alec-speaks

malec-go-to-hogwarts  asked:

hi cassie :) i've been a fan of the books since 2010 and it's been amazing to see how much they've grown in terms of popularity and audience. I would love to know whether you came up with the idea to write the eldest curses because of how popular Magnus became and the reaction to him or was the idea in your head from the beginning and you decided to finally write it :) also could i be cheeky and ask for a snippet from the lost book of the white preferably featuring Alec....

I was excited to write the story of Magnus and Alec Having An Adventure and Falling More In Love for a very long time, but my ability to do so was limited by the way publishing and distribution worked back in 2005, when I was initially trying to sell City of Bones. There was a lot more resistance to gay characters in YA at that time. A couple of publishers turned the book down because Alec, a gay character, was in it. The Barnes & Noble website page for City of Bones included a review from Commonsense Media where they gave it a content warning for “sexual content” just because of the presence of a gay character even though he never did anything sexual. A lot of big box stores refused to carry the book, and major children’s book clubs passed it over. 


I always hoped for systems to change. As the books grew more popular, and as times changed, I was able to include more of Magnus and Alec as the series went on. In fact, their presence in the story and on the page made a big jump starting in CoFA, at which point I received a surge of criticism from those who were upset that I was writing about Magnus and Alec more prominently. I remember having my books pulled from libraries; foreign translators cut scenes with Magnus and Alec in them; once I was standing in the middle of the street about to get into a car to take me to a school where I was going to do a talk about my books when my publicist came up and said we were no longer invited: the school had read about Magnus and Alec and they didn’t want me there. Or often, if I was at a school, I’d be asked not to talk about Magnus and Alec while speaking to the students.


I tried to walk a careful line, including Magnus and Alec (and later, Aline and Helen) as significant and meaningful characters, but still managing to keep schools, libraries, and reading groups from throwing the books out or locking them up where the kids who most needed to read them wouldn’t be able to access them at all.


I held onto the hope that attitudes would continue to shift, to allow for more freedom to write characters who accurately represent the population of the world we live in (and represent my own friends and family, on whom Alec and Helen specifically are based). Hope that I’d be able to expand roles for characters like Magnus and Alec, and over the past twelve years — partly as I’ve carved out my career in a way where I can take the sales hits that sometimes result from major LGBT+ inclusion, and partly because of so many brave writers, readers, editors and publishers who’ve pushed for change — I’ve been able to do so more and more. 


When I was writing CoFA, I purposefully left a gap where Magnus and Alec go on vacation, with the idea that someday I could go back and fill in that gap with a story focused on them. For a long time that wasn’t something that companies wanted to buy and publish. I could have self-published the series, but I wanted the books on the shelves in stores, on the “bestsellers” rack with every other book I’ve written, making a statement about how much people want this kind of book and these kind of characters. I chose to write the story now when I did because Simon and Schuster, my publisher, opened Saga Press, an imprint dedicated to expanding what you can do in YA and cross-publishing with adult fantasy/sci fi. It’s Saga that will be publishing The Eldest Curses.

I thought a lot about what to say here because of two things: one, that people don’t like to hear about pushback against writing non-straight characters — it’s depressing (it is), it seems distant, unreal, how can these old systems and thought processes still exist? We’ve had successful books with gay characters in them! We’re done, right? I guess all I can say is that I think there’s a value to illuminating the pushback because it underlines how important it is to keep supporting books with LGBT+ characters because we are not there yet; we’re not where those books are give the same budgets and marketing and push as books with straight casts, and it takes the support of readers and reviewers and bookstore and library buyers to get us there.

I’d also say that I know I’ll get criticism for saying I was careful in my portrayal of Magnus and Alec until I felt like I’d gotten to a place where even if the fact that they were in love, lived together, even had sex was shown or even just implied (as it is in CoFA) it wouldn’t mean the books were locked up in libraries and slapped with warning labels. I guess I can only say it’s hard to navigate a situation where you fear the very kids who need to read about Magnus and Alec won’t be able to. When you meet kids who say “This book saved my life” so many times, and you think “But what if you couldn’t get to it? What if your school wouldn’t carry it, or your library, or your Walmart, which in small towns is sometimes literally the only source of books?) I accept that criticism. We all face hard choices in life and we make complicated decisions we think are for the best, and being criticized for those decisions is part of living and learning.

I guess the only other thing I’d say is whatever shitty things were said to me over the years about Magnus and Alec, they pale in comparison to the shitty things said to writers like Malinda Lo and Scott Tracey who were writing their own lives and experiences in the form of LGB characters on the page — and as Malinda says, their pain at confronting homophobia/biphobia will always be more visceral and personal than mine.

If you go out and buy The Lost Book of the White of course I’ll be thrilled, and a lot of that will be because it’s a way to show publishers that this kind of media and these protagonists are wanted and desired by readers. But I’d be just as thrilled if you picked up any fantasy by an LGB+ writer with LBG+ characters in it. There’s a ton of wonderful stuff and I hope you’ll explore it.

Reason for the MPD Spam

I haven’t actually ever said anything here about it, so here it is.

I have Multiple Personality Disorder, a disorder which forms alternate personalities inside of my head. We share the same body, and talk to one another, but we share a body.

I’m Zen, I text normally, and talk in the natural “default” of our voice. I’m 15, Agender, and Asexual and Panromantic.

!I’m Alec, I text with everything preceded by a “!” to discern myself. I use the natural “default” of our voice as well, I’m 17, male, and very gay.

+I’m Vex, short for Vexenalia, and I text with a “+” preceding everything, and I speak with a higher pitched tone than Zen or Alec. I am 19, female, and pansexual/panromantic.

We’re all here. None of us want to hurt each other, and none of us want to hurt you. We don’t “fight for control” or anything like that. We have our own likes, dislikes, and hobbies, and all have very similar moral compasses.

Alec is slightly insensitive, but still tries his best to be kind.

Vex is like a mother, and does all she can to help.

I’m just like I was before.

We’re here, and we’re valid, and we’re not like all the MPD media.

ughhhhhh. Went to yaoicon dressed in my totally unfinished jack cosplay not expecting to see anything at all even remotely related to hijack or even jack or hiccup. Then a couple dressed AS hijack walked past and I was shocked but I had to stop them and ask if they were hijack as well, to which they said “yeah” but then just walked off after sending me massive indignant vibes like I was bothering them, only to stop and take pictures and talk to people literally two steps away from our table. And honestly it ruined the whole convention? Because I went in not expecting anything at all for the ship and instead I got slapped by it and anyways I just wanted to vent about my first convention so that was awesome and I feel awesome rn.

“I was excited to write the story of Magnus and Alec Having An Adventure and Falling More In Love for a very long time, but my ability to do so was limited by the way publishing and distribution worked back in 2005, when I was initially trying to sell City of Bones. There was a lot more resistance to gay characters in YA at that time. A couple of publishers turned the book down because Alec, a gay character, was in it. The Barnes & Noble website page for City of Bones included a review from Commonsense Media where they gave it a content warning for “sexual content” just because of the presence of a gay character even though he never did anything sexual. A lot of big box stores refused to carry the book, and major children’s book clubs passed it over.

I always hoped for systems to change. As the books grew more popular, and as times changed, I was able to include more of Magnus and Alec as the series went on. In fact, their presence in the story and on the page made a big jump starting in CoFA, at which point I received a surge of criticism from those who were upset that I was writing about Magnus and Alec more prominently. I remember having my books pulled from libraries; foreign translators cut scenes with Magnus and Alec in them; once I was standing in the middle of the street about to get into a car to take me to a school where I was going to do a talk about my books when my publicist came up and said we were no longer invited: the school had read about Magnus and Alec and they didn’t want me there. Or often, if I was at a school, I’d be asked not to talk about Magnus and Alec while speaking to the students.

I tried to walk a careful line, including Magnus and Alec (and later, Aline and Helen) as significant and meaningful characters, but still managing to keep schools, libraries, and reading groups from throwing the books out or locking them up where the kids who most needed to read them wouldn’t be able to access them at all.“

— Cassandra Clare

2x08 coda because so much happened and my boys need to talk 

Once the others have finally poured out of his home, taking at least part of the nervous energy still lingering against the walls with them, it takes Magnus a few seconds to locate Alec and he feels a twinge of anxiety when he realizes that he’s left the safety of the loft in favor of the balcony. Even knowing he’s undone the spell that allowed his guests’ greatest fears and insecurities to fester, the thought of Alexander alone up there makes him vaguely nauseous, images of Alec’s graceful fall too fresh in his mind, too painful still, for him to bear it. 

If he had been a few seconds late… 

But Alec is nowhere near the ledge now. He’s sitting on the sofa, forearms resting on his thighs and head in his hands, fingers tensed and angry where they’re gripping his hair. 

It’s been a long evening for all of them, upsetting at its best and terrifying at its worst, and Magnus wishes there was an easy way to approach this, a simple phrase that could make it all better for both of them. 

He makes his way the couch carefully, steps loud enough to alert Alec of his presence, before letting his body drop heavily next to him. He links his fingers together between his legs, resisting the urge to touch Alec, to force him to look up so he can try and read his face. Instead, Magnus presses his thigh against Alec’s in what he hopes is a comforting manner. So much happened in so little time and he has no idea where he should even start.

He’s still trying to figure it out when Alec speaks first.

“I’m not going to let anything happen to you,” he says fiercely into his hands.

“Alec-” 

“I’m not,” he repeats and Magnus knows what’s hiding underneath, the guilt and anger of all the times Alec has felt he failed the people who matter the most to him.

“Hey,” Magnus says instead of replying, putting a careful hand on Alec’s body, adding a hint of magic to his touch, warmth and safety against the broadness of his back. “I know what you’re trying to say but that’s not on you.” 

“Yes, it is,” Alec argues, body tense like the string of his bow. 

“It’s on all of us,” Magnus argues, keeping his voice calm despite the anger boiling in his veins. “Shadowhunters, Downworlders…. we’re all going to pay for Valentine’s actions if he’s not stopped.” 

He still can’t quite believe Clary kept her secrets for so long when they all should have been working together to stop Valentine’s plan. 

“I know,” Alec replies, leaning into Magnus’ body for a second before taking his hands off his face and straightening his back. “I know that, but that’s not…” he sighs, frustrated. “That’s not what I meant.” 

It’s been a long time since Magnus has been on the other side of such fervent protectiveness and he shivers a little at the intensity of Alec’s determination, mind flickering to the charm he now carries everywhere. 

“The thought of losing you…” Alec continues, closing his eyes and shaking his head like he’s trying to convince himself that saying whatever he wants to say is okay, is allowed. “I just found you,” he says softly, trying again. “And thinking about what might happen to you…. it’s just… unbearable.” 

“Well now you know how I felt, seeing you out there,” Magnus replies seriously, gesturing towards the ledge, heart beating faster at the sound of Alec’s sincerity. “And I think you know I can easily take care of myself.” 

“I know,” Alec sighs. His eyes wander to the ledge for a second and he grimaces, clearly uncomfortable at the thought of talking about it, but aware that he can’t say nothing, that Magnus won’t be satisfied by that. “I’m sorry if I scared you,” he whispers. “The spell messed with my head, it’s true but I.. I don’t… I don’t want to talk about Clary or Jocelyn. Please.”

Magnus waits for a second, looking into Alec’ anguished face, his closed eyes and defeated posture, and he wishes he could drop it, he really does. 

“You’re not weak Alexander.” 

Alec flinches, trying to move away from Magnus’ body but he’s too quick, moving both of his hands to grip Alec’s shoulders. 

“Letting a demon in,” Magnus whispers directly into Alec’s ear, “feeling consumed by guilt… even failure; none of those things make you weak.”

“Magnus,” Alec begs shakily. 

There are things magic can’t fix, memories that burn deeply within Alec’s core that only time can soothe and no matter how powerless Magnus feels, he has to accept it. 

“Okay,” he whispers before kissing Alec’s shoulder, right next to where his thumb is still digging into the flesh. He lets go slowly, starting to move away from Alec when he feels him grabbing his hand. 

“Thanks,” Alec says, voice small but grateful. “And I’m sorry about tonight.” 

“That wasn’t your fault.” 

“I mean about my mother… and Max,” Alec says with a gulp, eyes wide and sad.

Magnus smiles softly. “I knew what to expect from Maryse when I agreed to throw this party, Alexander. And Max is just a curious child.” 

“Yes but…” Alec hesitates for a second before inhaling deeply and exhaling. “I’m still sorry if he made you feel uncomfortable,” he says after a few seconds, reaching up to stroke Magnus’ temple with a few calloused fingers, stopping in the corner of his eye. 

Magnus feels his smile slipping and he wishes he could hold on to it, wishes he could pretend for a few more seconds, but he feels exposed, cracked open, and Alec has already taken a peek at the rawness inside. 

“I’m more worried I made you uncomfortable,” Magnus admits in a small voice. 

“What?” Alec frowns, looking sincere and offended and isn’t that the most incredible thing. “No, no. You could never make me uncomfortable,” he says vehemently. “Not for that,” he adds softly, leaning in to press a tender kiss in the corner of Magnus’ eyes. 

Magnus leans into the touch, appreciating the warmth of Alec’s body against his, the warmth of his reassuring words. 

“A lot of people have been,” he admits and he wasn’t planning on saying that until it slipped right out of his mouth. He can feel Alec exhale against his skin, heated and tickling. 

“I can’t imagine how,” Alec replies and Magnus turns his head to face him, letting the glamour drop easily. Alec gasps in response, a tiny thing that doesn’t sound disgusted or overwhelmed. “You’re so…” he smiles, cheeks reddening. 

“So what?” Magnus asks, curious now that Alec’s face is painted with embarrassment. 

“Kind,” he replies like it’s the most natural thing in the world.

“Oh,” Magnus says in a small voice and he has been called many things in his lifetime but he’s rarely been called kind, even if he’s always tried to be.

 “Clever,” Alec continues, hazel eyes bright with intensity. “Beautiful. Powerful.”

“Alright,” Magnus chuckles, putting a hand on Alec’s chest to try and stop him.

“I just mean…. that it’s another part of you and there’s isn’t a part of you I haven’t liked so far.” 

“Oh Alexander,” Magnus teases, a hint self-deprecating, “that will come.” 

“And I’m looking forward to it. To get to know all the parts of you that fit with me and all the parts that don’t… and all the ways we’re gonna work to be together despite those.” 

Alec clears his throat and lets his gaze wander to where their legs are still touching. He starts fidgeting like maybe he didn’t mean to reveal this much and Magnus is almost glad that he broke their eye contact because it gives him the time to blink a couple of times and stop himself from crying. 

There are so many things that Magnus could say, so many feelings intertwining in his chest. Instead, he grabs the lapel of the suit he carefully chose for Alec and drags him into a bruising kiss, swallowing the way Alec sighs and moans so beautifully. 

They’re still pretty lucky, despite it all. 

“Why don’t you come in? We can talk.”
AlecXReader

You were the youngest and newest Cullen Clan member. Alice had seen you and from there her and Jasper set off to find you. When you returned with them you were met with nothing, but love and affection from your new family. Growing particularly close with Carlisle you had heard all the stories of the Volturi and of his time with them. They interested you and terrified you all at the same time. You emphasized with the twins most and understood what made them so cynical as vampires. That’s why when you heard they were coming for a visit you made sure to be as polite and well-behaved as you could be. Your first impression when Aro walked through the door was “Woah I wish my hair was a silky as his,” which needless to say earned a slight smile from Edward. Cauis looked exactly as he had been described to you, perpetually pissed off. Marcus seemed to have no interest in why they were there and what was going on, and you couldn’t blame him. Felix was the next you noticed, he loomed at least a foot and a half taller than you and had a physique similar to Emmett. You bet that would be one heck of a fight if it ever came down to it. Next to Felix stood a shorter man who you recognized to be Demetri, Amun had spoke of him the last time Carlisle and you had visited Egypt. You knew the capability of his power and found it absolutely fascinating. A girl about three inches shorter than you glided up to Aro’s right side. This was her. This was Jane. She looked different than you had imagined. Her hair was pulled back into her signature bun and her red eyes scanned the room several times every minute, as if she was ready to drop someone at any moment. Her cheekbones were sharply defined and her lips were thinner than yours. She made eye contact with you and you immediately dropped your gaze to your painted nails and started to chip off the gray and red paint. You only looked up again when her burning gaze left your body. When you looked up a boy had moved to Aro’s left side. You almost took a sharp intake of breath but quickly regained yourself. This was Alec. He stood with his shoulders square to make him look broader and his feet shoulder with apart. His face alone was beautiful, much like his sister his cheekbones were high and defined, but his lips were plumper. His red eyes glittered under fine, thick lashes, indicating they had fed recently. His dark hair was sweeped the side and it framed his face nicely. His hands were clasped behind him beneath his cloak and his arms rippled every minute or two showing that he was clenching his fist. You heard someone clear their throat and your head snapped in their direction.
“Aro, this is Y/N, the newest member to our clan,” Carlisle spoke giving you a soft smile as you looked Aro in the eyes giving what you hoped looked like a welcoming smile.
“Y/N, what a lovely name for a lovely young lady” Aro spoke taking tow strides forwards and grasping your hand.
“Tha-” you didn’t get to finished before your human life flashed before your eyes as Aro saw it. Your first day of school, your first crush, your best friend, your prom dresses, your car, your parents, your siblings, the car wreck that you “died” in, he saw all of it and you had never felt more vulnerable in your existence.
“What an extremely ordinary life you had, Y/N,” Aro commented striding backwards to his spot between Alec and Jane.
“I-Um-thank you, I guess,” you stuttered trying to regain composure. Aro gave off a light laugh before Marcus stuck out his hand to him. Aro quickly grabbed for it pushing Alec back slightly, as if what Marcus was offering him better than the blood he craved. Not seconds later Aro’s loud maniacal laugh filled the kitchen where the clan’s were gathered. Edward was beside you in seconds in a defensive stance
“No, I will not let my baby sister be mated to him,” Edward hissed.
“What is it Aro,” Carlisle said calmly, as if he already knew the answer to his own question.
“Miss Y/N here, is Alec’s mate, dear friend,” Aro said dreamily like, as if he had hoped for this very day. My mouth fell slightly agape as I made eye contact with Alec who hadn’t even broke composure. He was stoic, he showed no shock as I did. Jane, however, looked as if she was ready to burn me right then and there.
“No,” Emmett growled and moved to stand by Edward in front of me, “Out little sister isn’t about to be mated with a Volturi guard.”
“Your ‘little sister’ has no choice, fools,” Cauis spat, looking for a fight. Emmett growled and started to move forward. You grabbed his arm and attempted to hold him back as Felix moved forward. You had bet that a fight between the two would be a good fight, but you did not want it to be over you.
“He is right, Emmett, you have no say and neither do Alec or I. I’m sure if he had a choice he would chose different,” you pleaded with your brother. Fortunately, Emmett backed down and so did Felix, but the tension still stuck in hot and heavy in the air.
“May we stay a few days, Carlisle. So the new mates may get to know each other before she comes back to Voltaire with us,” Aro smiled as if the encounter between Emmett and Felix hadn’t even happened.
“Of course,” Carlisle nodded much to your horror. Yes, Alec was beautiful, but did you want to be mated to him? You weren’t for sure, he put you on edge, they all did.
The days went on and you didn’t even speak with Alec. Yes you two had your fair share of state downs as you tried to find the right words to say to him. What do you say to him? “Oh hey my names Y/N, nice to finally meet the guy I’ll be with for the rest of my immortal life,” some how you didn’t think that would quite cut it. Jane had been staring you down every time she saw you. You understood why, she feels like you’re going to take away her brother and he’ll not have anytime for her anymore. You understood where she was coming from, but it was seriously making you panic that she would light you on fire if you turned your back to her. You decided enough was enough and it was finally time to talk to Alec and maybe Jane if she was with him at the time, so there you stood in front of the white oak door with your hand raised ready to knock. You debated for several minutes before lowering your hand and moving to back away. Right as you did though the door swung open.
“I’ve been waiting for you to knock, but seeing as you never did, why don’t you come in? We can talk,” he spoke smoothly.
“Uh, sure,” if you would have been human your face would have been redder than that really bad sunburn you got when you went to the beach for spring break one year and didn’t wear sunscreen the whole week.
“My sister feels as if you are going to take me away from her,” he bluntly stated closing the door behind him.
“I promise you that won’t happen, I know how much the two of you mean to each other,” you say hugging your arms to your chest and turning to face him. You fiddle with the ends of your long sleeve shirt as you waited for a response.
“Good. As long as you know my sister will be a priority over you,” he was very cold.
“I know, I am sorry. I know you don’t want to be mated to me. I’m in no way pretty and by no means special. I don’t even have a power,” you apologize lowering your gaze from his.
“You are very pretty, Y/N. Please do not think otherwise. And you are special. Well now you are. You’re the mate to one of the witch twins. You will be respected because others will be afraid to disrespect you because you are mine,” his slender fingers wrap under your chin and lift your face to look at him.
“No matter what you may believe Y/N, I do want you and I believe with time we can learn to love each other. For now though, no I don’t love you, but you are mine.”

-Admin Magda
(Feedback always welcome! Request are open!!)

nah but what if steven got a call from sadie that trans lars was having a really hard time today trying to buy clothes after someone said he shouldn’t be buying these clothes and so steven is running out the door when pearl’s like “steven! where are you going? we have a mission.” and steven just turns around and is like: “me too. a transmission.”

My aesthetic: Gideon speaking in Spanish to Sophie, Jem speaking in Chinese to Tessa, Cecily speaking in Welsh to Gabriel

LOS SPOILERS
  • Zara Dearborn: *speaks*
  • Alec: excuse me?
  • Magnus: Dearborns... *eye roll*
  • Kieran: I suggest you stfu
  • Emma: who the fuck does she think she is?
  • Julian: ????
  • Diego: our engagement is fake I swear
  • Cristina: bitch
  • Diana: if she thinks Downworlders are a disgrace to Shadowhunters she should meet me
  • Jia: how is that rat still breathing
  • Every Downworlder ever: this is the reason we hate Nephilim
  • Sane People: wtaf
  • The Cohort: Brilliant, amazing, the next Jace Herondale, so intelligent, perfection
  • Zara: Is he sick? I didn’t think warlocks got sick. Wouldn’t it be funny if he died before you? I mean, what with him being immortal, you must have thought it would go the other way.
  • Alec *slowly raising his head*: What?
  • Zara: Well, I mean since Magnus is immortal and you, you know, aren’t.
  • Alec *voice colder than ever*: He’s immortal? I wish you’d told me before. I would have turned back time and found myself a nice mortal husband to grow old with.
  • Zara: Well, wouldn’t that be better? Then you could get old and die at the same time.
  • Alec *rage starting to fill the room*: At the same time? How would you suggest we arrange that? Jump off a cliff together when one of us started feeling sickly?
  • Zara: Maybe. You have to agree the situation you are in is a tragedy.
  • Alec *raises and is in full hero of past battles mode*: This is what I want and I have chosen. How dare you tell me it’s a tragedy? Magnus never pretended, he never tried to fool me into thinking it would be easy, but choosing Magnus is one of the easiest things I’ve ever done. We all have a lifetime, Zara, and none of us know how long or short it might be. Surely even you know that. I expect even you know that. I expect you mean to be rude and cruel, but I doubt you meant to sound stupid as well.
  • Zara: But if you die of old age and he lives forever -
  • Alec *sure as Hell of what he's saying*: Then he’ll be there for Max, and that makes both of us happy. And I will be a uniquely lucky person, because there will be someone who always remembers me. Who will always love me. Magnus won’t always mourn, but until the end of time he will remember me and love me.
  • Zara: What makes you so sure?
  • Alec *speaking as he is attesting facts*: Because he’s three thousand times the human being you’ll ever be. Now get out of here before I risk his life by waking him up so he can turn you into a garbage fire. Something that would match your personality.