alexis is pleased

Okay so hockey is like, rife with superstitions and ritual.  

Each player has their own pre-game rituals, which are honestly on par with religious sacraments. You do not fuck with a man’s pre-game ritual.  Also, the inability to practice one’s pre-game ritual is deeply emotionally destabilizing.  Like, we’re talking serious repercussions here.  If a player is unable to complete their sacred ritual, there will be hell to pay.

Just as famous as Crosby’s famous pre-game plate of spaghetti, or Jack Zimmerman’s pre-game PB&J, is Snowy’s pre-game application of eyeliner.  It is not only essential to his game play; it is essential to the current alignment of our space-time continuum.  

Which brings us to Snowy, currently in the throes of an emotional breakdown, in seat 15C on the Falc’s bus, clutching desperately to his last remaining tube of La Nuit, Nior de Nior eyeliner as though it were the cooling body of his only son.

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this is something that has been bothering me for a while

why is it that the majority of check please/nurseydex content on this site always insists that nursey is always in the wrong in terms of (potential) arguments with dex about privilege and the very different lives they live? why do y’all continue to create content where nursey finally has some sort of awakening to the advantage he has over dex financially, but no one mentions dex’s whiteness as an advantage that he has over nursey? 

why have i only seen one post that says anything about DEX waking up to the fact that aside from his financial status nursey has NO OTHER ADVANTAGE OVER DEX? why does dex never fucking wake up and realize his privilege as a white person in y’all fics/headcannons/etc.? nursey is canonically a biracial black person (also reminder: biracial does not always equal half white) and dex is white. dex has an immense amount of advantages over nursey bc of his skin color and i am so tired of that being overlooked. 

where is a fic where nursey sits dex down and explains that nursey may come from money, but dex’s parents never had to give him a talk about how to act bc of how he will be perceived as a black man? dex’s parents don’t have to worry about their children being the next hashtag on twitter as victims of police brutality. dex does not have to police himself in public bc of his race. dex will have greater chances of success than a nonblack person in the same financial situation. i could go on for days about this. 

and let me be very clear: i am not trying to downplay any struggles that dex has to go through, or the struggles of any poor white person, and i love dex tbh. but y’all have to realize that he is still incredibly privileged. and dex needs to realize this in fic/headcannons/etc. as well. and yes, they are fictional characters in a comic and some of y’all might not think it’s this serious but it is a real-life issue and tbh, to an extent some of it is a bit anti-black. please stop subconsciously making nursey the villain in any situation where he discusses these topics with dex.

tl;dr: stop overlooking dex’s advantages and privileges as a white person, and please include it in content y’all create. 

Patater domestic headcanons !!!! Ft Jack

My dumbass is crying over Kent being hated on and the realization of his backstory like I thought I was supposed to hate him. Anyways here are a load of headcanons to cure myself

•Snowy finds out by walking in on them both asleep at Tater’s apartment on the couch. Snowy is like I’m not even surprised tbh and walks back out of the door but Kent and Tater are still asleep on the couch like late at night.
•KIT PURRSON. Tater automatically good with animals. Like Tater is almost like a parent to this cat “KENT WHY NO FEED KIT”
“Oh my go-”
•Kent loves Tater’s chain because I mean why do I need to explain
•during bye week they just pretty much chill with each other in a small rural area near a lake. It was fun until Kent touched poison ivy
•they take fugly close ups of each other a lot.
•one time Tater posted one to his story on sc and Jack saw it before he deleted. They don’t know Jack saw it but when Jack saw it he was actually happy for them. He knew Kent needed this
•Kent and Tater learning each other’s respective languages
•they Skype with each other after games. When one of them are injured they’ll fly down.
•sometimes Kent hates the circumstances surrounding them.
•sometimes Tater will send flowers up to Kent’s apartment and only the manager knows about this. They keep it a secret and they think it’s sweet.
•75% of their relationship is just them laughing at stupid stuff
•"why are you looking at me like that?“
“Ew”
“ALEXEI YOU TOOK THE PHOTO OF ME LOOKING HIGH. NOT EVEN 5 MINUTES AGO STOP LAUGHING”
•Kent always being lowkey attention maintenance
“Hey hey hey hey hey hey hey turn around hey hey hey. Hey Alexei. Hey tater. Hey tater tot. Hey love hey guess what hey Al-”
“What”
“I want this for my birthday”
“It pass Kenny…”
•Sometimes Tater will just give Kent a piggy back ride when he can see the exhaustion in his eyes that he’s trying to hide
•Tater hates thunderstorms. He always has to have Snowy drive him when they come off of the plane. He hates them because when he was little, him and his mom both got into a car accident while it was storming. They were okay just fairly hurt by it.
•Kent moves his room into another room that doesn’t have a window wall for Tater’s sake.
•random 2am “I can’t go to sleep” talks
“Hey I have something to tell you”
“What is it?”
“I adopted Kit because one time I was attacked by a dog and HEY STOP LAUGHING”
•Tater takes one of Kent’s blankets with him while Kent takes some of his shirts
•jack may have found out their relationship when him and Tater share their hotel room and he sees Tater sleeping with it peacefully
•jack’s heart kinda swells because it’s like “hey Kent is happy !!!” But it kinda hurts at the same time since he knows that Kent still kept the blanket that the Zimmermann’s gave him when him and Jack were freezing from practicing outside.
•random and weird convo like this “I can play guitar”
“Really?”
“No”
“Of course you would say that…”
•late night grocery shopping where all they do is just make puns out of things. One time Kent had to sit in the car because he couldn’t stop laughing.
•Kent takes a lot of offguards of Tater. He’s proud of them because they actually look good
•Tater’s wallpaper is Kit sleeping on Kent’s naked back
•Tater knowing what went down with Jack and Kent but he doesn’t mind all that much. He feels like it isn’t going to make him love Kent less and it was in the past
•Kent has nightmares about finding Jack on the floor or how they used to party when they were younger. He feels like he could have prevented that.
•When he wakes up Tater wakes up too so then they both try to go back to sleep together without wordlessly talking about it because Tater knows Kent doesn’t want to yet. So Kent just lays his head on Tater’s chest and plays with his fingers while Tater has his chin on top of his head and occasionally kissing his head. Tater doesn’t go to sleep until Kent does
•Tater doesn’t really try to hide Kent all that much and Kent doesn’t mind the news articles or fans
•they secretly own an another apartment together like a year and a half after they started dating
•Tater can actually drag race
and won’t tell Kent how he learned it but it impresses Kent
•Kent sings romantic cheesy songs into Tater’s face while holding his face in between his hands
•Tater knows how to play the piano and violin and Kent is still very much confused about this
•they once went on a vacation to Brazil and they just pretty much stayed on the beach watching the sunset. Splashing water at each other. Making small sand castles
•sometimes Tater has bad days because he just feels sorta less to everyone in the world. Not the team tho they make him feel welcomed and Kent just reminds Tater that he can speak three different languages and he is still making it
•Tater cries when he’s mad and it breaks Kent’s heart because the first time they had a heated argument was when one of the falconers accidentally shot a puck to one of the Aces’ face after one of their games.
•Kent feels so bad and worried that he’s becoming his old self so he would leave small sticky notes apologizing in every room. There’s like 5 in each room and they’re all attached to where Tater can see them.
•Tater randomly hugging Kent and saying I love you when he feels like it
Kent cries the first time and Tater just silently rubs the back of his head because he knows what happened
•Kent has so many pictures of Tater on his phone like its wild. There are photos of him sleeping to him holding a turtle he proudly held and put back like 10 seconds later
•their trips are like half of the time Kent telling Tater no or not to do something while Tater does it anyways

Bonus: jack is the type of person to get hurt/hit and then stare off into the distance because he’s trying to comprehend what just happened and then he starts to cry

Open to add on !!!

anonymous asked:

46 for patater? and/or 10 for wtf?

46. “Shut up, I am a delight!”

“Kenny, maybe it’s not so good you come for reunion. Russia is… very cold in winter, котенок. Too cold for you, maybe.” Alexi sat at the counter of Kent’s kitchen, large hand wrapped around a rather tiny mug of ginger tea, smile curling onto his cheeks as he watched Kent spin around at the sink, lips pinched into a scowl. 

“I play hockey, Tater. I think I can handle the cold.” Kent replied, eyes narrowing slightly at the smug Russian across from him. 

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4

My mom’s waiting….Keep thinking what you’re thinking. I don’t have a choice.

okay but,,,,, consider alexi mashkov sitting on his couch with a bowl of cereal (approved by his nutritionist, with coconut-milk-yogurt instead of milk) skyping his boyfriends

and he’s chipper as fuck considering the early hour, considering he got up early on his off day to skype his boys before their classes, bright eyed and rosy cheeked as ransom reads over his notes for a test he has that morning and holster chats animatedly about tater’s next game

ransom has a little smile on his face, and he barely looks up but when his eyes are as warm as his smile and tater’s so, so smitten that he just smiles back and calls holster his myshka and and ransom his kotik and tells holster to make sure ransom eats something before his test before letting holster continue rambling about how the falconers are totally gonna smash the leafs and who uses the wrong plural form as their team name anyway tater. who does that.

and they can’t talk long but just before they hang up tater blows them both a kiss and tells them to behave, knowing they won’t, and they just stick their tongues out at him at the exact same time. the screen goes black on their laughing faces.

tater finishes his cereal, rinses out his bowl, and by the time he’s returned to the couch there are two messages in their little group chat, a little heart from each of his boys followed by the crying emoji from ransom. tater just types out good luck myshka before he goes to get dressed, settled in a way that he’s almost started to get used to, in a way that only his boys can make him