agatean empire

Rincewind had always understood that the Agatean Empire was a peaceful place. It was civilized. They invented things. In fact, he recalled, he’d been instrumental in introducing a few of their devices to Ankh-Morpork. Simple, innocent things, like clocks worked by demons, and boxes that painted pictures, and extra glass eyes you could wear over the top of your own eyes to help you see better, even if it did mean you made a spectacle of yourself.
—  Terry Pratchett, Interesting Times

The editors are indebted to the executors of the estate of the late Mr Ronald Saveloy–advisor to Ghenghiz Cohen and retired geography teacher, whose extensive journeys within the Agatean Empire gave him a great insight into the people and features of this land, recorded by him in meticulous detail and at least three different colours–for access to his notes.  The map above (a facsimile of a valuable artefact from the library of the late Lord Hong found among the effects of Mr Saveloy) shows some topographical detail and the location of the major cities.

–Terry Pratchett, “The Compleat Discworld Atlas”
(Illustration by Peter Dennis)

(The book also contains excerpts from Teach’s journal about his travels with the Horde, and I’m not crying you’re crying.)

Commission for the lovely @alynnl :D - Twoflower “coronation” as the Emperor of the Agatean Empire.

[Rincewind is feeling unconfortable in his fancy dress (a loan by gracious permission of the Archchancellor Ridcully)]

Rincewind: There’ll be a bunch of guards on us at any moment, right? Someone will going to cut off serious bits of me, right? Right?

Pretty Butterfly: Calm down, wizard. The worst that could happen is my father wearing his “I ♥  Ankh-Morpork” hat.

Rincewind: Yeah, ok… Damn, I hate this robe.

Lotus Blossom: I think it looks good on you, Great Wizard.

Rincewind: mmph!

Also Twoflower, after 4 seconds :

“Listen to me, will you?” Rincewind said, settling down a little. “I know about people who talk about suffering for the common good. It’s never bloody them! When you hear a man shouting "Forward, brave comrades!”, you’ll see he’s the one behind the bloody big rock and wearing the only really arrow-proof helmet! Understand?“

He stopped. The cadre were looking at him as if he was mad. He looked at their young, keen faces and suddenly felt very, very old.

"But there are causes worth dying for.” said Butterfly.

“No, there aren’t! Because you’ve only got one life, but you can pick up another five causes on any street corner!”

“Good grief, how can you live with a philosophy like that?”

Rincewind took a deep breath.


—  Terry Pratchett, Interesting Times.
Agatean Empire.

Capital city: Hung-hung. Principal and only port: Bes Pelargic. Pop.: about 50,000,000. Old, cunning and very, very rich empire on the Counterweight Continent, also called Aurient, because of its gold deposits. Once ruled by the Sun Emperor, who was considered by his subjects to be a god (i.e. someone who can kill you instantly for no reason and not have to say sorry). Following the events of Interesting Times, it was ruled for a while by Ghenghiz Cohen. Agatean architecture is inclined towards squat pyramids; there is a wall built round the entire Empire, around twenty feet high and sheer on its inner side. In the bad old days, it was patrolled by the Heavenly Guard in very heavy boots to jump on the fingers of the terminally inquisitive. Ladders and tall trees anywhere near the wall were emphatically discouraged.

There is only one port because the Empire did not encourage more contact with the outside world than was absolutely necessary. To be a citizen of the Agatean Empire, it was felt, was to be the most fortunate of mortals, and the old government wanted its citizens to remain steadfast in that belief; it was important, therefore, to encourage the suggestion that anywhere else was a mere barbaric wasteland, inhabited by legions of vampire ghosts. The benefits of a period under the rule of a genuine barbarian invader have yet to make themselves shown outside the walls.