we have finally found him
My mom and one of my uncles do family research because why the fuck not. Apparently through the research of church books, family trees, and now the most recently DNA tests we’ve found a number of interesting ancestors and distant relatives, lords, queens, emperors, horse thieves and a man who was at least once named “a devil for a priest” for his charming personality.
Besides dead relatives, websites that specialise in this also enable you to get the names and facebook contact some of the living people who both share your ancestry and are also doing family research, and apparently both my mom and uncle have found a big, nebulous flock of interesting people of all walks of life who share some of our ancestors.
But now they found him.
The black sheep of the family.
See, due to a number of reasons they may or may not have taught you in history class, lots of people from Europe migrated to the United States in large waves some generations back. They were met with some hostility, endured, adapted and contributed to the culture and lived happily ever after. Many finns were amongst them. Including the dude who is apparently my 15th cousin once removed of something of the sort.
And now that you know this snowflake’s backstory, here’s the more important half: He voted for Trump because he hates immigrants. He adores Finland, he adores America, he is proud of his heritage and he voted for Trump because immigrants will ruin America. Someone on facebook pointed out the hypocrisy of this as he, too, is a descendant of immigrants.
And he was like yeah, that’s why I’m moving back to Finland.
So allow me to recap: This man is from Wisconsin. He was born in the United States, as were his parents. He speaks english as a first language and is trying to study finnish as a second language, and according to my mother his grammar is atrocious. His plan is to migrate to Finland because immigrants are ruining America.
Bob from Wisconsin, I don’t think you’re going to like it here.