age of barbarian

One thing that stuck out to me about the Jaws of Hakkon DLC is that, every time one of the companions or the Inquisitor is condescending towards the Avvar about their spiritual practices, treating them like quaint barbarians courting possession, it’s always the non-Avvar in the interaction who comes across as ignorant and superstitious. 

Because the Avvar obviously know what they’re doing. They’ve spend possibly thousands of years learning about spirits and forging a mutually-beneficial symbiotic relationship. They interact with spirits on a daily basis, even those who aren’t mages. They understand how this all works. They have actual expertise.

Lowlanders, on the other hand, don’t know shit about spirits (with a few exceptions like Solas and Cole, but like, those are unusual cases to say the least). But they don’t realize that they don’t know shit. And they come in all arrogant and certain, and to the Avvar they must sound like gibbering fools.

I don’t know, it’s just so funny to me. “Civilized” folks embarrassing themselves in front of “barbarians”.

Rúmerion Classes

Most beings fit into the following classes within society regardless of a social standing, the 12 largest classes are as follows:

  • Barbarian
  • Bard
  • Cleric
  • Druid
  • Fighter
  • Monk
  • Paladin
  • Ranger
  • Rogue
  • Sorcerer
  • Warlock
  • Wizard

There are variants within this but there are also many more classes, here are some examples:

  • Alchemist
  • Archer
  • Assassin
  • Battle medic
  • Beast master
  • Berserker
  • Blood mage
  • Bounty hunter
  • Criminal
  • Cuisine
  • Dancer
  • Daring swashbuckler
  • Dark lord
  • Demolitionist
  • Demon hunter
  • Dragon slayer
  • Drunken brawler
  • Elemental assassin
  • Enchanter
  • Engineers
  • Fencing magician
  • Gladiator
  • Gunslinger
  • Harlequin
  • Hunter
  • Inventor
  • Knight
  • Luchador
  • Mage blade
  • Master of cards
  • Master of ceremonies
  • Merchant
  • Mime
  • Necromancer
  • Oath breaker
  • Pirate
  • Plague doctor
  • Pyromancer
  • Ring master
  • Rune seeker
  • Samurai
  • Shadow knight
  • Shadow thief
  • Shaman
  • Shrine maiden
  • Singer
  • Story teller
  • Survivor
  • Swashbuckler
  • Tarot reader
  • Tavern brawler
  • Valkyrie
  • Vampire
  • Vigilante
  • War general
  • Warlord
  • Weapon master
  • Witch
  • Witch doctor
  • Wrestler
  • Zombie

These classes can be focused on and help individuals develop skillsets unique to them. Most people of Rúmerion are known by their classes as their titles for example ‘The Knights of Falfire’.

Live Another Life

Thank you @Sciencebimbo! I’m always looking for prompts, I struggle with creating new ideas… Plus I’ve been spending plenty of time on discord with @thecurvyshade and Co. hehe. I love your blog and I hope you like!

James was a massive fan of RPG’s, the mainstream, the arcade, and the indie. He always seemed to be looking to escape his life into the realm of video games. It’s not uncommon for someone to do this, but James was addicted. He spent many many hours delving into any and all types of RPG he could find… Modern war, Magical realms, Mythological crossovers… But one day he came across a new game on an online store…

“AoB? That’s all it says… Age of…? Barbarians… Brutes… Beauty?” He seemed majorly confused, the letters adorning the top of the screen with a busty lady wearing skimpy armour, also not uncommon among these indie games…

He went ahead and bought the game, booting it up instantly after download… still not knowing exactly what this was… The screen flashed up reading ‘Are you Male/Female?’ He selected male as the screen flashed red and a second screen popped up. ‘Do you want to live another life?’ He instantly pressed yes, waiting for the game to start as a black screen remained until a flash of pink engulfed it and seemingly wiped his mind.

‘Are you a girl?’ The screen said… James unconsciously clicked yes.
*FLASH* James’ eyes radiating the same colour…

[Please select hair colour] (Red/Blonde/Brunette/Black) James clicked…

His hair began to lengthen… slowly down to his shoulders and below turning a platinum blonde as it did… *FLASH*

[Please select facial features] (Pretty in Pink/Sultry Red Slut/Punky Purple) James clicked…

His face became more soft and feminine, fake eyelashes appeared on his face as his cheeks began to develop a natural blush, his lips slowly plumping out as a sheen of pink lip gloss appeared over them. *FLASH*

[Please select cup size] (C/D/DD/E/EE/F/G/GG) James clicked

He let out a lewd moan in a new feminine voice as mounds sprouted from beneath his shirt… slowly getting bigger and bigger until his shirt couldn’t hold his new tits… They expanded more and more until resting at E-Cup *FLASH*

[Please select pussy and ass] (Tight virgin holes/Prissy Prude/Dirty Slut/Fuck Toy) James clicked…

James’ manhood began to shrink, sucking inwards until a womanhood formed in it’s place, open, wide and dripping, as if having her holes open as a gaping tease was natural *FLASH*

[Select mind-set] (Bubbly Bimbo/Submissive Slave/Ditzy Doll) Click…
The screen flashed for the last time and displayed a message

‘Thank you for downloading Age of Bimbos, We hope you enjoy your new life! Why not invite a friend to play with?

“Like, that’s suuuuch a good idea! I should go gets my other friends and show em this amazing game! Maaaaaaybe I could fuck em a little first…” She giggled as she felt her new pussy and ass already gaping “Mmmmm I definitely need to be filled before I show my friends…. Mmmm Janine needs cock!”

Age of Bimbos, Now available for free download on PC and Mac!

Gleaming shell of an outworn lie; fable of Right divine-
You gained your crowns by heritage, but Blood was the price of mine.
The throne that I won by blood and sweat, by Crom, I will not sell
For promise of valleys filled with gold, or threat of the Halls of Hell!

When I was a fighting-man, the kettle-drums they beat,
The people scattered gold-dust before my horse’s feet;
But now I am a great king, the people hound my track
With poison in my wine-cup, and daggers at my back.

What do I know of cultured ways, the gilt, the craft and the lie?
I, who was born in a naked land and bred in the open sky.
The subtle tongue, the sophist guile, they fail when the broadswords sing;
Rush in and die, dogs - I was a man before I was a king!

—  The Road of Kings by Robert E. Howard, sung of King Conan of Aquilonia
i’m mad at you guys

I have all these followers and not ONE of you can tell me how big whale nipples are. jfc what kind of barbarian age do I fucking live in? TELL ME NOW. 

“What do I know of cultured ways, the gilt, the craft and the lie?
I, who was born in a naked land and bred in the open sky.
The subtle tongue, the sophist guile, they fail when the broadswords sing;
Rush in and die, dogs—I was a man before I was a king.”
             —   Robert E. Howard

here’s some thunderbob making borsht
thunderbob is a little barbarian guy wearing bast shoes and lynxskin panties and carrying a greenwood cudgel, who lives somewhere on the distant edge of the œcumene right in the middle of the dark ages and barbarian invasions and migrations of huns, vandals and the rest
and i want to make some comics with him once, so if you’ve got ideas of what adventures he could have - please share them and we’ll make some stuff with him