all of my feels for anthony head

I feel like I have to say this because I have so many Eliza feels:  

We’ve all read the infamous Laurens letter, we all saw all the face-touching between Lin and Anthony on stage, we’ve all had our full of all the homoerotic tension between A.Ham and Laurens, and we’ve all had that small voice whispering ‘gaaaaayyy’ in our head.

But that’s the thing: Alexander Hamilton was not gay. He was, in all likelihood, bisexual: there’s a huge case for him having loved John Laurens, and it’s clear that he loved Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton, too, desperately. You can hear it in the letters he writes her, the worry he feels for her safety and health mixed with the longing from being so far away from her so often. He adored her, and every word he wrote to her is a testament to that fact. If he didn’t care about her, the attention and affection he lavishes on her in his written work makes absolutely no sense. Attempting to erase Ham’s feelings for Eliza in order to bolster the feelings he had for Laurens does all three of them a huge disservice AND erases Ham’s potential sexuality. Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton was so much more than a political move, and it drives me nuts to see her reduced to that. 

tl;dr: Best of Wives and Best of Women, guys. Not just a beard.

Lockwood and Co

Please accept this piece of garbage, 

Love Angie.

“I can’t live like this anymore.” Lockwood buried his head behind his hands, the all too daunting feeling of loosing weighing down on him like a hailstorm. It’s a crushing sensation, knowing that someone you love has betrayed you over and over again. To make this better, she doesn’t seem to hear a word he says. There’s the shuffling of feet scrapping against wood. He doesn’t want to open his eyes. He knows what he’ll see, so why make the pain worse? Yet he does it anyway, the harsh sunlight stabbing at his eyes the moment he opens them. He only see’s her back as she flees the room and some part of him is thankful for that. He didn’t want to see her face as she left him, otherwise he’d be begging for her to never leave. Again.

He raises his eyes at the wafting smell of fresh tea and the tinkering clatter of tea cups. She stands there, unapologetic for the pain she’s caused him and walks like her world hasn’t fallen apart before her. Then again, love never breaks evenly. A tea cup is placed before him. Wet stands of hair fall into her eyes when she tilts her head. He hates it when she does that. Suddenly the room feels too small. George limps into the room, dark bags beneath his eyes but he takes one look at Lockwood, “What happened to you? You look like a bloody Raw Bones.”

Lockwood musters his best glare but the pain is too much. It feels like a hand around his heart and lungs, every breath agony. Regardless of whats happening, George grabs a slice of cake from the tea tray as well as tea. He sighs, wiping furiously at his eyes to prevent the tears, “Lucy has betrayed us all.”

“Why can’t I ever enjoy cake anymore?!”

Lucy bangs her head against the table, “You lost fair and square, Lockwood.”

“YOU CHEATED!”

“Oh my god Lockwood, its just Go Fish!”