all the shabbat feels


Shavua Tov!!!

My challah cover finally covering challah. Also my new Shabbat candlesticks from my future mother-in-law. The only kosher wine I could find at the last minute, including complimentary dust.

I am feel so good after my first Shabbat after my conversion!

I hope you all are feeling rested and ready to take on your coming week!

alright tiva fandom listen up

I know we’re all emotionally drained and heart broken and tired of reading all the hopeful theories and au’s but hear me out (*insert kisses)
maybe just MAYBE Gary didn’t completely screw us over. I know the main complaint is that ziva would never keep tali from tony but let’s think about it for a second:
in PPF ziva never makes tony chose between her or the job. she wants him to go on with his life (partly bc she feels like she has to do it alone) but also bc she knows he’d do anything for her. he went on a suicide mission in Somalia for petes sake when he thought she was dead and here he is in Israel searching for her for months and putting his life on hold. now if there’s one thing we know about ziva david it’s that she’s super hard on herself. she doesn’t think she deserves tony the same way she thinks she deserves to stay out in Israel and “make amends” for all she’s done.

SO, if just a month or so after tony leaves while she still believes all this and is already feeling bad for all she’s done she figures out she’s pregnant. well she’s not about to call Tony bc she knows the kind of man he is and she knows he’ll be on the first plane to Israel minus his badge and gun. and ziva knows how much the job means to Tony. plus she probably feels like calling him 2 months after he left her on the tarmac saying she’s pregnant would come across as her trying to trap him in
AND she thinks she deserves punishment for her actions so why would she deserve a happy family? plus she’s all hormonal from the baby. now, as time goes on her hormones decrease, hopefully she learns to love herself, and she realizes tali deserves a father if nothing else..but now it’s too late. now he’ll get mad cause she didn’t tell him in the first place. and then talia turns 1 and she wants Tony there but now it’s been a year and she didn’t tell him..and then 2 years..and she’s stuck between not telling him and time building up and the fact that time has already built up. so she keeps going

flash forward to family first, I think either ziva figured out Trent was after her or there was something bigger going on and more people were after her. because even if she’s been out of the field for 3 years we KNOW that our little ninja Mossad ncis freakin queen ziva david didn’t get taken by surprise. but she knew Trent wouldn’t stop (she was there for the little eye in the ice cube trick remember?) or she knew this other unknown threat wouldn’t stop and the only way was to fake a death. but she didn’t want to have tali on the run with her, you can’t exactly take good care of a baby while you’re sleeping in alleys. and there’s only one person she trusts: Tony. so she figures out how to get tali back to him (either she really does trust Oreli now or Orelis one of the ones after her) and either sends him a clue with that Paris picture or just knows Tony will find her (he always does. dang it now I’m gonna make myself cry) anyway she knows Tony will find her in Paris but here’s the thing: she still thinks he’s just gonna bring her tali and be on his way. she’s already sent his life for a whirl wind first in Somalia then when she disappeared in Israel and now letting him think she’s dead along with the bombshell of tali. so I’m sure our precious cupcake who deserves the world but thinks she doesn’t deserve a thing, completely believes Tony will hand off the child good riddance and be outta there.

so now my friends if you’ve stuck through all that, think about precious ziva david seeing the two loves of her life walking hand in hand up to her and learning that tony quit bc he was the only thing tali had and that was what he had always wanted. and sure he won’t be pleased as pie that ziva didn’t tell him but he’ll understand like he always does and cue the happy family of 3 walking in to the Paris sunset
*fade to black and white*

if you look at last nights episode without the background knowledge/assumption that Gary is an idiot and hates us there’s some clues:
1. Tony and senior say they have a feeling zivas not dead (WHAT HAS THIS SHOW TAUGHT US ABOUT YOUR GUT)
2. no body. no proof. really a very shady case with no concrete details surrounding her death which is not how ncis typically rolls..we knew all about Kate’s death and Jenny’s
3. “ziva LOVES Paris” not loved. loves. our boy knows something
4. Tony leaves to go to TelAviv to find answers.
sound suspicious? sounds suspicious to me

I don’t know, I walked away from that episode drenched in tears but I never really felt like she was dead. and they pulled in some awesome little details (Paris picture, flash backs, the necklace, heck even abba just reminded me of shiva and Shabbat Shalom) that just brought all the tiva feels back and had me in tears. I think Gary might just have known what he was doing this time.
so don’t fret my loves tiva is CANNON (only been 10 years) and off in Paris with the insanely adorable tali