all my emotions rn

I need you to take a moment of silence and think about this: just how special it must’ve been to both Jimin and Jungkook for them to wait a decade until FESTA-a very meaningful event to both BTS and Armys-to drop the cover.

Lee Daehwi, a 16 years old boy who recived hate since the very first nayana perfomance for being “ugly”, who recived  hate for being “femnine” and “gay” since first episode, who went through incredible amount of hate for being ambitious about his dream to debut, who never cried in front of camera, who’s closest people in Korea were his friends, who, at his young age, can sing, dance, rap, compose and write lyrics, who never complained about a thing, who just went through all the hardships to his dream by working hard and not giving up.

I have so much respect for this kid, he deserves all the love and appreciation in this world. I’m proud of you, my son. 

*sobs quietly* 

imagine

the way alec stretches in the morning, feeling warm and rested and happy in their bed, feeling like everything around him is burning to the ground, everything except for this…

until he realizes that magnus isn’t in bed. again. and magnus might smile, looking perfect and content, but four mornings in a row is four too many for everything to be okay.

and when alec asks, magnus deflects. he teases and he grins like everything is normal, but alec knows, god, he knows, because he’s like that too. he hates talking about his problems, he hates revealing the worst, softest parts of himself, and it takes one to know one.

and a small part of him is hurt that magnus won’t tell him, a small part of him wants to shake magnus and say “please, just tell me the truth,” but instead…

he’ll wait. because he knows magnus will tell him when he’s ready. because behind that glamour is the truth waiting to spill out. and when that happens, alec will be there, arms open and eyes clear, to listen and hold onto magnus until he realizes that he can always tell alec anything. that alec will do anything to make him smile a true smile. that alec loves him.


and then imagine

the way magnus feels. to know that the first person who ever loved you is the first person you killed. to know that being innocent wasn’t enough, that loving her wasn’t enough, that his very existence drove her to death.

and then imagine letting that fester over centuries. to hear it confirmed by generations of shadowhunters who looked at him like he wasn’t worth their time, to hear “you’re not worth it” from so many people that he thought he loved. and it turns into this rotten, ugly thing that he hides deep inside, masking it in carefree smiles and sharp sarcasm until sometimes he forgets that it’s there.

and then it’s today, it’s a bright, sunny morning, and despite all his efforts it’s back. the memory that he’s not enough, that he killed her, he killed her, he killed her. and there’s a darling boy who snores in his sleep and loves to cuddle, who tells magnus he loves him, who is somehow more than any other person magnus has let into his bed, who is somehow able to see that something is wrong under the glamour that magnus hides behind.

but still, he lies. because it’s easier, because it used to be enough. and even though the truth is bubbling under his skin, even though he inexplicably wants to tell alexander, magnus is scared. he is old and wise and absolutely terrified that the man he loves will be another face in a line of many to push him away.

but we know that today, somehow, after so many years, it will become too much. and magnus will finally rip the scab away, he will be honest with himself and honest with alec.

because something about the man with hazel eyes and dark runes and secret smiles is worth it. it’s inexplicable, it’s overwhelming, but still. it’s worth it.

8

“If you were both dumped by the same woman on the same day, you should say I’m an evil witch… and just curse me out together. You should console each other…You’re friends, after all… How could you fight like this?”