agent!loki

as fun as the ‘do you understand the meaning of undercover’-Blackwatch!McCree jokes are, here’s another thought:

Jesse McCree is an urban legend. Jesse McCree (and/or whatever name he was known by in Deadlock) is dead. Nobody got out of Deadlock and escaped jailtime alive. Jesse McCree can’t exist. And Blackwatch, obviously, also does not exist.

Jesse McCree in a Deadlock beltbuckle and 3′’ heels, in an all-black cowboy outfit in the middle of London, is refuge in audacity (if you’re familiar with “THE BUTTS MATCH” you know what I’m getting at). He doesn’t need to hide because he can’t reasonably be recognized. If you say “I saw Jesse McCree in all black and a cowboy hat and a fucking Deadlock insignia in the middle of King’s Row during the Null Sector crisis” you’re gonna be laughed at, at best.

MASTERLIST

Steve Rogers

Series

A Series of Unfathomable Feelings 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Mess with Them 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Epilogue

Bucky Barnes

Series

Live Wild 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 Epilogue
Spirit in the House 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Steve x Reader x Bucky

Series

Only Forever (Ao3)
WIP One Girl and Two Boys 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 HIATUS 

Loki Laufeyson x Reader

Series

A Piece of Cake (Ao3)
My Neighbour’s Brother (Ao3)

Others

Tony Stark x Reader - Candy Mountain

Banner by the wonderful @fanfictiongarden

I just did a Quickie with Oqwan ( @aguydrawsgames ‘s operative) and Carter.

After we briefly chatted about agenty music from the U.N.C.L.E. Soundtrack….and so..

It kinda got me going on that.

-cue blowy flute agenty music-

Imagine that instead of imprisoning Loki in the palace Odin returned him to Earth, to work as an indentured servant “Until the Midgardians feel that your debt is repaid”

Lots of people buy Loki’s “servitude” for short periods, so that they can revenge themselves upon him for the attack on New York, and there’s a lively media stream where people can watch him be abused.

Becoming ever more disgusted by what is being done to Loki, you sell almost everything that you own, so that you can buy an entire year of Loki’s service (the longest term available).

You help him to heal from the injuries caused by his previous keepers, and little by little, win his trust. Once he realises that you genuinely want nothing in return for your assistance, he begins to fall in love with you.