all the shit you say

anonymous asked:

Okay but I hope the anti's are angry after all the shit they say about us otayuri shippers like???? Excuse you? Don't tell me to kill myself over fictional characters???

YES THIS LMAO I LOVE SEEING THE ANTIS ANGRY LIKE LMAO WHAT YALL GONNA D O

anonymous asked:

When I see the sadness in her eyes I can feel my heart cry, and when she continues to blame herself it reveals the dawn of her unspoken suffering. I didn’t know how to love her. I felt uneasy as the butterflies slowly started to creep upwards reaching my throat and turn into glass. It was as though my attempt to express how I felt would only deepen her scars, and cut her beneath the damage that has already been done.

her name was majnoona,
at least that’s what everyone knew her as,
rumour had it that she went insane after her lover sought to marry another,
who could blame her for losing her mind when he spent many moons promising her a future,
and a house facing east so that they could watch the sunrise together every morning,
and a daughter with his smile because even on her dark days, only his smile could comfort her,
his tongue dripped with honey-coated words from dusk to dawn,
and her diet only consisted of his honey, always trying to look beautiful for him, always trying to make him happy, his happiness was her happiness,
but without a gun held to him, he packed her sanity and her happiness in his bags and was gone by fajr,
leaving nothing but a letter about how he did not know how to love her any longer,
she was a living reminder that the Y chromosome is directly linked to cruelty and false promises,
how else could we explain why men treat the women who love them with such hostility?
everywhere she went she left a trail of tears and the scent of a broken heart,
a scent that warned all the other girls to seek more than just a man’s love,
for men wake up one day
and suddenly..they do not know how to love you,
for men do not know how to love at all.

The longer I participate in fandom the less I like white people. Y'all always have some shit to say but you never wanna shut the fuck up and listen™ when someone calls you out for problematic thinking.
Y'all will even walk right into a post calling out racist tendencies in fandom to BE RACIST, and you always think you’re being so clever too. It’d be hilarious if I was 12 and not black but can y'all like… stfu mayhaps? Especially the white Toby Starch stans.

Shit Slytherins Say: #100
  • Slytherin: "Why did the chicken cross the road?"
  • Gryffindor: "Seriously?"
  • Slytherin: "To Get to the ugly witches house."
  • Gryffindor: "I don't get it."
  • Slytherin: "Knock knock."
  • Gryffindor: "Who's there?"
  • Slytherin: "The chicken"

Context: were being attacked by two hydra, and my dragonborn bard named Fiddle, plays kazoo

DM: And it’s now Fiddle’s turn.

Me: well… Exactly how hard would it be to seduce a Hydra?

DM: …. What

Me: I’m gonna play it a love song on Kazoo, and seduce it.

DM: …. Fuck, roll I guess

Me: *rolls a 19 plus my proficiency in performance and my charisma modifier* 26.

DM: I guess you-

Me: wait. *Pulls a kazoo from my bag and starts playing Rick Astleys Never Gonna Give You Up*

DM: okay- yeah- you seduce the Hydra with relative ease.

Smooth Talker

Last week, I was DMing a one-off campaign for a few friends. Two have played before and the third has never played a live role-playing game before, so he was a bit uncomfortable. He decided to be a bard (named Shilo Buff).

I started them off in a stereotypical tavern for everyone to get their bearings and put the ball in the bard’s court, letting him do whatever he wanted.

Bard OOC: I walk up to the bar and lean on it next to a lady standing there and I say…

Bard: Hey, baby, you ever heard a song before?

The Lady (Me): Ummm…yes?

Bard: You wanna hear another?

Bard OOC: And I play this on my bagpipes…

He pulls out his phone and a bagpipes cover of Careless Whisper starts to play.

Me, the DM, through my laughter (everyone else is cracking up as well): Roll a performance check.

…he rolls a 20.

The entire bar is enraptured by his performance and they fill a cup in front of him with gold. The lady hangs on him the rest of the evening.

And that’s still only the second best pick-up line I’ve experienced in a Dungeons & Dragons tavern.

I know this is a lesbian blog but I do want to make a quick shout out to my bi sisters:
Being bi isn’t a phase and you deserve better than someone who tells you that.
Being bi isn’t a “gateway sexuality” to being straight or gay and you deserve better than someone who thinks that.
Being bi doesn’t make you “more likely to cheat” and you deserve better than anyone who believes that.
Being bi doesn’t give you any privilege (no matter the gender of your partner) and you deserve better than someone who claims that.
Being bi is a good thing and you deserve someone who embraces you the way you are 100% and loves and supports you ❤❤❤

  • Evan Hansen: Two friends, on a perfect 'day'
  • Me, and my tree bros heart: I KNOW YOU WANT TO SAY 'PERFECT DATE' EVAN
6

Bonus-

He’s the only one that got an invitation like that >:}

Look @angel-with-a-pipette I finally did the thing we talked about forever ago. Hope I did it justice >.<

Am I the only one that doesn’t care at all that Mon El said that he loved Kara before Sanvers have said it? Like the relationship between Kara and Mon El is messy and lacks development, so I’m not surprised that he said that he loved her so quickly. In all honesty he may not even truly love her, she’s just the first person he’s truly been attached to and not a hook up, which he was doing on Daxam. 

BUT Sanvers has been developed and I’m just waiting for that special moment that they actually say it. Not some type of “I’m saying this cause I don’t want to lose you bullshit,” but they say it cause it’s true. Cause they truly can’t live without one another and love each other, ride or die. When they do say it, it will be impactful and not easily forgotten like Mon El’s confession.

6

okay so this got out of hand but anyway

Ravenclaw Headcanon

When someone in the class asks if anyone has a spare quill, the ravenclaws are always the ones with five or six, but don’t give them out, because what if they don’t give them back?

anonymous asked:

you talked about jungkook's fixation with jimin's booty and jimin's mouth, so i think it's time we talk about his fixation with jimin's chest because i feel like that's a thing too

Oh, it’s definitely a thing, Anon..

Originally posted by yourpinkpill

Originally posted by chimchiminie13

Originally posted by satellite-jeon


..That slow drag of his hand down Jimin’s chest seems… practiced - habitual, even. And the best part is that Jimin seems completely and utterly unfazed by it.

The tale of the Bard and Goblin.

Bard: I want to try and seduce that Goblin.
DM:But why though? You’ve just slaughtered all its friends.
Bard: I don’t care, I want me a piece of that sweet Goblin tush.
DM:Fine, roll me a charisma check.

*Rolls Charisma*
*Rolls a critical fail*

DM: you have failed to Woo the heart of the goblin, but instead you have a strange feeling, it makes you shudder. It might be those long pointy ears or those tender Goblin hands. Oh how you crave to fall into those scrawny arms on cold winter nights. His eyes, they muddy browns make your heart flutter. You have Indeed been seduced by the Goblin.

And that’s the story of how Derek the Bard fell in love with his future partner Greasebag the Goblin.

Pop and Wedlock

Same Campaign as Mother of (No) Mercy.

As the group of seven, irl 5 kids (8-14) and their (40s) parents goes further into the jungle, they are ambushed by a tribe of Cliffwalk Shifters. Everyone but the Monk fails their diplomacy check, so while the tribe lets them stay in their camp that night, they weren’t too friendly towards the party.

Now I like to get the players invested in the world as much as I can, so that night, the Shifters engaged in a tribal dance around a fire with a cool thing happening at the end. I’d rolled for the 4 Shifters dancing and the best got a 19 on his performance check. With no bard in the party, I expected the characters to just watch and learn some culture.

I did not expect the Dragonborn Paladin to try to redeem himself on the dance floor.

Paladin OOC: I’m gonna try to dance as best I can to make these people like me.

Me, surprised: Uh, sure. Roll performance.

*Nat 20*

The table roars and I feel the blood drain from my face.

Me: Ok, so all of you watch as your Dragonborn friend, known for his enforcement of justice and valor, absolutely kill it on the dance floor.

Rogue: Woo, you go Tornader!

Me: The Shifters are awestruck by the performance. After a moment of talking, a young and beautiful Shifter run out of a tent and straight up to Tornader. Before any of you can react, she kisses him passionately.

Paladin OOC: What’s happening?

Me, as the Shifter chief: Well done, scaled one. For your incredible performance in our ceremonial dance, you have won the hand of my daughter, Nutmeg, and are now a part of our tribe. Though we do not know the final place of the Journey Yet to Come, I am pleased to say you shall walk it together as Husband and Wife. Congratulations, my son.

Let me tell you, the look of horror that plays out on a 10 year old’s face when he finds out he has a wife to come home to is priceless. They are still married to this day, as he doesn’t think it would look good if a Paladin went through a divorce.