all the feelings

“This scavenger - this girl - resisted you?”

“That’s all she is, yes. A scavenger from that inconsequential Jakku. Completely untrained, but strong with the Force. Stronger than she knows.”

“You have compassion for her.”

“No-never. Compassion? For an enemy of the Order?”

“Kylo Ren. It appears that a reminder is in order. So I will show you the dark side. Bring the girl to me”

So, there we have it - this conversation, or something very like it, was filmed. Adam Driver said these lines, and the footage is locked away in a vault somewhere, guarded round the clock by an SAS SWAT team.*

This is only my speculation, since this isn’t something we can ask Pablo, but I’d wager that this exchange was deleted and replaced with something much briefer because it would have simply been far too telling. It’s important to remember how emotive Driver’s performance is when you think of these lines. While ADF’s prose is typically flat and undescriptive, I can almost guarantee that Driver would have made Kylo’s true feelings - the extent of Kylo’s emotional distress in relation to Rey - painfully clear. And if they are indeed going to continue exploring Kylo’s ‘weakness’ for Rey in the sequels, they won’t have wanted to telegraph that this overtly - they must have felt that what they had left in was sufficient, hinting at Kylo’s compassion for Rey without overtly calling it out.

But they didn’t see fit to remove the exchange from the novelisation, which is also telling because the novelisation is considered part of the canon. So while they felt it would be too much to include in the film, the complete text as the vast majority of viewers are going to experience it, they allowed it in the novelisation, which is only intended for a niche readership. I have a feeling that this passage is going to be well worth revisiting after VIII comes out.

* Probably not, but that’s what I like to imagine.

One of my favourite things is finding a fanfic, and getting so invested in the characters. I feel so much for them, their anger, and sadness and fear, and it destroys me. I’ll cry, and laugh, and yell, and hide behind my hands. But I LOVE that feeling of finding an author who can make me feel like I’m right there with them . 

Bless you, you wonderful authors out there.

Just a friendly reminder that, at the end of Kingsman, Merlin:

  • Lost Lancelot, the first Kingsman to be killed in seventeen years;
  • Lost Harry, a friend as well as a colleague, to a coma for several months;
  • Got Harry back;
  • Only to watch Harry slaughter a churchful of civilians before watching Harry get shot in the head through Harry’s own eyes;
  • Was betrayed by the leader of the organization he’s devoted his life to, a man to whom he has directly reported for decades (and if Arthur’s rotten now, who’s to say he wasn’t earlier, and that Merlin hasn’t previously, unbeknownst to himself, assisted the very people he thought he was trying to bring down?)
  • Then got news of that leader’s death (and a plot that will kill millions of people if it isn’t stopped within a matter of hours) from the man who killed him, Eggsy,
  • Who is, along with Roxy, a green recruit with no missions whatsoever under his belt, and yet, along with Roxy, is the only team Merlin takes with him to stop the supervillain and save the world armed only with bravery and a half-assed plan they work up on the fly, because, despite Merlin’s seventeen years of being Quartermaster without letting another one of his men die, despite thousands upon thousands of hours spent perfecting gadgets so they can get out of tight scrapes, hundreds of late nights spent reviewing grainy video footage so he knows what to do better next time, countless early mornings spent talking a terrified, panicking agent through a mission that went FUBAR and multitasking seeing through their eyes and listening to their words and hacking them through security and searching for an exit route and talking, always talking back to them in the calm, deep voice and telling them everything is fine, he’ll find them a way out, they’ll get through this and he’ll bring him home-despite all that
  • The only people he brings with him to save the world are two kids so brand new at this they don’t even have their uniforms yet, who haven’t spent hours on the comms joking and making ridiculous double entendres at him (you do realize this is being recorded, Lancelot?), haven’t spent hours at the pub laughing with him (Absolute bollocks of a match, Percival; a red card for a tug on his kit!?!), haven’t spent long nights in the hospital being looked after by him and returning the favor when necessary (I’ll clear you for a mission, Harry, when I clear you for a mission and not one minute before-and if you take that sling off, I will personally-), who have never killed a man or woken up screaming after missions gone bad or sat beside him and gripped the back of his chair with white-knuckled grips when their best mate’s on a mission gone bad, who don’t even know his real name, because aside from them
  • When the end of the world comes, Merlin is utterly alone.
  • And yet he’s calm and collected, takes charge of both of them and gives them orders and encouragement and guidance when they need it, and when everything is over and he’s all alone in his plane and wondering if any of the men he’s worked with and watched over for so many years are still alive or if they, too, betrayed everything he thought they’d all believed in, he compliments Eggsy and Roxy on a job well done and makes sure they know he’s proud of them, because those are things they need to know.