HO HO HO my journey into the fandom was a rather superficial one lmao pls don’t laugh at me…
It was a beautiful, beautiful day, like with the sun high up in the clouds and all that cheesy shit. i was scrolling through my old blog and i saw a photo of jimin, a random, SUPER random photo of jimin on my dashboard, aka:
and i fell, ass deep in love with this attractive man… but ofc, I went to check up bts and ended up falling in love with the other 6 members, so yes here i am, dedicating a blog, creating graphics, creating concepts just for the 7 of them.
How did you get through the last episode of the first season? I just only finished the first season on Netflix and not only have I not slept for a few days, I am still crying. JULIA JIST WANTED TO MAKE THINGS BETTER AND MAN WHAT THE FUCK
You poor soul. That last episode was a roller-coaster. I think I was mildly prepared, having read the books, but even then there were a lot of surprises! Aka Julia’s little (big) play at the end haha. At least you can go straight onto season 2 now!! Prepare yourself lmao, shit gets real.
(aka that one Starrk-is-Regulus-Black fic I really, really should not be writing but somehow am?? I swear this was supposed to be a drabble to exorcise the plot bunny but now there’s more of it. Oops.)
The memories don’t start coming
back until he finds the door.
It’s a small archway, far
removed from any of the main paths through Las Noches; the only reason Starrk
even finds it is because Lilynette insists he can’t sleep in their room all day
and harries him out the door to take a walk. It’s easier to give in to her
insistence sometimes, so Starrk covers a yawn and lets her shove him forward.
Because the only thing Starrk
wants less than to be awake in general is to have to interact with his fellow
Espada, no matter how grateful he is to have comrades who can survive his
presence, he turns off at the first branching side corridor, ignoring
Lilynette’s huff of disapproval.
“You wanted me out of the room,
and I’m out of the room,” he reminds her pointedly.
Lilynette punches him in the
side. “I wanted you not to be lazy, Starrk! This is you being lazy!”
Well, that’s true, more or less.
But he’s not being entirely lazy, so
that should be good enough for her. If he says that, though, Lilynette will hit
him again, so Starrk keeps his mouth shut beyond a faint sigh.
With a squawk, Lilynette punches
him, this time in the hip. “Don’t sigh at me! Aizen-sama said we’re going to
fight soon! You need to be more enthusiastic, Starrk!”
Starrk has no attachment to the
idea of fighting Shinigami—his greatest hope is that whatever captain he
encounters ends up just as lazy as him. Then they can stage a fight until Aizen
gets what he wants, and there will be little risk and less effort required. Not
that he’s going to say as much to Lilynette, who’s still glaring at him.
“I’ll fight,” he concedes,
hoping that will placate her.
“You’d better,” she mutters, but
as he hoped she subsides with another huff.
Danger temporarily averted,
Starrk turns his attention on their surroundings, though there isn’t all that
much to see. An endless white hallway without windows, corridors branching off
of it and doors set into the wall at scattered intervals. Las Noches is boring, though Starrk supposes it’s
better than an empty desert stacked with Hollow corpses.
“Do you think the Shinigami will
be strong?” Lilynette asks, and Starrk glances down at her in surprise. Her
arms are folded behind her head, and her one pink eye is fixed ahead, though he
can tell all of her thoughts are turned inward.
He makes a noncommittal noise,
even as his hand falls unconsciously to rest on his sword hilt. “Aizen-sama was
a Shinigami,” he points out.
Lilynette just makes a face.
“Aizen-sama is hardly a Shinigami anymore,” she retorts. “The others, how strong do you think they’ll
Strong, Starrk is sure, and he
grimaces a little bit, not looking forward to the battle. But Aizen wants Soul
Society crushed, and to do that they need to defeat the thirteen divisions. After
that, Aizen will make his way to the Soul King and take the throne for himself,
but Starrk doesn’t particularly care about that part. The other Espada are his
friends, if some reluctantly so, and all Starrk wants is to keep them. Anything
to keep from going back to before, even if he always had Lilynette with him
What use is power? Starrk thinks bleakly, glancing down at his
sword. His fingers tighten around the hilt, the creak of his gloves all too
loud in the silence. Why would anyone
want more of it?
“Starrk?” Lilynette asks
curiously, and Starrk blinks, glancing up. She’s ahead of him now. He hadn’t
even realized he had stopped. Apparently seeing that on his face, she trots
back to his side, curling her fingers into his sash and leaning around him.
“That ugly old curtain thing? What’s so interesting about that?”
Not quite sure what she means, Starrk
glances over at the wall and—
The corridor branches here, and
about halfway down it there’s an arch covered by a tattered veil. It’s
fluttering faintly, even though there’s no wind within Las Noches, and there’s
a low, insistent whisper from the other side that Starrk can make out even a
fair distance from it.
“Can you hear that?” he asks,
but it’s as if someone else is speaking. He can’t look away, doesn’t want to. A
step forward, out of the main hall and into the side corridor, and it’s only
Lilynette’s suddenly firm grip and stubbornly planted feet that pulls him up
“Don’t, Starrk!” she says
insistently, and when he glances back there’s something almost like fear in her
face. “There shouldn’t be voices, that’s creepy!”
Exasperation makes Starrk roll
his eyes, though he stops moving. “You turn into a talking gun,” he reminds his
other half, and she makes a face at him.
“Yeah, but that’s different!”
Starrk supposes that it is.
“It feels…familiar,” he says,
and can’t quite help taking another glance at the veil. His sword suddenly
doesn’t feel entirely right in his hand—it should be smaller, lighter, black
walnut instead of steel. But that makes no sense at all, because a sword is—
Hands. Hands on him, dragging
him down, wet and cold and entirely immovable. He chokes for breath but there’s
only water filling his lungs, a burning, searing thirst that nothing can
quench. Memories, fears, loneliness that sears like fire straight down to his
bones and he thinks This is how I die.
Alone, lost, abandoned—
The inside of his left forearm
This time, Starrk doesn’t need
Lilynette’s urging to take a step back.
“What the hell was that?!” she
demands, and her voice is shrill enough that Starrk knows she saw it too. Not
unreasonable—they’re the same soul split into two bodies, after all.
“I…don’t know,” he answers
But that’s not quite true.
There’s the image of a castle,
somewhere in his memory. An old house, tall and dark and dreary, with a cold
man and a sharp woman and a reckless boy within. Not good memories, not
exactly, but they don’t come with the overwhelming fear of the first
recollection. All of it is linked, tied together by that not-right feel when he
touches his sword. Starrk flexes his fingers, glancing down at them as if
they’ve become someone else’s, but he sees no change in them. Nothing outwardly
remarkable, but…he can feel it.
A green spark crackles to life
and crawls across the backs of his knuckles, then sizzles out in the air.
“Let’s go, Starrk,” Lilynette
insists, tugging hard on his sash. Her one eye is wide and the closest to
fearful that Starrk has ever seen it. “I don’t like it here.”
Starrk doesn’t, either, but—
He drags his eyes away from the
fluttering veil, closes his hand more firmly around the pommel of his sword.
“Let’s go,” he agrees, and it takes everything in him not to turn around and
look back the moment he steps away.
The whispers fade away behind
them, even though Starrk half-thought they wouldn’t.
“Geez,” Lilynette mutters when
they’ve put a good distance between themselves and that hall. She folds her
arms behind her head again, even though she still looks faintly wary, and
huffs. “Aizen-sama’s got the weirdest crap floating around, doesn’t he,
It’s been a long time since
Starrk stopped trying to get Lilynette to be respectful of anyone, so he
doesn’t bother answering beyond a faint hum. He keeps his steps long and
purposeful, and wonders how long it will take her to notice—
“Oi, Starrk! What the hell are
we going back this way for?! Starrk! I’m talking to you, you big jerk! Oi, oi,
oi! Don’t you dare go lie down again, I just got you up! Starrk!”
Please talk to me about single dad ko raising his and Akane's kid
dang you’re brutal
i respect it
ok here goes - akane dies from unidentified disney-mom-syndrome (aka “the sickness”/accident/got shot/died in the field of duty/perished off-screen/etc etc) and kou’s left in the aftermath with their one-year old daughter
much as i’d like kou to be the noble grieving single dad/widow, he’d probably end up self-destructing like he always does. ginoza and the others probably take care of the kid for a good while after akane’s death.
kou gets his shit together (aka akane visits him in a dream and tells him to get his shit together aka idk insert your wake-the-fuck-up-kou scenario here). kou reconciles with his daughter.
some days are better than others. but after being absent for that long, he’s never turning his back again, no matter how hollow and how aching his bones feel to even get out of bed and go through each day.
one night, the kid (im not good with names. let’s call her mushroom bc that’s kou’s eventual nickname for her as she grows older. she absolutely hates it, like her mother did.) wakes up crying. kou doesn’t believe in baby monitors; her crib is in his room so he wakes up alongside her. kou tries to calm her down but she keeps on crying. he tries to sing, lull her to sleep, feed her her bottle, but none of it works. he just kind of rocks her for awhile and he doesn’t know when the tears start until they’re already out and he’s spouting off a litany of apologies (“–i’m sorry she’s not here. i’m sorry i’m not her. i’m sorry i’m not good at this–”) until the words kind of run together and absurdly enough, that’s when she starts to calm down.
masaoka helps a lot. he knows what it’s like.
she grows up to be a relatively independent child with a big penchant for adventure. she takes a lot after kou: his perceptiveness; the dry, unexpected snark; his love for books; his capacity for overlooking the rules. but the sense of wonder, the earnestness, the stubbornness, the heart and the empathy – that’s all akane.
kou does his best. but he’s deeply flawed and mangled. there are times when he’ll unwittingly hurt her because of his distance, because they’re too similar to even understand each other, because there are times where it’s painful to even look at her. she can’t change most of those things but at the very least, there’s a reason why she keeps her hair long on purpose.
she never asks him what akane was like. she’ll ask her uncles and her aunts and grandma tomoya but never him. one thing she knows for certain is that her mother must be close enough of a miracle to get someone as shut-off as her father to open up. in some ways, she envies akane for that.
it’s not always bad days. she loves her father and she knows she’s the most important thing in his life. he picks her up from school, helps her make a macaroni house for an arts and crafts project, teaches her the basics of self-defense, lets her doodle on his most prized books. when they’re both a little older, she’ll take him to the park and have a nice walk or go to the nearby bookstore to fill his shelves. even when she’s eighteen, when she finds herself falling asleep on the couch – without fail, she will wake up in her bed, blankets tucked in and secure.
she loves her aunts but who can blame her for wishing for a mother? her father takes her matchmaking attempts with an endeared sort of humor and it is only when he sets her down and tells her straight out that he doesn’t need anyone else but her that she finally stops.
he’d be the type of dad that all her friends would admire and be slightly intimidated by. even though she complains otherwise about what a goof he is. examples: starts nicknaming her “mushroom” on purpose after she gives herself a horrendous haircut after finding some safety scissors tucked away in a drawer somewhere. steals her fries when she isn’t looking. jokes about doing a background check on the people she dates (she suspects he’s not fully kidding). is intentionally candid and shameless so he can embarrass her whenever she invites her friends over.
if there’s one thing kou does well as a father is that he doesn’t coddle and doesn’t patronize. if asked a question, he will give out a straight answer. when she starts going through puberty, he doesn’t even bat an eyelash at any of her inquiries. he’ll walk out of that pharmacy and carry out a box of tampons and birth control with no problem.
because he trusts her enough to do things for herself, she’s pretty open with him about a lot of things. if there’s one flaw in their relationship, it’s certainly not awkwardness or lack of trust on her part. the first and only time she ever lies to him is on the 15th anniversary of akane’s death. she visits her mother’s grave by herself and when he asks where she’s been, he doesn’t challenge her claim even when they both know she’s not telling the truth.
the first time they have a proper conversation about her mother, she’s already 20 and in college. during a visit back home, she finds an old photograph of akane at the same age she is now and when she finally asks him what she was like, the conversation isn’t the easiest but it’s certainly not as difficult as she thought it’d be. the true answer is long and beyond words because akane was and is a lot of things for him but the simplest one he can give her is that “she was a lot like you”. whether it’s a relief or disappointment that his answer is not at all surprising, she isn’t certain.
she travels a lot as she grows older and never really stays in one place for too long. she never gives notice when she returns to japan to visit her father so in all respects, he shouldn’t know when she’s coming. but even then, it’s as if he knows anyway regardless. there will always be a second empty plate for her on the table and her old bedroom will already be made and waiting as if he always expected her to come home from the start.
she doesn’t know her mother enough to love her. but from seeing how much her father does, it’s a bit of a comfort to know how much she would as well had things been different.
hi! so i love your fics and you probs get asked this a lot but i thought i'd ask you for some fic recs since you also seem to read a lot and know of the underrated ones. if that's cool :D.. i'm looking for stuff from the old cs fics, if you read a lot of those? cause i'm interested to read the fics from the early days of cs and idk where to start. I've read SSTTR, Path that Moonbeams Make, The Daring and The Devious and love them all. Heaven Disturbed,I'm reading next. Any others you can rec? :D
Dude, I never pass up on a chance to go digging back through early days fic. I love you for giving me the excuse, I went a little wild with it to be honest. I actually had to make myself stop at things first published a year ago, AKA around when ‘In The Name of the Brother’ aired, because the list was getting too long. (Except I did also throw a couple of my faves in just because.)
I’ll divvy by oneshots/shorts and longer fic. Shorter comes first:
Important Information - There is an information sheet in Granny’s diner where people post important information; it’s hijacked by some personal conversations. This is really funny, and short so no reason not to read.
A Worthy Gamble - Emma makes a deal with Hook to learn about his knowledge of Regina’s plans. I’m unreasonably fond of this little oneshot for some reason.
Longer plottier ones are below. Since a rather high proportion of these haven’t been updated any time recently, I’m going to put a bold star (✮) next to all the ones that haven’t been updated in more than three months. Two stars for ones that haven’t been updated in over six months, just so you know what you’re getting into.
At A Disadvantage - Set after arriving back in Storybrooke, I’m not even sure how to describe it… There’s conflicts and alliances and battles, Emma, Hook, Cora, Rumple, Neal, some world-jumping, flying monkeys - it’s super awesome, okay. ✮✮
Bested Thrice - Emma resorts to using her feminine wiles to beat Hook in their fight by the lake; things sort of spiral from there. ✮
Straight On Til Morning - There’s an extra spell on the bracer Hook gives Emma. This one’s fantastic, you should definitely check it out.
Fortune Favors The Brave - EF AU where Emma is Robin Hood. She starts off stealing from Hook, but ends up working with him before too long. ✮✮
The End Has Just Begun - Killian Jones is Emma’s boyfriend at the beginning of the series. Suuuuuuper awesome, just read it.
The Secret of Drowning - When Hook catches Aurora’s heart at the lake, he overbalances and falls through the portal… taking Emma with him. One of my all-time favorites. ✮
God Only Knows - When Emma falls through the portal after the wraith, Snow doesn’t follow in time. Emma ends up alone in the EF, where she soon meets Hook. Another absolute favorite.
Backlash - Emma is cursed, and Hook visits her in the hospital. This fic is actually an exception to a general rule of mine about a certain trope in this fandom. ✮✮
Screw Destiny - Emma finds out Hook is her True Love when she TLKs him out of a curse. She’s not exactly happy about this. (I don’t usually like those but this is a pretty good exception.)
Forget Me Not - Hook follows Emma after she leaves him on the beanstalk. Through a series of events, they end up in Neverland together.
Beautiful Tragic Love Affair - Emma goes back for Hook on the beanstalk, a choice which changes everything. To be completely honest I don’t remember too much about this one, guess I’ll have to reread it. But I’m pretty sure I remember liking it a lot, so.
At seventeen, I had been promoted from the general section of the store I was working at to the pharmacy. Due to my age, I was not allowed to handle any prescription medicine, so my shift typically consisted of typing in prescriptions, running refills through the system, and trouble shooting insurance problems. Given the high volume of customers in our pharmacy and my tendency to work the busiest shifts due to my school hours (4-10pm), I quickly learned many tricks that the other technicians, handling the medicines, did not. Unfortunately, customers often failed to realise this, sometimes waiting over a half hour for another technician to be available to type in their prescription.
One day, I entered my shift and immediately picked up a ringing phone, identifying the pharmacy by name and asking how I may help the customer.
A very harassed sounding voice responded, “Yeah, I’m [name]. I’ve been trying to get my son’s prescription to be covered by the insurance, but that obviously isn’t going to happen…” A frustrated sigh was emitted.
By this point, I already had the person’s profile and insurance information pulled up. I flipped to another screen. “What’s your son’s name?”
She supplied it and continued on, “But you’re not going to solve it, trust me. We’ve called the insurance company, we’ve called the pharmacy, we’ve had the pharmacy call the insurance company…”
As she was speaking, I flipped between the two screens, knowing that the most common reason for rejection of insurance is a mis-entering of the insurance card number. As family members typically have the same insurance card number, with the last number representing the birth order of the covered member, this is one of the most efficient ways to verify the correct information. This isn’t a trick I was taught; just something I picked up after being on intake for so long. Sure enough, it proved helpful - I noticed one of the digits of the mother’s number was the alphabetic “o”, whereas the numerical “0” had been entered in the same place in the child’s number. I changed it to an 0, and sent it through to the insurance, where it was successfully covered.
“I know there’s no way you can fix the problem, but I was wondering if I could pick up the original prescription and bring it to another pharmacy; maybe they’ll find a way to cover it.”
“Oh, that won’t be necessary. I ran it through while we were speaking. It’s covered.” I decided it was best not to explain the seemingly juvenile error, figuring one of the less experienced technicians had made the mistake.
“No, you must not understand what I’m saying. I’m talking about a prescription for [names medicine] for [names patient].
"Yes, the prescription was written today by [names doctor] and dropped off here at the pharmacy [names time]. Yes, that’s the prescription. It’s covered and the co-pay is [names price].”
She thanked me far more profusely than a typical customer usually does, before we hung up. She declared she’d be by in a few minutes and I assured her it’d be done in time, as it was one of the rare moments when there was absolutely no wait. I printed off the label, which was immediately sent to the printer by the pharmacist. I was heading back there to grab the label and greet everyone, when I heard the pharmacist scream, “Hey, [patient name]. Who ran this through?”
Thinking there was a problem, I nervously answered, “Um, I did. What’s wrong?”
I found myself being stared at by two pharmacist and three technicians, including the most knowledgeable technician in the pharmacy - aka, the one who knows the most about fixing insurance problems. “HOW did you get this to go through?”, the star technician asked in shock, “We’ve been on the phone with the insurance company all day!!!”
After that, I never had the other technicians coddle me - and they always backed me up whenever a customer demanded an older technician. The only way it would’ve been better was if the customer had been one of the ones who usually waited to be served by another technician!