Alright I’m getting frustrated with this.
again this makes me feel like I’ve lost a lot of my dignity, but here we go: 

Hello, unemployed nonbinary asexual youth artist here! I am broke as hell and I’ve been sleeping on an air mattress for 2 months because I can’t afford a real mattress! It currently has two holes in it and will probably have more and I’m out of the viynl repair kit stuff that came with it. My family is completely unwilling to help me on this one and I’ve been having trouble with my job hunt. If you would like to help me save up for a mattress so I can stop sleeping on the floor, please send me a donation. I would be eternally grateful and draw you a little something if you want! Even $1 would be appreciated!
ALTERNATIVELY: if you live in the tampa bay area and have a mattress you don’t want or are thinking of throwing away, please let me know! Don’t even want a box spring or anything, a plane ol mattress will do.

in case anyone is wondering what happened to my old mattress: my brother’s old mattress box spring broke, so they threw out his mattress and took mine to give to him while I was at college.
They told me they were going to replace it, but then they changed their minds and told me I’d have to earn it myself, because they’ve been upset with me lately, NAMELY for my expression of my life choices. I love my brother so I am okay with him having my mattress and it would be incredibly unfair to take it back from him, especially since he works almost every day. It’s kind of an unfair situation but I can definitely escape it by getting my own mattress without their help.  

Thank you!


Lydia would just like it on the record that camping is not her idea of fun. It doesn’t even come close to being her idea of fun, honestly, especially camping that involves a tent directly on the ground.

“We’re not going to be directly on the ground, Lydia,” Allison says with a roll od her eyes, shoving a duffle bag into the already crammed trunk of Derek’s mom car. “We’re putting mats down, and we have air mattresses.”

“Air mattresses are notoriously leaky,” Lydia retorts, unimpressed with Allison’s assurances. “The odds are good I’ll wake up on the ground with a rock poking into my back.”

All protests aside, though, Lydia is glad they’re going. Things are quiet, for once, and except for the fact that Allison came back from France without Isaac, sporting another post-break up haircut, things are good. Lydia recognizes that Allison needs this; Scott is, at least for the moment, still dating Kira, and although she doesn’t say it, Lydia knows Allison is disappointed. He’s the reason she and Isaac broke up, another thing that’s gone without saying. What Lydia doesn’t get it how first Jordan, and then Derek, ended up inviting themselves along. 

Okay, so she’s exaggerating. Jordan had seemed interested, when Lydia mentioned going camping with Allison; she had invited him along because she enjoys his company. He’d invited Derek because, somehow, the two of them had gotten to be buddies, and apparently Derek is going through his own break up funk.

So it’s just going to be the four of them, which of course won’t be awkward or tense at all.

This weekend is going to be a disaster. Lydia just wants it on the record. 

Well, the 1st night went okay.

I don’t have a real bed yet and brought my air mattress with me to get me through the first couple days. But throughout the night I kept waking up to it being more and more deflated, until finally I just rolled off it and slept on my yoga mat on the floor for the rest of the night.

Oh yeah and that whole Amtrak shipping deal I’ve been so excited about? It’s still a good deal and everything- but the station I have to travel to (about an hour away) is only open from 11 pm to 6 am! I’ve been cracking up about that one since yesterday, just because it is so perfect. I have been raving about this whole deal to everyone I know and then- BAM- the full story comes out. Anyways, I’ll figure it out. It’s not like I have a whole lot going on right now anyway, so I can be up at some weird hours for a couple days.

My advisor contacted me about babysitting her son in a couple weeks, which I’m excited about. I adore that kid and we spent a lot of time together before I left KY 2 years ago. I’m looking forward to getting to know this mysterious 9 year old version of the little boy.

My cats are doing okay. A friend came over to my apartment last night with a bottle of wine and we sort of followed the cats around as they explored the place. It’s mostly secure, though they did find that there is a mysterious storage room off my kitchen that is full of the landlord’s shit (paint cans, tools, etc). They both got lost in there for a minute and I was worried, but then the came back out and I blocked up the door. We’ll just never open it again.

I like living in funky old places with ‘character’, but that often means they are a little bit gross. The girl who lived there before me cleaned up okay, but I’m still gonna have to go through the whole place myself to get it up to my standards.

The last couple weeks have been crazy- an emotional roller coaster between the 10th anniversary of my Dad’s death (and father’s day, and his June birthday), saying goodbye to a place that I love and so many beautiful people, plus the stress of moving and driving myself cross-country with the kitty babies. I haven’t weighed myself yet, but I’m sure I gained back some of the weight I’ve lost. And my Grannuloma Annularae is in full flare up mode and looks TERRIBLE. I’ve been eating terribly and drinking a ton of caffeine. Gotta get myself back into healthy detox mode.

Blah. So many things.

Gonna go to Walmart today and get some essentials, see about setting up internet at my apartment, and rent a truck so I can get all my furniture tomorrow.

Then I’m gonna watch TV in the bathtub for like 3 days.

Adulting Life Hacks (Short List)
  • Buy an air mattress 12+ inches off the ground and a memory foam bed topper or two. It’ll cost hundreds less than a mattress and you’ll sleep just as good if not better. 
  • Wash your sheets once a week if you can. Yes, you will notice a difference. 
  • Never study/read/scroll through tumblr on your bed. Your brain associates activities with places. Associate your bed with sleeping. 
  • Grocery outlets are not below you. You can get the same produce at a steep discount, allowing those on a college sized budget to eat better. 
  • Invest in quality products (laptops, school supplies, clothes, ect) but don’t be outlandish. A laptop that will last you through a doctoral degree is one thing and a $200 pair of jeans is another. 
  • Never go to sleep with makeup on if you can help it. 
  • Cleanse, exfoliate, tone, THEN moisturize. 
  • Tea tree oil shampoos twice a week will heavily combat dandruff and scalp flakes. 
  • Invest in a pair of good sneakers and hiking shoes. Look for pairs at thrift stores and outlets. (I got a pair of leather Timberland boots for $20). 
  • Always carry an umbrella, a lip balm or chapstick, change, and a snack. 
  • Therapy does not mean you are weak or need help. Sometimes talking things out can let your brain focus on more important things. 

Stay positive my darlings.