all i want is a piece of pizza

The Signs as Things my Kids Say:

Aries- “If I can’t choke him, I don’t want to play.” 

Taurus- “If I was a noob, I’d be like ‘ah! I’m a noob!’”

Gemini- *jumping* “I’m trying to make the house fall.” 

Cancer- *batman voice* “Don’t touch me”

Sagittarius- “Can I skip school for fun again?” 

Scorpio- “The other guys think they are in the lead, but they aren’t. I won.” 

Pisces- *crying* “He looked at me mean!” 

Leo- “I’m putting on a show. There will be fireworks, you all have to come.” 

Libra- “Will you put my blanket on me?” 

Aquarius- “I’m going to eat 10,000 pieces of pizza.” 

Capricorn- “I wanna be in my room. You’re distracting me.” 

Virgo- “I do a lot of things I’m not supposed to when you’re all sleeping.” 

I want all y'all to look at me here.

I want all y'all to know that I had two tacos and three pieces of pizza for lunch today because I was extremely hungry.

Now, that is definitely not a healthy lunch, and I am certainly not recommending or condoning that type of meal, BUT I need my followers to see that food ≠ bad. Did I eat too much? Probably. Do I feel kinda bloated and yuck? Absolutely. And if anything, *that* is the reason I should have eaten less/better. Not because eating or food is evil, but because what I ate and how much of it I ate didn’t make me feel very good. And it isn’t going to be an excuse for me to eat crap for dinner, either, or a reason to starve myself to “make up for it.” I am gonna go home after work and fix myself a wholesome dinner with lots of vegetables and lean proteins.

Food is about nourishment. That is literally its entire purpose. Sometimes, less nourishing foods taste really good and make us want to eat lots of them. And sometimes that is OK. Just remember to, for the most part, keep track and take responsibility for what you are eating and make sure you’re getting all of the nourishment your body needs!

  • Zoro: Do you want to know how I actually hurt my wrists?
  • Sanji: Yes.
  • Zoro: I was hula-hooping. I attend a class for both fitness and for fun.
  • Sanji: Oh my God.
  • Zoro: I mastered all the moves. The Pizza Toss, the Tornado, the Scorpion, the Oopsie Doodle.
  • Sanji: Why are you telling me this?!
  • Zoro: Because no one will ever believe you.
  • Sanji: ... You sick son of a bitch.
  • //-A conversation I just had with myself while trying to focus on studying-//
  • Me 1 hour after eating a salad: Hey, I could really go for some orange chicken
  • Brain: You actual crazy person, you are not remotely hungry, why would you-
  • Brain: You don't need that, you will get a sugar-
  • Brain: Ah, no, how about–
  • Brain: ...
  • Me: ...
  • Narrator: This series explores a year in the life of 600-pound individuals trying to regain control of their lives.

I was just remembering how a few days ago I was with my best friend, lets call her Jay, she ate like 4 pieces of pizza in one sitting and when I reached for just a small bite of one she told me no and pulled it away. I just looked at her kinda confused and all she said was ‘you want to lose weight right? I’m helping you.’ and laughed, I never told her about wanting to lose weight and she kinda constantly implies that I’m fat. Anyway I just smiled and mumbled ‘you have no idea…’ she is my living reverse thinspo :D I know its mean and stuff but she’s never that nice to me anyway. And the next morning she had even more pizza and the house was so quiet all I could hear was her chewing it was so gross, I actually gagged a little and had to leave the room. So, thanks Jay for always making me lose my appetite it means a lot to me. ^.^

11-Q Tag!

Tagged by @kuroo187​. Thank you very much :D

Always post the rules. Answer the questions asked, then write eleven new ones. Tag eleven people to answer your questions as well as the person who tagged you. 

1. If you would have to take part in an illegal car race which fictional character would be your partner in the race and why? (Can be from a movie, book, anime, series, really anything)
I’m not really sure… maybe Luffy or Usopp…They did a pretty good job in the car race in One Piece Gold so XD

2. If you have to live from only one kind of food for the rest of your life, which one would that be?
Pizza or sweet potato I can’t decide both tastes amazing

3. A place you want to move to?
Somewhere in the UK or in the Netherlands or in Sweden (okay why are all of these questions so damn hard? XD)

4. If you could have any creature or animal as a pet what would that be?
A black unicorn cause black unicorns are fucking amazing

5. What is worse, not being able to see or not being able to hear?
Not being able to see

6. Do you like superheroes/antiheroes and if you do, who are you three favorite ones?
Yes my favourites are Iron Man, Wolverine and Thor

7. Assassin or Jedi?

8. If you would be the kid of a god from any mythology (greek, roman, germanic, etc) who’s kid would you be?
I always loved swimming so maybe Poseidon I don’t really know

9. Bulbasur, Charmander or Squirtle?
I choose you Charmander

10. If you had any superpower which one would that be?
Maybe invisibility…When I was a child people often didn’t notice me cause I never said anything

11. Any fictive character you would love to have as a friend?
Uhm…maybe Rin Matsuoka cause he looks soo hot…Hinata Shouyou cause he’s always so motivated and that’s damn cool in my opinion

And here are my questions:

  1. Who was your role model when you were a child?
  2. What is the most beautiful language in your opinion?
  3. Your favourite fandom?
  4. If you were an animal which one would you be?
  5. Which Hogwarts House would you be sorted into? 
  6. The most well written book you’ve ever read?
  7. Do you like Disney movies? And if you do what is your favourite one?
  8. Who is your favourite fictional character?
  9. If you could choose one talent to have, what would it be? 
  10. Your favourite game?
  11. What is the best place you have ever visited?

@tsukkiies, @sassyhuman, @thekatthatspurple, @miyakuli, @calmcat96, @little-lost-blue-bird, @pinktatertots99, @iamthefacebehindthemask, @iwaizooms, @whyamistillamuggle, @kuroo187

I’m just a piece of shit.  And I’m white. And I’m fat.  And I’m just an asshole that came out of it’s own asshole.  And it sucks…because when you’re young all you want is pizza and you get old and you just BECOME FUCKING PIZZA.  And the toppings are failure and fuck, and cunt. And you just shit out of your own ass like an asshole pizza fuck out of a cunt fuck shit.  Fuck. Why? God. Fuck. Daughter. Fuck.
—  James Adomian’s Louis CK impression is the funniest fucking thing I’ve heard in a long time.

ALL I EAT IS PIZZA! Nanananana

And all I buy is Otasune art. But I think y’all already know that.


@labjusticaholic did another amazing job with these two nerds from our MGS AU, “Run From Their Company”. Omg, Dave’s rumple suit, Hal’s expression…everything about this is so cute.I just want them to cuddle already. XD Thank you for such a cute piece of work!


All the 5 Seconds Of Summer song.

Sounds Good Feels Good 

She’s Kinda Hot
Hey Everybody
Permanent Vacation 
Jet Black Heart 
Catch Fire 
Safety Pin 
Wast The Night 
The Girl Who Cried Wolf
Broken Home 
Fly Away 
San Francisco 
Outer Space / Carry One 
The Space Between A Rock And A Harde Place ( Target Bonus)
Story Of Another US (Target Bonus)

5 Seconds Of Summer 

She Looks So Perfect 
Don’t Stop
Good Girls 
Kiss Me Kiss Me 
Everything I Didn’t Say 
Beside You 
End Up Here 
Long Way Home 
Heartbreaker Girl 
Lost Boy 

Special/Bonus tracks from 5 Seconds Of Summer

Social Casualty
Never Be
Voodoo Doll
Green Light
English Love Affair
Mrs. All American
Tomorrow Never Dies
Independence Day
Close As Strangers

All the other tracks 

Bad Dreams 
Teenage Dream
Gotta Get Out 
Miss You 
Jasey Rae 
Over and Over 
Over and Out 
Broken Pieces 
American Idiot 
Wherever You Are 
Hearts Upon Our Sleeve
Lost In Reality 
Try Hard 
Everything I Want 
The Only Reason 
Can’t Remember 
All I Want 
If You Don’t Know 
I’ve Got This Friend 
The Perfect Disguise 
Out Of My Limit 
Wrapped Around Your Finger 
What I Like About You 
Heartache On The Big Screen 
Too Late 

tagged by: @soughtdawn
tagging: @ofwanderlust bc i love but anyone else who wants can just @ me

name: charlie
birthday: oct. 8
gender: what is that (agender)
orientation: panromantic ace. im also sex-repulsed but idk if that matters??? here it is

favorite soda: any and all grape soda
favorite candy: i like kit-kats a lot

favorite pizza: pepperoni, pesto, cheese, hawaiian, any pizza as long as theres no anchovies

favorite salad dressing:
blue cheese 
favorite meal: all food is good food (eight piece wing combo from wingstop, garlic parmesan and hawaiian)

best memory: what the fuck is this idk
best friend: sylvia and andy

best relative: my siblings, i can’t choose bc im the middle child and they’d all kill me

best pet: i’ve got a dog who i love and would die for but she lives far away :(

best celebrity: i’d fucking die for beyoncé if she asked me to 

one random fact about you: i have cried over dogs on several occasions 
one random fact about your day:  i got a discount on frozen yogurt bc the lady at yogurtland felt bad i was in a wheelchair

one random fact about your job/school: there are less than 1000 students and our mascot is a lame ass beaver

one random fact about your favorite tv show: i hate the host so fucking much but yknow 

one random fact you wish was a fact but it isn’t: got a will to live

The Most Beautiful Melody

Summary: Dan and Phil’s daughter wants to surprise them
Genre: Flufffff, parent!Phan 
Word count: 883
Beta: theinvisiblephan (thank you for reading it even though you’re busy! ^_^)
Disclaimer: I do not own Dan or Phil and I’m not saying that Phan is real. This piece of phanfiction is also a piece of fiction (stop the press!) and I’m not saying that any of this actually happened.
Warnings: None!
A/N: I wrote most of this at work. Nap time is a productive time. :D

Dan was editing his new video in the office when he heard running steps coming towards him and a franctic voice shouting.

“Daddy, daddy, come quickly!”

Keep reading


Aries: Refused to give up playing chess despite having just the king left and went on a killing spree to take all of the pieces they could
Taurus: Got home, said hello, and immediately asked “where’s the pizza”
Gemini: Muttered obscenities under their breath through the entire holiday, despite children being present
Cancer: Drank a fucking mug of melted butter
Leo: Made fun of my redhead uncle by asking “I can’t tell, are you wearing it?” when he put on a bright orange hat
Virgo: Asked for alcohol despite being only fifteen years old
Libra: Sang the Star Wars theme but replaced all the words with “Schaum torte, I want my schaum torte”
Scorpio: Made inappropriate jokes as people opened their Christmas gifts
Sagittarius: Made terrible puns and snarky remarks as people opened their Christmas gifts
Capricorn: Gave relatives presents of whatever stuff they’d left in their car
Aquarius: Tried to convince all of the adults there were “land sharks” as we walked along the beach
Pisces: Wrote a letter to Santa at the age of fifty-two

Seventeen’s Reaction When You Both Want The Last Slice Of Pizza

S. Coups: It’s fine, you can have it if you want! I’ll just order another pizza. 

Originally posted by satanteen17

Jeonghan: We can split it! It is a huge slice after all. 

Originally posted by wolfwasagoodsong

Joshua: You take it, darling, I wasn’t that hungry anyway *cute gentleman strikes again*

Originally posted by kimyuygeom

Jun: Well, I guess you can have it…. I’ll have the last piece next time though. 

Originally posted by chewyjun

Hoshi: This is why we should’ve ordered two pizzas! One whole pizza for the both of us! 

Originally posted by naega-geurae

Wonwoo: I wasn’t thinking of having it so it’s all yours; I’m a bit full anyway *lies a bit so you feel better having it* 

Originally posted by eonwonwoo

Woozi: *finds a way to split it* here we go! 

Originally posted by amillionwon

DK: I’ve got more pizza in the fridge! Take that slice and I’ll put the other one in the oven. 

Originally posted by areumdawoahh

Mingyu: I get it…. My pizza is so good you want the last slice? It’s fine, I can always make more for myself. 

Originally posted by bitesizedmingyu

The8: *after 10 minutes of deciding who gets the slice you both agree not to eat it* 

Originally posted by mingmoon

Seungkwan: We’ll split it! 

You: Seungkwan? That’s not equal…. 

Seungkwan: I know…. I’m giving you the bigger half though so don’t worry….

Originally posted by kai-tastrophe

Vernon: Take it, babe. I’ll just eat the side of wedgies… 

Originally posted by gyuhan-17

Dino: If you want it then you can have it! I’ve got chocolate in the kitchen! 

Originally posted by hanwooz

Enjoy my beauties! Gifs don’t belong to me, credit to owners! 

Admin Amelia


So in the last 2 months, I have lost 10 pounds. And in those 2 months, I have:

•Eaten an entire box of double stuffed Oreos in one sitting

•Drank a bit of beer

•Played video games for a week straight INSTEAD of working out

•Eaten over half of a large pizza by myself

•Slept until noon multiple times

My point is… for all those people who ask “Will eating a piece of cake make me gain weight?!” and “I haven’t worked out in 4 days, is my progress ruined?!” NO. You are fine, love. Relax. You do not have to wake up at 5am everyday and work out for 2 hours and eat nothing but fruits and vegetables. Just be active, enjoy your food, and work hard most of the time. But if you want to eat 6 donuts, by God eat six donuts! Yes, eating things in moderation is best… but if you slip up and eat 30 Oreos like I did, or skip your workouts for a week straight, I promise you will be fine. Just get back into it when you’re ready.

So I don’t walk around like this normally, but I was having a positive body image day today. I am not the thinnest or leanest by far and I have fat and rolls that I carry mostly on my sides and stomach, but I am choosing to love it more often then completely hate myself for it all the time. Instead of focusing on the things that make me feel bad I need to focus on the things that make me feel good because to be honest I am a hot piece of ass and I just need to stop comparing myself. I will be the best me. I probably will never be that girl with abs or a super ripped back. I’m working towards those goals, but to be honest pizza and bagels are my favorite and I’m not going to say no to it when I want it. I’ve changed my diet a lot, but I refuse to avoid going out to restaurants. Enjoying my body no matter what, rolls and all. I’ll achieve my goals one day. I will get there eventually, but I refuse to fall into restriction and feeling bad about eating food and not working out. Okay rant over. Happy Hump Day!

if you wouldn't mind?

Hey y'all, I’m really sick and today was a very hard day, and I was wondering if I could ask y'all a favor, because tomorrow’s looking to be equally as awful and when stuff’s hard, hey, shout out for help.

Would y'all mind doing something nice for yourselves tonight or tomorrow? Just something small is fine, something you want, something like getting that Starbucks latte with extra whip or taking ten minutes to look at cute cat gifsets between study sessions, or snagging a piece of pizza, or telling your friend about that explicit headcanon you have of your OCs.

Would y'all mind doing that? Because selfishly I’ve got to tell you that things will be brighter for me if I can think of y'all out there being happy, having little moments of joy, and of joy there’s never really enough so please, please, please, if you needed an excuse to and if you can, go and grab yourselves some.


Imagine #6: Give me a reason (Luke Hemmings)

Requested: Yes

Word Count: 745

Story line: Luke gets really angry with a guy and you calm him down

Luke and I had an amazing date. He invited me to dinner and later we went to watch Catching Fire. He knew how much I loved that movie and although he didn’t want to admit it, he wanted to see Jennifer Lawrence on the big screen. So, we had a pleasant time.

“I’m hungry” he said placing his arm around me and kissing my temple.

“You’ve eaten all the popcorn. How can you be hungry?” I asked, staggered. He laughed softly and he shrugged. I shook my head as a smile formed in my lips. “There’s a place nearby where they sell pieces of pizza” I informed him. By his smile I could see that he loved that idea.

“Sounds good” he finally said. While we went to the pizzeria, we took the opportunity to talk about the movie. Luke didn’t understand some of the things and because I read the book, I tried to explain to him those things. When we arrived a few minutes later, I couldn’t help but sigh when I saw all those people. That place was famous because it opened till late and it wasn’t unknown for everyone that drunk people tended to be hungry. Luke was the exception; he was hungry all the time. “You can stay here if you want. I’ll be out in a minute” I smiled thankful. I tended to get overwhelmed when a lot of people were around me. I had a hard time when I was in concerts, nightclubs or places like that. It didn’t mean I couldn’t go, though; it depended on the situation.

While I waited for Luke, a guy came where I was stumbling around. He was completely drunk. I tried not to look at him, hoping this way he wouldn’t say me anything; but it didn’t work. I tried not to be nervous. Probably he only wanted to tell me something stupid and then he would leave. “Hello, gorgeous” he finally said, smiling. I looked at him in silence. He frowned and looked at me as if I was a strange creature. “You’re pretty” he said, nodding.

“Thank you, I guess” I answered.

“You talk!” he exclaimed as he pointed at me. Scared by the sudden excitement, I took a few steps back. Just as a precaution, I decided to go inside the store to look for Luke. I actually didn’t enjoy random meetings with drunk people. Also, I didn’t want to stay there not saying anything because I knew that guy wasn’t going to stop. There were three types of drunk: the first type were the funny ones; the second type were the silent ones and the third type were the ones who were looking for trouble. And he seemed to be type three. “Hey, where are you going?” he asked me. I started to panic. “Hey!” he yelled again, this time grabbing my arm.

“Get off me!” I screamed.

“Shh, baby. Don’t scream” he said with a disgusting soft voice. “You don’t want to make a scene, don’t you?”

“Please, let me go” I whined.

Suddenly, I felt a hand grabbing my jacket and pulling me back. When I raised my head to see who he was, I saw Luke with his jaw clenched and his eyes dark of rage. “What the hell, man?” he exclaimed, angry. I had never seen Luke this way and it scared me a little.

“Who are you?” the other guy yelled, confronting him.

“I’m his fucking boyfriend!” he said, grabbing the guy by the chest.

“Luke! Stop!” I yelled, grabbing him by the shirt. I tried to make him look at me, but it wasn’t working. “Luke, you’re scaring me” I mumbled.

“Why should I? I’m so pissed of right now, Y/N. Give me a reason not to beat the shit out of him” he said, clenching his teeth.

“Because I’m fine and it’s not worth it. This guy is drunk, Luke and you’re a better person than he is” I tried to convince him. He finally looked at me and I smiled, softly. “Please, let him go. I’m fine, I promise you” I assured him.

He listened to me and let him go. Then he placed both of hands in my face and kissed me passionately. “Are you sure you are okay?” he asked me, his nose pressed against my forehead. I nodded. He sighed and pressed his lips in my forehead. “Let’s go home”.



“Thank you”

“Anytime, baby”.

anonymous asked:

I'm here for a major argument between Fitz and Jemma. It needs to happen if they both want to move forward together because keeping all those emotions in check isn't good for either of them.

Anonymous said: About FitzSimmons having a proper argument, I definitely need this though it’ll kill me. They need to say their piece without the other interrupting. I want them to argue and cry then order pizza and cry and fall asleep on the couch. I worry about Jemma mostly, because Fitz has the most ammo, not that she’s ever done anything to intentionally hurt him. But I worry because if she shouts or argues back, some will see her as the bad guy, more than they do. I just worry about her. Is that silly?

It’s not silly at all, anon. Regardless of whether or not it becomes a full-out fight, Fitz and Jemma definitely need to talk and sort out everything between them. There are just too many unresolved issues, too many unaddressed emotions to not have a long conversation - and something that doesn’t just happen conveniently offscreen this time.

One of the things I’m really hoping this arc will do is explore Jemma’s side of the story. We know at the end of season two that she was open to the potential of something more with Fitz. But everything was happening so quickly, Bobbi going into surgery and Fitz taking off on a dangerous mission, that we didn’t really get to see that moment for Jemma, the moment when she realizes that “maybe there is.” Perhaps this storyline, while painful, will allow us to see Jemma’s feelings more openly. Whereas in season one there was a heavy focus on the development of Fitz’s feelings (starting from F.Z.Z.T.), perhaps this is the show’s opportunity to really delve into Jemma’s feelings. 

To me, that would be the ultimate payoff for the heartache we’re undoubtedly facing: to see Jemma grow from this experience. To see the pain she’s going through, and not just Fitz’s. To see her make the transition from “maybe there is” to “how could there not be?” To see Jemma Simmons’s “let me show you.” 

The first time you held Michael’s hand was not the way you imagined it.  You and him were messing around, arm wrestling because he bet you the last piece of pizza that he would win. “Bring it on Clifford.” you smirked at him before sitting at the table. You concentrated hard, focusing on pushing his hand down as far as it could go and he did the same, his tongue peeking out the side of his mouth as he pushed with all his might because he wanted that damn piece of pizza. You laughed at the sight of his eyebrows creasing together, breaking him out of his trance. 

“Whats so funny y/n?” he asked.

“Nothing. You look cute thats all” You laughed again as a blush crept onto his cheeks. 

“I’m not cute. I’m tough and I WILL PROVE IT.” He shouted the last words as he pushed your hand down hard, slamming your wrist against the table.

“SHIT” you yelled, bringing your wrist to your chest as it throbbed 


“Michael i’m fine, just get me some ice.” you huffed at him and he scrambled up from his seat, bringing you back a bag of ice with a towel.

“Here, let me” he said grabbing your damaged wrist and pressing the ice lightly to the bruise that was already forming. His fingers brushed over the back of your hand, being careful not to press anywhere too hard in case it caused you more pain.

“I’m so sorry y/n i really didn’t mean to push that hard. i was just concentrating and i got too into it and i…” 

“Michael, its fine i know it was an accident.” 

He took the bag of ice off your wrist and examined it closely, his nose pressing against your skin. You giggled and he looked up at you. “Okay just making sure you weren’t mad at me.” he said softly, giving you the tiniest smile, his eyes regaining their glimmer as relief flooded through him.

“I’ll only forgive you if I get the last piece of pizza.” 


“But that means you’ll have to hold the ice on my wrist.”

 “That’s okay, I don’t mind.”

And that was how you ended up eating pizza with your left hand while Michael’s fingers were interlaced with your right hand as he held the ice there, making sure that you even got the last cupcake that he had been saving for tomorrow.