologue he isn’t comfortable disrespecting McGonagall.

Still Malfoy is a nightmare to dorm with. Merlin, Harry would much rather be having a nightmare – at least then he’d actually be sleeping! Malfoy tosses and turns all night. He gets up and visits the bathroom two-three times every night. What, does he have a bladder the size of a peanut? It’s ridiculous.

All Harry wants is to sleep. All Malfoy seems to do every night is make as much noise as possible. Harry mentions it to Ron once at breakfast. Even though all the eight years have been given new shared “houseless” dorms, thankfully they’re still allowed to sit at their house tables. Harry is incredibly grateful for this. It’s bad enough staying awake all night listening to Malfoy, he’d hate to have to put up with him in the daylight as well.

“What the bloody hell are you talking about?” Ron asks.

“He makes noises, Ron, in his bed. All night!” Harry explains, desperate for someone to understand his frustration. It’s constant, night after night. Rustle rustle rustle.

Ron looks at Harry like he’s lost his mind, a faint blush on his cheeks. Harry doesn’t bring it up again.


Draco is tired. So very tired. He can’t remember ever not feeling tired. It’s been so long since he’s been able to really sleep. At least two years, maybe more. Probably more. He thought things would change after the Battle of Hogwarts. That Voldemort’s death would give him peace. But it hasn’t. Nothing seems to. He doubts anything ever will.

Every night it’s the same. He lies in bed desperately willing himself to sleep, for his body to give in and relax. But the relaxation never comes. Sure he gets bits of rest here and there but it’s always fleeting, never enough. The morning takes a lifetime to arrive and yet, somehow, it’s always too soon.

Tonight he studies late in the library. He pushes himself to remain for as long as possible. What’s the point in going to bed anyway? Finally the exhaustion becomes too much for him and he heads back to the dorm, all the while knowing the exhaustion isn’t enough to grant him sleep. It never is.

His dorm is dark. Potter must already be in bed. He is surprised by how early all the eighth years go to bed. In Slytherin lights out was always well after midnight. Unfortunately, not many others from Slytherin have returned to Hogwarts to back him up on this. So everyone seems to retire by 10pm every night.

He stumbles around the dark room, trying to be quiet, his arm reaching out in front of him searching for his bed pole to grasp, while his eyes adjust. There. Using the bed post as a guide, he lets himself fall into bed.

Ah. His body crumples inwards, pleased. It takes all Draco’s determination to keep his body upright throughout the day when all he wants to do is collapse. His body craves for sleep all day and then when he finally gets to bed, nothing. Yet another restless night.

Except today something feels different. His pillow is softer somehow, his blanket warmer. There’s something else too.  A strong, commanding scent he’s never noticed before. He breathes in deeply and lets it wash over him. Grapefruit. Honey. Ginger. It’s comforting. And familiar. He takes another breath. And another. His eyes close.

Keep reading

Harry Styles - “Confessions” Part Four


Alright… there’s gonna be a part 5. But, let’s do this! Part four of the ‘Confessions’ series!! Hope you guys like this one as much as you’ve liked the others. Let me know! It’s a touch happier … or is iiiiit?

Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Five


Harry groaned as he awoke, the sunlight poured down on him and he felt a layer of sweat on his forehead from the light as well the body pressed into his. When he lifted his head, finding that it rested on the back of his couch instead of his pillow, he had a moment of confusion before he remembered. You being curled up in his arms, still fast asleep against his chest, also helped jog his memory. 

It took him a moment to realize what had woken him but he quickly realized it was his phone buzzing in his pocket. He knew there was no way to pull it out and answer it without waking you so he let it continue until finally it stopped. Harry sighed, taking in a deep breath as he rest his head on top of yours, his cheek resting against your soft and sweet smelling hair. 

He was just starting to drift off back into his nap when his phone began going off again. Apparently whoever was calling him really needed to have a chat. He opened his eyes and sighed, wondering how he could possibly do this. He didn’t want to wake you but it seemed whoever was ringing him wasn’t going to give up. He shifted a bit to the side until eventually he was able to slide out from under you, helping you lay back gently onto the couch, thankfully still fast asleep. 

He didn’t even care about the phone call in that moment as he stared down at your slumbering and peaceful face. All he had seen the last while was pain and heartache but now it was all gone, just for a little bit at least. He couldn’t help as he leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to the corner of your mouth, bringing a large and ringed hand up to brush a few hairs off of your face. The moment was then ruined by the phone once again going off. He knew he had no choice now but to take it.

When he left the living room, heading down the hall towards the kitchen, he pulled the phone out and felt his heart rate increase when he saw his mom’s name and face flashing across his screen. Why would she be calling him so many times? He hadn’t told her what was going on, he told his sister as he had gone to stay with her the night he had told you but she had sworn not to tell their mother. 

“Mum?” He questioned, answering the phone finally, as he opens the back door in the kitchen and steps out onto the back porch. “Is everythin’ alrigh’?” He questions as he leans against the railing of the deck, running his fingers over the hard wood. 

“You tell me, Harry.” Came her reply. No hello, no greeting, no asking how he was. Yeah, Harry knew in that moment that she had definitely found out. 

“Did Gem tell you, then?” He mutters, hoping it was from his sister and not that the media had gotten wind of the situation. Even with both parties involved having signed an NDA, which he hated having to see your face as you had to agree not to talk about how he knocked up a girl, these things could still get out and he dreaded the moment that they did. 

“She shouldn’ have had to, Harold, why haven’ you come to me abou’ all of this?” Harry sighed, hanging his head, unsure of how to answer. The truth was that he was afraid of his mothers disappointment. He felt he had made her so proud up until now and what a way to ruin that than with a situation like this. He had already broken the heart of one important girl in his life, he couldn’t handle doing it to another one just yet. “So it’s true then? You got a girl pregnant?” 

“Yes, mum.” Harry mutters, running a hand through his hair before his fingers begin to play nervously with his bottom lip. “Well, I go soon to have a paternity tes’ done, bu’ as of now we are almos’ certain tha’ I am the fathe’,” 

“And Y/N left you?” Harry hadn’t spoken to his sister since before he left for LA so of course she wouldn’t know that you had for some reason agreed to join him on this little adventure. “The one girl who could handle your lifestyle, put up with everything she’s had to, and you go and do this to her.” That was exactly what Harry hadn’t wanted said to him. He already knew all of this but to hear that disappointment, the disbelief, in his own mothers voice hurt almost as much as he imagined it would. 

“She’s here in Los Angeles with me.” His mother was silent on the other end. “We broke up, yes, bu’ she knew…” He sighs. “I don’ deserve her to, bu’ she came to help me through this.” He hears his mothers answering sigh as she took this information in. 

“Wha’ are you going to do, Harry?” Her voice was full of concern now. She had gotten out her reprimanding and now it was time to make sure her son was okay. No matter how upset with him she was, he was her son and she would support him through this. 

“I don’ know, mum.” Harry had done so well at keeping the tears at bay but in that moment he broke again. The tears fell a few at a time down his stubble covered cheeks, his green eyes shining as he hung his head, resting it on his arm that was supporting his weight on the rail of the deck. 

“Oh, Harry.” She sighed, picking up on the brokenness of her son on the other end of the phone. 

“I can’ do this,” He turns and takes a few steps over to a deck chair, falling into it as he wipes at his wet cheeks and stares off across his green lawn before he closes his eyes, resting his head against he back of the chair. “Wha’ do I do, mum?” His voice was so quiet as he begged him mother to help him through this even though he knew that she couldn’t. No one could. 

“We will take this one day at a time, love, okay?” She offers, her voice calm and reassuring. “I’ll fly out there as soon as I can.” 

“No, mum, you don’t have to do tha’.” Though as soon as she had offered, Harry knew he needed her to. He needed that motherly hug, that parental guidance as he began to navigate his own way into potential parenthood. 

“Too late, I’m lookin’ at flights now.” She argued and Harry knew it was a lost cause - not that he would fight hard for her not to come anyway. “You and Y/N need someone to help you through this.” 

“Thank you.” Harry didn’t even have to say it as more than a whisper but Anne picked up on his gratitude fully anyway. 

“How is she doing? Y/N?” As Harry thought back to you, fast asleep and peaceful inside, he had to bite at his lower lip to keep the tears from falling again but when he opened his mouth to speak nothing but a jumbled mess of words came out. 

“She’s.. I.. i-i mean..” And then a small, quiet sob fell from his mouth and Anne sighed. “She’s never goin’ to forgive me, mum. I’ve lost her.” He squeezes the bridge of his nose between his fingers as he looks down at his feet, more tears leaking down his damp cheeks. He didn’t even try to wipe them away now. It would be pointless as his eyes were burning with fresh tears, surely not stopping any time soon.

“Harry, love, true love always finds a way.” 

“Mum, this isn’t some romantic movie. This isn’t going to jus’ resolve itself and everyone is goin’ to be all happy in the end. I fucked up, cheated on the most importan’ person in my life, lied to her about i’ and only told her when I had to because I found ou’ I had gotten the girl I cheated with pregnant. Would you forgive Robin if he did tha’?” Anne was silent and Harry knew it was because she knew he was right. “No matter how much her and I love each other, this is i’. She won’ forgive me and I’m tryin’ to come to terms with tha’.” But with the tears still falling down his cheeks he knew he was no where near close, if he ever really would be. 

Just then, Harry turns as the back door opens and out you step. You had woken moments before to find Harry gone but heard his voice outside and came to see where he had gone off to. You had heard what he’d just said and he watches you as you walk across the deck and comes to take a seat beside him. 

“Your mum?” You ask, gesturing towards the phone. Harry gives a nod, simply watching you, trying to see if you were going to say anything more but you don’t so he looks away and sighs. 

“I should probably go, bu’ le’ me know when you’ll be here and I’ll le’ you know about the paternity test.” He says to his mother who takes a deep breath on the other end of the line, still full of concern for her son but now that she had heard your voice on the other line knew he would talk no more about the situation. 

“I will, Harry. I love you.” Harry couldn’t help but smile. Even so much as his mothers voice made him feel better, knowing that she still loved him after he fucked up like this helped a lot. He only wished he could hear those three words from the girl sitting beside him. 

“Love you too, mum.” 

“Give Y/N my love as well. Bye now, darling.” With that, his mother ends the call and Harry sighs as he puts the phone down on the seat behind him and looks over at you, finally wiping at his damp cheeks. 

“Mum sends her love.” He mutters. You can’t help but smile, biting at your lower lip. “She’s comin’ out here. Gemma told her abou’ all of this and she said she wan’s to help up through this.” 

“That is very sweet of her.” And not shocking at all. Anne had always been the best support system you and Harry had in your relationship. She would listen to you both, helped you through tough times and much to your benefit told Harry when he was being an idiot. “You hungry?” You eventually ask after it was silent between the two of you for a few moments. 

“Always.” He answers, looking over at you as you smile a bit. He returns it, one corner of his mouth upturned in a genuine grin. 

“Let’s go out to eat. Somewhere nice where we can just enjoy some good food, strong drinks and .. nice company.” You lean over, nudging him a bit with your shoulder. 

“Sounds much bette’ than sittin’ here all nigh’ bein’ sad.” Harry responds and you agreed, which is why you had suggested it. There was only so much more silence you could take before it drove you more insane than you already felt. 

“Hear anything about going to do the test?” You wonder later in the night after a nice meal at a restaurant the two of you had gone to many times on many dates in the past. It had exactly what you wanted, good food, good drinks and great privacy. 

“He sen’ me an email while we were eatin’.” Harry responds, shrugging a bit as he drives back towards the house with you in the passenger seat beside him. “It’s tomorrow mornin’.” 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” You questioned but thinking about it, you knew why. The two of you had been having such a lovely evening. He didn’t want to ruin it by talking about anymore of this baby stuff. The two of you had shared jokes, laughs, and stories. Even 4 years together you could always find stories to tell one another and Harry was happy to see that they could still do that. Maybe there was hope after all. 

“Didn’ wanna bring it up.” He answered, focusing on the road before him. “You don’ have to go with me. It is gonna jus’ be quick, he said.” 

“Are you sure? I don’t mind.” You would prefer not to, of course, but you had come to support Harry so you would go if he needed you to. 

“I’ll be alrigh’.” He smiles over at you and reaches over, resting his large hand on your leg for a second. When he goes to pull away, you grab for his fingers, tangling yours with his. You just needed to feel his skin on yours, those long fingers between yours, their warmth, the coolness of his rings. He looks over at you, a small crease between his brows but he gives you a smile, mimicking the one you were giving him. 

“What do you they even do for this test? I mean.. what kind of test is it?” You had been wondering that ever since the lawyer had brought it up in the meeting earlier this morning. How did they go about testing if Harry’s DNA matched this baby’s when it was still in that woman’s stomach? 

“He sent me a bi’ of information on it bu’ it seems like they jus’ take my blood and her’s. The baby’s DNA is in her blood now and so they can see test it if it matches mine.” He explains. “It’s all very scientific.” You give a small laugh but were stunned by this information. You had no idea paternity could be tested like that. It was a bit fascinating, actually. 

“So you don’t want me to come hold your hand while they stick you with a needle.” You jokingly ask, pinching the back of his hand a bit. He laughs and shakes his head. He then has to release your hand as he needs two hands to pull into the driveway, pulling into the garage. 

“I think I’ll manage just fine.” You give him a grin before sliding from the vehicle and the two of you head inside. “Oh, my mum jus’ sent me her fligh’ details.” He tells you as the two of you go to collapse on the couch and he pulls out his phone. “She ge’s here tomorrow nigh’.” 

“Oh, good. It will be nice to have her here.” You sigh then, pulling your legs up to your chest and bite at your lip. 

“You alrigh’?” Harry questions, tossing his phone down beside him and leans back against the couch, looking over at you. You look over at him, resting your cheek against your knees. 

“I just feel tired, no matter how much I sleep. I feel like I just got done running a marathon. I could sleep for like a year.” Just to add on to your words, a yawn manages to escape your lips. Harry gives a small laugh, taking in how adorable you were. He resisted the urge to wrap his arms around you and cuddle you. 

“You can go take another nap. Don’ le’ me stop you.” He gestures towards the hallway but you smile and shake your head, uncurling your legs and you let out a sigh. The room fell silent then, neither of you saying anything, just staring at the wall in front of you both. 

Your heart pounded in your chest as you thought about how close he was to you, and for some reason in that moment you felt the urge to kiss him. You missed the feel of his lips on yours, the way his body surrounded you, the feel of his touch - gentle and warm. It had been so hard to be so close to him the last few days, no matter how mad at him, or how hurt and heartbroken you were, there had always been that draw towards the man beside you and it was back in full force in that moment. 

“Hey, Harry?” You end up saying, not looking over at him, continuing to keep your eyes fixed on the wall but you see out of the corner of your eye as he looks over at you. 

“Yes, love?” He questions, curious at what you were about to say. He was picking up slightly on your anxiousness and wondered what it all of a sudden could be about when things had been fine just a second beforehand. But you didn’t know what to say. You couldn’t get any words out though. So, you decide to shut off your brain from thinking logically, you instead just gave in to the feelings coursing through you and ignored the way your head was screaming at you. 

You instead listened to your heart in that moment, the part of your heart that adored the man beside you, that was completely in love with him and leaned over quickly, not giving yourself enough time to back out and pressed your lips to his. 

He gasps a bit against your lips but quickly kisses you back, his fingers coming up to tangle in your hair. You rest a hand on his cheek, the other on his chest as you lean into his chest. He turns towards you a bit more, bringing his other hand up to your waist, pulling you a bit closer. The feel of his lips on yours, the pressure they left on you, the buzzing in your chest, you felt alive for the first time in weeks and for once weren’t thinking about the entire situation. In that moment the baby didn’t matter, the cheating didn’t matter. You loved this man, you didn’t forgive him, but both of you were so emotionally unstable right now, you needed this. 

You soon pull away from him, both of you breathing deeply. Harry was feeling this pang in his chest, butterflies in his stomach, even. He was feeling the best he had in so long, he missed your touch, your kiss, so badly and here they were again, back on his. He didn’t know what that meant but as he pulled you back in for another kiss, he just didn’t care. This could be your last kiss ever and he would be okay with how perfect it was. Nothing ever gave him that happiness, that soaring feeling, that sense of completeness like your kiss. 

“I love you.” You pull back and whisper, looking into those green eyes of his that you loved so much. You just had to say it, even if it was just for one last time. 

“I love you, too, sweetheart.” Harry gave you a small smile. He knew this most likely didn’t mean the two of you were okay again, he knew you were far from that, but he wasn’t going to complain about your sudden affection towards him. He would take this over crying and arguing any day. You give him one last smile before pulling back completely. 

“I’m going to go take a bath and then probably get in bed, maybe read a little and call it an early night.” You tell him, pushing your fingers through your hair. 

“Want some company?” Harry offers, completely joking though would of course do it if you were up for it but you laugh and smack playfully at his chest. “Goodnight, love.” He reaches over, pressing a gentle kiss to your temple. 

“Good luck tomorrow morning, don’t let them hurt you too much with that needle.” You say as you stand up, making your way across the room. 

“I’ll try.” You both exchange grins before you leave the room. That night, later, as you lay awake all you kept thinking about was the feel of his lips on yours once more. And for the first time in weeks, none of all this mess mattered and you finally were able to fall asleep with a smile on your face. 

halcyongrl  asked:

Can you give me a tcc history lesson?? Like what the fuck is up with ericfuckingharris?

sit down kids and let vlad the dad tell y'all a brief history of some of the most famous shit to go down in the tcc.

• so, ericfuckingharris was a guy in the tcc around the middle of last year. of course, given there’s only 4 and a half boys in the tcc, girls were swarming all over him because he was a “hot guy”. or so these thots fucking thought. anyway, he gains a little fanbase of the thirsty girls in the tcc wanting to suck up to him, and everyone is worshipping him because he was a guy who was into all that kinky bdsm type of stuff. the girls went crazy, people either loved or hated him, but he was so popular because he was handsome and wanted to be called “reb”. basically eric harris wannabe. so, you may be asking, what the fuck even happened? turns out this guy was a fake, and the pictures he was using was of some (schottish?) instagram dude. this community was set a-fucking-blaze when this shit was discovered. the girls who were riding his dick were crying, people were saying “i told y'all so”, others were just shaking their fucking heads. you can search the “ericfuckingharris” tag on here and there’s still remnants of this train wreck.

• now let’s talk about the dylan klebold pillow ordeal, which i can’t believe some of y'all haven’t seen. a severely mentally ill girl by the url imagines4columbiners made a post about how she stole her mothers debit card to purchase a pillow case with dylan klebold on it. not even a real image of him, some weird ass drawing someone did of dylan and put it up on redbubble. she proceeds to say how she was going to fuck the pillow, but her mom got to the mail first and shipped it back. she said it was our fault and that we won, we got what we wanted. she was also posting pics of her feet for dylan klebold, and made a drawing of rachel scott being forced to give dylan a blowjob during the massacre. she also wrote a fic about eric raping dylan, and as you can already conclude the community was set ablaze again. i personally talked to her because i just couldn’t believe she was actually like this for no reason, and that’s when i got to know her. she’s 16, and she suffers from schizophrenia among many other mental illnesses. so i befriended her, i encouraged her to seek help and to leave the tcc because she really didn’t belong here after what she did, and really she was an all around nice kid but she had severe mental illness. people were pissed at me because i took the time to ask her what the fuck was wrong with her, but so be it. she’s getting professional help now and i know she’s on medication. last i talked to her she was on her way to a psych ward, so there’s that. anyway, it was fucking crazy from start to finish. search my blog for “imagines4columbiners” to see more.

• the time lynn ann (or a fake, still not sure) made a tumblr. y'all gotta know who she is. if not, google “lynn ann eric harris” and feel free to call a suicide prevention line afterwards. basically lynn ann was (probably still is) obsessed with eric harris. she’s severely mentally ill too, and she has a facebook as well as a youtube channel where she worships eric. okay, whatever, but she also goes on to bully the people who died that day. she’ll call them ugly, fat, retarded, ni**er, etc. she just spews the nastiest shit ever towards the victims. she has a pillow (like a big ass pillow) with a picture of eric harris on it. she also has a cup her brother got her, posters, etc. all over her room and she shows off her collection on youtube. view at your own risk.

• v-reb, that little shit. basically he’s a disgusting bigot. not only that, but because of him there was a nationwide panic over a shooter in australia. someone sent him some anons about how they were going to kill the people in their school, which was in australia. they had plans, where they were going to place the bombs, and how they were going to gun down the survivors. and what did v-reb do? laugh and encourage them to do so. then as if that wasn’t bad enough, that same anon, as well as others, went around to other blogs and told people the same shit. some anon said “be prepared for tomorrow, none of you will be laughing then.” or something like that. so basically, @v-reb encouraged a mass shooting, more and more people got the same anons, people were in a panic and everyone was scrambling to get the word out to the people in australia to stay home and stay safe because whoever it was sounded deadass serious. we contacted authorities, we managed to pinpoint someone who we believed was behind the threats, and now things have settled. i’ve gotten asks about how the schools in australia were on lockdown, how people were scared, etc. and v-reb continued to laugh and think it was all a joke and that it was funny. this kid is fucking sick and really i never wanted to beat someones ass so bad. take him as an example of what happens when you don’t beat your kids a few good times. ALSO here’s an update on @v-reb. they encouraged another shooting in england from some mentally ill boy who suffered a lot of trauma and abuse instead of encouraging them to get help. at this point they either get off on making this shit happen or they’re extremely fucking sick, so avoid this idiot at all costs. did i mention he’s only 15? yeah avoid him especially if you’re mentally i’ll because he’ll take advantage of that and try and encourage you to kill yourself or others.

• okay so @pledgeallegiance. this son of a bitch is literally always dragging people and shit. like will he ever stop? no. he literally just waits for some bigot to say some stupid shit and he’ll just have to drag them. it never fucking ends. also he claimed the title as the first ever black roofie in 2015 and wow???? he hates (most) roofies but he actually would know more about the case than most because he’s been following it since literally day one. but would anybody want to know from him bc he keeps dragging ppl? probably not. have you ever seen a black nazi? look no further. like what the fuck is even happening. his blog is supposed to be true crime but all i see is him roasting racists, reblogging gifs of avenged sevenfold, and riding the dick of dwayne stafford. literally the most cringeworthy person in the tcc hands down. also he roasts nazi’s and yet??? his friends call him black hitler like literally what the fuck is he doing anymore. no one knows what the fuck he’s doing anymore but he keeps getting followers.

• @whitepowercockkk. do not get me fucking started. this is a 61 year old man on here. he’s a neo nazi. swastika tattooed on his left tit, white supremacist through and through. he’s a columbiner, and his blog is filled with him praising eric and dylan as the “gods of columbine”, belittling the victims (similar to lynn ann), and making videos/edits showing his white supremacy and love for eric and dylan. he’s a methhead, that you can tell because he posts about shooting up and stuff. he’s also gay, and posts nudes with a swastika on his dick. so. if you look on his blog, you’ll see his videos, he’s there on camera smoking like a chimney and talking about eric and dylan and nazism. you know liz taylor from american horror story? he literally looks like her. no joke i think his blog is still up so go take a look if you’re brave. let’s not forget that he has a grey shirt and written in red are the words “i condone.” listen. listen. listen he’s like every edgelord on here wrapped into one. this is what happens when you don’t grow out of your nazi and columbiner phase after 18.

• OH GOD THE COSPLAYERS. listen. there’s people on here who, on april 20th, usually like to celebrate the massacre. they will dress up as eric and dylan with their friends, wear the shirts and the coats and the glasses and shit, and they’ll go to school dressed like that and take selfies and videos. two people from russia did this and they posed like eric and dylan in the suicide photo in their school library and just had someone take the picture. i am done.

• okay so now, to wrap it up, what the fuck happened today. now i’m not pissed or judging, but apparently some girls who call themselves the “roofiesquad”???? i dunno. apparently they were in a group chat, and they got an idea. they would make a fake tumblr, kinda like ericfuckingharris but with a twist. they made a fake tumblr, the fake person was a 17 year old boy, and they took someones pic off instagram and posted it. they were doing some sort of experiment??? and they wanted to see what would happen. so i think they did this for a day, and they said that in that day 50+ people followed that fake blog and a lot of thirsty ass girls tried messaging the fake guy. they said they wanted to see how gullible the girls in this community are and how they just swarm towards any guy in the tcc, so they decided to make this fake person, get a bunch of teens to jump all over it, and then posted about how it was all fake. i don’t know what the hell happened, but i’m pretty sure a bunch of girls here got humiliated and their feelings hurt because they hopped on the nearest dick they could find in the tcc.

so that basically sums up a good portion of the crazy shit that has happened in the tcc, there’s probably tons more but this is all i can remember off the top of my head

john laurens. knows swear words in like ten different languages. freckles. his entire face lights up when he laughs. always talking, no matter who’s in the room. the mastermind behind all pranks; he finds loopholes and makes plans, then smooth-talks them all out of trouble. only drinks three things; water, orange juice and sam adams beer. constantly cold despite his multiple layers of clothing. insomniac. really likes showers. gentle, kind, compassionate; but also, devious, snarky, stubborn. science connoisseur. loves taking pictures of the hamilsquad doing simple things. flirts with everyone and everything when he’s drunk. so, so grateful for his best friends. always playing old music on his record-player in the dorm. perfectly okay with being unnoticed, as long as he still has his friends at his side. gets bored easily when watching movies, unless it’s star wars or harry potter. curls around the closest pillow or person when he’s asleep. couldn’t care less if his shirt is buttoned or if his tie is straight, and never bothers to retie his shoelaces. always gives meaningful, personal gifts. has a sense of domesticity about him; he can make a foreign room seem like home. too preoccupied to tidy up after himself, so the area around his bed is always cluttered and disorganized. when he gets an idea or is brainstorming, his mind moves a million miles an hour and its impossible to stop him. the most articulate of the group; he could make the simplest sentence sound like poetry. really good at drawing, but doesn’t usually do it. loves biology, especially if it’s marine biology. can’t even bother with physics, though. content in silence, but he finds it strange when he can’t hear his best friends arguing over something in the background. tries to notice every little thing, even if it’s just the way his friend’s eyes look just a little brighter when they laugh.

alexander 

Okay so i love deledier as much as the next person BU T WE NEED TO CONSIDER DELE/WINKSY AND LEMME TELL YOU WHY

-height difference. winksy always having to get on his tiptoes to kiss dele. dele holding stuff above his head so winksy cant reach. having to always ask dele to reach the honey from the top cupboard and pouting when he makes a joke about it

-they knew each other way back from internationals. i mean do i need to remind you of that photo???? (you’re welcome)

-the fact winksy calls him del. cute nicknames all around. he probably does it in public to annoy dele and he gets super embarrassed and tells him to shut up

-winksy protecting his angry tol man from getting in fights all the time. even though hes almost half a foot smaller. still got to protect his angry puppy

Originally posted by spurs-at-the-lane

-they always have to be together. just watch the videos. if winksy isnt beside his man? he gotta move his ass so he is.

-they’re both still children, i mean just look at this. they probably still have pillows fights and make daisy chains

-dele with the soft hugs i mean look at this

-they’re just really adorable and more people need to love them

Here is this week’s FIc Rec

1. I’m Fearless with My Heart by dontletmedown

    Words: 25k
    Tumblr: @princessyles

What do you do when your heart is in one place and your brain that’s trying to keep you sane is only holding on by a thin thread?

[The one where a young Louis is naive and fearless with his heart when he meets a very married Harry.

He possibly doesn’t stand a chance.]

2. Electing Strange Perfections
      by lightofathousandstars

   Words: 84k
   Tumblr: @scrunchyharry

Back for the summer from university, 19-year-old Louis is faced with a massive problem: their new gardener is quite possibly the most gorgeous man he’s ever met. Over the course of the summer, Louis and a 25-year-old Harry will learn that love can be found where you least expect it.

3. Nobody Else Has You Down, but Me by twinks

   Words: 11k

Is Styles really your last name ?

If this isn’t a pick up line I’ll be very disappointed…xx

Louis’ heart races. He sucks it up and types quickly.

You really think I’d go straight for the cliche ‘cool last name, can I have it’? Asking for a stranger’s hand in marriage is a bit forward … Don’t you think ?

[Louis gets set up on a dating website. Harry is one of his 12 matches.]

4. Tangled up in You by missandrogyny

    Words: 45k
      Tumblr: @paynner

Harry blinks once. And blinks again. And says, his voice dangerous: “Niall, did you get me a mail-order bride?”

Because what the actual fuck. It kind of looks like Niall’s just purchased a person. For Harry.

Niall blinks back at him for a few moments, before throwing his head back and howling with laughter. Harry throws a pillow at him. Hard. “No, what the fuck, Harry.”

“A prostitute then?” Harry also doesn’t want a prostitute.

“Of course not!”

“A stripper?”

“No!”

Damn, he’s running out of ideas. He settles for launching another pillow at Niall’s head. Niall bats it away easily, still laughing. “Stop!”

“What did you get me, then?!” Niall must hear the tinge of hysteria in his voice, because he’s pulling himself together, trying to stop himself from laughing.

There’s still a big grin on his face, though, when he says, “I got you a professional cuddler.”

A professional…what. “What?”

5. He’s Been My Queen Since We Were 16
      by larriebane

   Words: 30k
    Tumblr: @larriebane

Louis Tomlinson had been best friends with his neighbor’s son, Harry, as long as he could remember. The 16-year-old was small for his age and got bullied for being a weak alpha but Louis was there to help him. However, when the omega graduated from college and left for a university in London, he lost all contact with the Curly One. Five years later Louis finds himself back home, stalking a leggy hottie who looks like something from his wet dreams.

‘When did Curly get so hot?’

Newt’s Expulsion

Resume: You and Newt are the best of friends, but you have always love him and little did you knew he felt the same. Newt accidently threatens the life of another student with one of his creatures and is expelled. 

Warnings: none. 

Words=997

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It happened while you were having a class of Defense against the Dark Arts. Everyone in the classroom heard it. There were screams and thunders. We all turned and everyone started to murmur. The professor got up and ran out of the classroom and told us to stay. Of course we were too curious and everyone stand up and ran behind him.

The screams came from the Great Hall and we all walked there. Almost everyone was near. You heard a familiar sound and once you remembered the beast you knew who was all the fuss about.

“Shit” you mumble and try to pass over the crowd to see Newt trying to catch the “Swooping Evil”. 5 students were in the ground, they didn’t seemed dead but rather hurt. “Newt!” You yell and he turned at hearing your voice and looked at you with guilt and embarrassment.

The teacher of DADA came and cast a sleeping curse to the Swooping Evil making it fall and Newt running to get it but was stopped by the other teachers that came.

Everyone was watching the scene. All of the teachers looked at Newt in disapproval. You gulped as you saw Newt standing there turning to see the students who were hurt in the ground.

It didn’t take long before the Prefects of each house send us to our corresponded common rooms.

While being in the common room everyone was talking about Newt, and not in a pretty way, you knew Newt wasn’t much loved in the school and now it was worse.

You wanted to ignore all the negative and nasty comments but it was so hard.

You escape to your room and waited a little. By the time when everyone was sleeping you went down to the common room and sat in the couch and waited for Newt.

You were worried as hell, you told Newt the danger that it was having the creatures hiding in the forest but he wouldn’t listen.

The clock marked midnight and there was no sign. ‘Maybe he came hours ago when I was in my room’ I thought positively. You count to 20 and stand and forcedly started to walk to the stairs until you heard the door open and saw Newt getting in.

He met your eyes and you his.

“What are you doing awake?” he whispered. You blinked a little seeing him with his head down. His uniform was a mess just like his hair.

“Waiting for you” you answered. He looked at you once again and you could see now perfectly the red nose and the red eyes. He cried.

“What happened Newt? How did the Swooping Evil got inside?” you asked getting near him. He sight. “I let him in” he whispered. “What? Newt, how could you?” you said. Newt looked away. “Look I don’t need you to tell me I did wrong, I know I did, believe me I’ve been reminded of that since I went to the headmaster’s office” he said quite madly and walked over the chimney.

You felt badly, he was right you were being too harsh.

You walked over him and sat next to him. You both stood in deadly silence for a while until you spoke. “I’m sorry” you said simply. He sight. “No, I’m sorry” He said. Again deadly silence. You wanted to ask what happened but you were too afraid of the answer. You were about to open your mouth when Newt spoke.

“I’m expelled” he said clearly not able to look at you. Your heart froze. The words repeat in your mind. “What? E-Expelled? But-They can’t!” you said standing up. You wanted to brake something, you wanted him to laugh and said he was joking but as he looked up at your with his eyes looking like clean glass. He sniff. “They did” he whisper.

You pressed your lips together and turned around and walked towards the door. “What are you doing (y/n)?” he asked. “I’m going to the headmaster’s office and give him a piece of my mind” you said angrily. “No!” he said and ran towards you and block the exit. “They can’t expel you!” You said. “Don’t make this harder for me (y/n). They can, they did. I’m going away tomorrow” he said and his voice was shaking.

Tears streamed down your cheeks. You couldn’t look at him. “You can’t leave me” you whispered. He wrapped his long arms around you and hugged you tightly. You hugged back and buried your face in his chest. You cried and he cried, and you both stayed crying silently for a while. You broke the hug and looked at him in the eyes. “What’s going to happen?” You asked. He looked down. “Theseus is coming for me tomorrow, I’m going back home. My parents already talk to me” he whispered. You looked away. Newt’s parents can sometimes be a little harsh and mostly to Newt, they’ve always want him to be more like Theseus.

“I want to go with you” you said. “No, you have to stay. You have to graduate” he said. You bite your lip. You have to tell him, it was now or never.

“I love you Newt” you said looking at him. He looked surprise and taken back. “F-For real?” he asked. You nod. A warm expression filled his face. “I love you too” the answer were magical words. You jumped to his neck and slam your lips with his. It took him a little to follow the kiss but he soon drown in it and kissed back. His lips were as soft as a pillow and tasted like tea. It was the kiss of a lifetime. It was a little melancholic and bittersweet. He was going to leave, and you couldn’t do anything about it. He was going back to London while you remain here for another 5 months. But you knew that he was still going to be there, once you were out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks for reading :) Please remember I make requests! And I make a tag list also. Just notify me!

@smilexcaptainx

The Broom Shed Exchange

Chapter Summary: When Harry is just dumb and heart-sick enough to break into Hogwarts and see Ginny. Basically, it’s pure fluff.

Chapter 3 of 3, and also on AO3!

A/N: Here’s the end of it. It’s been fun. Enjoy!


Ginny slunk down on her bed, her bed curtains closed tight, biting a leg off a chocolate frog and tilting her head to better watch the Marauder’s Map under the light of her wand. Most people were in the Great Hall, enjoying the rest of the Halloween Feast, but Ginny couldn’t be bothered to join them. She’d made an appearance and ate a decent share against both her sudden introversion and lack of appetite. Both were unusual for her, but on occasional nights like tonight she preferred solitude and silence.

She gave a sigh and let the map fall flat on her stomach, noxing her wand. Ginny had taken to watching the map frequently, like a muggle would a television. She wasn’t sure what she was expecting to find; it’s not like there were any more Death Eaters roaming the castle anymore. As her heart pulled towards a hollow ache deep inside her, Ginny confessed to herself that she really wasn’t watching the map to scout trouble.

She was watching the map to scout Harry.

Keep reading

in which y/n can’t get enough of harry… 

Y/N’s already in bed watching tv while Harry’s going through his nightly routine. It wasn’t anything extraordinary. Quite mundane, actually. He did the same spiel every other person does—the whole shower, brushing his teeth, and blowing out his hair thing because it’s that time of year that’s not very conducive to walking about with wet hair (even if he is in the house, also he doesn’t like getting his pillow wet). Again, nothing out of the ordinary. 

So, she’s not really sure why she’s so enraptured when then he comes out of the bathroom still slightly damp with his towel wrapped around his waist. She’d seen his naked body plenty times before but there’s just something in that moment about his defined abs and firm pectorals that are somehow still mildly soft to the touch. She knows because she’d felt him up the night before and then some. 

Still, she’s taken aback by the sight of his bare torso and suddenly the documentary she’d landed on, on National Geographic didn’t seem that interesting anymore. She’s pretty sure he knows she’s checking him out, but he continues on as if her eyes aren’t burning holes into the skin of his back that she now gets a proper view of as he’s turned towards his dresser slipping on some briefs. His back is just as delicious as his front. All broad and expansive and smooth and the next time she gets him in a compromising position she might just take a bite out of him.

Something about him is just making her feel all the feels and she’s about to create a compromising position sooner than she had anticipated until he begins to pull on a shirt and she shouts out “NO!” in a frenzied panic. He turns around mildly alarmed, but once he sees her chest heaving and blown out pupils his face drops into that stupidly smug smirk that she hates and loves at the same time. 

Still, he doesn’t drop the shirt, “’S chilly, love.”

“We can turn the thermostat up,” she bargains.

“Yeah, but then the upstairs will be boiling, and I have a bit of work to finish up in the morning. It takes too long to cool down. Don’t wanna roast, love. ’S not conducive to a creative work environment." 

Her brain struggles to come up with a plausible reason for him to put the dumb shirt back in the drawer. If she weren’t so flustered she’d know that he was just baiting her, but it’s good to let him have the upper hand everyone once in a while. It makes it easier to bend him to her will, and she really can’t imagine a scenario where this turns out bad for either of them so she goes along with it. "I’ll grab another blanket. Two if you want." 

He wages her proposition in his head before tossing the shirt aside. "I s'pose that’ll be alright,” he grins and crawls into bed. In turn, she crawls right over to him and got him in that compromising position she’d been drooling over ever since he set foot in their bedroom.

tag thing

I was tagged by the awesome @carry-on-kissing-snowbaz!

Thanks Kayla!!

Rules: answer 11 questions, ask 11 questions, tag 11 people

1) What’s your aesthetic: books and rain boots and cats and donuts? idk

2) Who’s your oldest friend (how long have you been friends): my frand Lindsay – she’s a year older than me and I’ve known her basically all my life (give or take a few days) so 14ish years

3) Where are you from (Europeans hmu): BC, Canada!!!!!!! ALL HAIL MOTHER CANADIAAAAAA

4) Favorite childhood tv show (what channel was it on): (IM STILL A CHILD) uhhhh. Idk, maybe Tom and Jerry? I think it’s from cartoon network

5) How old are you? (me me bIG boi): 14, a smol child

6) Thoughts on trash memes (i’m talking bee movie shit right here): >~>

7) Do you wear highlight (or makeup in general idk) (if not bitch get ur ass down to the drug store and buy some pls it’s beautiful and will change your life): nope. aaand I’m  broke

8) Harry Potter books or movies?: BOOKS. MY CHILDHOOD. (me@me: trin ur still a child)

9) Would you date me (this is for science, not my self esteem): Kayla ur gorgeous but also in a relationship,,, I’m not a homewrecker. Also ur 20

10) What accent do you have? Idk. A Canadian one I guess?

11) What’s your favorite thing in your room? My desk, cuz it has all my stuff on it. Wait no. by that logic, it’s the floor. Or all my pillows n blankets because pillows and blankets are amazing

My 11 questions if you’ve already done this… hmm....

1) Crunchy foods or soft foods?

2) Fav music genre?

3) If u were going to relive one day of your life from the last five years (but it can be more if you want!), what day would it be and why?

4) Do you have any stuffed animals? If so, what are their names :)?

5) Whatcha thinking about rn?

6) What’s your favourite drink?

7) Random fact about you or your family:

8) Thoughts on turtles:

9) Fav obscure ice cream flavour:

10) Place you would wanna travel to on an all expenses paid (no matter how unreasonable!) trip:

11) If you could eat anything in the world without suffering negative consequences, what would you eat? (just to be clear, it’s not instantly teleported to you, you just have the ability to eat it):

I don’t have 11 people to tag on this, but I’ll try a few

@slightlystalesushirolls @queen-of-pigeons @lysandra-ashryver-blackbeack @drawing-sherlock @xbooksxandxbooks @wildfirewarren @i-want-to-look-at-the-stars @yuuriandviktorr @yurioooooooo

It’s alright if you don’t want to do this!!

anonymous asked:

Hiya, I'm wanting a bit of a pick-me-up so I'm wondering if you've got any cute/fluffy Drarry fics with Teddy being a part of it? Maybe something along the lines of It Was We Who Were Cliché?

I might have gotten carried away a bit. Here you go, so much Teddy Lupin i’m starting to see blue;

A Second Chance at First Love by Taradiane (27k)
“… I just wanted you to know that you weren’t the only one who’d had a shitty existence for a time. Maybe I hated that you thought I was someone I wasn’t. Maybe … maybe I hated that I thought you were someone you weren’t, but never realised it until Voldemort gave me those glimpses of your life. Our experiences, they weren’t so different after all.” 

Like a Real Family by Queenie_Mab (10k)
Harry thought he had all he wanted in life, raising Teddy and being the parent he’s always wanted to be, until he experiences what life with a partner could be like. Now if only Draco wasn’t straight. 

The Ties That Bind by Phoenix_Writing (61k)
Upon Andromeda’s death, Harry and Draco are given custody of Teddy. Their lives will never be the same again. 

Sunday, Monday or Always by Distempered (6k)
While raising Teddy Lupin on his own, Harry discovers that he’s got a little future Slytherin on his hands who knows his way around a scheme – especially when that scheme leads to a happily ever after. 

Where your heart is set by hazel_wand (13k)
Draco comes home from school to find that his mother has decided to rebuild their family to include Andromeda, Teddy … and Harry Potter.

Don’t Blame Me (It Was All a Blur Last Night) by nerakrose (18k)
“Stop moving, Potter,” Malfoy mumbled from where his head was buried under a pillow. “You’re disturbing my hangover. Also, why are you still here?”
“This is my hotel room,” Harry told him.

Somebody to Love by khasael (31k)
Draco’s life after the war is quite different than it used to be. When he finds himself cursed, with little hope for lifting the spell, he sets out to make the most of the time he has left. Getting to know his Aunt Andromeda and his young cousin Teddy feels like a good thing to do, even if it can’t help him in the long run…or can it?

Rules Are Made to Be Broken by leela_cat (8k)
Harry’s week is off to a rocky start: Teddy’s being bullied by bureaucratic assholes at primary school, he missed the first meeting of a club he’s sponsoring at Hogwarts, and Draco Malfoy can’t seem to decide whether to yell at him or flirt with him. And then there are the rules…

Vulnera Sanentur by sw33tch3rrypi3 (6k)
Harry can’t believe what’s on the list of required textbooks Teddy needs for his next year of Hogwarts. For DADA it’s Some Bloody Idiot Might Cast It, So You’d Better Be Able to Counter It by Draco Malfoy. Harry thinks the title refers to him casting Sectumsempra on Draco Malfoy in their sixth year and goes to confront him.

Save My Wonders by sdk (21k)
Immediately chocolate assaulted Draco’s senses. Warm melted chocolate mixed with his mother’s roses and… something else. Something new. Freshly scrubbed skin and maybe a faint sheen of sweat. It was so familiar…
And it only intensified when Potter came up behind him.

Parenting 101 by beespiesandplaid (33k)
When Andromeda falls sick, Harry is forced to take his duties as godfather seriously and care for four year old Teddy. When Hermione convinces him to attend a support group for single wizarding parents, the last person he expects to find himself sitting beside is Draco Malfoy.

Un Noël très parisien by noeon (14k) 
When Draco crossed paths with Auror Potter at a political function in Paris, he was not expecting their former animosity to change into something rather more intriguing. But he could be certain their casual flirtation would not last more than the night, couldn’t he?

And Back Again (Where You Belong) by @eidheann (15k)
He thought back on their previous handshakes, and smiled faintly at the fact they always seemed to mean so much more to him than they did to Potter.

The Years Before Love by Lomonaaeren (13k)
Harry didn’t ever dream he could have a family beyond the Weasleys. But then, at one point he didn’t dream he could have a family beyond the Dursleys, either. He tries not to think too much about those years, but in a way, they’ve made him what he was and given him what he has now.

“Merlin, FINE. You can be Harry Potter for Halloween.” by 606 (2k)
That one where Draco and Scorpius run into Harry Potter (rather literally) in a London convenience store and their Halloween takes an odd turn.

Bad Faith in Name, But Gracious in Nature by megyal (13k)
Wizarding children have developed a life-threatening condition caused by an old curse. The cure is to be found in the Malfoy Library; surprisingly, Malfoy is willing to help, but only if Harry helps improve his standing in the Wizarding community. (Contains a fair amount of Ted ‘Teddy’ Lupin.)

Against All Odds by momatu (53k)
Beauxbatons is hosting the first ever Quidditch Summer School for children from all over Europe, and Harry has promised to enroll Teddy as his birthday present. Meanwhile, Draco is stuck in his office, putting together the first ever Quidditch Summer School for children from all over Europe during, when he should be enjoying summer holidays.

It Was We Who Were the Cliché (But we Carried On Anyway) by IgnatiusTrout (31k)
When the reconciled Black sisters go on holiday together, Andromeda entrusts Draco, rather than Harry, with five year old Teddy Lupin for three weeks. Harry is convinced she made the wrong choice, and he decides the way to fix this is simply to keep turning up at the manor and refusing to leave Draco alone.

Our Ordinary Days by Lomonaaeren (8k)
Two men, both fathers of sons, meet in a bookshop. And the rest is the kind of history that doesn’t make history.

The Stars Above Us by 606 and create_serenity (19k)
It started as an innocent day out taking Teddy to visit the local observatory. Somehow it became so much more.

Muggle Beasts and Where to Find Them by ashindk (8k)
Two single fathers choose the same day to take their children on an outing.

Systemic Morality by zeitgeistic (34k)
One screw-up changes everything. Harry really should learn to lock the door before having sex with Draco when his godson’s around. A tale of hot, steamy, flowing love—for Padma Patil and Theodore Nott. A tale of colossal screw-ups and slow, flangsty (sexy) resolutions for Harry and Draco.

Let Me Be Your Prince by @goldentruth813 (6k)
When Harry Potter moves into the empty flat across the hallway Draco just knows its going to turn his life upside down. Things are further complicated by Harry’s godson Teddy who is a regular fixture in his life, and soon becomes one in Draco’s. [Sequels Best Christmas + New Years Eve ]

The Tapestry of Kinship by khalulu (14k)
Harry is at loose ends, Draco is good with needles, and Draco’s young daughter wants to see a certain tapestry repaired. The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black will never be the same.

Home Is Where The Heart Is by @julietsemophase (8k)
Draco is struggling with his anxiety as he arrives at his aunt’s house to help Andy and Teddy out. Will the presence of Teddy’s godfather, the handsome and friendly Harry Potter, make any difference?

Warning Sign by Kedavranox (16k)
Teddy gets sick. Narcissa plots. Harry resists. Draco wants.

Obliviation by dysonrules (26k)
When Harry decides to quit Auror Training in order to care for young Teddy over the summer, he has quite enough to worry about without Pansy Parkinson dumping a mute Draco Malfoy on his doorstep.

Ties in the heart by digthewriter (8k)
Teddy brings them together, and Draco’s guilt tears them apart.

Humbug (A Christmas Tale) by Snegurochka (29k)
Draco has been taking his casual relationship with Harry for granted. Visits from four key ghosts the night before Christmas just might shake up his priorities in life.

A Piercing Comfort by talithan (44k)
When Harry Potter hits the lowest point of his life so far, it is not his friends who keep him honest. With Draco Malfoy’s patience and guidance, Harry learns to stand on his own. The thing is, after the fact—he’s no longer sure he wants to.

Operation-Cheer Up Uncle Harry by LoriFanFic (15k)
Teddy has a plan. His newly divorced godfather and widowed cousin have been circling around each other for ages. After trying on his own to help get them together he brings in the Cavalry but was it really necessary?

Solidarity by leontina (16k)
Six years after the war, Harry runs into Draco again who Harry learns is an LGBTQ+ activist. Harry decides to join him in campaigning when a proposition to legalise same-sex marriage is put to a public vote. 

anonymous asked:

Hi, do you know any fake relationship au? :)

Holy shit. I can’t believe nobody asks me this before? Like, it’s one of my fav trope ever?

So, yes!!!  I know a lot of them !!  here we go:

Of course I have to start with some basis :

- And Then a Bit: “We’d like to give the fans what they want.” Magee states, placing his hand on the table in front of him and leaning forward. “We want to give them Larry Stylinson.”  Or, take a parallel universe where Louis and Harry were never together, mix in a two year hiatus and an impending comeback, pour in a dash of lost fans, two tablespoons of strong friendship and a Modest! employee with a good idea. Add a squeeze of pretending to be a couple, lots of kisses and a tattoo or two. Stir. Serve: the mother of all publicity stunts.(aka Harry and Louis fake a relationship for publicity. Eventually it becomes a lot less fake and a lot more real.) (158k, Canon)

- Pull Me Under       : AU. As the first British footballer to come out at the prime of his career,  it helps that Louis Tomlinson is in a long-term, committed   relationship. Even if that relationship is fake. (Featuring Niall as Louis’ favourite teammate, Liam as Louis’ agent, and Zayn as Liam’s boyfriend, who just happens to be good friends with one Harry Styles.) (140k, on my Top 5 fics ever tbh)

- Spin Me Like A Record       : Uni AU. Sometimes, Louis poses as Harry’s boyfriend. It doesn’t mean anything. Really. (8k)

- Some Things Take Root       : AU. Louis’ ex doesn’t get jealous of anyone besides Harry. Harry helps Louis use that to his advantage. (50k)

- for now (and forever)  :  “It’s nice that you want to offer that, but I just can’t do that. First of all, it’s illegal.”Louis shakes his head vigorously. “No, no. It’s not like one of us is gunning for a visa.”  “Listen to yourself,” Harry laughs, shaking Louis’ shoulders. “Don’t you think it’s a bit weird to con the country you’re supposed to be serving?”Louis is going into the Army, Harry is going nowhere, and there’s nothing like a little identity fraud between friends. (83k, I’m so in love with this fic tbh)

And then I’m gonna add …:

- nobody shines the way you do : “We might as well just date.”Harry froze in his arms, his body stilled as he slowly lifted his head up at Louis to give him the most confused expression he’d ever worn. Louis literally wanted to fuck him into the next century. “What?” Harry asked. “Are you–.”“No,” Louis said, shaking his head before Harry could go far with that idea and trap Louis into confessing his own feelings. “I mean…like I think I have a plan?”“A plan?” Harry said slowly. “A plan other than me going to Peter’s tomorrow and groveling for hours; maybe even days?”The thought of Harry doing that made Louis’s skin burn, but he schooled his expression well and nodded swiftly. “There will be no groveling. Well, there will be, but not on your end.”orLouis pretends to be Harry’s boyfriend to help him win back his douchebag ex-boyfriend, but things don’t go according to plan. (115k, one of my fav)

- 90 Day Return : It was all supposed to be mutual promo. That’s it. A boyfriend for the winter - Louis can do this. (15k, actor!Louis and singer!HArry)

- (your heartbeat) rang true inside my bones : Harry goes as Louis’ date for a weekend wedding. He ends up taking the role a bit too seriously.  “Hey,” Harry hears himself say just as Louis climbs back into the car. He ducks down, holding onto the roof to look at Louis who cocks his brow at him and says, “What?”  “I meant it,” Harry starts. “Like, I’d do it. I’d be your date for the wedding. If it’d make you feel less awful about being there and if you want me to, I’ll do it. I promise I’ll be good.”  (32k, Canon fic)

- Hit the Heartbrakes : With his best friend and eternal roommate Zayn getting married and abandoning him, Louis has planned the world’s biggest stag do to send him off into married life – a week in Thailand showing him all the things he’s going to be missing when he becomes a married man. But Zayn has neglected to mention that Louis’ ex and their old uni friend Paddy will be coming – along with his successful, rich new boyfriend. Determined not to let Paddy ruin his fun once again, he enlists the help of an attractive backpacker by the name of Harry, who good-naturedly agrees to go along with pretending he’s Louis’ boyfriend for the week. A week of sun, sea, booze and no-strings-attached sex beckons, but as always, things don’t go quite as planned… (13k)

- Give Me A Chance  : au. Louis gets bullied a lot. Harry’s captain of the football team. (36k, High School AU)

- Always Come Back To You : “I’ll do it,” Harry offers brightly. No one even blinks. “I’ll do it?”Louis sighs irritably. “Shut up,” he orders, tossing a pillow in the general direction of Harry’s face. This is a terrible time for jokes, especially Harry’s lame, old people ones.Not that it was an old people joke. Just that most of the time Harry’s jokes consist of knock-knocks or terrible puns. The type of jokes old people like, Louis’ pretty sure. His nan always finds them hilarious when Harry tells her one.Harry bats the pillow out of the air without even blinking. “Be reasonable, Lou,” he says in his most reasonable voice.Louis is perfectly reasonable, thank you very much, and he’s also frustrated and upset and tired and he really wants to punch something. Maybe he should have held on to that pillow a little longer.“You’re not gonna fucking do it,” he snaps. “That’s the last thing I need.” (28k, canon)

-walk my days on a wire : Harry hums, staring at his hands in his lap, and Louis can still feel their smoothness, how solid they were in between his own. “Do you think it’s the same for us? Are we here only because of the likeliness of our jobs? Of our lives?”
“We’re here because we have inventive managers,” Louis says, giving Harry’s leg a little nudge with his knee, but all that’s going around in his head is, I think I’d be in the same spot in every possible universe.  or, when actor Louis Tomlinson used to daydream about dating Harry Styles, this is not what he had in mind. (38k, famous!AU)

- bring out feelings in me i never show  : “I really think you should stop reading,” Liam says, having moved to hover behind Louis’ back at some point. “I can already see the cogs turning in your head, Louis, and I don’t like this.”“Shut up,” Louis waves him off and continues reading.  I can do these things, at your request: openly hit on other female guests while you act like you don’t notice; start instigative discussions about politics and/or religion; propose to you in front of everyone; pretend to be really drunk as the evening goes on (sorry I don’t drink, but I used to); start an actual, physical fight with a family member, either inside or on the front lawn for all the neighbors to see. [Louis accidentally hires a felon to be his fake boyfriend for Thanksgiving. Or, the fake boyfriends au no one asked for, inspired by this.] (24k, very funny)

- don’t be afraid, it’s only love : A proposal!AU where Louis is at risk of being deported back to England and Harry just really wants a promotion. (14k, like the movie)

- For Better, Worse And Mischief (I’m All Yours) : The One Direction PR management team decides that Harry needs to get married. Harry doesn’t want to. Louis comes up with the perfect solution to the problem. (37k, canon)

- Stuck In The Middle With You  : When Harry starts university, he finally gets to spend every day with Louis again. They have been friends since forever, and would do anything for each other. Given that, Harry doesn’t hesitate to pose as Louis’ boyfriend once he finds out that his new roommate is no other than Louis’ crush. Cue the usual. And maybe a bit of the unusual. (11k, uni AU)

Also I have to add Escapade in this list even if you can’t read it  totally on AO3 anymore

And if you can read outside Larry :

- If I Was Your Boyfriend, I’d Never Let You Go  : “Harry, you essentially just told my sister that we’re dating.”“Pretty much,” Harry says, and grins. “Champagne?”in other words, pretending to be boyfriends fic (10k, Lirry)

- Smile Again  : Recently dumped Louis sets his kitchen on fire on Christmas Eve. Fireman Liam makes the mistake of inviting him home for Christmas. Chaos and feelings ensue. (16k, Lilo)

- and you take me the way i am : It’s incredibly relaxing, even in this small space, the way they’ve always been.  Such a distraction that he doesn’t think, not for once, about agreeing to lie to his family and Zayn pretending to be his date and how easy all of this might be.(Liam needs a date to a wedding.  His family loves to match him up with blind dates.  He doesn’t want that.  He needs a date… and, well, why not Zayn.  Pretending to be boyfriends for a weekend isn’t the worst idea he supposes.  Liam is horribly wrong.) (54k, Ziam)

- April Fools : Now, staring down at the platinum band on his own left hand (“only the best for you, Liam,” Louis had said, smirking as he slid the ring on Liam’s finger), Liam wasn’t so sure any of this was the best idea for an April Fool’s prank. But both of them knew he would go along with it. Liam always did. (12k, Lilo)

- let’s pretend it’s love  : Pretend!boyfriends fic in which Liam and Zayn get papped while hamming it up for Louis and Eleanor, and management decides the easiest way to deal with the resulting hysteria is to let it run its course. (68k, Ziam)

- boyfriend material (that’s what you’re made of) : “What a nice lad,” Pete says, making Nick jump in surprise. He turns to find his parents standing side by side, staring at him with identical smiles on their faces. Nick’s gaze narrows as his eyes dart between his parents.“Yeah, I mean, I guess he’s alright,” Nick says warily.“So is he your special someone then?” his mum bursts out, and oh god, she’s actually giddy. or the one where Nick accidentally tells his parents that he’s dating Louis Tomlinson from One Direction. (11k, Tomlinshaw)


UPDATE : (last update: April 4th2017)

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

So whenever I'm sad or stressed I just remember that the only time I've ever seen one Mr. Liam Payne have real sexual chemistry with any woman is when he was following around/flirting with/talking about and openly ogling one Mr. Zayn "Sexy Secretary Veronica" Malik and then I feel happy and at peace with the bullshit

I still don’t even understand what we did to deserve getting to see this play out?

Or why Liam felt the need to tell everyone about nakee Zayn with pillow-y boobs akimbo and his penis flapping about and making animal shapes in the shadows of the wall? But I’m just so grateful?

Limothy was defo super into “Veronica “Sexy Secretary” Malik 

LOOK how Harreh knows. OH, HARREH KNOWS. 

Harry also seemed to be super into Veronica Malik

To be fair though, who wouldn’t be? It’s almost unfair that beautiful man Zayn

 is also beautiful woman Zayn,

whereas I spend 47% of my taxable income at Sephora to look like I shouldn’t be chained in a windowless shed to not cause my neighbors distress. #my struggle

smeagolandsauron  asked:

Hey, can you rec any drarry fics where Harry and Draco are roommates?

Hello there! Sure I can. Harry and Draco as roommates is one of my favourite tropes (I have a lot of favourite tropes. ^^). So here are several for you. All of these are them as roommates/flatmates before they got together. :D I hope you enjoy them.

(The Piece) I was Missing All Along by lauren3210
Summary: Draco and Harry have been flatmates and best friends for years, and Draco thinks life is just perfect that way. But when something comes along and threatens to take all that away, Draco has to decide what it is he really wants, and just how hard he’s going to work to get it.

Something I Don’t Want to Stop by traintracks (NC-17, 16,2K)
Summary: It’s Harry and Draco’s eighth year, the Houses have been all but demolished in favor of unity, and they’re being forced to room together. How ever will they cope?

Room Mating by Queenie_Mab (NC-17, 6,5K)
Summary: Harry and Draco are roommates after Hogwarts, having forged an unlikely friendship. However, after a night of Draco going through his exes to try and figure out where he’s gone wrong in his romantic life, he comes to discover that he could want more than friendship with The Boy Who Lived.

Keeping a Secret by snugglemint (PG-13, 5,3K)
Summary: Funny how in the absence of his room mate, he begins finding mysterious feathers in unusual places. It might also be funny that he seems to be hoarding them.

The Lodger (Series) by mad_martha (PG-13, 68,8K)
Summary: Years after Voldemort’s death and the end of the war, a lonely and alienated Harry Potter decides to take in a lodger. The result isn’t quite what he anticipated. He has more in common with his new housemate than he expected, and together they learn to look life – and the wizarding world - in the face again.

House Boty Is Bad Booty by @oceaxereturns (R, 11,1K)
Summary: Draco knows it’s not okay to have a crush on one’s housemate. Which is why he should never have let Harry move in. Cameo by character from another fandom- sorry, I couldn’t resist.

An Act of Kindness for One Harry Potter by a Sympathetic Draco Malfoy by 0idontknow0 (NC-17, 15,4K)
Summary: s Draco leaned on the wall to wait for them to get dressed, he could not help feeling like he had done a very kind thing by disrupting them. Someone should give Potter a better rogering than that sorry sod had. The man had saved the bloody world—okay, mostly Europe—the least someone could do was give him a proper shag.

The More The Merrier by @cassieblack (PG-13, 15K)
Summary: Draco’s determined to make this their best Christmas ever and Harry’s not about to stop him – even if it does mean carol concerts and late-night shopping!

Strange Bedfellows by treacle_tartlet (PG-13, 6,5k)
Summary: Harry and Draco are living together at Grimmauld Place, because of reasons. Stuff happens. Look, just read the fic, okay?

The Squad by vala (Pg-13, 23K)
Summary: Within the Ministry of Magic is a department that takes on the assignments that the DMLE cannot. They are composed of an elite group of individuals that specialise in combat, infiltration and reconnaissance. Their identities are classified and missions are top-secret. They answer to no one save the Minister of Magic himself.

Living with Dragons by FantasyFiend09 (NC-17, 14,2K)
Summary: Harry wants to apprentice for Charlie’s team at the dragon reserve, but they already have an apprentice: a very fit wizard who tends to bring out Harry’s obsessive side.

Living, Loving and Learning: A Tale of Two Dragons (And Two Stubborn, Unreasonable Boys) by @dracogotgame (NC-17, 14,2K)
Summary: Draco’s orderly existence at the Dragon Reserve is upended by Harry Potter’s arrival. Meanwhile, a dragon struggles to fly. A Draco POV remix of the delightful Living with Dragons by fantasyfiend09. [I suggest you read them in that order, first “Living with Dragons” and then this one. :)]

The Moon Looks Lovely Tonight by Omi_Ohmy (R, 35,7K)
Summary: When Harry moves into the damp and empty Black house, it doesn’t quite feel like home. And then the first owl moves in. After that, it’s a steep slope leading to bed-sharing, more owls, assorted housemates, strange potions experiments, and terrible cooking. And a bit of waltzing, too.

All Must Draw Near by saras_girl (R, 61K)
Summary: Harry doesn’t have time for rumours; he has a shop to run. Which is just as well, really.

How Auror Potter Finally Solved the Most Important Mystery of His Career by FantasyFiend09 (NC-17, 9,7K)
Summary: Harry is NOT in a romantic relationship with Draco; no matter what everyone else seems to believe.

Kiss Me, Cure Me by @alpha-exodus (NC-17, 5,1K)
Summary: “But when you were gay and in love with your straight best mate, thus was life.”

Domestic by Frostywonder (R, 54,8K)
Summary: Harry finds a stray and decides to take him home.

Kissing Boys by @julietsemophase ( NC-17, 5,6K)
Summary: Harry knows his dorm mate has a secret that’s eating him up inside. One night he finally decides to try and help. (Muggle college roommate AU.)

The Domestic Ramifications of Blowing Off Movie Night by bemygoodday (R, 8K)
Summary: Harry and Draco are best friends and flat mates. And Harry doesn’t like Draco that way. He doesn’t. He’s not even jealous of Blaise Zabini. At all.

A Long Way From Home by Samayel (NC-17, 5,9K)
Summary: Muggle AU: Harry arrives for his first day of college, and meets his new roommate, Drake.

Can’t Think Straight by @digtheshipper (NC-17, 9,4K)
Summary: Being in love with your straight friend is never a good idea. Especially when said friend lives with you. Or, what happens when you give your straight friend a blow job. That’s probably a bad idea too.

Don’t Blame Me (It Was All a Blur Last Night) by nerakrose (PG-13, 18,9K)
Summary: “Stop moving, Potter,” Malfoy mumbled from where his head was buried under a pillow. “You’re disturbing my hangover. Also, why are you still here?” // “This is my hotel room,” Harry told him.

Stormy Horizons by dirty_darella (R, 25K)
Summary: Draco is less than pleased when an unexpected house-guest shows up in the middle of the night.

Please, pretty please don’t forget to leave some love to the authors. ♥

[ for @isabellavswan +  the @slytherdornet september back-to-school challenge ]

  • long story short, the summer after everyone finally turns 21 is a fucking disaster.
  • the tiki-themed dive bars they’ve all been flashing fake IDs at for two and a half years suddenly feel a lot less like unexplored new territory and a lot more like oversized high school parties, and pansy’s bored.
  • she’s so bored, in fact, that the night she sleeps with—well, not her arch-nemesis, but definitely draco’s—she’s sitting at a questionably sticky hula skirted table, sipping a whiskey sour and grimacing at the horde of really obvious incoming freshmen ordering blowjob shots like they’re fucking new, all while lamenting her decision to wear stripper underwear on the off-chance that she lowers her standards enough to get laid.
  • so. long story short, it’s a little after midnight when she pours the rest of her whiskey sour down the back of potter’s t-shirt, hisses something scathing about ginny weasley dumping him for daphne over spring break, cries, and then fucks him in the backseat of his late-80’s monstrosity of a soccer mom SUV.
  • they forget about a condom, and the next morning, he leaves a copy of his most recent std panel at her apartment door, along with a cvs bag containing a box of plan b, a handful of fun-size milky ways, and a jumbo pack of tie-dye peace sign stickers.
  • pansy grits her teeth, eats the chocolate, washes it down with a starbucks mug full of white wine, and takes the fucking pill.
  • a month later, she walks into her poetry seminar and catches a glimpse of messy black hair and ugly tom ford glasses and tan skin, green eyes, broad shoulders and a gross wal-mart multipack v-neck—
  • and her very first instinct is to run the other way.
  • she doesn’t, of course.
  • her heels are way too high, for one, and she’s not breaking her ankle because harry potter’s lost his goddamn mind and decided to stalk her; and for two—well. she can’t avoid him forever, not now that draco’s also lost his goddamn mind and started dating hermione granger.
  • so. she slides into the empty seat next to potter as primly as she can, and then she sniffs in disdain when he smirks at her, and then she snaps, “i’m only sitting here because of the air conditioning,” which makes him laugh, and then he repeats, with mock seriousness, like he has any room to be judging her when he still has a pillow crease on his cheek at two in the fucking afternoon, “the air conditioning. right.”
  • she resolves to ignore him. it doesn’t work. weeks go by, and she begins to suspect that he’s tormenting her on purpose.
  • he wordlessly hands her an airport brochure for a fucking emu farm after he sees her collection of peacock feather pens, and when draco and granger finally force everyone to go sake-bombing at some shitty sushi restaurant in santa monica, potter spends most of the night stealing sashimi off pansy’s plate and poking her in the ribs with disposable chopsticks. she drags him to the san diego zoo because she’s too hungover to make the drive herself and she has to write a paper about pandas, and he goads her into eating a burrito the size of her car’s hubcaps at a tequila bar in the mission district because he’s an asshole.
  • and then one day, during midterms, she agrees to lend him her latin flashcards from last semester in exchange for his help with the five hundred cupcakes she has to bake for a garden party, and he has to come over.
  • for the flashcards, obviously.
  • and the cupcakes.
  • obviously.
  • and she sends him into the kitchen while she changes into something more comfortable—definitely not stripper underwear—and then she exits her bedroom and she opens her mouth to ask him if he wants any sangria, but the words die a swift, ignominious death on the tip of her tongue because he’s just standing there, stiff and silent, staring at her refrigerator door with a strange expression on his face. and pansy follows his gaze, wondering if her sorority’s community service schedule is really that confusing to him, but then she freezes.
  • freezes.
  • because there, next to the stainless steel frigidaire badge, is one of those horrible tie-dye peace sign stickers he’d given her what now feels like a million fucking years ago.
  • “i knew it,” he announces, sounding curiously relieved, which—
  • “what?” she asks, faintly, wondering if it’s possible to actually perish of humiliation.
  • “i knew it,” he says again, turning to face her, and his eyes are the same unfairly bright green they’ve always been, yeah, but the look in them—the look in them as he looks at her—it’s different. sharper. hotter. “i knew you liked me!”
  • “i do not like you,” she immediately scoffs, even though she’s reasonably sure she could burn a fucking bag of pop secret with nothing but the force of her blush.
  • “you do,” he says, smugly. “you absolutely like me.”
  • pansy clenches her jaw.
  • potter cocks his head to the side.
  • “well. i can only imagine you care about whether or not i—like you—because you like me!” she whisper-shouts.
  • he snorts. “you put my stickers on your fridge, pansy.”
  • “you gave me the stupid things!”
  • “yeah,” he says, slowly, no, softly, “that’s kind of the point.”
  • oh.
  • oh.

Settle in in my slow-burning heart
Five years after the war Draco is working a tech developer job in the Auror Office, and it’s all great except this one thing: Harry Potter works there, too. Things only become stranger when Harry starts bringing Draco ugly souvenirs back from his work travels. When Harry then shows up injured in Draco’s flat, Draco considers the possibility that he’s going insane.

Slammed
Potter develops a worrying habit of randomly wall-slamming Draco all over the castle.

Don’t Blame Me (It Was All a Blur Last Night)
“Stop moving, Potter,” Malfoy mumbled from where his head was buried under a pillow. “You’re disturbing my hangover. Also, why are you still here?”
“This is my hotel room,” Harry told him.

Crutch
Harry has too much to do, and Draco, too little. The solution? Hire him, of course. Who knew Draco Malfoy would be such a perfect personal assistant?

Ferocious Determination, Insufficient Deliberation, and a Slightly Wrong Destination
All Draco wants is sleep, but his bed won’t stop talking. More importantly, it refuses to stop looking like Harry Potter.

Edible Smudges and Insufferable Potters (and Insufferable Smudges and Edible Potters)
All Draco wants to do is study. That’s what libraries are for. Study History of Magic, that is. Not Potter.

The Rewards of Bravery
During an Auror mission gone wrong, Harry finds himself with an unexpected new power: he can tell when people are lying. It’s incredibly annoying, except for when Draco’s around…

Storm in a Teacup
For reasons he’d rather not think about, Draco is obsessed with Potter’s hair. This cannot end well.

Marginal Notes
When you’re 18, and nothing is as it was meant to be, sometimes it can be hard to let the right people know what you are thinking.

Good to Me (And I’d Be So Good to You)
Everyone returns to Hogwarts after the war, but nothing is quite the same. Harry’s groupies are creepier than ever, Ron and Hermione are snogging all over the place, and the once-proud Draco is shuffling around like a kicked puppy. But that’s okay: Harry’s got a plan.

Hey, Potter
Harry returns to Hogwarts for his 8th year, determined not to let Malfoy get to him. But when the snarky teasing starts up again, Harry finds that returning the jibes with compliments has a far more interesting outcome.

Then Comes a Mist and a Weeping Rain
It always rains for Draco Malfoy. Metaphorically. And literally. Ever since he had accidentally Conjured a cloud. A cloud that’s ever so cross.

The Standard You Walk Past
On returning to Hogwarts for their Eighth Year, Headmistress McGonagall decided to room Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter together. She may have hoped for a leading example of house unity; the other students fully expected insults and fights. But nothing happened.
That was, until Harry sleepwalked into Draco’s bed.

You Already Know What’s Next
It’s about Truth or Dare, except it’s not really about Truth or Dare at all. Or: there is alcohol and a bunch of twenty-somethings play embarrassing party games.

It Was We Who Were The Cliché (But We Carried On Anyway)
When the reconciled Black sisters go on holiday together, Andromeda entrusts Draco, rather than Harry, with five year old Teddy Lupin for three weeks. Harry is convinced she made the wrong choice, and he decides the way to fix this is simply to keep turning up at the manor and refusing to leave Draco alone.

An Issue of Consequence
Draco has woken up in an alternate universe. Or he has woken up utterly insane. Nothing else can possibly explain why Harry Potter suddenly seems to think he’s Draco’s boyfriend.

Salt on the Western Wind
When the war isn’t quite as over as it first appears, a guilt-ridden Harry is sent to a mysterious safe-house. Among sandwiches, insomnia, and Mills & Boon, he discovers something quite unexpected.

hello goodbye (‘twas nice to know you)
Draco Malfoy thinks he might know whose thoughts are scrawling themselves on his skin, but that’s crazy. Impossible, even. It has to be a mistake.

Five Times Draco Went to Potions
Five times Draco goes to Potions and One time he does not. Features Draco/Harry, a very observant Hermione, and Draco’s plans to take over the known world, starting with Hogwarts.

Sex on Legs in Six-Inch Heels
Draco Malfoy is a brilliant freelance cursebreaker and the only one who can help the Department of Magical Law Enforcement with a very dangerous case, but more importantly, he’s wearing six-inch heels, and Harry cannot handle it, he really just can’t.

Defining Dickhead
cockblock (vulgar, slang)
verb: to impede the romantic or sexual advances of a person (usually a man) towards another
cockblockhead (vulgar, slang)
noun: a person (usually a man) who unintentionally cockblocks themselves
see also entries for: self-sabotage, absolute idiocy, Harry James Potter

Special Magic
Harry was seriously considering the fact that his partner might be completely insane.

akirasmask  asked:

hello friend i am back again ur last recs were good (okay so i've only just got around to finishing secrets it's 400k long it too a bit of doing) bUUUUUUUT i was wondering if u knew of any more long fics like that where harry and draco eloped/got married/did the dads thing again because it stole my soul.

Welcome back! Secrets is one of my favs as well, i’m glad you enjoyed it. :) I’m gonna split this one in two.

Drarry + Marriage;

My Big Fat Pureblood Wedding by QueenyMidas (177k) 
Chaos ensues after Harry proposes to Draco on their three-year anniversary. The two must plan a wedding around their fighting friends, warring families, and each other’s stubbornness. EWE, post-war, disregarding Remus, Sirius, and Colin’s deaths and the fact that gay marriage is not legal in the UK.

Labor of Love by QueenyMidas (129k)
After their beautiful wedding, Draco supposes he has to hold up his end of the bargain on the topic of ‘offspring’. After years of convincing from Harry and years of pressure from Lucius, it looks as if the Malfoy-Potter family will be welcoming a bundle of joy. On top of that, their friends seem to be going through struggles of their own. Their dysfunctional family seems to be being tested once again, leaving many to wonder if it can weather the storm. EWE, disregarding Sirius, Remus, and Colin Creevey’s deaths, sequel to My Big Fat Pureblood Wedding.

Appallingly Wrong and Irreparably Broken by @tessacrowley (26k)
Everything in Harry’s life is pretty terrible, all things considered. His ex-wife won’t stop sleeping around, the government is broken, and his life is an endless cycle of crippling self-hatred and bitter sarcasm. So when Draco Malfoy comes sauntering back into it, sharp as a tack and twice as fit as he has any right to be, the only comfort Harry can find is that he can’t possibly make it any worse. You know, probably.

Don’t Blame Me (It Was All a Blur Last Night) by Nerakrose (18k)
“Stop moving, Potter,” Malfoy mumbled from where his head was buried under a pillow. “You’re disturbing my hangover. Also, why are you still here?”
“This is my hotel room,” Harry told him.

A Perfect Bond by Indyonblue (5k)
It’s Harry and Draco’s bonding day. Draco has planned it all so obviously nothing will go wrong.

There’s a Pure-blood Custom For That  by Lomonaaeren (105k)
The day that Harry stops Draco Malfoy and his son from being bothered in the middle of Diagon Alley starts a strange series of interactions between him and Malfoy. Who knew there was a pure-blood custom for every situation?

Synthetic Bonds by Mypetelephant (116k)
Harry has always been the golden boy of Malfoy Corporation, earning the respect of Lucius and the resentment of his high school rival, Draco. But Lucius has a business proposal that involves Harry becoming a Malfoy..by marrying Draco.Non-magic AU

Slithering by astolat (27k)
Draco found the nest down in the Manor’s cellars, while he was clearing them out.

Drarry + Kids;

Solder by Oakstone730 (34k)
Seven years ago, Harry disappeared out of Draco and Scorpius’s life without a trace after Harry’s addictions destroyed his and Draco’s marriage. Now, Harry’s back, and Draco wants to believe he’s changed. But Harry isn’t the only one haunted by the past. [Scorpius]

A Second Chance at First Love by Taradiane (27k)
“… I just wanted you to know that you weren’t the only one who’d had a shitty existence for a time. Maybe I hated that you thought I was someone I wasn’t. Maybe … maybe I hated that I thought you were someone you weren’t, but never realised it until Voldemort gave me those glimpses of your life. Our experiences, they weren’t so different after all.” [Teddy]

Brevem Conspectum by Lauren3210 (11k)
During a routine clearing of an old Death Eater house, Harry stumbles over an ancient spell that sends him somewhere completely different. He has to work out where he is and how to get back. Or if he even wants to. [OC]

Number Seven by Sara Holmes (265k)
Harry already has two children, an ex-wife, annoying colleagues and an international crime ring to deal with. So when Draco Malfoy reappears after eight years AWOL in France, of course Harry is going to leave him well alone…Right? [Scorpius, James, Albus]

Pocket Full of Starlights (Never Let It Fade Away) by Femmequixotic and Noeon (46k)
When Scorpius Malfoy and Jamie Potter meet at Quidditch camp, they take an instant dislike to each other. Then they discover their lives are more connected than they could possibly imagine. [Scorpius, James]

Time Heals All Wounds by Playout (17k)
Harry is a Healer with a savior complex. Draco is a newly-widowed single father. And Scorpius is the child who will bring them together. [Scorpius]

Like a Real Family by Queenie_Mab (10k)
Harry thought he had all he wanted in life, raising Teddy and being the parent he’s always wanted to be, until he experiences what life with a partner could be like. Now if only Draco wasn’t straight. [Teddy]

The Ties That Bind by Phoenix_Writing (61k)
Upon Andromeda’s death, Harry and Draco are given custody of Teddy. Their lives will never be the same again. [Teddy]

Sunday, Monday or Always by Distempered (6k)
While raising Teddy Lupin on his own, Harry discovers that he’s got a little future Slytherin on his hands who knows his way around a scheme – especially when that scheme leads to a happily ever after. [Teddy]

Love in Slow Motion by @lala-lady-elena (11k)
Harry flushed. “I’d like to do that again.”
Draco threw his head back and laughed. “Would you, now?”
Blinking up, Harry reached up with a shaking hand and brushed a bit of Draco’s blonde fringe away from his forehead. “Yeah. I would. Unless you’ve got someone better to get home to.”
“Are you joking? Potter, this is my fifteen year old fantasy come to life. But better. So much fucking better.”
Harry’s eyebrows went up. “Fifteen?”
“Well, it was more post-Quidditch hate-sex. But close enough.”
[Scorpius]

We’re Just a Box of Souvenirs by Quiddative (9k)
Harry returns to England. Draco won’t make the same mistakes again. [Scorpius]

My other lists, Drarry + Scorpius and Drarry + Teddy.

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you can leave your hat antlers on // a lock yourself out christmas drabble

Knock knock knock.

“Baby?”

Knock knock knock.

“Babe!”

Knock knock knock.

Paulie groaned into her pillow and rolled onto her back, a lot sleepy and a little grumpy.

“Baby!”

Knock knock knock.

Slowly, she came to her senses and it registered with her who the person on the other side of the door was. There was only one person who called her baby and while it usually made her heart flutter and her knees weak, now it made her blood boil. She had wanted to sleep the day away and now that plan was out the window.

Okay, she was definitely more than a little grumpy.

Reluctantly, she disentangled herself from the sheets that had been wrapped around her body like a cocoon and stumbled towards her door. She opened it in one swift motion and glared at Harry who was stood there with antlers on his head and a bright smile on his face.

He had got to be kidding.

“Good morning, sunshine!” he greeted.

“I hate you.”

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m1sc1efmanaged-deactivated20170  asked:

Okay but Draco finding Harry's hoodie from Prisoners of Azkaban. Not knowing what it is so he puts it on and goes to find Harry; who's voice is in his throat realizing its his hoodie.

Draco curled tighter under the covers, relishing in the warmth of shared body heat after hours beneath a thick quilt, until he realized he was alone. Sunlight drifted lazily between the cracks in the curtains and shone on his face; or rather, where his face would be if it weren’t still submerged in cotton and down feathers. As he stretched he made sure not a hint of the crisp air outside of his cocoon could strike even the edge of a toenail.

The very tip of his wand poked beneath the dark blue blanket and moved in time with muffled spells. Sliding along the floor instead of flying at him full speed, Draco’s jeans and slippers crawled beneath the covers with him.

He hissed as the clothes warmed to his temperature, and cursed when he realized Harry must have taken his shirt when he left the room, since it wasn’t included in the pile he’d summoned.

“Fantastic,” he grumbled.

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