alex rambling

seeing that “notes =/= my art’s value but if you spent 6 hours on a cake for a party and no one ate it you’d be disappointed too” post floating around and it exasperates me a bit

i’ve had art i spent loads of time on sit at 5 notes. for years. until, one day, without any warning, one person reblogs it and the next thing i know, the note count jumps up into the hundreds. it is a crapshoot, guys.

i see a lot of people saying that getting no notes makes them want to quit. i know it’s disheartening, to be proud of something and find out seemingly no one appreciates it. that sucks. i get it!

now i’ve had friends not only disregard my art, but make fun of it. art i’d drawn for them as a gift. if you think feeling like no one likes your art sucks, you’re preaching to the choir. my art was mocked. i was told i wasn’t as good as other artists. i didn’t keep drawing for these people or their approval - i kept drawing for me. i looked for my own improvement and took small victories, and over time, i let go of the cruel things people had said and learned to believe in myself again

when my art started to get positive attention, i’d screenshot every nice comment or tag anyone ever left on my art and save it to a “motivation” folder. they were blessings, not something i felt entitled to. even the tiniest remarks meant so much to me.

at one point, one of my friends admitted they were mad at me - because my art would receive more notes. a friend whose art i would regularly admire, someone who i encouraged and believed in, as if my appreciation somehow meant less than numbers on a website. it really sucked, guys!

your art and the time you put into it is invaluable and you should be proud of yourself above all else. to receive no recognition and to create in spite of that is admirable! it’s heart and passion, and it’s going to stay with you a lot longer than a handful of notes. cherish kindness no matter where it comes from - family, friends, strangers - it’s all genuine, i promise, and while there’s no guarantee your art will become popular, you can be the first person who believes in yourself. hang on tight to friends who recognize your hard work, and if you haven’t found any yet, you will

tl;dr recognition can come in many forms, and notes certainly don’t hurt, but they aren’t your only validation. be proud of yourself, keep going, and cherish each and every person who believes in you. every time you post art, it’s a gamble, but personal growth is a constant. someday you’ll be glad you didn’t give up.

ALEX DOESN'T SHOOT HIMSELF

I feel like a fucking idiot because someone just explained to me that Alex doesn’t shoot himself, Tyler shoots him! That’s why Tyler had a gun and that’s why he takes Alex’s picture down from the series of pictures he had hung up. He’s killing them in order.

honestly pedophiles don’t deserve safe spaces, they don’t deserve to have a community because they’re “feelings are completely normal & ok uwu” because they fucking aren’t okay
if you are a pedophile, get help
if you refuse to get help because this toxic, godawful website makes you think being a pedophile is “healthy” i hope u burn in a fire

My sister’s cat Emrys is….an interesting creature…..

I love this cat so much but Ohmygoodness he’s a dumb bean sometimes.

Shortly afterward he laid down and promptly got angry when I steadily folded his new warm bed down to nothing.

Also I see people tagging the ever wonderful @pangur-and-grim to see their screaming purrbeasts, so allow me to jump this glorious bandwagon. XD

Imagine… Maggie and Kara can’t find Alex. The time is running out and Maggie is horrified. She’s been broken before in her life, but she is sure losing Alex will kill her. She fights with Kara about the plan to save her. A lot. Both of them very passionate about their feelings for Alex.

Maggie is sitting in Alex’s apartment, it’s late, lights are out, glass of scotch in her hand. She doesn’t even know how she ended up here, it’s like her feet brought her there on their own.

She’s not even capable of crying anymore. She’s exhausted, desperate and angry. She should be angry at people who took her, but she’s more angry at herself. Cos she is the one not able to help her. To find and save her. Maggie would give anything to get her back, to keep her alive, to hold her in her arms once again.

She pours herself another glass of scotch, looking bluntly over the apartment.

The place she kissed her, after realizing she has feelings for her. And there, when they spent the first night together, making coffee, being so happy.

Quiet sob escapes Maggie’s lungs. They fought. They fought pretty badly before she was taken. And the reason was basically Maggie’s stubbornness. She never said to her how much she loves her.

What if she never gets the opportunity to do so? Was the last words she ever said to her really the angry, sarcastic ‘of course you do’?

Quiet ‘swoosh’ sound interrupts her thoughts and even without looking back, she knows Kara just flew into the apartment.

It’s way past midnight, but she isn’t really surprised Kara is there. She needs to feel Alex as much as she does and this is the best place for it.

Maggie puts the glass on the table and slowly gets up, not saying anything. They haven’t talked after the big fight few hours before.

“I’m sorry,” almost a whisper resonates through the apartment, Maggie surprised at the words coming from Kara’s lips.

Maggie walks around the couch and stops in front of Kara in her Supergirl suit, looking into her eyes. A single tear falling down from her eye.

“No Kara, I’m sorry. You’ve been in Alex’s life for so much longer than me, it’s not my place to assume that-”

“Maggie,” Kara cuts her off, hearing her own voice trembling with emotions. “You make Alex so happy… she’s never been so happy I…. She needs you… I need you.”

Maggie swallows hard, nodding a little. “I love her,” she whispers. “And I haven’t-” her voice fails, ugly sob escaping her lungs.

She feels strong arms wrapping around her shoulders, pulling her into a heartfelt hug.

“I know,” Kara whispers, closing her own eyes, feeling tears falling down her cheeks.

“I haven’t told her,” Maggie is crying. She feels her legs melting into nothing, finally letting go of her restraint, letting her emotions and all the feelings out.

Kara holds her, literally supporting Maggie from falling to the ground. Kara feels exactly the same way. But she knows she must stay strong. There is still time and they will find her sister.

No matter the cost.

“We will find her Maggie,” Kara feels after a while, she can let go of her, so she does. She looks right into Maggie’s eyes.

Maggie is surprised by the severity of Kara’s expression.

“Now is time to cross every line we need to cross. We do it your way and we will save Alex. What do you need me to do?”

Maggie quietly nods. They are going to save Alex.

Together.

The revolution never stops 💪✌❌ france will always revolt🔫❤🔫 got 2 cleanse 💦👊 🔫 P👊a👊r👊i👊s 😱😱 ☀🌙 so people r free😍💪✌revolution 🔫❤🔫👉👉 barricades gonna be LIT🔥😏🔫😏toss bottles of acid on BOURGeoisiE FUCKS🔥the 🎵 music 🎵 of the people who will NOT be SLAVES aGAIN 😤😤  😍✨👌 tomorrow is COMING✨✨
—  Enjolras, probably