alligator costume

6

Finished this dragon tail commission last night. It’s got brown anodized aluminum on top with a yellow/gold anodized aluminum underbelly. The commissioner wanted it based on an alligator character, so I could call it a gator tail, but I still think of these as dragon tails.

I added some backwards-turned scales into the pattern to mimic the double row of bumpy armored scales that gators have down their spine. I think it turned out pretty well. It’s a subtle effect from certain angles, but when the light catches it from other directions the inverted scales catch the light really well. 

31 inches long, so slightly shorter than my standard pattern. It weighs in at 2 pounds 10 ounces.

I’m currently not taking more commissions for these until I get through my queue of outstanding orders, but you can still check out my page of information about them if you’d like.

College gothic
  • You are walking to class.Someone wearing a full alligator costume is walking leisurely in front of you. You look around to see if anyone else is as confused as you are. No one else seems to notice anything out of the ordinary. You begin to wonder if you are the only one who can see them.
  • You exit a coffee shop and enter the building where your next class is scheduled, only to find another coffee shop. Thinking you are mistaken, you attempt to exit this building only to find that the exit leads directly into another coffee shop. You go to the bathroom. Inside, there is another coffee shop.
  • While relaxing on the lawn with your classmates, you are approached by a squirrel. “Look away,” someone says. “Don’t make eye contact.”
  • You enter a building in attempt to find your advisor’s office. You find it, but when you are done you cannot find the entrance through which you initially came in. You roam the halls for what seems like hours, but you still cannot find the exit. When you finally find an exit, you are halfway across campus from the building you initially entered.
  • There is a large group of girls sitting on the lawn all wearing shirts that have writing in a language you don’t understand. Upon close inspection, you find that every one of the girls looks exactly the same.
  • Large areas along your daily commute to class are closed off by fences nearly three times as high as you are. Large banners that read “COMING SOON” prevent you from seeing whatever is beyond the fence. You ask a man standing by the only entrance to the fenced-in area what is coming soon. He doesn’t answer. You repeat your question. The man looks at you, frightened, and flees back inside the fence.
Mind Jump - Multiple Choice Answers
  • ENTJ: What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?
  • INTP: An investigator, a circus alligator, a human in an alligator costume, an alligator that just ate someone wearing a vest which got stuck onto its body, a sentient alligator, an intelligent alien that looks like an alligator.
  • ENTJ: An investigator.
  • INTP: -___-
3

My true form. Multiple children made crying faces, and many more screamed and ran away, or made roaring noises at me. There were shouts of “Crocodile!” “Alligator!” “Dinosaur!” and “Lizard!” It was great.

This is my preferred method of interacting with children (and strangers in general), which really illustrates how my ideal career is “neighborhood witch all the children are scared of.”

55 Classic Improv Scene Initiations Featuring Alligators
  1. “Jeremy, there’s an alligator in the kitchen, and I think you know why.”
  2. “Thanks for coming on such short notice, I know you’ve been dealing with an alligator problem.”
  3. “Well, I managed to pick up most of what was left of your alligator.”
  4. “Madam Windocker, are all these paintings of alligators?”
  5. “To be honest, no, this was my first time eating alligator.”
  6. “Gentlemen, I think you all know the esteemed Dr. Alligator.”
  7. “Alligator, alligator, alligator, crocodile, alligator…Hold on just a second!”
  8. “The crone waved her wrinkled fingers and then an alligator tail just started to…grow.”
  9. “I go to work, and clock in, and clock out, and every day I wonder if I was supposed to be an alligator instead.”
  10. “You’ve clamped down on my heart, Riley, like an alligator without a sense of personal boundaries.”
  11. “I’m afraid the alligator will have to wait outside.”
  12. “If we try to swim for it, the alligators will gorge themselves on two of us, but the rest are likely to make it.”
  13. “That alligator-skin clutch — why, that was Mom’s!”
  14. “Relax, Dennis. Be an alligator, floating in the reeds.”
  15. “You know I won’t rest until the partners of this firm make me Senior Alligator.”
  16. “Rutherford and I were just admiring your very old alligator.”
  17. “I’ve never seen a sexy alligator costume before, but you really pull it off!”
  18. “You and I are both crusty alligators in the big old swamp of humanity.”
  19. “Before we start…my safe word will be ‘alligator.’”
  20. “You can’t hide behind that alligator forever, Julius!”
  21. “My friends, you misunderstand! The most dangerous game is, in fact, alligator.”
  22. “Four score and seven years ago, our alligators brought forth on this alligator a new alligator.”
  23. “Is that an alligator on your shirt or are you just happy to see me?”
  24. “Actually I can say that, because my grandfather was one-eighth alligator.”
  25. “Let’s go, Alligators! Eat the other team!”
  26. “I made you a birthday cake, and of course, I shaped it like an alligator.”
  27. “Alligator, honey, baby, sweetie, they’re just bullies. You’re still my precious muffin.”
  28. “Sometimes I feel like you only love me for my alligator impression.”
  29. “And for my third wish, I wish everyone else on Earth was an alligator!”
  30. “I can’t believe that alligators made it to Mars before humans. Maybe it’s time to just give up.”
  31. “The new car? It’s OK, but it’s clear that the last owner was an alligator.”
  32. “Mr. President, the alligator will see you now.”
  33. “Get inside! The plague of alligators will start any minute!”
  34. “Wow, you really did have all your teeth replaced with alligator teeth.”
  35. “If you wade through a swamp, what do you expect? The alligators just let you pass?”
  36. “How many alligators does one person need, Barbara?”
  37. “Oh, I’m terribly sorry, I didn’t realize you were still in here with your alligator.”
  38. “Captain, the sonar blip appears to be an alligator.”
  39. “Becky, your father and I are concerned that you don’t realize you’re dating an alligator.”
  40. “Santa brought me a magic whistle that forces any hidden alligators to reveal themselves.”
  41. “Kensington, why aren’t you dressed yet? Put on your alligator suit!”
  42. “This neighborhood was great until the alligators started moving in.”
  43. “Everything in this meal was made from various disgusting parts of a single alligator, and let me tell you, it was a chore!”
  44. “Gerard, this is the third time this week you’ve shown up handcuffed to an alligator.”
  45. “That was me! I was the voice of the cartoon alligator!”
  46. “I want some alone time with you. Without the alligator.”
  47. “Please forgive my granddad. My family has always had a superstition about alligators.”
  48. “Wowza! I’ve seen alligators with better skin.”
  49. “Oh, no, I hope that alligator outside wasn’t yours.”
  50. “No, honey, those pants don’t make you look like an alligator at all!”
  51. “I’m worried that those fools are going to make that — that alligator the next Pope.”
  52. “Everything I have to say in this arbitration will be delivered via my alligator.”
  53. “Here’s your problem. You’ve got most of an alligator crammed in there!”
  54. “We don’t use polygraphs in this precinct. Bring in the alligator.”
  55. “Alligator Kaszmierski, private eye. I’ve been watching you from a half-submerged position.”