all the wine is all for him

I need a teachers AU but one where it’s all about the staffroom shenanigans.
Like a bad teachers AU.
(I’ve been watching Big school on Netflix) 
Emma the new Math teacher joins the school.
You’ve got History teacher Mary Margaret who’s so sweet and innocent but the school is still running riot with the scandal of her and Shop teacher David caught boinking in the workshop after school last term. 
They insist it’s all false but they’re now living together this term.
Killian’s the sarcastic English teacher who’s often in the gymnasium with PE teacher Robin drinking rum at lunchtime.
Robin’s sleeping with Principal Regina who’s a fan of boxed wine in her office. She insists it’s cranberry juice. Zelena’s her assistant who gives her all the gossip. 
August the music teacher who thinks he’s famous but mostly just smokes pot before, during and after school time. No one else really gets him but he throws a good party.
Belle’s the school counsellor who’s too positive for her own good, but swears like a sailor and rags on the school kids when drunk.
Of course, Killian develops an instant big crush on Emma… and the whole term is will they/won’t they/will they ever catch a break and manage to finally get together without being interrupted?

Just a whole series on these guys getting into compromising situations, fights, squabbles, competitions, and just being completely done with teaching. 

We talk a lot about Yuuri having to reconcile his idea of Viktor with the real Viktor–that is, Yuuri has this flawless, wonderful ideal of Viktor in his head which has to sort of be cut down to fit the person that Viktor really is. Which is a healthy part of their relationship, and which I completely agree is something Yuuri has to face at some point during that first summer.

But I think there’s also something to be said about Yuuri realizing that some of the horrible things he’s heard about Viktor through the skating community grapevine are not so true.

Yuuri, despite what he says, is much closer to is idol than most people ever get. If Viktor is a movie star, Yuuri is the secondary character–he’s there, and a lot of people definitely know he’s there, and he knows enough people who also know Viktor for the gossip mill to really get churnin sometimes.

I also think that at the back of every person who has ever had a celebrity crush’s mind is a little voice saying, “Never meet your heroes,” and Yuuri Katsuki is terrified of that little voice, and it contributes to the distance he keeps from Viktor–because at some point, that much distance from someone you’re facing off against in international competitions has got to be just a little bit purposeful.

So cue Viktor coming into his life all of a sudden one day, and all Yuuri can think about are the terrible awful no good very bad things people have told him about Viktor and the kind of person Viktor is.

“Fuck Viktor Nikiforov,” an older skater had told him after Skate America, six glasses into a box of wine and bitter as hell about missing the podium. “No, really, fuck him. The Russians are paying off the ISU to keep him at the top. He isn’t even that talented. I hear–I hear he doesn’t even train. I hear he just shows up and fucking does whatever and they give him gold because he’s Viktor Nikiforov.”

“I…don’t think…” Yuuri frowned at his own glass of wine. “I mean…that couldn’t be true.” He glances at Phichit next to him. “Could it?”

“Sour grapes,” Phichit advises, and Yuuri isn’t as familiar with English idioms at that point, so he thinks Phichit is talking about the wine.

Yuuri mostly forgets about it, but somewhere in the back of his mind–he can’t stop thinking about it. He watches and rewatches Viktor’s old programs and wonders to himself if the reason he thinks they’re so good is because he’s watching them through rose-tinted glasses.

Yuuri and Phichit are suffering through finals and trying to survive through twenty-hour days of nothing but studying and skating. They lay themselves on the bleachers one afternoon while they’re supposed to be doing warm ups.

“What if I just quit school and became and underwater basket weaver,” Yuuri mumbles directly into the metal seat of the bleacher. “That would be fine, right?”

“WWVND,” Phichit replies. “What Would Viktor Nikiforov Do.”

“You’re right,” Yuuri sighs.

“Viktor Nikiforov is dumber than a box of rocks,” says of the other members of the club as she skates by. “You know he never even finished high school? I mean, what counts as high school in a country like Russia. The guy probably thinks two plus two equals borscht.”

“That’s not…” Yuuri smushes his nose against the bleacher. “Hey, that’s not…”

“FUCK OFF OLIVIA,” Phichit shrieks across the rink, and Celestino definitely hears. They have to do twenty minutes of line drills. 

“What Would Viktor Nikiforov Do, right boys?” asks Olivia as she watches Yuuri try not to heave after Celestino finally releases them from their Sisyphean torture.

“I’m gonna fucking kill her,” Phichit says, and he sounds so deeply serious that Yuuri is sincerely worried.

Several weeks later, someone mentions Viktor within earshot of Phichit and he jokingly says, “Watch what you say, that’s Yuuri’s future husband you’re talking about,” and it sort of makes Yuuri want to hit him but mostly makes Yuuri blush.

“Really?” replies that someone. “I don’t know about that, Yuuri. I wouldn’t touch that guy with a thirty foot pole. He sleeps around. Probably has all kinds of nasty stuff going on down there.”

“Oh, whatever,” Phichit says, rolling his eyes. “Like you would know.”

Yuuri ducks his head back into his book and tries not to think about it.

These are the things that Yuuri holds in the back of his mind about Viktor, the worries that travel with him anywhere he has even the chance of encountering Viktor Nikiforov. 

‘Never meet your heroes’ becomes something of the unspoken mantra of Yuuri’s life. 

Then Viktor Nikiforov catapults himself straight into Yuuri’s lap, and Yuuri learns a few things.

Viktor trains. Viktor trains hard. Viktor has neglected everything but training and skating and satisfying his own frantic need to be the best for twenty years. Viktor Nikiforov is a lonely, sad bookworm with one friend and a gaping, yearning need to be touched–and he did not get to be where he is without making sacrifices. 

Yuuri has never met anyone who made more sacrifices for this sport and this art than Viktor Nikiforov. It opens something up inside of him, throbbing and raw. It makes Yuuri want to take Viktor’s heart and shove it inside his own chest so that it never feels cold or lonely again. It makes him want to stand on the top of a tall building somewhere and scream fuck you to every person he’s encountered whose jealousy tried to convince him that this man was less than what he is.

And yes, Yuuri knows now that Viktor is forgetful and brutally honest and often doesn’t say the right thing at the right time.

He knows that Viktor is only ambidextrous in that he can use a fork with both hands and that it takes him twenty minutes in the morning to decide on a shirt to wear. He knows that Viktor Nikiforov is a blanket hog and that if Yuuri wants to wake up still covered in the morning, they have to have no less than three blankets on the bed at all times.

He knows that Viktor sometimes descends into these loops of manic energy where he wants to do everything and can’t sit still and in those moments, Yuuri wants to lock him in a room and leave him there until he starts making sense again.

He also knows that Viktor Nikiforov has the most genuinely beautiful soul that Yuuri has ever had the opportunity to touch. He knows that very few people in his life will ever love him like Viktor, and that he himself has never felt for anyone quite what he feels for this man. His man. 

He knows these things and he thinks that maybe Viktor is perfect after all, perfect in his imperfection. Every jagged edge of his fits into one of Yuuri’s, and every curve of Yuuri’s lovingly presses flush with Viktor’s until they fit together seamlessly, like a pair of puzzle pieces.

Yuuri is also still a very petty person on the inside, though–which is why he makes posts on Instagram that read things like Viktor received his sixth well-deserved Russian National gold today! Congratulations to my amazing fiance.

And also:

So proud of my husband for all of his hard work commentating at the #Olympics. Some people go to school for half their lives and aren’t half as articulate as my Vitya. #Proudhubby

After that last one, Phichit leaves a voicemail on Yuuri’s phone that is literally just two whole minutes of him laughing hysterically and then wheezing, “THE SALT!” before hanging up.

“Yuuri, why did Phichit just sent me…sixteen crying laughing emojis and a text that says ‘your husband I can’t,’ in all caps?”

“Because a lot of people tried telling me you weren’t perfect and I’m proving them wrong,” Yuuri replies, not even looking up from his phone.

“Oh,” Viktor says, and literally crawls on top of him.

Yuuri supposes that the moral of the story is that the heart wants what the heart wants, and you have to find perfection in the imperfections–Viktor is loud and ditzy and forgets the English word for tomato on an almost daily basis, but he’s Yuuri’s husband. And because he’s Yuuri’s husband, he’s perfect.

Dinner at Malfoy Manor
  • Draco: Father, I have something to tell you...
  • Lucius: What is it
  • Draco: Well you see, Potter -
  • Lucius: *high-pitched shriek* NOT AGAIN
  • Lucius: One meal without talking about Potter, ONE, that's all I'm asking, Draco, how the hell did I raise you into this
  • Lucius: All you can ever talk about is Potter nothing but Potter seriously WHY
  • Lucius: Potter Potter Potter Potter Potter Potter
  • Lucius: Why don't you just fucking marry him
  • Draco:
  • Lucius:
  • Draco:
  • Draco: ... So we have your blessing?
  • Lucius: *goes and drinks the Malfoy wine cellar dry*

i talked to him on a wednesday. he sighed on my bed. i was skyping my sister, who was trying to teach me how to knit. i told him i needed to go to bed early, i had a test in the morning. he said he had things to discuss and i’m a patient person so i listened.

this is, i learn, how our “friendship” works. hours of my life become his sanctuary. he texts me constantly. his problems fill up every space in my planner. often he demands my attention rather than asking. i feel bad, because i’m the type to feel bad, so i listen. i offer advice that goes ignored, i sit in contemplative silence even though i should be studying, i nod my head and support him. 

he doesn’t notice i start drinking wine as soon as he shows up. a few times i make the mistake of trying to bring my own problems up. they are always overshadowed by his own, or else i am given an odd supply of uncomfortable comments. “i don’t feel good lately” is met with “a girl as pretty as you isn’t supposed to feel sad.” i say “i don’t like my writing recently” and he spends forty seconds saying i’m beautiful and intelligent and a perfect girlfriend before saying “unlike me, i’m awful” and before i know it, i’m comforting him again. we don’t have real conversations. once, as an experiment, i spend two hours completely silent, just to see if he’ll notice. he doesn’t. 

once he bursts into my room while i’m scheduling my week. he’s taken aback by how much i’m doing. “you look so busy!” he says, “where’s all the time you’re planning on spending with me?” he doesn’t ask about any of my other activities. he knows nothing about my life except that i’m good at listening. i feel myself under a rolling pin. he flattens me out to use me. he punishes me if i don’t give him attention - all i hear is how he is useless without me, how he’s barely holding on, how he doesn’t know what he’d do if one day i was gone. he doesn’t know my middle name. he misses my birthday.

it’s wednesday again. i’ve been drinking. he took some of my wine without asking. he lounges on my couch with his arm casually around me. my actual friends know i don’t like touching. i asked him to move but he just laughed and said “you’re so funny.” he’s too heavy for me to move physically so i just let him lay there, complaining. i stare into space, thinking about the news i got that day. about how my life has changed.

he looks up to me. “can i ask you a personal question?”  

i don’t say “that would be a first,” because my mother raised me to respond politely. i tell him go ahead, as always, i’m listening.

“why do girls like you date jerks?” he asks me.

i stare at him, uncomprehending. he is a runaway train, his mouth still moving. “I just mean,” he says, “you’re all always going after the worst guys like you don’t even see people like me. like i’m always being friend-zoned, even you did it, and you’re one of the only people who is nice to me. but girls like you never say yes to boys like me.”

i don’t know what he’s saying. i’m dating a girl, and he would know that, if he knew anything about me; a clever and talented girl who means everything to me. 

he sighs and sits back when i’m not immediate in responding. “this,” he says, “is what i mean.” looks up with puppy dog eyes at me, “i mean could you ever date someone as awful as me? am i just a friend? am i doomed to be nothing more than the friend to pretty girls?”

we aren’t friends. we aren’t friends. we aren’t friends. 

he moves the topic before i can reply, back to his problems. i text my girlfriend, “men are animals” and she sends me back a poem about how much she loves me. he tries to kiss me when he leaves, and when i duck out of it, i later get sixteen texts on how scared i am of sex. his facebook posts are all about how women don’t know how to find the right men. how we’re blind to the good things. how we don’t see fate when it’s happening. 

he says, “i wrote you something.”

it’s a poem about him.

  • Isak: Even kissed me.
  • Jonas: Ohmygodohmygod.
  • Magnus: Ok, all right. We want to hear everything. Jonas, get the wine. Isak, does this end well or do we need to get tissues?
  • Isak: Oh, it ended very well.
  • Jonas: *getting the wine* Do not start without me. Do not start without me.
  • Magnus: Ok, all right, let’s hear about the kiss. Was it like a soft brush against your lips? Or was it like a “I gotta have you now” kind of thing?
  • Isak: Well, at first it was really intense, you know. And then, oh god, and then we just sort of sunk into it.
  • Magnus: Ok, so, were you holding him? Or were his hands like on you?
  • Isak: No, actually first they started on my waist. And then, they slid up, and then, they were on my shoulders.
  • Magnus and Jonas: Ohhhhh.
  • [In the next room Even eating while Sana swirls a cup]
  • Even: And, uh, and then I kissed him.
  • Sana: Tongue?
  • Even: Yeah.
  • Sana: Cool.
  • Alec: Magnus kissed me.
  • Jace: Ohmygodohmygod
  • Isabelle: Ok, all right. We want to hear everything. Jace, get the wine. Alec, does this end well or do we need to get tissues?
  • Alec: Oh, it ended very well.
  • Jace: [getting the wine] Do not start without me. Do not start without me.
  • Isabelle: Ok, all right, let’s hear about the kiss. Was it like a soft brush against your lips? Or was it like a “I gotta have you now” kind of thing?
  • Alec: Well, at first it was really intense, you know. And then, oh god, and then we just sort of sunk into it.
  • Isabelle: Ok, so, were you holding him? Or were his hands like on you?
  • Alec: No, actually first they started on my waist. And then, they slid up, and then, they were on my shoulders.
  • Isabelle and Jace: Ohhhhh.
  • In the next room [Magnus eating while Raphael swirls a goblet]
  • Magnus: And, uh, and then I kissed him.
  • Raphael: Tongue?
  • Magnus: Yeah.
  • Raphael: Cool.
  • Castiel: Dean kissed me.
  • Gabriel: Ohmygodohmygod.
  • Charlie: Ok, all right. We want to hear everything. Gabriel, get the wine. Cas, does this end well or do we need to get tissues?
  • Castiel: Oh, it ended very well.
  • Gabriel: *getting the wine* Do not start without me. Do not start without me.
  • Charlie: Ok, all right, let’s hear about the kiss. Was it like a soft brush against your lips? Or was it like a “I gotta have you now” kind of thing?
  • Castiel: Well, at first it was really intense, you know. And then, oh god, and then we just sort of sunk into it.
  • Charlie: Ok, so, were you holding him? Or were his hands like on you?
  • Castiel: No, actually first they started on my waist. And then, they slid up, and then, they were on my shoulders.
  • Charlie and Gabriel: Ohhhhh.
  • [In the next room Dean eating while Sam swirls a cup]
  • Dean: And, uh, and then I kissed him.
  • Sam: Tongue?
  • Dean: Yeah.
  • Sam: Cool.
4

They insisted she dress herself in girl’s things, brown woolen stockings and a light linen shift, and over that a light green gown with acorns embroidered all over the bodice in brown thread, and more acorns bordering the hem.

Supper was being served in the hall by the time Arya was all washed and combed and dressed. Gendry took one look and laughed so hard that wine came out his nose, until Harwin gave him a thwack alongside his ear.

anonymous asked:

I know we're all dead but can we talk about how cute it was that he said thank you when she took her top off? And how intimate that moment was when he just took a second to look at her, to breathe her in, to confirm that this was really happening? Cause of death: Olicity.

Oliver was the perfect gentleman throughout that entire scene. 

Starting from the beginning, he was… everything. He was a man who was clearly still in love with this woman, but he’d also heard her last season when she said she was, for all intents and purposes, done. He was a man who was willing to get every tiny scrap of her natural sunlight, no matter what the cost for himself. Y’all are lying to yourselves if Felicity wasn’t doing exactly what Curtis suggested when the idea of her trying the salmon ladder came about. She’s all cute and flirty and doing something that shows a lot of skin, and yet, the entire time, Oliver was just so sweet. He didn’t push it, he didn’t take what are pretty obvious signs, he didn’t do anything without her explicit permission and direction. They went through two bottles of wine, my friends, they were quite a few sheets to the wind and still, he was the perfect gentleman. Even when she asked him to help her down, when he grabbed her waist, when he held her close, letting her down gently, cradling her like she’s the most important thing in his entire world (she is)…

(src)

He was just… 

(src)

… so Oliver and so respectful and I loved it so much.

But then it gets better.

Felicity finally makes the first move, she kisses him and remember the way he responded? 

(src)

(wow they kiss really well like damn well done a+)

He gives it his all because that’s all he wants to give her. He messed up so much in the past, and while the source of those issues are deeply buried and require a fucking bulldozer to unearth, it doesn’t change that it effectively ruined the best thing in his life. But now, now he has her back and it’s everything. Yes, the wine has stripped their inhibitions, but it just scratched off the surface, revealing what they’ve always, always wanted.

(src)

(src)

(This was cute af, anon, I so agree. He’s so totally getting swept up in the sensation of having her in his arms again, of kissing her, tasting her, feeling her, and it’s intoxicating. It takes over everything, leaving no room for anything but continuing to feel those wonderful things. We see that in the way he suddenly spins her, with so much intent, so much purpose - I know I’m not the only one who thought that was going somewhere else - but then he’s so painfully gentle with her. He could absolutely rip her sweater to pieces if he wanted to and he knew she probably wouldn’t complain one bit until later, but he didn’t, because remember, this is the Oliver who has been in love with this woman forever and he lost her and he’s been respecting her wishes in not pursuing a relationship and suddenly she’s here and she’s with him, but that doesn’t change where they are mentally, where he’s at mentally. (Wow, tangent.) It’s marked with that soft, adorable smile of his - that happy smile of his - and the way he says, “Thank you.” It’s really as if he’s thanking her for giving them this chance again.)

And then…

(src)

The passion is back, brimming over, all-consuming, burning them from the insides out, taking over everything, pulling them together like the magnets that they are…

But that’s not all it’s about, not quite. It’s about that, oh yes, but it’s also about connecting again, not just physically but emotionally and mentally, with their very souls. This isn’t just physical for Oliver, nor is it for Felicity, which is what he needs to double check, he needs to see, to make sure that… 

Well, that this is happening, that it’s what he thinks it is, that she’s on the same page, that she wants this, that she wants it as badly as he does, that she’s doing it for the same reasons, that… 

(src)

(the way he whispers her name, a gasp, a breathless plea… a prayer…)

He has to make sure. He has to. One, because it’s Oliver and when it comes to Felicity, there’s never been a halfway. 

Which is so very interesting considering what happened tonight - thinking about it from Oliver’s perspective, he honestly thought he was giving Felicity everything he could. He didn’t know at the time that he was only giving half of himself, only giving her the pieces he felt worthy of her, not realizing that he was hiding things from her, all under the guise of trying to protect her, in his own warped way. He has been broken, in his mind, for so long, but it’s only when he’s whole within himself that he can finally be with her, which we’re finally seeing, thank goodness.

He’s all in or he’s all out and he needs to know that Felicity is there with him.

(src)

But not a simple “Are you sure this is what you want,” no, it’s more than that.

(src)

It’s about them, and their love for each other.

(src)

And there it is. She’s right there with him, her love for him shining through, bathing him in its purity, a cleansing feeling that shines light in the darkest corners of his being (even if he doesn’t recognize it until much much much later). 

Cause of death: Olicity 

Indeed, anon. Indeed.

The types and what I think of them based on what I've seen from my friends(and probably a little insulting)

~as an INTJ

INTP
- quiet
- can make a bitch face that makes you cry
- probably thinks u stupid
- says that MBTI is shit
- fashionista
- has an ENFP friend(“ENFP no!”)
- savage
- that friend who has ultra weird ideas when drunk
- probably most adorable smile on earth
- smart
- most of the time just rising eyebrows and blinking

ENTJ
- bossy af
- prima ballerina
- she is beauty she is grace
- she will punch you in da face
- always in warm socks
- also an actress
- knows how to build things
- basically good at everything
- will shout at you if you do something wrong
- probably slept with almost all male friends

ENTP
- a n n o y i n g AF
- never shuts up
- meme queen
- so loud
- not funny jokes
- make up queen
- at least smart
- thinks she’s better than you(and maybe she is)
- if you take a sip from her mug u die
- has an ENFP slave
- kinda selfish
- another fashionista
- if she laughs the whole room laughs with her
- soooo much self confidence wow

INFP
- THAT SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE
- garbage lord
- writer buddy
- has ton of OC’s AND GAY SHIPS
- cannot into decisions
- junky food
- understands(really)
- don’t like loud people
- constant lala land
- savage without even noticing
- 4w5
- has 8 minute long video of herself eating french fries on her phone
- impressive self control
- cute laugh
- cute
- the best person to rant with

ENFP
- can’t stay in one place for a minute
- suddenly disappears in a middle of a party
- daydreaming a lot
- cheerful
- likes to drink A LOT
- too many friends
- nice for everyone ugh
- that laugh which sounds like a puppy riding a pink bicycle in a tuxedo
- can bring ENTP back to earth

ENFJ
- mom friend
- has too many friends HOW IS IT EVEN POSSIBLE
- gonna steal your friends without even noticing
- likes fancy drinks and kitschy things
- obsessed with doggos
- sudden outbursts of anger
- hypochondriac
- really anxious when driving
- doesn’t understand a concept of a personal space

ISTJ
- another bitch face
- can rise one eyebrow HOW U DO DIS?????
- doesn’t understand memes
- smart
- lack of self confidence
- secretly hates u
- wears comfy clothes but looks so good
- has a lot of savings but hardly ever uses them
- they knows better ok? don’t even try to tell them that they are wrong
- don’t particularly like pets
- perfect teeth
- so so so smart once again
- sometimes are rather calm but sometimes… don’t ask

ESTJ
- that kid who asks too many questions during your presentation
- constant bitch face
- hot
- stingy
- falls asleep during parties
- a rant person
- bossy
- hard working
- teachers like her

ESFJ
- will help you EVEN WHEN YOU HAVENT ASKED FOR HELP
- has a lot of friends
- drinks a lot
- hard-working
- daddy’s little princess/mama’s boy
- assertive
- smoking a lot
- tells everyone what to do

ISTP
- white Kanye West
- would kill u if u did something with his shoes
- likes weird electronic genres of music I can’t even name
- on 9gag all the time
- knows all memes
- League of Legends pro player
- can make funny faces
- looks like he was angry
- black humor(especially likes jokes about Jews)
- awkward silence gains a whole new meaning

ESFP
- the whitest person I know
- “what do u meat it was sexist?? it was funny!!!!”
- only wears yellow pants
- likes PE teacher probably a little too much
- can’t find a girlfriend
- will massage your feet if u don’t watch them properly
- has stupid ideas
- likes basically every person
- drinks wine at parties even though he says that true man should drink only vodka
- don’t know when someone is mean to him

ESTP
- loud
- hey lets go to the another city and get drunk!!! because why not
- class clown
- talks about her life too much like seriously
- and also about various secretions of her body
- probably gonna end up in jail
- smart and stupid at the same time
- lazy
- has problems with concentration
- talkative
- has problems with self-esteem which she covers acting out like a douche

Don’t take this personally lol
jon snow: my territory

ANON REQUESTED: Can you do some Jon snow smut please ;) 

note: uhmmm, its smut. kinda a lil bit but smut  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


You crashed into Jon’s chambers with two flagons of wine and ale with two cups. Jon was busy looking at his map, with a deep look on his face. He was surprised that he saw you, late at night and you just barged in.

“What are you doing?” He asked as he took a seat, watching you move.

“What am I doing?” You raised the cups and you exclaimed. “Drinking, we’re drinking.” He started to protest but you shut him out, “I know you are King in the North now, but you’re always so serious these past days.”

He grabbed the cup from your hand and he poured himself the sweet wine, filling it almost to the brim. He chugged it all down with one gulp, and he flushed red already from the alcohol. You took a drink as well, and you looked at his table.

“What are you doing?” You asked as you drank the wine. You sat on the table, moving the markers away. 

“Maps,” both of you said it at the same time, and he laughed as he grabbed the wine for more.

It has been a while since you spent time with him, since he was always so busy talking about strategies, and all of the problems that carried on his shoulders. You stared at him, slowly drinking his cup. You remembered that this was once the man you loved, but your feelings subsided when he took you just for a friend. A close friend, you remembered as he hugged you one time.

“What’s the matter?” He asked as he saw you staring.

You didn’t look away, but you smiled. “Nothing,” you glanced at the flagon, “We’re out of wine.”

He raised the other flagon, and he filled your cup. “We still have ale.”

You laughed as he raised the flagon to fill his cup as well. He was getting so flustered and intoxicated, he started to mumble inchorent words. He smiled and he laughed, out of nowhere. “Do you remember when you ran,” he laughed loudly, “And you fell into this pit of mud!”

“That wasn’t funny!” You said as you remembered that moment. Everybody in the Black were laughing as you drenched in the mud. You laughed, when you remembered another thing, “I pulled you in.”

He nodded as he finished the remaining flagon. “We both smelt of shit for the whole week,” he laughed as he stared at you on his table.

You finished your drink as he did with his, and silence filled the whole room. He stood, and he stayed in front of you as you held your cup in your hands. You smiled at him, and he moved closer. He set your cup on the table, and he inched closer, and your feet dangled off the table as he moved.

Keep reading

What everyone in the ranging was thinking

Jon: Here I go, off to impress Dany- uh, I mean, save the realm. Yeah that… Shut up.

Beric: We’re all here and we’re all together and I think that’s pretty great.

Jorah: *broods because the north reminds him of his father*

Gendry: *complains*

Thoros: Let’s all have some wine.

Tormund: I like dick.

Sandor: Fuck all of you fucking fuckers. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Especially fuck you.

Sugar Daddy date ideas

Obviously to start out with you have coffee, drinks at a nice/fancy bar, lunch/dinner.
Once you start to get closer and more intimate, dates I have had or am planning for the future are:

- wine tasting at a vineyard, or tasting scotch at a distillery, or beer in a brewery

- for bars, take him to a secret speakeasy he doesn’t know about, or suggest he gets a room at a luxury hotel with drinks in the bar beforehand 😉

- couple’s spa/ massages, champagne and plenty of private time

-if your SD likes clubbing, invite your hot girlfriends (make sure you can trust them not to steal him away) and have him get a table at an exclusive club.

-have him take you to Vegas to gamble! He should give you some money to play with, and maybe you can win some more to take home

- shopping at boutiques/department stores (pick things out for him too! Make sure it’s not just all about you. Choose things you think look good on him and tell him he looks sexy, that way he’s less likely to feel like you’re using him.. though of course you are)
Also, you can ask him to pick out clothes that he thinks look good on you (or lingerie 😉) that way, you can play it off as him buying you new clothes for his own enjoyment! Tell him “I can’t wait to wear this for you..”

- if you’re not shy, take him to a sex toy shop.

- have him take you to a concert or play in the VIP section.. maybe you want to see Jay Z, Beyoncé or Kanye on tour? Or maybe he enjoys Broadway?

- for the more refined SD maybe ballet or the opera.. if anything it’s a nice excuse to get dressed up in black tie and look stunning. If you don’t know anything about it read up on whichever show you’re going to and the careers of the performers, and make it sound like you know what you’re talking about!

- for the sporty SB’s go skiing, play tennis or even better, golfing. If you know how to golf that is a huge plus in the SD world because it’s a sport that many businessmen enjoy and use to close deals! Use going golfing with him to close your deal 😉

- if you don’t want to play a sport then you can at least go to a game with him! What’s his favorite sport? Football, soccer, baseball, basketball? Maybe he can get court side seats! And again, read up on the sport so you’re not constantly asking him to explain what’s going on. Nothing is more annoying. You don’t have to go overboard and pretend you’re a huge fan, as that’s annoying too if you’re faking it, but at least have a general idea of how things work.

- upper class sporting events include polo (veuve clicquot polo classic for example), Wimbledon or the US Open, or the Masters golf tournament. These tickets are generally more expensive, and you should dress nicer.

- cooking classes! Learn how to cook each other’s favorite meals

- gallery openings and museum exhibitions, or charity galas. This depends on whether your SD wants to introduce you to his friends and society (assuming he is part of society). Even if he isn’t, you can buy tickets to major art events such as Art Basel in Miami. Or attend an art auction by major auctions houses such as Christie’s or Sotheby’s

- Getaway for the weekend to the beach! Remember, if he’s kind enough to book tickets and arrange everything, it’s your job to make the weekend as stress free and relaxing for him as possible. And long walks on the beach, while cliched, are still very romantic! And take care of him while you’re there - for example make sure his drink is always full (you order with the waiter so he doesn’t have to) and put sunscreen on him, throwing in a little massage.

- My SD took me in a helicopter to the Hamptons. Got to see this incredible view of New York as we were flying out (and on the way back as well)! Or for the more adventurous pairs.. sky diving?

- have him rent a yacht for just the two of you for the day/weekend (or if he owns a yacht, even better)!

- for the traveling SD, have him take you along on his business trips. London seems to be a common destination for these types, as does NYC, LA, and Hong Kong.

- take a short weekend road trip if you can’t travel for longer. For example, go to Nantucket from Boston for the weekend, or drive to Napa if you live in California

- stay up all night kissing and talking until the sunrise is a sure fire way to make him fall in love with you and have him wrapped around your little finger

- more couple vacation ideas include going glamping on safari in Africa (not like camping at all - it’s like a five star hotel with air conditioning etc that just happens to be in a tent rather than a building), going salsa dancing in South America, scuba diving in the Maldives or Fiji, or shopping in the souks in Marrakech!

- you can always surprise him by showing up at his door with movies, a bottle of wine, and wearing a coat with nothing underneath!

You can really make memories to last a lifetime with your SD footing the bill, and it’s a win win for all as he gets to go on dates/vacations with a pretty young thing and make memories as well!

And remember, it’s his experience as well, especially since he’s paying for it. You should be low maintenance and non fussy - to an extent. Obviously your plane tickets should be first or business class, but don’t kick up a fuss if he takes you to Italian instead of Sushi, for example. ALWAYS, ALWAYS BE GRACIOUS AND GRATEFUL!!! if he wanted someone nagging him and being bitter/bitchy/passive aggressive about stupid details, he’d get a girlfriend or a wife!

Any other suggestions?

“I want to talk to you about something,” Even says and Isak’s stomach literally falls out of his ass. Thing is, there’s a reason for this. Because the last time Even had used that specific phrase, he had just been accepted into a film school. In London. And Isak had just been accepted into a biomedical research position in Oslo. Of course, it all worked out in the end because they are Isak and Even and they’re like, fated, or some shit that Even always says in the nighttime hours, but damn was that a rough couple of months.

So like, the phrase causes a brief flash of panic.

Isak glances at the table– which probably should have been his first clue that something was up. Even had made all of his favorite foods for dinner. And he knew he spotted strawberry shortcake in the kitchen, so Even had gone for the big guns in buttering Isak up.

He swallows the bite of chicken and takes a swig of red wine (because he is now one classy motherfucker.) “Okay?”

Even taps his fingers on the table and then reaches up to take his own sip of wine, but puts it back down just as quickly. “Okay. Okay here we go.”

But Even says nothing right after that, so Isak has all the time in the world to fucking lose his mind.

“Even,” Isak hedges, “Baby. You’re freaking me out. Like a lot.”

“I know.” Even shakes himself, “I’m sorry. I don’t know how you’re going to take it and this is like- a life changing conversation so I’m trying to be articulate and get it right on the first try.”

Isak runs a hand through his hair, “Well, are you divorcing me?” 

Even shoots him the most deadpan look in the world, so Isak lets a little smile tug on the corner of his lips, “Okay good. You’re not pregnant, are you?”

Even freezes and opens his mouth and Isak raises his eyebrows, “That was a joke. Even, if you’re pregnant I need to have a serious discussion with someone about the laws of biology.”

Even throws a wadded up napkin, “I’m not fucking pregnant, you shit.” He plays with the collar of his white cuffed shit (Another! fucking! red! flag! because when the hell have they ever dressed up for each other?), “But like- it has to do with that.”

“Just come out and say it,” Please god, say it before Isak has an aneurysm, “Whatever it is, do it.”

So he does.

Even takes a deep breath and says, “I want to talk about adopting a kid.”

Isak blinks.

There is a bit of ringing in his ears, so he doesn’t quite hear the way Even scoots his chair back and slides to his knees right in front of Isak’s chair, “Baby?”

Me baby?” Isak says dumbly, “You want a baby. Like a real baby.”

“Yeah,” Even’s voice is level, controlled. “Yeah, I really do, Isak. And it doesn’t have to be now. But I want to talk about it with you.”

“With me,” he repeats dumbly, “You want a kid with me? Why? Oh my god, Even, I’m a mess. I’ve been going commando for the past week because I ran out of boxers and I’m too lazy to do laundry!”

That damn grin at the corner of Even’s mouth nearly does him in. The quick kiss Even presses to his lips does, “You are the only person I would ever want a kid with.”

Isak grabs his wine glass and chugs it, “A kid. Like you and me adopting a kid and taking care of it and raising it until it’s 18. Changing diapers and… going to school performances and… rocking it when it gets sick.”

Even nods softly, “And taking family vacations to the beach…. teaching him or her all about movies… and you can teach them about parallel universes and other science stuff.”

“Holy shit, Even…. you want a kid. With me.”

“I do.”

Isak thinks about it, like a home movie where the actors haven’t quite all been chosen. He sees himself and Even, and a little human with flashes of blonde hair and hears baby giggles and-

He sees Even folded into a tiny little bed with a children’s book on his lap and a nameless, faceless, child (their child) in his lap. And Even is grinning and reading to them in funny voices. Then he sees himself behind a kid, directing them on how to look in a telescope.

He sees so much.

“This is a big thing,” Isak says, “A really, really big thing. Are you sure you want to?”

“The only thing I have ever been sure of in my life is you, Isak. I want to do this with you.”

“Okay,” Isak breathes, “Fuck. Let’s adopt a kid.”

The aftermath of the War

When Molly asks him, voice thick with worry, if he’s sure about splitting with Ginny. He tells her he isn’t, but he doesn’t know what he’s feeling. Because it’s easier to ease her concerns with a handful of crafted lies, than to tell her sometimes he can’t look at Ginny without thinking about the Forest of Dean and sleepless nights.

When Ron asks him, eyebrows furrowed in confusion, if he’s sure about quitting Auror training, he replies with a short “maybe one day I’ll go back,” because it softens the lines of Ron’s face and Harry sees his shoulders relax. Because it’s easier than admitting he’s tired of fighting and a Saviour can only do his duty so many times before he cracks.

When Luna asks him if he’s sure about traveling on his own, he assures her he’ll be fine and tells her she ought to keep her job. Because it’s easier than telling her he needs to be alone and figure out who he’s been all along. Who he is other than the Chosen One, the Wonder Boy and the Boy Who Feels Like He’s Already Lived Too Long.

When Hermione asks him if he’s sure he’s happy with his life, he stares at the flickering fire and gives her a small smile. Because it’s easier than telling her happiness seems far too distant of a goal sometimes.

When Headmistress Mcgonagall asks him if he’s sure about taking the job, he grins and tells her he doesn’t mind teaching until his head throbs. Because it’s easier than explaining that Hogwarts was his first home and he realized while in India that the ancient halls that hum with magic are the place where he belongs.

When he goes to the Burrow on a snowy Christmas Eve, holding Draco by the hand, almost scared that he’ll leave. He looks at them and hopes, he wonders if they’ll ask. He itches to tell them, how they flew on Friday nights and how their Saturday mornings were filled tea and a little bit of wine. How his chest felt a size to tight, when he looked Draco in the eye and he saw the colour of the Winter’s sky. How they kissed under the stars, when the castle was asleep and the forest was alive.

Instead, they don’t ask, but give him a knowing smile, and Harry knows, that for once, they know he’s sure about it all.

Not all is well, they’ll always have their scars. They’ll always be children who fought too many wars. But Hermione looks at him, how his face is lit with giddiness. And at last, she doesn’t worry about his happiness.

A special day

“I can’t believe you went for the chocolate cake.”

“Why? It’s so good!”

Draco shakes his head as he smiles at Harry fondly.

“We just had a three course meal. I honestly don’t understand how your stomach isn’t bursting. Mine is about to.”

Harry grins at him, the fork still in his mouth. He pulls it out deliberately slow and gives it an extra lick. His eyes sparkle in the candlelight and Draco can’t help but think how lucky he is and that Harry has never looked more handsome.

“Do I have any chocolate on my face?” Harry asks, wiping his chin inelegantly with his napkin. Draco snorts. Sometimes Harry just has impeccable timing.

“Oh Merlin, come here,” Draco mutters, still unable to wipe that smile off his face. He leans over the table and brushes Harry’s jaw with his fingertips. Harry lets out a little sigh when Draco presses their lips together. He briefly sucks on Harry’s bottom lip and feels him shake with laughter as he releases it.

“All chocolate gone?” Harry chuckles.

“All gone,” Draco grins. He leans back in his seat and watches Harry as he gulps down his wine.

“Sometimes I wonder,” Draco mutters in mock distaste.

“What, why you love me?” Harry immediately says, smacking his lips. Draco hides his face behind his hands and starts laughing; the way only Harry can make him. He asked himself that question a lot in the past, why he fell in love with The Boy Who Lived of all people. But the answer is simple.

Because he’s Harry.

“Come on, you have to try it.”

Draco lowers his hands and meets Harry’s gaze.

“The cake,” Harry says excitedly.

When he lifts his fork and holds it out to Draco, Draco’s eyes fall on the ring on Harry’s finger. His lips curl upwards and he finally leans forward and opens his mouth wide. The cake is indeed delicious. It’s velvety and melts pleasantly on his tongue.

As Harry takes another bite, Draco rests his chin on his hand and just gazes at his husband. When they agreed to go to this restaurant tonight, neither of them mentioned what day it is. They didn’t need to. They both know. And yet, neither of them says it out loud. They didn’t toast and they didn’t exchange gifts. They are each other’s gift. As corny as that sounds, Draco thinks and momentarily scrunches his nose.

“You’ll get wrinkles if you keep doing that,” Harry remarks.

“And you’ll get a divorce if you keep talking with your mouth full.”

Harry chokes on the cake in his mouth, obviously trying no to burst out laughing.

“Wait until tomorrow at least,” he snickers. Draco’s answering smile is wide and warm.

He appreciates the way they both acknowledge this day, without really talking about it. They didn’t plan it. They don’t seem to need any words to know that this is perfect as it is.

Maybe Harry would have made a big thing out of it if he didn’t know Draco so well. But he does. And Draco knows Harry doesn’t want a big, over the top gesture either. Maybe as a joke. But this is far too important and precious to make fun of. Maybe in twenty years. But not today. Today, Draco just wants to enjoy this moment. Their first anniversary of many to come.


HAPPY BIRTHDAY @fleetofshippyships!!! 💖💖💖 You are awesome and I love you and I’m sorry for the mentioning of tongues! 😂 (It’s just one tongue, though, so I hope it isn’t that bad 😂)

2 | Jealous

A NIGHT AT HOME | JUNGKOOK VERSION 

WORD COUNT: 5,378

warnings: graphic smut, dirty talk, spanking, oral sex, fingering, rough sex, asphyxiation (choking), ass play, degrading names, dom!jungkook + sub!reader

Originally posted by junghope

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Things that Yuri Plisetsky does on his birthday
  • wakes up later than usually and goes to the kitchen to angrily remind Yakov and Lila that he’s not doing anything today because it’s his birthday (not like he mentioned it about 500 times this week)
  • his 16th birthday so he’s practically an adult now and they can kiss his ass (maybe he says that in other words. or not)
  • reads a super nice text from Yuuko, a short message from Otabek with “so you have birthday today or not” and asking if they may talk later and then some really weird and creepy yet amusing posts on Yurio’s Angels forum
  • eats a big and against athlete’s diet breakfast that said Yakov and Lila prepared for him totally not because it’s his birthday or anything
  • gives a new toy to his cat since he doesn’t know when the cat’s birthday is anyway so they may celebrate together
  • shuts the front door in Victor’s and Yuuri faces after they start to sing him “happy birthday” in Russian
  • dies from embarrassment
  • lets them in only because they seem to carry a lot of birthdays presents with them
  • complains about every single one but when Victor offers to return them to store almost breaks his arm
  • goes to rink because Worlds still are coming and he needs to wipe these idiots out there
  • is lifted by Mila 16 times because of some weird tradition she heard of
  • swears to kill anyone who publishes a video of that on Instagram
  • skates a bit for fun
  • gets super excited seeing his grandpa watching him from the side
  • (it was a surprise that he’ll come to St Petersburg, Yakov paid for tickets)
  • eats katsudon pirozhki with his grandpa
  • shares some with anyone on rink too and they show him the super big cake they bought for him
  • eats a lot of cake telling them all how disgusting they are
  • shows his favourite places in St Petersburg to his grandpa and drinks some hot wine from him (he hates its taste but he’s almost an adult ok)
  • makes grandpa stay with him one more week
  • comes back home only to call Otabek immediately
  • tells his best friend how he’s birthday’s weren’t so bad even with all those self-absorbed morons around
  • gets excited when Otabek says he has something for him too
  • though he plays it cool
  • but then dies again realising this is a link to an actual playlist made only for him with songs produced by DJ Altin™ 
  • goes to sleep after listening to it about 17 times and calling Otabek to say it pretty decent
  • “best birthday of my life” he mutters to his cat before falling asleep