alien aliens

Something that bothers me about the Humans are Weird thing is that a lot of them focus on humans artificially augmenting their bodies with cybernetics, and that they use those to fight off bad aliens. But what about all of the humans who actually train to fight naturally? All of the Martial Artists who push their bodies to their natural limits and become unstoppable forces of nature. There are lots of martial artists that even focus on fighting from a disadvantage, (unarmed against someone with a sword or other melee weapons.) This bothers me, because by leaving this out you are leaving out a large portion of the Space Orc aspect.

“How odd, this human hasn’t augmented their body to be stronger or faster, they will be easy prey.”

Poor alien. Turns out that human was a descendant from a Russian Cossak who’s family ensured that the art of Sestema was not lost throughout the millennia.

“Oh no! that human is being attacked by that dangerous monster!”

Don’t worry, alien friend, that human was a bear wrestler on Earth.

“Oh, hey, that human is limping along on a cane, he must be a cripple. Easy prey”

Poor alien. Turns out that human practices cane fighting, and although he needs the cane to walk, he knows how to use it as effectively as a sword. and thanks to humans ignoring pain for emergencies, he can go without it for as long as it takes to shatter your exoskeleton.

“Holy shit! That human is huge! He must have gone through lots of gene augmentation!”

Nope. He is a descendant from the Vikings, so he has a naturally larger body, and trains in Judo, so his muscles are huge.

“Haha! I have a gun! This human has no chance!”

Poor alien, This human was a Green Beret and has barehandedly killed lots of people who were actively shooting at him.

this idea really only adds to Humans are Space Orcs, because we put ourselves under massive amounts of physical stress and potential injury to achieve being dangerous to protect the people we love. our hands are not good for hitting things so we figure out how to hit things with them. we push ourselves past average capabilities through intense training to increase our reaction speeds, improve our strength, move in unnatural ways to use a bigger and stronger opponent to our own advantage, etc.

Because let’s face it, even if humans could change our bodies to be artificially faster, stronger, and ore dangerous, there would be a huge portion of humans (myself included) who would prove that we can be just as good if not better through hard work, instead of taking the easy way. 

Even now days, we have groups who are devoted to learning about and practicing old systems of fighting. There is H.E.M.A, Systema, Kendo, etc. Now imagine these groups in Space. 

This gets very Warhammer 40k-ish, but I want space knights, or space cossaks, or space samurai!

Mitchell and Webb satirising famous conspiracy theories really is the best thing ever:

The Diana one is amazing because it does bring up *every* single logical problem with the “Prince Phillip and the royals did it” theory.

“She has to die because she’s too well-liked. Obviously if we kill her now in her youth and prime, she’ll be forgotten about in a week or two.”

I hope they do 9/11 truthers next.

anonymous asked:

Are his blasters like floating masks, or do they connect somewhere in the back we can't see? Also, it looks like the two halves are separate, so could they be pulled apart? ((sorry if this has already been said))

i sketched it like that bc it’s easier to copy and flip one half for symmetry and i have trouble keeping my head up to draw evenly lmao;;

they’re normally locked together. the blaster is like a massive skull that unhinges when firing, and the the holes and split on the head allows excess energy to vent out so the whole thing doesn’t explode. when deactivated, the halves are taken apart for maintenance.