Not being able to walk around much,
Matteo spent most of his time now laying in his bed, trying to decide what hurt
more – his bruised ankle or his heart. Though, to be fair, it wasn’t a hard
decision to make. The descripted painkillers were strong enough to numb
whatever pulsating feeling he had in his foot, but there was no such cure for
the pain sitting in his chest. For the last two days, the picture of Luna
leaving him played over and over in his mind. Her back turned towards him. Her
skates constantly moving away from him. Her cold shoulder he knew better than
her eyes by now.
Matteo couldn’t believe Luna had
left, just like that. It never occurred to him as a thing she’d be able to do.
She was so loyal to the ones she cared about, always fighting for them like a
lion mother. Apparently, he no longer belonged to those lucky people.
The bitter sensation of this harsh
truth shattered his heart into pieces. With each day, it became more clear that
he needed Luna, her light, her warmth. Needed it, her, like the earth needed the sun. But as the sun, she moved on
without a second thought.
“How are you feeling?”, his mother
wanted to know whenever she checked up on him. Each time, pretending nothing
was wrong got harder. How she didn’t notice his struggle remained beyond him.
Gastón, however, did as soon as he
came over. Naturally. He noticed it in the time it took Matteo to smile at him,
and in the small sighs that slipped out of his mouth from time to time. The hug
Gastón greeted his best friend with lasted a few seconds longer than usual.
“Does Luna even care that I’m
hurt?”, Matteo asked at one point. He looked miserable on his bed, a bandage
around his foot and his gaze fixed on the ceiling. “Of course she does”, Gastón
hurried to say.
Matteo only snorted. “She didn’t
even look at me once.”
“That’s not true. She did, when we
carried you out. That’s probably why you didn’t notice, but she kept her eyes
on you all the time.” Carefully, Gastón watched his best friend. He remembered
Luna’s worried expression, the guilt and wished Matteo would have seen it too.
“I wish I could believe you.” Matteo
paused, hesitated, before adding: “Did I tell you that she asked Tamara to cut
her hours down immediately after she saw me again?”
For a moment, Gastón was taken aback.
“No, you didn’t.” Then, he took a deep breath and searched for the right words.
“But I’m sure, it’s, uh, nothing. Maybe she panicked, maybe it didn’t have
anything to do with you? Maybe her parents want to make sure she has enough
time for homework?”
“Nothing? This isn’t nothing”,
Matteo replied. The hurt in his eyes hadn’t left just like his hope hadn’t
returned. “She’s running away from me. All the time. I bet she hates me now.”
His voice broke during the last sentence. It wasn’t the first time this idea
struck him. So far, though, he had always pushed it away. Now, it hit him with
full force, making it hard to breathe.
“Matteo, no”, Gastón nearly shouted,
“She doesn’t hate you, she couldn’t. She can’t. If she’d really hate you, she
wouldn’t have been this wrecked about you leaving. You should have seen her,
she wasn’t herself anymore.” Silence filled the room. Only the sound of a clock
slowly ticking in the background broke through. “She still isn’t”, Matteo
There was another question eating
him from the inside. “How much time is she spending on the rink right now?” He
knew the answer when Gastón sighed defeated. “Matteo…” It didn’t stop him. “No.
Tell me. Please. I need to know.”
His heart needed to realize the mess
he had made. And he deserved this, for hurting her, for not being brave enough
to tell his parents the truth and to make up for his mistakes. “She’s catching
up on a lot of training”, Gastón finally admitted. If Matteo tried hard enough,
it didn’t even hurt as much.
He couldn’t sleep the night before
he was allowed to join the training again. Many scenarios ran through his head,
but they all ended in Luna ignoring or leaving him. A few tears around midnight
turned into a constant stream on his cheeks by morning. He got used to it. And
when he finally saw Luna, there were no more tears left.
She turned around at the sound of
his skates. For a moment, he felt the intensity of her eyes on him like a fire
on his skin. He tried not to look back at her while he warmed up. But it was
hard, because he missed her and she still was the most beautiful thing he had
ever seen and she didn’t stop staring.
Suddenly, Luna stopped in front of
him. Gastón had just opened his mouth, probably to make another pun, only to
close it again. Matteo had no time to wonder if she stood here on purpose, if
she wanted something, because their eyes locked and time froze.
However, she turned away quickly,
fixing the ground, his ankle. “How are…”, Luna began. Matteo waited for more to
come, a smile, another glimpse, an end to the question hanging in the air. All
he got was Tamara’s voice, calling them.
She never finished her sentence.
Instead, she fled and skated over to Simón. During training, they focused on
the group choreography. No matter how many times he checked, she stayed as
close to her best friend as possible. Eventually he noted how a smile
reappeared on her face, along with the aura of easiness usually surrounding
her. Once in a while, he gave himself the permission to steal a glimpse at her
just for a minute.
In return, Ámbar shot Matteo prompting glances, as if to say
Make a move, Balsano. That’s when he
turned away. If Luna couldn’t ask him as much as a simple question without
being uncomfortable, she was better off without him. In the end, her happiness
was all that mattered. He’d get over it, over her, and watch from a distance.
One day, maybe even without this lump in his throat, or new tears sparkling in
While the others left for the bar
after Tamara ended the training, Matteo sat down on the bleachers. Soon, the
rink was filled with other skaters and for a while, he got lost observing them.
He didn’t care that he was still wearing his skates, or that he heard Luna
laughing alongside of Simón and Ámbar from a distance. Or at least he tried not
to care about the latter.
Next thing he knew, Gastón joined
him. “Hey, Matteo. No need to make a face like the moon just disappeared.” No
reaction. “What, not even an eyeroll? Come on, you know I’m just kidding! And
anyway, I know you might not believe me, but I just wanted to make sure you
know that the moon itself totally stared at you when you weren’t looking.” That
caught Matteo’s attention. “She did?”
Gastón grinned. “Absolutely.”
Matteo’s head felt dizzy while he searched for a way to make sense of it all.
Looks didn’t change anything. No matter how long or often they occurred. They
weren’t enough to let him hope again. He needed something meaningful, something
solid. Words would do, or actions, a small gesture, but if she only looked at
him, there was nothing to believe in. “Well, Ámbar looked at me too today, but
that doesn’t mean she wants me back”, Matteo commented. At a loss, Gastón
watched him leave.
Luna sighed, before resting her head
on the desk. This biology homework became more and more of a headache, although
she started two hours ago. There hadn’t even been time to go to the rink after
school. As a result, she felt the energy inside piling up. Her hands fidgeted
with everything they got a hold of, and her foot tapped along to an inaudible
melody. Right now, she wished she was less dependent on skating – without being
able to release some of the rising energy, she couldn’t focus for the life of
A memory popped up, of Matteo and
her, how she told him her battery never ran out. Luna sat up again. She needed
to stop thinking about him, there were better things to do. Things less
painful, less upsetting. Just five more minutes of homework, then she’d take a
break. Without that stupid Italian boy on her mind.
No. She knew
that voice, knew it very well. Nevertheless, Luna couldn’t help but turn around
to him with raised eyebrows and an open mouth. He leaned against the doorframe,
wearing a ridiculously good-looking shirt. What was he doing here?
“May I come in?”, Matteo asked.
“Why are you here?” She spat the
words out and hated how her voice got higher at the end. Just seeing him
standing there messed more with her brain than any homework ever could. Him in
her room was something she had only considered a possibility for a very short
amount of time in her life.
“We have training today”, he
explained, “But you didn’t show up, or answered your phone for that matter. And
we can only work on the choreography when everyone’s there.” His eyes avoided
her. Instead, they wandered through the room without really seeing anything. A
question sat on the tip of her tongue, urging to burst out. She felt unable to
ask him, though. Why are you the one to
pick me up? And then, why you, when
you avoided me over the last week just as much as I avoid you? When you won’t
look at me anymore?
“I didn’t, I mean, I was doing
homework”, she said instead. “Can you finish it after training?” Luna nodded.
While she packed her bag, she was glad to have a reason to keep her eyes away
from him. It would be hard enough to get to the Jam&Roller, just alone with
him. Of all things, she needed to stay cool, and most importantly in control.
With her back to Matteo, there was
no way for her to see the shocked expression on Matteo’s face as he discovered
something. Something she later wished he hadn’t noticed at all. “Luna, did you
– did you put your awards away? Because I am pretty sure Tamara isn’t keeping
them at the rink…”For a second, she stared at him, lost for an answer. Since
they met in Cancun, he read her as if she was an open book, and he seriously
had to stop. Hurrying up to get ready (and meanwhile keeping silent), she hoped
to make sure he wouldn’t see the one award standing on her cupboard.
She should have known better. Either
Luna was too slow, or Matteo was too fast. “No way. That’s the one where we
finished second. When Simón didn’t make it in time.”
The confusion was written all over
his face. His jaw had dropped a bit. A frown showed up on his forehead.
Hesitantly, he took a step forward, but stopped himself as soon as he realized
she hadn’t invited him in. Luna sighed. “Come in if you must.” In return, the
left corner of his mouth pulled up, forming the closest thing to his usual
smile she had seen in a while. (Which didn’t justify the fuzzy feeling
spreading in her stomach, or the shiver running over her back.)
His fingers slowly ran over the
metal, the entire way from the top down to the engraving. Luna thought of the
ending to the choreography, how she had allowed herself to get lost in his
eyes. The tender sensation of his lips. His steady grip on her waist, while the
world disappeared around them. Did he remember that moment right this second,
too? She wanted to ask him, more than anything, but she knew better than that.
She rather held her breath, too afraid he might come up with another question.
“Why is it here?” There it was,
hanging in the air but feeling like a punch in the stomach. Luna didn’t mean to
tell him the truth. An excuse sat already on the tip of her tongue. Yet, it
slipped. It slipped because the intensity of his eyes on her burned down the
walls built to protect herself. It slipped because that look was enough to
remind her of how it had been. How it should be now. And because it reminded
her of all the nights she still woke up with his name on her lips.
Prince Charles Xavier is Deputy Commander of the TEF Heartsteel and the newest mission they’ve been assigned starts out less than desirable and quickly goes downhill from there. It’s alright, though, he’ll cope.
It doesn’t help, though, that he’s in unrequited love with his best friend and Commander of the Heartsteel, War-Prince Erik Lehnsherr.
Eliza Taylor said that Clarke couldn’t help falling in love with Lexa because to Clarke she was amazing.
She also said her favourite scene was the only scene in which Clarke smiled this season - where Clarke and Lexa are just blissfully happy, Clarke smiling and tracing Lexa’s tattoos and a sleepy peaceful Lexa so smol, so vulnerable just enjoying each other’s presence.
Also she mentioned how her and Alycia both wanted to make sure the story they portrayed was beautiful and full of love as it is something you don’t see on the show and that they don’t underestimate the effect it has had on people.
Recently read my friend Harmony’s Misawa fanfic “A Chronicle Of the Sun” and it was probably the first fanfic I’ve properly read since I don’t often read them (I like looking at pictures ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)✧) and it was super cute!!
So I drew (one of) my favourite scene >< (Also liked the end where Kuramochi is like “gross” but yeah XD) Also, this is probably the most intimate scene I’ve ever drawn hahah///// BLUSHES