per usual, i’m doing all of my important things at an obscure hour, so here it goes ! recently, i hit four hundred followers and this upcoming sunday will be the three month milestone for this blog. to have such exponential growth in a short amount of time truly makes me both extremely proud and thankful ! when i initially came back to rp at the beginning of july, i never would have anticipated for tumblr to make the impact that it has had on me. a part of me wishes i could dive into more personal detail, to break away from this persona which many have found intimidating. if i’m to be perfectly frank, however, communicating my personality to its full extent online puts me in a very vulnerable position that i know can end in negative repercussions. i just wanted to preface this with that little blurb, that even if i come off as detached, i really do appreciate each and every one of you who have lent your support. many of my muses hold a deep personal significance to me and i thank you all for letting me portray them as i do. without further adieu, let’s begin.

            @heartattck: i really don’t know where to begin with this especially when i’ve reiterated my love for you in so many different ooc posts that at this point it just seems redundant. i am also in Proper Punctuation mode here so ?? i think i’d just like to start off by saying how thankful i am that we found each other. we complement each other disturbingly well to where i don’t feel the need to go into keyboard smashes and <3’s to express my love for you because that’s simply not our style. our affection is hidden in the little things: not feeling the pressing obligation to message back for hours sometimes, but resuming the usual conversation of talking shit once one of us replies as if we had never left off. it’s asking if the other one’s eaten, slept, how their progress on a project going. it’s little things that are easy to take for granted, yet i seldom experience them to the same extent as i do with you. even though you’re all the way in new jersey and i’m here in nevada, the emotional proximity means much more than the physical. the support, honesty, and mutual respect you’ve shown me throughout our friendship is incomparable. i love our conversations whether it’s about our millions of ships or if it’s simply about our days. i know you’re going through a lot of difficult things right now, things that if i had the power to, i would take away for you. but you’re strong, as fucking cliche as that sounds, and i admire that resilience. you’ve contributed so much to my life both emotionally and creatively. i love you and i really hope for you to achieve the happiness in life that you deserve.

            @delightfour: oh my god you’re so Smol :((( that’s how i’m choosing to begin this lmao. i know we’ve addressed the fact of you (and admittely me as well) forgetting my age, but it’s seriously true. even though you’re three years older than me, i still have this violent urge to Protecc you so hard. you’re such a kind, pure soul and as much i tease you *looks over at that ask meme i did on you*, i really do love you a lot ! as much as i love our ships, you as a person are just so overwhelmingly wonderful that i just want to focus on that ?? i really adore hearing commentary about your day, you sharing the small details such as your kyungsoo poster or jongdae singing “bolero.” you’re honestly just so chill and i love having that aspect in our conversations. we go from anal beads to exo asmr and we don’t judge each other throughout any of it. i feel like we would be super cool with each other in person. except also idk how that would work lmao since i’m a booze stan and you like hookah ! i mean i’m down to try and i know you would take some shots too but… yikes this is seriously all over the place and not how i envisioned it at all, but i was deadass about the whole kind, pure part. you’re honestly one of the nicest people i’ve met on here and you’ve supported me through a lot of things that i’m just extremely grateful for. i wish that you slept better and that your brother would stop coming up on your food, but as long as you have overall happiness, i’m good !

            @gcldenhearts: dee ! ah, you’re so cute sometimes, it really just makes me enthusiastic and smile :)) it’s just comfortable to talk as easily as we do and to have known each other (in my position considering i’ve only had this blog for a short time) as we have. i’m really grateful and surprised at just how organically our friendship formed. i’m not always the easiest to befriend since i’m wary of people at times, but you’ve just been so upfront with me this whole time and i appreciate it so much ! i never would have expected for replying to one of your open starters to lead us to where we are now. also you’re like the only one on here who relates to my sexual frustration lmao… even when we’re not writing together, i still feel your enthusiasm for our ships and it really means a lot ! i love it when you send me ask memes and us judging jinki and mina for the murderers that they are. i’m still curious on which one of us is going to get laid first since i deleted my tinder and self-imposed isolation, but you also haven’t been having the best luck on there either ?? even though we dated from an ask meme for one whole week, i support you going out there and getting the love you deserve ! aside from that, i can tell you have a lot going for you with university, especially since your educational system is 1000% better than ours ! i hope you stop having so many bad dreams and if you dream at all, dream of taehyung and/or jinki since they are practically the same :-)

            @powerpuffs, @slideivy: al;sdjf;lskdfj is it bad to put you two under the same paragraph in a follow forever ?? it’s just that you two have such a wholesome marriage and i am completely here for it ! the two of you are such soft human beings and a breath of fresh air on this blue hell, i swear. ara, i adore our threads together and the natural chemistry hongbin and jinri have with each other. like they just complement each other so well and even though our children are going through Pain together right now, i still think they’re completely adorable. speaking of adorable, you’re literally so fucking cute, i swear ?? i hope one day i can come to the philippines and squish your cheeks and have you teach my whitewashed ass some serious tagalog. but then watch it not be the same dialect and then i come back home to impress my fam and they’re just like wtf :// i know you’re busy with university and i’m extremely proud of you for focusing so much on your studies, even if it’s not the field you dreamed of ! catholic school is probably rough on your ass, but you’ve proven yourself to be an intelligent, capable individual ! a, i seriously appreciate you so much ?? you stanning my muses as hard as you do just makes me so thankful for all the effort i’ve put into their portrayal. i adore your writing and muses as well *coughs jihyun* and i’m really happy to have had the pleasure of interacting with you in threads ! i hope you and ara have a long, happy marriage, not only for your own joy, but also so i can enjoy your eleven (think i got the number right lmao) ships together !

people i admire from afar/want to interact with more !

           @nochugrl, @honeyedsmiles, @paidsoul, @blazedfires, @dulcetmade, @niqhtowls@ofgoldandroses, @liquoredwish, @cacotheisms, @plvnetarium, @profiile, @divinexwreckage,  @heartfeltflowers, @jennics, @feralglory, @loveslorn, @creamistries, @intcrweaved, @noxwrites, @thcrnful, @leviaraelle, @flcwerway, @justlysts, @emflesque, @mcrtel, @scrcndipty, @psychotropic, @jenyxr, @epheriad, @throughthedcrk, @jamaixvu, @lalisanas, @okeydokeyhoe, @lilvcsxngs, @holypatronus, @fckxillusion, @lonelylot, @gcholdtrops, @gcthigh, @reiinstated, @shrinemade, @moonshinedrowned, @reapedrose, @lonelylot, @zenosyvn, @pvlchritudine, @pvxilatc, @100lcttcrs, @dearcherryblossoms, @armoredmoon, @pityfigures, @lullcbies, @spikedjoy, @authenticxs, @simpaticos, @beautekissed, @saiko1x1, @amatitas, @poisonlaced, @bodybcg, @ovrdosc, @minesok, @obscvne, @xiaolong1x1, @gravltys, @lilvpad, @sgtfilth

anonymous asked:

After years of telling myself I just wasn't cut out for relationships, that I was too awkward, too anxious, too this or that -- I found someone who matched all of the things about myself I found to be serious obstacles in having a relationship. Someone who fit the strangely shaped puzzle piece like myself - perfectly. And now I'm realizing: who am I to think that I'm any more special, or any weirder than anyone else, y'know? Everyone is capable of love and being loved. I wish everyone knew that.