agentbug

Chapter One

It was seven thirty in the morning when there was a loud bang in the bathroom followed by the clattering sounds of smaller items falling to the tiled floor.

“Bee? Bee, are you ok?” Bug called from the kitchen as she continued emptying the dishwasher.

“Bee?” she called out again. Still met by silence she went up the stairs to the bathroom. Peering in she found her wife sitting on the floor surrounded by hairclips, combs, hair gel tins and other hair products.

The agent slowly turned her head upwards and silently stared at Bug.

“What? What Bee? Are you ok? You’re beginning to worry me now.”

The agent cleared her throat.

“Bug… I.. I mean, we…” The agent swallowed hard. “We’re going to be parents.”

Bug felt her jaw drop. She closed her large eyes shutting them tight for a second before staring incredulously at the agent.

“But we’ve been so careful! Oh my god! Oh my god! OH. MY. GOD!” Bug put her hands in her hair.

“What are we going to do? I’m so young! We’re not ready! What if it cries? Oh my fucking god!”

“It will cry. And Bug… You are hyperventilating. “

“But what are we going to do? And how can you stay so calm?” Bug shrieked.

“Take parenting classes. We obviously appear to need them. At least one of us does,” the agent muttered the last bit under her breath.

Bug was pacing furiously back and forth, still running her hands through her hair.

“When? How long do we have? How much is there left of my youth? Oh god! Oh god!”

“Breathe honey. The usual of course. Five weeks. Did you not pay attention at all during biology. Honestly Bug.” The agent sighed.

Bug slumped down on the floor next the agent. She put her head on her wife’s shoulder and snaked her arm around the agent’s waist.

“Do you think it will look like me?”

AB Part II - chapter 2

Lying in bed next to her sleeping wife Bug’s thoughts raced through her head like runaway trains.

”Oh my god! We’re going to have a baby! A baby! What do you do with a baby? How do you raise a baby? Bee is going to be a great mother though. Good thing I have her. Yes.” Bug felt a little better. For a moment.

“Bee! You have get a different job! You can’t go out on missions and leave me alone with the baby!” Bug roughly shook the agent’s arm.

Startled the agent sat up in bed.

“What? What? Keep your breeches on, I’m awake!” With a sweeping motion she brought her service gun out from the holster by the bed and held it firmly in a two-hand grip in front of her. The following second Bug dived down beside the bed and swiftly rolled in under it. 

“Bee! Sorry! Forgot again,” came a muffled sound from under the bed. 

Frowning slightly the agent put the gun back in its place.

“You can come out again.”

Spitting out a small dust bunny Bug slid back out and slowly rose to her feet before getting back into bed.

“Bee. The gun thing… I mean, you’re all sorts of badass and sexy with your gun but I’d really rather you didn’t shoot me.  Especially now that we’re expecting.” Bug snuggled up to the agent.

“Which kind of brings us back to my point in the first place. I was wondering if, well you know, at least while the baby is small maybe you could take a normal job? One where you didn’t have to travel halfway around the world to put your life on the line on a regular basis. I’m going to need you more than ever and mini is going to need his or her mum.”

“Darling, is this a conversation we want to have at 03:30 in the morning? Can it wait until I’m back from  [XXXXXXXX] on Tuesday? I have a really early morning flight and I have to go clear up the mess the cretins at MI6 created over there.”