alley wine

anonymous asked:

Hey, so I just started the books but I want to know if dany ever thinks about her mom in the books. It's sad how she has never mentioned her mom on the show

Hi :)

Daenerys never knew her mother - Queen Rhaella died giving her birth. So she doesn’t have any memory of her, but sometimes she thinks about her and the family she never knew.

Her mother had died birthing her, and for that her brother Viserys had never forgiven her.

My mother died giving me birth, and my father and my brother Rhaegar even before that. I would never have known so much as their names if Viserys had not been there to tell me. He was the only one left. The only one. He is all I have.

Her father had been slain before she was born, and her splendid brother Rhaegar as well. Her mother had died bringing her into the world while the storm screamed outside. Gentle Ser Willem Darry, who must have loved her after a fashion, had been taken by a wasting sickness when she was very young. Her brother Viserys, Khal Drogo who was her sun-and-stars, even her unborn son, the gods had claimed them all. They will not have my dragons, Dany vowed. They will not.

After she exiles Ser Jorah:

He’s gone, then. My father and my mother, my brothers, Ser Willem Darry, Drogo who was my sun-and-stars, his son who died inside me, and now Ser Jorah …  

There is also a small backstory about Rhaella’s crown - it was the only object Viserys and Daenerys had from their mother, and their family, really. But Viserys had to sell it in the end - because they were poor, starving, homeless, and they needed the little money they got from the crown to survive. Daenerys recalls that from the moment Viserys sold it, he was never the same anymore.

Now even the coin they had gotten from Mother’s crown had gone. In the alleys and wine sinks of Pentos, they called her brother “the beggar king.” Dany did not want to know what they called her.

When Viserys sold their mother’s crown, the last joy had gone from him, leaving only rage.

And Daenerys refuses to sell her own crown (that she was gifted with in Qarth), thinking of Viserys and how much selling their mother’s crown affected hm.

The crown was the only offering she’d kept. The rest she sold, to gather the wealth she had wasted on the Pureborn. Xaro would have sold the crown too — the Thirteen would see that she had a much finer one, he swore — but Dany forbade it. “Viserys sold my mother’s crown, and men called him a beggar. I shall keep this one, so men will call me a queen.” And so she did, though the weight of it made her neck ache.

After Ser Barristan joins Daenerys, they talk about her family (because he knew them) from time to time.

One day you must tell me all. The good and the bad. There is some good to be said of my father, surely?

There is, Your Grace. Of him, and those who came before him. Your grandfather Jaehaerys and his brother, their father Aegon, your mother … and Rhaegar. Him most of all.

Ser Barristan went on. ”I saw your father and your mother wed as well. Forgive me, but there was no fondness there, and the realm paid dearly for that, my queen.

Why did they wed if they did not love each other?

Your grandsire commanded it. A woods witch had told him that the prince was promised would be born of their line.“ 

On her way to marry Hizdahr, she also asks Barristan to tell her of her parents’ loves:

Tell me,” Dany said, as the procession turned toward the Temple of the Graces, “if my father and my mother had been free to follow their own hearts, whom would they have wed?

It was long ago. Your Grace would not know them.

You know, though. Tell me.

The old knight inclined his head. “The queen your mother was always mindful of her duty.” He was handsome in his gold-and-silver armor, his white cloak streaming from his shoulders, but he sounded like a man in pain, as if every word were a stone he had to pass. “As a girl, though … she was once smitten with a young knight from the stormlands who wore her favor at a tourney and named her queen of love and beauty. A brief thing.

What happened to this knight?

He put away his lance the day your lady mother wed your father. Afterward he became most pious, and was heard to say that only the Maiden could replace Queen Rhaella in his heart. His passion was impossible, of course. A landed knight is no fit consort for a princess of royal blood.

Rhaegar is more often present in Daenerys’ thoughts, but she does think of her mother Queen Rhaella too.

anonymous asked:

Please Kara planning a birthday party for Lena and having a REALLY hard time keeping it a secret

“I just want it to be perfect, Alex,” Kara tells her as Alex plays absently with her hair, Sisters’ Night winding down into Sleepy Cuddles Night.

“And it will be, Kara,” Alex promises, because Alex knows that feeling. That feeling of wanting to be the perfect girlfriend: even though Maggie keeps promising her that she doesn’t need her to be perfect, she just needs her to be… her. And that, ironically, is perfect. 

Alex sighs and smiles and bends down to kiss her sister’s forehead. “You just can’t spill the beans about it, okay?” Kara groans, and Alex laughs, because the kindness that originated this surprise birthday party comes naturally to Kara. Lying doesn’t.

So the next day, when Lena asks if Kara is free this weekend, Kara reddens. Lena’s birthday weekend. Not that she told Kara it’s her birthday. Not in the typical way, anyway. When they were talking about star signs, she’d mentioned it, off-hand, casual, months ago.

She didn’t expect Kara to remember.

No one really ever did.

But of course Kara remembers.

Keep reading

A Song of Ice and Fire: Daenerys Stormborn [ENFJ]

UNOFFICIAL TYPING by lover-of-grey-matters

Extroverted Feeling (Fe): The first function Dani developed is the one with which she could navigate the emotional atmosphere around her. She had to probe Viserys’s mood and adapt herself accordingly ’she knew better than to question her brother when he wove his webs of dream. His anger was a terrible thing when roused. Viserys called it “waking the dragon.”’ She also learned to read people quickly. She assessed Illyrio to be an opportunist  ’It was also said that he’d never had a friend he wouldn’t cheerfully sell for the right price.‘ her reading of people and the surroundings made her more pragmatics than Viserys, who was still stuck inside the personal mythical idea of Westeros and Targaryan superiority that he learned. ( ’In the alleys and wine sinks of Pentos, they called her brother “the beggar king.” Dany did not want to know what they called her.’ ’Dany listened to the talk in the streets, and she heard these things…’ ’It seems to me that a queen who trusts no one is as foolish as a queen who trusts everyone. Every man I take into my service is a risk, I understand that, but how am I to win the Seven Kingdoms without such risks?’)

Dani, after being in a ‘healthy’ emotional environment in the Vaes Dothrak where there was no more perpetual threat of abuse, continued to sync to external values. She quickly learned to please Drogo, physically and mentally. She built rapports with all of her handmaiden, and soon, her people and Missandei. As she began her conquest, her first mood is talk through people and often, emotionally manipulate them and luring them into a false sense of security. She let the slavers think her harmless and gullible in Astapor. She does the same trick again at Yunkai (’…that I wanted their answers on the morrow. I made no promises about tonight. The Stormcrows will be arguing about my offer. The Second Sons will be drunk on the wine I gave Mero. And the Yunkai'i believe they have three days. We will take them under cover of this darkness’)

Cultural assimilation continued to play a role in her plot. She absorbs the external values and mirrors them instinctively. She doesn’t make emotional appeal with an endgame of getting things done in the long run, it’s second nature to her. When in Dothraki, she quickly becomes a proper Khaleesi, not just acting like one, she uptakes there values. The Dothraki Stallion along with the seven becomes her god (Dany said a quick prayer, begging the Warrior for courage and the Dothraki horse god for strength. She made herself walk forward.)  At Quarth, she dresses like a Quartheen and followed the Quartheen protocol thoroughly to gain support. At Meereen, she dons her ‘floppy ears’ and wears tokar, hating it all the while. She did not marry Hizdar in the book on gunpoint like the show, she observes all the customs necessary.  Dani wants to belong, desperately. She keeps looking for a home, and hates being an outsider.

Her empathy does not stem from her identifying with the slaves, she feels it objectively anyway.  For example, when the bloody flux infected people set up camp, she went down to clean them, even when she never felt sick in her life (Targaryens were untroubled by the pestilences that afflicted common men, and so far as she could tell, it was true. She could remember being cold and hungry and afraid, but never sick.) Book Dani does not scream blunt force. She dances around and sugarcoats (I am only a young girl who know little of (insert something here)). She is polite to like, everyone. Even when she doubts their alliance. Dani’s feelings are not ingrained,  they are real-time. When she saw a child was killed by her dragons, she quickly caged them. But she literally issued torture order for another girl because she was not there in front of her, the dead Mossandor was, and that demanded justice first. 

Her Fe, at one point becomes problematic. She loved all the children that were supposed to be her hostage and the Harpy seized the fact that she will not harm Meerenese lives. She kept trying to please the people while she continually became unhappy. She literally allowed a man to spit on her face when SHE WAS A QUEEN and she let him go. She even lets Brown Ben Plumm go after betraying her, and she did not punish anyone because she hated the idea of appearing as the Butcher Queen.

Introverted Intuition (Ni): Dani’s symbolism is very personalized. Red door = home imagery ran all through her chapters. She promptly named her Dragons after her brothers even when she had little 'sensory’ impressions of them (the myth of Rhaeger did not come into play here, or the cruelty of Viserys), but she did it because of the concept(the green one Rhaegal 'cause the Trident was green where Rhaeger fell, Viseryon will be the prince Viserys was not).

She absorbed the warning Quaith gave her without any filtering and started scanning everyone for the 'three treason’ with intuition, rather than sensory evidences.  Dani, after the torturing experience of riding first with the Khalasaar and getting bruises from horseback, dreamed of a dragon and felt empowered. Then again, she took another leap of faith and woke dragons. Then her trip in the House of the Undying in the book was another Ni trip. She knew the Pree was false Pree, the Wizards are false wizard, the first door on the left in the last door on the right..all through her intuition. Her Se was feeding her clues all along the way, but being an intuitive, she is not aware of it.

Her plan with the Unsullied, the siege of Yunkai by getting the sellsword captain drunk and relying the slaves will  throw off their shackles, she kept acting on 'hunches’ up to the third book and her hunches kept paying off, until…

Extroverted Sensing (Se): Her Se is part of her loop. The Fe-Se loop first appears during Drogo’s illness and she ignores all intuition and jumps to act. Then it appears for a longer time in Meereen, and she is stuck into taking desperate measures to get her people behind her (cage the dragons, take children as hostage, then treat those children like royalty, marry Hizdar, agree to slavery in Yunkai and Astapor, open the pits, let the sick camp, then cut the camps off behind the wall…). All the while, she slowly kept losing consciousness with their long-term Ni goal. At first, getting stuck in Meereen only fueled her main objective, in her mind, she needs to be the right kind of Queen first (which overlaps with her theme, the one who fought for ending the slavery of the living will fight the ultimate slavers of humanity). She, in the books, in constantly weighing in her vision of going back 'home’ with her current situation, except she cannot leave with her people like this (Fe). Then as situation spiraled out of control, Westeros took backseat.

Introverted Thinking (Ti): Her Ti is baby Ti. It makes appearance sporadically and she cannot explain her logic because its subjective (like the one about not being a Butcher Queen). After a long loop, it finally kicks off at the final chapter of DwD, when she realizes that Meereen is not home.  Then her Ni makes a comeback, and she remember 'who she is meant to be’ and embraces fire and blood.

Note: I am talking about book Dani. Show Dani is with her constant screaming of '“I want my dragons,” “I have dragons,” “The throne is mine,” “I will take what is mine with fire and blood,” and zero people-pleasing is another creature. Show Dani can be a higher Se but book Dani is higher Ni through and through. 

“It was also said that [Illyrio]’d never had a friend he wouldn’t cheerfully sell for the right price. Dany listened to the talks in the streets, and she heard these things, but she knew better than to question her brother when he wove his webs of dream.”

“In the alleys and wine sinks of Pentos, they called her brother “the beggar king”.”

“Arya had loved nothing better than to sit at her father’s table and listen to them talk. She had loved listening to the men on the benches too; to freeriders tough as leather, courtly knights and bold young squires, grizzled old men-at-arms.”

“I don’t like the queen,” Arya said casually.”

I love that even at the beginning (these quotes all come from the very beginning of AGOT), Arya and Dany are so similar. They both know not to take at face value what is said to their faces, to listen what is whispered behind their backs (from people that most of the nobility thinks not worthy of attention btw), and thus are able to see right through the lies served to them (by Illyrio to Dany and Cersei to Arya). Throughout all the books they both show a startling acuteness of mind, a perceptiveness a lot of often older characters lack, and that from a very young age.

(In other words, my girls ain’t taking any of your bullshit.)

Beautiful Distraction

Table of Contents 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

Chapter o4.  Addiction

One day, while Tao was at work, you skipped over to the supermarket to pick up some onions, pork, and soy sauce to cook him some Chinese Soysauce Steak.  Pushing the cart around, you skipped along happily, grabbing a bit of extra ingredients like eggs, honey, and ketchup in case you wanted to make something else when you got home.  In the juice aisle, you pulled a carton of orange juice but as you moved to place it into the cart, from the corner of your eyes, you caught sight of a few glass bottles.  You stood still in place.

Don’t do it. 

But they were calling for you.

Don’t do it.  Think of Tao.  Don’t hurt him, ________ah.

But he didn’t even love you.  He doesn’t need you. 

You took a step closer to the wine, the carton of orange juice fell from your hands, splattering all over the floor. 

Don’t do it, you promised Tao. 

You stared down to your promise ring. 

“I hope we can last another hundred days, two hundred…three hundred…until eternity,” Tao’s words replayed in your mind.

But he was just saying it out of pity. 

Your fingers curled around the neck of the bottle. 

On the way home, you contemplated sneaking it into the house but a look at your watch told you the chances of bumping into Tao coming home was quite high.  So instead, you U-turned into a random alley, popped the cap off the bottle, and began to pour it down your throat.  Oh, how good it felt.  How much you had missed this taste – this satisfying distraction.  It was perfect.  You finished it within two minutes.  Sighing, you waved goodbye to the bottle and threw it down the trash. 

If Tao noticed, he didn’t say anything.  All you knew was that you smacked your lip shut when he kissed you as soon as you got home.  Instead of talking and asking about his day, you zigzagged to the bathroom to brush your teeth to get rid of the alcoholic taste in your mouth, in case Tao wanted to make out. 

Out of guilt, you immediately got to work on cooking your meal for Tao.  But instead of complaining about his hunger, like you expected, he waited patiently by the kitchen counter as you rushed the preparation for dinner.  In the midst of it, your semi-hazed mind caused your head to whirl and you accidentally cut your finger.  You couldn’t even feel the pain – didn’t even know until your boyfriend scurried over, grabbed your hand, and applied pressure onto the wound. 

“W-what are you doing?” you asked, but when you blinked a few times to clear your mind, you finally saw the trickling crimson red liquid that seeped out. 

“Follow me,” he said.

Still holding onto your finger, Tao guided you into the bedroom. 

“A-are we going to have sex right now?” you heard your slurred voice question. 

But instead, your lover hurriedly snatched a first aid box from a shelf and patted the edge of the bed for you to sit down.  You obediently do so, still wondering why he looked so worried because you couldn’t even feel it.  But you did as soon as he poured some sterilizing alcohol over the wound.  You hissed, jerking your hand back but Tao held it tightly so that the cut wouldn’t bleed profusely.  Biting your lip, you observed as he cringed every time you so much as to wince or flinch when he applied medication over your finger.  When he was done bandaging your wound, your finger basically looked like a wrapped up spring roll.  You held it up to your face and giggled.  Beside you, Tao sighed, took your hand, and brought it against his lips.

“Do you want to go to the hospital?” he asked, sweetly stroking the bandaged finger. 

“It’s only a finger, Zitao.  You’re being overly concerned,” you spoke.

“Only a finger?!  It’s not only a finger.  It’s my girlfriend’s finger,” he reasoned.

You rolled your eyes at his over exaggeration and mumbled, “Thank God it wasn’t on my left hand though or else the blood would have stained my ring”. 

Tao paused the stroking of your injured finger to look up at you as if you just said the most ridiculous thing ever. 

“W-what?” you stuttered, recoiling due to his intimidating look. 

As you do, your stomach grumbled.  With a sigh, Tao kissed your bandaged finger one last time and stood up to go to the kitchen.  You followed him, grabbing a knife to continue chopping the bell peppers when your handsome lover snatched the knife away from you. 

“Babe, behave and sit down over there.  I’ll cook tonight,” he spoke. 

Sensing that you were about to complain, he dropped the knife onto the cutting board and physically scooted you over to sit at the diner table.  From there, you finally had the down time to scrutinize your finger.  Despite it being wrapped in about twelve layers, you could already see a tinge of pink from the top layer.  Curious, you pressed onto the wound and instantly doubled over in pain.  You’re not sure how Tao knew, because you were biting your tongue not to cry out in pain, but he did.  The tall male rushed from the kitchen and knelt down in front of you. 

“Babe, are you okay?  Do you want to go to the hospital to get stitches?” he asked frantically.

“No, no I’m fine.  Don’t worry about it,” you brushed off. 

During dinner, you finally realized how inconvenient it was to injure your dominant hand.  You tried to pick up food but your chopsticks kept slipping from your hand.  So you took a fork to stab at the steak, but in doing so an intense pain radiated up your finger and you whimpered in anguish, startling your lover.  He ended up feeding you.  And for a moment, you almost forgot that you were supposed to be Annie and not ________.  But the image on Tao’s phone background flashed in your mind, reminding you that you were only a distraction. 

 

 

 

 

After two weeks of hiding in alleys to sip your wine and not getting caught by Tao, you get the foolish idea to actually sneak a few bottles back home.  Disguising the bottles as just another grocery bag, you cautiously tiptoed into Tao and your love den.

“Zitao…are you home?” you called out but only silence responded to you so you sighed in relief.

With your bottles held tightly against your chest, you scurried off to the bedroom.  You stuffed them into a shoebox and hid it under the bed, in record speed, fearing that your lover would return any minute now.  You internally gave yourself a pat on the shoulder for completing your mission. 

With a foolish grin, you dusted off your hands and stalked off to the living room to wait for Tao to come home.  When he didn’t return home within an hour, your eyelids swung and you fell asleep on the sofa. 

You jolted upright, stunned that you even fell asleep.  Immediately, you turned to the clock to search for the time and realize that it was already eight in the evening.  Tao must be home by now.  So you got up to look for him.

“Zitao?” you called, opening the bedroom door but he wasn’t there.

So you headed for the bathroom but the door was opened and no one was inside. 

Strange…Tao was normally home by five.  You dug into your pocket for your phone but there weren’t any missed calls or messages.  At this point you began to panic that perhaps he got into a freak car accident.  Frantic, you dialed his number but his voicemail automatically sounded, notifying you that his phone was off.  With furrowed eyebrows and a racing heart, you threw on your jacket, ready to go out and look for him yourself.  But from the corner of your eye, you caught sight of the calendar that hung along the living room wall.  A golden star reflected light from the ceiling chandelier.  Under it read, “Annie’s Birthday”.  Your fingers grazed over the star.  A tear fell down your cheeks and you wiped it away with your finger.  With a sad smile, you stripped from your jacket, threw it messily onto the sofa, and trotted over to the bedroom to reunite with your always-available distraction. 

It tasted bitter and cold but so, so good.  Laughing like a maniac, you poured the contents down your throat.  Tears streamed down your face but you continued to laugh and toast to the invisible ghost in front of you.  Seated on the floor, with your knees curled up to your chest, you bent your head back and chugged the alcohol down.  It wasn’t like Tao was returning until the morning so it didn’t matter – you were going all out. 

The bookshelf in front of you rippled and transformed into blotches of yellows, greens, and reds. 

“Wahh, so pretty!” you complimented, pointing at the swirling colors in front of you like some orchestra conductor. 

Stumbling, you stood in front of the long mirror.  You laughed.

“Wow.  So pretty.  Hi Annie!” you giggled but the tears continued to drown your face. 

Her hair was so perfectly wavy, framing her tiny heart-shaped face.  Her laces, so feathery and soft, fluttered like butterflies against her eyes.  Even her fingers as she touched yours against the glass were flawlessly slender and thin. 

“Zitao loves you a lot…” you slurred faltering backward.

Your right leg caught the pant leg of your other leg and you were sent crashing down onto the tiled floors.  The wine bottle in your hand shattered into thousands of small pieces.  Maroon liquid spilled out, soaking the sleeve of your olive blouse.  Swirls of crimson seeped out from your palm, mixing with that of the red wine.  But you don’t feel the pain until much, much later.  And when you do, you merely chuckled before closing your eyes welcoming the embrace of an alternate reality. 

You woke up at around four in the morning, in the same position you were in before, only this time the pain in your palm was so raw and unforgiving.  Biting your lip, you took a random shirt on the bed and wrapped it around the wound to momentarily stop the antagonizing pain.  That’s when you noticed the mess in the room.  The flooded floorboards of red wine.  The shattered green shards that covered every inch, every centimeter of the place.  And worse of all, the mirror in front of you had toppled over during your delirious rampage.  Cautiously, you lifted it up, praying to the Heavens that it was left unscratched.  To your dismay, a long crack ran down from the top right corner, diverged into twenty smaller cracks, and ended at the bottom left end. 

“No.  No.  No,” you mumbled as you helplessly stood there panicking for a solution. 

You came to the conclusion to first clean up the mess on the floor then worry about the mirror…and last about your bleeding hand.  Racing to the bathroom, you grabbed a towel and roughly collected the green shards in a quick stroke.  You watched silently as the white towel soaked in red wine like some watercolor painting.  A few of the glass managed to poke through the fabric and cut you on your fingertips but you bit back the pain and shook the shards into the garbage can.  When the floors were clean, you sat back down onto the bed to stare into the broken mirror.  Hundred of your own reflection stared back at you and if your hand weren’t already injured, you would have lunged toward it, clawing the living life out of the hideous reflection.  But instead, you lifted the mirror and discarded it at the junkyard alleyway.  On your way back upstairs, you faintly see a red car pull up and into the garage.  Tao.  With widened eyes, you immediately began to run upstairs.  Your hands shook, causing you to drop your keys several times but when you finally managed to get in, you slammed the door shut and darted into the bedroom to make sure all evidence of your late night addiction were erased. 

You rushed into the bathroom, turned on the faucet, and let the water wash your bleeding palm.  You whimpered.

“________ah, why are you still up?” Tao voice sounded from the bedroom. 

You clasped your uninjured hand over your mouth so that you wouldn’t make any sound.  Footsteps came your way and that’s when you realized you hadn’t locked the door.  But before you could get to it, Tao had already swung the door open so you frantically hid your bleeding hand on your back and feigned a smile.

“H-hey…” you greeted. 

“Hey, Babe,” Tao greeted and leaned in to give you a peck of the lips.  Your lips quivered against his.  He straightened up and narrowed his eyes at you.  Tears brimmed in your eyes, thinking he had probably tasted wine along as lips but instead, he grabbed your wrist and brought it up to his face. 

“W-what happened?” he stuttered seeing the cuts along your hand. 

“I-I…” you looked away to avoid his eye contact, “I broke your mirror by accident”.

Tao dragged you into the bedroom, sat you down on the edge of the bed, and said, “Wait”.

You fidgeted around nervously.  He returned with a first aid kit and some tweezers.

“Does it hurt?” he asked, looking worriedly at you.  You shook your head but he continued to grimace and hissed as he pinched the small glass shards one at a time out of your palm.  He doesn’t even question why the shards were green if they were from the mirror.  You hung your head not making a sound even when he poured alcohol over the wound to disinfect it. 

“All good,” he said after bandaging the wound, “Be careful next time, okay?” 

You could only nod.

“I’m going to go shower.  Go to sleep first,” he said patting your hand before getting up to head to the bathroom.

“Okay…” you said but your voice cracked.  Tao turned around, walked back to you, and kissed your forehead.

“Good night,” he said sweetly. 

“Good…night,” you responded. 

 

 

a/n: Panda Unnie had a rough day today.  It would cheer me up if you guys like this post and leave me a message though.    

And this story only makes me die a little more on the inside.