alfreds

anonymous asked:

What jobs would the Allies and Axis have if they were humans?

OMG LIKE AUs I’m SO DOWN FOR THIS

Okay.

AXIS

Germany. I have this headcanon that Ludwig is extremely musically inclined. I can see him directing a large, collegiate level choir, starring in operatic tragedies, or being a professional cellist. Outside of the musical spectrum, I could see him being an extremely encouraging (*wiggles eyebrows*) personal trainer, danseur (male ballerina— i wrote a drabble about this once), dog trainer, policeman, and history teacher.

Italy. He’d be in the arts, either as a danseur like Germany, or interpretive dancer. He’d be a great interior designer, photgrapher, or painter. In a high school setting, definitely in charge of the art classes and drama club. He’d make an awesome school principal too!

Japan. I think he’d be an excellent magician for some reason. Like the kind you pay top money for. He’d also be a bangin’ wildlife photographer, and I think he’d be great in animal rescue. I could see him teaching a psychology class, as well. If not those, he’d definitely have an independent business, being a coffee/tea shop and book exchange, where you could get an amazing drink and bring in books to trade at the book shelves lining the walls of his shop.

ALLIES

America. He’d be a great masseuse with those strong hands of his. That could be a great asset in sports medecine.I see him working as an EMT too. If he didn’t do that, I think he’d star in romantic dramas a la Nicholas Sparks, or just military dramas. He could be a Marvel Superhero too, I think.

Britain. A journalist for sure, or travel writer. I could see him being the brains in an early 1900s heist, too (hmmm. I smell an au).Could you imagine him doing talk radio? Because I can. In a school setting, he’d definitely have any sort of grammar and composition classes. Outside of that, he’d be a really sweet acoustic and folky singer.

France. He’d be an awesome chef. I imagine he’d be like Gordon Ramsey, just because he strives so hard for perfection and doesn’t put up with stupidity. In a high school setting, he’d teach Shakespeare courses, fully supporting the homosexual characters that typical curriculums erase.  He’d be great in soap operas, and i feel like he’d teach comprehensive (instead of abstinence-only) sex ed. He’d be a great sex therapist, but not in the creepy way.

China. C’mon, he’s a total hippie. He’d have an herbal cellar store with natural remedies. Dermatologist? I think he’d be great in a spa, too, though I couldn’t tell you why. I don’t connect much with him as a character, tbh, so I don’t have much more on him.

Russia. Oh, c’mon, this marshmallow is totally a florist! If not that, then a gardener or botanist. Definitely in aromatherapy, too. I think he trains therapy animals too.

Canada. Elementary school teacher! Maybe even preschool! I think he’d teach sign language, work as a child psychologist, or as a social worker. If not that, an OB/GYN doctor, working with expectant mothers. Otherwise, he’d work in wildlife preservation, or as a zoologist.

~Admin Mattie

Arthur just came out to have a good time but is honestly feeling so attacked right now. B^|

Eyooo here’s my gift for the USUK Summer Exchange! My drawing is for writingandchocolatemilk who asked for Annoying Fratboy!Alfred. He doesn’t look much like a frat boy hhhh I’m sorry but I hope you like it still- ;; w ;; / <3 

I have this idea that Artie and Alfred go to the same college; Arthur is there to actually learn shit and Alfred just wants the college party experience. Immediately Alfred joins a fraternity and is p much the new lead bro bc he’s charismatic af. He flirts with a bunch of people, but he flirts with Arthur the most. One night at a party on campus, Alfred spots Arthur and constantly tries to hit on him for the majority of the night. Arthur ignores him for the most part but eventually gets dragged away to a less crowded area where he has to sit there and listen to Alfred brag about himself and use horribly cheesy pickup lines on him. u w u b

anonymous asked:

I HAVE A GOOD ONE I HAVE A REALLY REALLY GOOD ONE What would America, England, Canada, Germany, and Japan be like in a Dark!Hetalia au where they come home from war and their s/o is really relieved because hey the countries are actually alive and they didn't know whether they'd come back or not. The only thing that makes it 'dark' is that there would be a much more serious atmosphere as opposed to the light and humorous one that regular Hetalia creates. Maybe angst maybe not?

Oh geez. You fucked up without even knowing you fucked up. Do you realize what you have done.

America. I know he would suffer from PTSD. Can you imagine how bad it’d be on the fourth of July, the one day a year when he should be happy? The fireworks would screw him up. It’d sound like machine guns and grenades and explosives and have him ducking for cover under his bed or covering his head and hiding in the closet. If he were driving, he wouldn’t be able to handle anything crossing the road in front of him. I imagine that if he wasn’t 100% focused, he’d start to drive in the center of the road out of habit. His s/o would probably just need to keep an eye on him, try to clear the house of anything that could trigger an episode, and wait until he falls asleep at night before sleeping themselves.

England. He would suffer from night terrors. Thrashing, feeling the need to fight hand to hand with whoever was next to him in bed. He would have been a dog handler, and lost his dog to an explosion of some kind, and therefore, for mental health’s sake, would have two therapy dogs trained to help him if he is having a breakdown. His s/o would have to get used to the fact that the only reason they are finally getting a bigger bed is so that the dogs can sleep with them, too. They would both be certified service dogs, and would have to come with him everywhere.

Canada. I feel that he would have lost a friend in the war due to a betrayal, and is therefore less trusting, even of his s/o. His s/o would have to be willing to put up with unexplained interrogations: “Where were you? When did you leave? Who were you with? Why? Why weren’t you home when you said you’d be? You told me you were on your way home at 4:45, and it’s 5:30. It only takes 20 minutes to get home. What were you doing in all that time? Don’t lie to me!”

Germany. I feel that he would have been a PoW. He refuses to discuss what happened during his time MIA, but he will with his therapist. It’s hurtful to his s/o, but also a Godsend, considering the things he went through. His s/o made the mistake of bringing out the ropes he so loved to experiment with one night, and learned that if they didn’t want to get hurt, never to do it again. And just like that, the things that the both of them loved to play with had to be thrown out just to make the environment slightly less triggering. And from what they could tell, Germany must have suffered some from knives. His s/o must keep them in a locked drawer now, which had minor splintering around the rivets of the handle from where Germany had tried desperately to get it open during one of his many episodes.

Japan. He can’t handle loud noises of any sort anymore, unless he has plenty of warning. That means no slamming doors, cabinets, or glasses on counters. No dropping things in the shower. No chopping vegetables for dinner unless he knows. He sleeps with ear plugs now, but it doesn’t stop him from randomly flinching in his sleep. It is now a part of his s/o’s daily routine to text him before they close the garage, before they open it again, and if Japan is gone, that they are prepping dinner and to stay calm when he comes home.

In my mind, they all suffer from psychological trauma in one form or another.

~Admin Mattie

anonymous asked:

lets say bruce is turned into a wee babe b/c MAGIC!, who would be the best sitter among the JL + bats? i mean they would pass him around like a communion plate & go wild lbh but who wins at brucesitting? (alfred peaces out cause been there done that)

i think dick would be very good at babysitting him. jason would probably fill his mouth with too much candy (“maybe you’ll finally stop being so fucking salty”), tim and babs would be ok but would find it too weird, damian would pretty much make circles around him because this is finally something he didn’t train for (unless talia got too paranoid and one day walked up to dami and said, “in case your father fucks up again here’s how to babysit”). steph and cass would babysit him together and if bruce didn’t smile with the others, he’d def smile with them fight me on this

about the jl… diana would be AMAZING at babysitting him. bruce would probs get mesmerized and just look at her or try to grab her hair because oooh shiny. clark would be ok (he’s good with everyone) but i imagine bruce staring at him just to creep him out. he’d put him down to sleep and in the middle of the night small baby bruce at the edge of his batcrib juST STARING AT CLARK OK NOT EVEN FLINCHING. hal would finally be able to get on good terms with him, he’d make different constructs and bruce would like clap or something. i generally think hal+barry are the go-to babysitting team when they find kids without their parents

it also depends, did he turn into a baby or did time turn back and he’s returned to being a baby? because the first means he’s crying 24/7 just to tick everyone off, the latter means adorable baby bruce cooing and please hold me i think i put too much thought into this