aka the very beginning

here is my reflection post for this mental health week. 🌟💖🌟 i encourage you all to do the same.

really, i think this whole journey started from the very beginning, aka birth. i guess i was a fighter from the start, i was born two months early (along with my twin brother) and we spent two months in the NICU. despite this, apparently we were really good babies. (i have asked my mom multiple times about how i was as a baby—as of course you are curious about why you are the way you are! aka have a mental illness.) but she said i didn’t become trouble until i was around 5, when my sensory issues began. clothes bothered me SO much. i refused to wear jeans, only specific sweatpants. i had to have no tags(i still cut them off today), i pulled on the collars of my shirts, i didn’t wear underwear. one time my mom had to carry me out to our car wrapped in a blanket because i was completely naked and she couldn’t get clothes on me. also around this time i was diagnosed with ADHD. i went to different treatment places, some natural therapy place (basically hippy, you know with scents and natural methods??? my mom had a better word for it….) occupational therapy, then medication, then regular cognitive therapy when i was 10, etc etc. But i kind of “grew out” of my severe sensory issues, i still have some but it isn’t too bad.

but along with this, i always had a problem with anxiety. Always. i didn’t like new things, or change. i spent most of my time alone. and i never invited friends over my house or to hang out and stuff. when i turned 15 ½ i was like “oh i will get my temps when i turn 16” and i kept on shoving it off like it wasn’t a big deal. did the same with getting a job. i never realized how this related to my anxiety, well i think i made myself blind to it.

my senior year of high school was when things hit the wall. my marching band season was more pressure and anxiety inducing than normal( yeah i know it’s “marching band” but i swear to god you guys this band was fucking intense and i am surprised i never freaked out more those four years) i was a section and squad leader plus one of the members in my squad was special needs and that REALLY stressed me out. i felt super responsible of everything he did and it made me scared of practice every day. it’s kind of sad to look back at it because honestly band was always my comfort bubble but that last season really had me on edge.
then the normal senior shit began to happen. looking at colleges, choosing your future. i was having more and more breakdowns. college was always in the back of my mind. i didn’t know what i wanted to do with my life. i was worried about expenses. i kind of wanted the real college experience so community college didn’t seem that great to me. plus i at the time viewed going to community college as a “failure”. by november though, i decided to go to community college because i didn’t know what i wanted to do. I could just go there for two years and then transfer. my mom, knowing i was struggling with both wanting the college experience and staying home, said if i go to CC she would get me a corgi puppy. (aka stella💕) i had to meet with a guidance counselor in december to talk about my future plans. he gave me an application to the community college. i didn’t fill it out until march because i was so scared.

then i was worrying about HOW i was going to get to the college, which is 15 minutes away. i didn’t have my license. i managed to get my temps in february, meaning i would be able to get my license right before school started. i viewed myself as being a loser college kid if my parents drove me. but i didn’t even start practicing driving until may, and i haven’t practiced since august of 2015.

around that time, march-ish, i finally agreed with my mom that i needed to see a therapist. (literally for years almost every month i would have a breakdown and my mom would go “you need to see a therapist!!” And i would go “no!!!”) she then started to look at places. and picked one just by looking at their faces, assuming female and relatively young-ish would be good. it’s funny because the first one she picked turned out to be switching locations, so we had to pick a different one. (aka my current therapist) my first visit with her was may 2015.

that first summer with her was focused on my transition to college. i was terrified to sign up for classes, sign up for my college email, and go to pay for classes. (In April I went to a campus tour with my mom and for 15 minutes prior i sobbed my eyes out in a Dunkin’ Donuts parking lot) i realized that driving and getting a job had to be put on the back burner. I had WAY more bigger issues to deal with. plus i don’t think i really committed myself to trying and getting better until early 2016. yes, i was going to therapy, but it felt like i was just going to rant and complain instead of taking initiative.

when i look back, i am kind of amazed by how far i have come. mostly with my internal self. my mind is a lot more frustrating and exhausting lately, but that’s because i am fighting and questioning myself more. i am not giving in. i think of what to do to help myself improve in both the present and future. i realize the importance of treating myself with love. it’s still a long process, but i will get there. like right now i am trying to get a job. and i am even thinking about emailing this lady because the application hasn’t been accepted yet so i think i could just reach out to her myself. me, being assertive? i would have sobbed my eyes out if i was just THINKING about this two years ago. I willingly let my anxiety and depression take over whenever they came around. i can’t say the same this time.

i am trying my hardest! and it is very validating that my therapist agrees. she points out how much i have grown these past two years. sometimes you have to sit back and reflect about how much change you have gone through, and appreciate how amazing you really are.


Yami and the Ink Machine doodles, Yugi edition!

AKA, Yugi being done with everyone’s shit from the very beginning.

Some highlights:

-Yugi pretty much adopting all the Toons cause fuck you Seto, no more hurting the mostly-innocent characters

-Yugi attempting to eat 15+ year old soup and failing

-Toon!Yugi, inspired by the amazing Toon!Henry au

-And “Yami” pinning his prey down, ready to finally get payback for being abandoned by his creator

anonymous asked:

Hello! I'm new to the fandom but I remember reading awhile ago about something about the blue and green during the concerts like harry wearing louis' colors on purpose because fans were supposed to pick their fave and wear the colors? Thanks 💙💚

Hello! It started with the WWA tour when finally they had their microphones separated by stickers (?) because before then they kept mistaking each other’s microphones. 

Harry and Louis had green and blue stickers on their mics respectively, the colors representing their eye color.

TL; DR: this answer turned into a masterpost of all the communication tools HL used in 2016 (blue and green on RBB, bandana project, selfies, rbb, skulls shirts, missing nail polish on left ring finger, mia at the same time, triangle tattoo, eagle tattoo, blue and green in clothing, blue and green on social media, Harry landing at LAX on Jan 20)

I know this wasn’t your initial question and I swear there IS a lot of mentions and pictures about blue and green but there’s so much more as well. ;)

Keep reading


Once again, it’s FRIDAY FASHION FACT! All the time I get asked: In past centuries, why did little boys wear dresses? The answer is simple- it’s all about practicality.

You have all seen the images, whether it be in art or in the movies, of the little 18th Century toddler wearing a frilly white dress. Girls and boys both sported the look. The first thought is probably, why dress such a young child in such a pristine look? Kids are so messy! Were the child in a delicate silk, then yes, it would be highly impractical. But a durable cotton or linen was another story. Mothers throughout history dressed their children in white for the same reason so many parents dress their children in white today- you can bleach the hell out of it. In the days before washing machines and Clorox for Colors, a lot of outerwear would only be spot cleaned. Of course, wealthy families would dress their children in colors and fine fabrics occasionally, typically for special occasions and such. This is important to keep in mind when you see portraits, which are often over-exaggerations of reality.

Wearing a dress was far more practical for both genders. Remember, spandex and stretchy fabrics did not exist. Try to imagine trying to coax a squirming baby into a pair of structured trousers with button closures. Seems like it’d be challenging, to say the least- not to mention how uncomfortable it would be for the child. Now think about the fact that babies grow by the day. With no stretch to the fabric, children would be growing out of their trousers every few weeks. This is also why children in the 5-10ish age range would wear short pantaloons or knickers- since they were cropped already, they hid growth better.

Finally, there was the diaper factor. These days, so much has been done to make the diaper changing process as simple as possible- disposable diapers with stretchy sides and tape closures, onesies that literally come off with a snap, and wet wipes, ready to use and toss as necessary. In past centuries, though, dresses were the best option to simplify changing diapers.

There are many rumors that dressing both genders the same as infants was due to high infant mortality rates, that by not distinguishing genders could make loosing a child slightly less difficult. This is just a rumor. Though both genders wore dresses, there were distinguishing features. Hair styles were the most common (once long enough to be cut.) By toddler years, when children were old enough to have some structure to their clothing, girls’ bodices would mimic adults, while boys’ would often button up front. Trims would also reflect the respective adult versions.

When boys reached the age when they were fully toilet-trained, they would be breeched- aka, they would begin wearing trousers. The occasion was a very big deal, and typically marked the point where fathers became more involved in raising their sons.

Want to learn more about historical infant clothing? Check out these books:

Children’s Clothes Since 1750, by Clare Rose

Clothes and the Child: A Handbook of Children’s Dress in England, 1500-1900, by Anne Buck

Have a question about fashion history that you want answered in the next FRIDAY FASHION FACT? Just click the ASK button at the top of the page!

R like Grantaire : in the alphabet, O and P are inseparable, but what is there between E and G?

(Number 2 in The Alphabetical Reading Of Enjoltaire Series. First post here.) This is a very quick and rough note because 1) I have work to do up to my gonads and 2) I am actually preparing a linear literary analysis of OFPD and of R and E’s dynamic in the brick in general. BUT I NEED TO SHARE THIS NOW (and I’ll structure this better later in a longer, more detailed and complete post that actually makes sense.) 

For now : R like Grantaire, E for Enjolras… what about F?

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Well I knew Namjoon aka Runch Randa before debut and I stained bts from the very beginning

Dang ya lucky, I wish I knew them before or during debut tbh 😂

Day 1 of Richonne Love

aka 40 Days of TWD Positivity!

Let’s start at the very beginning….

The Meeting

Two broken warriors. Two survivors who have lost  someone they loved to the horrible world they now live in.

He sees her from a distance as he comes out from the darkness into the light.
Is she real or a dream?
He walks closer, squinting his eyes, reaching for his weapon just in case.
She’s a woman standing amidst the dead. How can this be? How is it possible?

She sees him walking toward her. She needs his help but is afraid.
Is he her salvation or the means to her end?
She can’t go back so she has to take a leap of faith.


When building a powerful love story, you need an iconic first meeting and Richonne had that and then some. Upon re-watch (which I’ve done too many times to count), it had everything. 

All the meaning, the beauty, even the music to signal ‘something is happening here.’

And, oh my, something definitely did.


Everyone’s doing it lately and I felt like I was missing out the party so I’m jumping on the train hahaha :D
Here you go, my final follow forever for 2014. this time more detailed :)

So first let me tell you something about my absolutely fave people here which I adore more than anything in this world ♥

♥ Chloe aka ouat-swanprincess
- I’m pretty sure she’s my long lost sister hahaha we have soo much in common and she’s just flawless and she’s everything, love you my angel buddy :’) ♥

♥ Emily aka evilregalemily
- my bae, what’s there more to say? hahaha :D she always knows how to make me smile and she’s simply the cutest person ever, love you soo much sweetie :3 ♥

♥ Hannah aka flounderyoureallyareaguppy
- my beautiful little Snow :‘3 she’s one of the kindest and sweetest people I’ve ever met here on tumblr! simply amazing! love you :* ♥

♥ Amanda aka kjtgp1
- she’s soo talented, a true artist! :) and she’s such a warm and sweet person ♥

♥ Shannon (Shan) aka notevildear-wicked
- okay so her ideas are literally the best!! *bows down* she’s soo kind and amazing and her fanfics are awesome! :D ♥

♥ Mary aka frozenandhooked
- she was with me from the very beginning and she is just so optimistic, caring and adorable and I love her soo much :3 ♥

♥ Hailey aka queenlocksley
- my sherlock santa hahaha :’D she’s really awesome and such a talented and passionate fanfic writer! :D ♥

♥ Agnieszka aka lookoverboundaries
- she’s a real sweetheart and it’s always a plesure to talk with her :) ♥

♥ Lara aka cersai
- she’s soo kind, caring and supportive, simply a cutie pie ♥

♥ Stacey aka somethingtostrivefor
- we haven’t talked that much but from what I got she’s really sweet and amazing! :D ♥

♥ Nikki aka softspokenandopenminded
- she’s awesome, kind and always knows how to make me smile :) ♥

- she’s soo supportive and witty and really sweet! :) I’m glad to have her as my friend ♥

Now here’s the rest of the beautiful people :)

A - D
a-resilient-heart  alwaysavillain  beautifulsq  beautyandtheenchantedrose  bewarethedropbears  calmskiesfierynights  charmingfamily  cherryblossompanda-chan  cordeliadeanfoxx  cradleandall  cursed-evil-regal  darkbloodheart  deserving-a-tiara  disneyfacies  disneyprincessmia  dreamsandz

E - H
emmastormborn  evilqueens-badwolf  feytasticly-lana-kinglet-fables  finding-waltdisney  foreveranevilregal  forgetfullittlemonkey  freifraufischer  growingupisaterribletrap  highfunctioningsocio  hoodsladyregina  hooked-captainswan  hope2x  hopelesshoneyxo  hopeperchesinthesouls

I - L
i-miss-christmas-247  imthequeenofevil  indubitably-disney  kaijanolan  katiejshead  katylol  lamphead003  lanaptheevilpanda  leiebella  littlechippedteacup  lizziethewanderer  lost-girl-swan  lost-in-kristanna

M - P
madkingofstorybrooke  melazon  merryelsa  mrsparrillamills  nextstop-bway  ninjakitti  oncebg  onceuponadisneydivergenttribute  onceuponadisneywish  one-girl-once-upon-a-dream  once-upon-my-feels  oneresilientheart  ouat-addiction  ouat-in-neverland  ouat-the-hell  outlaw-queen-true-love  outlawqueenbeeregina  parrillaslanas  perpetualdisney  perpetual-little-red  pirateswaan  polyj83  princessesinwonderland  prinzessinvanellope  punziesdreams

Q - T
queen-thirrin  queenclaudiaofarendelle  raggedycaptainswan  real-life-ariel  rebs28  regina-mills  regina-queen-mills  reginashappiness  robinskisses  rolandsbeanies  rumplebumpled  saaanders  sailordisneyballerina  sassmasterregina  sassofstorybrooke  secondchanceforoq  shipandwrite  skyliange  spoonful-of-fandoms  sttilinskipack  stanaworshiper  theevilqueenmayor  theinvisibleoneishere  thesorcererstale  thiefqueeen

U - Z
vivalaapples  when-im-human-again  whitebuddah0524  witch-slap  youguysaretoocute


This was my first year on this blog and I’ve met soo many amazing people and you were all soo welcoming and warm and I’m soo thankful to have you all, I really don’t know how did I deserve you ♥

I just want to thank you for all your positivity and caring but mostly thank you for your love and support, for being always there for me, for being more than just followers, for being true friends. ♥
I love you all more than anything and I want you to know that I’m always here for every one of you no matter what! :)
You are all amazing and beautiful and I don’t know what would I do without you ♥ I love you sooo much ♥

Happy Holidays and I hope 2015. will be a year full of successes, love, peace, friendships and happiness for all of you :* ♥

Cecelia Ahern “The Time of my Life” book review

Many thanks to myimpressionsoflife for this brilliant review! <3
Позвольте мне прочитать тут оду Машиному слогу. Многие из вас наверняка уже знают ее блог - но знали ли вы, что этот человек красивейше пишет еще и на английском? То есть не просто “хорошо” пишет, а именно красиво пишет. Кроме того, Маша обладает таким талантом - использовать нехитрые, часто используемые, но очень литературные слова, поэтому обязательно занесите их в свои карманные словари =) Вообще, мой совет: всю эту рецензию сохраните. 

When people hear the name Cecelia Ahern, the first thing that pops up in their head is “P.S. I love you” – her first novel, which Cecelia wrote at the age of 21 and which was put on screen several years later. However, this Irish writer and novelist has a lot of other brilliant works that tend to remain slightly underrated. And “The Time of my Life” is one of them.

Synopsis: 29-year-old Lucy Silchester doesn’t realize she has a problem (or problems to be more specific) until a magic letter from her own Life emerges on her threshold. For the last three years after a painful break-up Lucy has been taking her life for granted, isolating herself from the world in her small apartment and building up the wall of lies to hide the real state of affairs and avoid any awkward conversations with her friends and family. But it comes to the point when Lucy can no longer ignore her Life as it shows up at her doorstep in a form of a sloppy but determined man. Life follows Lucy around while she goes through all sorts of revelations and tries to find the way to make things right.

Cecelia is known for her romantic storylines, tender imaginative narration, witty humour sprinkled with tiny bits of magic. Her novels make you feel like you’ve been given a big warm hug, they evoke your emotions and thoughts and are perfect to read on a nasty day to brighten the mood.  “The Time of my Life” perfectly fits all of the above and, apart from that, it makes you reevaluate your own life. Following the journey of Lucy Silchester you find yourself thinking I have/had this problem, too!” or “Her problems are so familiar to me!”. We all may need to stop once in a while and ponder whether we are doing things right and going where we need to go.

However, Lucy had an advantage over us ordinary people, because Life summoned her and she had a chance to visually see when things were improving with the appearance of the man (aka Lucy’s Life) being the indicator. At the very beginning he wore a dirty creased suit, had disheveled hair and bad breath but as time went on he started to grow into a pleasant, good-looking, neatly-dressed and genuinely happy person. Naturally, there were a lot of ups and downs in this transition, especially in the early stages when Lucy had to open her eyes and truly see who she had turned into. According to Life’s words, Lucy was “half-assed”, wasted time, never finished anything “that’s not a bottle of wine or a bar of chocolate”, changed her mind all the time and couldn’t commit. Quite harsh, isn’t? But still a whole lot of people including myself would relate to that.

The journey of finding yourself is definitely a road worth taking, no matter how challenging, frustrating it might be and the last passage of Cecelia’s book sounds like it was aimed to prove that, to encourage people to deal with the mess they’ve made, to never give up and lead this journey through till the very end.

I’ve read this book twice and still find it very helpful in times of inner struggle and in the process of sorting my life out. So, I’d definitely recommend it to those who are ready to embark on this metaphorical train, especially if you’re a lover of chick-lit and beautifully-written romance like myself.

Let us know what you think of “The Time of my Life” or which other chick-lit books you enjoy reading. Have a nice day!

to pop up (in someone’s head): всплывать в голове, в мыслях

sloppy: неряшливый

revelations: откровения, открытия 

nasty: противный

to re-evaluate something: переоценить, пересмотреть, переосмыслить свои взгляды на что-то

ponder: задуматься, размышлять

ordinary: обычный

to summon: призвать, вызвать

More words to describe a book!

tender: нежный

witty: остроумный

sprinkled with: присыпленный чем-то

to evoke someone’s emotions: пробудить какие-то эмоции

to brighten someone’s mood: поднять настроение

tend to: это выражение можно перевести по-разному - как правило, иметь тенденцию, иметь какую-то склонность. Я так и не смогла найти универсального русского перевода, но, надеюсь, основная мысль понятна.

underrated: неодоцененный
overrated: переоцененный

synopsis: краткое изложение, описание, аннотация

take something for granted: воспринимать что-то как должное

with the appearance of life being the indicator:

had turned into: отличное использование Past Perfect

inner struggle: внутренняя борьба

embark: приступить к какому-то начинанию, действию, путешествию и т.д. 

Words for describing people!

Positive: pleasant, good-looking, neatly-dressed, genuinely happy.

Negative: half-assed; глаголы: wasted time, never finished anything “that’s not a bottle of wine or a bar of chocolate


I don’t know why but everytime I see Tangled, after having watched GoT, I always draw similarities between Jaime and Flynn aka Eugene. The way Jaime behaved with Brienne in the beginning very closely resembles the way Eugene does with Rapunzel. Both of them spend some time being hunted down. Both of them were seemed kinda like a jerk in the beginning but later we changed our perspective of them. They both hated their present lovers in the beginning, and were forced into the journey and the only reason they travelled with these women was because of an expectation of freedom form the person. But they end up falling in love. And also, I find similarities in their attitude and personality. Jaime has always been compared to the beauty and the beast and physically to prince charming from Shrek, but I find this one pretty convincing. So yeah, the next time you see Tangled, let me know whether you see the similarity.