algebra shit

au where everything is the same except im a responsible human being

Imagine if Michael was your math teacher.
“TEN, YOU GOT FUCKING TEN? HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET TEN! THIS IS FUCKING ALGEBRA YOU SICK LITTLE SHIT, WHO THE FUCK COULD MESS THIS UP! FUCK YOU KID! FUCK YOU! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY CLASSROOM BEFORE I KICK YOUR ASS. RRUUAHHH” *throws a chair across room*

some gems from the liberal redneck’s videos:

  • shieet.
  • these are the same mothafuckers who put mountain dew in sippy cups and beat a 6 year old with a wire hanger for standin’ in front of the tv during dr. oz
  • y’ALL are so full of S H I T
  • HARDLY
  • NOT
  • NEVER
  • mouth-breathin’ troglodyte daddy
  • unless you’re also suggestin’ that we have separate bathrooms for catholic priests i think you need ta’ cut the shit
  • you’re freaked out. the thought of a man wantin’ to be a woman DEESGUSTS y o u. 
  • because like most things that disgust you, you lack the capacity to understand it.
  • you know, homos, algebra, shit like that
  • his conservative, transphobic, homophobic facebook redneck friends
  • his thick Tennessean accent
  • are y OU SHITTIN’ ME?? 
  • i got one question: since when do rednecks give a shit about books?
  • y’uns
  • what ever happened to free speech? 

JD ( @gushergurl) feat. my algebra shit whoops
(She probably thinks I stalk her. I’m just really excited that it’s gay and /im/ gay and it’s a big gay party. I’m gonna go jump from the top of a building. Gotta pull a Martha👏 Gotta blast my dudes)

(Has this been done before? I haven’t read comics or other fics in a while)

AU where Jason Todd has been in prison for decades but he doesn’t age because of Lazarus Pit magic, so when he finally gets released he finds himself in Batman Beyond world.

His parole officer is Commissioner Barbara Gordon and she’s all “Don’t make the same mistakes again” and Jason is like “Of course. I just won’t get caught this time.”

And then he teams up with Terry Batman and it’s a new Batman and Robin dynamic except super awkward as hell because not only would they be like Dick and Damian, but Jason is technically older.

So Jason would be all “I don’t take orders from you, kid, I was fighting crime when your parents were learning algebra! …Shit, how do these new weapons work, where are these new gangs I’m looking for, help.”

…Yeah, that’s all I got.

The 100 College AU: summary below

Summary-Could you do an AU for me? one(like a modern one) where they’re all in university and Bellamy and his ‘friends’ are a year older but Y/N has some classes with him, and he likes her/she likes him kinda thing and he watches her from afar but whenever he is around her/talks to her he’s nervous and takes it out wrong? Like he’s a jerk lol. You can make up the rest, long one plz?•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Bellamy’s POV:

I sat eating my lunch with a couple of the guys, they were talking about basically nothing. I was staring at Y/N, she was doing some homework across the yard under a tree. The light was illuminating her beautiful hair, the way it perfectly framed her face.

“Bellamy? Who are you looking at?” Murphy spoke up to me, pulling me back to reality.

“Hey! That girl right there,” Miller spoke up and pointed towards Y/N, still oblivious we were talking about her.

“I understand why you stare, she’s hot Bellamy,” another guy laughed and lightly shoved my shoulder.

I rolled my eyes, I couldn’t let them know I liked her. How much I like her, they’d mock me for it and just end up telling her.

“No, she’s younger than us. I think by a year,” I struggled and drank from my bottle of water.

"Still, she doesn’t look that young if you know what I mean,” Murphy laughed and made a motion that nobody should ever make.

"Nah,” I laughed nervously

Then, the guys went back to talking about football. As I continued staring at the glorious beauty that was Y/N.

Next, the bell rang indicating it was time for classes to start and I grabbed my stuff. Leaving the guys sitting there.
______________
Y/Ns POV

You walked into biology, placed your books down, and sat down. You were about 7 minutes early to class, so you got your supplies out and rested your head on the desk.

"Okay Class!” Your professor practically skipped in with a huge cheesy smile of his face.

"I’m taking attendance,” he declared and took out a clip board.“

"Zoe Monroe!” He called out and Zoe awkwardly raised her hand.

"Clarke Griffin, Monty Green-” he continued and you sat patiently awaiting your name to be called.

"AM I LATE AM I LATE!” Bellamy Blake hollered and he sprinted in the room.

"Another second and you would have been Mr.Blake, please take a seat,” he smiled and Bellamy marched towards the seat in front of you. The boy had an obvious blush on his face, weird.

"Y/N Y/L/N,” he concluded and you raised your hand.

"Let’s get started,” he laughed and dropped the clipboard onto his desk.

"Open to page 37,” he instructed
______________

3 hours. 3 long horrific hours of listening to a small old man talk about biology, which literally could have been summed up in 30 minutes.

As you jumped out of your seat and began gathering your possessions, you noticed Bellamy. The poor boy was sitting at his desk with his hands covering his face in defeat.

"Umm, Bellamy?” You started and he slowly looked up at you.

Bellamy’s POV:

“Umm, Bellamy?” I heard Y/Ns sweet voice and it echoed through my head. I slowly turned my head towards the beautiful girl.

‘Okay, I have to be smooth, but not too smooth. Plus I needed to be kind, but not cheesy. Crap.“ I thought and slowly ran my hand through my hair.

"Hey baby,” I smirked over confidently and thought it was a good start. However, the look of disgust and confusion on her face made me second guess myself.

“Are you alright?” She said taken aback by my comment. I decided to take a new approach towards winning her heart.

“I’m fine! What do you need?” I spit and stood up to tower over the girl.

Yea, I ruined it.

“I thought you needed help,” she said calmly.

“Princess, I can take care of myself. Even if I needed help I wouldn’t want it from you!” I said while my brain screaming at my mouth to shut the fuck up.

Then, the sassy glare turned into pain and embarrassment. Tears started to form in the corner of her eyes. Great, now I’m the guy who made a younger girl cry.

“Y/N,” I murmured and softened my glare, but she was already gone
___________
Y/Ns POV:

“I’m telling you he was an absolute dick,” you spit walking towards your friends.

It was around 10:30 PM, and you all gathered in yours and Octavia’s dorm for drinks. You walked toward them holding a six pack of chilled beer.

“That doesn’t sound like him,” Octavia declared as you sat down next to her on the love seat. She opened her beer while everybody else reached for one.

“Well, I don’t have many experiences to help you with your troubles,” Lexa laughed, obviously already tipsy. She grabbed Clarke’s hand and squeezed tight, looking at her with love.

“But, I did see him looking at you across the yard today while you ate and did homework,” she continued

“Yeah I saw that too!” Raven giggled, bouncing on the bed, as if she just discovered something huge and unknown.

“Calm down!” Octavia laughed and stuck a piece of gum in her mouth.

“O,” Raven started obviously ready to pull the sarcasm out.

“I am majoring in technology! Mechanic stuff and smart people and algebra and crazy shit!” Raven continued waving her beer bottle around in the air.

“You are majoring in something involving swords!” She laughed. She was clearly drunk too.

“Alright, whatever you say,” Octavia smirked and nodded her head.

“I think Bellamy likes you,” Octavia continued and adjusted her feet on the seat next to you.

“No way in hell! I told you what he said,” you replied taking a sip of your beer.

“Y/N, Bellamy has a hard time showing his feelings. Like, he doesn’t like emotions so he shuts them off and it’s hard for him to reopen the factory. He’s been doing that ever since mom died,” Octavia’s smirk turned into an expression of grief, remembering her mom.

“Maybe you’re right-” you started rubbing Octavia’s arm.

“OH MY GOODNESS IF YOU GET MARRIED WE WILL BE SISTER IN LAWS!” Octavia hollered suddenly happy again.

“I’ll speak with him tomorrow,” Octavia declared raising her now empty beer bottle in the air. Which caused everybody to erupt in laughter.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• Part 2 coming soon🔥

I lov contexts I lov the internet I love that on here in our weird girl niche shit like algebra suicide/ the ann steel record are lauded classics/ very basic and when I spin “my time” at house parties irl people act like I’ve come back from another planet with the secret jams in tow we all have a good time

Our Father's Sons, Part Two

“Dad?” Dean’s gun lowered slightly.

“Yes, son. Well, sort of. More like dad, 2.0. After all, it’s only been about 800 years since I sold my soul for you and left for the hot seat. Like you know, hell does things to a man.

You, see that’s why I am here- you boys set up a rescue mission to hell, stormed the gates, made it through purgatory, and for what? For Bobby Singer? For an old drunk who was too terrified to have kids of his own? Who gave up on life after his wife died- a man who couldn’t be bothered to get off his ass to go on more than a couple of hunts a year? Doesn’t seem right, boys. Not right at all.”

Sam jerked his gun up, took one step forward, head cocked and jaw working. His eyes burned, pupils wide. “That’s what this is about? You’re jealous we never sent you father’s day cards? We mourned you! We looked up every way we could think of to bring you back!”

“And when you found the way in, you went straight for good old Bobby. Did it ever occur to you that I might still have been hanging on when you came to hell? That your betrayal is what did this to me?” He jerked his thumb towards his yellow eyes. “Well, it finally got to me- and after all, it seemed fitting that after spending my life hunting the yellow eyed demon that I should become one. There was a job opening, you could say.”

Keep reading

so my algebra teacher’s name is Mr. Saenz (it sounds like “signs”) and he was telling us about how his wife was pregnant and he was debating naming his daughter Co and basically i’m the only one who laughed